Mike & Molly (2010–2016): Season 6, Episode 9 - Baby, Please Don't Go - full transcript
Thank you.
Pretty bold choice not
tipping that barista.
Okay, I'm sorry,
I tip for good service,
and in what world
does it take 20 minutes
to make a simple cup of coffee?
Holy moly, that is good.
I told you he was an artist.
Look what he wrote in the foam.
"Thank you for your patience."
Well, I'm a horrible
human being.
No, you're not, honey.
You're just cheap.
I'm not cheap.
You know what?
Watch this.
Hello there!
A little something for...
Oh, you know what?
That's actually a 20.
She thought it was a single.
No, I thought it was a five.
Which is so very generous,
but, um...
Okay, well,
that's a $20 for you.
And you owe me 15 bucks.
Ms. Flynn?
Yeah.
Do I know you?
Oh, my God.
Yeah, you were
my favorite teacher.
Oh, that is so sweet.
You don't know who I am.
Not a clue.
It's okay.
Uh, last time you saw me,
I was ten years old,
uh, I had no front teeth,
and I had a pirate patch
to cover my lazy eye.
Frannie DuVall!
Yeah. Present.
Oh, of course I remember you.
I don't remember that.
Sweetie, I wouldn't
cover that up with a sign.
You'd make a lot more money.
When did you...
or, you know, how did you...
I mean, not how.
I know... I know how.
Um... hey.
We were just talking about
grabbing a-a bite to eat.
Would you... would you
like to come with us?
We just ate.
We're gonna eat again.
What do you say, you in?
Yeah, that... that would
be great actually.
Okay.
Well, maybe we could
get a cocktail, too.
Victoria, she's, like, 17.
Well, they're not gonna
card a pregnant girl.
Come on, sweetie.
Let's grab all
your filthy stuff.
♪ La, la-ba-dee-da ♪
♪ La, la-ba-dee-da ♪
♪ For the first time
in my life ♪
♪ I see love ♪
♪ I see love ♪
♪ For the first time
in my life ♪
♪ I see love ♪
I don't know if you
hung out with those hobos
under that bridge on Cicero,
but last Christmas,
I was the guy who left a bag
of Whopper Jr.'s under there,
so, you know...
...you're welcome.
Vince, she's our guest.
Don't talk to her.
There you go.
Okay, turkey sandwich.
I almost made you a PB and J,
but then I remembered
you had a nut allergy.
You have a good memory.
Well, you were my first EpiPen.
And my second.
And I'm so sorry
about those walnut brownies,
but, in my defense,
you shouldn't have
called it a "peanut allergy"
if it included
the entire nut family.
So, when's your baby due,
Frannie?
Uh, they said at the clinic
something like
six weeks from now.
Wow! That's coming up
in about...
Six weeks.
Oh, kid, it's got to be rough
out there on those streets.
Wh-what do you use
for protection?
Mom, she obviously
didn't use protection.
I'm sorry for her ignorance.
I'm just saying,
I don't leave the house without
a steak knife in my purse.
You try to rob me,
or talk in a movie theater,
you're gonna see the blade.
I just hope your throat doesn't
close up around all these nuts.
Uh, so...
How's a kid like you
survive out there?
I do what I got to do.
Um, some days I make
enough money off
of what people give me,
and sometimes
I got to get a little
more... creative.
Mm, like, uh,
Mary Magdalene creative?
Ew! Mom!
And by "ew," I mean
no one's judging you.
Yeah... no, I meant more like
"stealing" creative.
Okay, thank God, 'cause I was...
I was judging you a little bit.
I'm-I'm not proud of it,
but I've shoplifted
and stuff like that.
You know, you would be surprised
how often people leave
their cars unlocked.
Hey, how's it going?
Hey, honey.
Uh, this is Frannie.
Former student of mine.
- She's homeless.
- And pregnant.
And she's telling us
how she robs cars.
All right.
I got Frannie all
set up on the couch.
You sure we can trust her
down there alone?
She's not gonna steal anything.
And if she does, you've been
looking for a reason
to buy a new TV.
Well, if that's the case,
we can throw in the microwave,
I'll drive her
to the pawn shop myself.
She's a sweet kid
in a tough spot.
I couldn't just walk away.
I mean, I'm her
favorite teacher.
Her words, not mine.
Everybody loves fourth grade.
- They don't teach you the hard stuff yet.
- Really?
State capitals?
Times tables?
That is core knowledge, baby.
What about her parents?
I mean,
do they even know where she's at?
Frannie said they kicked
her out of the house.
I mean, they basically
just wrote her off.
Okay, but do we know
that actually happened?
I mean, you're taking the word
of an admitted criminal.
A criminal? Really?
She shoplifted a few times.
You're always eating grapes
at the grocery store.
I sample.
That's different.
Really? You ever pay
for those afterwards?
Not if they don't
meet my standards.
Besides, it doesn't matter
what happened
between her and her parents.
I mean, put yourself
in their shoes.
If your daughter
was living on the street...
alone,
wouldn't you want somebody
to bring her home to you?
Yes.
Because?
Because I'd be
worried sick about her.
Exactly.
Wait a minute,
did I just win an argument?
I think you did.
Aw, good for you.
Um, okay, South Dakota?
- Pierre.
- Ooh.
- Seven times eight?
- 56.
God, I was good.
Yeah, you really were.
I still remember when those kids
were making fun
of my lazy eye patch.
You stuck up for me.
You wore one for a whole week.
Oh, it really was
just a happy accident.
I-I had pinkeye.
Fourth graders are filthy.
Either way, it kept them off
my back till Larry Bean got lice.
Oof.
I want to shave my head
for that kid.
You were-you were great through.
Hmm.
Always doing extra credit.
Staying after school to help me.
'Cause I didn't want to go home.
Look, and I still don't.
I'm telling you
this is a waste of time.
Okay, I know you think it is,
but if-if you were my daughter,
I would want to know that you
and that baby were safe.
Yeah, well,
if you were my mother,
I probably would've
told you I was pregnant.
They don't know?
- Okay, they're super religious.
- Oh, my God.
No, they're the kind of people
that think that dancing
will lead to pregnancy.
- Well...
- Okay.
One time they were right.
You know, people could change.
I did, you know?
When I was a kid, I got
into all kinds of trouble.
Double-pierced my ears
without permission.
TP'ed a house.
Went back to clean it up.
Got caught.
Cried my way out of it.
Whoa, pretty bad-ass.
My point is that,
you know, everybody
deserves a second chance,
even your parents.
You ready?
No.
All right.
You sit tight here,
I'll go in first,
I'll talk to them,
I'll work a little bit of
my Ms. Flynn magic.
I have a feeling they're
not quite the monsters
that you think they are.
So, those people are monsters.
Yeah, I told you.
Just so much worse
than you even said.
I mean, I-I tried explaining
your situation to your mother
and she just shouted,
: "I rebuke thee!"
And, I mean, that... it was...
I'm not even doing it justice.
It came from a real deep place.
And then your dad starting
splashing me with his Fresca,
I mean, like it was holy water.
Home sweet home.
Okay, living there
is not an option.
So, you're gonna
come home with me
and you can stay there
until we figure this out.
God, no, no, you-you
don't have to do that.
Well, I certainly am not gonna
put you out on the street
to raise a baby.
Oh, I'm-I'm not
keeping the baby.
I'm giving it up.
- Oh.
- Yeah.
Look at me,
I... I can't raise a kid.
I want it to have a safe home,
and a chance at a good life.
I can't give it all that.
- Look, you probably think I'm a horrible...
- I'll take it!
I'll take that baby.
Hey.
Hey.
I thought, uh, Molly was
taking you back to your folks.
Uh... yeah, it, uh,
it didn't work out.
So where is everybody?
Uh, Ms. Flynn is upstairs,
redhead lady and bald guy
are at a casino,
and stoned chick
when into the backyard
with a lighter and an apple.
You're a cop,
you could probably, like,
put that together.
Making yourself at home?
Yeah, I am.
Well, just so you know
how things work around here,
everybody has their own box of
cereal and you are eating mine.
This was the only one
that doesn't say,
"For healthy stools"
on the front.
Yeah, I know, that's why
I wrote my name on the box.
See, Trix are for Mike.
Look, let's, uh,
let's cut to the chase
about you staying here, okay?
Molly is a nice person.
Probably too nice.
Me? I'm not so nice.
Dude, it's just cereal.
Okay, "dude,"
it's not about that.
See, I'm a cop,
so I've seen it all, okay?
So, it's a little hard for me
to buy this whole "poor little
pregnant girl" routine.
There's nothing to buy.
That's literally what I am.
Just so you know
I got my eye on you.
If you're trying to scare me,
you might want to wipe
that dribble of pink milk
off your chin.
Nobody likes a smart-ass.
- Did I get it?
- Yeah.
You know, uh, this city
has a lot of great programs
for kids in your, uh...
situation.
I could set you up
at a really nice place.
It would take care of you
and your baby.
I'm good.
I already found a family
that's gonna take the baby.
Really? That's great!
When did this happen?
Today, actually.
- They seem pretty cool.
- Mm.
Uh, well, the wife.
The husband is kind of a dork.
Hey, that's the man who's gonna
adopt your child,
show a little respect.
Yeah, you're right.
I should.
Another dribble.
You know what?
I think something's up
with this spoon.
Hey, hon.
So glad you're home,
I got big news for you.
Oh, I know, uh,
Frannie already told me.
She did?
Dang it, I wanted to see
the look on your face
when you first found out.
It was a lot like this,
except, uh, there was,
uh, some milk dribble.
You seem really calm about this.
What's the big deal?
I mean, I think it's great,
but I don't see how
it's gonna change our lives.
Okay, um...
what exactly did she tell you?
Uh, she said
she found some couple
that was gonna take the baby.
- No.
- Yes.
- No.
- Yes.
- No, no, no, no, Molly!
- Yes! Yes, yes!
Why would you do this
without talking to me?
Well, I know it seems crazy,
but it all happened so fast,
and I wanted to snatch it up
before somebody else
got to it first.
It's not a door buster
at Wal-Mart, it's a baby!
I know that, but you know how
long we've been wanting this.
And then suddenly Frannie just
shows up on our doorstep?
Mike, this is fate.
No, it's a combination
of bad parenting,
poor choices, and you
not having change for a 20.
Yes. Boom. Fate.
Look, you're not
thinking this through.
I'm telling you,
this is a bad idea.
Okay, uh, what happened
to my baby-crazy husband?
I mean, you were telling me
favorite boy names
by our third date.
And I want to have a little
Jordan Pippin Biggs,
but I want it to be our baby.
Together.
Well, what difference does it
make where it comes from?
Do we know anything
about the father?
Do either one of them
have a drug history?
And what about her?
She's an admitted petty criminal.
Oh, Mike, come on,
we all have a dark past.
I have TP'ed houses.
Yeah, and you made
the biggest decision of our lives
without me.
Where are you going?
I'm going to the store.
'Cause if things weren't
bad enough,
we're out of my cereal.
I don't get you, man.
For the last three years
all I hear is,
"I want a kid, I want a kid!"
Now you could have a kid,
you don't want the kid.
Are you kidding me?
I just want to
make the right decision.
What do we know about this baby?
It sleeps, it poops,
and it cries when it's hungry.
You two should get on famously.
Yeah, but it's not ours,
me and Molly's, you know?
I always imagined
that when we had a baby,
it would look like me, okay?
All babies look like you.
Look, adoption
is a wonderful thing.
It's-it's just not for me.
Why not?
I mean, if you're worried
that the kid won't love you,
you're wrong.
I was raised by my grandma
and I loved her even more
because she chose to do it.
It's not about
the kid loving me.
What if...
What if I can't love it back
because deep down
I know that it's not mine?
That's what
you're worried about?
Well, I'm just being honest.
I mean, that's not fair
to the kid.
Children need to be
taken care of and loved.
Come on, man.
You are the most loving
person I've ever met.
We have never passed a baby that you
didn't play peek-a-boo with.
And the kid always got
tired of it before you did.
Hey, Mike.
I would love to have you
as a father.
In some ways you were.
You taught me to drive,
took me voting after
I got my citizenship,
and vastly underpaid me
to do your yardwork.
Oh, good, you're home.
Listen, about the baby...
Okay, okay before
you say anything,
I know I made this decision
without you,
but it doesn't mean
that it's not the right one.
I agree, you're right.
But what if I'm right, huh?
Okay, I know you
don't like change,
and sometimes I make
you change and you like it.
Remember how you put up a fight
about putting mushrooms
on a burger?
Here.
What is this?
Open it.
A necklace that says, "Wow."
Flip it over.
"Mom."
You're always right.
I would love nothing more
than to give that baby a home.
I love you so much.
Hey!
Where's Frannie?
I got her a little gift, too.
She's upstairs, I...
- I'll go get her!
- Okay.
"Trix are for Frannie."
"And Mike."
She did eat some of mine.
Mike!
- She's gone. Frannie's not down there.
- Gone where?
"Ms. Flynn,
"Thank for everything.
"Sorry for causing
so much trouble
between you and Mr. Flynn."
I-I didn't take your name.
Okay, that is not
the important thing right now.
Okay, okay.
Let's get our coats.
Come on, get in the car.
Mike, there's no way
that she's gonna go back
to the same place I found her.
There she is.
How have you not
made detective yet?
Frannie, honey, what are you
doing back out here?
Really, I'm-I'm good, Ms. Flynn.
Okay, come on, kiddo.
You are coming home with us.
Why? Why, so that you guys
can argue some more?
I heard you fighting.
Look, you're both so nice.
I don't want to cause any more
trouble than I already have.
What trouble? I mean,
the fight's over.
Mike didn't mean what he said.
Yeah, I'm a knucklehead.
He's a knucklehead.
Sometimes, it-it just takes him
a minute to come around.
Yeah, but once I do,
I am on board.
And I am fully on board
for this, Frannie.
For everything.
Yeah, we both-we both are.
Are you sure?
'Cause you know, being a parent
is a big responsibility.
Can't be out late like this
roaming the streets.
Dude, we know.
All right then.
Let's go home.
All right, okay.
♪ I'm gonna be a grandpa ♪
♪ A grandpa, a grandpa ♪
♪ Or a Pee-Paw ♪
♪ Or a Pop-Pop ♪
♪ I'm gonna be an Auntie ♪
♪ Or an Auntie ♪
♪ Or a Mimi. ♪
I'm gonna be Joyce.
And if anybody
says the "G" word,
I'm pulling out my blade.
Pretty bold choice not
tipping that barista.
Okay, I'm sorry,
I tip for good service,
and in what world
does it take 20 minutes
to make a simple cup of coffee?
Holy moly, that is good.
I told you he was an artist.
Look what he wrote in the foam.
"Thank you for your patience."
Well, I'm a horrible
human being.
No, you're not, honey.
You're just cheap.
I'm not cheap.
You know what?
Watch this.
Hello there!
A little something for...
Oh, you know what?
That's actually a 20.
She thought it was a single.
No, I thought it was a five.
Which is so very generous,
but, um...
Okay, well,
that's a $20 for you.
And you owe me 15 bucks.
Ms. Flynn?
Yeah.
Do I know you?
Oh, my God.
Yeah, you were
my favorite teacher.
Oh, that is so sweet.
You don't know who I am.
Not a clue.
It's okay.
Uh, last time you saw me,
I was ten years old,
uh, I had no front teeth,
and I had a pirate patch
to cover my lazy eye.
Frannie DuVall!
Yeah. Present.
Oh, of course I remember you.
I don't remember that.
Sweetie, I wouldn't
cover that up with a sign.
You'd make a lot more money.
When did you...
or, you know, how did you...
I mean, not how.
I know... I know how.
Um... hey.
We were just talking about
grabbing a-a bite to eat.
Would you... would you
like to come with us?
We just ate.
We're gonna eat again.
What do you say, you in?
Yeah, that... that would
be great actually.
Okay.
Well, maybe we could
get a cocktail, too.
Victoria, she's, like, 17.
Well, they're not gonna
card a pregnant girl.
Come on, sweetie.
Let's grab all
your filthy stuff.
♪ La, la-ba-dee-da ♪
♪ La, la-ba-dee-da ♪
♪ For the first time
in my life ♪
♪ I see love ♪
♪ I see love ♪
♪ For the first time
in my life ♪
♪ I see love ♪
I don't know if you
hung out with those hobos
under that bridge on Cicero,
but last Christmas,
I was the guy who left a bag
of Whopper Jr.'s under there,
so, you know...
...you're welcome.
Vince, she's our guest.
Don't talk to her.
There you go.
Okay, turkey sandwich.
I almost made you a PB and J,
but then I remembered
you had a nut allergy.
You have a good memory.
Well, you were my first EpiPen.
And my second.
And I'm so sorry
about those walnut brownies,
but, in my defense,
you shouldn't have
called it a "peanut allergy"
if it included
the entire nut family.
So, when's your baby due,
Frannie?
Uh, they said at the clinic
something like
six weeks from now.
Wow! That's coming up
in about...
Six weeks.
Oh, kid, it's got to be rough
out there on those streets.
Wh-what do you use
for protection?
Mom, she obviously
didn't use protection.
I'm sorry for her ignorance.
I'm just saying,
I don't leave the house without
a steak knife in my purse.
You try to rob me,
or talk in a movie theater,
you're gonna see the blade.
I just hope your throat doesn't
close up around all these nuts.
Uh, so...
How's a kid like you
survive out there?
I do what I got to do.
Um, some days I make
enough money off
of what people give me,
and sometimes
I got to get a little
more... creative.
Mm, like, uh,
Mary Magdalene creative?
Ew! Mom!
And by "ew," I mean
no one's judging you.
Yeah... no, I meant more like
"stealing" creative.
Okay, thank God, 'cause I was...
I was judging you a little bit.
I'm-I'm not proud of it,
but I've shoplifted
and stuff like that.
You know, you would be surprised
how often people leave
their cars unlocked.
Hey, how's it going?
Hey, honey.
Uh, this is Frannie.
Former student of mine.
- She's homeless.
- And pregnant.
And she's telling us
how she robs cars.
All right.
I got Frannie all
set up on the couch.
You sure we can trust her
down there alone?
She's not gonna steal anything.
And if she does, you've been
looking for a reason
to buy a new TV.
Well, if that's the case,
we can throw in the microwave,
I'll drive her
to the pawn shop myself.
She's a sweet kid
in a tough spot.
I couldn't just walk away.
I mean, I'm her
favorite teacher.
Her words, not mine.
Everybody loves fourth grade.
- They don't teach you the hard stuff yet.
- Really?
State capitals?
Times tables?
That is core knowledge, baby.
What about her parents?
I mean,
do they even know where she's at?
Frannie said they kicked
her out of the house.
I mean, they basically
just wrote her off.
Okay, but do we know
that actually happened?
I mean, you're taking the word
of an admitted criminal.
A criminal? Really?
She shoplifted a few times.
You're always eating grapes
at the grocery store.
I sample.
That's different.
Really? You ever pay
for those afterwards?
Not if they don't
meet my standards.
Besides, it doesn't matter
what happened
between her and her parents.
I mean, put yourself
in their shoes.
If your daughter
was living on the street...
alone,
wouldn't you want somebody
to bring her home to you?
Yes.
Because?
Because I'd be
worried sick about her.
Exactly.
Wait a minute,
did I just win an argument?
I think you did.
Aw, good for you.
Um, okay, South Dakota?
- Pierre.
- Ooh.
- Seven times eight?
- 56.
God, I was good.
Yeah, you really were.
I still remember when those kids
were making fun
of my lazy eye patch.
You stuck up for me.
You wore one for a whole week.
Oh, it really was
just a happy accident.
I-I had pinkeye.
Fourth graders are filthy.
Either way, it kept them off
my back till Larry Bean got lice.
Oof.
I want to shave my head
for that kid.
You were-you were great through.
Hmm.
Always doing extra credit.
Staying after school to help me.
'Cause I didn't want to go home.
Look, and I still don't.
I'm telling you
this is a waste of time.
Okay, I know you think it is,
but if-if you were my daughter,
I would want to know that you
and that baby were safe.
Yeah, well,
if you were my mother,
I probably would've
told you I was pregnant.
They don't know?
- Okay, they're super religious.
- Oh, my God.
No, they're the kind of people
that think that dancing
will lead to pregnancy.
- Well...
- Okay.
One time they were right.
You know, people could change.
I did, you know?
When I was a kid, I got
into all kinds of trouble.
Double-pierced my ears
without permission.
TP'ed a house.
Went back to clean it up.
Got caught.
Cried my way out of it.
Whoa, pretty bad-ass.
My point is that,
you know, everybody
deserves a second chance,
even your parents.
You ready?
No.
All right.
You sit tight here,
I'll go in first,
I'll talk to them,
I'll work a little bit of
my Ms. Flynn magic.
I have a feeling they're
not quite the monsters
that you think they are.
So, those people are monsters.
Yeah, I told you.
Just so much worse
than you even said.
I mean, I-I tried explaining
your situation to your mother
and she just shouted,
: "I rebuke thee!"
And, I mean, that... it was...
I'm not even doing it justice.
It came from a real deep place.
And then your dad starting
splashing me with his Fresca,
I mean, like it was holy water.
Home sweet home.
Okay, living there
is not an option.
So, you're gonna
come home with me
and you can stay there
until we figure this out.
God, no, no, you-you
don't have to do that.
Well, I certainly am not gonna
put you out on the street
to raise a baby.
Oh, I'm-I'm not
keeping the baby.
I'm giving it up.
- Oh.
- Yeah.
Look at me,
I... I can't raise a kid.
I want it to have a safe home,
and a chance at a good life.
I can't give it all that.
- Look, you probably think I'm a horrible...
- I'll take it!
I'll take that baby.
Hey.
Hey.
I thought, uh, Molly was
taking you back to your folks.
Uh... yeah, it, uh,
it didn't work out.
So where is everybody?
Uh, Ms. Flynn is upstairs,
redhead lady and bald guy
are at a casino,
and stoned chick
when into the backyard
with a lighter and an apple.
You're a cop,
you could probably, like,
put that together.
Making yourself at home?
Yeah, I am.
Well, just so you know
how things work around here,
everybody has their own box of
cereal and you are eating mine.
This was the only one
that doesn't say,
"For healthy stools"
on the front.
Yeah, I know, that's why
I wrote my name on the box.
See, Trix are for Mike.
Look, let's, uh,
let's cut to the chase
about you staying here, okay?
Molly is a nice person.
Probably too nice.
Me? I'm not so nice.
Dude, it's just cereal.
Okay, "dude,"
it's not about that.
See, I'm a cop,
so I've seen it all, okay?
So, it's a little hard for me
to buy this whole "poor little
pregnant girl" routine.
There's nothing to buy.
That's literally what I am.
Just so you know
I got my eye on you.
If you're trying to scare me,
you might want to wipe
that dribble of pink milk
off your chin.
Nobody likes a smart-ass.
- Did I get it?
- Yeah.
You know, uh, this city
has a lot of great programs
for kids in your, uh...
situation.
I could set you up
at a really nice place.
It would take care of you
and your baby.
I'm good.
I already found a family
that's gonna take the baby.
Really? That's great!
When did this happen?
Today, actually.
- They seem pretty cool.
- Mm.
Uh, well, the wife.
The husband is kind of a dork.
Hey, that's the man who's gonna
adopt your child,
show a little respect.
Yeah, you're right.
I should.
Another dribble.
You know what?
I think something's up
with this spoon.
Hey, hon.
So glad you're home,
I got big news for you.
Oh, I know, uh,
Frannie already told me.
She did?
Dang it, I wanted to see
the look on your face
when you first found out.
It was a lot like this,
except, uh, there was,
uh, some milk dribble.
You seem really calm about this.
What's the big deal?
I mean, I think it's great,
but I don't see how
it's gonna change our lives.
Okay, um...
what exactly did she tell you?
Uh, she said
she found some couple
that was gonna take the baby.
- No.
- Yes.
- No.
- Yes.
- No, no, no, no, Molly!
- Yes! Yes, yes!
Why would you do this
without talking to me?
Well, I know it seems crazy,
but it all happened so fast,
and I wanted to snatch it up
before somebody else
got to it first.
It's not a door buster
at Wal-Mart, it's a baby!
I know that, but you know how
long we've been wanting this.
And then suddenly Frannie just
shows up on our doorstep?
Mike, this is fate.
No, it's a combination
of bad parenting,
poor choices, and you
not having change for a 20.
Yes. Boom. Fate.
Look, you're not
thinking this through.
I'm telling you,
this is a bad idea.
Okay, uh, what happened
to my baby-crazy husband?
I mean, you were telling me
favorite boy names
by our third date.
And I want to have a little
Jordan Pippin Biggs,
but I want it to be our baby.
Together.
Well, what difference does it
make where it comes from?
Do we know anything
about the father?
Do either one of them
have a drug history?
And what about her?
She's an admitted petty criminal.
Oh, Mike, come on,
we all have a dark past.
I have TP'ed houses.
Yeah, and you made
the biggest decision of our lives
without me.
Where are you going?
I'm going to the store.
'Cause if things weren't
bad enough,
we're out of my cereal.
I don't get you, man.
For the last three years
all I hear is,
"I want a kid, I want a kid!"
Now you could have a kid,
you don't want the kid.
Are you kidding me?
I just want to
make the right decision.
What do we know about this baby?
It sleeps, it poops,
and it cries when it's hungry.
You two should get on famously.
Yeah, but it's not ours,
me and Molly's, you know?
I always imagined
that when we had a baby,
it would look like me, okay?
All babies look like you.
Look, adoption
is a wonderful thing.
It's-it's just not for me.
Why not?
I mean, if you're worried
that the kid won't love you,
you're wrong.
I was raised by my grandma
and I loved her even more
because she chose to do it.
It's not about
the kid loving me.
What if...
What if I can't love it back
because deep down
I know that it's not mine?
That's what
you're worried about?
Well, I'm just being honest.
I mean, that's not fair
to the kid.
Children need to be
taken care of and loved.
Come on, man.
You are the most loving
person I've ever met.
We have never passed a baby that you
didn't play peek-a-boo with.
And the kid always got
tired of it before you did.
Hey, Mike.
I would love to have you
as a father.
In some ways you were.
You taught me to drive,
took me voting after
I got my citizenship,
and vastly underpaid me
to do your yardwork.
Oh, good, you're home.
Listen, about the baby...
Okay, okay before
you say anything,
I know I made this decision
without you,
but it doesn't mean
that it's not the right one.
I agree, you're right.
But what if I'm right, huh?
Okay, I know you
don't like change,
and sometimes I make
you change and you like it.
Remember how you put up a fight
about putting mushrooms
on a burger?
Here.
What is this?
Open it.
A necklace that says, "Wow."
Flip it over.
"Mom."
You're always right.
I would love nothing more
than to give that baby a home.
I love you so much.
Hey!
Where's Frannie?
I got her a little gift, too.
She's upstairs, I...
- I'll go get her!
- Okay.
"Trix are for Frannie."
"And Mike."
She did eat some of mine.
Mike!
- She's gone. Frannie's not down there.
- Gone where?
"Ms. Flynn,
"Thank for everything.
"Sorry for causing
so much trouble
between you and Mr. Flynn."
I-I didn't take your name.
Okay, that is not
the important thing right now.
Okay, okay.
Let's get our coats.
Come on, get in the car.
Mike, there's no way
that she's gonna go back
to the same place I found her.
There she is.
How have you not
made detective yet?
Frannie, honey, what are you
doing back out here?
Really, I'm-I'm good, Ms. Flynn.
Okay, come on, kiddo.
You are coming home with us.
Why? Why, so that you guys
can argue some more?
I heard you fighting.
Look, you're both so nice.
I don't want to cause any more
trouble than I already have.
What trouble? I mean,
the fight's over.
Mike didn't mean what he said.
Yeah, I'm a knucklehead.
He's a knucklehead.
Sometimes, it-it just takes him
a minute to come around.
Yeah, but once I do,
I am on board.
And I am fully on board
for this, Frannie.
For everything.
Yeah, we both-we both are.
Are you sure?
'Cause you know, being a parent
is a big responsibility.
Can't be out late like this
roaming the streets.
Dude, we know.
All right then.
Let's go home.
All right, okay.
♪ I'm gonna be a grandpa ♪
♪ A grandpa, a grandpa ♪
♪ Or a Pee-Paw ♪
♪ Or a Pop-Pop ♪
♪ I'm gonna be an Auntie ♪
♪ Or an Auntie ♪
♪ Or a Mimi. ♪
I'm gonna be Joyce.
And if anybody
says the "G" word,
I'm pulling out my blade.