Leave It to Beaver (1957–1963): Season 1, Episode 13 - Voodoo Magic - full transcript

[Ward Narrating]
When you're the smallest boy in the group,
sometimes it can be pretty rugged.

[No Audible Dialogue]
And those older guys can really
make you feel left out of things.

But sometimes you manage
to turn the tables and get the better
of your tormentor.

And that's our story tonight
on Leave It To Beaver.

[Announcer]
Leave It To Beaver.

Starring Barbara Billingsley,
Hugh Beaumont Tony Dow...

and Jerry Mathers as the Beaver.

What are the boys doing today?
Wally and the Beaver are going
to the movies with Eddie Haskell.

I can't help it.
I just don't like that boy.

You have to admit,
he has good manners.
That's just it.

I don't mind he being polite,
but he's polite
in such a sneaky way.



Well, I don't think Eddie's a bad kid.
Good—bye, Mom.
We're going.

Yeah, Mom, we're going.
Hello, Eddie.

How do you do, Mr. Cleaver?

Gee, Mrs. Cleaver, you even
look pretty in an apron.

Thank you very much, Eddie.

Dad, could we each
have a dollar?
Yeah, I guess so.

Be sure and bring the change back.

What movie you boys going to?
Two good ones, Mrs. Cleaver.

Massacre at Blood River
and Voodoo Curse.

Massacre at Blood River
and Voodoo Curse?

Oh, I don't think so.

Isn't there something better
you boys can see?

I noticed in the paper
that Pinocchio is playing
at the Valencia.

Now you haven't seen that,
and that's a wonderful picture
for children.



Voodoo Curse is a wonderful
picture for children too.

Gee, Mom, everybody's
seen it but us.

We don't want to be
a bunch of creeps.

It was shot in Haiti, Mrs. Cleaver.
It's real educational.

Yes, I'm sure of that, Eddie.

Wally, I'm sorry,
but I want you to promise me...

that you won't take the Beaver
to see Voodoo Curse.

Well, all right, I promise.

— I'll see that he doesn't, Mrs. Cleaver.
— Yes, well, thank you, Eddie.

Hey, you guys,
don't forget my change.

[Wally]
Yeah, okay.

You know something?
What?

You're a real mean mother.

Oh, stop it.
No, seriously.

I don't see anything so wrong
with the boys seeing
Voodoo Curse.

Ward, you know how impressionable
the Beaver is.

Why, he went to see that jungle picture
and he got us up at 3:00
in the morning...

and said there was a lion
in his closet.

Yeah, but you got up to check,
and there wasn't any lion.

June, I saw hundreds of horror pictures
when I was a kid.

I read Dracula four times.
I even had my own subscription
to Weird Tales Magazine.

Well, I don't think children
as young as the Beaver...

should be exposed to pictures
that frighten them.

Now it may be all right,
but on the other hand,
it might leave permanent scars.

Well, come on.
Let's go get our tickets.

Wait a minute, Eddie.
We just walked over with you.

Me and the Beaver
are going to the Valencia.

You were there. I promised my mom
I wouldn't take Beaver
to Voodoo Curse.

Look, you promised
you wouldn't take the Beaver.

Did he promise he wouldn't take you?

No.
All right.

Then give him the money
and let him take you.

But the whole thing is,
Mom doesn't want Beaver
to see the picture.

How are you supposed to know that?

You're not supposed to be that smart.

They're grown up.
You're only a kid.

Gee, I don't know about this, Eddie.

Look, you got 'em on a technicality.

I do this to my mother all the time.

That's howl got my BB gun.

Now give Beaver the money
and let him take you.

Well, I guess it's okay that way.

Sure. Give him the money.

Hey, you think there's a poster
in front of the Valencia...

advertising Pinocchio?
Sure. Why?

Well, after we get out of here,
me and the Beaver are going over there
and look at the poster.

What do you want to do that for?

It'll help a little if they ask us
if we saw Pinocchio.

Boy, I hope I'm as smart
as you guys are when I grow up.

[Man In Movie]
And now, powers of darkness...

and black voodoo magic...

come to me—

and as this pin pierces
the image of my enemy...

let it pierce his body..

and bring to him the torture...

of slow death.

[Sinister Laugh]

Wally!
Cut it out, Eddie.

And now, my enemy,

you will feel pain.

You will sicken and die.
[Sinister Laugh]

Boys'll be home soon.
I better start dinner.

What's in the paper?

Same thing that's
in the paper every Saturday—
half the football scores.

They take you right up
to the third quarter...

then leave you hanging
until Sunday morning.

Well, why don't you write them
about starting the games earlier?

June, you can't—

Yeah, it's a good idea.

— Of course. It's a wonderful idea.
— [Phone Rings]

Any Saturday afternoon
you wouldn't be upset.

Hello?

Yes, this is Mrs. Cleaver.

Oh, hello, Eddie.
No, the boys aren't home yet.

Oh. Well, one of the kids
at school is an usher...

and he found Beaver's cap
in the movies,
and then he called me.

I knew you'd be anxious
about a nice cap like that.

Yes, well, thank you very much.
Where's the cap now?

It's in the manager's office
at the Globe Theatre.

Well, thank you, Eddie.
Good—bye.

Eddie Haskell?

Uh-huh.

Beaver left his cap
over at the Globe Theatre.

That's funny.

I thought Pinocchio
was at the Valencia.

Yeah. I thought Voodoo Curse
was at the Globe.

Well, Eddie probably
just got mixed up.

Yeah. The boys wouldn't
deliberately disobey us.

Well, I think we can trust them
that much, can't we?

Oh, sure we can.
[Chuckles]

What are you doing?
I'm looking up the Valencia.

[June]
Voodoo Curse. Globe Theatre.

Uh, boys.

You haven't told us
how you enjoyed the movie
this afternoon.

Oh, great, Dad.
Yeah, oh, great, Dad.

Let's see now, uh—
The name of that picture. Uh—

Oh, oh— Pinocchio, wasn't it?

Uh,yeah, Dad.
We saw the Pinocchio picture.

What was it about?

Uh, it was about—
[Chuckles]
Pinocchio.

Yeah, that was his name.

Well, uh, what happened?

Uh, well, he has adventures.

What kind of adventures?

You know, all kind.

Uh, suppose you tell us
about the picture, Beaver.

Well, there was a big man
sitting in front of me.

|didn't see very much.

Well, now, uh,you must have
seen some of the picture, fellows.

Tell me. How did you like the part
where Pinocchio was swallowed
by the whale?

|think| was out getting popcorn then.

You know, it's funny.
I saw that picture years ago,
and yet I remember it so vividly.

It's about a little boy
whose nose grew and grew
every time he told a lie.

Uh, boys, Eddie Haskell
phoned this evening,
just before supper.

He said you left your cap
at the movies, Beaver

Oh,yeah. I guess I did.
[Nervous Laugh]

You know, the thing that puzzled
your mother and me was...

how, if you boys were at the Valencia
seeing Pinocchio,

you could have lost your cap
at the Globe, Beaver.

Well, I—
How could I have done that, Wally?

Well, gee, Dad,
maybe they ran out of popcorn
at the Valencia,

and Beaver and I
went over to the Globe to—

— No?
— No.

Wally, I'm very disappointed in you.

Now didn't you promise me
that you wouldn't take the Beaver
to see Voodoo Curse?

I didn't break
my promise, Mom.
I didn't take the Beaver.

He took me.

Yeah. Wally give me the money
and I “tooken” him.

Wally, you're old enough
to know the difference
between right and wrong

Did you or did you not
break your promise to your mother?

Yeah, I guess I did.

Well, I think you boys
had better go on up
to your room now...

and stay there the rest of this evening
and all day tomorrow.

Yeah, I guess we'd better, Dad.

Mom, I'm awful sorry.

Eddie Haskell made us do it, Mom.

No, he didn't, Beaver.
We did it ourselves.

Well, I'm glad
you realize that.

I'm sorry, Mom.

I'm sorry too, Mom.

Well, I think
there's some hope for them.

I think so too.

You know, I never did
like that Eddie much.

Now I hate him worse than ever.

Yeah, he is kind of a miserable guy.

You know, I wouldn't like him at all,
if he wasn't my best friend.

Yeah. He's always pickin' on me.

But I fixed him real good this morning.

What do you mean,
you fixed him real good?

If I show you,you promise
you won't tell nobody?

Sure, I promise.

This isn't the kind of promise
you make Mom, is it?

No. Now what did you do
to him?

Hey, what's all this?

Don't you get it, Wally?

It's a voodoo curse,
just like in the picture.

I stuck the pin
in case the nail don't get him.

What are you laughing at, Wally?

I said the words
just like the witch doctor
before I gave him the works.

Are you kidding, Beaver?
How could you fall for such stuff?

There's no such thing
as a voodoo curse.

Maybe not, but I sure had
a lot of fun doing it though.

Oh, boys.
Morning, Mrs. Rayburn.

Good morning, Mrs. Rayburn.
Good morning, Theodore.

Wally, I want you to take a message
to your teacher.

Tell her that Eddie Haskell's
mother called,

and he'll be absent
for a day or two.

Is there something wrong
with Eddie?

Yeah, is there something
wrong with Eddie?

Well, apparently, he's ill.

Whatever it is came on him
quite suddenly over the weekend.

thank you, Wally.

Hey, aren't you in bed yet?

Wally, what if Eddie dies?
Will they give me the electric chair?

Sure. They got a little seat
they put on for kids...

just like they got in the barbershop.

Wally, stop teasing me.

I'm really worried about putting
the voodoo curse on Eddie.

You didn't put
any voodoo curse on him.

I told you before there's no such thing.

It's funny it didn't happen
until after I stuck the pin in him.

For the last time,
there's no such thing
as a voodoo curse.

And anyway, you'd have to be
a genuine witch doctor
to make it work.

Yeah, I guess you're right, Wally.

I sure hope you're right, Wally.

Eddie, please get well.

[Moaning]

Eddie, you don't have a temperature.

The doctor says you can
go back to school
tomorrow, Son.

Not the way I feel.
Let him go to school.

[Moans]

Well, I must get to the office.

Mm.

Feel better, Son.

Mom, I ache all over.

Look at my tongue.

Aah.

Doesn't look too good.

Dear, do you feel well enough
to see Beaver Cleaver,

or shall I tell him
to go away?

Yeah, I guess
I could see one of the guys.

You can come in now.

[Eddie Moaning]

[Moaning]

Hi, kid.

Hi, Eddie.
How do you feel?

Awful.

Uh, don't stay too long.

Did she go downstairs?

Yeah, she went downstairs.

What's the idea of the flowers?

Why didn't you bring me
something I could eat?

Gee, Eddie, all of a sudden
you don't look sick anymore.

Are you kiddin'?
I'm not sick.

just didn't feel like going to school.
I'm putting on the act.

No kiddin', Eddie?
You're not sick at all?
No place?

Of course not.

I do this all the time.

My mother always falls for it.

Don't you even have a pain
in your stomach?

Right here?
Nah.

How about up here?

I don't have a pain anywhere,
except a pain in the neck
since you came in.

Hey, how come all of a sudden
you're worried about me?

Well, when I heard you were sick,
I thought it was working.

What was working?
The voodoo curse I put on you.

You put a voodoo curse on me?

Yeah. I took a doll, I put a nail in it...

and then I put a pin in it,
just like in the picture.

You little dope.
What did you do that for?

'Cause I don't like you.

Nobody likes you, Eddie—
not even Wally,
and he's your best friend.

No foolin'?

Yeah, and you got us in trouble
about the movies.

[Laughs]
Voodoo curse.

You must be crazy to think
a thing like that would work.

Hey, where did you stick the pins?

I stuck the pin right here
and the nail right there.

What a crazy thing to do.

I'm glad it's not workin'.

|don't like you very much,
but I'd feel kind of bad if you died.

Why don't you get out of here?

Okay.

So long, Eddie.

Ma, come quick!
I'm sick! I'm sick!

[Groans]

[Doorbell Rings]

Oh, hello, George.
Come on in.

Evening, Ward.
[June]
Who is it, dear?

Oh, it's, uh, George Haskell.

Well, uh, won't you
sit down, George?

No, thank you.

I'm going to be very brief
and to the point.

It's about my Eddie
and your boy, uh—

Uh, I believe the kids
call him “Gopher.“

Beaver.
Uh, Beaver, yes.

What's he done?

Uh, Ward, uh—

You know me fairly well.

You've known me as a levelheaded,
conservative fella, right?

Right.
Right.

Ward, your Beaver
has put a voodoo curse
on my Eddie.

Well, have you called in
a good witch doctor yet?

Ward, I'm just giving you the facts.

One, Eddie's in great pain
in his stomach and his chest.

Two, the doctor says that there's
nothing wrong with him
that he can see.

Three, your Beaver has made
a black magic doll
and stuck pins in it.

Well, it must be
some kind of a joke, George.

It's no joke to me
or to Eddie's mother.

It's, uh—
Well, we'd better do something
about that, huh?

Excuse me, George.

I thought maybe you and George
would like a cup of coffee.

Where you going?
I'm gonna see if Beaver
put a voodoo curse on Eddie.

Oh.

Well—

George, would you like
a cup of coffee?

Well—

I believe not.

Oh, hi, Dad.
Hi, Dad.

Hi Beaver, uh—

Mr. Haskell is downstairs,
and he's pretty upset.

Did you get a doll of Eddie
and stick pins in it?

Uh—huh. I got it right here, Dad.

Good gosh, Beaver.

Beaver, did you ever do
anything like this before?

No, this is my first time.
I guess that's why it didn't work.

[Wally]
I told him it was silly, Dad

Is there something wrong with Eddie?
He was all right this afternoon.

Yes, it seems he has pains
in his chest and stomach.

How could he be sick, Dad?

I took the pin and the nail out
and “un—cursed” him.

Uh, well, we'll talk about that later.

Right now I think I'd better
get back downstairs...

and see what I can do
about calming Mr. Haskell down.

George, I just can't believe this.

The Beaver's such
a sweet little fellow.

Why, he likes everybody—
even Eddie.

I mean, he likes everybody.

Well?

I was just telling George here
that the Beaver wouldn't think
Of doing anything like this.

Yes, well, it seems he did
stick some pins in a doll.

[Chuckles]
Then it's true.

What are you gonna do
about this, Ward?
Wait a minute, George.

Let's be sensible about this.
We're both adults.

We know there's no such thing
as black magic.

I don't know about these things,

but the fact remains that Eddie
has pains in his stomach
and in his chest.

But then they must be
psychological pains, George.

Look. You see, Eddie believed
it would work, so it worked.

That's the whole secret
of the witch doctors' power.

You seem to know
a great deal about this subject.

Yeah, I've read a little
about it.
I'm sure you have.

Your son must have
picked it up somewhere,
and it's not in the school curriculum.

George, the whole thing
came from a picture
the boys saw.

Look, George, let's keep
our feet on the ground.

These pains of Eddie's
are in his mind.
No, they're not.

They're in his stomach and in his chest,
and I expect you to do
something about it.

Well—
And don't ask me what.

Good night.

Good night,June.

Yes, George, and say hello
to Agnes for me.

Yeah.

Well, you may have
something there, Agnes.

Well, I'm so glad to hear
that Eddie's back on his feet.

Thanks for calling.

Good—bye. Hi.

Hello, dear.
That was Agnes Haskell.

Eddie's feeling fine again.
Oh, yeah, I thought he would be.

How long before dinner?

About 10 minutes.

How were you so sure
that Eddie was going to be all right?

Well, I told you
I'd take care of it,
and I did.

I had a little talk
with Beaver last night.

Well, what did the Beaver
say to Eddie that cured him?

Well,June, I told you
I'd read a little on the subject,

so I sent the Beaver over
with a genuine voodoo curse remover.

Oh, Ward.

A voodoo curse remover?
Well, sure.

You can find the ingredients
for that in any good
black magic cookbook.

What's in it?

Well, you take three worms
from the backyard,

four hairs from a dog's tail,

six toadstools picked
in the light of the moon,

two hairs from a small boy's head—

Uh, that hurt the Beaver a little bit,
but I figured he had it coming to him.

Then you put all of the ingredients
in a Bull Durham sack,

and you pass it six times
over the victim's body.

And I told the Beaver that he could
recite any magic words
that came to mind.

Oh, Ward.

It's wonderful having a practicing
witch doctor in the family
when you need him.

Hey,June, you know
that drive in the country
I was talking about last Saturday?

What do you say
we try it again today?

Eddie Haskell's upstairs.
Boys are going
to the movies again.

Eddie Haskell.

You think I oughta drop
a few gentle hints to the boys...

that maybe Eddie Haskell
is not the ideal American youth?

Oh, honey, that's
the worst thing you can do.

Let them find out for themselves.
They will, soon enough.

Hey, fellas, let's go to the Globe
again this week.

They got a couple great pictures—

Monsters fl'om Outer Space,
and The Thing That Creeps.

Look, Eddie, we told you before.

Mom doesn't want me taking Beaver
to those kind of pictures.

What's the matter with you guys?

You wouldn't ever catch me
listening to my parents.
I never do.

Yeah, Eddie.
Well, maybe that's why
you're such a miserable creep.

Yeah. Maybe that's why
you're such a miserable creep.

I don't care where you're going,
but me and the Beaver
are going to the Valencia.

Come on, Beave.

Bye, Mom. Bye, Dad.

Bye, Mom. Bye, Dad.
Where you boys going?

The Valencia.
[Beaver]
Tosee Pinocchio.

Good—bye, Mrs. Cleaver.
Good—bye, Mr. Cleaver.
Good—bye, Eddie.

Eddie, aren't you going
to the movies with the boys?

Well, I wasn't,
but I guess I will
go to the Valencia.

I think that's what
my parents would like.

Well, looks like there might be
some hope for Eddie too, huh?