Knight Squad (2018–…): Season 1, Episode 10 - Wish I May, Wish I Knight - full transcript

Looking good, students.

Ciara, let's see if
you can demonstrate

a double-arrow shot.

She double-can.

I don't know if
that makes sense,

but I'm rooting for you.

Thanks.

Here goes nothing.

Hey!

I can't afford to
lose any more eyes.

That's awesome...



If you're trying to get worse.

Congratulations on your decline.

Students, put your weapons away.

You can mark the hour
on your own time.

Hey, are you okay?

I mean, archery is
usually your thing...

Kind of how like not playing
the ukulele is my thing.

It's just so tiny.

I haven't had enough
time to practice

because of all my
princess duties.

Yeah, but you got to
judge that bake-off.

Free pie, blue ribbons.

Get out of my dreams, lady.

If this keeps up,



I'll never get good enough
to become a knight.

I'm not even good enough

to fight an army of balloons.

Don't get down, all right?

Your life is complicated,

but you always
find the answer...

Usually with my help,
after some shenanigans.

Students!

You've all been working so hard

that you deserve a treat.

So, I'm taking you on a quest

to find treasure at the
Treasure Trove Caverns.

- Yeah!
- Yay!

Aw. I can't go.

Now I have princess stuff to do.

My life would just
be so much easier

if my dad would let me
go to knight school.

And I wouldn't
have to constantly

make up excuses to
cover for you...

Like this one.

Sir Gareth, Ciara just got stung

by a red-nosed scorpion.

Ow!

Ow! Stupid red-nosed scorpion.

Oooh... its bite makes your butt

swell up to the size
of a beach ball.

That's my third-
favorite animal.

Her first is a baby otter.

But she doesn't like
people to know that.

I'm sorry, Ciara,

but you're going to
have to miss the quest

and get to the nurse's shack.

- Ahhh...
- Run!

Well, don't literally run.

The scorpion's venom will move
faster through your body.

Well, go faster than that!

You just got stung
by a scorpion!

Isn't this great, Princess,

connecting to our people

through the power of waves.

I love the King and
Princess Waving Hour,

but we could do it
in half the time,

of we switched to double waving.

Why are you in such a hurry?

I just think there are
more important things

a princess could be
doing for the kingdom.

Oh, the people enjoy
it as much as we do,

and we can scan the courtyard

for new food carts.

Those look delicious!

Guard, find the cart that
makes those lamb chops.

What I'm trying to say is

you should let me go
to knight school.

Oh, you know the answer is no.

And here's a "no" for the
next six times you ask.

No, no, no, no, no, no!

Would it change your
mind if you knew

I was the greatest
warrior in Astoria?

I refuse to have this
conversation again.

Guard, bring me my
crown of silence!

With your sister Eliza away,

you have a responsibility

to the kingdom to stay safe!

This really works! I
can't hear myself!

Ahhhh!

Ahhhh!

Ahhhh!

Ahhhh!

Ah, Your Highness,

we have returned from the
Treasure Trove Caverns.

Who wants to see some treasure?

I do! I do!

All the bling...

that's fit for the king!

Or princess!

Thank you.

Nothing excites me more than
your generous gift of...

Lamp chops!!

Princess, I've got my treasure.
What would you like?

I won't want treasure.

I want to go to
knight school and...

You're wearing the crown
of silence again.

What?!

I can't hear you!

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

Back to your home, Sparkles.

Yes, I'll wear you
tomorrow, Dazzle.

Are you talking to
your tiaras again?

No.

We'll talk more later.

I told you not to use
my secret passage.

You also told me to stop
using your snack catapult.

Pigs in a blanket!

What?

Why are you here?

Because I found this bottle

at the Treasure Trove
Caverns to cheer you up.

Open it! Open it!

It's genie time!

- You're a genie?
- Yeah, she is.

And she is gonna grant
you three wishes.

You bet I am.

First, I'm gonna celebrate
being outta that bottle.

So much space!

I'm stretchin'. I'm kickin'.

Look at me go!

Arc, you found an actual genie.

There haven't been genies
in Astoria for centuries.

Yeah-h-h-h?

I mean, huh-h-h-h-h?

♪ Yeah hey ♪

♪ Oh oh oh oh ♪

♪ Oh oh oh oh oh ♪

♪ Oh oh oh oh ♪

Hey!

♪ Oh oh oh oh oh ♪

♪ Oh oh oh oh ♪

♪ Oh oh ♪
Hey!

♪ Oh, we will be heroes ♪

♪ We are the Knight Squad ♪

♪ Hey! ♪

♪ Na na na na, na na na na ♪

So, you're really here
to grant my wishes?

I grant the wishes of whoever
possesses the bottle.

Again, I feel like I have
to say huh-h-h-h-h-h?

You get three wishes.

But, first, we need to go over

the Genie Wish Rules.

Nothing about wars.

Can't start 'em, can't end 'em.

Nothing about love.

You've gotta figure that
one out for yourself.

You can't wish for more wishes.

I know you were thinking it.

She's right. I was
thinking that.

This is a good genie.

Yeah, she is.

And if you wanna fix your
problem with your dad,

just ask this magical
motor mouth.

Yes, what's the problem
with your dad?

Ooh, if he's a big booger head,

I could literally turn him
into a big booger head.

Oh? No!

My dad's wonderful...

Except he won't let me
go to knight school,

so, I created Ciara,
my secret identity.

Secret identity?

So, you've had other
genies before me?

That's really cool. No bigs.

Oh...

Don't cry.

A pixie gave me a magic ring.

A pixie?

Pfffft! Well, there's
your problem.

If you want your
wish to come true,

don't be a wienie, use a genie!

You heard her. Make
your wish, wienie.

Okay, here goes.

I wish my dad would let
me go to knight school.

Your wish is my command.

Hey, I could also say,
whatever ya wish, dude!

Do you like it? I'm
trying it out.

What about wika-wika,
wish it up!

Just spitballin'.

If you just do it,
he'll stop talking.

Okay.

What just happened?

You're not wearing your ring.

Your wish worked.

- Yep.
- Ahhhh!

Is that how you guys say hello?

It's fun.

Ahhhh!

Anyway, your father now allows
you to go to knight school,

so, yay, me, makin'
dreams come true!

But if I'm allowed to
go to knight school,

why am I still Ciara?

Oh, yeah, your Ciara
hair was just too gorg,

so, I went with the
full Ciara package.

Hey, guys, did you hear
about the new ranking?

Phoenix Squad is on top.

Again.

And we set the record
for most points.

Again.

So, we're ahead of Kraken Squad?

Kraken Squad?

There is no Kraken Squad.

We just have Phoenix,
Unicorn, and Sloth Squad.

No Kraken means no Sage.

Kiki, you are way
better than a pixie.

Aw, thanks.

And you are way better
than a flying cockroach.

That's what I call pixies.

Oh, Ciara, will you demonstrate

a quadruple-arrow shot.

Are you kidding?

That'll be easy for Ciara.

Right. So easy.

Yes, of course.

There is no way I'm
making this shot.

I couldn't even make a double-
arrow shot this morning.

You're going to do great, okay?

In fact, I'm so confident,

I am just gonna hide
behind this shield.

And I am just gonna
hide behind him.

Here goes nothing.

Ah, yes!

Oh, my gosh! I did it!

Did you see that?

Ciara is here every night
practicing after hours

and it paid off.

I'm awesome at knight school,

Sage isn't here, and
my hair looks great.

I love this genie!

Aw, she loves you back.

Are you wearing my spare armor?

Gotta go!

♪ Oh na na ♪

♪ Na na, hey hey hey ♪

I'm feeling generous today.

Students, order all the
onion rings you can eat!

You, uh, sure about that, sir?

Oh, oh, right, yes.

Um, everyone but Prudy.

Dude! I thought you
were my friend.

My Princess!

Have you been at
knight school all day?

Yes. Is that okay?

No, it's not okay.

It's wonderful!

I'm so proud of all the
butt you're kicking.

I never thought I'd
hear him say that.

Huh-h-h-h-h-h?

Huh-h-h-h-h-h?

Thank you for getting
me that genie bottle.

I found it in the Treasure
Trove bathroom while I was...

I don't need to know
all the details!

Would you like to hear the
specials today, Sir Gareth?

Yes.

It's onion rings...
Just like every day.

Why is my dad
behind the counter?

Uh, because he runs
the Tasty Trunk.

- What?
- Yeah.

And he needs the
counter so he can do

his hilarious "walking
down the stairs" bit.

I'll get more onion
rings from the cellar.

There is no cellar.
It never gets old.

But he's the king.

He sure is.

The King of Onion Rings.

All hail, the King of Rings!

All hail, the King of Rings!

Thank you, hungry subjects.

Hey, guys.

Kiki, what's going on?

Oh, I'm out of my bottle

and trying new things.

Right now I'm a sassy waitress.

No, I meant, why is my dad
running a restaurant?

Oh, well, the king would
never allow his daughter

to go to knight school
'cause it's too dangerous.

So, I had to make a
few adjustments.

Wait, you made it so he's not
the King of Astoria anymore?

Then that means I'm not
the princess anymore.

But you said your
princess duties

were getting in the
way of your training.

See? See? People think
genies don't listen.

But we do.

But I wanted to be the
Princess of Astoria

and to go to knight school.

Ohhh...

Yeah, okay, so you really need
to learn to be more specific.

Wait, if you're
not the princess,

then who is?

All hail, Princess Sage!

All hail, Princess Sage!

That's what I said.

♪ Oh oh oh, hey, oh oh oh, hey ♪

Kneel, dummies.

Get down.

So, I'm not the
princess and Sage is.

How could you do this, Kiki?

You sound mad.

Do you mind if I just
pop into my bottle

until you're super-happy again?

Let's stuff a pixie in
there and watch 'em fight.

All right, you've
worshipped me enough.

Stand, dummies.

You lose!

She didn't say "Simon says."

BUTTERCUP & SAGE:

My favorite part of
being a princess

is having a royal bestie jester.

My favorite part of being
a royal bestie jester

is this hat.

It's so jingly.

You, giant girl,
lift this table.

But you put these crystal
pain bands on me

to shock me if I tried to
use my giant strength.

You sure did. You said,
"Anyone stronger

than me will wish they weren't."

Ha!

She sounds just like me.

Now lift it, giant.

Oh, um, Your
Highness, is that...

is that really necessary?

Do you want the
crystal pain bands?

I tried, Prudy.

Okay, I'll lift the table.

Help! Princess!

Ah, it was funny the
first ten times.

Put it down.

- This is terrible.
- I know.

My wish did this and
I have to fix it.

I'm gonna summon Kiki.

Hey, you! Give me that bottle.

It'll look good in my bedroom

next to my collection
of creepy doll heads.

I get to keep their
creepy doll bodies.

No, I'm not giving
you this bottle.

I'll get it, Princess Sage.

Bottle-us, comesy-heresy!

Hey!

Ah. Thank you.

Would you like to go to dinner?

Would you like to
go to the dungeon?

Will they be serving dinner?

Ciara, she's walking
away with the bottle.

I know. What are we gonna do?

If we can't summon Kiki,

Astoria will be stuck
like this forever.

Wait.

Princess Sage said she was
taking it to her room.

I know a guy that can
get us in there.

It's me. I'm the guy.

What did Sage do to my room?

She replaced my teddy
bear with a scary bear!

And look what she did
to my tiara cabinet.

It's a cabinet of nightmares.

Hey, at least she
didn't get rid of

the snack catapult.

Well, now it's a cat catapult.

Arc, focus.

We have to find that
bottle before Sage comes.

I'll see you later, Buttercup.

It's too late! She's here! Hide!

Down, scary bear!

There has to be a reason

why they wanted
this bottle so bad.

What's in here?

Did you guys eat a
bunch of onion rings

and forgive me...

Oh, someone new.

Hi, I'm Kiki.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You're a genie?

Yes, and since you
have the bottle,

I can grant you three wishes.

Co-o-o-o-ol.

I could wish for more wishes.

Ooh, actually, there's a few
rules we should go over.

Don't bother, Kiki!

She doesn't get any wishes.

What are you doing in my room?

Are you here to steal
my doll heads?

No one would steal those.

All right, give us that bottle.

Genie, I wish for you to
have insane fighting skills

and use it against
these two intruders.

Wika-wika, wish it up!

Hey! That's Arc's
super-cool genie phrase.

Sorry, guys. I'm gonna have
to kick your butts now.

Cool! Now I know kung fu.

Just make sure you mess
them up, not my room.

Bye!

Wait! I know Sage
has the bottle.

But you don't have to do this.

Well, you definitely don't
have to do it this well.

♪ Oh oh oh, oh oh oh, hey ♪

♪ Na na na na, oh oh ♪

Okay, this is bad.

If we don't get
that bottle back,

we'll be stuck forever

in Princess Sage's
carnival of crazy.

Play one of the best new FPS shooters,
search Steam for PROJECT WARLOCK

Okay, the next time
you find a genie,

find one that's out of shape.

I really wish I could
let you guys go,

but genie rules and all.

Super sorry.

And I'm sorry about this.

Ah!

- Hey, guys!
- Ahhhh!

How did you get down
here so quickly?

Hello? A genie.

Now where were we?

Oh, right.

Way to kick their butts, genie.

What other cool
stuff can you do?

Ooh, I can run in slow motion.

No way! I can dance like a duck.

Ha!

Oh, it's just so good
to be a princess.

Are you guys okay?

Obviously not.

Arc has sad eyes.

Who hurt you, buddy?

She did.

It's a long story, but we
have to stop that genie.

Okay, I'll use my
giant strength.

No. You'll get shocked.

I know. But you're worth it.

Awww... You're a loyal
bestie in any universe.

Oh, I don't know
what that means,

but thank you.

But what about me?
I'll do anything.

You name it.

We need you to use your magic

to get that bottle back
from Princess Sage.

- Oh, no can do.
- What?

Hey, genie, how
about a giant hug?

Ooh, yay. I've always
wanted to try a hug.

Oh! Hugs are not
what I expected!

What are you doing to my genie?

Cannot summon genie magic.

Come on, bro. We need you.

Hey, maybe Princess
Sage will like you

because you're a...

rebel bad boy.

- I'll do it!
- ARC:

Bottle-us, comesy-heresy!

Yes! I've got the bottle!

And I'm a bad boy.

How do ya like me now?

I like you less.

I made a terrible mistake!

Genie, stop them!

You no longer have
the bottle, so, no.

Guards, seize that bottle!

Hurry up! Make a wish!

I wish everything
was back to normal!

Wika-wika, wish it up!

Just do it!

Nothing excites me more than
your generous gift of...

Lamb chops!!

I'm the princess! And
you're the king!

And Sage is just regular
knight school Sage!

Okay.

Hey, show some respect
to the girl I love,

but I'm too scared to talk to.

Oooh!

Look, Sage, I found
a pretty bottle.

No! You cannot have that!

B-Because the princess
probably wants it.

I do. Thank you, random
knight school student.

Well, you know the rules.

Since the king doesn't
want anything, let's...

go throw this in a ditch.

Yes! And I know just the ditch.

Ah! Happy to be back in
your complicated life?

Yes, everything is perfect.

Thank you for teaching me

I can't wish my problems away.

Hey, you still have
one wish left.

Oh, talking alpacas, please!

Actually, I gift my
last wish to you, Kiki.

What?

You're gonna give your last wish

to the bathroom genie?

I'm so sorry. Please,
don't kick me.

I don't need any more wishes.

I wouldn't change a thing.

No way! No way! No way!
No way! No way!

I know exactly what I want.

A slightly bigger bottle.

Ha, ha, there's so
much space in here!

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