Look (2010): Season 1, Episode 4 - Episode #1.4 - full transcript
Willie is upset to learn that no industry executives attended his concert, and Carl tries to ameliorate things by suggesting they produce a music video. Lenny and Stella's son's behavior at school precipitates a sit-down with his teacher. Meanwhile, Hannah and Molly secretly text each other in school about Molly's date with Shane. Also, Ron finally gets out of jail but has no place to go.
(static buzzes)
- [Narrator] Previously on Look:
- Right here, you hold the
rock and roll show right here.
- Yeah, I'm into it man,
let's fucking do it!
- Yeah!
- Have you see this
credit card bill?
Gucci, Valentinos?
Who do you think you are, Paris Hilton?
- I hate you!
- Where are you?
The kids are waiting outside!
- I'm getting my eyebrows done!
- They're gonna kick those
kids outta that place.
- Finally!
- Come on guys, get in!
- [Man Hidden By Car] Mrs.
Gerber, we really need to--
(car screeches)
- I've been at this station for 25 years.
I could be Dan the anchorman.
- Sorry Dan, no can do.
- He's breaking my fucking instruments!
- What the fuck is the matter with you?
- There isn't gonna be a concert,
the instruments are destroyed!
- You and Shane are
perfect for each other.
I'm gonna make it happen.
- Give it up for Willie
Ames, super fucking star!
- Willie, Willie, Willie,
Willie, Willie, Willie!
(police sirens)
♪ And I ♪
♪ I'm going downtown again ♪
♪ And I ♪
♪ I fall through these
clouds again and again ♪
(upbeat music)
♪ And I ♪
♪ I'm going downtown again ♪
♪ And I ♪
♪ I fall through these
clouds again and again ♪
♪ I could never tell the difference ♪
♪ When you fell or if you would ♪
(older in glasses chuckles)
- Kid, when I was young like you,
we had to look at people in the eye,
had to talk to people.
There was no computers,
wasn't no little doofickeys.
Everything's computerized today.
Everything is crazy.
So uh, you say there you
wanna learn about 21, huh?
- You reading my text?
- Yeah, I can see it!
Well, this is your lucky break, kid.
- All right, hang on.
- You remind me of my son.
You're probably just as bright.
He's got those text things,
that Google that stuff,
and the squeeters or squatters,
what do they call that?
Zippers? You know you...
- Twitters.
- Twitters!
That's it, twitters.
Crazy thing they do.
Anyways, this is your lucky night, kid.
(man in glasses laughs)
- You gotta remember the cards.
Most people can't remember the cards,
but I'm gonna teach you something.
- Okay.
- Oh, that's it.
I'm gonna tell you something.
- All right.
- [Man In Black] Just, as
somebody who wanna learn about 21.
- Okay.
- I'm gonna help you out
because you need help.
- Okay.
- You know what?
Now you watch and watch,
and watch my cards, you're looking at me,
you didn't concentrate.
I just slipped in an ace
of spades in your pocket.
Take a look.
- Oh shit.
- Yeah, and I'm not a mechanic.
What do you think a mechanic
could do to you in Vegas?
They'll eat you alive, eat you alive!
They love guys like you.
- Really?
- I said this is your lucky break.
I'm one of the world's best 21 players.
I'm gonna teach you the game.
Now, one of the things
about these casinos,
they got over 7,000 cameras,
800 of them right on the
ceiling alone, or more.
They have cameras in the bedroom.
(bed squeaking)
- Seriously?
- And there's cameras
in the bathroom, kid.
- What?
- Well, the people that
cheat, they wanna catch them
when they go to the
bathroom to cut the loot.
Hey, you got a girlfriend?
- No.
- Well if you do, don't bring her to Vegas
in summertime with no panties,
'cause there's cameras under each table.
They watch out for the
coyotes, or the cheaters.
- No way.
- Oh, yeah.
- Wow.
- You'll learn a lot, kid.
If you wanna learn, I'll teach you.
- All right.
(eerie, intense music)
(metal door creaking)
(upbeat guitar music)
♪ I kept paying mama's late fees ♪
♪ Till the mutt inside my lion went ape ♪
♪ I just can't come down ♪
♪ From my acid birthright ♪
♪ I hear Draco in the
airport and I start to cry ♪
♪ 'Cause she's in line ♪
♪ When I hear Draco in the
airport get played on the air ♪
♪ It takes my mind ♪
♪ To heaven, to heaven, to heaven ♪
♪ Right now ♪
♪ To heaven, to heaven ♪
♪ And all that it allows ♪
♪ Ooh, Laroo ♪
♪ We were watching Cocoon
in the motel room ♪
♪ In our stolen hotel bathrobes ♪
♪ Ooh Laroo ♪
♪ I was grooving with you with Zebanon ♪
♪ I said this is California ♪
♪ Ooh Laroo ♪
♪ We were watching Cocoon
in the motel room ♪
♪ In our stolen hotel bathrobes ♪
♪ Ooh Laroo ♪
♪ I was chancing with you with Zebanon ♪
♪ I said this is California ♪
♪ La la la la laroo ♪
♪ La la la la la la laroo ♪
♪ I said this is California ♪
(Upbeat guitar music)
(crowd cheering)
- Thank you for coming!
Good night!
(crowd cheering)
- She's leaving.
- Why is Hannah leaving so early?
(crowd cheering drowns out speaker)
- I'm gonna fall.
(crowd cheering)
[Voice In Crowd] Great show, man!
- Gone too soon.
- It was awesome, man.
- You sound great, man.
- Thank you man, thank you.
- Hey, you really do rock, though.
- Thank you, man.
Thank you, thank you.
All right, thank you.
- [Willie] Damn it.
- Whoa!
- Willie, it was a great show.
So the record people
didn't show up, big deal!
Look at all the new fans you just made.
- What, 15, 20 fucking people?
Who cares?
- 20?
No, there must have been
like, 50 people here?
Willie, come on, don't be such a sad sack.
You were so great tonight.
I mean, you already met
your half of the bargain
by writing and performing great songs.
I just need to work harder on my end.
- No, you did great baby,
that's why I'm so bummed out.
You got all these people to come.
Why couldn't those record guys
just come and hear this shit?
(Willie snorts)
- What?
- Do you want me to help you clean up?
- No, my assistant will help me.
(Carl burps)
- Okay, well I'm gonna go to bed.
- All right, I'll see you tomorrow.
- Bye, Carl.
- Always a pleasure.
You know where we blew it?
- [Willie] Where?
- We should've shot the whole thing
to cut into a music video for YouTube.
- What do you know about cyberspace?
You still only listen to vinyl.
- Better yet, there was a kid here
with a camera who shot the whole thing.
♪ And now I got a song ♪
♪ I sing it all day long ♪
- Amanda could contact
him through MySpace or
Twitter or whatever the hell.
- No man, why don't we just use
the surveillance camera footage?
We'll cut that into a music video.
- Finally, a cool idea.
What do we got?
One camera.
Two camera.
Three camera.
Four camera.
Five camera.
Six cameras.
Seven?
- We got eight,
if you count the ATM machine.
- Cool.
- [Willie] Come on, Carl, don't
fuck with that thing, man.
Cut it out, come on.
Come on, don't mess with it.
(upbeat music)
- Come on, let's clean this shit up, man.
- All right.
(car engines humming)
(children yelling)
- Don't get me wrong.
Balthasar is a great student.
So much potential.
But he has been acting
out quite a bit lately,
and he's becoming increasingly
disruptive in class,
and we'd like to nip it in the bud.
- What do you mean by acting out?
- He talks quite a bit in class.
He's also been bullying
several other smaller children.
- I don't want to get down!
- Don't get up!
- Bullying?
Aw, man, I don't like to hear that.
- Oh come on, kids bully
each other all the time.
He's got a little brother,
it just comes natural.
- It's becoming a problem.
And he's been acting rather defiant,
purposefully not following
instructions and so forth.
- We don't mean to pry, but is
everything okay in the home?
- What do you mean is
everything okay in the home?
- Sometimes we see these
behaviors emerge in class
when there's some sort of
event occurring at home,
like a divorce, for example.
- Divorce?
Not us, no.
- I'm just using that as an example.
- Well, everything's great at home.
Right honey?
- Right!
Everything's fine at home, knock on wood.
I mean, Balthasar is, he
seems perfectly happy.
He's the same little
Balthasar he's always been.
I think that he's just
forming his own independence.
He's pushing the limits of what he can
get away with in here, that's it.
- Well, we do stress independent thinking,
the Socratic philosophy of learning,
but maybe he's taking it a
little bit too far, though.
- Or, instead of blaming him, are you sure
that he's being intellectually
stimulated enough?
I mean, he's a very, very bright kid
and if he's not being challenged,
he could be very frustrated by that.
You know, with the amount
of tuition we're paying
I certainly hope that his
little developing brain
is being stimulated enough.
- Mrs. Gerber, as you're well aware,
the Longview Academy has one of the most
prestigious and innovative
elementary school curricula
in the country.
Balthasar's behavior is
becoming increasingly antisocial
and it is our responsibility
to bring that to your attention.
- You know what?
We understand, okay?
And we really appreciate
you taking the time
to involve us in your
process, so thank you.
And we will talk to Balthasar
and reiterate the importance
of behaving in class and
respecting your authority.
And as far as the bullying goes,
we'll talk to him about
that as well, okay?
- Thank you, Mr. Gerber.
Balthasar's well-being and development
are our paramount concern.
- Mm hmm.
- Thank you so much for coming in,
we really appreciate your time.
- Thank you.
- Really appreciate you taking the time.
- Thank you, goodbye.
- Nice to meet you.
- I know, she is a rich bitch.
- Balthasar's problem is that
that "C U Next Tuesday"
is his mom, the poor kid.
God.
- See you next Tuesday?
What does this mean?
- What a fag.
- What, are you trying to get
the kids kicked out of here?
You know the strings I had to pull
and the hoops I had to jump through
just to get them accepted?
- What a snippy little
smug $30,000 a year fag.
You know what, and I don't
really like the idea that
that fairy is the primary male influence
in both of our sons'
grade school education,
thank you.
- Oh come on.
Mr. Bennett is a great teacher.
And you know what?
He seems to really care.
And what makes you so sure that he's gay?
- Oh my god, I'm not even
gonna respond to that one.
And you didn't have to be
so condescending back there.
Do you know how much money we shell out
to this shit hole for both of the kids?
They should be kissing our asses.
- I know exactly how much
money we shell out every month
for this shit hole because I
write the checks, you remember?
- You know, I bet we could
get that little homo fired
if we just put our minds to it.
With what we pay, hello?
- Oh my god.
Stella, please, please, stop it.
Look, it wouldn't be the
worst thing in the world
to talk to Balthasar about
this bullying thing, okay?
- Oh, please.
- Bullying is unacceptable.
I was bullied.
And let me tell you, it
can scar you for life.
- You were bullied?
- Yes.
- Why am I not surprised?
(upbeat music)
- Now, you all say that you're not
that familiar with Shakespeare,
but what you may not know is
that we speak his words every day.
Who here has ever told a knock-knock joke?
Okay.
Then you've all spoken Shakespeare,
because "Knock knock, who's there?"
first appeared in Macbeth.
There are countless
phrases, and expressions,
and proverbs, and cliches
that were all originated by Shakespeare.
They're tiny, quotable verbages
that are called epigrams.
- [Recorded Woman's Voice]
For certain common STDs
on an annual basis--
- [Teacher] Such as, "All
that glitters is not gold".
That came from Merchant of Venice.
- [Recorded Woman's Voice] If
you're a sexually active kid,
it's vital that you get
the most common STD test,
a Pap smear--
- [Teacher] Be all and end
all, that comes from Macbeth.
Full circle, King Lear--
- [Classroom Video] A Pap smear tests
for pre-cancerous changes in the cervix
that stem from the commonest--
(relaxing music)
- I may be Jewish, but
I don't go to temple
or anything like that.
I mean I went to Hebrew
school when I was a kid,
but only because my dad
insisted I had a bat mitzvah.
So annoying.
- Yeah, gosh, remember in
like seventh or eighth grade,
there was like a bar or bat
mitzvah every other week.
- Oh my god, totally.
So funny.
All these rituals that come
with religion are so phony,
like bat or bar mitzvahs,
and quinceaneras, and confirmation.
It's like all for show.
Who has the bigger, better party.
It's not like there's
anything spiritual to it.
My bat mitzvah's theme was Harry Potter.
(laughs) Totally nerdy.
And not very Jewish.
- No, I was way into Harry Potter.
- (laughs) You have no idea.
I was the biggest Harry
Potter geek in the world.
(laughs) A total Potterhead, I swear.
I had to read every book
the day it came out.
I waited in line at midnight
with my mom, in costume.
(laughs) I was Hermione of course.
Such a geek.
- Come on, I have a hard time believing
you were ever a geek.
- You have no idea.
I had the body of a 12-year-old
until literally last year.
- No.
- (laughs) I wore headgear,
and I had glasses,
and my hair looked like a Brillo pad.
I mean we passed each other
many times in the hall,
but I don't blame you for not remembering.
I looked way different then.
- Out of my way, ugly.
Wait, I remember you now.
What are you talking about,
you looked cute back then too.
- You're lying.
You don't remember me.
That's okay.
Azkaban was my favorite
Potter book, which was yours?
- Oh, no, I didn't
actually read the books,
I just watched the movies.
Now Azkaban was definitely the best.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
It's pretty good.
- Mm hmm.
- [Shane] So um, if you and
Hannah are best friends and all,
what does she say about me?
- Don't worry, I already know everything.
So you guys like made out once, big deal.
It's not like she hasn't made out
with everyone else already too.
- We barely made out.
And she was drunk, I'm
surprised she even remembers.
- I love her to death,
but she's got some issues.
- Like what?
- I think she might be a sex addict.
- No, she's just a big slut.
There's a difference.
(Girl laughs and coughs)
- Excuse me.
- You choking on the fries?
- It was the milkshake.
- Oh. (laughs)
- (coughs) Oh my gosh, I don't know.
Her mom ran away when she
was like 10 years old.
That might have something to do with it.
But her dad's real cool.
Oh my god.
Did you see him get shot
by paintballs on the news?
- Oh, Jesus Christ!
- That was hilarious.
I felt kind of bad for him,
but you gotta admit that was pretty funny.
(Shane and Girl laugh)
- That was funny.
- You have a bit of a
reputation, you know.
- Look, it's not true.
I may have dated a bunch of girls,
but you're different.
You actually give me shit, I like that.
I like you.
- Even though that's total bullshit,
I still like hearing it.
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
(relaxing music)
- Since using partial
fraction decomposition,
we can write any rational function
as a sum of the factors of four.
One times one divided by eight x plus b.
We know where we're going with that.
Remember, this is all
gonna be on the test.
Where Q is not the zero polynomial
and P and Q have no common factor--
- [Female Teacher] There's good riddance,
love is blind...
Well, can you, Hannah?
- Can I what?
- Can you name just one of
Shakespeare's many epigrams
that we use in our everyday language?
- Eat me.
(class chuckles)
Out of house and home.
- Very good, Hannah.
That's Henry IV, Part Two.
(metal door creaks)
♪ Hey ♪
("Walls" by The Envy Corps)
♪ July fun cloud ♪
♪ You put it right next to me ♪
♪ And then you walk straight away ♪
♪ What does this mean ♪
♪ Am I to be scared ♪
♪ Are you looking back ♪
♪ To see if I've gone ♪
♪ Haven't you heard ♪
♪ I can walk through walls ♪
♪ And I ♪
♪ I should be screaming loud ♪
♪ But I'm holding it in ♪
♪ Until it I see you again ♪
♪ How long can you bleed ♪
♪ Until your heart runs dry ♪
♪ Are you looking back ♪
♪ To see if I've passed ♪
♪ Haven't you heard ♪
♪ I survived the blast ♪
(upbeat music)
- [Narrator] Previously on Look:
- Right here, you hold the
rock and roll show right here.
- Yeah, I'm into it man,
let's fucking do it!
- Yeah!
- Have you see this
credit card bill?
Gucci, Valentinos?
Who do you think you are, Paris Hilton?
- I hate you!
- Where are you?
The kids are waiting outside!
- I'm getting my eyebrows done!
- They're gonna kick those
kids outta that place.
- Finally!
- Come on guys, get in!
- [Man Hidden By Car] Mrs.
Gerber, we really need to--
(car screeches)
- I've been at this station for 25 years.
I could be Dan the anchorman.
- Sorry Dan, no can do.
- He's breaking my fucking instruments!
- What the fuck is the matter with you?
- There isn't gonna be a concert,
the instruments are destroyed!
- You and Shane are
perfect for each other.
I'm gonna make it happen.
- Give it up for Willie
Ames, super fucking star!
- Willie, Willie, Willie,
Willie, Willie, Willie!
(police sirens)
♪ And I ♪
♪ I'm going downtown again ♪
♪ And I ♪
♪ I fall through these
clouds again and again ♪
(upbeat music)
♪ And I ♪
♪ I'm going downtown again ♪
♪ And I ♪
♪ I fall through these
clouds again and again ♪
♪ I could never tell the difference ♪
♪ When you fell or if you would ♪
(older in glasses chuckles)
- Kid, when I was young like you,
we had to look at people in the eye,
had to talk to people.
There was no computers,
wasn't no little doofickeys.
Everything's computerized today.
Everything is crazy.
So uh, you say there you
wanna learn about 21, huh?
- You reading my text?
- Yeah, I can see it!
Well, this is your lucky break, kid.
- All right, hang on.
- You remind me of my son.
You're probably just as bright.
He's got those text things,
that Google that stuff,
and the squeeters or squatters,
what do they call that?
Zippers? You know you...
- Twitters.
- Twitters!
That's it, twitters.
Crazy thing they do.
Anyways, this is your lucky night, kid.
(man in glasses laughs)
- You gotta remember the cards.
Most people can't remember the cards,
but I'm gonna teach you something.
- Okay.
- Oh, that's it.
I'm gonna tell you something.
- All right.
- [Man In Black] Just, as
somebody who wanna learn about 21.
- Okay.
- I'm gonna help you out
because you need help.
- Okay.
- You know what?
Now you watch and watch,
and watch my cards, you're looking at me,
you didn't concentrate.
I just slipped in an ace
of spades in your pocket.
Take a look.
- Oh shit.
- Yeah, and I'm not a mechanic.
What do you think a mechanic
could do to you in Vegas?
They'll eat you alive, eat you alive!
They love guys like you.
- Really?
- I said this is your lucky break.
I'm one of the world's best 21 players.
I'm gonna teach you the game.
Now, one of the things
about these casinos,
they got over 7,000 cameras,
800 of them right on the
ceiling alone, or more.
They have cameras in the bedroom.
(bed squeaking)
- Seriously?
- And there's cameras
in the bathroom, kid.
- What?
- Well, the people that
cheat, they wanna catch them
when they go to the
bathroom to cut the loot.
Hey, you got a girlfriend?
- No.
- Well if you do, don't bring her to Vegas
in summertime with no panties,
'cause there's cameras under each table.
They watch out for the
coyotes, or the cheaters.
- No way.
- Oh, yeah.
- Wow.
- You'll learn a lot, kid.
If you wanna learn, I'll teach you.
- All right.
(eerie, intense music)
(metal door creaking)
(upbeat guitar music)
♪ I kept paying mama's late fees ♪
♪ Till the mutt inside my lion went ape ♪
♪ I just can't come down ♪
♪ From my acid birthright ♪
♪ I hear Draco in the
airport and I start to cry ♪
♪ 'Cause she's in line ♪
♪ When I hear Draco in the
airport get played on the air ♪
♪ It takes my mind ♪
♪ To heaven, to heaven, to heaven ♪
♪ Right now ♪
♪ To heaven, to heaven ♪
♪ And all that it allows ♪
♪ Ooh, Laroo ♪
♪ We were watching Cocoon
in the motel room ♪
♪ In our stolen hotel bathrobes ♪
♪ Ooh Laroo ♪
♪ I was grooving with you with Zebanon ♪
♪ I said this is California ♪
♪ Ooh Laroo ♪
♪ We were watching Cocoon
in the motel room ♪
♪ In our stolen hotel bathrobes ♪
♪ Ooh Laroo ♪
♪ I was chancing with you with Zebanon ♪
♪ I said this is California ♪
♪ La la la la laroo ♪
♪ La la la la la la laroo ♪
♪ I said this is California ♪
(Upbeat guitar music)
(crowd cheering)
- Thank you for coming!
Good night!
(crowd cheering)
- She's leaving.
- Why is Hannah leaving so early?
(crowd cheering drowns out speaker)
- I'm gonna fall.
(crowd cheering)
[Voice In Crowd] Great show, man!
- Gone too soon.
- It was awesome, man.
- You sound great, man.
- Thank you man, thank you.
- Hey, you really do rock, though.
- Thank you, man.
Thank you, thank you.
All right, thank you.
- [Willie] Damn it.
- Whoa!
- Willie, it was a great show.
So the record people
didn't show up, big deal!
Look at all the new fans you just made.
- What, 15, 20 fucking people?
Who cares?
- 20?
No, there must have been
like, 50 people here?
Willie, come on, don't be such a sad sack.
You were so great tonight.
I mean, you already met
your half of the bargain
by writing and performing great songs.
I just need to work harder on my end.
- No, you did great baby,
that's why I'm so bummed out.
You got all these people to come.
Why couldn't those record guys
just come and hear this shit?
(Willie snorts)
- What?
- Do you want me to help you clean up?
- No, my assistant will help me.
(Carl burps)
- Okay, well I'm gonna go to bed.
- All right, I'll see you tomorrow.
- Bye, Carl.
- Always a pleasure.
You know where we blew it?
- [Willie] Where?
- We should've shot the whole thing
to cut into a music video for YouTube.
- What do you know about cyberspace?
You still only listen to vinyl.
- Better yet, there was a kid here
with a camera who shot the whole thing.
♪ And now I got a song ♪
♪ I sing it all day long ♪
- Amanda could contact
him through MySpace or
Twitter or whatever the hell.
- No man, why don't we just use
the surveillance camera footage?
We'll cut that into a music video.
- Finally, a cool idea.
What do we got?
One camera.
Two camera.
Three camera.
Four camera.
Five camera.
Six cameras.
Seven?
- We got eight,
if you count the ATM machine.
- Cool.
- [Willie] Come on, Carl, don't
fuck with that thing, man.
Cut it out, come on.
Come on, don't mess with it.
(upbeat music)
- Come on, let's clean this shit up, man.
- All right.
(car engines humming)
(children yelling)
- Don't get me wrong.
Balthasar is a great student.
So much potential.
But he has been acting
out quite a bit lately,
and he's becoming increasingly
disruptive in class,
and we'd like to nip it in the bud.
- What do you mean by acting out?
- He talks quite a bit in class.
He's also been bullying
several other smaller children.
- I don't want to get down!
- Don't get up!
- Bullying?
Aw, man, I don't like to hear that.
- Oh come on, kids bully
each other all the time.
He's got a little brother,
it just comes natural.
- It's becoming a problem.
And he's been acting rather defiant,
purposefully not following
instructions and so forth.
- We don't mean to pry, but is
everything okay in the home?
- What do you mean is
everything okay in the home?
- Sometimes we see these
behaviors emerge in class
when there's some sort of
event occurring at home,
like a divorce, for example.
- Divorce?
Not us, no.
- I'm just using that as an example.
- Well, everything's great at home.
Right honey?
- Right!
Everything's fine at home, knock on wood.
I mean, Balthasar is, he
seems perfectly happy.
He's the same little
Balthasar he's always been.
I think that he's just
forming his own independence.
He's pushing the limits of what he can
get away with in here, that's it.
- Well, we do stress independent thinking,
the Socratic philosophy of learning,
but maybe he's taking it a
little bit too far, though.
- Or, instead of blaming him, are you sure
that he's being intellectually
stimulated enough?
I mean, he's a very, very bright kid
and if he's not being challenged,
he could be very frustrated by that.
You know, with the amount
of tuition we're paying
I certainly hope that his
little developing brain
is being stimulated enough.
- Mrs. Gerber, as you're well aware,
the Longview Academy has one of the most
prestigious and innovative
elementary school curricula
in the country.
Balthasar's behavior is
becoming increasingly antisocial
and it is our responsibility
to bring that to your attention.
- You know what?
We understand, okay?
And we really appreciate
you taking the time
to involve us in your
process, so thank you.
And we will talk to Balthasar
and reiterate the importance
of behaving in class and
respecting your authority.
And as far as the bullying goes,
we'll talk to him about
that as well, okay?
- Thank you, Mr. Gerber.
Balthasar's well-being and development
are our paramount concern.
- Mm hmm.
- Thank you so much for coming in,
we really appreciate your time.
- Thank you.
- Really appreciate you taking the time.
- Thank you, goodbye.
- Nice to meet you.
- I know, she is a rich bitch.
- Balthasar's problem is that
that "C U Next Tuesday"
is his mom, the poor kid.
God.
- See you next Tuesday?
What does this mean?
- What a fag.
- What, are you trying to get
the kids kicked out of here?
You know the strings I had to pull
and the hoops I had to jump through
just to get them accepted?
- What a snippy little
smug $30,000 a year fag.
You know what, and I don't
really like the idea that
that fairy is the primary male influence
in both of our sons'
grade school education,
thank you.
- Oh come on.
Mr. Bennett is a great teacher.
And you know what?
He seems to really care.
And what makes you so sure that he's gay?
- Oh my god, I'm not even
gonna respond to that one.
And you didn't have to be
so condescending back there.
Do you know how much money we shell out
to this shit hole for both of the kids?
They should be kissing our asses.
- I know exactly how much
money we shell out every month
for this shit hole because I
write the checks, you remember?
- You know, I bet we could
get that little homo fired
if we just put our minds to it.
With what we pay, hello?
- Oh my god.
Stella, please, please, stop it.
Look, it wouldn't be the
worst thing in the world
to talk to Balthasar about
this bullying thing, okay?
- Oh, please.
- Bullying is unacceptable.
I was bullied.
And let me tell you, it
can scar you for life.
- You were bullied?
- Yes.
- Why am I not surprised?
(upbeat music)
- Now, you all say that you're not
that familiar with Shakespeare,
but what you may not know is
that we speak his words every day.
Who here has ever told a knock-knock joke?
Okay.
Then you've all spoken Shakespeare,
because "Knock knock, who's there?"
first appeared in Macbeth.
There are countless
phrases, and expressions,
and proverbs, and cliches
that were all originated by Shakespeare.
They're tiny, quotable verbages
that are called epigrams.
- [Recorded Woman's Voice]
For certain common STDs
on an annual basis--
- [Teacher] Such as, "All
that glitters is not gold".
That came from Merchant of Venice.
- [Recorded Woman's Voice] If
you're a sexually active kid,
it's vital that you get
the most common STD test,
a Pap smear--
- [Teacher] Be all and end
all, that comes from Macbeth.
Full circle, King Lear--
- [Classroom Video] A Pap smear tests
for pre-cancerous changes in the cervix
that stem from the commonest--
(relaxing music)
- I may be Jewish, but
I don't go to temple
or anything like that.
I mean I went to Hebrew
school when I was a kid,
but only because my dad
insisted I had a bat mitzvah.
So annoying.
- Yeah, gosh, remember in
like seventh or eighth grade,
there was like a bar or bat
mitzvah every other week.
- Oh my god, totally.
So funny.
All these rituals that come
with religion are so phony,
like bat or bar mitzvahs,
and quinceaneras, and confirmation.
It's like all for show.
Who has the bigger, better party.
It's not like there's
anything spiritual to it.
My bat mitzvah's theme was Harry Potter.
(laughs) Totally nerdy.
And not very Jewish.
- No, I was way into Harry Potter.
- (laughs) You have no idea.
I was the biggest Harry
Potter geek in the world.
(laughs) A total Potterhead, I swear.
I had to read every book
the day it came out.
I waited in line at midnight
with my mom, in costume.
(laughs) I was Hermione of course.
Such a geek.
- Come on, I have a hard time believing
you were ever a geek.
- You have no idea.
I had the body of a 12-year-old
until literally last year.
- No.
- (laughs) I wore headgear,
and I had glasses,
and my hair looked like a Brillo pad.
I mean we passed each other
many times in the hall,
but I don't blame you for not remembering.
I looked way different then.
- Out of my way, ugly.
Wait, I remember you now.
What are you talking about,
you looked cute back then too.
- You're lying.
You don't remember me.
That's okay.
Azkaban was my favorite
Potter book, which was yours?
- Oh, no, I didn't
actually read the books,
I just watched the movies.
Now Azkaban was definitely the best.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
It's pretty good.
- Mm hmm.
- [Shane] So um, if you and
Hannah are best friends and all,
what does she say about me?
- Don't worry, I already know everything.
So you guys like made out once, big deal.
It's not like she hasn't made out
with everyone else already too.
- We barely made out.
And she was drunk, I'm
surprised she even remembers.
- I love her to death,
but she's got some issues.
- Like what?
- I think she might be a sex addict.
- No, she's just a big slut.
There's a difference.
(Girl laughs and coughs)
- Excuse me.
- You choking on the fries?
- It was the milkshake.
- Oh. (laughs)
- (coughs) Oh my gosh, I don't know.
Her mom ran away when she
was like 10 years old.
That might have something to do with it.
But her dad's real cool.
Oh my god.
Did you see him get shot
by paintballs on the news?
- Oh, Jesus Christ!
- That was hilarious.
I felt kind of bad for him,
but you gotta admit that was pretty funny.
(Shane and Girl laugh)
- That was funny.
- You have a bit of a
reputation, you know.
- Look, it's not true.
I may have dated a bunch of girls,
but you're different.
You actually give me shit, I like that.
I like you.
- Even though that's total bullshit,
I still like hearing it.
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
(relaxing music)
- Since using partial
fraction decomposition,
we can write any rational function
as a sum of the factors of four.
One times one divided by eight x plus b.
We know where we're going with that.
Remember, this is all
gonna be on the test.
Where Q is not the zero polynomial
and P and Q have no common factor--
- [Female Teacher] There's good riddance,
love is blind...
Well, can you, Hannah?
- Can I what?
- Can you name just one of
Shakespeare's many epigrams
that we use in our everyday language?
- Eat me.
(class chuckles)
Out of house and home.
- Very good, Hannah.
That's Henry IV, Part Two.
(metal door creaks)
♪ Hey ♪
("Walls" by The Envy Corps)
♪ July fun cloud ♪
♪ You put it right next to me ♪
♪ And then you walk straight away ♪
♪ What does this mean ♪
♪ Am I to be scared ♪
♪ Are you looking back ♪
♪ To see if I've gone ♪
♪ Haven't you heard ♪
♪ I can walk through walls ♪
♪ And I ♪
♪ I should be screaming loud ♪
♪ But I'm holding it in ♪
♪ Until it I see you again ♪
♪ How long can you bleed ♪
♪ Until your heart runs dry ♪
♪ Are you looking back ♪
♪ To see if I've passed ♪
♪ Haven't you heard ♪
♪ I survived the blast ♪
(upbeat music)