Las Vegas (2003–2008): Season 4, Episode 12 - The Chicken Is Making My Back Hurt - full transcript
When the Gambling Commission receives what it considers too many complaints on Ed, the board forces him to attend Anger Management. Mike considers asking for a loan from Ed in order to buy his new condo. Danny searches for an employee who is in so much need of money that he's willing to gamble with his life. Dalinda feels the need to do something with her life, and Sam gets jealous when one of her high profile big spenders comes to town and wants to take Mary to dinner instead of her.
RADIO ANNOUNCER: Good morning,
Las Vegas. It's another beautiful day.
For those of you driving near the Strip,
be careful.
There's a bull on the loose.
That's right. I said a bull.
God, I love this town.
Hey, Mike.
Hey.
You ever have
one of those days?
Yeah, I'm having one now.
Not that kind of day,
the other kind.
You know, where you wake up happy and
the light just seems to dance differently
and the birds are chirping
and your heart is open.
No. I don't have those days.
But you can, you know?
I finally realized
that it's just about attitude.
You can choose exactly
how you want to feel.
Ah.
Like, look at this guy.
He's made a choice to be happy.
I don't think that's happy.
I'll be right back.
Delinda.
Hey. How are you doing?
Beautiful day, isn't it?
Like how you dance.
That's right. Keep it moving.
Hey, what are you doing
to my husband?
Oh, I'm just following
his lead.
He's not dancing.
He's had a stroke.
And I'm sure if he could talk, he would
tell you that he doesn't appreciate
you making fun of him.
But l...
Save it.
Yo, that was
cold-blooded, D.
But I didn't mean...
Save it.
How's your day going now? Hmm?
Mm...
Those birds still chirping?
Danny!
Hey. Hey.
Your boy, Jim, who you got
the valet job for is looking for you.
Hey, did you hear about the
rodeo bull running down the street?
Is this a joke?
No, I heard about it on the radio.
I guess some truck with a bunch
of bulls from the Vegas rodeo crashed.
One of them got away and I guess
they lost him somewhere behind the Wynn.
How do you lose
a 2,000-pound bull?
Bulls are surprisingly crafty. And
if I were you, I would change that tie.
Don't wear anything red.
They hate red.
No red, cool. So, uh, listen, I
was hoping I could borrow some scratch.
Yeah, man. What do you need?
Uh, I got...
Ten grand.
What do you need
ten grand for?
Remember the condo
I put a bid on?
No.
Well, I put a bid on a condo and now
the seller's asking for another ten G's.
He says I got to have it by today
or he's going to go with another offer.
I got to have this place, man.
I wish
that I could help you...
But you can't.
Why don't you ask
Ed for an advance?
He can be quite generous
when he's not being insane.
If you do, do not let him guilt you into
doing anything for him around the house.
This is very important.
What are you talking about?
Well, l... I asked to borrow
a couple grand to fix up my car.
The next thing you know I'm hanging
drywall for him in his guesthouse.
I didn't know
he had a guesthouse.
You see what I mean?
Good luck. And remember, no red.
Dude, I just saw a bull
running through the parking lot.
MAN 1: No way!
You serious?
MAN 2: I'm so hammered.
(CELL PHONE RlNGlNG)
Yeah?
What? Where?
I'm on my way.
DANNY: Jimmy?
You looking for me?
Danny, hey.
Hey. How's the new job?
Good. Real good.
The tips
are really something here.
You know, you just keep
grinding it out
and you'll be
out of your hole in no time.
Yeah. About that.
I mean, this is real hard
for me to ask.
Jimmy, it's me.
Just tell me what you need.
Money.
Well, that seems like
a common theme today.
I've got, uh, a couple hundred.
No, I need more than that.
A lot more.
You know what, I'm sorry.
Forget I even asked.
I can... I can probably
come up with a couple grand.
No, no, no.
Don't worry about it, okay?
Okay. Are you sure?
It's all good.
Okay.
Let me get back to work.
(CELL PHONE RlNGlNG)
Yeah, Mike.
In where?
Sanitation just found him.
All right. Call Metro.
Victim had what looked to
be a.38-caliber bullet in his head.
And the card of a Montecito
employee in his pocket.
Well, that's Jimmy Willis's card.
He's a valet here.
Yeah. I'm going to need
to talk to him.
Hey, it's Jimmy.
Listen, I need more time
to come up with the money.
No, please.
Just one more week... Please.
MlKE: Still no lD
on the body.
Metro is wrapping it up. They
should be out of here in about an hour.
Do whatever you can to help,
but keep it quiet.
By the way,
what happened to your tie?
Oh, see, uh, a bull got loose
from the rodeo...
and Danny said not to wear anything
red because it drives them crazy.
And they're crafty. So, I took off
my tie because it was red.
Never mind.
Uh, listen, Ed, I need to ask you something
and you know I wouldn't ask you unless...
How much?
What?
What? How much?
Um...
Ten thousand.
See, I'm buying
a condo and...
Fine.
Ed, thank you.
I will pay you back
as soon as I can.
I know that.
So, listen, Mike, I've been
thinking of building one of them
brick barbeques for the house.
Something nice out there by the pool.
Yeah.
What do you say you come over
Saturday and give me a little hand, huh?
Saturday?
Yeah.
Saturday, I'd love to
but I'm moving my stuff into
the new place. So, maybe if we, um...
What's up?
Ran out of ink or something.
Did you say Saturday?
Yeah.
Because Saturday, you know, Saturday
is good for me. Saturday is wide open.
Uh, how about 10:00 a.m.?
How about 7:00?
Even better.
Look at that.
It's writing again. Wow.
Do me a favor and, um...
don't cash this in here. I
don't want people to think I'm a softy.
You got it.
I guess we'll see you,
uh, 6:30, Saturday morning.
All that stuff will be out back there.
Try to keep the noise down.
Please put on a tie, will you?
You got it, Ed. Thank you!
All right.
(CELL PHONE RlNGlNG)
Yeah?
What do you mean, two guys
from State Gaming are here?
To see me?
They were here
three weeks ago.
This is starting
to piss me off, okay?
Hey, I wonder what
he's like in person.
I mean, I know what he's like. Or
at least, I think I know what he's like,
but I wonder
what he's really, really like.
They say he smells really good
all the time and...
Hey...
He has a huge...
Hi.
Hi.
Who are you talking about?
Uh... Keith Mannix.
Who's Keith Mannix?
Who's Keith Mannix?
Mmm-hmm.
Who is Keith Mannix?
That's what I just said.
Who's Keith Mannix?
Uh, three-time MVP,
seven-time all star,
number three on
People's most eligible list
drop-dead gorgeous
Keith Mannix.
So, pro basketball player,
Keith Mannix? Yes.
He's staying here with us,
in our hotel.
Yeah, how come
he's not on my VlP list?
All I have is some guy named
Moses Guthrie. And I don't know...
That's him.
Moses Guthrie is Keith Mannix? Yes.
Moses Guthrie was Doctor
J's character's name in the movie.
The Fish That
Saved Pittsburgh.
He always travels
under that name.
Why do you know that?
I read Jet.
Of course you do.
Last time I hosted a basketball player,
all he did was hit on me the whole time.
Well, Keith is not like that. His player
bio describes him as very sensitive.
Oh, really?
Yes.
Let me explain something
to you, Mary.
All pro basketball players are the same.
Egotistical, womanizing attention whores.
I don't plan on giving him any different
treatment than I would any other VlP.
Excuse me, Sam?
Yeah.
Mr. Guthrie?
Please, call me Keith.
I use Guthrie
to fly under the radar.
Well, hi, Keith.
Welcome to the Montecito.
We have a lovely suite
available for you,
so if you will follow me,
I will take you right to it.
I want to sign your balls.
No... I... Want you
to sign my balls?
If you could sign my balls...
Will you please sign
my ball for me?
Okay.
Please? Thank you.
Okay.
There you go.
Thank you.
Okay. Right this way.
Thanks.
Okay.
Thank you.
Hey, Sharon.
Hey.
Did you have
any complaints today?
No.
Oh, thank God.
As a matter of fact, it's been
a good day around here.
We settled a possible
discrimination suit.
What was it about?
It was a reaction by a worker
to a customer telling an awful joke.
He wanted to sue us claiming
a hostile work environment.
What was the joke?
(TELEPHONE RlNGlNG)
You'll excuse me.
Human Resources,
this is Sharon.
Actually, he just walked in
to sign the settlement.
"A black eye, a fat lip
and a job."
What? That's it, man. I'm not signing
any damn settlement. You know what?
Now I am suing your ass.
What? Me? No, no, no, no, no.
I was just reading.
My lawyers will be in touch.
No, no, no, no, no. I'm sorry.
I'm really not like this.
I'll write him a note.
That's two.
Two visits in one month.
Why is the Gaming Commission
busting my balls?
Well, sir,
a number of complaints
involving the Montecito
have come to our attention.
And because we regulate the
Montecito's gaming license,
the inquiries fall
into our jurisdiction.
May we?
No.
What...
What kind of complaints
are we talking about here?
Some of the grievances cited
unprofessional conduct in the Montecito,
while others ranged from verbal intimidation
to actual physical confrontation.
Just give me the names
of these employees cited
and I will investigate
each matter internally.
All the complaints filed are
against you personally, Mr. Deline.
Me?
Let me see the complaints.
I'm sorry, but we can't.
To avoid retaliation,
we do not disclose the
complaining party's information.
Smart.
Yeah. So, where does
that leave me?
Am I supposed to get a lawyer
or something like that?
Only if you want to dispute
these charges in front of the board.
Keep in mind, though, that if you're
found guilty of even a single charge,
you will be forced to forfeit
the Montecito's gaming license.
That would be, uh, not good.
What's behind
door number two?
You agree to treatment by one of the
board-certified specialists in this area.
What kind of specialist
are we talking about?
Anger management? You want
me to go to an anger management class?
What are you, out of your mind?
I'll go.
I'll make an appointment.
Today. And remember, if this
doesn't go well...
The Montecito will lose its
gambling license. Have a nice day.
So, I reserved the cabana
for you at the pool.
And if there's anything else
that you might need during your stay,
please don't hesitate to ask.
Well, there is one more thing
you can do for me.
You see, I hate dining alone
and I would really enjoy the company
of a beautiful woman
at dinner tonight.
Well, that's
such a nice offer, but...
I would love to
ask your friend.
My friend?
Yeah, the girl downstairs
holding the basketball.
Downstairs... Oh, Mary?
Mary. Okay. Yeah. Yeah.
I would love to ask Mary.
Oh, her? Really?
Okay. Well, you should do...
You should go for it.
So...
Welcome to the Montecito.
Hi. Are you new
to the program?
Am I what?
Are you new to the program?
Oh, uh, yeah.
Well, come on in.
We're about to get started.
How you doing?
PAUL: It looks like we have somebody
new today. What's your name, friend?
I'm Ed.
Hi, Ed.
ED: How you doing, guys?
Welcome, Ed.
Why don't you share a little
something about yourself with the group?
Like what?
Like when did you first realize
that you might have a problem?
Well, I mean,
I really wouldn't call it a problem.
That's denial, Eddie.
Denial, man. Let it out, brother.
Let go of your pain.
I haven't got any pain.
And it's never Eddie,
douche bag.
Ed, you have friends here.
It's okay to let go.
Now close your eyes.
Get the hell out of here.
Please, close your eyes.
No, you please.
Ed. Please.
Okay.
Now relax.
Take yourself back
to that first time.
What was happening around you that
made you want to publicly masturbate?
What did you just say to me?
What made you want
to masturbate in public?
I don't do that, you creep.
What are you running here,
a freak show?
This is a workshop.
What, a workshop
for jag offs?
For chronic
and public masturbators.
Jeez! You're a bunch
of sick animals.
Bastards, why don't you
cut your hands off or something.
Take a pill,
you sick bastards.
(SlGHS)
Bob, close your eyes.
Gladly.
Mr. Deline, you're late.
Yeah, I'm, uh...
I'm really sorry about that.
I accidentally walked
into this disgusting...
Well, never mind.
I'm Dr. Sassen.
How are you?
You shake like a girl.
What?
Your handshake
is like a little girl's.
Here's an idea for you.
How about I crack you right
in the mouth and that way you...
It was a test.
You had me there good.
I just wanted to get a sense
of what I'm dealing with here.
Yeah, so, what do we do now?
We have some work to do.
Please.
JlMMY: I told the police what I knew.
I met the guy at a VA support group.
The cops are looking at you
as their only lead.
I didn't have anything to do
with that guy's death.
Can you prove that?
Why do I have to?
Jimmy, they found your card.
There was something.
At our support meeting, Jack,
that's the dead guy's name...
Jack says he met some guy
at the blood bank
who passes out little black business
cards with a phone number on them.
Tell me about the card.
Gets you into a big stakes
Russian roulette game.
They'll pay you 20 grand to pull
the trigger with one bullet in the gun.
Forty grand with two bullets.
Like that.
So, you're telling me this guy
played Russian roulette?
Yeah. And lost.
Jimmy, please tell me you're not thinking
about doing something like this.
No. My folks sent me some money.
It's all taken care of.
So, can I go now?
Yeah. Yeah.
I'll talk to you later.
You still looking for players?
Okay, Ed,
how would you react
if a man stood
right in front of you
and said he was going to
knock your teeth
down your throat?
Well, Doc, see the first
thing you do is you kind of take
a half step to the right so you can't
get hit with a straight right hand.
Then I take my thumb and
I go right for this eyeball...
No.
What do you mean? No?
No.
Though these are antagonistic words,
you have to defuse the situation.
And go to that place of peace
that's within you.
Oh, l, uh... I don't...
I don't think so, Doc.
We know it is not an easy
place to get to and that is why
we've developed
a very effective tool.
This is your anger pillow.
My... My anger pillow?
I want you to keep it with you
at all times
and at the first sign of feeling angry,
I want you to squeeze it.
Squeeze the angry pillow?
Squeeze it and transport
yourself to that peaceful place.
Give it a try.
How about I just smother you
to death with it?
How about I call Agent Watman?
I'll take the pillow.
Now, remember, keep it with you
at all times.
And you squeeze it whenever you feel
anger coming on. That's the first step.
Good, good.
Now, within 24 hours,
you're going to feel like a new man.
What's this
24-hour bit?
Oh, well, for the next day, you're going
to be observed in your work environment.
And based on our findings,
we'll either recommend or not
to suspend your license
with the commission.
You're going to follow me
around for 24 hours?
No, no, no, no. We're just going
to check up on you from time to time,
make sure you're following
the program. That's all.
Remember, Ed,
find your happy place.
And squeeze the pillow.
Thanks, Doc.
Hey, man. Hey, that's my car!
Hey, stop, you son of a bitch! Hey!
Hey, Doc.
Listen, I need a ride...
Oh, my God, you will never
believe what just happened to me.
Keith asked you to dinner.
Keith asked me to dinner.
Wow. What a surprise.
Have fun.
Okay. What do you think
I should wear?
I was thinking that little black
number with super high heels so he
doesn't have to bend down
too far to kiss me.
I'm not real interested
in your date with Keith.
Oh, okay. I just... I thought
you would be happy for me.
No, I think that you shouldn't
get too caught up with him because
he's a basketball player
and he has women all over the world.
You're jealous.
What?
Jealous.
Not.
You're mad because
he likes me and not you.
Listen to me carefully. I could
care less about a man like Keith Mannix.
I'm sorry you feel that way, but it's
not my fault that he thinks that I'm
sexy and not you.
What? Are you high?
Ninety-eight hundred,
ninety-nine hundred, ten thousand.
Thank you.
This is a robbery!
Do as we say or you're dead.
Right now! You, you, move!
Everybody out of this room now!
Move it! Move it! Move it!
Hey, you down! Get down on
your knees! Now! This is no joke!
Nobody moves.
Everybody lives.
Come on. Come on.
Quicker. Give him the money.
Put the money in the bag.
It's going to be okay.
Wallets, watches,
cell phones.
Take it off.
Give me your wallet.
Don't even think about it.
What do we got here?
Open it up.
Slowly.
Holding out on me?
(ALARM RlNGlNG)
Let's go! Let's go!
Damn it!
Watch it, old man.
What?
I said watch it, old man!
Next time I'm going to shatter
your old hip all over this casino.
Shatter. Um...
Listen, you have yourself
a nice day and I'm sorry.
Daddy?
Yeah.
Why are you carrying a pillow?
Because I'm angry.
Oh, shouldn't it be
because you're tired?
Honey, I hear you're telling
dirty jokes.
Not dirty jokes, racist jokes.
Yeah. Don't do that.
I need you
to do me a big favor.
I need to close down that
blackjack table over there.
So I need all the people to
move to another table over there
and why don't we just set up
this whole section?
Well, it's just that...
Thanks, sweetie. That's really great.
And, uh, just please behave yourself.
Hi, folks, I'm sorry but we need to
close down this section of the casino.
We have another table waiting
for you just right over there.
So, if you'll just
make your way.
Again sir, I'm sorry for the inconvenience,
but I do need to close this table down.
Just one minute.
Okay.
Please, sir, we have another
table just right over there.
I know. Just a minute.
I'd be happy to offer you a
free dinner tonight if you'd kindly move
to the next table.
Like I said,
I'm going to need a minute.
Okay, pal, enough is enough.
Just tell me. What's it going to take
to get you to that table over there?
My wheelchair.
Oh, oh, I'm so sorry.
If I could reach you,
I'd punch you in the mouth.
I hate this town.
Well, see the thing is,
I want the condo, but I just got robbed.
This happens all the time.
Don't worry.
And now I got to get up at
6:30 in the morning, that's right,
6:30 in the morning and build
a damn barbeque.
I hate this town!
They really do hate red.
Help me.
(TlRES SQUEALlNG)
Danny, you got to do
something about the valet.
It's so backed up, I can't
get the limos in for my big players.
Well, why is it backed up?
I don't know. Rick said some
guy called in sick and your buddy,
Timmy... Jimmy. Yeah. Jimmy quit. Jimmy.
What? Why?
I don't know. Who cares? But it's affecting
business so go take care of it.
Hey, I'm sexy, right?
Right.
Right.
Damn it, Jimmy.
You don't have a son
by that name?
Okay. Thank you.
Sorry to bother you.
Hello, Mr. Willis, do you have
a son James? United States Marine Corps?
You do? Good.
Uh, my name is Danny McCoy.
I was in the same platoon
as your son.
Well, l, uh... I think that
Jimmy may be in a little trouble.
Okay.
Okay, well, he said
that you sent him some money.
You didn't?
Okay.
Okay. Well, if you hear from him, please
tell him to call me as soon as you can.
Danny McCoy.
All right. Thank you, sir.
Carl, I need to put some
money in the safe.
Oh, okay, Mike.
I just wanted mine.
What?
Um, forget the safe.
I need a room.
Um, sure thing, Mike.
How long are you going to
be needing the room?
Hey, Pam, it's Mike.
Yes, I still want the condo
and I have the money.
Bingo.
Lost, white boy?
Looking for Wallace.
Don't know no Wallace.
I heard he rolls down here.
"Rolls"?
Check out the white boy.
You five-O?
No.
If you're not five-O,
why are you packing then?
Just tell Wallace Danny
McCoy wants to speak to him.
You better pray
Wallace heard of your ass.
How about this weather, huh?
It's crazy.
Danny McCoy.
I've heard of you,
but I don't know you.
Why you calling on me?
I need information.
What do I get out of it?
Nothing.
Except I could owe you.
Wallace is listening.
An underground Russian roulette game,
time and place?
Now, why you want to go
and get involved in all that?
Time and place.
Now you owe Wallace.
MlKE: Ed, I just want to
say thanks again. I got the condo.
Hey, please. Any time.
That's a nice pillow.
Thanks a lot.
You heard about this bank
robbery that went down this morning?
Yeah. Yeah.
I heard something about it.
Well, you know, see, people
hear this kind of stuff on the news
and they get
these weird ideas.
That's why I want a couple of
extra security guys on the casino floor,
you know, for a couple days.
You got it. You got it.
Hey, what about that bull?
What happened with the bull?
The bull...
The police... Two jag offs... Apparently
when they were running away from cops,
they smashed into that bull.
One of the guys they found dead and the
other guy got away with the money. So.
What's the matter?
Nothing. Uh, let me work on
getting that extra security in here.
Oh, Mike, let's make it
6:00 on Saturday.
I figure this way you can,
you know, finish up by sun down.
And then we can all relax, sit
down and barbeque a few steaks together.
It will be nice, no?
Yeah.
Nice.
Yeah.
Excuse me, Mr. Deline.
Yeah. What can I do for you?
Oh, hey, nice pillow.
Yeah. Thanks a lot.
Um, that gentleman at the bar
has had way too much to drink.
And we've cut him off,
but he's refusing to leave.
Okay. I'll take care of it.
Thank you.
Excuse me, sir, I'm afraid we're going
to have to ask you to leave the hotel.
I will leave when I'm ready to leave.
All right? Not a second before that.
Listen, uh, sir, either you
leave the hotel
or I'm going to have to
call the police.
And they'll remove you.
You don't want that, now,
do you?
Okay. Okay. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Great.
Can I just get a glass of water,
please, before I leave?
Absolutely.
Some water, please.
Thank you.
Hey, you want to hear a joke?
Um, no.
Okay, what's the difference
between you and me?
What is it?
I'm dry.
I'm dry.
Come on!
Thank you.
I need to be punished.
I need dirty sex.
I need dirty freaky sex.
After he hangs up,
I like dirty, freaky, nasty sex.
Well, I'm glad you're coming.
Yeah, well,
I miss your body, too.
I can't wait to see you.
I love you, too.
Bye.
Oh, hey, listen,
I need to talk to you.
I don't want to keep...
No, you're not going
out with Keith.
Want to bet?
Listen to me.
He has a girl coming to his hotel room.
I just heard him on the phone.
He said, "l love you" to her.
You are unbelievable.
There's no end to how far you'll go.
He likes me. Not you.
So do yourself a favor,
get over it.
Mary, Mary, Mary.
How you doing?
Good.
You look great.
Thank you.
(CELL PHONE DlALlNG)
Police officers!
Let me see your hands!
Move!
Police officers! Put the gun down!
Wait, wait, okay,
let me talk to him.
Let me talk to him.
Let me talk to him. Wait!
OFFlCER: Sir, sir, I need to
get your hands away from your body.
Jimmy, put the gun down.
Why?
I got nothing left.
I got nothing.
You got me. Okay?
You got your family.
This is only about money.
We can get you money.
This isn't you.
This is the coward's way. Put it down.
It's my only way out, Danny.
No, it isn't.
We can... We got another plan.
I promise.
Just put it down.
Put the gun down.
I'm sorry, Danny.
(GUN COCKlNG)
Where's my money?
It's not really your money.
Okay, okay, okay, okay,
it's upstairs.
Room 1 222.
Let's go.
Erica, will you do me a favor and send a bottle
of Dom up to the honeymoon suite?
Sure thing, Sam.
Thank you.
Could you move, please?
Thank you.
He's a dead man.
All right, take a seat.
Where's my money?
It's in the closet.
I'll get it for you.
Oh, no, no, no, no.
I'll take care of it.
Sit down.
Put it down now!
Put the weapon down!
Up against the wall!
I'll be seeing you real soon.
I know where you live.
I just moved.
(OFFlCER READlNG RlGHTS)
Where's the money, Mike?
How in the hell did you
end up with all this money?
I was just trying to get
my wallet back is all.
Just between you and me,
weren't you tempted?
A little bit?
Never.
Now, if you'll excuse me,
I've got a barbeque to build.
Hi. Where you been?
I was helping a friend.
What's going on here?
Oh, I'm just making my
famous Chicken Delinda.
For 300?
It's my plan to show the city of Las
Vegas the kind of person I really am.
You want them to look
at you as a cook?
Not as a cook,
a philanthropist.
I'm not sure giving away
chicken is considered philanthropy.
Oh, but it is.
Okay, here's my idea.
From excess to progress, the Montecito
will feed and house the homeless.
Sounds good.
Yeah, doesn't it?
Look at all this chicken here.
The cooks were just
going to chuck it.
I'm going to take it down to
People's Park and feed the homeless.
I've organized a big kickoff event.
All the local press will be there.
And then people will get to
see the kind of person I really am.
Don't you think
that's a good idea?
I think that if it makes you
feel better, it's a fantastic idea.
I do, too.
You okay?
Yeah, I'm fine.
You sure?
Yeah. Things worked out, so...
I'm going to let you get back to work.
Save me some.
I'll see you at home.
Bye, bye.
Wish me luck.
Good luck.
Keith, open up! It's Sam!
Hey, hey, I'm coming. Okay. Hey, I was
in the shower. What the hell's going on?
I think you know exactly
what's going on, don't you?
Do you really think that
you could show up here,
take advantage of Mary and
no one's going to do anything about it?
See, brother, I don't care who you are,
what kind of superstar you think you are.
No one pulls
this crap with me.
Oh, how interesting.
Who you got in there?
Another unwilling participant in
your little sex fantasy?
You see, Sam?
I'm gay.
Wow.
We have the same taste.
What are you doing with Mary?
If anyone ever found out,
my career would be over.
Oh, right, so you invite women out
so you can be seen with them in public.
Yes, and when I told Mary about Terry,
she ran out of here.
Look, Sam, I'm sorry.
No, no, no, please. It's okay.
I'll take care of Mary.
You two go back to doing
whatever it is you two do.
Sam.
Yeah?
Can we keep this between us?
Oh, sure, yeah.
You were never here, Mr. Guthrie.
Thanks, Sam.
I knew I was sexy.
So, we okay?
Yeah.
Sorry I was so bitchy.
Feels good, doesn't it?
Little.
All right, I was
Really? a little jealous.
Just a little bit.
Thank you.
What do you think? Gay?
Let's find out.
Come to mommy.
I'm here with Delinda Deline
of the Montecito Hotel
who has a plan to help eradicate
Las Vegas's homeless problem.
Not eradicate, help.
MAN 1: Is this chicken cooked?
It's our program called
From Excess to Progress.
Why do you call it that?
Well, we're hoping this is the
start of... MAN 2: Mine smells funny.
MAN 3: This chicken's making
my back hurt!
Are you getting this?
There's something in the
chicken that's making them drop...
No, no, no, turn that off.
Turn that off. I'm really not like this.
What's all this?
Congratulations, Ed.
Congratulations, what?
You passed.
I passed? Even under
the most trying circumstances,
you put in place the
techniques that we spoke about.
You were able to keep
your anger in check.
Oh. Uh, so, all you guys,
you were just...
Yeah.
What a guy.
We needed to evaluate you in extreme
circumstances, under controlled conditions.
And I must say, you surprised
even me with your results.
What now?
So, nothing.
Our work here is done.
I already called the
commission and recommended
that your license be
fully renewed.
They approved it this morning.
Really? So, that's it.
My license has been renewed?
Congratulations, Ed.
You're anger-free.
At least nobody died,
which is good, you know?
How you doing?
Oh, I should have left it alone.
Sometimes things
just don't work out.
Sometimes they do.
See you around.
Oh!
Oh, God, I didn't see you.
I mean, you couldn't see me.
I mean I really wasn't looking,
but, um, I'm really not like this.
Just let it go.
I can make it better.
Just let it go.
Ed, what the hell
are you doing?
This is what you get for torturing me,
you sorry son of a bitch!
Stop! Please!
Why the hell should l?
It's not my car.
Who the hell's car is it?
It's my car.
Sorry, Doc.
Holy crap.
Sorry.
Las Vegas. It's another beautiful day.
For those of you driving near the Strip,
be careful.
There's a bull on the loose.
That's right. I said a bull.
God, I love this town.
Hey, Mike.
Hey.
You ever have
one of those days?
Yeah, I'm having one now.
Not that kind of day,
the other kind.
You know, where you wake up happy and
the light just seems to dance differently
and the birds are chirping
and your heart is open.
No. I don't have those days.
But you can, you know?
I finally realized
that it's just about attitude.
You can choose exactly
how you want to feel.
Ah.
Like, look at this guy.
He's made a choice to be happy.
I don't think that's happy.
I'll be right back.
Delinda.
Hey. How are you doing?
Beautiful day, isn't it?
Like how you dance.
That's right. Keep it moving.
Hey, what are you doing
to my husband?
Oh, I'm just following
his lead.
He's not dancing.
He's had a stroke.
And I'm sure if he could talk, he would
tell you that he doesn't appreciate
you making fun of him.
But l...
Save it.
Yo, that was
cold-blooded, D.
But I didn't mean...
Save it.
How's your day going now? Hmm?
Mm...
Those birds still chirping?
Danny!
Hey. Hey.
Your boy, Jim, who you got
the valet job for is looking for you.
Hey, did you hear about the
rodeo bull running down the street?
Is this a joke?
No, I heard about it on the radio.
I guess some truck with a bunch
of bulls from the Vegas rodeo crashed.
One of them got away and I guess
they lost him somewhere behind the Wynn.
How do you lose
a 2,000-pound bull?
Bulls are surprisingly crafty. And
if I were you, I would change that tie.
Don't wear anything red.
They hate red.
No red, cool. So, uh, listen, I
was hoping I could borrow some scratch.
Yeah, man. What do you need?
Uh, I got...
Ten grand.
What do you need
ten grand for?
Remember the condo
I put a bid on?
No.
Well, I put a bid on a condo and now
the seller's asking for another ten G's.
He says I got to have it by today
or he's going to go with another offer.
I got to have this place, man.
I wish
that I could help you...
But you can't.
Why don't you ask
Ed for an advance?
He can be quite generous
when he's not being insane.
If you do, do not let him guilt you into
doing anything for him around the house.
This is very important.
What are you talking about?
Well, l... I asked to borrow
a couple grand to fix up my car.
The next thing you know I'm hanging
drywall for him in his guesthouse.
I didn't know
he had a guesthouse.
You see what I mean?
Good luck. And remember, no red.
Dude, I just saw a bull
running through the parking lot.
MAN 1: No way!
You serious?
MAN 2: I'm so hammered.
(CELL PHONE RlNGlNG)
Yeah?
What? Where?
I'm on my way.
DANNY: Jimmy?
You looking for me?
Danny, hey.
Hey. How's the new job?
Good. Real good.
The tips
are really something here.
You know, you just keep
grinding it out
and you'll be
out of your hole in no time.
Yeah. About that.
I mean, this is real hard
for me to ask.
Jimmy, it's me.
Just tell me what you need.
Money.
Well, that seems like
a common theme today.
I've got, uh, a couple hundred.
No, I need more than that.
A lot more.
You know what, I'm sorry.
Forget I even asked.
I can... I can probably
come up with a couple grand.
No, no, no.
Don't worry about it, okay?
Okay. Are you sure?
It's all good.
Okay.
Let me get back to work.
(CELL PHONE RlNGlNG)
Yeah, Mike.
In where?
Sanitation just found him.
All right. Call Metro.
Victim had what looked to
be a.38-caliber bullet in his head.
And the card of a Montecito
employee in his pocket.
Well, that's Jimmy Willis's card.
He's a valet here.
Yeah. I'm going to need
to talk to him.
Hey, it's Jimmy.
Listen, I need more time
to come up with the money.
No, please.
Just one more week... Please.
MlKE: Still no lD
on the body.
Metro is wrapping it up. They
should be out of here in about an hour.
Do whatever you can to help,
but keep it quiet.
By the way,
what happened to your tie?
Oh, see, uh, a bull got loose
from the rodeo...
and Danny said not to wear anything
red because it drives them crazy.
And they're crafty. So, I took off
my tie because it was red.
Never mind.
Uh, listen, Ed, I need to ask you something
and you know I wouldn't ask you unless...
How much?
What?
What? How much?
Um...
Ten thousand.
See, I'm buying
a condo and...
Fine.
Ed, thank you.
I will pay you back
as soon as I can.
I know that.
So, listen, Mike, I've been
thinking of building one of them
brick barbeques for the house.
Something nice out there by the pool.
Yeah.
What do you say you come over
Saturday and give me a little hand, huh?
Saturday?
Yeah.
Saturday, I'd love to
but I'm moving my stuff into
the new place. So, maybe if we, um...
What's up?
Ran out of ink or something.
Did you say Saturday?
Yeah.
Because Saturday, you know, Saturday
is good for me. Saturday is wide open.
Uh, how about 10:00 a.m.?
How about 7:00?
Even better.
Look at that.
It's writing again. Wow.
Do me a favor and, um...
don't cash this in here. I
don't want people to think I'm a softy.
You got it.
I guess we'll see you,
uh, 6:30, Saturday morning.
All that stuff will be out back there.
Try to keep the noise down.
Please put on a tie, will you?
You got it, Ed. Thank you!
All right.
(CELL PHONE RlNGlNG)
Yeah?
What do you mean, two guys
from State Gaming are here?
To see me?
They were here
three weeks ago.
This is starting
to piss me off, okay?
Hey, I wonder what
he's like in person.
I mean, I know what he's like. Or
at least, I think I know what he's like,
but I wonder
what he's really, really like.
They say he smells really good
all the time and...
Hey...
He has a huge...
Hi.
Hi.
Who are you talking about?
Uh... Keith Mannix.
Who's Keith Mannix?
Who's Keith Mannix?
Mmm-hmm.
Who is Keith Mannix?
That's what I just said.
Who's Keith Mannix?
Uh, three-time MVP,
seven-time all star,
number three on
People's most eligible list
drop-dead gorgeous
Keith Mannix.
So, pro basketball player,
Keith Mannix? Yes.
He's staying here with us,
in our hotel.
Yeah, how come
he's not on my VlP list?
All I have is some guy named
Moses Guthrie. And I don't know...
That's him.
Moses Guthrie is Keith Mannix? Yes.
Moses Guthrie was Doctor
J's character's name in the movie.
The Fish That
Saved Pittsburgh.
He always travels
under that name.
Why do you know that?
I read Jet.
Of course you do.
Last time I hosted a basketball player,
all he did was hit on me the whole time.
Well, Keith is not like that. His player
bio describes him as very sensitive.
Oh, really?
Yes.
Let me explain something
to you, Mary.
All pro basketball players are the same.
Egotistical, womanizing attention whores.
I don't plan on giving him any different
treatment than I would any other VlP.
Excuse me, Sam?
Yeah.
Mr. Guthrie?
Please, call me Keith.
I use Guthrie
to fly under the radar.
Well, hi, Keith.
Welcome to the Montecito.
We have a lovely suite
available for you,
so if you will follow me,
I will take you right to it.
I want to sign your balls.
No... I... Want you
to sign my balls?
If you could sign my balls...
Will you please sign
my ball for me?
Okay.
Please? Thank you.
Okay.
There you go.
Thank you.
Okay. Right this way.
Thanks.
Okay.
Thank you.
Hey, Sharon.
Hey.
Did you have
any complaints today?
No.
Oh, thank God.
As a matter of fact, it's been
a good day around here.
We settled a possible
discrimination suit.
What was it about?
It was a reaction by a worker
to a customer telling an awful joke.
He wanted to sue us claiming
a hostile work environment.
What was the joke?
(TELEPHONE RlNGlNG)
You'll excuse me.
Human Resources,
this is Sharon.
Actually, he just walked in
to sign the settlement.
"A black eye, a fat lip
and a job."
What? That's it, man. I'm not signing
any damn settlement. You know what?
Now I am suing your ass.
What? Me? No, no, no, no, no.
I was just reading.
My lawyers will be in touch.
No, no, no, no, no. I'm sorry.
I'm really not like this.
I'll write him a note.
That's two.
Two visits in one month.
Why is the Gaming Commission
busting my balls?
Well, sir,
a number of complaints
involving the Montecito
have come to our attention.
And because we regulate the
Montecito's gaming license,
the inquiries fall
into our jurisdiction.
May we?
No.
What...
What kind of complaints
are we talking about here?
Some of the grievances cited
unprofessional conduct in the Montecito,
while others ranged from verbal intimidation
to actual physical confrontation.
Just give me the names
of these employees cited
and I will investigate
each matter internally.
All the complaints filed are
against you personally, Mr. Deline.
Me?
Let me see the complaints.
I'm sorry, but we can't.
To avoid retaliation,
we do not disclose the
complaining party's information.
Smart.
Yeah. So, where does
that leave me?
Am I supposed to get a lawyer
or something like that?
Only if you want to dispute
these charges in front of the board.
Keep in mind, though, that if you're
found guilty of even a single charge,
you will be forced to forfeit
the Montecito's gaming license.
That would be, uh, not good.
What's behind
door number two?
You agree to treatment by one of the
board-certified specialists in this area.
What kind of specialist
are we talking about?
Anger management? You want
me to go to an anger management class?
What are you, out of your mind?
I'll go.
I'll make an appointment.
Today. And remember, if this
doesn't go well...
The Montecito will lose its
gambling license. Have a nice day.
So, I reserved the cabana
for you at the pool.
And if there's anything else
that you might need during your stay,
please don't hesitate to ask.
Well, there is one more thing
you can do for me.
You see, I hate dining alone
and I would really enjoy the company
of a beautiful woman
at dinner tonight.
Well, that's
such a nice offer, but...
I would love to
ask your friend.
My friend?
Yeah, the girl downstairs
holding the basketball.
Downstairs... Oh, Mary?
Mary. Okay. Yeah. Yeah.
I would love to ask Mary.
Oh, her? Really?
Okay. Well, you should do...
You should go for it.
So...
Welcome to the Montecito.
Hi. Are you new
to the program?
Am I what?
Are you new to the program?
Oh, uh, yeah.
Well, come on in.
We're about to get started.
How you doing?
PAUL: It looks like we have somebody
new today. What's your name, friend?
I'm Ed.
Hi, Ed.
ED: How you doing, guys?
Welcome, Ed.
Why don't you share a little
something about yourself with the group?
Like what?
Like when did you first realize
that you might have a problem?
Well, I mean,
I really wouldn't call it a problem.
That's denial, Eddie.
Denial, man. Let it out, brother.
Let go of your pain.
I haven't got any pain.
And it's never Eddie,
douche bag.
Ed, you have friends here.
It's okay to let go.
Now close your eyes.
Get the hell out of here.
Please, close your eyes.
No, you please.
Ed. Please.
Okay.
Now relax.
Take yourself back
to that first time.
What was happening around you that
made you want to publicly masturbate?
What did you just say to me?
What made you want
to masturbate in public?
I don't do that, you creep.
What are you running here,
a freak show?
This is a workshop.
What, a workshop
for jag offs?
For chronic
and public masturbators.
Jeez! You're a bunch
of sick animals.
Bastards, why don't you
cut your hands off or something.
Take a pill,
you sick bastards.
(SlGHS)
Bob, close your eyes.
Gladly.
Mr. Deline, you're late.
Yeah, I'm, uh...
I'm really sorry about that.
I accidentally walked
into this disgusting...
Well, never mind.
I'm Dr. Sassen.
How are you?
You shake like a girl.
What?
Your handshake
is like a little girl's.
Here's an idea for you.
How about I crack you right
in the mouth and that way you...
It was a test.
You had me there good.
I just wanted to get a sense
of what I'm dealing with here.
Yeah, so, what do we do now?
We have some work to do.
Please.
JlMMY: I told the police what I knew.
I met the guy at a VA support group.
The cops are looking at you
as their only lead.
I didn't have anything to do
with that guy's death.
Can you prove that?
Why do I have to?
Jimmy, they found your card.
There was something.
At our support meeting, Jack,
that's the dead guy's name...
Jack says he met some guy
at the blood bank
who passes out little black business
cards with a phone number on them.
Tell me about the card.
Gets you into a big stakes
Russian roulette game.
They'll pay you 20 grand to pull
the trigger with one bullet in the gun.
Forty grand with two bullets.
Like that.
So, you're telling me this guy
played Russian roulette?
Yeah. And lost.
Jimmy, please tell me you're not thinking
about doing something like this.
No. My folks sent me some money.
It's all taken care of.
So, can I go now?
Yeah. Yeah.
I'll talk to you later.
You still looking for players?
Okay, Ed,
how would you react
if a man stood
right in front of you
and said he was going to
knock your teeth
down your throat?
Well, Doc, see the first
thing you do is you kind of take
a half step to the right so you can't
get hit with a straight right hand.
Then I take my thumb and
I go right for this eyeball...
No.
What do you mean? No?
No.
Though these are antagonistic words,
you have to defuse the situation.
And go to that place of peace
that's within you.
Oh, l, uh... I don't...
I don't think so, Doc.
We know it is not an easy
place to get to and that is why
we've developed
a very effective tool.
This is your anger pillow.
My... My anger pillow?
I want you to keep it with you
at all times
and at the first sign of feeling angry,
I want you to squeeze it.
Squeeze the angry pillow?
Squeeze it and transport
yourself to that peaceful place.
Give it a try.
How about I just smother you
to death with it?
How about I call Agent Watman?
I'll take the pillow.
Now, remember, keep it with you
at all times.
And you squeeze it whenever you feel
anger coming on. That's the first step.
Good, good.
Now, within 24 hours,
you're going to feel like a new man.
What's this
24-hour bit?
Oh, well, for the next day, you're going
to be observed in your work environment.
And based on our findings,
we'll either recommend or not
to suspend your license
with the commission.
You're going to follow me
around for 24 hours?
No, no, no, no. We're just going
to check up on you from time to time,
make sure you're following
the program. That's all.
Remember, Ed,
find your happy place.
And squeeze the pillow.
Thanks, Doc.
Hey, man. Hey, that's my car!
Hey, stop, you son of a bitch! Hey!
Hey, Doc.
Listen, I need a ride...
Oh, my God, you will never
believe what just happened to me.
Keith asked you to dinner.
Keith asked me to dinner.
Wow. What a surprise.
Have fun.
Okay. What do you think
I should wear?
I was thinking that little black
number with super high heels so he
doesn't have to bend down
too far to kiss me.
I'm not real interested
in your date with Keith.
Oh, okay. I just... I thought
you would be happy for me.
No, I think that you shouldn't
get too caught up with him because
he's a basketball player
and he has women all over the world.
You're jealous.
What?
Jealous.
Not.
You're mad because
he likes me and not you.
Listen to me carefully. I could
care less about a man like Keith Mannix.
I'm sorry you feel that way, but it's
not my fault that he thinks that I'm
sexy and not you.
What? Are you high?
Ninety-eight hundred,
ninety-nine hundred, ten thousand.
Thank you.
This is a robbery!
Do as we say or you're dead.
Right now! You, you, move!
Everybody out of this room now!
Move it! Move it! Move it!
Hey, you down! Get down on
your knees! Now! This is no joke!
Nobody moves.
Everybody lives.
Come on. Come on.
Quicker. Give him the money.
Put the money in the bag.
It's going to be okay.
Wallets, watches,
cell phones.
Take it off.
Give me your wallet.
Don't even think about it.
What do we got here?
Open it up.
Slowly.
Holding out on me?
(ALARM RlNGlNG)
Let's go! Let's go!
Damn it!
Watch it, old man.
What?
I said watch it, old man!
Next time I'm going to shatter
your old hip all over this casino.
Shatter. Um...
Listen, you have yourself
a nice day and I'm sorry.
Daddy?
Yeah.
Why are you carrying a pillow?
Because I'm angry.
Oh, shouldn't it be
because you're tired?
Honey, I hear you're telling
dirty jokes.
Not dirty jokes, racist jokes.
Yeah. Don't do that.
I need you
to do me a big favor.
I need to close down that
blackjack table over there.
So I need all the people to
move to another table over there
and why don't we just set up
this whole section?
Well, it's just that...
Thanks, sweetie. That's really great.
And, uh, just please behave yourself.
Hi, folks, I'm sorry but we need to
close down this section of the casino.
We have another table waiting
for you just right over there.
So, if you'll just
make your way.
Again sir, I'm sorry for the inconvenience,
but I do need to close this table down.
Just one minute.
Okay.
Please, sir, we have another
table just right over there.
I know. Just a minute.
I'd be happy to offer you a
free dinner tonight if you'd kindly move
to the next table.
Like I said,
I'm going to need a minute.
Okay, pal, enough is enough.
Just tell me. What's it going to take
to get you to that table over there?
My wheelchair.
Oh, oh, I'm so sorry.
If I could reach you,
I'd punch you in the mouth.
I hate this town.
Well, see the thing is,
I want the condo, but I just got robbed.
This happens all the time.
Don't worry.
And now I got to get up at
6:30 in the morning, that's right,
6:30 in the morning and build
a damn barbeque.
I hate this town!
They really do hate red.
Help me.
(TlRES SQUEALlNG)
Danny, you got to do
something about the valet.
It's so backed up, I can't
get the limos in for my big players.
Well, why is it backed up?
I don't know. Rick said some
guy called in sick and your buddy,
Timmy... Jimmy. Yeah. Jimmy quit. Jimmy.
What? Why?
I don't know. Who cares? But it's affecting
business so go take care of it.
Hey, I'm sexy, right?
Right.
Right.
Damn it, Jimmy.
You don't have a son
by that name?
Okay. Thank you.
Sorry to bother you.
Hello, Mr. Willis, do you have
a son James? United States Marine Corps?
You do? Good.
Uh, my name is Danny McCoy.
I was in the same platoon
as your son.
Well, l, uh... I think that
Jimmy may be in a little trouble.
Okay.
Okay, well, he said
that you sent him some money.
You didn't?
Okay.
Okay. Well, if you hear from him, please
tell him to call me as soon as you can.
Danny McCoy.
All right. Thank you, sir.
Carl, I need to put some
money in the safe.
Oh, okay, Mike.
I just wanted mine.
What?
Um, forget the safe.
I need a room.
Um, sure thing, Mike.
How long are you going to
be needing the room?
Hey, Pam, it's Mike.
Yes, I still want the condo
and I have the money.
Bingo.
Lost, white boy?
Looking for Wallace.
Don't know no Wallace.
I heard he rolls down here.
"Rolls"?
Check out the white boy.
You five-O?
No.
If you're not five-O,
why are you packing then?
Just tell Wallace Danny
McCoy wants to speak to him.
You better pray
Wallace heard of your ass.
How about this weather, huh?
It's crazy.
Danny McCoy.
I've heard of you,
but I don't know you.
Why you calling on me?
I need information.
What do I get out of it?
Nothing.
Except I could owe you.
Wallace is listening.
An underground Russian roulette game,
time and place?
Now, why you want to go
and get involved in all that?
Time and place.
Now you owe Wallace.
MlKE: Ed, I just want to
say thanks again. I got the condo.
Hey, please. Any time.
That's a nice pillow.
Thanks a lot.
You heard about this bank
robbery that went down this morning?
Yeah. Yeah.
I heard something about it.
Well, you know, see, people
hear this kind of stuff on the news
and they get
these weird ideas.
That's why I want a couple of
extra security guys on the casino floor,
you know, for a couple days.
You got it. You got it.
Hey, what about that bull?
What happened with the bull?
The bull...
The police... Two jag offs... Apparently
when they were running away from cops,
they smashed into that bull.
One of the guys they found dead and the
other guy got away with the money. So.
What's the matter?
Nothing. Uh, let me work on
getting that extra security in here.
Oh, Mike, let's make it
6:00 on Saturday.
I figure this way you can,
you know, finish up by sun down.
And then we can all relax, sit
down and barbeque a few steaks together.
It will be nice, no?
Yeah.
Nice.
Yeah.
Excuse me, Mr. Deline.
Yeah. What can I do for you?
Oh, hey, nice pillow.
Yeah. Thanks a lot.
Um, that gentleman at the bar
has had way too much to drink.
And we've cut him off,
but he's refusing to leave.
Okay. I'll take care of it.
Thank you.
Excuse me, sir, I'm afraid we're going
to have to ask you to leave the hotel.
I will leave when I'm ready to leave.
All right? Not a second before that.
Listen, uh, sir, either you
leave the hotel
or I'm going to have to
call the police.
And they'll remove you.
You don't want that, now,
do you?
Okay. Okay. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Great.
Can I just get a glass of water,
please, before I leave?
Absolutely.
Some water, please.
Thank you.
Hey, you want to hear a joke?
Um, no.
Okay, what's the difference
between you and me?
What is it?
I'm dry.
I'm dry.
Come on!
Thank you.
I need to be punished.
I need dirty sex.
I need dirty freaky sex.
After he hangs up,
I like dirty, freaky, nasty sex.
Well, I'm glad you're coming.
Yeah, well,
I miss your body, too.
I can't wait to see you.
I love you, too.
Bye.
Oh, hey, listen,
I need to talk to you.
I don't want to keep...
No, you're not going
out with Keith.
Want to bet?
Listen to me.
He has a girl coming to his hotel room.
I just heard him on the phone.
He said, "l love you" to her.
You are unbelievable.
There's no end to how far you'll go.
He likes me. Not you.
So do yourself a favor,
get over it.
Mary, Mary, Mary.
How you doing?
Good.
You look great.
Thank you.
(CELL PHONE DlALlNG)
Police officers!
Let me see your hands!
Move!
Police officers! Put the gun down!
Wait, wait, okay,
let me talk to him.
Let me talk to him.
Let me talk to him. Wait!
OFFlCER: Sir, sir, I need to
get your hands away from your body.
Jimmy, put the gun down.
Why?
I got nothing left.
I got nothing.
You got me. Okay?
You got your family.
This is only about money.
We can get you money.
This isn't you.
This is the coward's way. Put it down.
It's my only way out, Danny.
No, it isn't.
We can... We got another plan.
I promise.
Just put it down.
Put the gun down.
I'm sorry, Danny.
(GUN COCKlNG)
Where's my money?
It's not really your money.
Okay, okay, okay, okay,
it's upstairs.
Room 1 222.
Let's go.
Erica, will you do me a favor and send a bottle
of Dom up to the honeymoon suite?
Sure thing, Sam.
Thank you.
Could you move, please?
Thank you.
He's a dead man.
All right, take a seat.
Where's my money?
It's in the closet.
I'll get it for you.
Oh, no, no, no, no.
I'll take care of it.
Sit down.
Put it down now!
Put the weapon down!
Up against the wall!
I'll be seeing you real soon.
I know where you live.
I just moved.
(OFFlCER READlNG RlGHTS)
Where's the money, Mike?
How in the hell did you
end up with all this money?
I was just trying to get
my wallet back is all.
Just between you and me,
weren't you tempted?
A little bit?
Never.
Now, if you'll excuse me,
I've got a barbeque to build.
Hi. Where you been?
I was helping a friend.
What's going on here?
Oh, I'm just making my
famous Chicken Delinda.
For 300?
It's my plan to show the city of Las
Vegas the kind of person I really am.
You want them to look
at you as a cook?
Not as a cook,
a philanthropist.
I'm not sure giving away
chicken is considered philanthropy.
Oh, but it is.
Okay, here's my idea.
From excess to progress, the Montecito
will feed and house the homeless.
Sounds good.
Yeah, doesn't it?
Look at all this chicken here.
The cooks were just
going to chuck it.
I'm going to take it down to
People's Park and feed the homeless.
I've organized a big kickoff event.
All the local press will be there.
And then people will get to
see the kind of person I really am.
Don't you think
that's a good idea?
I think that if it makes you
feel better, it's a fantastic idea.
I do, too.
You okay?
Yeah, I'm fine.
You sure?
Yeah. Things worked out, so...
I'm going to let you get back to work.
Save me some.
I'll see you at home.
Bye, bye.
Wish me luck.
Good luck.
Keith, open up! It's Sam!
Hey, hey, I'm coming. Okay. Hey, I was
in the shower. What the hell's going on?
I think you know exactly
what's going on, don't you?
Do you really think that
you could show up here,
take advantage of Mary and
no one's going to do anything about it?
See, brother, I don't care who you are,
what kind of superstar you think you are.
No one pulls
this crap with me.
Oh, how interesting.
Who you got in there?
Another unwilling participant in
your little sex fantasy?
You see, Sam?
I'm gay.
Wow.
We have the same taste.
What are you doing with Mary?
If anyone ever found out,
my career would be over.
Oh, right, so you invite women out
so you can be seen with them in public.
Yes, and when I told Mary about Terry,
she ran out of here.
Look, Sam, I'm sorry.
No, no, no, please. It's okay.
I'll take care of Mary.
You two go back to doing
whatever it is you two do.
Sam.
Yeah?
Can we keep this between us?
Oh, sure, yeah.
You were never here, Mr. Guthrie.
Thanks, Sam.
I knew I was sexy.
So, we okay?
Yeah.
Sorry I was so bitchy.
Feels good, doesn't it?
Little.
All right, I was
Really? a little jealous.
Just a little bit.
Thank you.
What do you think? Gay?
Let's find out.
Come to mommy.
I'm here with Delinda Deline
of the Montecito Hotel
who has a plan to help eradicate
Las Vegas's homeless problem.
Not eradicate, help.
MAN 1: Is this chicken cooked?
It's our program called
From Excess to Progress.
Why do you call it that?
Well, we're hoping this is the
start of... MAN 2: Mine smells funny.
MAN 3: This chicken's making
my back hurt!
Are you getting this?
There's something in the
chicken that's making them drop...
No, no, no, turn that off.
Turn that off. I'm really not like this.
What's all this?
Congratulations, Ed.
Congratulations, what?
You passed.
I passed? Even under
the most trying circumstances,
you put in place the
techniques that we spoke about.
You were able to keep
your anger in check.
Oh. Uh, so, all you guys,
you were just...
Yeah.
What a guy.
We needed to evaluate you in extreme
circumstances, under controlled conditions.
And I must say, you surprised
even me with your results.
What now?
So, nothing.
Our work here is done.
I already called the
commission and recommended
that your license be
fully renewed.
They approved it this morning.
Really? So, that's it.
My license has been renewed?
Congratulations, Ed.
You're anger-free.
At least nobody died,
which is good, you know?
How you doing?
Oh, I should have left it alone.
Sometimes things
just don't work out.
Sometimes they do.
See you around.
Oh!
Oh, God, I didn't see you.
I mean, you couldn't see me.
I mean I really wasn't looking,
but, um, I'm really not like this.
Just let it go.
I can make it better.
Just let it go.
Ed, what the hell
are you doing?
This is what you get for torturing me,
you sorry son of a bitch!
Stop! Please!
Why the hell should l?
It's not my car.
Who the hell's car is it?
It's my car.
Sorry, Doc.
Holy crap.
Sorry.