Looney Tunes Cartoons (2019–…): Season 1, Episode 20 - Shoe Shine-nanigans/Multiply and Conquer/Parky Pig - full transcript

[theme music playing]

[humming]

Hey, shoe shine boy.

Ooh. A wealthy patron.

Need your spats
spit-shined, sir?

[sarcastically] No,
I need my hair cut.

Of course
I need my shoes shined,

you working-class loser.

I need my loafers
prim and proper, fast.

Well, you've come
to the right place,
my good man.

Woo-hoo!



Now, you just sit here
and relax,

and I'll have
your shoes spiffy in a jiffy.

Oh, fine, but be careful.

That's luxury
leather workmanship.

[sniffing]

Ugh!

[squirting]

[straining]

[gulps]

[stomach rumbles, belches]

Hey, what's going on
down there?

Just tidying up
your tootsies, boss.

Remember, just a regular shine.

No funny stuff.



[whirring]

[clicking]

[bell dinging]

Hmpf! What's taking so long?

I'm almost done, sir!

[grumbles]
Well, quit lollygaggin'.

-[switch clicks]
-[whirring]

[whirring]

[bellows huffing]

[swishes]

[blows party pipe]

[sounds horn]

[squirts]

[whirring]

[grumbles] Oh!
Are you finished yet?

Almost. [wheezes]

All finished, my good sir!

Hmm, well,

I've had better.

That'll be 25 cents, please.

25 cents?
That's highway robbery!

Oh, dear! I must have left
my wallet in my other trousers.

Oh, well. I guess
the best things in life
are free. [laughs]

-[truck horn blaring]
-[Elmer screams]

Yeesh! I guess
that's what you get
for being sole-less!

[Road Runner beeps]

[machine whirring, beeping]

[dings]

[air hissing]

[Road Runner beeps]

[machine whirring, beeping]

[dings]

[air hissing]

[machinery whirring, clicking]

[Road Runner beeps]

[whistles]

[slurps]

[blows landing]

[Road Runner beeps]

[Road Runner beeps]

Oh, boy!
Gotta get ready for tonight.

Looking good,
if I don't say so myself.

But you did say so yourself.

I'm seeing a mo... M-m-mo...

A feature film.

I'm so excited,

I even made my own costume.

[clock chiming]

Hey, you're gonna be late!

What are ya still doing here?

Scram, Bub! Cuckoo! Cuckoo!

Uh-oh. B-B-Better get going!

[stuttering] Forgot my keys!

Forgot to lock the door.

[tires screeching]

It m-m-may be slow,

but it gets
g-g-great gas mileage!

[car backfires]

Almost there.

J-Just gotta
find a parking spot.

[tires screech]

What luck!

[police siren chirps]

I'm gonna have to write you up
a ticket, young man.

[gasps] Sorry, Officer,
won't happen again!

[grunts]

[grumbles]

There's gotta be a spot
around here somewhere.

A-ha!

[engine revving]

Almost there.

[tires screech]

[cool jazz music playing]

[Longboy] Hey,
thanks for the spot, man.

Pay it forward.

Bingo!

Finally, a spot.

[machinery whirring]

-[grumbles]
-[clock chimes]

Come on,
what are you waiting for?
Hurry up, ya doofus! Cuckoo!

Oh, what am I gonna do?

Looks like I have no choice.

[automated voice]
Press button for ticket.

[dings]

Press button
to take out a loan.

[dings]

[tires screeching]

-[tires screech]
-A-ha!

[sighs in relief]

Ooh! That guy always gets
the star treatment.

All right.

There's gotta be a spot
somewhere in this city.

Eureka!

Now's my chance.

[tires screeching]

[stuttering] Like I said,
I save a lot of money on gas.

[engine revving]

[laughing] I made it!

[sizzling]

[clock chiming]

I quit!
You're a lost cause, pal.

[laughing]

There they go again.

-[all screaming on TV]
-Help! Save us! Don't eat us!

There's always a parking spot
on my couch.

-And I've got the theater
all to myself.
-[police siren chirps]

[officer] Ahem!

Nice try, buddy.

[theme music playing]