Moral Orel (2005–2009): Season 3, Episode 11 - Sacrifice - full transcript
>> Clay: [ GRUNTS ]
[ SIGHS ]
>> AAAAAAH!
[ SIGHS ]
>> AAAAAAH!
>> Clay: [ GROANS ]
>> AAAAAAH!
>> Clay: [ GROANS ]
MY LIFE.
>> Clay: [ GROANS ]
MY LIFE.
>> Shapey: YUMMY!
MY LIFE.
>> Shapey: YUMMY!
>> Clay: YUMMY.
>> Shapey: YUMMY!
>> Clay: YUMMY.
>> OOH, FRIEND.
>> Clay: YUMMY.
>> OOH, FRIEND.
>> Clay: HUH?
>> OOH, FRIEND.
>> Clay: HUH?
HMM.
>> Clay: HUH?
HMM.
>> YAY, BIRDIE!
HMM.
>> YAY, BIRDIE!
>> Clay: [ MURMURS ]
>> YAY, BIRDIE!
>> Clay: [ MURMURS ]
[ GROANS ]
>> Clay: [ MURMURS ]
[ GROANS ]
WATCH, UH...
[ GROANS ]
WATCH, UH...
>> Bloberta: IF MEN MARRED MEN
WATCH, UH...
>> Bloberta: IF MEN MARRED MEN
AND WOMEN MARRED WOMEN, WE'D ALL
>> Bloberta: IF MEN MARRED MEN
AND WOMEN MARRED WOMEN, WE'D ALL
GIVE BIRTH TO NOTHING BUT
AND WOMEN MARRED WOMEN, WE'D ALL
GIVE BIRTH TO NOTHING BUT
FAIRYSEXUALS.
GIVE BIRTH TO NOTHING BUT
FAIRYSEXUALS.
>> Orel: BUT WHY DID YOU MARRY
FAIRYSEXUALS.
>> Orel: BUT WHY DID YOU MARRY
DAD?
>> Orel: BUT WHY DID YOU MARRY
DAD?
>> Clay: HUH?
DAD?
>> Clay: HUH?
>> Bloberta: OH, WELL...
>> Clay: HUH?
>> Bloberta: OH, WELL...
[ GIGGLES ]
>> Bloberta: OH, WELL...
[ GIGGLES ]
WHY NOT?
>> Orel: W-WELL, IT'S JUST THAT
W-WHEN HE DRINKS, HE CHANGES.
>> Rev. Putty: HAPPY EASTER.
W-WHEN HE DRINKS, HE CHANGES.
>> Rev. Putty: HAPPY EASTER.
BY THE LOOK OF ALL YOUR PATHETIC
>> Rev. Putty: HAPPY EASTER.
BY THE LOOK OF ALL YOUR PATHETIC
MUGS, I'D SAY YOU ALL HAD AS
BY THE LOOK OF ALL YOUR PATHETIC
MUGS, I'D SAY YOU ALL HAD AS
GOOD A WEEK AS I HAD.
>> THESE ARE MY ZEBRAS.
>> Rev. Putty: OH, FLORENCE.
>> [ GIGGLING ]
>> Rev. Putty: OH, FLORENCE.
>> [ GIGGLING ]
>> Rev. Putty: OH, GOD.
>> [ GIGGLING ]
>> Rev. Putty: OH, GOD.
OH, GOD!
>> Rev. Putty: OH, GOD.
OH, GOD!
DOTTIE!
OH, GOD!
DOTTIE!
>> [ SOBBING ]
DOTTIE!
>> [ SOBBING ]
WELL, IF YOU REMEMBER LAST
>> [ SOBBING ]
WELL, IF YOU REMEMBER LAST
WEEK'S SERMON, I ENDED IT WITH A
WELL, IF YOU REMEMBER LAST
WEEK'S SERMON, I ENDED IT WITH A
LITTLE CLIFF-HANGER.
WEEK'S SERMON, I ENDED IT WITH A
LITTLE CLIFF-HANGER.
WHAT WAS IN THE TOMB WHEN
LITTLE CLIFF-HANGER.
WHAT WAS IN THE TOMB WHEN
MARY MAGDALENE AND COMPANY
WHAT WAS IN THE TOMB WHEN
MARY MAGDALENE AND COMPANY
CHECKED IT OUT?
MARY MAGDALENE AND COMPANY
CHECKED IT OUT?
WELL, HERE'S THE ANSWER.
CHECKED IT OUT?
WELL, HERE'S THE ANSWER.
NOTHING.
WELL, HERE'S THE ANSWER.
NOTHING.
NOTHING WAS IN THE TOMB.
NOTHING.
NOTHING WAS IN THE TOMB.
NOW, USUALLY NOTHING IS A
NOTHING WAS IN THE TOMB.
NOW, USUALLY NOTHING IS A
DOWNER -- ONE BIG GOOSE EGG.
NOW, USUALLY NOTHING IS A
DOWNER -- ONE BIG GOOSE EGG.
WELL, THIS TIME, THE GOOSE LAID
DOWNER -- ONE BIG GOOSE EGG.
WELL, THIS TIME, THE GOOSE LAID
A GOLDEN EGG, PEOPLE.
WELL, THIS TIME, THE GOOSE LAID
A GOLDEN EGG, PEOPLE.
NOTHING MEANT HOPE FOR EVERYONE.
A GOLDEN EGG, PEOPLE.
NOTHING MEANT HOPE FOR EVERYONE.
SO THE NEXT TIME YOU LOOK AND
NOTHING MEANT HOPE FOR EVERYONE.
SO THE NEXT TIME YOU LOOK AND
SEE NOTHING, HAVE A LITTLE HOPE,
SO THE NEXT TIME YOU LOOK AND
SEE NOTHING, HAVE A LITTLE HOPE,
WILL YOU?
SEE NOTHING, HAVE A LITTLE HOPE,
WILL YOU?
FOR ME.
WILL YOU?
FOR ME.
AMEN.
FOR ME.
AMEN.
[ BIRDS CHIRPING ]
AMEN.
[ BIRDS CHIRPING ]
>> Orel: REVEREND PUTTY, I AGREE
[ BIRDS CHIRPING ]
>> Orel: REVEREND PUTTY, I AGREE
WITH YOU THAT...
>> Orel: REVEREND PUTTY, I AGREE
WITH YOU THAT...
OH.
WITH YOU THAT...
OH.
>> WHERE DID HE GO?
OH.
>> WHERE DID HE GO?
WHERE'D HE GO?
>> WHERE DID HE GO?
WHERE'D HE GO?
>> Clay: COME ON!
WHERE'D HE GO?
>> Clay: COME ON!
>> HI, CLAY.
>> Clay: COME ON!
>> HI, CLAY.
>> Clay: WHAT IS IT -- A
>> HI, CLAY.
>> Clay: WHAT IS IT -- A
HOLIDAY, DOLLY?
>> Clay: WHAT IS IT -- A
HOLIDAY, DOLLY?
>> EASTER GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU?
HOLIDAY, DOLLY?
>> EASTER GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU?
>> Clay: OH, RIGHT.
>> EASTER GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU?
>> Clay: OH, RIGHT.
>> MISSED YOU THE LAST FEW DAYS.
>> Clay: OH, RIGHT.
>> MISSED YOU THE LAST FEW DAYS.
>> Clay: YEAH.
>> MISSED YOU THE LAST FEW DAYS.
>> Clay: YEAH.
TOOK THE KID ON A HUNTING TRIP.
>> Clay: YEAH.
TOOK THE KID ON A HUNTING TRIP.
>> OREL?
TOOK THE KID ON A HUNTING TRIP.
>> OREL?
HE DIDN'T KILL ANYTHING, DID HE?
>> OREL?
HE DIDN'T KILL ANYTHING, DID HE?
>> Clay: LOOK, EVERYTHING WENT
HE DIDN'T KILL ANYTHING, DID HE?
>> Clay: LOOK, EVERYTHING WENT
LIKE CLOCKWORK.
>> Clay: LOOK, EVERYTHING WENT
LIKE CLOCKWORK.
WE WERE FATHER AND SON, GOT SOME
LIKE CLOCKWORK.
WE WERE FATHER AND SON, GOT SOME
FRESH AIR, THINGS DIED, CAME
WE WERE FATHER AND SON, GOT SOME
FRESH AIR, THINGS DIED, CAME
HOME.
FRESH AIR, THINGS DIED, CAME
HOME.
GET OFF MY BACK.
HOME.
GET OFF MY BACK.
>> FORGHETTY'S.
GET OFF MY BACK.
>> FORGHETTY'S.
CLAY, IT'S THE OFFICE.
>> FORGHETTY'S.
CLAY, IT'S THE OFFICE.
>> Clay: TELL THEM IT'S EASTER.
CLAY, IT'S THE OFFICE.
>> Clay: TELL THEM IT'S EASTER.
AND I'M NOT HERE!
>> Clay: TELL THEM IT'S EASTER.
AND I'M NOT HERE!
OH, AND TELL THEM THEY NEED TO
AND I'M NOT HERE!
OH, AND TELL THEM THEY NEED TO
ORDER MORE PAPERWEIGHTS!
OH, AND TELL THEM THEY NEED TO
ORDER MORE PAPERWEIGHTS!
>> YEAH, DID YOU HEAR THAT?
ORDER MORE PAPERWEIGHTS!
>> YEAH, DID YOU HEAR THAT?
[ Laughing ] OKAY.
>> YEAH, DID YOU HEAR THAT?
[ Laughing ] OKAY.
>> Clay: DON'T LOOK AT ME LIKE
[ Laughing ] OKAY.
>> Clay: DON'T LOOK AT ME LIKE
THAT.
>> Clay: DON'T LOOK AT ME LIKE
THAT.
I'M VERY RESPONSIBLE.
THAT.
I'M VERY RESPONSIBLE.
>> USUALLY.
I'M VERY RESPONSIBLE.
>> USUALLY.
>> Clay: DOLLY, IF I GO TO WORK
>> USUALLY.
>> Clay: DOLLY, IF I GO TO WORK
TODAY, I'M GONNA KILL SOMEBODY.
>> Clay: DOLLY, IF I GO TO WORK
TODAY, I'M GONNA KILL SOMEBODY.
>> I SEE.
TODAY, I'M GONNA KILL SOMEBODY.
>> I SEE.
WELL, AT LEAST YOU PUT IN THAT
>> I SEE.
WELL, AT LEAST YOU PUT IN THAT
PAPERWEIGHT ORDER.
WELL, AT LEAST YOU PUT IN THAT
PAPERWEIGHT ORDER.
>> Clay: IT WON'T BE ENOUGH!
PAPERWEIGHT ORDER.
>> Clay: IT WON'T BE ENOUGH!
THEY NEVER GET ENOUGH.
>> Clay: IT WON'T BE ENOUGH!
THEY NEVER GET ENOUGH.
ALWAYS SO MUCH MORE PAPER THAN
THEY NEVER GET ENOUGH.
ALWAYS SO MUCH MORE PAPER THAN
THERE ARE WEIGHTS.
ALWAYS SO MUCH MORE PAPER THAN
THERE ARE WEIGHTS.
YOU KNOW HOW MUCH PAPERWORK I
THERE ARE WEIGHTS.
YOU KNOW HOW MUCH PAPERWORK I
HAVE?
YOU KNOW HOW MUCH PAPERWORK I
HAVE?
IT NEVER STOPS!
HAVE?
IT NEVER STOPS!
I DON'T KNOW HOW IT HAPPENS.
IT NEVER STOPS!
I DON'T KNOW HOW IT HAPPENS.
YOU START OUT IN LIFE AS A
I DON'T KNOW HOW IT HAPPENS.
YOU START OUT IN LIFE AS A
LITTLE BABY --
YOU START OUT IN LIFE AS A
LITTLE BABY --
>> UH-HUH. NO PAPERWORK.
LITTLE BABY --
>> UH-HUH. NO PAPERWORK.
>> Clay: EXACTLY. NO PAPERWORK.
>> UH-HUH. NO PAPERWORK.
>> Clay: EXACTLY. NO PAPERWORK.
BUT DO WE APPRECIATE IT, ALL US
>> Clay: EXACTLY. NO PAPERWORK.
BUT DO WE APPRECIATE IT, ALL US
LITTLE BABIES?
BUT DO WE APPRECIATE IT, ALL US
LITTLE BABIES?
NO, WE CRY, CRY, CRY, CRY, CRY,
LITTLE BABIES?
NO, WE CRY, CRY, CRY, CRY, CRY,
CRY, CRY, CRY, CRY, CRY, CRY,
NO, WE CRY, CRY, CRY, CRY, CRY,
CRY, CRY, CRY, CRY, CRY, CRY,
CRY, CRY, CRY.
CRY, CRY, CRY, CRY, CRY, CRY,
CRY, CRY, CRY.
>> WELL, I GUESS WHEN YOU HAVE A
CRY, CRY, CRY.
>> WELL, I GUESS WHEN YOU HAVE A
FAMILY, THAT'S THE SACRIFICE YOU
>> WELL, I GUESS WHEN YOU HAVE A
FAMILY, THAT'S THE SACRIFICE YOU
MAKE.
FAMILY, THAT'S THE SACRIFICE YOU
MAKE.
>> Clay: SACRIFICE -- EXACTLY.
MAKE.
>> Clay: SACRIFICE -- EXACTLY.
I SACRIFICED THE ULTIMATE
>> Clay: SACRIFICE -- EXACTLY.
I SACRIFICED THE ULTIMATE
SACRIFICE -- MY HAPPINESS FOR MY
I SACRIFICED THE ULTIMATE
SACRIFICE -- MY HAPPINESS FOR MY
KIDS.
SACRIFICE -- MY HAPPINESS FOR MY
KIDS.
YOU BET I DID!
KIDS.
YOU BET I DID!
YOU...BET...I...DID.
YOU BET I DID!
YOU...BET...I...DID.
AND I'D DO IT AGAIN, TOO.
YOU...BET...I...DID.
AND I'D DO IT AGAIN, TOO.
I'D DO IT OVER AND OVER AGAIN.
AND I'D DO IT AGAIN, TOO.
I'D DO IT OVER AND OVER AGAIN.
THAT'S MY LIFE -- OVER AND OVER
I'D DO IT OVER AND OVER AGAIN.
THAT'S MY LIFE -- OVER AND OVER
AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND
THAT'S MY LIFE -- OVER AND OVER
AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND
OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER
AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND
OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER
AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND
OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER
AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND
OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER
AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND
OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER
AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND
OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER
AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND
OVER...
AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND
OVER...
>> OKAY, CLAY. I GET THE POINT.
OVER...
>> OKAY, CLAY. I GET THE POINT.
>> Clay: NO, YOU DON'T!
>> OKAY, CLAY. I GET THE POINT.
>> Clay: NO, YOU DON'T!
AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND
>> Clay: NO, YOU DON'T!
AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND
OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER
AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND
OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER
AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND
OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER
AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND
OVER AND --
AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND
OVER AND --
>> Rev. Putty: IT'S OVER!
OVER AND --
>> Rev. Putty: IT'S OVER!
>> Clay: OH, THE DOOR!
>> Rev. Putty: IT'S OVER!
>> Clay: OH, THE DOOR!
>> Rev. Putty: OH.
>> Clay: OH, THE DOOR!
>> Rev. Putty: OH.
>> HOWDY, REVEREND.
>> Rev. Putty: OH.
>> HOWDY, REVEREND.
>> Rev. Putty: YEAH, BACK AT
>> HOWDY, REVEREND.
>> Rev. Putty: YEAH, BACK AT
YOU.
>> Rev. Putty: YEAH, BACK AT
YOU.
>> Clay: THE REVEREND PUTTY.
YOU.
>> Clay: THE REVEREND PUTTY.
I DO BELIEVE THAT WAS THE
>> Clay: THE REVEREND PUTTY.
I DO BELIEVE THAT WAS THE
EX-MRS. PAPERMOUTH, HMM?
I DO BELIEVE THAT WAS THE
EX-MRS. PAPERMOUTH, HMM?
>> Rev. Putty: MM. SEVEN/SEVEN.
EX-MRS. PAPERMOUTH, HMM?
>> Rev. Putty: MM. SEVEN/SEVEN.
>> WELL, I CERTAINLY DIDN'T
>> Rev. Putty: MM. SEVEN/SEVEN.
>> WELL, I CERTAINLY DIDN'T
EXPECT TO BE KEPT COMPANY BY TWO
>> WELL, I CERTAINLY DIDN'T
EXPECT TO BE KEPT COMPANY BY TWO
HANDSOME GENTLEMEN TODAY.
EXPECT TO BE KEPT COMPANY BY TWO
HANDSOME GENTLEMEN TODAY.
>> Rev. Putty: YEAH, KEEP IT IN
HANDSOME GENTLEMEN TODAY.
>> Rev. Putty: YEAH, KEEP IT IN
YOUR PANTS.
>> Rev. Putty: YEAH, KEEP IT IN
YOUR PANTS.
I'M THROUGH WITH WOMEN.
YOUR PANTS.
I'M THROUGH WITH WOMEN.
>> Clay: AMEN.
I'M THROUGH WITH WOMEN.
>> Clay: AMEN.
>> YOU'RE THROUGH WITH WOMEN,
>> Clay: AMEN.
>> YOU'RE THROUGH WITH WOMEN,
REVEREND?
>> YOU'RE THROUGH WITH WOMEN,
REVEREND?
>> Rev. Putty: YEAH.
REVEREND?
>> Rev. Putty: YEAH.
WELL, EVEN THOUGH I'M A
>> Rev. Putty: YEAH.
WELL, EVEN THOUGH I'M A
PROTESTANT MAN OF THE CLOTH, I
WELL, EVEN THOUGH I'M A
PROTESTANT MAN OF THE CLOTH, I
STILL FIGURE I SHOULD MAKE SOME
PROTESTANT MAN OF THE CLOTH, I
STILL FIGURE I SHOULD MAKE SOME
SORT OF --
STILL FIGURE I SHOULD MAKE SOME
SORT OF --
>> Clay: SACRIFICE?
SORT OF --
>> Clay: SACRIFICE?
>> Rev. Putty: YEAH, THAT'S THE
>> Clay: SACRIFICE?
>> Rev. Putty: YEAH, THAT'S THE
WORD.
>> Rev. Putty: YEAH, THAT'S THE
WORD.
>> Clay: WELL, GET IN LINE,
WORD.
>> Clay: WELL, GET IN LINE,
BUDDY.
>> Clay: WELL, GET IN LINE,
BUDDY.
>> WELL, THE REVEREND
BUDDY.
>> WELL, THE REVEREND
SACRIFICING IS VERY FITTING ON A
>> WELL, THE REVEREND
SACRIFICING IS VERY FITTING ON A
DAY LIKE TODAY.
SACRIFICING IS VERY FITTING ON A
DAY LIKE TODAY.
>> Clay: OH, REALLY?
DAY LIKE TODAY.
>> Clay: OH, REALLY?
WHY ESPECIALLY TODAY,
>> Clay: OH, REALLY?
WHY ESPECIALLY TODAY,
ALBERT VAGINASTEIN?
WHY ESPECIALLY TODAY,
ALBERT VAGINASTEIN?
>> EASTER -- THE REVEREND'S
ALBERT VAGINASTEIN?
>> EASTER -- THE REVEREND'S
SACRIFICING LIKE OUR LORD HAS
>> EASTER -- THE REVEREND'S
SACRIFICING LIKE OUR LORD HAS
SACRIFICED.
SACRIFICING LIKE OUR LORD HAS
SACRIFICED.
RIGHT, REVEREND?
SACRIFICED.
RIGHT, REVEREND?
>> Rev. Putty: YES.
RIGHT, REVEREND?
>> Rev. Putty: YES.
>> Clay: DON'T GET ME WRONG.
>> Rev. Putty: YES.
>> Clay: DON'T GET ME WRONG.
JESUS WAS NICE, BUT THE GUY HAD
>> Clay: DON'T GET ME WRONG.
JESUS WAS NICE, BUT THE GUY HAD
EVERYTHING.
JESUS WAS NICE, BUT THE GUY HAD
EVERYTHING.
HE KNEW HE WAS THE SON OF GOD.
EVERYTHING.
HE KNEW HE WAS THE SON OF GOD.
YOU CAN'T GET MORE PRIVILEGED
HE KNEW HE WAS THE SON OF GOD.
YOU CAN'T GET MORE PRIVILEGED
THAN THAT.
YOU CAN'T GET MORE PRIVILEGED
THAN THAT.
>> Rev. Putty: LOOK, YOU TRY
THAN THAT.
>> Rev. Putty: LOOK, YOU TRY
GETTING CRUCIFIED!
>> Rev. Putty: LOOK, YOU TRY
GETTING CRUCIFIED!
>> Clay: MAYBE I WILL, IF I HAVE
GETTING CRUCIFIED!
>> Clay: MAYBE I WILL, IF I HAVE
THE TIME!
>> Clay: MAYBE I WILL, IF I HAVE
THE TIME!
I'M A LITTLE BUSY DOING SOME
THE TIME!
I'M A LITTLE BUSY DOING SOME
REAL SACRIFICING, THANK YOU VERY
I'M A LITTLE BUSY DOING SOME
REAL SACRIFICING, THANK YOU VERY
MUCH.
REAL SACRIFICING, THANK YOU VERY
MUCH.
>> Rev. Putty: OH, CRUCIFIXION
MUCH.
>> Rev. Putty: OH, CRUCIFIXION
ISN'T ENOUGH OF A SACRIFICE FOR
>> Rev. Putty: OH, CRUCIFIXION
ISN'T ENOUGH OF A SACRIFICE FOR
YOU?
ISN'T ENOUGH OF A SACRIFICE FOR
YOU?
>> Clay: LOOK, ONCE YOU GET
YOU?
>> Clay: LOOK, ONCE YOU GET
CRUCIFIED, YOU CAN DO NO WRONG!
>> Clay: LOOK, ONCE YOU GET
CRUCIFIED, YOU CAN DO NO WRONG!
EVERYBODY LOVES YOU!
CRUCIFIED, YOU CAN DO NO WRONG!
EVERYBODY LOVES YOU!
WELL, SOME OF US DON'T HAVE THAT
EVERYBODY LOVES YOU!
WELL, SOME OF US DON'T HAVE THAT
LUXURY.
WELL, SOME OF US DON'T HAVE THAT
LUXURY.
THERE'S A LITTLE THING CALLED
LUXURY.
THERE'S A LITTLE THING CALLED
SUPPORTING A FAMILY THAT JESUS
THERE'S A LITTLE THING CALLED
SUPPORTING A FAMILY THAT JESUS
NEVER GOT AROUND TO DOING.
SUPPORTING A FAMILY THAT JESUS
NEVER GOT AROUND TO DOING.
>> Rev. Putty: YOU'RE AMAZING.
NEVER GOT AROUND TO DOING.
>> Rev. Putty: YOU'RE AMAZING.
THE BEER GOGGLES YOU HAVE ON
>> Rev. Putty: YOU'RE AMAZING.
THE BEER GOGGLES YOU HAVE ON
RIGHT NOW ARE MAKING CRUCIFIXION
THE BEER GOGGLES YOU HAVE ON
RIGHT NOW ARE MAKING CRUCIFIXION
LOOK LIKE MARILYN MONROE.
RIGHT NOW ARE MAKING CRUCIFIXION
LOOK LIKE MARILYN MONROE.
>> Clay: I NEVER DRINK BEER.
LOOK LIKE MARILYN MONROE.
>> Clay: I NEVER DRINK BEER.
>> Rev. Putty: CLOSE THE DOOR!
>> Clay: I NEVER DRINK BEER.
>> Rev. Putty: CLOSE THE DOOR!
>> OH, HELLO.
>> Rev. Putty: CLOSE THE DOOR!
>> OH, HELLO.
>> Clay: UH-OH.
>> OH, HELLO.
>> Clay: UH-OH.
HOLD ON TO YOUR YAWNS, EVERYONE.
>> Clay: UH-OH.
HOLD ON TO YOUR YAWNS, EVERYONE.
IT'S OFFICER EXCITEMENT!
HOLD ON TO YOUR YAWNS, EVERYONE.
IT'S OFFICER EXCITEMENT!
>> REVEREND, I FINALLY GOT TO
IT'S OFFICER EXCITEMENT!
>> REVEREND, I FINALLY GOT TO
GET THE DAY OFF AND HEAR YOUR
>> REVEREND, I FINALLY GOT TO
GET THE DAY OFF AND HEAR YOUR
SERMON THIS MORNING.
GET THE DAY OFF AND HEAR YOUR
SERMON THIS MORNING.
REALLY INSPIRATIONAL.
SERMON THIS MORNING.
REALLY INSPIRATIONAL.
>> Rev. Putty: YEAH, YOU KNOW,
REALLY INSPIRATIONAL.
>> Rev. Putty: YEAH, YOU KNOW,
EASTER -- IT'S NOT EXACTLY A
>> Rev. Putty: YEAH, YOU KNOW,
EASTER -- IT'S NOT EXACTLY A
BRAINTEASER.
EASTER -- IT'S NOT EXACTLY A
BRAINTEASER.
>> WELL, IT REALLY HELPED ME IN
BRAINTEASER.
>> WELL, IT REALLY HELPED ME IN
MY TIME OF NEED, JUST WHEN I WAS
>> WELL, IT REALLY HELPED ME IN
MY TIME OF NEED, JUST WHEN I WAS
AT THE END OF MY ROPE...
MY TIME OF NEED, JUST WHEN I WAS
AT THE END OF MY ROPE...
>> Rev. Putty: GLAD I COULD
AT THE END OF MY ROPE...
>> Rev. Putty: GLAD I COULD
HELP.
>> Rev. Putty: GLAD I COULD
HELP.
>> ...WHEN ALL SEEMED BLACK.
HELP.
>> ...WHEN ALL SEEMED BLACK.
>> Rev. Putty: YOU'RE WELCOME.
>> ...WHEN ALL SEEMED BLACK.
>> Rev. Putty: YOU'RE WELCOME.
>> LIFE JUST DIDN'T SEEM WORTH
>> Rev. Putty: YOU'RE WELCOME.
>> LIFE JUST DIDN'T SEEM WORTH
LIVING, AND THEN --
>> LIFE JUST DIDN'T SEEM WORTH
LIVING, AND THEN --
>> Rev. Putty: LOOK, YOU WANT AN
LIVING, AND THEN --
>> Rev. Putty: LOOK, YOU WANT AN
AUTOGRAPH?
>> Rev. Putty: LOOK, YOU WANT AN
AUTOGRAPH?
>> NO, I JUST --
AUTOGRAPH?
>> NO, I JUST --
>> Clay: I THINK ROGER WANTS TO
>> NO, I JUST --
>> Clay: I THINK ROGER WANTS TO
TELL US SOMETHING.
>> Clay: I THINK ROGER WANTS TO
TELL US SOMETHING.
>> Rev. Putty: OKAY, I SHOULD
TELL US SOMETHING.
>> Rev. Putty: OKAY, I SHOULD
GET GOING.
>> Rev. Putty: OKAY, I SHOULD
GET GOING.
>> Clay: WHOA!
GET GOING.
>> Clay: WHOA!
YOU'RE NOT GOING ANYWHERE, ANTSY
>> Clay: WHOA!
YOU'RE NOT GOING ANYWHERE, ANTSY
PANTS.
YOU'RE NOT GOING ANYWHERE, ANTSY
PANTS.
>> PLEASE STAY, REVEREND.
PANTS.
>> PLEASE STAY, REVEREND.
I WANT YOU TO HEAR THIS.
>> PLEASE STAY, REVEREND.
I WANT YOU TO HEAR THIS.
>> Rev. Putty: WHY?
I WANT YOU TO HEAR THIS.
>> Rev. Putty: WHY?
I-I GOT NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS.
>> Rev. Putty: WHY?
I-I GOT NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS.
>> YOU'RE A WISE AND BLESSED
I-I GOT NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS.
>> YOU'RE A WISE AND BLESSED
MAN.
>> YOU'RE A WISE AND BLESSED
MAN.
>> Clay: I SECOND THAT -- WISE
MAN.
>> Clay: I SECOND THAT -- WISE
AND BLESSED.
>> Clay: I SECOND THAT -- WISE
AND BLESSED.
PA-POW!
AND BLESSED.
PA-POW!
>> Rev. Putty: STOP THAT!
PA-POW!
>> Rev. Putty: STOP THAT!
LOOK, WHATEVER'S NAGGING YOU,
>> Rev. Putty: STOP THAT!
LOOK, WHATEVER'S NAGGING YOU,
IT'S BOUND TO PASS.
LOOK, WHATEVER'S NAGGING YOU,
IT'S BOUND TO PASS.
>> NO, SHE'S SLEEPING WITH
IT'S BOUND TO PASS.
>> NO, SHE'S SLEEPING WITH
SOMEONE!
>> NO, SHE'S SLEEPING WITH
SOMEONE!
I KNOW IT.
SOMEONE!
I KNOW IT.
IT'S OVER.
I KNOW IT.
IT'S OVER.
OH, MY FLORENCE!
IT'S OVER.
OH, MY FLORENCE!
[ SOBBING ]
OH, MY FLORENCE!
[ SOBBING ]
>> Clay: [ LAUGHS ]
[ SOBBING ]
>> Clay: [ LAUGHS ]
[ Laughing ] YOU PATHETIC
>> Clay: [ LAUGHS ]
[ Laughing ] YOU PATHETIC
BASTARD, LOOK AT YOU.
[ Laughing ] YOU PATHETIC
BASTARD, LOOK AT YOU.
>> HEY, GIVE ME THAT!
BASTARD, LOOK AT YOU.
>> HEY, GIVE ME THAT!
>> Clay: [ Laughing ] YOU CAN'T
>> HEY, GIVE ME THAT!
>> Clay: [ Laughing ] YOU CAN'T
EVEN SCORE A LITTLE TAIL, AND
>> Clay: [ Laughing ] YOU CAN'T
EVEN SCORE A LITTLE TAIL, AND
ALREADY THAT FAT PIG FLORENCE
EVEN SCORE A LITTLE TAIL, AND
ALREADY THAT FAT PIG FLORENCE
HAS GOT SOME LOSER GRUNTING AND
ALREADY THAT FAT PIG FLORENCE
HAS GOT SOME LOSER GRUNTING AND
SNORTING UP AND DOWN HER
HAS GOT SOME LOSER GRUNTING AND
SNORTING UP AND DOWN HER
FLESHY --
SNORTING UP AND DOWN HER
FLESHY --
>> Both: HEY!
FLESHY --
>> Both: HEY!
>> Rev. Putty: THAT'S THE
>> Both: HEY!
>> Rev. Putty: THAT'S THE
OFFICER'S EX-WIFE YOU'RE TALKING
>> Rev. Putty: THAT'S THE
OFFICER'S EX-WIFE YOU'RE TALKING
ABOUT.
OFFICER'S EX-WIFE YOU'RE TALKING
ABOUT.
>> Clay: GOLLY.
ABOUT.
>> Clay: GOLLY.
IMAGINE THE LOSER FLORENCE IS
>> Clay: GOLLY.
IMAGINE THE LOSER FLORENCE IS
GETTING SLOPPY WITH.
IMAGINE THE LOSER FLORENCE IS
GETTING SLOPPY WITH.
>> YOU BETTER STOP THAT.
GETTING SLOPPY WITH.
>> YOU BETTER STOP THAT.
>> Rev. Putty: YEAH, THAT'S NO
>> YOU BETTER STOP THAT.
>> Rev. Putty: YEAH, THAT'S NO
WAY TO TALK ABOUT A GUY YOU
>> Rev. Putty: YEAH, THAT'S NO
WAY TO TALK ABOUT A GUY YOU
DON'T EVEN KNOW.
WAY TO TALK ABOUT A GUY YOU
DON'T EVEN KNOW.
>> WELL, I DON'T CARE ABOUT THE
DON'T EVEN KNOW.
>> WELL, I DON'T CARE ABOUT THE
GUY.
>> WELL, I DON'T CARE ABOUT THE
GUY.
>> Rev. Putty: NO, I MEAN IT'S
GUY.
>> Rev. Putty: NO, I MEAN IT'S
INSULTING TO YOU.
>> Rev. Putty: NO, I MEAN IT'S
INSULTING TO YOU.
>> AND FLORENCE.
INSULTING TO YOU.
>> AND FLORENCE.
>> Rev. Putty: YES, AND YOU.
>> AND FLORENCE.
>> Rev. Putty: YES, AND YOU.
YOU'RE A HANDSOME MAN.
>> Rev. Putty: YES, AND YOU.
YOU'RE A HANDSOME MAN.
I'M SURE THE FELLOW WHO SLEEPS
YOU'RE A HANDSOME MAN.
I'M SURE THE FELLOW WHO SLEEPS
WITH FLORENCE IS AT LEAST AS
I'M SURE THE FELLOW WHO SLEEPS
WITH FLORENCE IS AT LEAST AS
HANDSOME, IF NOT MORE.
WITH FLORENCE IS AT LEAST AS
HANDSOME, IF NOT MORE.
>> YEAH.
HANDSOME, IF NOT MORE.
>> YEAH.
>> Clay: WELL, I THINK JESUS
>> YEAH.
>> Clay: WELL, I THINK JESUS
WOULD SAY YOU'RE BOTH NUTS.
>> Clay: WELL, I THINK JESUS
WOULD SAY YOU'RE BOTH NUTS.
THIS GUY IS PROBABLY SOME
WOULD SAY YOU'RE BOTH NUTS.
THIS GUY IS PROBABLY SOME
HARD-LUCK SAP THAT FEEDS OFF
THIS GUY IS PROBABLY SOME
HARD-LUCK SAP THAT FEEDS OFF
FEMALE DESPERATION AS MUCH AS
HARD-LUCK SAP THAT FEEDS OFF
FEMALE DESPERATION AS MUCH AS
HE'S DESPERATE HIMSELF.
FEMALE DESPERATION AS MUCH AS
HE'S DESPERATE HIMSELF.
[ Laughing ] HEY, FELLAS,
HE'S DESPERATE HIMSELF.
[ Laughing ] HEY, FELLAS,
FELLAS, FELLAS.
[ Laughing ] HEY, FELLAS,
FELLAS, FELLAS.
>> STOP SAYING BAD THINGS ABOUT
FELLAS, FELLAS.
>> STOP SAYING BAD THINGS ABOUT
FLORENCE.
>> STOP SAYING BAD THINGS ABOUT
FLORENCE.
>> Rev. Putty: AND HER LOVER.
FLORENCE.
>> Rev. Putty: AND HER LOVER.
>> All: HEY!
>> Rev. Putty: AND HER LOVER.
>> All: HEY!
>> Clay: KNOCK IT OFF!
>> All: HEY!
>> Clay: KNOCK IT OFF!
>> CLOSE THE DOOR!
>> Clay: KNOCK IT OFF!
>> CLOSE THE DOOR!
>> DR. POTTERSWHEEL, IT'S MY
>> CLOSE THE DOOR!
>> DR. POTTERSWHEEL, IT'S MY
BUSIEST SUNDAY YET.
>> DR. POTTERSWHEEL, IT'S MY
BUSIEST SUNDAY YET.
>> THE USUAL, DOLLY.
BUSIEST SUNDAY YET.
>> THE USUAL, DOLLY.
>> LONG ISLAND ICED TEA COMING
>> THE USUAL, DOLLY.
>> LONG ISLAND ICED TEA COMING
RIGHT UP.
>> LONG ISLAND ICED TEA COMING
RIGHT UP.
>> Clay: WELL, WELL, WELL,
RIGHT UP.
>> Clay: WELL, WELL, WELL,
DR. QUENTIN XAVIER POTTERSWHEEL.
>> Clay: WELL, WELL, WELL,
DR. QUENTIN XAVIER POTTERSWHEEL.
>> CLAY.
DR. QUENTIN XAVIER POTTERSWHEEL.
>> CLAY.
>> Clay: HEY, DOC, WE WERE JUST
>> CLAY.
>> Clay: HEY, DOC, WE WERE JUST
TALKING ABOUT EX-WIVES.
>> Clay: HEY, DOC, WE WERE JUST
TALKING ABOUT EX-WIVES.
>> I'M A WIDOWER.
TALKING ABOUT EX-WIVES.
>> I'M A WIDOWER.
>> Clay: OH, RIGHT. RIGHT.
>> I'M A WIDOWER.
>> Clay: OH, RIGHT. RIGHT.
MUST BE NICE TO LOSE A WIFE TO
>> Clay: OH, RIGHT. RIGHT.
MUST BE NICE TO LOSE A WIFE TO
SICKNESS AND DEATH INSTEAD OF
MUST BE NICE TO LOSE A WIFE TO
SICKNESS AND DEATH INSTEAD OF
HER JUST PLAIN OLD GETTING SICK
SICKNESS AND DEATH INSTEAD OF
HER JUST PLAIN OLD GETTING SICK
OF YOU.
HER JUST PLAIN OLD GETTING SICK
OF YOU.
>> NO, NOT SO NICE, ESPECIALLY
OF YOU.
>> NO, NOT SO NICE, ESPECIALLY
WHEN YOU'RE A DOCTOR.
>> NO, NOT SO NICE, ESPECIALLY
WHEN YOU'RE A DOCTOR.
>> Clay: SHE JUST LOVED THOSE
WHEN YOU'RE A DOCTOR.
>> Clay: SHE JUST LOVED THOSE
PAIN-KILLERS.
>> Clay: SHE JUST LOVED THOSE
PAIN-KILLERS.
PROBABLY DIDN'T EVEN REALIZE SHE
PAIN-KILLERS.
PROBABLY DIDN'T EVEN REALIZE SHE
WAS INFECTED.
PROBABLY DIDN'T EVEN REALIZE SHE
WAS INFECTED.
RIGHT, DOC?
WAS INFECTED.
RIGHT, DOC?
>> SHE WAS QUITE COMFORTABLE
RIGHT, DOC?
>> SHE WAS QUITE COMFORTABLE
WHEN SHE PASSED.
>> SHE WAS QUITE COMFORTABLE
WHEN SHE PASSED.
>> Clay: NUMB, SOME CALL IT.
WHEN SHE PASSED.
>> Clay: NUMB, SOME CALL IT.
NOW, ME AND JESUS, WE LIKE TO
>> Clay: NUMB, SOME CALL IT.
NOW, ME AND JESUS, WE LIKE TO
FEEL THE PAIN.
NOW, ME AND JESUS, WE LIKE TO
FEEL THE PAIN.
TELL ME, DOC, DID SOME OF THOSE
FEEL THE PAIN.
TELL ME, DOC, DID SOME OF THOSE
PAIN-KILLERS PROTECT HER AGAINST
TELL ME, DOC, DID SOME OF THOSE
PAIN-KILLERS PROTECT HER AGAINST
YOU?
PAIN-KILLERS PROTECT HER AGAINST
YOU?
>> WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?
YOU?
>> WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?
>> Clay: YOU KNOW -- THE PAIN OF
>> WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?
>> Clay: YOU KNOW -- THE PAIN OF
YOU, DAY IN, DAY OUT, BEING
>> Clay: YOU KNOW -- THE PAIN OF
YOU, DAY IN, DAY OUT, BEING
THERE WITH THAT FACE, NOT
YOU, DAY IN, DAY OUT, BEING
THERE WITH THAT FACE, NOT
KNOWING WHAT TO SAY, NOT CARING
THERE WITH THAT FACE, NOT
KNOWING WHAT TO SAY, NOT CARING
ANYMORE, NOT EVEN KNOWING THAT
KNOWING WHAT TO SAY, NOT CARING
ANYMORE, NOT EVEN KNOWING THAT
YOU'LL PROBABLY ONLY CARE ABOUT
ANYMORE, NOT EVEN KNOWING THAT
YOU'LL PROBABLY ONLY CARE ABOUT
HER WHEN IT'S FINALLY TOO LATE,
YOU'LL PROBABLY ONLY CARE ABOUT
HER WHEN IT'S FINALLY TOO LATE,
FORGETTING ABOUT ALL THOSE
HER WHEN IT'S FINALLY TOO LATE,
FORGETTING ABOUT ALL THOSE
DESPERATE -- THOSE DESPERATE
FORGETTING ABOUT ALL THOSE
DESPERATE -- THOSE DESPERATE
YEARS YOU SPENT ALONE, YOUR
DESPERATE -- THOSE DESPERATE
YEARS YOU SPENT ALONE, YOUR
BARREN YEARS WHEN NO WOMAN WOULD
YEARS YOU SPENT ALONE, YOUR
BARREN YEARS WHEN NO WOMAN WOULD
EVEN CONSIDER RESTING HER TIRED
BARREN YEARS WHEN NO WOMAN WOULD
EVEN CONSIDER RESTING HER TIRED
HEAD ON YOUR SHAKY LITTLE
EVEN CONSIDER RESTING HER TIRED
HEAD ON YOUR SHAKY LITTLE
SHOULDER AND STINKING OF BELLY
HEAD ON YOUR SHAKY LITTLE
SHOULDER AND STINKING OF BELLY
SEMEN.
SHOULDER AND STINKING OF BELLY
SEMEN.
WHY EVEN WIPE?
SEMEN.
WHY EVEN WIPE?
AND THEN WHEN YOU FINALLY GET
WHY EVEN WIPE?
AND THEN WHEN YOU FINALLY GET
ONE OF THESE...
AND THEN WHEN YOU FINALLY GET
ONE OF THESE...
[ SINGS FANFARE ]
ONE OF THESE...
[ SINGS FANFARE ]
...COVERED IN PIECES OF TAIL
[ SINGS FANFARE ]
...COVERED IN PIECES OF TAIL
THAT HAVE BEEN BUILT UP AS THE
...COVERED IN PIECES OF TAIL
THAT HAVE BEEN BUILT UP AS THE
GRAND TROPHY IN YOUR NOTHING
THAT HAVE BEEN BUILT UP AS THE
GRAND TROPHY IN YOUR NOTHING
LIFE, YOU TRY DESPERATELY TO
GRAND TROPHY IN YOUR NOTHING
LIFE, YOU TRY DESPERATELY TO
KEEP IT -- NOT TO PROTECT IT,
LIFE, YOU TRY DESPERATELY TO
KEEP IT -- NOT TO PROTECT IT,
BUT TO HOARD IT, TO KEEP IT AWAY
KEEP IT -- NOT TO PROTECT IT,
BUT TO HOARD IT, TO KEEP IT AWAY
FROM THE OTHER WOLVES AND
BUT TO HOARD IT, TO KEEP IT AWAY
FROM THE OTHER WOLVES AND
JACKALS CIRCLING YOUR TERRITORY.
FROM THE OTHER WOLVES AND
JACKALS CIRCLING YOUR TERRITORY.
AND YOU REALIZE ALL TOO SOON
JACKALS CIRCLING YOUR TERRITORY.
AND YOU REALIZE ALL TOO SOON
THAT YOU'RE NOT GOOD ENOUGH!
AND YOU REALIZE ALL TOO SOON
THAT YOU'RE NOT GOOD ENOUGH!
AND MAYBE THERE WAS A JERK-OFF
THAT YOU'RE NOT GOOD ENOUGH!
AND MAYBE THERE WAS A JERK-OFF
CALLED DARWIN AFTER ALL AND THAT
AND MAYBE THERE WAS A JERK-OFF
CALLED DARWIN AFTER ALL AND THAT
YOU NEVER ACKNOWLEDGED HIS
CALLED DARWIN AFTER ALL AND THAT
YOU NEVER ACKNOWLEDGED HIS
EXISTENCE BECAUSE YOU KNEW DEEP
YOU NEVER ACKNOWLEDGED HIS
EXISTENCE BECAUSE YOU KNEW DEEP
INSIDE THAT YOU WERE REALLY WHAT
EXISTENCE BECAUSE YOU KNEW DEEP
INSIDE THAT YOU WERE REALLY WHAT
YOU FEARED YOU WERE -- WEAK AND
INSIDE THAT YOU WERE REALLY WHAT
YOU FEARED YOU WERE -- WEAK AND
PASSIVE AND ULTIMATELY BROKEN BY
YOU FEARED YOU WERE -- WEAK AND
PASSIVE AND ULTIMATELY BROKEN BY
THE ONES WHO WERE MADE THE
PASSIVE AND ULTIMATELY BROKEN BY
THE ONES WHO WERE MADE THE
FITTEST.
THE ONES WHO WERE MADE THE
FITTEST.
AND THEN THROUGH YOUR
FITTEST.
AND THEN THROUGH YOUR
WEAKNESSES, YOU BUILT UP A
AND THEN THROUGH YOUR
WEAKNESSES, YOU BUILT UP A
POISON THAT POISONED OTHERS
WEAKNESSES, YOU BUILT UP A
POISON THAT POISONED OTHERS
AROUND YOU...
POISON THAT POISONED OTHERS
AROUND YOU...
[ Sobbing ] ...THAT YOU LOVE.
AROUND YOU...
[ Sobbing ] ...THAT YOU LOVE.
AND THE ONLY TRUE JUSTICE WAS TO
[ Sobbing ] ...THAT YOU LOVE.
AND THE ONLY TRUE JUSTICE WAS TO
LET THOSE DOMINANT JACKALS FEED
AND THE ONLY TRUE JUSTICE WAS TO
LET THOSE DOMINANT JACKALS FEED
ON YOU, SURVIVE OFF YOU.
IF THAT ONE GETS TOO SWEATY, I
GOT AN EXTRA ONE FOR YOU.
>> UH...
GOT AN EXTRA ONE FOR YOU.
>> UH...
>> Clay: AH, COME ON, DOC.
>> UH...
>> Clay: AH, COME ON, DOC.
IT'S A NICE ONE.
>> Clay: AH, COME ON, DOC.
IT'S A NICE ONE.
>> CLAY, MAYBE THE DOCTOR WOULD
IT'S A NICE ONE.
>> CLAY, MAYBE THE DOCTOR WOULD
LIKE TO BE LEFT ALONE.
>> CLAY, MAYBE THE DOCTOR WOULD
LIKE TO BE LEFT ALONE.
>> Clay: OH, IS THAT SO?
LIKE TO BE LEFT ALONE.
>> Clay: OH, IS THAT SO?
WELL, MAYBE YOU WOULD LIKE TO
>> Clay: OH, IS THAT SO?
WELL, MAYBE YOU WOULD LIKE TO
PUT THOSE SLIMY LITTLE BREASTS
WELL, MAYBE YOU WOULD LIKE TO
PUT THOSE SLIMY LITTLE BREASTS
RIGHT IN MY KISSER.
PUT THOSE SLIMY LITTLE BREASTS
RIGHT IN MY KISSER.
OOH, THE LONG ARM OF THE LAW.
RIGHT IN MY KISSER.
OOH, THE LONG ARM OF THE LAW.
>> NO, ROGER.
OOH, THE LONG ARM OF THE LAW.
>> NO, ROGER.
>> Clay: [ Laughing ] YEAH,
>> NO, ROGER.
>> Clay: [ Laughing ] YEAH,
ROGER, LISTEN TO THE WIFE
>> Clay: [ Laughing ] YEAH,
ROGER, LISTEN TO THE WIFE
MURDERER.
ROGER, LISTEN TO THE WIFE
MURDERER.
[ GLASS BREAKS ]
MURDERER.
[ GLASS BREAKS ]
OH. OH. OH. OH.
[ GLASS BREAKS ]
OH. OH. OH. OH.
UH-OH. UH-OH.
OH. OH. OH. OH.
UH-OH. UH-OH.
AW, YOU BETTER GO, TOO, REVS.
UH-OH. UH-OH.
AW, YOU BETTER GO, TOO, REVS.
LET THE MEN HANDLE THIS.
AW, YOU BETTER GO, TOO, REVS.
LET THE MEN HANDLE THIS.
>> Rev. Putty: HOW WOULD YOUR
LET THE MEN HANDLE THIS.
>> Rev. Putty: HOW WOULD YOUR
TEETH LIKE A FIVE-FINGER
>> Rev. Putty: HOW WOULD YOUR
TEETH LIKE A FIVE-FINGER
DISCOUNT ON A KNUCKLE SANDWICH,
TEETH LIKE A FIVE-FINGER
DISCOUNT ON A KNUCKLE SANDWICH,
PUPPINGTON?
DISCOUNT ON A KNUCKLE SANDWICH,
PUPPINGTON?
>> Clay: AHH...
PUPPINGTON?
>> Clay: AHH...
AHH...
>> Clay: AHH...
AHH...
WELL?
AHH...
WELL?
WHAT ARE YOU WAITIN' FOR?
WELL?
WHAT ARE YOU WAITIN' FOR?
I'M WAITIN'.
WHAT ARE YOU WAITIN' FOR?
I'M WAITIN'.
I'M WAITIN'.
I'M WAITIN'.
I'M WAITIN'.
WELL, IT LOOKS LIKE THE ONLY
I'M WAITIN'.
WELL, IT LOOKS LIKE THE ONLY
FISTS THAT ARE RAISED IN THIS
WELL, IT LOOKS LIKE THE ONLY
FISTS THAT ARE RAISED IN THIS
TOWN ARE PACI-FISTS.
FISTS THAT ARE RAISED IN THIS
TOWN ARE PACI-FISTS.
YEAH, RUN.
TOWN ARE PACI-FISTS.
YEAH, RUN.
GET OUT OF HERE.
YEAH, RUN.
GET OUT OF HERE.
GET OUT OF HERE, COWARDS!
GET OUT OF HERE.
GET OUT OF HERE, COWARDS!
LOOK AT YA!
GET OUT OF HERE, COWARDS!
LOOK AT YA!
[ LAUGHS ]
LOOK AT YA!
[ LAUGHS ]
WHERE ARE YOU ALL GOING?
[ LAUGHS ]
WHERE ARE YOU ALL GOING?
GET BACK HERE!
WHERE ARE YOU ALL GOING?
GET BACK HERE!
YOU COME BACK HERE!
GET BACK HERE!
YOU COME BACK HERE!
SHOW ME THAT YOU HAVE ONE OUNCE
YOU COME BACK HERE!
SHOW ME THAT YOU HAVE ONE OUNCE
OF TESTOSTERONE BETWEEN THE
SHOW ME THAT YOU HAVE ONE OUNCE
OF TESTOSTERONE BETWEEN THE
THREE OF YOU!
OF TESTOSTERONE BETWEEN THE
THREE OF YOU!
WITH ALL YOU PEOPLE AS ROLE
THREE OF YOU!
WITH ALL YOU PEOPLE AS ROLE
MODELS, NO WONDER MY SON IS...
WITH ALL YOU PEOPLE AS ROLE
MODELS, NO WONDER MY SON IS...
SENSITIVE.
MODELS, NO WONDER MY SON IS...
SENSITIVE.
>> I'M SUPERGOD!
SENSITIVE.
>> I'M SUPERGOD!
NOW, NOW, AND FOREVER!
>> I'M SUPERGOD!
NOW, NOW, AND FOREVER!
[ TELEPHONE RINGS ]
NOW, NOW, AND FOREVER!
[ TELEPHONE RINGS ]
>> Orel: NO ONE'S THERE.
[ TELEPHONE RINGS ]
>> Orel: NO ONE'S THERE.
GOSH.
>> Orel: NO ONE'S THERE.
GOSH.
>> Bloberta: HANDKERCHIEF.
GOSH.
>> Bloberta: HANDKERCHIEF.
HANDKERCHIEF. HANDKERCHIEF.
>> Bloberta: HANDKERCHIEF.
HANDKERCHIEF. HANDKERCHIEF.
>> Orel: HE'S GOT TO COME HOME
HANDKERCHIEF. HANDKERCHIEF.
>> Orel: HE'S GOT TO COME HOME
ON EASTER AND ALL.
>> Orel: HE'S GOT TO COME HOME
ON EASTER AND ALL.
>> Bloberta: HANDKERCHIEF.
ON EASTER AND ALL.
>> Bloberta: HANDKERCHIEF.
>> Shapey: MOMMY?
>> Bloberta: HANDKERCHIEF.
>> Shapey: MOMMY?
>> Bloberta: NOT NOW, SHAPEY.
>> Shapey: MOMMY?
>> Bloberta: NOT NOW, SHAPEY.
NO MILK.
>> Bloberta: NOT NOW, SHAPEY.
NO MILK.
>> Shapey: WHEN I'M THIRSTY, IT
NO MILK.
>> Shapey: WHEN I'M THIRSTY, IT
FEELS HOW I FEEL WHEN I'M ALONE.
>> Shapey: WHEN I'M THIRSTY, IT
FEELS HOW I FEEL WHEN I'M ALONE.
>> Bloberta: WHAT?
FEELS HOW I FEEL WHEN I'M ALONE.
>> Bloberta: WHAT?
>> Orel: GOLLY.
>> Bloberta: WHAT?
>> Orel: GOLLY.
THINGS SURE HAVE CHANGED AROUND
>> Orel: GOLLY.
THINGS SURE HAVE CHANGED AROUND
HERE.
>> ? YOU SAY IT WOULDN'T WORK ?
? IT WOULDN'T TAKE ?
? IT WOULDN'T TAKE ?
? IT WOULDN'T DO ANY GOOD ?
? IT WOULDN'T DO ANY GOOD ?
? IT WOULDN'T CHANGE A THING ?
? IT WOULDN'T CHANGE A THING ?
? AND I BEING I CAN'T SAY MUCH
? AND I BEING I CAN'T SAY MUCH
TO DENY IT ?
TO DENY IT ?
? BUT I'M STUCK WITH AN URGE ?
? BUT I'M STUCK WITH AN URGE ?
? TO ONLY HAVE TRIED IT ?
? TO ONLY HAVE TRIED IT ?
? YOU SAY IT WOULDN'T DO ?
? YOU SAY IT WOULDN'T DO ?
? IT WOULDN'T SHAKE ?
? IT WOULDN'T SHAKE ?
? IT WOULDN'T MAKE ANY WAVES ?
? IT WOULDN'T MAKE ANY WAVES ?
? IT WOULDN'T BE NO USE ?
? IT WOULDN'T BE NO USE ?
? AND YOU BEING YOU, YOU KNOW
? AND YOU BEING YOU, YOU KNOW
SURE HOW TO PHRASE IT ?
[ SIGHS ]
>> AAAAAAH!
[ SIGHS ]
>> AAAAAAH!
>> Clay: [ GROANS ]
>> AAAAAAH!
>> Clay: [ GROANS ]
MY LIFE.
>> Clay: [ GROANS ]
MY LIFE.
>> Shapey: YUMMY!
MY LIFE.
>> Shapey: YUMMY!
>> Clay: YUMMY.
>> Shapey: YUMMY!
>> Clay: YUMMY.
>> OOH, FRIEND.
>> Clay: YUMMY.
>> OOH, FRIEND.
>> Clay: HUH?
>> OOH, FRIEND.
>> Clay: HUH?
HMM.
>> Clay: HUH?
HMM.
>> YAY, BIRDIE!
HMM.
>> YAY, BIRDIE!
>> Clay: [ MURMURS ]
>> YAY, BIRDIE!
>> Clay: [ MURMURS ]
[ GROANS ]
>> Clay: [ MURMURS ]
[ GROANS ]
WATCH, UH...
[ GROANS ]
WATCH, UH...
>> Bloberta: IF MEN MARRED MEN
WATCH, UH...
>> Bloberta: IF MEN MARRED MEN
AND WOMEN MARRED WOMEN, WE'D ALL
>> Bloberta: IF MEN MARRED MEN
AND WOMEN MARRED WOMEN, WE'D ALL
GIVE BIRTH TO NOTHING BUT
AND WOMEN MARRED WOMEN, WE'D ALL
GIVE BIRTH TO NOTHING BUT
FAIRYSEXUALS.
GIVE BIRTH TO NOTHING BUT
FAIRYSEXUALS.
>> Orel: BUT WHY DID YOU MARRY
FAIRYSEXUALS.
>> Orel: BUT WHY DID YOU MARRY
DAD?
>> Orel: BUT WHY DID YOU MARRY
DAD?
>> Clay: HUH?
DAD?
>> Clay: HUH?
>> Bloberta: OH, WELL...
>> Clay: HUH?
>> Bloberta: OH, WELL...
[ GIGGLES ]
>> Bloberta: OH, WELL...
[ GIGGLES ]
WHY NOT?
>> Orel: W-WELL, IT'S JUST THAT
W-WHEN HE DRINKS, HE CHANGES.
>> Rev. Putty: HAPPY EASTER.
W-WHEN HE DRINKS, HE CHANGES.
>> Rev. Putty: HAPPY EASTER.
BY THE LOOK OF ALL YOUR PATHETIC
>> Rev. Putty: HAPPY EASTER.
BY THE LOOK OF ALL YOUR PATHETIC
MUGS, I'D SAY YOU ALL HAD AS
BY THE LOOK OF ALL YOUR PATHETIC
MUGS, I'D SAY YOU ALL HAD AS
GOOD A WEEK AS I HAD.
>> THESE ARE MY ZEBRAS.
>> Rev. Putty: OH, FLORENCE.
>> [ GIGGLING ]
>> Rev. Putty: OH, FLORENCE.
>> [ GIGGLING ]
>> Rev. Putty: OH, GOD.
>> [ GIGGLING ]
>> Rev. Putty: OH, GOD.
OH, GOD!
>> Rev. Putty: OH, GOD.
OH, GOD!
DOTTIE!
OH, GOD!
DOTTIE!
>> [ SOBBING ]
DOTTIE!
>> [ SOBBING ]
WELL, IF YOU REMEMBER LAST
>> [ SOBBING ]
WELL, IF YOU REMEMBER LAST
WEEK'S SERMON, I ENDED IT WITH A
WELL, IF YOU REMEMBER LAST
WEEK'S SERMON, I ENDED IT WITH A
LITTLE CLIFF-HANGER.
WEEK'S SERMON, I ENDED IT WITH A
LITTLE CLIFF-HANGER.
WHAT WAS IN THE TOMB WHEN
LITTLE CLIFF-HANGER.
WHAT WAS IN THE TOMB WHEN
MARY MAGDALENE AND COMPANY
WHAT WAS IN THE TOMB WHEN
MARY MAGDALENE AND COMPANY
CHECKED IT OUT?
MARY MAGDALENE AND COMPANY
CHECKED IT OUT?
WELL, HERE'S THE ANSWER.
CHECKED IT OUT?
WELL, HERE'S THE ANSWER.
NOTHING.
WELL, HERE'S THE ANSWER.
NOTHING.
NOTHING WAS IN THE TOMB.
NOTHING.
NOTHING WAS IN THE TOMB.
NOW, USUALLY NOTHING IS A
NOTHING WAS IN THE TOMB.
NOW, USUALLY NOTHING IS A
DOWNER -- ONE BIG GOOSE EGG.
NOW, USUALLY NOTHING IS A
DOWNER -- ONE BIG GOOSE EGG.
WELL, THIS TIME, THE GOOSE LAID
DOWNER -- ONE BIG GOOSE EGG.
WELL, THIS TIME, THE GOOSE LAID
A GOLDEN EGG, PEOPLE.
WELL, THIS TIME, THE GOOSE LAID
A GOLDEN EGG, PEOPLE.
NOTHING MEANT HOPE FOR EVERYONE.
A GOLDEN EGG, PEOPLE.
NOTHING MEANT HOPE FOR EVERYONE.
SO THE NEXT TIME YOU LOOK AND
NOTHING MEANT HOPE FOR EVERYONE.
SO THE NEXT TIME YOU LOOK AND
SEE NOTHING, HAVE A LITTLE HOPE,
SO THE NEXT TIME YOU LOOK AND
SEE NOTHING, HAVE A LITTLE HOPE,
WILL YOU?
SEE NOTHING, HAVE A LITTLE HOPE,
WILL YOU?
FOR ME.
WILL YOU?
FOR ME.
AMEN.
FOR ME.
AMEN.
[ BIRDS CHIRPING ]
AMEN.
[ BIRDS CHIRPING ]
>> Orel: REVEREND PUTTY, I AGREE
[ BIRDS CHIRPING ]
>> Orel: REVEREND PUTTY, I AGREE
WITH YOU THAT...
>> Orel: REVEREND PUTTY, I AGREE
WITH YOU THAT...
OH.
WITH YOU THAT...
OH.
>> WHERE DID HE GO?
OH.
>> WHERE DID HE GO?
WHERE'D HE GO?
>> WHERE DID HE GO?
WHERE'D HE GO?
>> Clay: COME ON!
WHERE'D HE GO?
>> Clay: COME ON!
>> HI, CLAY.
>> Clay: COME ON!
>> HI, CLAY.
>> Clay: WHAT IS IT -- A
>> HI, CLAY.
>> Clay: WHAT IS IT -- A
HOLIDAY, DOLLY?
>> Clay: WHAT IS IT -- A
HOLIDAY, DOLLY?
>> EASTER GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU?
HOLIDAY, DOLLY?
>> EASTER GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU?
>> Clay: OH, RIGHT.
>> EASTER GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU?
>> Clay: OH, RIGHT.
>> MISSED YOU THE LAST FEW DAYS.
>> Clay: OH, RIGHT.
>> MISSED YOU THE LAST FEW DAYS.
>> Clay: YEAH.
>> MISSED YOU THE LAST FEW DAYS.
>> Clay: YEAH.
TOOK THE KID ON A HUNTING TRIP.
>> Clay: YEAH.
TOOK THE KID ON A HUNTING TRIP.
>> OREL?
TOOK THE KID ON A HUNTING TRIP.
>> OREL?
HE DIDN'T KILL ANYTHING, DID HE?
>> OREL?
HE DIDN'T KILL ANYTHING, DID HE?
>> Clay: LOOK, EVERYTHING WENT
HE DIDN'T KILL ANYTHING, DID HE?
>> Clay: LOOK, EVERYTHING WENT
LIKE CLOCKWORK.
>> Clay: LOOK, EVERYTHING WENT
LIKE CLOCKWORK.
WE WERE FATHER AND SON, GOT SOME
LIKE CLOCKWORK.
WE WERE FATHER AND SON, GOT SOME
FRESH AIR, THINGS DIED, CAME
WE WERE FATHER AND SON, GOT SOME
FRESH AIR, THINGS DIED, CAME
HOME.
FRESH AIR, THINGS DIED, CAME
HOME.
GET OFF MY BACK.
HOME.
GET OFF MY BACK.
>> FORGHETTY'S.
GET OFF MY BACK.
>> FORGHETTY'S.
CLAY, IT'S THE OFFICE.
>> FORGHETTY'S.
CLAY, IT'S THE OFFICE.
>> Clay: TELL THEM IT'S EASTER.
CLAY, IT'S THE OFFICE.
>> Clay: TELL THEM IT'S EASTER.
AND I'M NOT HERE!
>> Clay: TELL THEM IT'S EASTER.
AND I'M NOT HERE!
OH, AND TELL THEM THEY NEED TO
AND I'M NOT HERE!
OH, AND TELL THEM THEY NEED TO
ORDER MORE PAPERWEIGHTS!
OH, AND TELL THEM THEY NEED TO
ORDER MORE PAPERWEIGHTS!
>> YEAH, DID YOU HEAR THAT?
ORDER MORE PAPERWEIGHTS!
>> YEAH, DID YOU HEAR THAT?
[ Laughing ] OKAY.
>> YEAH, DID YOU HEAR THAT?
[ Laughing ] OKAY.
>> Clay: DON'T LOOK AT ME LIKE
[ Laughing ] OKAY.
>> Clay: DON'T LOOK AT ME LIKE
THAT.
>> Clay: DON'T LOOK AT ME LIKE
THAT.
I'M VERY RESPONSIBLE.
THAT.
I'M VERY RESPONSIBLE.
>> USUALLY.
I'M VERY RESPONSIBLE.
>> USUALLY.
>> Clay: DOLLY, IF I GO TO WORK
>> USUALLY.
>> Clay: DOLLY, IF I GO TO WORK
TODAY, I'M GONNA KILL SOMEBODY.
>> Clay: DOLLY, IF I GO TO WORK
TODAY, I'M GONNA KILL SOMEBODY.
>> I SEE.
TODAY, I'M GONNA KILL SOMEBODY.
>> I SEE.
WELL, AT LEAST YOU PUT IN THAT
>> I SEE.
WELL, AT LEAST YOU PUT IN THAT
PAPERWEIGHT ORDER.
WELL, AT LEAST YOU PUT IN THAT
PAPERWEIGHT ORDER.
>> Clay: IT WON'T BE ENOUGH!
PAPERWEIGHT ORDER.
>> Clay: IT WON'T BE ENOUGH!
THEY NEVER GET ENOUGH.
>> Clay: IT WON'T BE ENOUGH!
THEY NEVER GET ENOUGH.
ALWAYS SO MUCH MORE PAPER THAN
THEY NEVER GET ENOUGH.
ALWAYS SO MUCH MORE PAPER THAN
THERE ARE WEIGHTS.
ALWAYS SO MUCH MORE PAPER THAN
THERE ARE WEIGHTS.
YOU KNOW HOW MUCH PAPERWORK I
THERE ARE WEIGHTS.
YOU KNOW HOW MUCH PAPERWORK I
HAVE?
YOU KNOW HOW MUCH PAPERWORK I
HAVE?
IT NEVER STOPS!
HAVE?
IT NEVER STOPS!
I DON'T KNOW HOW IT HAPPENS.
IT NEVER STOPS!
I DON'T KNOW HOW IT HAPPENS.
YOU START OUT IN LIFE AS A
I DON'T KNOW HOW IT HAPPENS.
YOU START OUT IN LIFE AS A
LITTLE BABY --
YOU START OUT IN LIFE AS A
LITTLE BABY --
>> UH-HUH. NO PAPERWORK.
LITTLE BABY --
>> UH-HUH. NO PAPERWORK.
>> Clay: EXACTLY. NO PAPERWORK.
>> UH-HUH. NO PAPERWORK.
>> Clay: EXACTLY. NO PAPERWORK.
BUT DO WE APPRECIATE IT, ALL US
>> Clay: EXACTLY. NO PAPERWORK.
BUT DO WE APPRECIATE IT, ALL US
LITTLE BABIES?
BUT DO WE APPRECIATE IT, ALL US
LITTLE BABIES?
NO, WE CRY, CRY, CRY, CRY, CRY,
LITTLE BABIES?
NO, WE CRY, CRY, CRY, CRY, CRY,
CRY, CRY, CRY, CRY, CRY, CRY,
NO, WE CRY, CRY, CRY, CRY, CRY,
CRY, CRY, CRY, CRY, CRY, CRY,
CRY, CRY, CRY.
CRY, CRY, CRY, CRY, CRY, CRY,
CRY, CRY, CRY.
>> WELL, I GUESS WHEN YOU HAVE A
CRY, CRY, CRY.
>> WELL, I GUESS WHEN YOU HAVE A
FAMILY, THAT'S THE SACRIFICE YOU
>> WELL, I GUESS WHEN YOU HAVE A
FAMILY, THAT'S THE SACRIFICE YOU
MAKE.
FAMILY, THAT'S THE SACRIFICE YOU
MAKE.
>> Clay: SACRIFICE -- EXACTLY.
MAKE.
>> Clay: SACRIFICE -- EXACTLY.
I SACRIFICED THE ULTIMATE
>> Clay: SACRIFICE -- EXACTLY.
I SACRIFICED THE ULTIMATE
SACRIFICE -- MY HAPPINESS FOR MY
I SACRIFICED THE ULTIMATE
SACRIFICE -- MY HAPPINESS FOR MY
KIDS.
SACRIFICE -- MY HAPPINESS FOR MY
KIDS.
YOU BET I DID!
KIDS.
YOU BET I DID!
YOU...BET...I...DID.
YOU BET I DID!
YOU...BET...I...DID.
AND I'D DO IT AGAIN, TOO.
YOU...BET...I...DID.
AND I'D DO IT AGAIN, TOO.
I'D DO IT OVER AND OVER AGAIN.
AND I'D DO IT AGAIN, TOO.
I'D DO IT OVER AND OVER AGAIN.
THAT'S MY LIFE -- OVER AND OVER
I'D DO IT OVER AND OVER AGAIN.
THAT'S MY LIFE -- OVER AND OVER
AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND
THAT'S MY LIFE -- OVER AND OVER
AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND
OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER
AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND
OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER
AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND
OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER
AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND
OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER
AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND
OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER
AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND
OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER
AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND
OVER...
AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND
OVER...
>> OKAY, CLAY. I GET THE POINT.
OVER...
>> OKAY, CLAY. I GET THE POINT.
>> Clay: NO, YOU DON'T!
>> OKAY, CLAY. I GET THE POINT.
>> Clay: NO, YOU DON'T!
AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND
>> Clay: NO, YOU DON'T!
AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND
OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER
AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND
OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER
AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND
OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER
AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND
OVER AND --
AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND
OVER AND --
>> Rev. Putty: IT'S OVER!
OVER AND --
>> Rev. Putty: IT'S OVER!
>> Clay: OH, THE DOOR!
>> Rev. Putty: IT'S OVER!
>> Clay: OH, THE DOOR!
>> Rev. Putty: OH.
>> Clay: OH, THE DOOR!
>> Rev. Putty: OH.
>> HOWDY, REVEREND.
>> Rev. Putty: OH.
>> HOWDY, REVEREND.
>> Rev. Putty: YEAH, BACK AT
>> HOWDY, REVEREND.
>> Rev. Putty: YEAH, BACK AT
YOU.
>> Rev. Putty: YEAH, BACK AT
YOU.
>> Clay: THE REVEREND PUTTY.
YOU.
>> Clay: THE REVEREND PUTTY.
I DO BELIEVE THAT WAS THE
>> Clay: THE REVEREND PUTTY.
I DO BELIEVE THAT WAS THE
EX-MRS. PAPERMOUTH, HMM?
I DO BELIEVE THAT WAS THE
EX-MRS. PAPERMOUTH, HMM?
>> Rev. Putty: MM. SEVEN/SEVEN.
EX-MRS. PAPERMOUTH, HMM?
>> Rev. Putty: MM. SEVEN/SEVEN.
>> WELL, I CERTAINLY DIDN'T
>> Rev. Putty: MM. SEVEN/SEVEN.
>> WELL, I CERTAINLY DIDN'T
EXPECT TO BE KEPT COMPANY BY TWO
>> WELL, I CERTAINLY DIDN'T
EXPECT TO BE KEPT COMPANY BY TWO
HANDSOME GENTLEMEN TODAY.
EXPECT TO BE KEPT COMPANY BY TWO
HANDSOME GENTLEMEN TODAY.
>> Rev. Putty: YEAH, KEEP IT IN
HANDSOME GENTLEMEN TODAY.
>> Rev. Putty: YEAH, KEEP IT IN
YOUR PANTS.
>> Rev. Putty: YEAH, KEEP IT IN
YOUR PANTS.
I'M THROUGH WITH WOMEN.
YOUR PANTS.
I'M THROUGH WITH WOMEN.
>> Clay: AMEN.
I'M THROUGH WITH WOMEN.
>> Clay: AMEN.
>> YOU'RE THROUGH WITH WOMEN,
>> Clay: AMEN.
>> YOU'RE THROUGH WITH WOMEN,
REVEREND?
>> YOU'RE THROUGH WITH WOMEN,
REVEREND?
>> Rev. Putty: YEAH.
REVEREND?
>> Rev. Putty: YEAH.
WELL, EVEN THOUGH I'M A
>> Rev. Putty: YEAH.
WELL, EVEN THOUGH I'M A
PROTESTANT MAN OF THE CLOTH, I
WELL, EVEN THOUGH I'M A
PROTESTANT MAN OF THE CLOTH, I
STILL FIGURE I SHOULD MAKE SOME
PROTESTANT MAN OF THE CLOTH, I
STILL FIGURE I SHOULD MAKE SOME
SORT OF --
STILL FIGURE I SHOULD MAKE SOME
SORT OF --
>> Clay: SACRIFICE?
SORT OF --
>> Clay: SACRIFICE?
>> Rev. Putty: YEAH, THAT'S THE
>> Clay: SACRIFICE?
>> Rev. Putty: YEAH, THAT'S THE
WORD.
>> Rev. Putty: YEAH, THAT'S THE
WORD.
>> Clay: WELL, GET IN LINE,
WORD.
>> Clay: WELL, GET IN LINE,
BUDDY.
>> Clay: WELL, GET IN LINE,
BUDDY.
>> WELL, THE REVEREND
BUDDY.
>> WELL, THE REVEREND
SACRIFICING IS VERY FITTING ON A
>> WELL, THE REVEREND
SACRIFICING IS VERY FITTING ON A
DAY LIKE TODAY.
SACRIFICING IS VERY FITTING ON A
DAY LIKE TODAY.
>> Clay: OH, REALLY?
DAY LIKE TODAY.
>> Clay: OH, REALLY?
WHY ESPECIALLY TODAY,
>> Clay: OH, REALLY?
WHY ESPECIALLY TODAY,
ALBERT VAGINASTEIN?
WHY ESPECIALLY TODAY,
ALBERT VAGINASTEIN?
>> EASTER -- THE REVEREND'S
ALBERT VAGINASTEIN?
>> EASTER -- THE REVEREND'S
SACRIFICING LIKE OUR LORD HAS
>> EASTER -- THE REVEREND'S
SACRIFICING LIKE OUR LORD HAS
SACRIFICED.
SACRIFICING LIKE OUR LORD HAS
SACRIFICED.
RIGHT, REVEREND?
SACRIFICED.
RIGHT, REVEREND?
>> Rev. Putty: YES.
RIGHT, REVEREND?
>> Rev. Putty: YES.
>> Clay: DON'T GET ME WRONG.
>> Rev. Putty: YES.
>> Clay: DON'T GET ME WRONG.
JESUS WAS NICE, BUT THE GUY HAD
>> Clay: DON'T GET ME WRONG.
JESUS WAS NICE, BUT THE GUY HAD
EVERYTHING.
JESUS WAS NICE, BUT THE GUY HAD
EVERYTHING.
HE KNEW HE WAS THE SON OF GOD.
EVERYTHING.
HE KNEW HE WAS THE SON OF GOD.
YOU CAN'T GET MORE PRIVILEGED
HE KNEW HE WAS THE SON OF GOD.
YOU CAN'T GET MORE PRIVILEGED
THAN THAT.
YOU CAN'T GET MORE PRIVILEGED
THAN THAT.
>> Rev. Putty: LOOK, YOU TRY
THAN THAT.
>> Rev. Putty: LOOK, YOU TRY
GETTING CRUCIFIED!
>> Rev. Putty: LOOK, YOU TRY
GETTING CRUCIFIED!
>> Clay: MAYBE I WILL, IF I HAVE
GETTING CRUCIFIED!
>> Clay: MAYBE I WILL, IF I HAVE
THE TIME!
>> Clay: MAYBE I WILL, IF I HAVE
THE TIME!
I'M A LITTLE BUSY DOING SOME
THE TIME!
I'M A LITTLE BUSY DOING SOME
REAL SACRIFICING, THANK YOU VERY
I'M A LITTLE BUSY DOING SOME
REAL SACRIFICING, THANK YOU VERY
MUCH.
REAL SACRIFICING, THANK YOU VERY
MUCH.
>> Rev. Putty: OH, CRUCIFIXION
MUCH.
>> Rev. Putty: OH, CRUCIFIXION
ISN'T ENOUGH OF A SACRIFICE FOR
>> Rev. Putty: OH, CRUCIFIXION
ISN'T ENOUGH OF A SACRIFICE FOR
YOU?
ISN'T ENOUGH OF A SACRIFICE FOR
YOU?
>> Clay: LOOK, ONCE YOU GET
YOU?
>> Clay: LOOK, ONCE YOU GET
CRUCIFIED, YOU CAN DO NO WRONG!
>> Clay: LOOK, ONCE YOU GET
CRUCIFIED, YOU CAN DO NO WRONG!
EVERYBODY LOVES YOU!
CRUCIFIED, YOU CAN DO NO WRONG!
EVERYBODY LOVES YOU!
WELL, SOME OF US DON'T HAVE THAT
EVERYBODY LOVES YOU!
WELL, SOME OF US DON'T HAVE THAT
LUXURY.
WELL, SOME OF US DON'T HAVE THAT
LUXURY.
THERE'S A LITTLE THING CALLED
LUXURY.
THERE'S A LITTLE THING CALLED
SUPPORTING A FAMILY THAT JESUS
THERE'S A LITTLE THING CALLED
SUPPORTING A FAMILY THAT JESUS
NEVER GOT AROUND TO DOING.
SUPPORTING A FAMILY THAT JESUS
NEVER GOT AROUND TO DOING.
>> Rev. Putty: YOU'RE AMAZING.
NEVER GOT AROUND TO DOING.
>> Rev. Putty: YOU'RE AMAZING.
THE BEER GOGGLES YOU HAVE ON
>> Rev. Putty: YOU'RE AMAZING.
THE BEER GOGGLES YOU HAVE ON
RIGHT NOW ARE MAKING CRUCIFIXION
THE BEER GOGGLES YOU HAVE ON
RIGHT NOW ARE MAKING CRUCIFIXION
LOOK LIKE MARILYN MONROE.
RIGHT NOW ARE MAKING CRUCIFIXION
LOOK LIKE MARILYN MONROE.
>> Clay: I NEVER DRINK BEER.
LOOK LIKE MARILYN MONROE.
>> Clay: I NEVER DRINK BEER.
>> Rev. Putty: CLOSE THE DOOR!
>> Clay: I NEVER DRINK BEER.
>> Rev. Putty: CLOSE THE DOOR!
>> OH, HELLO.
>> Rev. Putty: CLOSE THE DOOR!
>> OH, HELLO.
>> Clay: UH-OH.
>> OH, HELLO.
>> Clay: UH-OH.
HOLD ON TO YOUR YAWNS, EVERYONE.
>> Clay: UH-OH.
HOLD ON TO YOUR YAWNS, EVERYONE.
IT'S OFFICER EXCITEMENT!
HOLD ON TO YOUR YAWNS, EVERYONE.
IT'S OFFICER EXCITEMENT!
>> REVEREND, I FINALLY GOT TO
IT'S OFFICER EXCITEMENT!
>> REVEREND, I FINALLY GOT TO
GET THE DAY OFF AND HEAR YOUR
>> REVEREND, I FINALLY GOT TO
GET THE DAY OFF AND HEAR YOUR
SERMON THIS MORNING.
GET THE DAY OFF AND HEAR YOUR
SERMON THIS MORNING.
REALLY INSPIRATIONAL.
SERMON THIS MORNING.
REALLY INSPIRATIONAL.
>> Rev. Putty: YEAH, YOU KNOW,
REALLY INSPIRATIONAL.
>> Rev. Putty: YEAH, YOU KNOW,
EASTER -- IT'S NOT EXACTLY A
>> Rev. Putty: YEAH, YOU KNOW,
EASTER -- IT'S NOT EXACTLY A
BRAINTEASER.
EASTER -- IT'S NOT EXACTLY A
BRAINTEASER.
>> WELL, IT REALLY HELPED ME IN
BRAINTEASER.
>> WELL, IT REALLY HELPED ME IN
MY TIME OF NEED, JUST WHEN I WAS
>> WELL, IT REALLY HELPED ME IN
MY TIME OF NEED, JUST WHEN I WAS
AT THE END OF MY ROPE...
MY TIME OF NEED, JUST WHEN I WAS
AT THE END OF MY ROPE...
>> Rev. Putty: GLAD I COULD
AT THE END OF MY ROPE...
>> Rev. Putty: GLAD I COULD
HELP.
>> Rev. Putty: GLAD I COULD
HELP.
>> ...WHEN ALL SEEMED BLACK.
HELP.
>> ...WHEN ALL SEEMED BLACK.
>> Rev. Putty: YOU'RE WELCOME.
>> ...WHEN ALL SEEMED BLACK.
>> Rev. Putty: YOU'RE WELCOME.
>> LIFE JUST DIDN'T SEEM WORTH
>> Rev. Putty: YOU'RE WELCOME.
>> LIFE JUST DIDN'T SEEM WORTH
LIVING, AND THEN --
>> LIFE JUST DIDN'T SEEM WORTH
LIVING, AND THEN --
>> Rev. Putty: LOOK, YOU WANT AN
LIVING, AND THEN --
>> Rev. Putty: LOOK, YOU WANT AN
AUTOGRAPH?
>> Rev. Putty: LOOK, YOU WANT AN
AUTOGRAPH?
>> NO, I JUST --
AUTOGRAPH?
>> NO, I JUST --
>> Clay: I THINK ROGER WANTS TO
>> NO, I JUST --
>> Clay: I THINK ROGER WANTS TO
TELL US SOMETHING.
>> Clay: I THINK ROGER WANTS TO
TELL US SOMETHING.
>> Rev. Putty: OKAY, I SHOULD
TELL US SOMETHING.
>> Rev. Putty: OKAY, I SHOULD
GET GOING.
>> Rev. Putty: OKAY, I SHOULD
GET GOING.
>> Clay: WHOA!
GET GOING.
>> Clay: WHOA!
YOU'RE NOT GOING ANYWHERE, ANTSY
>> Clay: WHOA!
YOU'RE NOT GOING ANYWHERE, ANTSY
PANTS.
YOU'RE NOT GOING ANYWHERE, ANTSY
PANTS.
>> PLEASE STAY, REVEREND.
PANTS.
>> PLEASE STAY, REVEREND.
I WANT YOU TO HEAR THIS.
>> PLEASE STAY, REVEREND.
I WANT YOU TO HEAR THIS.
>> Rev. Putty: WHY?
I WANT YOU TO HEAR THIS.
>> Rev. Putty: WHY?
I-I GOT NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS.
>> Rev. Putty: WHY?
I-I GOT NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS.
>> YOU'RE A WISE AND BLESSED
I-I GOT NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS.
>> YOU'RE A WISE AND BLESSED
MAN.
>> YOU'RE A WISE AND BLESSED
MAN.
>> Clay: I SECOND THAT -- WISE
MAN.
>> Clay: I SECOND THAT -- WISE
AND BLESSED.
>> Clay: I SECOND THAT -- WISE
AND BLESSED.
PA-POW!
AND BLESSED.
PA-POW!
>> Rev. Putty: STOP THAT!
PA-POW!
>> Rev. Putty: STOP THAT!
LOOK, WHATEVER'S NAGGING YOU,
>> Rev. Putty: STOP THAT!
LOOK, WHATEVER'S NAGGING YOU,
IT'S BOUND TO PASS.
LOOK, WHATEVER'S NAGGING YOU,
IT'S BOUND TO PASS.
>> NO, SHE'S SLEEPING WITH
IT'S BOUND TO PASS.
>> NO, SHE'S SLEEPING WITH
SOMEONE!
>> NO, SHE'S SLEEPING WITH
SOMEONE!
I KNOW IT.
SOMEONE!
I KNOW IT.
IT'S OVER.
I KNOW IT.
IT'S OVER.
OH, MY FLORENCE!
IT'S OVER.
OH, MY FLORENCE!
[ SOBBING ]
OH, MY FLORENCE!
[ SOBBING ]
>> Clay: [ LAUGHS ]
[ SOBBING ]
>> Clay: [ LAUGHS ]
[ Laughing ] YOU PATHETIC
>> Clay: [ LAUGHS ]
[ Laughing ] YOU PATHETIC
BASTARD, LOOK AT YOU.
[ Laughing ] YOU PATHETIC
BASTARD, LOOK AT YOU.
>> HEY, GIVE ME THAT!
BASTARD, LOOK AT YOU.
>> HEY, GIVE ME THAT!
>> Clay: [ Laughing ] YOU CAN'T
>> HEY, GIVE ME THAT!
>> Clay: [ Laughing ] YOU CAN'T
EVEN SCORE A LITTLE TAIL, AND
>> Clay: [ Laughing ] YOU CAN'T
EVEN SCORE A LITTLE TAIL, AND
ALREADY THAT FAT PIG FLORENCE
EVEN SCORE A LITTLE TAIL, AND
ALREADY THAT FAT PIG FLORENCE
HAS GOT SOME LOSER GRUNTING AND
ALREADY THAT FAT PIG FLORENCE
HAS GOT SOME LOSER GRUNTING AND
SNORTING UP AND DOWN HER
HAS GOT SOME LOSER GRUNTING AND
SNORTING UP AND DOWN HER
FLESHY --
SNORTING UP AND DOWN HER
FLESHY --
>> Both: HEY!
FLESHY --
>> Both: HEY!
>> Rev. Putty: THAT'S THE
>> Both: HEY!
>> Rev. Putty: THAT'S THE
OFFICER'S EX-WIFE YOU'RE TALKING
>> Rev. Putty: THAT'S THE
OFFICER'S EX-WIFE YOU'RE TALKING
ABOUT.
OFFICER'S EX-WIFE YOU'RE TALKING
ABOUT.
>> Clay: GOLLY.
ABOUT.
>> Clay: GOLLY.
IMAGINE THE LOSER FLORENCE IS
>> Clay: GOLLY.
IMAGINE THE LOSER FLORENCE IS
GETTING SLOPPY WITH.
IMAGINE THE LOSER FLORENCE IS
GETTING SLOPPY WITH.
>> YOU BETTER STOP THAT.
GETTING SLOPPY WITH.
>> YOU BETTER STOP THAT.
>> Rev. Putty: YEAH, THAT'S NO
>> YOU BETTER STOP THAT.
>> Rev. Putty: YEAH, THAT'S NO
WAY TO TALK ABOUT A GUY YOU
>> Rev. Putty: YEAH, THAT'S NO
WAY TO TALK ABOUT A GUY YOU
DON'T EVEN KNOW.
WAY TO TALK ABOUT A GUY YOU
DON'T EVEN KNOW.
>> WELL, I DON'T CARE ABOUT THE
DON'T EVEN KNOW.
>> WELL, I DON'T CARE ABOUT THE
GUY.
>> WELL, I DON'T CARE ABOUT THE
GUY.
>> Rev. Putty: NO, I MEAN IT'S
GUY.
>> Rev. Putty: NO, I MEAN IT'S
INSULTING TO YOU.
>> Rev. Putty: NO, I MEAN IT'S
INSULTING TO YOU.
>> AND FLORENCE.
INSULTING TO YOU.
>> AND FLORENCE.
>> Rev. Putty: YES, AND YOU.
>> AND FLORENCE.
>> Rev. Putty: YES, AND YOU.
YOU'RE A HANDSOME MAN.
>> Rev. Putty: YES, AND YOU.
YOU'RE A HANDSOME MAN.
I'M SURE THE FELLOW WHO SLEEPS
YOU'RE A HANDSOME MAN.
I'M SURE THE FELLOW WHO SLEEPS
WITH FLORENCE IS AT LEAST AS
I'M SURE THE FELLOW WHO SLEEPS
WITH FLORENCE IS AT LEAST AS
HANDSOME, IF NOT MORE.
WITH FLORENCE IS AT LEAST AS
HANDSOME, IF NOT MORE.
>> YEAH.
HANDSOME, IF NOT MORE.
>> YEAH.
>> Clay: WELL, I THINK JESUS
>> YEAH.
>> Clay: WELL, I THINK JESUS
WOULD SAY YOU'RE BOTH NUTS.
>> Clay: WELL, I THINK JESUS
WOULD SAY YOU'RE BOTH NUTS.
THIS GUY IS PROBABLY SOME
WOULD SAY YOU'RE BOTH NUTS.
THIS GUY IS PROBABLY SOME
HARD-LUCK SAP THAT FEEDS OFF
THIS GUY IS PROBABLY SOME
HARD-LUCK SAP THAT FEEDS OFF
FEMALE DESPERATION AS MUCH AS
HARD-LUCK SAP THAT FEEDS OFF
FEMALE DESPERATION AS MUCH AS
HE'S DESPERATE HIMSELF.
FEMALE DESPERATION AS MUCH AS
HE'S DESPERATE HIMSELF.
[ Laughing ] HEY, FELLAS,
HE'S DESPERATE HIMSELF.
[ Laughing ] HEY, FELLAS,
FELLAS, FELLAS.
[ Laughing ] HEY, FELLAS,
FELLAS, FELLAS.
>> STOP SAYING BAD THINGS ABOUT
FELLAS, FELLAS.
>> STOP SAYING BAD THINGS ABOUT
FLORENCE.
>> STOP SAYING BAD THINGS ABOUT
FLORENCE.
>> Rev. Putty: AND HER LOVER.
FLORENCE.
>> Rev. Putty: AND HER LOVER.
>> All: HEY!
>> Rev. Putty: AND HER LOVER.
>> All: HEY!
>> Clay: KNOCK IT OFF!
>> All: HEY!
>> Clay: KNOCK IT OFF!
>> CLOSE THE DOOR!
>> Clay: KNOCK IT OFF!
>> CLOSE THE DOOR!
>> DR. POTTERSWHEEL, IT'S MY
>> CLOSE THE DOOR!
>> DR. POTTERSWHEEL, IT'S MY
BUSIEST SUNDAY YET.
>> DR. POTTERSWHEEL, IT'S MY
BUSIEST SUNDAY YET.
>> THE USUAL, DOLLY.
BUSIEST SUNDAY YET.
>> THE USUAL, DOLLY.
>> LONG ISLAND ICED TEA COMING
>> THE USUAL, DOLLY.
>> LONG ISLAND ICED TEA COMING
RIGHT UP.
>> LONG ISLAND ICED TEA COMING
RIGHT UP.
>> Clay: WELL, WELL, WELL,
RIGHT UP.
>> Clay: WELL, WELL, WELL,
DR. QUENTIN XAVIER POTTERSWHEEL.
>> Clay: WELL, WELL, WELL,
DR. QUENTIN XAVIER POTTERSWHEEL.
>> CLAY.
DR. QUENTIN XAVIER POTTERSWHEEL.
>> CLAY.
>> Clay: HEY, DOC, WE WERE JUST
>> CLAY.
>> Clay: HEY, DOC, WE WERE JUST
TALKING ABOUT EX-WIVES.
>> Clay: HEY, DOC, WE WERE JUST
TALKING ABOUT EX-WIVES.
>> I'M A WIDOWER.
TALKING ABOUT EX-WIVES.
>> I'M A WIDOWER.
>> Clay: OH, RIGHT. RIGHT.
>> I'M A WIDOWER.
>> Clay: OH, RIGHT. RIGHT.
MUST BE NICE TO LOSE A WIFE TO
>> Clay: OH, RIGHT. RIGHT.
MUST BE NICE TO LOSE A WIFE TO
SICKNESS AND DEATH INSTEAD OF
MUST BE NICE TO LOSE A WIFE TO
SICKNESS AND DEATH INSTEAD OF
HER JUST PLAIN OLD GETTING SICK
SICKNESS AND DEATH INSTEAD OF
HER JUST PLAIN OLD GETTING SICK
OF YOU.
HER JUST PLAIN OLD GETTING SICK
OF YOU.
>> NO, NOT SO NICE, ESPECIALLY
OF YOU.
>> NO, NOT SO NICE, ESPECIALLY
WHEN YOU'RE A DOCTOR.
>> NO, NOT SO NICE, ESPECIALLY
WHEN YOU'RE A DOCTOR.
>> Clay: SHE JUST LOVED THOSE
WHEN YOU'RE A DOCTOR.
>> Clay: SHE JUST LOVED THOSE
PAIN-KILLERS.
>> Clay: SHE JUST LOVED THOSE
PAIN-KILLERS.
PROBABLY DIDN'T EVEN REALIZE SHE
PAIN-KILLERS.
PROBABLY DIDN'T EVEN REALIZE SHE
WAS INFECTED.
PROBABLY DIDN'T EVEN REALIZE SHE
WAS INFECTED.
RIGHT, DOC?
WAS INFECTED.
RIGHT, DOC?
>> SHE WAS QUITE COMFORTABLE
RIGHT, DOC?
>> SHE WAS QUITE COMFORTABLE
WHEN SHE PASSED.
>> SHE WAS QUITE COMFORTABLE
WHEN SHE PASSED.
>> Clay: NUMB, SOME CALL IT.
WHEN SHE PASSED.
>> Clay: NUMB, SOME CALL IT.
NOW, ME AND JESUS, WE LIKE TO
>> Clay: NUMB, SOME CALL IT.
NOW, ME AND JESUS, WE LIKE TO
FEEL THE PAIN.
NOW, ME AND JESUS, WE LIKE TO
FEEL THE PAIN.
TELL ME, DOC, DID SOME OF THOSE
FEEL THE PAIN.
TELL ME, DOC, DID SOME OF THOSE
PAIN-KILLERS PROTECT HER AGAINST
TELL ME, DOC, DID SOME OF THOSE
PAIN-KILLERS PROTECT HER AGAINST
YOU?
PAIN-KILLERS PROTECT HER AGAINST
YOU?
>> WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?
YOU?
>> WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?
>> Clay: YOU KNOW -- THE PAIN OF
>> WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?
>> Clay: YOU KNOW -- THE PAIN OF
YOU, DAY IN, DAY OUT, BEING
>> Clay: YOU KNOW -- THE PAIN OF
YOU, DAY IN, DAY OUT, BEING
THERE WITH THAT FACE, NOT
YOU, DAY IN, DAY OUT, BEING
THERE WITH THAT FACE, NOT
KNOWING WHAT TO SAY, NOT CARING
THERE WITH THAT FACE, NOT
KNOWING WHAT TO SAY, NOT CARING
ANYMORE, NOT EVEN KNOWING THAT
KNOWING WHAT TO SAY, NOT CARING
ANYMORE, NOT EVEN KNOWING THAT
YOU'LL PROBABLY ONLY CARE ABOUT
ANYMORE, NOT EVEN KNOWING THAT
YOU'LL PROBABLY ONLY CARE ABOUT
HER WHEN IT'S FINALLY TOO LATE,
YOU'LL PROBABLY ONLY CARE ABOUT
HER WHEN IT'S FINALLY TOO LATE,
FORGETTING ABOUT ALL THOSE
HER WHEN IT'S FINALLY TOO LATE,
FORGETTING ABOUT ALL THOSE
DESPERATE -- THOSE DESPERATE
FORGETTING ABOUT ALL THOSE
DESPERATE -- THOSE DESPERATE
YEARS YOU SPENT ALONE, YOUR
DESPERATE -- THOSE DESPERATE
YEARS YOU SPENT ALONE, YOUR
BARREN YEARS WHEN NO WOMAN WOULD
YEARS YOU SPENT ALONE, YOUR
BARREN YEARS WHEN NO WOMAN WOULD
EVEN CONSIDER RESTING HER TIRED
BARREN YEARS WHEN NO WOMAN WOULD
EVEN CONSIDER RESTING HER TIRED
HEAD ON YOUR SHAKY LITTLE
EVEN CONSIDER RESTING HER TIRED
HEAD ON YOUR SHAKY LITTLE
SHOULDER AND STINKING OF BELLY
HEAD ON YOUR SHAKY LITTLE
SHOULDER AND STINKING OF BELLY
SEMEN.
SHOULDER AND STINKING OF BELLY
SEMEN.
WHY EVEN WIPE?
SEMEN.
WHY EVEN WIPE?
AND THEN WHEN YOU FINALLY GET
WHY EVEN WIPE?
AND THEN WHEN YOU FINALLY GET
ONE OF THESE...
AND THEN WHEN YOU FINALLY GET
ONE OF THESE...
[ SINGS FANFARE ]
ONE OF THESE...
[ SINGS FANFARE ]
...COVERED IN PIECES OF TAIL
[ SINGS FANFARE ]
...COVERED IN PIECES OF TAIL
THAT HAVE BEEN BUILT UP AS THE
...COVERED IN PIECES OF TAIL
THAT HAVE BEEN BUILT UP AS THE
GRAND TROPHY IN YOUR NOTHING
THAT HAVE BEEN BUILT UP AS THE
GRAND TROPHY IN YOUR NOTHING
LIFE, YOU TRY DESPERATELY TO
GRAND TROPHY IN YOUR NOTHING
LIFE, YOU TRY DESPERATELY TO
KEEP IT -- NOT TO PROTECT IT,
LIFE, YOU TRY DESPERATELY TO
KEEP IT -- NOT TO PROTECT IT,
BUT TO HOARD IT, TO KEEP IT AWAY
KEEP IT -- NOT TO PROTECT IT,
BUT TO HOARD IT, TO KEEP IT AWAY
FROM THE OTHER WOLVES AND
BUT TO HOARD IT, TO KEEP IT AWAY
FROM THE OTHER WOLVES AND
JACKALS CIRCLING YOUR TERRITORY.
FROM THE OTHER WOLVES AND
JACKALS CIRCLING YOUR TERRITORY.
AND YOU REALIZE ALL TOO SOON
JACKALS CIRCLING YOUR TERRITORY.
AND YOU REALIZE ALL TOO SOON
THAT YOU'RE NOT GOOD ENOUGH!
AND YOU REALIZE ALL TOO SOON
THAT YOU'RE NOT GOOD ENOUGH!
AND MAYBE THERE WAS A JERK-OFF
THAT YOU'RE NOT GOOD ENOUGH!
AND MAYBE THERE WAS A JERK-OFF
CALLED DARWIN AFTER ALL AND THAT
AND MAYBE THERE WAS A JERK-OFF
CALLED DARWIN AFTER ALL AND THAT
YOU NEVER ACKNOWLEDGED HIS
CALLED DARWIN AFTER ALL AND THAT
YOU NEVER ACKNOWLEDGED HIS
EXISTENCE BECAUSE YOU KNEW DEEP
YOU NEVER ACKNOWLEDGED HIS
EXISTENCE BECAUSE YOU KNEW DEEP
INSIDE THAT YOU WERE REALLY WHAT
EXISTENCE BECAUSE YOU KNEW DEEP
INSIDE THAT YOU WERE REALLY WHAT
YOU FEARED YOU WERE -- WEAK AND
INSIDE THAT YOU WERE REALLY WHAT
YOU FEARED YOU WERE -- WEAK AND
PASSIVE AND ULTIMATELY BROKEN BY
YOU FEARED YOU WERE -- WEAK AND
PASSIVE AND ULTIMATELY BROKEN BY
THE ONES WHO WERE MADE THE
PASSIVE AND ULTIMATELY BROKEN BY
THE ONES WHO WERE MADE THE
FITTEST.
THE ONES WHO WERE MADE THE
FITTEST.
AND THEN THROUGH YOUR
FITTEST.
AND THEN THROUGH YOUR
WEAKNESSES, YOU BUILT UP A
AND THEN THROUGH YOUR
WEAKNESSES, YOU BUILT UP A
POISON THAT POISONED OTHERS
WEAKNESSES, YOU BUILT UP A
POISON THAT POISONED OTHERS
AROUND YOU...
POISON THAT POISONED OTHERS
AROUND YOU...
[ Sobbing ] ...THAT YOU LOVE.
AROUND YOU...
[ Sobbing ] ...THAT YOU LOVE.
AND THE ONLY TRUE JUSTICE WAS TO
[ Sobbing ] ...THAT YOU LOVE.
AND THE ONLY TRUE JUSTICE WAS TO
LET THOSE DOMINANT JACKALS FEED
AND THE ONLY TRUE JUSTICE WAS TO
LET THOSE DOMINANT JACKALS FEED
ON YOU, SURVIVE OFF YOU.
IF THAT ONE GETS TOO SWEATY, I
GOT AN EXTRA ONE FOR YOU.
>> UH...
GOT AN EXTRA ONE FOR YOU.
>> UH...
>> Clay: AH, COME ON, DOC.
>> UH...
>> Clay: AH, COME ON, DOC.
IT'S A NICE ONE.
>> Clay: AH, COME ON, DOC.
IT'S A NICE ONE.
>> CLAY, MAYBE THE DOCTOR WOULD
IT'S A NICE ONE.
>> CLAY, MAYBE THE DOCTOR WOULD
LIKE TO BE LEFT ALONE.
>> CLAY, MAYBE THE DOCTOR WOULD
LIKE TO BE LEFT ALONE.
>> Clay: OH, IS THAT SO?
LIKE TO BE LEFT ALONE.
>> Clay: OH, IS THAT SO?
WELL, MAYBE YOU WOULD LIKE TO
>> Clay: OH, IS THAT SO?
WELL, MAYBE YOU WOULD LIKE TO
PUT THOSE SLIMY LITTLE BREASTS
WELL, MAYBE YOU WOULD LIKE TO
PUT THOSE SLIMY LITTLE BREASTS
RIGHT IN MY KISSER.
PUT THOSE SLIMY LITTLE BREASTS
RIGHT IN MY KISSER.
OOH, THE LONG ARM OF THE LAW.
RIGHT IN MY KISSER.
OOH, THE LONG ARM OF THE LAW.
>> NO, ROGER.
OOH, THE LONG ARM OF THE LAW.
>> NO, ROGER.
>> Clay: [ Laughing ] YEAH,
>> NO, ROGER.
>> Clay: [ Laughing ] YEAH,
ROGER, LISTEN TO THE WIFE
>> Clay: [ Laughing ] YEAH,
ROGER, LISTEN TO THE WIFE
MURDERER.
ROGER, LISTEN TO THE WIFE
MURDERER.
[ GLASS BREAKS ]
MURDERER.
[ GLASS BREAKS ]
OH. OH. OH. OH.
[ GLASS BREAKS ]
OH. OH. OH. OH.
UH-OH. UH-OH.
OH. OH. OH. OH.
UH-OH. UH-OH.
AW, YOU BETTER GO, TOO, REVS.
UH-OH. UH-OH.
AW, YOU BETTER GO, TOO, REVS.
LET THE MEN HANDLE THIS.
AW, YOU BETTER GO, TOO, REVS.
LET THE MEN HANDLE THIS.
>> Rev. Putty: HOW WOULD YOUR
LET THE MEN HANDLE THIS.
>> Rev. Putty: HOW WOULD YOUR
TEETH LIKE A FIVE-FINGER
>> Rev. Putty: HOW WOULD YOUR
TEETH LIKE A FIVE-FINGER
DISCOUNT ON A KNUCKLE SANDWICH,
TEETH LIKE A FIVE-FINGER
DISCOUNT ON A KNUCKLE SANDWICH,
PUPPINGTON?
DISCOUNT ON A KNUCKLE SANDWICH,
PUPPINGTON?
>> Clay: AHH...
PUPPINGTON?
>> Clay: AHH...
AHH...
>> Clay: AHH...
AHH...
WELL?
AHH...
WELL?
WHAT ARE YOU WAITIN' FOR?
WELL?
WHAT ARE YOU WAITIN' FOR?
I'M WAITIN'.
WHAT ARE YOU WAITIN' FOR?
I'M WAITIN'.
I'M WAITIN'.
I'M WAITIN'.
I'M WAITIN'.
WELL, IT LOOKS LIKE THE ONLY
I'M WAITIN'.
WELL, IT LOOKS LIKE THE ONLY
FISTS THAT ARE RAISED IN THIS
WELL, IT LOOKS LIKE THE ONLY
FISTS THAT ARE RAISED IN THIS
TOWN ARE PACI-FISTS.
FISTS THAT ARE RAISED IN THIS
TOWN ARE PACI-FISTS.
YEAH, RUN.
TOWN ARE PACI-FISTS.
YEAH, RUN.
GET OUT OF HERE.
YEAH, RUN.
GET OUT OF HERE.
GET OUT OF HERE, COWARDS!
GET OUT OF HERE.
GET OUT OF HERE, COWARDS!
LOOK AT YA!
GET OUT OF HERE, COWARDS!
LOOK AT YA!
[ LAUGHS ]
LOOK AT YA!
[ LAUGHS ]
WHERE ARE YOU ALL GOING?
[ LAUGHS ]
WHERE ARE YOU ALL GOING?
GET BACK HERE!
WHERE ARE YOU ALL GOING?
GET BACK HERE!
YOU COME BACK HERE!
GET BACK HERE!
YOU COME BACK HERE!
SHOW ME THAT YOU HAVE ONE OUNCE
YOU COME BACK HERE!
SHOW ME THAT YOU HAVE ONE OUNCE
OF TESTOSTERONE BETWEEN THE
SHOW ME THAT YOU HAVE ONE OUNCE
OF TESTOSTERONE BETWEEN THE
THREE OF YOU!
OF TESTOSTERONE BETWEEN THE
THREE OF YOU!
WITH ALL YOU PEOPLE AS ROLE
THREE OF YOU!
WITH ALL YOU PEOPLE AS ROLE
MODELS, NO WONDER MY SON IS...
WITH ALL YOU PEOPLE AS ROLE
MODELS, NO WONDER MY SON IS...
SENSITIVE.
MODELS, NO WONDER MY SON IS...
SENSITIVE.
>> I'M SUPERGOD!
SENSITIVE.
>> I'M SUPERGOD!
NOW, NOW, AND FOREVER!
>> I'M SUPERGOD!
NOW, NOW, AND FOREVER!
[ TELEPHONE RINGS ]
NOW, NOW, AND FOREVER!
[ TELEPHONE RINGS ]
>> Orel: NO ONE'S THERE.
[ TELEPHONE RINGS ]
>> Orel: NO ONE'S THERE.
GOSH.
>> Orel: NO ONE'S THERE.
GOSH.
>> Bloberta: HANDKERCHIEF.
GOSH.
>> Bloberta: HANDKERCHIEF.
HANDKERCHIEF. HANDKERCHIEF.
>> Bloberta: HANDKERCHIEF.
HANDKERCHIEF. HANDKERCHIEF.
>> Orel: HE'S GOT TO COME HOME
HANDKERCHIEF. HANDKERCHIEF.
>> Orel: HE'S GOT TO COME HOME
ON EASTER AND ALL.
>> Orel: HE'S GOT TO COME HOME
ON EASTER AND ALL.
>> Bloberta: HANDKERCHIEF.
ON EASTER AND ALL.
>> Bloberta: HANDKERCHIEF.
>> Shapey: MOMMY?
>> Bloberta: HANDKERCHIEF.
>> Shapey: MOMMY?
>> Bloberta: NOT NOW, SHAPEY.
>> Shapey: MOMMY?
>> Bloberta: NOT NOW, SHAPEY.
NO MILK.
>> Bloberta: NOT NOW, SHAPEY.
NO MILK.
>> Shapey: WHEN I'M THIRSTY, IT
NO MILK.
>> Shapey: WHEN I'M THIRSTY, IT
FEELS HOW I FEEL WHEN I'M ALONE.
>> Shapey: WHEN I'M THIRSTY, IT
FEELS HOW I FEEL WHEN I'M ALONE.
>> Bloberta: WHAT?
FEELS HOW I FEEL WHEN I'M ALONE.
>> Bloberta: WHAT?
>> Orel: GOLLY.
>> Bloberta: WHAT?
>> Orel: GOLLY.
THINGS SURE HAVE CHANGED AROUND
>> Orel: GOLLY.
THINGS SURE HAVE CHANGED AROUND
HERE.
>> ? YOU SAY IT WOULDN'T WORK ?
? IT WOULDN'T TAKE ?
? IT WOULDN'T TAKE ?
? IT WOULDN'T DO ANY GOOD ?
? IT WOULDN'T DO ANY GOOD ?
? IT WOULDN'T CHANGE A THING ?
? IT WOULDN'T CHANGE A THING ?
? AND I BEING I CAN'T SAY MUCH
? AND I BEING I CAN'T SAY MUCH
TO DENY IT ?
TO DENY IT ?
? BUT I'M STUCK WITH AN URGE ?
? BUT I'M STUCK WITH AN URGE ?
? TO ONLY HAVE TRIED IT ?
? TO ONLY HAVE TRIED IT ?
? YOU SAY IT WOULDN'T DO ?
? YOU SAY IT WOULDN'T DO ?
? IT WOULDN'T SHAKE ?
? IT WOULDN'T SHAKE ?
? IT WOULDN'T MAKE ANY WAVES ?
? IT WOULDN'T MAKE ANY WAVES ?
? IT WOULDN'T BE NO USE ?
? IT WOULDN'T BE NO USE ?
? AND YOU BEING YOU, YOU KNOW
? AND YOU BEING YOU, YOU KNOW
SURE HOW TO PHRASE IT ?