MacGyver (1985–1992): Season 1, Episode 19 - Slow Death - full transcript

( Train horn blowing )

( Men speaking native language )

Man: Once again, bartender.

Thank you.

MacGyver: I've been kind of busy

Intercepting some
plans for a guerrilla raid.

Mother, look.

Trouble is, it's nearly
made me miss my train.

Look, he's thumbing
a ride from us.

Of course.

Your generation
hasn't enough discipline



to catch a train on time.

I didn't mean to start
a whole thing, mother.

And considering
who was after me...

Hey, come on!

I'd just as soon
not miss my train.

Come on, please!

( Laughter )

I guess he missed
his connection.

Yeah.

Come on! Slow it down!

Stop that train!

Come on, I got a
ticket. I promise.

- No, no, go away.
- Please!

It is too dangerous.



I can't.

Slow down!

Go away! Go!

Are we going to stop for him?

That's up to the engineer.

No, no!

Please! Come on! I need a ride!

Oh, okay.

You're a gentleman.
You're beautiful.

Hi. Sorry about the holdup...

So to speak.

Hey, you're American.

Aw, you got me on that one.

Woman: So are we.

Name's MacGyver.

Andy Ellis, and
I'm Laura Dillon.

Welcome aboard.

Hi. Thanks.

You're lucky you made it.

No more stops from
here to the coast.

Take any empty seat.

Well, thanks, but you
could make my day

if you told me I could
get something to eat.

Right there in
the dining section.

Terrific.

Amazing how that works out.

Excuse me.

You got a pen?

Yeah.

Thanks.

You're welcome.

( Speaking native language )

( Train horn blowing )

I'll have a roast lamb sandwich.

Big. Enormous.

Surely not naked,
unadorned meat?

MacGyver: Well, no, they usually
slap a couple of pieces of bread

on either side.

No, no, no, what I refer to is

food's blessed
accompaniment, drink.

What is it you
Americans Cherish?

Bourbon and rye on the rocks?

Well, actually, I'd
like a glass of milk,

please.

How disgustingly healthy.

I'm James Grant.

MacGyver.

Very nice to meet you.

We shall be on this
misbegotten excuse

for a railway through
a long dusty ride.

And if we don't at
least drink together,

why, we shall have
to drink separately.

( Brakes squealing )

Ow!

Are you all right?

It's so damned stupid of me!

No, no, come on now.

It takes time.

Very observant of
you, Mr. MacGyver,

though it has been seven weeks.

I'm so sorry. I...

Don't cluck over me, woman!

I'm a cripple.

You're black.

Neither is a condition
for sympathy.

Sorry.

It's okay.

I noticed my color
a long time ago.

He's just hurting.

Andrea Collins.

MacGyver.

Mind if I join you?

I was hoping you'd ask.

That was quite
a stunt you pulled

after the way you,

uh, broke the speed of
light trying to catch this train.

What's the rush?

Well, I'm a tourist.

I didn't want to
miss the scenic ride.

Uh-huh.

I work for the state department.

Courier.

Uh-huh.

And I know urgent when I see it.

All right, the truth.

I just hijacked proof of
an illegal arms-oil deal,

and if I get the proof
out of the country in time,

I could help
thwart a little war.

I was in a hurry.

Okay, I deserved that.

We're just a couple of tourists
enjoying the pretty scenery.

From where I sit, the
scenery's very pretty.

Why? Just tell me.

Andy, I told you.

You know how I feel about you.

Aw, come on, Laura, it's
more than just a feeling.

Don't be afraid to use the word.

I'm not.

Love.

Like in I love you.

Andy...

Look, we'll be in
rajmir in two days.

Be home in one more.

We could get
married a week later.

Or as soon as our
families cool down.

No. How long have
we known each other?

It's not how long.

It's how good.

We met in Barcelona.

Got along... okay.

It was better than okay.

Yeah, a lot better than okay.

Good fun,

Good feelings.

Good everything.

All the pieces fit.

Yeah, for a fun summer, sure.

But marriage...

Ooh, marriage is different.

I know.

And it's what I want.

I thought it would
be what you want.

It is.

That's why I want
to be damned sure.

I lived through a
divorce when I was 12.

I'm not going to go
through one of my own.

What do I say?

Trust me?

Gamble on me?

Love me.

I guess that's what we both say.

I owe you an apology.

That you do. Make it good.

You're forgiven.

Oh, but... I must
make proper amends.

Find a treasure,

buy a drink, slay a dragon...

Oh!

Oh, I'm so sorry.

It's all right.
It, it's all right.

The sight of beauty
invariably dizzies me.

The stink of liquor does the
same thing for me, Mr. Grant.

Come along, Diana.

I'm sorry.

If you're going
to slay a dragon,

I know where you can find one.

Here, here.

( Horn blowing )

Everybody, keep in your seats!

This train is now
in our control!

Sit down!

Keep down!

You bloody St... You can't...

( Gunshot )

Oh, my...!

Be quiet! Be careful!
Nobody will be hurt!

You may have
already killed that man.

Gunman: It was an accident!

I'm a doctor.

And verifiably non-belligerent.

Let me pass.

I can use some help.

I can help.

Diana, don't be foolish.

You have absolutely
no experience.

You'll only be a hindrance.

We are not bandits!

Oh yeah? What is it you want?

Two men... who
are on this train.

It is a matter of justice.

I don't understand.

You don't have to understand.

We will find them.

And when we have found them,

we will execute them.

How is he?

With a bullet in him?

I've got him stabilized.

MacGyver: A man
puts a gun to my head

and says he's not a terrorist...

I take it with a grain of sal.

Grant: He's got tissue
trauma, and he's losing blood.

For now, he's not
getting any worse,

but we can't afford
to take chances.

There's the inevitable shock...

So, we'll have to get him
to a hospital straightaway...

Or he may die.

This is madness!

We didn't want to...

We will get help once we stop.

Are there others
in the sleeping car?

Whoops! Sorry.

( Yelling )

one of the interesting things
about the local moonshine is

it tastes a lot like kerosene,

and it burns even better.

( Men yelling )

There he is!

( Yelling )

Hi.

What in heaven's
name are you up to?

You're the fellow we picked up.

Yeah, right... name's MacGyver.

You also picked up a
couple of hijackers back there.

That's what all
the fuss is about.

They are following
the train on foot,

But they'll never catch us.

Well done, MacGyver.

Thanks.

We shall report the incident

when we get to rajmir.

All right.

What's up ahead?

A trestle bridge.

And once we are
past that bridge,

We are out of
the bandit country.

( Whistle blowing )

I think we can pick up speed.

Engineer seems to
be in a bit of a rush.

( Men speaking native language)

I'd say we're bound
to see more trouble

before we see rajmir.

They cannot stop a moving train.

( Gunshot )

( Brakes squealing )

( Brakes squealing )

( Brakes squealing )

( Engine hissing )

( Men shouting )

Man: Hurry, quickly!

Everyone to the
train! Quick! Go!

( Gunshot )

What are you doing?

I'm going to rig it

So nobody but
you or I can start it.

Good.

MacGyver: We got
enough voltage here

So if anyone fiddles with
it, it'll uncurl his beard.

- ( Gunshot )
- Everybody off the train!

Search the train!

Bring me the westerners!

Man: Do not move!

( Gunshot )

Everybody, out!

Out now!

( Shouting in native language)

Out! Out! Out, I say!

Oh, my lord!

Outside! All of you!

No, please!

Is he... dead?

Dr. Grant and I can't leave.

Diana, this has
nothing to do with us.

Now, don't be stupid.

Grant: I would have
said she's admirable.

You said you were
an honorable man.

Is it honorable to let
a wounded man die?

The woman can stay.

Everybody else, out.

I'll be back as
soon as possible.

Keep him warm,

and don't be frightened.

I can't help it... I am.

I know.

That's why you're admirable.

We have all the
passengers off the train.

This is my train, my engine!

I am responsible
for these people!

Easy there, easy, big fella.

What are you going
to do with them

and the others
you're taking away?

Man: They will be
quite safe at our village

until this is over.

MacGyver: Till what is over?

Man: You are here
to answer questions,

Not ask them.

What is your name?

MacGyver.

Now, if you got a
problem with me or us,

don't take it out on them.

Man: They will not
be hurt, MacGyver.

My business is with you.

All of you.

My name is Hassan.

These are my
people, our village.

Will you cut to the point?

In my good time!

We are a poor people
in a hard country.

To make our lives

a little better, to do something

worthwhile, we
set a place apart,

a clinic

for the sick.

For the children.

All of us gave money,
whatever we could afford,

And we bought medicines
and drugs in chattur.

From two westerners.

Two... businessmen.

Americans or English.

They were paid a
great deal of money.

But what has that to do with us?

Only... that when our people
took your medicines, 26 died.

One of those who died was...

My son.

We were sold poisons!

By two of you.

For the money.

Who?

He doesn't know that.

Otherwise he'd be
on them right now.

You have an eye for the truth

behind the truth, Mr. MacGyver.

I don't know.

So... you will tell me.

That's ridiculous!

We have no idea who the men are.

Then find them!

Among yourselves.

You will give me
these murderers,

and to help you in
your efforts to find them,

There will be no food,
no water, until you do.

They took all the
food... And the water.

Kind of makes sense, doesn't it?

He's trying to put
pressure on us.

Yeah, he's still
checkin' out the luggage.

Doesn't seem to have
found anything yet.

We're just going to
have to find those men.

Oh, right, and turn
them over to be killed.

Is that it?

Do we have any volunteers?

MacGyver: Well,
the way I see it,

we've got two things
to consider here.

First of all, can we
identify the two men.

And secondly, if
we do find them,

do we turn two people
over to be killed?

Andy: Are you thirsty, Laura?

Laura: Very. I
guess everybody is.

I was thinking...

If I could get past the guards,

maybe I could steal a horse

Or even follow the tracks
until I found some help.

Laura: Andy, we're in
the middle of nowhere.

Anyway, with all
those guards out there,

It's too dangerous.

What are we gonna do?

I mean, this is not my
idea of a fun experience.

Maybe if we could get
word out to the police

Or to the embassy...

I don't see how.

Oh, I'm so scared.

Hey, Laura,

if Hassan was gonna
do anything violent,

it would've happened by now.

A-and as soon as the train's

reported missing...

No... no, we're not
gonna lie to each other.

It'll be a good week

before anybody starts
to worry about us.

So...

All we have to count on is us.

But that's all right.

We'll make it.

That wasn't much.

Oh, I don't know.

He made me feel better.

May I join you?

I was hoping you'd ask that.

( Chuckling )

How come you're not scared?

Well, you know that old saying,

"lord, give me the strength
to deal with what I can,

And endure what I can't"?

Well, I'm enduring.

You know, in a weird way,

You're a comfort, MacGyver.

Yeah?

Yeah.

I scored.

Soda?

They've cut the water off.

At least it's liquid.

A pathetic substitute
for anything else.

( Grunting )

Here, let me.

( Fizzing )

( Grunts )

( Whistling )

I was always strong.

Why do you say strong like
it's some kind of drawback?

Well, it is

if you're oversized

And agonizingly shy.

I've no interest in what
you thought you are,

Only in what you are.

A woman.

A very exciting woman.

Half a compliment
from half a man.

No! No...

I, uh... i'm...

Correction, I was a surgeon.

Before the accident.

A damned good one.

But now i'm...

Quite useless, you see.

You're still a doctor.

You knew what to do for him.

You've kept him alive.

I don't call that useless.

- ( Grimaces in pain )
- What is it?

Oh! Forgive me, it's...

Sometimes the
fingers hurt like hell.

The fingers?

Mm.

It's ghost pain.

It's a phenomenon of amputation.

The body remembers
what's no longer there.

Oh, my, I wish I
could do something.

Oh, you have.

You've allowed
me to talk about it.

I didn't think I could.

Would it be awful if
I asked you... how?

How?

( Laughs )

It was really stupid.

I was in London.

I was stitching up a stab wound

in the emergency
room of a hospital, and

suddenly, the doors
were kicked open,

and this wild-eyed
man was there,

wielding a-a sawn-off shotgun.

A maniac?

Drugged... Out of his mind.

I remember thinking,
"if he fires that,

"there's half a dozen
people in this room,

Any of them could
be killed or maimed."

How dreadful.

Well, i-i, you know,

I think I've seen probably
too many Hollywood movies,

but instead of
just staying there

and staying absolutely still,

I took a step towards him.

And I extended my arm.

And then I said something
absolutely stupid like...

I think you better
hand me that gun.

And he shot you?

Yes. I was so close to him

that the blast
from the gun just...

Disintegrated my arm.

Fortunately, no one
else was-was hurt.

By such mad improbabilities
are dreams destroyed.

I'm sorry.

Well, that's my story.

Now, what's yours?

What do you want out of life?

To be purposeful.

To be useful.

To be needed.

Oh, lord!

You are.

You are needed.

What's that?

It's a bottle spout I've
made into a whistle.

Collins: A dog whistle?

Yeah, sort of.

It's pitched above human
range, but animals can hear it.

And if I've done it right,

They're gonna be none
too happy with the sound.

( Faint, high-pitched tone )

( Horse whinnying )

Hassan: Whoa. Whoa, boy, down!

Down, boy.

( Neighing )

Easy. Easy.

( Crickets chirping,
horse sputtering )

He is usually very docile.

Guard duty tonight, Hassan?

It is necessary.

How is he, the man
who was wounded?

He might die.

We did not want that.

Come on, Hassan.

You hijacked a train by force.

To make a just end.

To take payment for murder.

My son died.

Badur's brother.

Laila from the next village

lost her three children,

the youngest, not
yet able to walk.

She was not much younger

than the little
child with the doll.

It is a terrible thing

To see a child die.

I'm sorry.

Please believe me.

We're all sorry.

Hassan: We worked
together, all of us,

to build a clinic
for the children

And for my son.

Pride is a sin.

And god struck me for my pride

in my son.

Your son gave the medicine?

Hassan: With a needle.

First to himself,

So the children would
not be frightened.

So, they were brave.

And I was proud.

And they died.

So, you're going to
avenge death by killing.

I will do what I must.

You're still proud, Hassan.

But taking more lives
won't bring your son back.

Find me the men, MacGyver.

And then go.

I feel for that man.

He has a right.

But he's wrong.

( Birds singing )

Another day.

A whole nother set
of fresh possibilities.

I'm a sucker for mornings.

( Men talking in
the background )

( Grunts )

( Men talking
increases in volume )

( Grunting )

( Panting )

Hey, where are you going?

Hey! Stop! Stop, I say!

- Stop!
- ( Grunts )

- ( Gunshots )
- I will have your head!

Andy! Oh!

( Gunshots )

( Grunting )

- ( Neighing )
- Hassan: Whoa, whoa!

Whoa!

I got him, I got him!

Hassan: Whoa!

I've got the kid, Hassan!

It's all right! Don't shoot!

If you don't mind my saying
so, that was real dumb.

Andy!

Sorry, babe, I tried.

Oh, because I was so scared.

Oh, Andy...

I thought I was gonna make it.

Until friend Kramer here
blew the whistle on you.

Why?

I'm sorry.

I was, um...

Uh, you startled me, uh, besi...

That's funny.

I got the idea you wanted
to see the kid get nailed.

Take the heat off
everybody else.

Especially you.

Kramer: That's not true!

Search him.

Oh, go ahead.

I've nothing to hide.

Maybe you wouldn't mind

If we took a look in
your compartment.

( Bed squeaks )

It is mine.

I-I was simply afraid that
you'd steal it, that's all.

I never sold poison to anyone.

Paper.

We paid in gold.

He is no doubt a thief...

And a liar.

But he is not the
man I am looking for.

You know, Hassan,

You just gave me an idea.

MacGyver: One of the best
ways to get inside a man's mind

is to go through his body.

Grant: With my sphygmomanometer?

MacGyver: Well, a
human being can try to lie,

but the funny thing is,

The body always has
a way of telling the truth.

All I have to do is
cannibalize your medical kit...

borrow an alarm clock
and build us a translator.

Grant: MacGyver.

You have a remarkable
flair for junk art.

A lie detector's a
simple thing, actually.

When you lie, your
blood pressure goes up

and you sweat.

Sweat creates a
conductance, and, uh,

it'll sound the alarm,

- ( buzzing )
- Like this.

Hmm...

Your son would have understood.

You are right.

Show me.

Okay.

I'm gonna ask you a question.

I want you to lie, all right?

Andy... did you try to escape?

No, I didn't.

( Buzzing )

Do you deal drugs?

No.

Andy, did you sell these
people bad medicine?

No, I didn't, damn it!

No way!

Why did you run away?

For Laura.

Because she was so scared.

I learned I'm not
much of a hero.

Oh, I learned something, too.

When I thought
you might be killed,

I... I just fell apart.

I don't need a hero.

I need you.

( Buzzing )

Um, that was love, not lying.

I almost believe.

Ask the others.

And then...

I will ask you, MacGyver.

No, I don't think so, Hassan.

I'm not gonna put
anybody else through this

until I know what
you're gonna do

with the men once you find them.

Justice!

They will take the
medicines they sold to us.

You'll kill them.

No. They will kill themselves.

Justice.

Nope. That's murder.

What do you want?

If we find the men,

I want you to come
to rajmir with us

where they'll stand trial.

I agree.

On memory of my son.

It's a deal.

You're gonna take his
word for it, just like that?

Yup, I guess I am.

You know, Mr. Webster, I think
you just volunteered to go next.

What do you say?

Have a seat.

Sure. I'll go next.

If you think i'm guilty of this,

you're all crazy.

( Chuckling )

All right, you about ready?

Mr. Webster... did you
sell fake toxic medicines

to Hassan's people?

( Alarm buzzing )

Blade?!

Damn it, Paul, you
said you could handle it!

I can! Give me my damn gun!

We're out of here, anyway.

( Gunshot )

( Groaning )

Don't be a fool, MacGyver.

We can all get out of here.

We'll just back the train
right up through them.

I can't do that.

I gave Hassan my word.

Tough.

Webster, don't do it.

I rigged the
circuits to overload.

They'll blow on you.

You ought to take your own
lie detector test, MacGyver.

Don't do it!

Ah!

Justice.

Make sure you change the
bandage after three days.

There's no sign of an infection.

Thank you, doctor.

Good.

All right, give
Hassan his gold back.

Ah!

Yes.

Would you take this gold
and buy medicines for us?

Good medicines?

But that's like...

Hassan, medicines
aren't like bloody magic.

You... you need a doctor.

I think he's already
got that figured out.

He's looking at a doctor.

Uh-uh, I can't.

I don't practice
medicine anymore.

We would be honored.

( Stifled chuckle )

It's crazy!

I couldn't possibly
take on something like...

Single-handed, so to speak.

You wouldn't have to.

Diana, have you gone
absolutely out of your mind?

My question exactly.

( Sighing ): The answer is yes.

What are you planning on doing?

I don't know...

But for the first
time in my life,

I'm finding out what
kind of person I am.

Well, all I can say
is it's about time.

I think you're all a bit mad.

But if there's anything you need

for this so-called
clinic of yours,

Diana knows where to reach me.

Thank you, mother.

Have a good trip home.

Primitive working
conditions, lousy hours,

monster workload...

No pay...

( People talking )

What a deal.