Las Vegas (2003–2008): Season 4, Episode 10 - Fleeting Cheating Meeting - full transcript

Hey, did Ed just ask you
to meet him at the front desk?

Yeah. You too?
Yeah. What's up?

Hey, sweetie.
Hey.

Meeting Ed at the front desk? Mmm-hmm.

So you want all of us to welcome
back this Nicole who used to work here?

First of all,
it's not "this" Nicole.

I don't refer to you as
this Mike Cannon, do l?

Well, it's just that I don't know her.
I know her.

I hired her
right out of high school.

Her old man wasn't around so I kind of,
you know, became her dad.

Anyway, she ran off and
got married this last year.



And this weekend is my
first-anniversary gift to her.

Right out of high school?
Don't you have to be 21 to work here?

Why don't you
just report me?

Hey, I just want to make sure
I'm up to date on the regs.

Nicole? That ring any bells?
You guys know her?

No.
I know her.

Daddy introduced me after
he sort of took her under his wing.

She's cute, worked in the coffee shop.
Danny, you must know her.

DANNY: Yeah, a little.

Hey, Steve.
Hi, Steve.

Hey.
Hi.

Hey, everyone.
What good fortune.

All of my landlords
together in one place.

Wow. This is harder
than I thought it would be.



What is it, Steve?

Steve and I won't be
renewing our lease next month.

I got an offer from the
new Wynn Casino in Macau.

And it was such a fabulous opportunity
I just couldn't turn it down.

But we love you all.
And we loved living in your home.

All the best to you.
Take care, my man.

There you go. There you go.
There you go.

Yeah. Okay. Okay.

I better get to work.

Now I have to
find a new tenant.

You know
what a hassle that was?

(ALL SlGHlNG)

Hey!
You remember everyone?

Nicole.
Hi. How are you?

Married.
Wow. I heard.

When everyone heard
you were coming here,

they insisted
on a welcoming committee.

Aw.

Hi.
Hey, Nicole.

This is my husband, Ollie.

Hey.
Hey.

We really appreciate this.

Thank you.
Thank you so much.

Hey, forget
about all that.

Ollie, here's your key.
Go start having a good time, all right?

Thank you.

All right then.

Danny, Mike.
My office, 10 minutes.

This is your fault.

This Ollie guy, I want you to watch him.
Last name Querim.

Okay. Why?

I don't like him
and I don't trust him.

You just met him.

What kind of name is Ollie
for a grown man?

A very suspicious one.
I'll run a background check?

Yeah, I did. He's clean.

But, you know,
he's up to something

and I don't want him
hurting Nicole.

Well, what is he up to?

I don't know.

But I'm an excellent judge
of character and his is bad.

And I'm also the guy
that signs your paycheck.

We'll be watching him like a hawk,
sir. Good.

Check the front desk
at about 3:00 this afternoon.

Get an image of an Ollie
Querim checking in then VideolQ him.

Got it.

I don't know why Ed's
so into this Nicole.

I mean, I know her
and she's all right,

but do you believe all that
"excellent judge of character" stuff?

(SNlCKERS)

Yes, I do.

The girl's back
is to the camera

so you can't really
see who she is.

It ain't Nicole.
That's pretty obvious.

But she does
look familiar.

I think we should tell Ed.

I think that when Ed said
he wanted us to watch him,

he meant to watch for
something a little more serious

than making out with
some chick in the elevator.

No. Nicole is like
Ed's daughter.

So his daughter's newlywed
husband is cheating on her.

Where did you go to school,
MlT or Uptight University?

Twenty-two seconds of kissing
in an elevator, is that cheating?

I don't know. Maybe.

First of all, they go up,
then go back down

and we don't know what
happens after they leave.

And second, I think most
people would consider this cheating.

I agree. But a lot
of people come to Vegas

so they can do that kind
of stuff and get away with it.

Is this Ollie cat your boy?
How come you got his back like this?

I'm just saying if we
start keeping video files

on every dude that has
a little fun in the elevator...

Wait, let's cut
to the chase.

If we don't tell Ed and
Ed finds out we didn't tell him,

he's going to
can our asses.

I'm not calling him
at 2:00 a.m. for this.

First thing in the morning,
and you better be here.

You better be here.

Yeah. I'll be here.

Please bring Mr. Querim
to my office.

And what are
you going to do?

Convey my disappointment.

Convey verbally or otherwise?

I know that sometimes,
you know,

guys come to Vegas and
this sort of stuff happens.

Yeah. That's exactly what I said.

And if that's all
it was, then,

I don't know, maybe it's
none of our business, you know?

Point taken.

So, would you guys please
find this young fellow

and bring him up here
before I find him

and gouge out his eyeballs.

(DOOR CLOSlNG)

So, tell me everything,

Ollie, life in Fresno,
married life...

Where do I start?

Well, Fresno isn't Vegas.
That's for sure.

But that's where
Ollie's business is.

They make TV stands.
Except now with all the flat screens,

the stands are changing

and so the company's
been having some trouble.

Lot of trouble.
So, we sort of had to cut back.

You know, no more new clothes,
no manicures, no dinners out.

Oh, well, I'm sure
business will turn around.

You know, it just seems like
everything changed once we got married.

The money, his personality,
the money.

Everything's so tense now.

Well, now, you know every
marriage has its rough patches.

Yeah.

You know,
I don't have any proof,

but I kind of have a hunch
that Ollie's cheated on me.

You're kidding. I'm sorry.

Oh, enough about my stupid problems.
How are you?

Well, the job's good

and Danny and l are living together,
and it's going so great.

Oh, he's such a great guy.

Isn't he?

No wonder he dumped me.

I didn't know you two...
Oh, yeah.

Right when I moved from
housekeeping to the coffee shop.

It was pretty hot and
heavy there for a few months.

But, I don't know,
I guess he just got sick of me.

No.

I'm sure that wasn't it.

But this is fun.
Fun.

Cheers.
Cheers.

This is fun.
Yeah. So fun.

Learn something new
every day.

Yeah.

SAM: I know the OK Go concert's
sold out, but I need tickets.

MARY: Yeah?

My whale, Mr. Slocum's
in town and he's a big fan.

Oh, yeah?

Actually, Delinda told
me that Nicole's a huge fan, too.

So I've arranged a private
meeting in her suite.

They're going to show her
how to do

that whole skating
on the treadmills thing.

Oh, the treadmill thing?

From their video.
When are they going to do that?

Tomorrow, 1:00.
Interesting.

Delinda's with Nicole
so Ollie is probably alone.

Unless he's with
his elevator buddy.

I'll call upstairs,
have them do a VideolQ.

Hey, Steve.

Heard about the big move.
Congratulations.

Is that your attempt
at some sort of cruel humor?

You don't want
to go to Macau?

I wasn't invited.

Yes, it's true. Steve has cast
me away like so much rancid milk.

I'm sorry.

You guys always seemed like
you got along pretty well.

He's the most stubborn man
I've ever met.

He refuses to accept
how much we need each other.

And what about
our Disneyana collection?

We built that collection
together.

How can he bear to see
that torn asunder?

How can you divide up
seven dwarves?

Talk to him.
He respects you.

You know, I don't think
that's such a good idea.

I think that's something...

You guys need to work
that out amongst yourselves.

Listen, Steve, we are sort
of on our way to a meeting. So...

So, your allegiance
is with the stubborn one.

That's not
what we said, Steve.

I should have known.

Aw...

Here we go.

Hey, Ollie,
how's it going?

Great. We're having
a wonderful time.

Ed was wondering if he could
have a word with you up in his office?

About what?

Oh, I don't know,

maybe how thrilled he is
to be comping your weekend.

Here you are.

You can take
that with you.

I would love to,
but I have a golf lesson at 3:00.

My short game's...
You're going to have to reschedule.

Come here.

Take him up.
I got to go check on something.

All right.

You know, Ollie,
just a little while ago

I was telling
Danny and Mike

what an excellent
judge of character I was.

How long ago
did I say that?

Just a little while ago.

Well, I'll tell you how

we happened to be discussing
that particular subject.

We were discussing it because I commented
on how very much I dislike you.

You know, we don't even
know each other...

Mr. Deline...
Shut up.

We don't know each other,

and yet this dislike,
this animosity,

this firm belief
that you're a complete jerk

was almost instantaneous.

Look at this.
You've proven me right.

It's a gift, Mr. D.

Do I get to say anything?

After I tell you
what's going to happen.

I'm going to give you
one more chance. Just one.

Say thank you.

From this moment forward,

you will not even so much
as think of another woman.

You will be the kindest,

most generous,
most adoring husband in the world.

Now, if I should hear
otherwise...

You don't want that.

A man, a large man,
will visit you at your home.

He will not knock... You kind
of understand what I'm saying here?

Fine.

All right,
so what do you have to say for yourself?

Mr. Deline,
you don't have to worry.

This will never happen again.

I adore Nicole.
She is the love of my life.

This... It only happened
because I was really drunk.

And I decided to go down to
the casino after Nicole went to bed,

and I got even more drunk.

And then when I was in the
elevator going back up to the room,

this woman gets on and
she pretty much attacked me.

Now, I know that's not
an excuse for what happened,

but I think that most guys would have
done the same thing in the same situation.

Then why didn't you get off
and go back to your own room?

Why did you ride back down
with her and leave the casino?

She was wearing a lot of perfume,
like a stripper.

So I thought if I went outside
and walked around, it would wear off.

You're familiar with
the fragrance of strippers?

Look, that's what happened.

You either believe me
or you don't.

But I don't have
to put up with this.

Paying for our room

doesn't give you the right
to interrogate or threaten me.

Remember what I said.

(DOOR CLOSlNG)

Keep watching him.
On and off property.

Off property?
You mean tail him 24 hours a day?

No, of course not.

You and Danny split it up.

Hey.
Hey.

Where are you going?
To plant a homing device on Ollie.

He says the woman
in the elevator

was making all the moves
and he won't do it again,

but Ed's not buying it.

I do.

I looked at
the surveillance tapes again.

Yeah?

I did some checking

and I think that that girl
in the elevator's Pomona.

Who's Pomona?

A stripper at the Hippo.
And a major-league scammer.

Oh, yeah. Ollie said she was
wearing that stripper-type perfume.

Well, I've had
a few run-ins with her.

She once offered me
a three-way if I let her go.

Huh. What did you do?

Danny?

This is such
a huge waste of time.

Even if he did make
the moves with Pomona,

we're not
marriage counselors.

I hate to say it,
but I agree with you.

And if Nicole married a douchebag,
maybe she deserved it.

(CELL PHONE RlNGlNG) Wow.
My man's been drinking some Hater-ade.

This is Danny.

Yeah. Uh-huh.
I understand.

(WHlSPERlNG)
It's white Steve.

Yeah, he seemed a little
upset when we talked to him, too.

Okay, I'll see
what I can do.

Steve says Steve's acting
a little psycho.

How so?

White Steve's
moving out tonight

and asked if we would
sign off on their upgrade

so he can get back his half
of the security deposit.

Well, maybe I'll go out
there with Delinda later.

Well, go ahead.
I'll take care of this.

Are you sure?
Yeah.

Thank you.

(SlGHS)

So, we have to keep
watching Ollie.

Frankly, I think your
dad's gone a little overboard.

You haven't asked me
about my lunch with Nicole.

Well, would you be offended
if I said I wasn't that interested?

So, how was your lunch
with Nicole?

Nice.
Good.

One interesting thing
came up though.

She said that you two
were quite an item for a while.

Hardly an item.

Right.
So it was just the sex?

We went out a few times
and that was more than enough.

But when you knew
that she was coming back here

and that she and l
were friends

and that you two
had slept together

and that now
we're living together,

you didn't think that was
a coincidence worth mentioning?

You want me to tell you about
every girl that I've had sex with?

You say that
like there were hundreds.

(SlRENS WAlLlNG)

Isn't that where we turn?

Oh, my God!

(SHOUTlNG)

Yes. I burned it down
and I'm glad I did.

Maybe now Steve
will realize

eternal love cannot be
erased with a plane ticket.

I understand. Okay.
I'll talk to you later.

MARY: Well...
Bye.

The phrase "completely and
totally screwed" springs to mind.

Not necessarily.
I spoke with the insurance agent

and once you fill out all the
paperwork and they verify everything,

and the arson charges
are finalized,

they'll come up
with a reimbursement schedule.

You lost me at paperwork.

They're probably going
to nickel-and-dime us.

Not to mention the hassle
of getting a place designed,

building permits,
construction...

Hey, well, I suppose we could
try to negotiate for a cash settlement.

Settle for lot value.

Cash? No rebuilding?

I'm in.

Hands in the middle.
Come on.

Settlement on three.
One, two, three. Settlement!

Hey. Hey.

We put our hands in.

Yeah, yeah!

(CHATTERlNG)

Hey, guys.
Hey.

Danny, why didn't you tell me
you and Delinda were living together?

Sometimes he keeps
things to himself.

Well, I already told her
how great I think it is.

And I would love it if we could
all get together for drinks later.

You know, you guys
and me and Ollie.

I have some stuff to do.

Maybe later?

Oh, yeah, no,
it would have to be later

because Ollie's playing golf,
and I'm going to run to the spa.

Well, then
we'll get back to you.

Good.

Not.

You don't have to pretend
you don't like her.

I'm not pretending.

You don't understand,
that woman is completely nuts.

Should I come back?

No, we're fine.

Did Nicole just say
Ollie was playing golf?

Yeah.

Well, unless there's
a fairway on the l-15

and his golf cart
is doing 65, he lying.

Now he's in Henderson.

Maybe he's playing some golf
out at Black Mountain.

Denise, punch up
the coordinates

and give me
the satellite image, please.

2447 Orchard Avenue.

The owner's listed
as a Felix T. Katt.

I think we should
head out there.

Look, you already admitted
that this is a waste of time.

It may be
a waste of time, Danny,

but a good surveillance man
gives his all on every job.

Good luck.

Hey, guys. Hi.

Hi.
I'm Sam.

I came to take you
to your little get-together.

Mary said to meet her
in the suite.

Oh. Yeah, well,
there's been a little change of plans.

Does Mary know?

She'll figure it out.
Follow me.

(MUTTERlNG)

Your car looks good.

Yeah. They did a nice job.

So, what was all that

"don't pretend you don't
like her" stuff with Delinda?

She just found out about that thing
that Nicole and l had a few years ago.

Actually, Nicole told her.
Do you believe that?

Wait a minute,
you and Nicole?

Yeah. I didn't tell you
about that?

No, my brother,
you did not.

Yeah. It was just
a few months

after she started working
in the coffee shop.

She looks like
she'd be kind of feisty.

Very feisty.

Oh!
Very feisty.

Yeah, but she's a liar
and she's bad news.

Oh! She broke your heart, huh?

She did not break my heart.
I didn't tell you about this?

No.

Okay, she tells me
she's pregnant

and that she thinks maybe we
should think about getting married.

So, you know,
naturally I'm freaking out,

especially because I didn't
think that she was pregnant,

and I always
glove up, so,

you know, I said maybe we
should come up with some other plan.

And sure enough,
she takes another test

and what do you know,
not pregnant.

Well, maybe her first test
was false positive. That can happen.

No, I'm telling you, dude,
this girl's bad news.

(TRACKlNG DEVlCE BEEPlNG)

Bad news.

Hey, Ollie just
left Henderson.

You think we should follow him
or see where he was?

No, we can always find him.

Let's see what's doing at the Felix T.
Katt residence.

What a surprise.

Hi, Danny.
You know each other?

Mike, meet Pomona.

I swear.
I'm not scamming anyone.

I met him at the Montecito,

(PHONE RlNGlNG) and we
just had a little bit of fun.

ANSWERING MACHINE:
Hi, this is Crystal.

If you want to party with me,
just leave your name...

I didn't even know
he was married.

And he said his name was George,
not Ollie.

He said he wanted to see me again,
so I gave him my number.

Hmm.
He just came by to see you?

Yes.
You or Crystal?

Look, I don't know who
this guy is or what he's done,

but he's definitely
not worth all this trouble.

So, if we could just sort
of consider this case closed,

I'd really be grateful.

Like, so grateful.

Not only is the guy cheating,
he's cheating on her with a prostitute.

Is that better or worse?

Come on, man.
You don't feel for Nicole at all?

Her husband's talking about
how much he loves and adores her,

and six hours after
they arrive in Las Vegas,

he's hooking up with a pro.

Yeah, but not
a bad-looking pro, right?

As pros go, maybe.

So, if you had
been there by yourself,

you think you would have
sampled some of that gratitude?

Come on, Danny,
I thought you knew me better.

Mike Cannon doesn't go where
the multitudes have gone before.

Yeah, since when?

ED: Yeah?

So, he just left his broad
he swore he'd never see again?

Honey, do me a favor.
Find that Ollie Querim, would you?

Mmm-hmm.

Listen, hey, Danny,
when you get back,

stay in the car in case this bum
tries to leave. Mike will go with me.

I found him.

I mean cheating is one thing.
Lying to me, that's another.

Denise says he's here in
the sports book. There he is.

Yo! Hey, Ollie.

(OLLlE EXCLAlMS)

I've been looking all over for you.
We need to talk privately.

About Pomona?

Yes. She's blackmailing me.

You know you lied to me once. If
you think you're going to do it again...

I swear. I'm not lying.

So, after that little slip-up
in the elevator,

Pomona calls and says
she knows I'm married

and if I don't pay her $100,000,
she will tell Nicole.

So, after a couple of pecks
on the cheek, she's blackmailing you.

She says that she's going
to tell Nicole that we did more.

Which of course
you did not do.

And she says
that she knows someone

in the Montecito
surveillance department

and she could get the video
from the elevator.

Why didn't
you call the police?

Well, because then they'd
want to know how I knew her.

And you'd have to show
them the surveillance tape.

And I don't want Nicole
to know about this.

I was wrong!

But I assume that you
have a girlfriend or a wife.

You understand.

So, if she's blackmailing you,

what the hell were you
doing at her house an hour ago?

Yeah, yeah,
we do know about that.

I was delivering
half of the money.

I cleaned out
our bank account.

You don't believe me?
Here's a withdrawal slip.

Call the bank.
Check my account.

So, what do you want
from us?

A loan.

Hmm?

For the other 50,000.

(SNlCKERS)

I will pay you back.
I swear. But please,

she only gave me
until noon tomorrow.

I got a question.

Why would we be inclined
to help you?

Because you know
how special Nicole is

and how desperate I am
not to lose her.

She's special.
Yes.

Oh! Oh!

Hey, hey.

I think you're lying.

Go with me.

I'll wear a wire.
You'll see I'm telling the truth.

Please.

Okay, look.
I'm going to do you a favor.

I'm going to think about it.

I'm really sorry about
this whole misunderstanding.

They were supposed to
be here 20 minutes ago.

Don't worry about it.
Ollie's late, too.

One second.
Okay.

(PHONE RINGING)

Hey, Damian, it's Mary.

I just wanted to make sure we're
still on for our little get-together?

Oh, you're in
Mr. Slocum's suite?

I thought you knew.

Sam said...
I can imagine what Sam said.

May I speak with Sam?

Okay.

Sam, it's Mary.

Uh... I'll call her back.

She'll have to call you back.

Sure she will.

Slight change of plans.

We are gonna go meet OK Go
in a different suite.

Oh.
Yeah. Bring your snacks.

Okay.
Come on.

MlKE: He could be using
the blackmail as an excuse

so that if we told Nicole,

he could say it was
all a setup by Pomona.

Or by you,
since you hate him.

I don't hate him.

I mean, I dislike him and
I think Nicole deserves better.

So, maybe, you know,
it's an intense dislike.

Mmm.

So, what about this Pomona?

Does someone in surveillance
really know her?

I do.

Oh, what a shocker.

I busted her last year.
That's how I know her.

Anyway,
is she the kind of person

that would
pull this thing off?

Yeah. Yeah, she is.

Damn it.

Well, I guess before
I break up their marriage,

we'll check it out, huh?

(lNDlSTlNCT CHATTERlNG)

Whoo!

Oh, hey, Mary. Hi, Nicole.

Hey, fellas.

Hey.
SAM: Hey, Mary.

You remember Mr. Slocum?

DAMlAN: It's like five, six,
seven, eight...

SAM: That's my favorite thing.

See that?
It's not as easy as it looks.

Oh, it isn't?
Hi, Nicole.

You're an OK Go fan, right?

Are you kidding?
I'm completely obsessed with you guys.

Come down here. These boys
are going to show you how to do this.

Seriously?
Come on down.

Yeah, come on, Nicole.
Lace up your skates.

(EXCLAlMS)

Could you? Sorry.
No.

Okay.

This isn't over.

Hey, can I talk to you
for a sec?

Sure. Yeah.

You know,
I've been meaning to buy

one of those little $8 packets
of aspirin in the gift shop.

Meet you in the car.

Where are you guys going?

To talk to a stripper who
made out with Ollie in the elevator

who may or may not
be blackmailing him.

Oh. Listen,
I owe you an apology.

Apology accepted. For what?

I shouldn't have been
so bent out of shape

about you keeping
the Nicole thing to yourself.

It's all right.

I mean, I haven't told you
about every sexual liaison I've had.

And I don't need to know.

That's true.

But wouldn't it make our relationship
stronger if you did know?

And I knew about yours?

This is a list of every guy
I've had sex with,

or if I don't remember his name,
location and approximate date.

When you complete your list,
we'll swap.

I think that's
a really bad idea.

But if that's
what you want...

You realize I am going to
get a severe case of writer's cramp?

No great rush.
We'll exchange next weekend, yeah?

Okay.

Okay. Oh, oh, oh, oh,
and I have an idea, too.

You know how we've
been talking about moving?

Yeah.
Why don't we

buy out Sam and Mike and Mary's
shares of the burned down house?

That way, we can build
a house exactly the way we want.

Our dream house.
I think so.

I like it.
And I love you.

I love you, too.

Oh, uh...
Okay.

(CHUCKLlNG) Yeah.

Hey, Pomona's working
at the Hippo tonight

so we can pay her a visit.
Just give me a minute here.

(SlGHS)
What's that?

I'm writing out a list of
all the girls that I've been with.

Delinda seems to think that
it will strengthen our relationship.

Son, I think it's time
you and I have a talk.

I know it's stupid, but for
whatever reason I agreed to do it, so...

(MUMBLES)

There. Done.

That's it?

Yeah.
Nice move.

What are you talking about?

Come on, that low-balling? With a
list that small, she might even top you.

Almost makes you
look innocent.

I got no hidden agenda.
That's the list.

Come on now.
This is Mike you're talking to.

That's the list.

That's the list.
As far as she knows, that's the list.

All right, I can roll with that.
That's the list.

(MEN WHOOPlNG)

(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING)

Hey, you guys
looking for a...

What a surprise.

Let's go.
Okay.

Blackmail? Are you kidding?

I wouldn't last five minutes
in this business

if I ratted out every
married man I'd been with.

If I ratted out one!

So Ollie didn't give you
any money?

Okay.
Ah.

He gave me $1,800
to get my car fixed.

Oh, so that's what they're
calling it now? Getting your car fixed?

(BOTH SNlCKERlNG)

Look, if I really wanted
to blackmail someone,

why would I give
my real name, huh?

MlKE: I don't know.

Why would I let him know
where I live?

Woman's got a point.

Really.

I've seen it a million times.

The guy starts to feel guilty so
he cooks up some story to cover his ass.

Okay. He's lying.

Let's tell Ed so we can
get back to our real jobs.

Remember the multitudes
have been there.

That was the old Mike.

New Mike's seen the light.

That a boy.

So, here's the bottom line.

We think you're lying.

So I don't think you went out
to that stripper's house

to pay ransom.

You went out there voluntarily
to get laid.

So, either you tell
Nicole about this

and try to save
your sorry ass,

which, by the way,
you know, good luck...

Or I'm gonna tell her.
So you got 24 hours.

Nicole always talked about

how compassionate
and understanding you were.

So I thought
you might want to help.

But she was obviously
talking about someone else.

Ooh, ouch. That hurt.

Now, you get the hell
out of my office.

So, basically,
since Dee and l were thinking about

buying a house anyway,

we thought maybe
we'd just build one here.

Assuming none of you object.

How much money would we get?

We have to sign
all these papers.

We just signed
a bunch of papers.

(GROANS)
I give up. They win.

How much money would we get
from you and Delinda?

Mike's been talking
to the insurance guy...

And a few realtors to get
an estimate of the lot value.

I added lot value
to the settlement

the insurance company
offered us...

How much money?

And I figured
each of our shares

would be worth
about 80,000.

That's 30 grand more
than we paid.

Right. So, instead
of getting money

from the insurance company
and from selling the lot...

Which could take a while.

We could just pay each of
you now and we'd own the property.

I'm down with that.

Thank you.
Yeah. I guess that's cool.

All right.

Bring it in.
I'm just kidding.

That went well.

It's a great deal for them.
They get their money back right away.

Speaking of money,
I think you might be right about Nicole.

What do you mean?

She might be a more shallow
person than I thought.

I guess Ollie's business
isn't doing so great,

and twice now she's told
me that having less money

and having to cut back
is ruining her life.

She even said she might divorce him.
He's no prize, but...

When did she say this?

Right when she got here.

A strong marriage needs to
be able to weather the rough patches.

I'll see you at home.

Hey, you finish
your sex list yet?

Delinda tell you everything?

Want some advice?
No.

Between four and seven, that's what
she wants to see. And no one she knows.

Oops, I forgot
about Nicole.

So she told you
about that, too?

It's not exactly
a state secret.

She's not that hot, by the way.
Let me know how it goes.

Yeah. Okay...
Oh...

You don't have to.
I'll find out.

Denise, I want you to
VideolQ Nicole Querim

and call me
as soon as she's alone.

Oh, she just called
looking for you.

She left her cell number.

Okay. Tell her to meet me
at Wolfgang Puck's in an hour.

Hey, Mike, you got any more
of those little homing chips?

Yeah. Why?

Did I ever tell you that
I'm an excellent judge of character?

(ALARM BEEPS)

Hey, Nicole.

Hey. Thanks for meeting me.

Of course.
Listen.

I just wanted to apologize for
mentioning to Delinda our little fling.

No, no, it was really uncool of me.

I should have
realized that...

No, don't worry about it.
It's not a problem.

Really?
Yeah. Really.

So, we're still friends?

Yes. Of course.

Okay.

I don't think
I slept a wink.

Was I snoring again?

No.

I just kept thinking
about all the things

I've always wanted
in a house,

and how now that we're building our own,
I get to have them.

Thank you for doing this.

Oh, what kind of things?

Well, like,
his and hers bathrooms,

a center island kitchen with a bread
warmer, wine cooler, walk-in pantry...

We don't cook.

And, of course,
his and hers closets.

Hers being four times the
size of the one we have now.

And I want a bidet.

Bidet?

What about what I want?

We'll do what you want, too.

You know, as long as it's not
one of those tacky home theater rooms

with a wet bar
and hideous recliners.

That I'd have to veto.

You know, honey,
I think that it would be great

if we could both have everything
we wanted, but, you know,

extra bathrooms
and bread warmers

and huge closets
aren't just expensive,

but they also take up
a lot of space.

Space that we're probably
not going to have.

You want a home theater?

I think a home theater
would be a good use

of an already existing
second bedroom.

Who says we need
a second bedroom?

First of all,
I don't think

a 60-inch LCD with surround
sound is a home theater.

These days,
that's just a television.

Baby, I'm not trying
to be unreasonable.

But you are being
unreasonable.

Okay, how about this?

You lose the home theater
and I'll lose the bidet?

Yeah, but you can watch
your Hugh Grant movies.

You can wash your feet
in the bidet.

I'm starting to think

that this whole home building
thing wasn't such a great idea.

It only cost me 20 bucks.

What are you talking about?

That's what I paid Jerry,
the valet, to clean up my car.

So that little practical joke
you played on me

only cost me $20.

Bargain.

Well, I had to do it.
Otherwise, Slocum was threatening to

take his $500,000-a-weekend
gambling habit to the Venetian.

Anyway, Nicole
got to see OK Go,

so all's well
that ends well.

Is the one who knows they're
doing something wrong but doesn't care

a sociopath
or a psychopath?

Hey, guys,
thanks for coming up.

SAM: Hey.
Hey.

I know that we
told you yesterday

that we wanted to buy back
your shares of the house.

Yeah.
Mmm-hmm!

Yeah. We've been
thinking about it and...

We've changed our minds.

Huh?
That's pretty weak.

Weak? Weak how?
How is that?

It hasn't even been 24 hours.
Nothing's happened.

Yes. Yes,
something has happened.

We all made a deal,
remember?

And now you guys
are backing out.

Which is unethical.

She would know.

Yeah. What if I already
committed that 80 grand

I was supposed to get
right away to something else?

BOTH: Did you?
I may have.

You know,
that's not that point.

The point is we made a deal.
I felt like we were helping you out.

Hey, I checked
that second homing device

and Nicole
is driving south alone.

What did I miss?

I don't think it's unethical to
change our minds after one day, do you?

We didn't even set a time
for payoff to you guys.

I think you said something
about the next couple of days, but...

You don't understand.

Building this house would
have been the end of Delinda and me.

She has a phobia
about recliners.

I'm going to have to do
something about that.

You want me
to answer the question?

Yeah.

Well, to be honest, I don't find
it unethical, just a little cavalier.

What do you mean cavalier?

Well, did you ask if any
of us had made plans for that money?

Mary was already talking about
getting a new car, so...

(CHUCKLlNG)
Well, that's not really...

Wait, wait, wait.
Nicole's in Henderson. At the Hippo.

Maybe she found out and is
going out there to confront her.

No. If I know Nicole,
that ain't it.

One for me. One for you.

One for me.

(WOMEN WHOOPlNG)

(WOMEN LAUGHlNG)

Danny.
Hey.

This isn't
what it looks like.

(STAMMERlNG)
Yeah. It's something else.

Ollie told me everything

and so I came out here to
tell Pomona and get the money back.

Yeah.
Why not call the cops?

Because I thought the money
might become evidence

and it would take a long time
to get it back.

Okay.

Well, now that
you got the money...

You are going to
give the money back, right?

Every penny.
Good.

Then I'll call the cops

and you can tell them
that Pomona blackmailed Ollie

and you knew nothing
until Ollie told you.

Yeah. That way you can help send
Pomona to prison for a very long time.

Okay.

You lying bitch!

Pomona, shut up!
Just shut up!

It was all her idea!
She did it!

Listen, Danny,
we were going to get a divorce!

Stop! Stop!

He would have had to pay
me at least this much in alimony.

Unless he was broke.

Probably didn't want
to take the chance.

We should probably
call the cops now. Mmm-hmm.

Pomona, why don't we finish
that lap dance?

(SlNGlNG) So you were
born in an electrical storm

Took a bite out of the sun

Saw your future
in the meshing of the two

Now your rays
make me kind of go crazy

Shock and awe and amaze me

Just a ticker tape parade
and me but something was wrong

DELlNDA: She tried
to blackmail her own husband?

Yeah.

Hey, I've been thinking,

and I've decided that
we can't go back on our word.

We have to buy the
other shares of the house.

What about
our design issues?

What if you choose the inside
and I choose the outside?

I decorate
the entire interior?

Yes.

Yes, we forget
about the sex list.

Huh?
Deal.

And don't worry,
since I'm eighty-sixing the recliners,

maybe I'll put a flat screen
in the bedroom

so we can watch
our home videos.

Any thoughts on the outside?

As a matter of fact, yes.

A log cabin in the desert?

Let this be a lesson to you.

What lesson
would that be, sir?

How often am I right
about people?

It's pretty much a constant.

99.9% of the time.

But, I mean,
as good as I am,

there's always that one time out
of a thousand when you're a little off.

That's what happened
with Nicole.

Begging your pardon, sir.

I'm still a little unclear
about the lesson part.

The lesson

is don't lose
your humility.

Ah.

Where is Nicole?

Metro Police really didn't
want to furlough her to see the concert

so Mary went
with Ollie instead.

That guy's a jerk.

Come on, Eddie,
he's a victim.

Hey, if he hadn't
allowed himself

to make out
in that elevator,

none of this
would have happened.

The guy is a jerk.

(SAM LAUGHlNG)

Hey! I love it.

(WHlSTLlNG)

Come on, come on,
come on, come on, come on, come on

Mr. Slocum thinks we
should kiss and make up.

(SCOFFS)

D-d-d-do what you want!

D-d-d-do what you want!

Yeah!

Do what you want!
Do, do what you want!

Do, do what you want!

Do what you want!

D-d-d-do what you want!

Come on!

Come on! Come on! Come on!

D-d-d-d-d-do what you want!

Yeah!

(ALL CHEERlNG)

(WHOOPS)