Looney Tunes Cartoons (2019–…): Season 1, Episode 25 - Bounty Bunny/Hole Gag: Underwear/Vender Bender - full transcript
Sam tries to catch a wanted Bugs Bunny to collect a $5,000 bounty on him. Elmer Fudd tries to catch Bugs Bunny. Porky Pig tries to get the last snack out of a vending machine after it gets stuck.
[theme music playing]
[bird screeching]
[upbeat music playing]
Hmm.
Wanted for jaywalking.
Well, this will be the easiest
five thousand smackaroos
I'll ever make.
[laughs]
And I know just the dirty,
unsavory place
a low down slimeball
like him would hang out.
Ugh.
Just look at this place,
an all-natural pig sty.
That filthy law breaker's
here someplace.
I know it.
[Bugs] Erm...
Who is it you're
looking for, Mac?
I happen to know
everyone in this area
pretty well.
Woah!
Why, you're who
I'm looking for,
you good for nothing,
long-eared carrot pig!
I'm Sam the Bounty Hunter.
And I'm taking you
in to collect
my five thousand smackaroos.
So you have the right
to remain silent,
you filthy varmint.
But Doc, that ain't me.
What are you
talking about?
Of course it's you.
No, it's true.
I only got two whiskers
on each side,
but the guy in this poster
clearly has three.
-Oh! I ain't playing games,
rabbit.
-No,
really, Doc,
the guy you're looking for
is over there.
Huh? Where?
I can't see anybody.
-He's right behind you, Doc!
-Who, behind me? Huh?
Ooh!
I got you now.
[smashes]
[spluttering]
[laughs]
Bounty hunter, he says.
That mook couldn't find
the broad side
of a hippopotamus.
[laughs smugly]
-I always gets my varmint.
-[birds chirping]
Ah, me aching head.
Yup, no one gets away
from Sam the Bounty Hunter.
I'm the finest bounty hunter
west of the equator.
Yes, sir, I am.
I got eyes like a hawk.
If you're thinking
of escaping,
you might as well
lasso the moon, 'cause you...
What the...
Get back here,
you greasy animal.
Now, like I was saying,
I'm such a cunning,
ruthless,
hard boiled son of a gun,
You'd have to be a Navy SEAL
on tippy toes to get
the jump on me.
D-'oh!
Stop doing that!
You...
Now, where was I?
"You'd have to be a Navy SEAL
on tippy toes to get
the jump on me."
Oh, yeah. Right, right.
Now,
I ain't just bragging here,
because I could spot
a varmint
a thousand miles away
in the dark.
And you ain't gonna
slip away that easy.
I'm too sharp,
to aware of my surroundings
to be foiled by some...
Ooh!
Eh, even the best of
us can come undone.
No more funny business.
In you go.
[chuckling]
[Bugs] Dad-blast it!
Let me out!
Let me out, I say.
Huh? Who's in there?
Sam the Bounty Hunter,
that's who.
Sam the...
What are you talking about?
I'm Sam the Bounty Hunter.
-Oh, yeah?
-Yeah!
Well, if you're
Sam the Bounty Hunter,
what did you do
with that there rabbit?
What the...
He plumb disappeared.
Well, don't just
stand there, me.
Get your hide in there
and find him.
You got it, me.
Dang, I'm full of good ideas.
Doggone rabbit.
Playing dress up
is fun and all,
but I'd better get home
before it's dark.
Uh-oh.
Now, keep your
stinking hide right there.
Imma hitchhike us a ride
to the police station.
Eh, whatever you say, mac.
But we're going to be
out here all day with that
hitchhiker's thumb.
What the heck is wrong
with my thumb?
That thing?
No one's gonna see
that pathetic little thumb
at 60 miles per hour.
You gotta make it bigger.
Like this.
[grunts]
Oh, you no-good, stinking...
Wait a second, Kerouac!
Check it out.
It worked.
That truck driver
is slowing down.
[tires screeching]
He just pulled over.
Come on!
[driver] Where are
you two headed?
I'm taking this here jaywalker
to the local police station
to collect my bounty.
I'm worth
five thousand smackaroos.
[driver] Well,
the police station
is on my way, fellows.
But I only got room
for one in the front.
One of you's got to
ride in the back.
Then I'll take the back.
Oh, no, you don't.
And let you escape
without me seeing?
I'm smarter than a dolphin
in a monkey suit.
You're sitting in front.
I'm taking the back.
[sam chuckles]
Stupid rabbit.
Think he can outsmart me.
Well, he can't.
You know what I'm saying,
pack of rabid dogs?
[dogs growling]
-[dogs barking and snarling]
-[Sam] Ow! Ow! Ow!
Toodle-oo!
And thanks again
for the carrot latte.
Not the comfiest seats,
but at least he was friendly.
So, how was your trip?
I'm guessing
not as pleasant.
Okay, sheriff.
Here's your wanted rabbit.
Now, where's my reward?
[sheriff] Sorry, Sam.
That wanted rabbit
already turned himself
in a couple hours ago.
Huh?
Like I said earlier, Doc,
three whiskers, two whiskers.
Ah, but,
five thousand smackaroos.
That means what you did to me
was kidnapping.
Ain't that right, sheriff?
[sheriff] I reckon
the rabbit has a point.
D'oh!
I almost had
five thousand smackaroos.
I hates rabbits.
I hate those cotton-bottomed,
long-eared, buck-toothed,
three whiskered,
carrot eating...
So, you want five thousand
smackaroos, do you?
-One, two, three, four.
-Aw!
[theme music playing]
[whistling]
Oh, my favorite sna... sna...
sna... Eh, grub.
[yelps]
[grunts]
[buzzer sounds]
Insufficient fu... fu... fu...
er, money!
[buzzer sounds]
[grunts]
[buzzer sounds]
[grunting]
[grunting]
Ahem.
That gorp!
[straining]
Oh! Gorp.
[shouting]
[bird screeching]
[upbeat music playing]
Hmm.
Wanted for jaywalking.
Well, this will be the easiest
five thousand smackaroos
I'll ever make.
[laughs]
And I know just the dirty,
unsavory place
a low down slimeball
like him would hang out.
Ugh.
Just look at this place,
an all-natural pig sty.
That filthy law breaker's
here someplace.
I know it.
[Bugs] Erm...
Who is it you're
looking for, Mac?
I happen to know
everyone in this area
pretty well.
Woah!
Why, you're who
I'm looking for,
you good for nothing,
long-eared carrot pig!
I'm Sam the Bounty Hunter.
And I'm taking you
in to collect
my five thousand smackaroos.
So you have the right
to remain silent,
you filthy varmint.
But Doc, that ain't me.
What are you
talking about?
Of course it's you.
No, it's true.
I only got two whiskers
on each side,
but the guy in this poster
clearly has three.
-Oh! I ain't playing games,
rabbit.
-No,
really, Doc,
the guy you're looking for
is over there.
Huh? Where?
I can't see anybody.
-He's right behind you, Doc!
-Who, behind me? Huh?
Ooh!
I got you now.
[smashes]
[spluttering]
[laughs]
Bounty hunter, he says.
That mook couldn't find
the broad side
of a hippopotamus.
[laughs smugly]
-I always gets my varmint.
-[birds chirping]
Ah, me aching head.
Yup, no one gets away
from Sam the Bounty Hunter.
I'm the finest bounty hunter
west of the equator.
Yes, sir, I am.
I got eyes like a hawk.
If you're thinking
of escaping,
you might as well
lasso the moon, 'cause you...
What the...
Get back here,
you greasy animal.
Now, like I was saying,
I'm such a cunning,
ruthless,
hard boiled son of a gun,
You'd have to be a Navy SEAL
on tippy toes to get
the jump on me.
D-'oh!
Stop doing that!
You...
Now, where was I?
"You'd have to be a Navy SEAL
on tippy toes to get
the jump on me."
Oh, yeah. Right, right.
Now,
I ain't just bragging here,
because I could spot
a varmint
a thousand miles away
in the dark.
And you ain't gonna
slip away that easy.
I'm too sharp,
to aware of my surroundings
to be foiled by some...
Ooh!
Eh, even the best of
us can come undone.
No more funny business.
In you go.
[chuckling]
[Bugs] Dad-blast it!
Let me out!
Let me out, I say.
Huh? Who's in there?
Sam the Bounty Hunter,
that's who.
Sam the...
What are you talking about?
I'm Sam the Bounty Hunter.
-Oh, yeah?
-Yeah!
Well, if you're
Sam the Bounty Hunter,
what did you do
with that there rabbit?
What the...
He plumb disappeared.
Well, don't just
stand there, me.
Get your hide in there
and find him.
You got it, me.
Dang, I'm full of good ideas.
Doggone rabbit.
Playing dress up
is fun and all,
but I'd better get home
before it's dark.
Uh-oh.
Now, keep your
stinking hide right there.
Imma hitchhike us a ride
to the police station.
Eh, whatever you say, mac.
But we're going to be
out here all day with that
hitchhiker's thumb.
What the heck is wrong
with my thumb?
That thing?
No one's gonna see
that pathetic little thumb
at 60 miles per hour.
You gotta make it bigger.
Like this.
[grunts]
Oh, you no-good, stinking...
Wait a second, Kerouac!
Check it out.
It worked.
That truck driver
is slowing down.
[tires screeching]
He just pulled over.
Come on!
[driver] Where are
you two headed?
I'm taking this here jaywalker
to the local police station
to collect my bounty.
I'm worth
five thousand smackaroos.
[driver] Well,
the police station
is on my way, fellows.
But I only got room
for one in the front.
One of you's got to
ride in the back.
Then I'll take the back.
Oh, no, you don't.
And let you escape
without me seeing?
I'm smarter than a dolphin
in a monkey suit.
You're sitting in front.
I'm taking the back.
[sam chuckles]
Stupid rabbit.
Think he can outsmart me.
Well, he can't.
You know what I'm saying,
pack of rabid dogs?
[dogs growling]
-[dogs barking and snarling]
-[Sam] Ow! Ow! Ow!
Toodle-oo!
And thanks again
for the carrot latte.
Not the comfiest seats,
but at least he was friendly.
So, how was your trip?
I'm guessing
not as pleasant.
Okay, sheriff.
Here's your wanted rabbit.
Now, where's my reward?
[sheriff] Sorry, Sam.
That wanted rabbit
already turned himself
in a couple hours ago.
Huh?
Like I said earlier, Doc,
three whiskers, two whiskers.
Ah, but,
five thousand smackaroos.
That means what you did to me
was kidnapping.
Ain't that right, sheriff?
[sheriff] I reckon
the rabbit has a point.
D'oh!
I almost had
five thousand smackaroos.
I hates rabbits.
I hate those cotton-bottomed,
long-eared, buck-toothed,
three whiskered,
carrot eating...
So, you want five thousand
smackaroos, do you?
-One, two, three, four.
-Aw!
[theme music playing]
[whistling]
Oh, my favorite sna... sna...
sna... Eh, grub.
[yelps]
[grunts]
[buzzer sounds]
Insufficient fu... fu... fu...
er, money!
[buzzer sounds]
[grunts]
[buzzer sounds]
[grunting]
[grunting]
Ahem.
That gorp!
[straining]
Oh! Gorp.
[shouting]