Married with Children (1986–1997): Season 6, Episode 24 - England Show I - full transcript
The Bundys win a free trip to England, courtesy of the village of Lower Uncton, which can rid itself of a centuries long curse by riding the world of male Bundys, and there are only two left, Al and Bud. Back in 1653, an ancestor of Al's, Seamus McBundy, a chauvinist blacksmith, insulted a fat, ugly witch who then imposed a curse on all future Bundys and the town which sits in a time warp of permanent darkness. The Lower Uncton residents, led by historical Winston, and his cohort Igor try to lure Al and Bud in their town limits to kill them end the curse while the rival Upper Uncton residents, led by assassin-for-hire Trevor, must endure they die outside the town so the curse does not get lifted and ruin their reputation as a tourist town.
Shamus McBundy, are
you done with me horse?
Uh, no, ma'am.
I had to send
out for extra parts
to reinforce its feet.
That and a sign to go
'round his neck sayin',
"I'm with fatso."
You save your tongue
for picking the flies
off the pools that dance
beneath your arms.
Go to. I'm in an 'urry.
Oh?
Is it the festival of pork pies
and pig swallow you're late for?
While you're waiting,
I've got a plum pony out
back you can snack on.
You been warned.
I am a great and powerful witch.
Not as powerful as yon
mighty seams in yon dress
to keep yon belly off yon floor.
That's it.
I curse thee, Shamus McBundy,
and all thy male descendants.
Henceforth ye shall only
shoe the large and ungrateful.
Ooh! Yikes! Saveth me!
And so that ye and all
your male descendants
will be hated in
this place forever,
Lower Uncton shall
always be in darkness,
though other towns
nearby stand in sun.
Well, will you be floating
above us blocking the sun?
Just for that, throughout
eternity your feet will sweat.
Aye, and verily smell.
How could yon
blubber belly curse me?
I hurled the unspooning
stone in the big game.
Had I not married, I
wouldst have turned pro.
And so it begins.
Mmm.
Early to be this dark.
This can't be my life.
What am I, cursed?
All right, now. Ahem.
Ladies and gentlemen,
we are assembled
for our noon meeting.
Mayor Fivshaw presiding.
Now, as we all
know, Lower Uncton
has been in darkness
for four centuries,
and will be so as long
as a male Bundy lives.
I will now call upon
our village historian,
Mr. Winston McPhee,
to take over the meeting.
Winston?
Right. Now, ahem, I
don't have to tell you
it's been a bloody good
year for killing Bundys.
We've tracked them down
wherever Bundys have spread
over the past few centuries.
And in fact, they
were easy to find
because no matter
what the country,
all we had to was go
to the local shoe store,
and... Pfft!
- -there they were.
Now, uh, as you know,
the curse will only be broken
if all Bundys are killed
within our town limits.
And whilst this monumental
task has indeed almost broken us,
I am nevertheless
very happy to announce
that there remains
only this Bundy...
and his son, as the last
male Bundys on Earth.
So the curse will be lifted
if we can bring them here
and force upon them
an agonizing death.
Now, just one question remains:
How do we get them here?
Look, we've just
won a trip to England.
England? Unbelievable.
I know. What's England?
It's a country, Kel.
You know, birthplace
of Shakespeare?
Churchill?
Benny Hill?
Oh, yeah. The English guy.
Oh, I love it when he runs
fast. You know, when they go:
Listen.
Listen!
"You have won an all
expense paid trip to London.
"Then be driven to a
charming, shaded village
and stay in a castle."
Where I'll be the guest of honor
at a quaint Elizabethan
expiration ceremony.
What's that? Who
cares? It's free.
How did we get so lucky?
Well, it says here that they put
all the names of everyone
in the world in a hat,
and drew ours.
I can't believe this.
It's all expense paid.
I haven't been this happy
since I lived with my parents.
Oh, man. I'm gonna get me
an armful of British babes.
I'll be irresistible.
'Cause after years of drinking
their warm domestic ale,
they'll learn that
nothing beats a Bud.
Well, just remember that the
inflatable women over there
blow up on the left side.
No! No!
Kids, now, hey!
You got a lot of time to fight.
Now, I say this is a
momentous occasion
and I think we should have
a hearty "Whoa, England."
Whoa, England!
Hi.
We're going away for a while
and wanted you to know where
since you'd worry and wonder.
Yep, I'm taking Marcie
on an expensive trip
to Epcot Center in Florida.
Gee, Epcot Center in Florida.
Well, that kinda makes our
little trip pale in comparison.
We're going to England.
Can I get a "Whoa,
England"? Oh, yeah.
Whoa, England!
Honey, they're
"whoa-ing" England.
And you're taking me
to the state of swamps?
I wanna "Whoa, England" too.
Hey, you can "whoa"
anywhere in the world,
but we're going to Florida.
Heh. We were just kidding
about going to Florida.
Jefferson's taking
me to England too.
Uh, how am I doing that, dear?
I'm selling your car.
Hey, that car was a
gift for sexual favors.
I worked my ass
off for that car!
We're going to England!
Oh, boy!
We're going to England.
♪ Bom-bom-bom-bom ♪
♪ Nobody knows
The trouble I've seen ♪
♪ Nobody knows but me ♪
If you dogs mess your cages,
I'm not cleaning it up. Ever!
Hey, I could be a
good friend to you.
Tonight, in the flea
bath, a real good friend.
Yep, I'm one lucky dog.
This is your captain speaking.
Will the gentleman in 24B
please put his shoes back on?
I'm choking to death.
Al!
Oh, please.
They show us the movie
Dutch, and they think I stink?
Take a look around, son.
You won't see this back home.
Dad, it's an airport.
Yeah, but this time we're not
dressed like Hare Krishnas,
begging for spare change.
Welcome to London.
What's that, honey?
Oh, it's my English-to-English
translation book.
"Welcome to London.
Welcome To London..."
Ten hours on a plane with
that man and those feet.
I can't wait to change.
My clothes smell
like corroded toes.
Well, don't blame me.
For 10,000 bucks less
we could be sniffing
the sweet feet of Mike Fink
on his keelboat ride.
Hey, there's a word I recognize.
That's our name, honey.
Hello, hello. Lovely to see
you. Right. Now, I'm Winston.
I'm your driver, right?
And this is my
assistant driver, Igor.
Igor? Yes.
You know perfectly well I
had my name changed legally.
Is it too much trouble
to address me as Merryl?
I'll call you Merryl when
we're alone, all right?
And when was the last
time we were alone? Hmm?
Not in front of the Yanks.
I'm terribly sorry.
As I was saying,
we shall be escorting
you, but, uh, before we go,
there's just one
little formality.
It's, um, just for
the record, really.
Um, are there any
more male Bundys? Hm?
Women wish there were.
No! Not here. Look,
just remember, they must die
in Lower Uncton and not before.
Got it? Good.
Um, follow me. Car's outside.
Have a nice journey, did you?
Thank you, Igor.
Ha-ha. Okey-dokey.
We're gonna start
our tour right away
with an immediate
visit to a quaint,
little English village,
Lower Uncton.
Ah, we don't wanna go there.
We wanna go to London.
London? No, no, no. No.
Very little to see in London.
Very dirty and it's
all quite old too.
No, Lower Uncton.
Hey, nice car.
Ooh, let's buy one.
Jefferson, they're putting
our luggage into their trunk.
I know. It's all part
of my master plan.
Look, this is a comp
trip for them, right?
All we have to do
is stay close to them.
At the very least we should
get a free limo ride into town.
They left with our luggage!
Let's get a cab and follow them.
No, we can't.
I put all our money
and our traveler's checks
in our baggage.
See, I didn't wanna have any
unsightly bulges in my jacket.
Well, honey, good news.
Soon you won't have
any in your pants either.
Ow! Ow! Ow!
Ow! Oh! Hey! Hey!
That is St. Paul's Cathedral.
Great.
There's Parliament.
Great.
Tower Bridge.
Great.
And that's Trafalgar Square.
Great.
Oh, look. Buckingham Palace.
Great.
Look, a McDonald's.
Peg, quick! Get the camera.
I see something else.
Stop the car. Stop the car!
Oh, I smell many
women happily shopping.
This is Harrods.
You really must see it.
You've seen it. Let's go.
Ah, I feel somewhat
drawn to this place.
Would there be
enough in your budget
for me to do a little shopping?
Uh, well, maybe just
a very little shopping.
Ah, I mean, we're
a very poor village.
Mom, can we get
stuff for us too?
If there's time.
Mom, can we go get
something for us now?
No time. Heh.
That's the lot, sir.
Right. Thank you.
Yeah. Money, money.
Send more money.
I've never seen
shopping like it.
What? Oh, I don't know.
Just, oh, sell something.
For God's sake.
Well, Marlboro.
Winston.
That's much cooler. We're ready.
Lower Uncton? Shall we
go to Lower Uncton now?
Are you kidding?
We wanna see everything,
we wanna do everything.
The Bundys swing
like a pendulum do.
First, take me to
your finest bathroom.
Fine.
Marcie, can I ride on
the bus now for a while?
No. You've been a bad boy.
Besides, we only had
enough money for one ticket.
Well, then can I stop at
Harrods for a cool drink of water?
Shut up.
Don't you think I'm thirsty too?
But we have to find the Bundys
and get our luggage back.
Now, where did they
say they were staying?
London.
Well, then it's only
a matter of time.
Come on.
Ah!
Quit embarrassing me!
Ah, come on! Come on! Come on!
I don't wanna!
According to legend,
no one can make
the guards smile.
Watch this.
Excuse me, is that a hat,
or are you just a member of
the British Hair Club for Men?
Let me at him.
My husband sells
women's shoes for a living.
Leave this to me.
I've made men come out of comas.
I'm stupid too.
I'm gonna give it one more try.
That's not a smile.
It will be when I take it away.
Brava!
What's this?
Well, Winston says
this is Speakers' Corner.
People come here to
listen to just about any idiot
spout off about anything
that's bothering him. Heh.
I'd like to talk to you
today about women.
I don't like 'em.
Now, I mean, you
folks are English,
but, uh, even you
can't like women.
I mean, you're sitting
home watching sports,
and that's the
exact time they pick
to plant their ever-widening,
what you call "bums,"
next to you, and they ask,
"Remember that restaurant
we went to 18 years ago?
Did you think that
waitress was pretty?"
Then you tell them to
shut up and they get mad.
Then they start to
cry, then you get mad
'cause you can't hear the game.
Which I think was their
modus operandi all along.
Now I'm not
proposing a solution,
'cause, uh, I gotta go
soon, I see my wife looking.
But I just wanna say,
I don't like 'em.
Can I get a hearty, "Whoa,
women. I don't like 'em"?
Whoa, women! I don't like 'em!
Oh, by the way, am I alone
here in hating the French?
No!
I thought not.
Any more bright ideas,
Mr. A-Little-Counterfeiting-
Never-Hurt-Anyone?
As God is my witness,
I thought Michael Caine
was on the 5-pound note.
It's the queen.
Just our luck, we
run into the one guy
who can tell the difference.
Here I am on my dream vacation,
stuck in an alley,
freezing cold,
starving and married to you.
Excuse me,
but do you remember
that time last winter
when I asked you to tape
an episode of Full
House and you forgot?
Did I get mad? No.
I just sat there
and sulked silently.
But I am hurting inside.
You stink, Marcie.
Don't you push it, Jefferson.
You're not that good in bed.
Oh, come on.
We both know I am.
Now relax, babe.
It's your good fortune to
be married to a criminal
and an inveterate liar.
I'll come up with a scheme.
It's gonna have
to be very special
because the British are
a bit more sophisticated
than the Americans.
I got it. It's brilliant.
Come on, take the picture, Bud.
Shoe salesman.
Al, I don't think we can
fit all this stuff in the limo.
Eh, who cares? We didn't
want all this junk anyway.
Oh, uh, Lucky Strike.
Winston. Winston. What?
No need to get snippy.
I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
Where we going now?
Ah, Lower Uncton,
that's where we're going.
That's where it's all
happening, you know?
The birthplace of The Beatles.
Uh... Camels.
Win-ston.
Whatever.
Look, we're tired of
just driving around.
What is your finest hotel?
The Savoy. Oh!
What, uh... What Igor
really meant to say
is it's the, uh,
fabulous dumpster
by the Ritz in Lower Uncton.
Didn't you, Igor?
No, I think they'll
like the Savoy.
Anyway, I've never been
there and I want to go.
To the Savoy then,
Benson & Hedges.
Winston. Winston!
Oh, this is so wonderful.
I hope it never ends.
There they are.
They're staying in London.
They should be easy targets.
Remember, they've got to
be killed outside Lower Uncton.
The future of our
village depends on it.
Yes, every Upper
Uncton schoolboy knows it.
If Lower Uncton
gets the sun again,
then Upper Uncton
will lose all its prosperity
as a tourist town.
Mm-hm.
Every year, thousands of people
come to our town to
view our neighbors.
The village cursed to
inky, hellish darkness.
I know better than anyone.
My father owns the
T-shirt concession.
Remember, they must be
killed outside Lower Uncton,
or the curse goes on forever.
Don't worry.
The Bundys will never
leave London alive.
you done with me horse?
Uh, no, ma'am.
I had to send
out for extra parts
to reinforce its feet.
That and a sign to go
'round his neck sayin',
"I'm with fatso."
You save your tongue
for picking the flies
off the pools that dance
beneath your arms.
Go to. I'm in an 'urry.
Oh?
Is it the festival of pork pies
and pig swallow you're late for?
While you're waiting,
I've got a plum pony out
back you can snack on.
You been warned.
I am a great and powerful witch.
Not as powerful as yon
mighty seams in yon dress
to keep yon belly off yon floor.
That's it.
I curse thee, Shamus McBundy,
and all thy male descendants.
Henceforth ye shall only
shoe the large and ungrateful.
Ooh! Yikes! Saveth me!
And so that ye and all
your male descendants
will be hated in
this place forever,
Lower Uncton shall
always be in darkness,
though other towns
nearby stand in sun.
Well, will you be floating
above us blocking the sun?
Just for that, throughout
eternity your feet will sweat.
Aye, and verily smell.
How could yon
blubber belly curse me?
I hurled the unspooning
stone in the big game.
Had I not married, I
wouldst have turned pro.
And so it begins.
Mmm.
Early to be this dark.
This can't be my life.
What am I, cursed?
All right, now. Ahem.
Ladies and gentlemen,
we are assembled
for our noon meeting.
Mayor Fivshaw presiding.
Now, as we all
know, Lower Uncton
has been in darkness
for four centuries,
and will be so as long
as a male Bundy lives.
I will now call upon
our village historian,
Mr. Winston McPhee,
to take over the meeting.
Winston?
Right. Now, ahem, I
don't have to tell you
it's been a bloody good
year for killing Bundys.
We've tracked them down
wherever Bundys have spread
over the past few centuries.
And in fact, they
were easy to find
because no matter
what the country,
all we had to was go
to the local shoe store,
and... Pfft!
- -there they were.
Now, uh, as you know,
the curse will only be broken
if all Bundys are killed
within our town limits.
And whilst this monumental
task has indeed almost broken us,
I am nevertheless
very happy to announce
that there remains
only this Bundy...
and his son, as the last
male Bundys on Earth.
So the curse will be lifted
if we can bring them here
and force upon them
an agonizing death.
Now, just one question remains:
How do we get them here?
Look, we've just
won a trip to England.
England? Unbelievable.
I know. What's England?
It's a country, Kel.
You know, birthplace
of Shakespeare?
Churchill?
Benny Hill?
Oh, yeah. The English guy.
Oh, I love it when he runs
fast. You know, when they go:
Listen.
Listen!
"You have won an all
expense paid trip to London.
"Then be driven to a
charming, shaded village
and stay in a castle."
Where I'll be the guest of honor
at a quaint Elizabethan
expiration ceremony.
What's that? Who
cares? It's free.
How did we get so lucky?
Well, it says here that they put
all the names of everyone
in the world in a hat,
and drew ours.
I can't believe this.
It's all expense paid.
I haven't been this happy
since I lived with my parents.
Oh, man. I'm gonna get me
an armful of British babes.
I'll be irresistible.
'Cause after years of drinking
their warm domestic ale,
they'll learn that
nothing beats a Bud.
Well, just remember that the
inflatable women over there
blow up on the left side.
No! No!
Kids, now, hey!
You got a lot of time to fight.
Now, I say this is a
momentous occasion
and I think we should have
a hearty "Whoa, England."
Whoa, England!
Hi.
We're going away for a while
and wanted you to know where
since you'd worry and wonder.
Yep, I'm taking Marcie
on an expensive trip
to Epcot Center in Florida.
Gee, Epcot Center in Florida.
Well, that kinda makes our
little trip pale in comparison.
We're going to England.
Can I get a "Whoa,
England"? Oh, yeah.
Whoa, England!
Honey, they're
"whoa-ing" England.
And you're taking me
to the state of swamps?
I wanna "Whoa, England" too.
Hey, you can "whoa"
anywhere in the world,
but we're going to Florida.
Heh. We were just kidding
about going to Florida.
Jefferson's taking
me to England too.
Uh, how am I doing that, dear?
I'm selling your car.
Hey, that car was a
gift for sexual favors.
I worked my ass
off for that car!
We're going to England!
Oh, boy!
We're going to England.
♪ Bom-bom-bom-bom ♪
♪ Nobody knows
The trouble I've seen ♪
♪ Nobody knows but me ♪
If you dogs mess your cages,
I'm not cleaning it up. Ever!
Hey, I could be a
good friend to you.
Tonight, in the flea
bath, a real good friend.
Yep, I'm one lucky dog.
This is your captain speaking.
Will the gentleman in 24B
please put his shoes back on?
I'm choking to death.
Al!
Oh, please.
They show us the movie
Dutch, and they think I stink?
Take a look around, son.
You won't see this back home.
Dad, it's an airport.
Yeah, but this time we're not
dressed like Hare Krishnas,
begging for spare change.
Welcome to London.
What's that, honey?
Oh, it's my English-to-English
translation book.
"Welcome to London.
Welcome To London..."
Ten hours on a plane with
that man and those feet.
I can't wait to change.
My clothes smell
like corroded toes.
Well, don't blame me.
For 10,000 bucks less
we could be sniffing
the sweet feet of Mike Fink
on his keelboat ride.
Hey, there's a word I recognize.
That's our name, honey.
Hello, hello. Lovely to see
you. Right. Now, I'm Winston.
I'm your driver, right?
And this is my
assistant driver, Igor.
Igor? Yes.
You know perfectly well I
had my name changed legally.
Is it too much trouble
to address me as Merryl?
I'll call you Merryl when
we're alone, all right?
And when was the last
time we were alone? Hmm?
Not in front of the Yanks.
I'm terribly sorry.
As I was saying,
we shall be escorting
you, but, uh, before we go,
there's just one
little formality.
It's, um, just for
the record, really.
Um, are there any
more male Bundys? Hm?
Women wish there were.
No! Not here. Look,
just remember, they must die
in Lower Uncton and not before.
Got it? Good.
Um, follow me. Car's outside.
Have a nice journey, did you?
Thank you, Igor.
Ha-ha. Okey-dokey.
We're gonna start
our tour right away
with an immediate
visit to a quaint,
little English village,
Lower Uncton.
Ah, we don't wanna go there.
We wanna go to London.
London? No, no, no. No.
Very little to see in London.
Very dirty and it's
all quite old too.
No, Lower Uncton.
Hey, nice car.
Ooh, let's buy one.
Jefferson, they're putting
our luggage into their trunk.
I know. It's all part
of my master plan.
Look, this is a comp
trip for them, right?
All we have to do
is stay close to them.
At the very least we should
get a free limo ride into town.
They left with our luggage!
Let's get a cab and follow them.
No, we can't.
I put all our money
and our traveler's checks
in our baggage.
See, I didn't wanna have any
unsightly bulges in my jacket.
Well, honey, good news.
Soon you won't have
any in your pants either.
Ow! Ow! Ow!
Ow! Oh! Hey! Hey!
That is St. Paul's Cathedral.
Great.
There's Parliament.
Great.
Tower Bridge.
Great.
And that's Trafalgar Square.
Great.
Oh, look. Buckingham Palace.
Great.
Look, a McDonald's.
Peg, quick! Get the camera.
I see something else.
Stop the car. Stop the car!
Oh, I smell many
women happily shopping.
This is Harrods.
You really must see it.
You've seen it. Let's go.
Ah, I feel somewhat
drawn to this place.
Would there be
enough in your budget
for me to do a little shopping?
Uh, well, maybe just
a very little shopping.
Ah, I mean, we're
a very poor village.
Mom, can we get
stuff for us too?
If there's time.
Mom, can we go get
something for us now?
No time. Heh.
That's the lot, sir.
Right. Thank you.
Yeah. Money, money.
Send more money.
I've never seen
shopping like it.
What? Oh, I don't know.
Just, oh, sell something.
For God's sake.
Well, Marlboro.
Winston.
That's much cooler. We're ready.
Lower Uncton? Shall we
go to Lower Uncton now?
Are you kidding?
We wanna see everything,
we wanna do everything.
The Bundys swing
like a pendulum do.
First, take me to
your finest bathroom.
Fine.
Marcie, can I ride on
the bus now for a while?
No. You've been a bad boy.
Besides, we only had
enough money for one ticket.
Well, then can I stop at
Harrods for a cool drink of water?
Shut up.
Don't you think I'm thirsty too?
But we have to find the Bundys
and get our luggage back.
Now, where did they
say they were staying?
London.
Well, then it's only
a matter of time.
Come on.
Ah!
Quit embarrassing me!
Ah, come on! Come on! Come on!
I don't wanna!
According to legend,
no one can make
the guards smile.
Watch this.
Excuse me, is that a hat,
or are you just a member of
the British Hair Club for Men?
Let me at him.
My husband sells
women's shoes for a living.
Leave this to me.
I've made men come out of comas.
I'm stupid too.
I'm gonna give it one more try.
That's not a smile.
It will be when I take it away.
Brava!
What's this?
Well, Winston says
this is Speakers' Corner.
People come here to
listen to just about any idiot
spout off about anything
that's bothering him. Heh.
I'd like to talk to you
today about women.
I don't like 'em.
Now, I mean, you
folks are English,
but, uh, even you
can't like women.
I mean, you're sitting
home watching sports,
and that's the
exact time they pick
to plant their ever-widening,
what you call "bums,"
next to you, and they ask,
"Remember that restaurant
we went to 18 years ago?
Did you think that
waitress was pretty?"
Then you tell them to
shut up and they get mad.
Then they start to
cry, then you get mad
'cause you can't hear the game.
Which I think was their
modus operandi all along.
Now I'm not
proposing a solution,
'cause, uh, I gotta go
soon, I see my wife looking.
But I just wanna say,
I don't like 'em.
Can I get a hearty, "Whoa,
women. I don't like 'em"?
Whoa, women! I don't like 'em!
Oh, by the way, am I alone
here in hating the French?
No!
I thought not.
Any more bright ideas,
Mr. A-Little-Counterfeiting-
Never-Hurt-Anyone?
As God is my witness,
I thought Michael Caine
was on the 5-pound note.
It's the queen.
Just our luck, we
run into the one guy
who can tell the difference.
Here I am on my dream vacation,
stuck in an alley,
freezing cold,
starving and married to you.
Excuse me,
but do you remember
that time last winter
when I asked you to tape
an episode of Full
House and you forgot?
Did I get mad? No.
I just sat there
and sulked silently.
But I am hurting inside.
You stink, Marcie.
Don't you push it, Jefferson.
You're not that good in bed.
Oh, come on.
We both know I am.
Now relax, babe.
It's your good fortune to
be married to a criminal
and an inveterate liar.
I'll come up with a scheme.
It's gonna have
to be very special
because the British are
a bit more sophisticated
than the Americans.
I got it. It's brilliant.
Come on, take the picture, Bud.
Shoe salesman.
Al, I don't think we can
fit all this stuff in the limo.
Eh, who cares? We didn't
want all this junk anyway.
Oh, uh, Lucky Strike.
Winston. Winston. What?
No need to get snippy.
I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
Where we going now?
Ah, Lower Uncton,
that's where we're going.
That's where it's all
happening, you know?
The birthplace of The Beatles.
Uh... Camels.
Win-ston.
Whatever.
Look, we're tired of
just driving around.
What is your finest hotel?
The Savoy. Oh!
What, uh... What Igor
really meant to say
is it's the, uh,
fabulous dumpster
by the Ritz in Lower Uncton.
Didn't you, Igor?
No, I think they'll
like the Savoy.
Anyway, I've never been
there and I want to go.
To the Savoy then,
Benson & Hedges.
Winston. Winston!
Oh, this is so wonderful.
I hope it never ends.
There they are.
They're staying in London.
They should be easy targets.
Remember, they've got to
be killed outside Lower Uncton.
The future of our
village depends on it.
Yes, every Upper
Uncton schoolboy knows it.
If Lower Uncton
gets the sun again,
then Upper Uncton
will lose all its prosperity
as a tourist town.
Mm-hm.
Every year, thousands of people
come to our town to
view our neighbors.
The village cursed to
inky, hellish darkness.
I know better than anyone.
My father owns the
T-shirt concession.
Remember, they must be
killed outside Lower Uncton,
or the curse goes on forever.
Don't worry.
The Bundys will never
leave London alive.