King of the Hill (1997–2010): Season 7, Episode 5 - Dances with Dogs - full transcript
Bobby and Hank compete in a dog dancing contest.
Captioning sponsored by
FOX BROADCASTING COMPANY
and TWENTIETH CENTURY FOX
TELEVISION
PEGGY:
Hank!
I found the coupons.
Oh... they've expired.
Dang it.
Aw, heck, I'm really in
the mood for some ice cream.
Let’s just pay
the full price.
Uh, you guys
go on ahead without me.
I'm sticking
to my New Year's resolution...
ice cream once a day.
Attaboy, Bobby.
Nothing tastes sweeter
than self-discipline.
That's right...
go get your ice cream.
♪... Work it on out ♪
♪ Work it on out... ♪
Ladybird?
♪... You know you're twistin',
little girl ♪
♪ Twistin', little girl... ♪
You ready, girl?
♪... twist so fine ♪
♪ Twist so fine ♪
♪ Come on and twist
a little closer, now ♪
♪ Twist a little closer ♪
♪ And let me know
that you're mine ♪
♪ Let me know ou're mine ♪
♪ Shake it, shake it,
shake it, baby, now... ♪
Yeah, Ladybird!
I'm sorry, Peggy.
It’s just that kid...
he stuck his fingers
in the ice cream
and it ruined the mood.
♪... baby... ♪
And we turn.
Whoa!
Bobby, what the hell are
you doing with my dog?
I... it's, uh...
it's extreme training.
Looked like dancing to me.
It was dancing.
It's called
"Musical Canine Freestyle."
Liar.
No, no, no.
Look, it's a real thing.
They have contests,
and everything.
It started
up in Canada.
They're supposed
to be our allies.
Dad, it's okay.
The routine we worked out
is low-impact
and Ladybird loves it.
She's 13 years old.
If I hadn't stopped
you when I did
you could have
displaced her hip.
But we were training for
a contest in McMaynerbury.
No. No more dancing,
or any other Canadian tricks.
She's got arthritis.
Who's got arthritis?
Yes, you do.
Come on, girl,
time for your nap.
I'll turn on the dryer
to help you sleep.
(sighing)
Just when I think
the boy is acting normal
I catch him dancing
with Ladybird.
Ugh! And he had her
wearing a bandanna.
Dog b' man
best friend, man.
Talkin' 'bout no
can't no dress 'em up
like some of them dang ol'
little lady's poodle, man.
Talkin' 'bout
d-d-dang ol' dog, man.
No dignity, man.
No dignity.
Exactly,
Boomhauer.
Pfff! Dancing with
dogs- ridiculous.
Next thing you know
they'll have them smoking.
Hey, that's not a bad idea...
doggie cigarettes.
I thought of it first!
Uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh.
What kind of dance
were they doing, Hank?
Uh, I don't know.
The Twist. Why?
Uh... Bobby
should be severely punished.
What was he thinking?
It's a jackass sport.
(nervous chuckle):
Excuse me.
I have to attend to
a personal matter of
pressing importance.
Bill's so busy
these days.
(sighing)
I'm going to miss
dancing with that dog.
You know, I dance
with the seniors
down at the
nursing home.
Maybe that would
cheer you up.
It would be nice to have
a boy there for a change.
Have you been listening?
I want to dance with dogs,
no told people.
Geez.
Hey.
MAN ON RADIO 1:
When you see him
in person
he is really
a monster.
MAN ON RADIO 2:
Five feet if
he's an inch.
This new planer
really does the trick,
huh, Ladybird?
(changes to slow
western swing music)
Watch it, Ladybird.
Daddy's using the planer.
What is it, Ladybird?
You like that
music, huh, girl?
Ladybird,
you're a beautiful dancer.
I'm looking
to adopt a dog
that could be
a good dancing partner.
One that can really
cut a rug.
I was thinking
maybe a longhair.
I like long hair.
That one there?
Yeah, well,
he looks like he's strong
and he's certainly got
a lot of energy.
Are they a good breed
for dog dancing?
Oh, yeah, they're,
uh, bred for dancing.
Oh! I hope
you like rock 'n roll!
So, you want to
dance with my dog.
But what’s in it
for the big dog... me, Khan?
Uh...
How about
you pick up Doggie's poo
from my yard?
That way, child prodigy Connie
get to study more
poo-picking hillbilly
get to dance with dog.
Universe in harmony.
He's a small dog.
How bad could it be?
Yeah.
Deal.
You start now!
Oh, geez!
What are you
feeding him?!
Just going to, uh, get gas.
♪ I go out walkin'
after midnight ♪
♪ Out in the moonlight,
just like we used to do... ♪
Hey, Peggy, you notice anything
different about Ladybird?
Is the left side of
her face paralyzed?
Nope. She's lost two pounds.
Tapeworm!
That was my second guess.
No. Since I've been,
uh, walking her more
she's been getting
in great shape. Listen.
No creaking joints
and I've stopped
giving her
her anti-inflammatory
medication.
(barks)
Even her bark
sounds more youthful.
It's like she's a puppy again.
You know, I'm going to keep...
walking her.
I don't care
what anybody thinks.
I love you, Peggy.
Hey, Ladybird
remember when you won
this ribbon
for cutest puppy
at the mall?
Huh, do you?
Labor Day?
Remember that, huh,
do you?
Fall of '89...
huh?
Do you remember?
(barks)
Yeah, me, too.
Let's win you another ribbon,
girl.
She's named after former
First Lady Lady Bird Johnson.
So, there is no
limit to the number
of sequins an entrant
can have on his costume?
Can I get that in writing?
Mr. Hill,
you forgot your pen.
Dad?
What are you doing here?
Okay, I know
what this looks like
and it is what it is.
You lied.
You made me think dog dancing
was for weirdos.
Wait a minute,
that's Khan's dog.
You're dancing
with the neighbor's dog
against me and Ladybird?
Well, what was I supposed to do,
not dance with a dog?!
And anyway, you said Ladybird
was too old to dance.
If you pumped her
full of pain pills
I'm make sure you're
both disqualified.
Well, what
do you care?
Looks like
you'll dance
with any dog
that will have you.
Oh, he's not
just any dog.
This little fella may
poo like a buffalo
but he dances like
Britney Spears.
Oh, yeah? Well, I think
this pup's going
to surprise you
with a few moves
of her own.
I believe it's up to the judges
to decide
who's got the moves
and who doesn't.
I'll see you
out on the dance floor.
Fwah!
That’s just a little taste.
Dad. Ladybird.
BOBBY:
Just let us in.
We'll go straight
to my room.
We need to practice.
You're dancing
with the neighbor's dog.
Go dance at the neighbor's.
Come on!
Leave,
or I'll call the pound.
You're scared, old man.
You're scared of my moves!
That's crazy.
Peggy?
Hank, this is
all very simple.
You both want to
dance with dogs.
Right. You each have a
dog you can dance with.
You take your dog
to the garage.
You dance
with her there.
Bobby gets to dance with
his dog in his bedroom.
Everybody gets to
dance with a dog.
Everybody wins.
(country line dance-
title music playing)
You ready to dance, Rex?
Of course you are.
It's in your blood.
♪... You never was my girl... ♪
Okay.
♪... when I'm gone ♪
♪ Oh, you
can tell your friends... ♪
(screaming)
♪... And laugh and joke about me
on the phone... ♪
You want to lead?
Is that it, boy?
♪... Go back into the barn ♪
♪ You can tell my feet
to hit the floor♪
♪ Or you can tell my lips
to tell my fingertips... ♪
(heavy sigh)
(screech)
(screaming)
A costume.
BILL:
Rex, j-just,
just move our paw.
That's...
(screaming)
Now, I know
this isn't our style
but you got to do
what you got to do.
Wow. Ladybird,
I really think
we're going to
win this thing.
Oh, Bill?
Hank, I know you
don't like dog dancing
but I need your advice.
I bought a dog
to dance with.
It won’t dance with me!
It's all my fault.
I'm doing something
to push it away
just like I pushed
away Lenore.
(groaning):
Bill, this isn't a good time.
I-I'm kind of
in the middle of something.
(chuckling):
Aw!
Doesn't Ladybird
look cute in that hat?
(gasping)
Hank.
You're dog dancing!
Look, you cannot tell Dale
or Boomhauer about this, okay?
They wouldn't understand.
No, of course
they wouldn't;
they're idiots.
Oh, isn't dog dancing
wonderful, Hank?
Yes.
What am I doing to make
the dog hate me, Hank?
Why? Why am I
so repulsive?
You're not repulsive,
Bill. Maybe...
Yes?
Maybe it's the song
you picked out.
The song, yes,
the song!
What about the song?
Let your dog
help choose the song.
Just don't let him
pick something
like "Doggie in the Window"
or"Hound Dog."
It's too obvious.
Wait, why am I
telling you this?
You're not entering
the competition, are you?
Well, yeah,
I thought...
Get out.
Mm-mm.
This is good.
Nice and salty.
I said the funniest thing today.
Well, I almost did...
Are you going to finish
that gristle?
Yes, as a matter
of fact, I am.
But you never eat
your gristle.
You always give it
to Ladybird.
(gobbling)
Spit it out.
You don't even like gristle.
But I do like the taste
of you not getting it.
Hank, Bobby, stop it.
No ribbon is more important
than your family.
For God's sake,
you are fighting over fat.
Yeah, you're right,
you're right.
Uh, let me make it up
to both of you.
Peggy, let's go out dancing
like we usually do
and let Bobby and Doggie
have the house to practice.
Alone.
But you have to lock
Ladybird in the garage.
Of course.
Oh, it is certainly nice
to get out of the house.
It's been so tense with all
the arguing and barking.
I'm glad you're having fun,
'cause you deserve it.
Oh! Hank...
You are dip-crazy
tonight.
Yup, yup.
So, uh, since
you brought it up
do you know if Bobby does
any dips in his routine?
Or any other moves
you've noticed.
Are you pumping me
for information?
How much backwards
walking are they doing?
A little, average or a lot?
Hank, I am trying really hard
to remain neutral here.
I thought you wanted
to dance with me.
I do, I do, you're right.
It’s just you and me, Ladybird.
What?!
You just blew it, mister.
Fine. You know what?
I hope Bobby wins.
What?
Oh, sure, go home to Bobby
and the neighbor's dog.
While you're at it
why don't you just move in
with Kahn and Mihn?
You can eat rice all day
and never celebrate Christmas.
Good luck, Hank.
It's got nothing
to do with luck, Peggy.
We're going to win this thing.
You're making a big mistake.
Ladybird hates you.
What do they see
in that yappy little rat?
We can win this thing
without them. Right, Ladybird?
You look great in that outfit,
by the way.
On the count of three,
everyone say "bones."
One, two...
Don't, don't move,
it’s just the red eye.
♪ Bones. ♪
Wow, these dogs are
dressed to the nines.
It's like they're going
to dance at the White House.
Don’t worry, Ladybird,
we're going to win this thing.
Remember,
it's not just about pageantry
it's about a man
and his dog dancing together.
That's what the people
came to see
and that's what
we're going to give them.
It's our trump card.
That's what we've got over
all these nut jobs, right, girl?
(whimpering)
Come on, Rex. Settle down.
We're going to be late
for the competition.
(barking)
(frightened yelping)
(sniffing)
(barking)
(humming)
(muffled bark)
Oh, he's dreaming.
ANNOUNCER:
Let's have another
big round of applause
for Pam Taylor and her
Irish setter, Sparkles.
Sparkles?
More like Fizzles.
Still leaving
the dance area.
I'm Dud Jeperson
along with Sketch Randall
and we’re just so gosh darn
happy to be here.
And they're off
the dance floor.
Next up is Hank Hill
and his purebred
bloodhound, Ladybird.
Are you ready
to see more dancing?
(polite clapping)
Okay, pup, this is it.
Uh, I just wanted
to, uh, apologize
for what Ladybird
and I are about to do.
Win.
(Pats Cline's "Walking
After Midnight"plays)
♪ I go out walking ♪
♪ After midnight ♪
♪ Out in the moonlight... ♪
Well hello to you, too,
Hank Hill.
SKETCH:
And what poise and mobility
from that bloodhound.
The feet, the hand
the tail, all moving
as one unit.
No wonder this proud bitch
was named after
our former First Lady.
(awning)
(chuckling)
Bill Dauterive and Rex,
you're on deck.
And uh, oh,
no muzzles.
Yeah, but I...
No muzzles.
Those are the rules.
Okay.
♪... somewhere a walkin' ♪
♪ After midnight ♪
♪ Searching for me. ♪
Way to go, girl.
It's not too late
for you and Doggie
to turn tail.
(chuckling)
Take some notes,
because this is how
people are going to be
dog dancing from now on.
Next up, Bobby Hill and
his mixed terrier, Doggie.
(Techtronic's
"Move This"plays)
♪ Yo, come on, move this ♪
♪ Shake that body ♪
♪ Shake that body ♪
♪ Shake that body ♪
♪ Shake that body ♪
We are witnessing
a dream.
I hope I never wake up
and this dance lasts forever.
A boy, a dog, a dance.
♪... many different flavors ♪
♪ And the spice is strong ♪
♪ Get into the hot stuff,
let me pour a little song... ♪
DUD:
Are they even
touching the floor?
Amazing.
♪ You've got to move this... ♪
Boy, the alley's
dead today.
♪ Baby let me show you
how to do this ♪
♪ You've got to move this ♪
♪ You're doing fine ♪
♪ Pump it, pump it,
pump, pump it up ♪
♪ Nothing
can make this one stop ♪
♪ You've got to move this... ♪
DUD:
I don't even know how
to describe that move.
SKETCH:
I wish everyone
who denies
the pure athleticism
of dog dancing
could see what I'm
seeing right now.
(applauding)
It's okay, Ladybird.
All flash, no substance.
And the third prize
for Beginners Off-Leash
Musical Freestyle goes to...
Rhonda Clark and her
Border Collie, Rusty.
Second prize
goes to...
Bobby Hill
and his neighbor's
dog, Doggie.
Oh!
And first prize
goes to...
This is it, girl.
Helen Bradley and her
toy poodle, Buddy.
Well, we did our best, girl.
It's a young dog's sport.
Come on, let's go home.
Time for your nap.
You want
to watch me paint, girl?
It's semi-gloss.
(radio plays
"Walking After Midnight")
No, Ladybird, that's not for us.
Oh, how can I say no
to that face?
♪ Maybe he's cryin' for me ♪
♪ And as the skies turn gloomy ♪
Care to cut in, son?
There's someone else
I owe this dance to.
♪... as Lonesome as I can be ♪
Ma'am.
Now, where were we?
♪... after midnight ♪
♪ Out in the starlight... ♪
Captioned by
Media Access Group at WGBH
access. Wgbh. Org
SKETCH:
Just move our paw.
FOX BROADCASTING COMPANY
and TWENTIETH CENTURY FOX
TELEVISION
PEGGY:
Hank!
I found the coupons.
Oh... they've expired.
Dang it.
Aw, heck, I'm really in
the mood for some ice cream.
Let’s just pay
the full price.
Uh, you guys
go on ahead without me.
I'm sticking
to my New Year's resolution...
ice cream once a day.
Attaboy, Bobby.
Nothing tastes sweeter
than self-discipline.
That's right...
go get your ice cream.
♪... Work it on out ♪
♪ Work it on out... ♪
Ladybird?
♪... You know you're twistin',
little girl ♪
♪ Twistin', little girl... ♪
You ready, girl?
♪... twist so fine ♪
♪ Twist so fine ♪
♪ Come on and twist
a little closer, now ♪
♪ Twist a little closer ♪
♪ And let me know
that you're mine ♪
♪ Let me know ou're mine ♪
♪ Shake it, shake it,
shake it, baby, now... ♪
Yeah, Ladybird!
I'm sorry, Peggy.
It’s just that kid...
he stuck his fingers
in the ice cream
and it ruined the mood.
♪... baby... ♪
And we turn.
Whoa!
Bobby, what the hell are
you doing with my dog?
I... it's, uh...
it's extreme training.
Looked like dancing to me.
It was dancing.
It's called
"Musical Canine Freestyle."
Liar.
No, no, no.
Look, it's a real thing.
They have contests,
and everything.
It started
up in Canada.
They're supposed
to be our allies.
Dad, it's okay.
The routine we worked out
is low-impact
and Ladybird loves it.
She's 13 years old.
If I hadn't stopped
you when I did
you could have
displaced her hip.
But we were training for
a contest in McMaynerbury.
No. No more dancing,
or any other Canadian tricks.
She's got arthritis.
Who's got arthritis?
Yes, you do.
Come on, girl,
time for your nap.
I'll turn on the dryer
to help you sleep.
(sighing)
Just when I think
the boy is acting normal
I catch him dancing
with Ladybird.
Ugh! And he had her
wearing a bandanna.
Dog b' man
best friend, man.
Talkin' 'bout no
can't no dress 'em up
like some of them dang ol'
little lady's poodle, man.
Talkin' 'bout
d-d-dang ol' dog, man.
No dignity, man.
No dignity.
Exactly,
Boomhauer.
Pfff! Dancing with
dogs- ridiculous.
Next thing you know
they'll have them smoking.
Hey, that's not a bad idea...
doggie cigarettes.
I thought of it first!
Uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh.
What kind of dance
were they doing, Hank?
Uh, I don't know.
The Twist. Why?
Uh... Bobby
should be severely punished.
What was he thinking?
It's a jackass sport.
(nervous chuckle):
Excuse me.
I have to attend to
a personal matter of
pressing importance.
Bill's so busy
these days.
(sighing)
I'm going to miss
dancing with that dog.
You know, I dance
with the seniors
down at the
nursing home.
Maybe that would
cheer you up.
It would be nice to have
a boy there for a change.
Have you been listening?
I want to dance with dogs,
no told people.
Geez.
Hey.
MAN ON RADIO 1:
When you see him
in person
he is really
a monster.
MAN ON RADIO 2:
Five feet if
he's an inch.
This new planer
really does the trick,
huh, Ladybird?
(changes to slow
western swing music)
Watch it, Ladybird.
Daddy's using the planer.
What is it, Ladybird?
You like that
music, huh, girl?
Ladybird,
you're a beautiful dancer.
I'm looking
to adopt a dog
that could be
a good dancing partner.
One that can really
cut a rug.
I was thinking
maybe a longhair.
I like long hair.
That one there?
Yeah, well,
he looks like he's strong
and he's certainly got
a lot of energy.
Are they a good breed
for dog dancing?
Oh, yeah, they're,
uh, bred for dancing.
Oh! I hope
you like rock 'n roll!
So, you want to
dance with my dog.
But what’s in it
for the big dog... me, Khan?
Uh...
How about
you pick up Doggie's poo
from my yard?
That way, child prodigy Connie
get to study more
poo-picking hillbilly
get to dance with dog.
Universe in harmony.
He's a small dog.
How bad could it be?
Yeah.
Deal.
You start now!
Oh, geez!
What are you
feeding him?!
Just going to, uh, get gas.
♪ I go out walkin'
after midnight ♪
♪ Out in the moonlight,
just like we used to do... ♪
Hey, Peggy, you notice anything
different about Ladybird?
Is the left side of
her face paralyzed?
Nope. She's lost two pounds.
Tapeworm!
That was my second guess.
No. Since I've been,
uh, walking her more
she's been getting
in great shape. Listen.
No creaking joints
and I've stopped
giving her
her anti-inflammatory
medication.
(barks)
Even her bark
sounds more youthful.
It's like she's a puppy again.
You know, I'm going to keep...
walking her.
I don't care
what anybody thinks.
I love you, Peggy.
Hey, Ladybird
remember when you won
this ribbon
for cutest puppy
at the mall?
Huh, do you?
Labor Day?
Remember that, huh,
do you?
Fall of '89...
huh?
Do you remember?
(barks)
Yeah, me, too.
Let's win you another ribbon,
girl.
She's named after former
First Lady Lady Bird Johnson.
So, there is no
limit to the number
of sequins an entrant
can have on his costume?
Can I get that in writing?
Mr. Hill,
you forgot your pen.
Dad?
What are you doing here?
Okay, I know
what this looks like
and it is what it is.
You lied.
You made me think dog dancing
was for weirdos.
Wait a minute,
that's Khan's dog.
You're dancing
with the neighbor's dog
against me and Ladybird?
Well, what was I supposed to do,
not dance with a dog?!
And anyway, you said Ladybird
was too old to dance.
If you pumped her
full of pain pills
I'm make sure you're
both disqualified.
Well, what
do you care?
Looks like
you'll dance
with any dog
that will have you.
Oh, he's not
just any dog.
This little fella may
poo like a buffalo
but he dances like
Britney Spears.
Oh, yeah? Well, I think
this pup's going
to surprise you
with a few moves
of her own.
I believe it's up to the judges
to decide
who's got the moves
and who doesn't.
I'll see you
out on the dance floor.
Fwah!
That’s just a little taste.
Dad. Ladybird.
BOBBY:
Just let us in.
We'll go straight
to my room.
We need to practice.
You're dancing
with the neighbor's dog.
Go dance at the neighbor's.
Come on!
Leave,
or I'll call the pound.
You're scared, old man.
You're scared of my moves!
That's crazy.
Peggy?
Hank, this is
all very simple.
You both want to
dance with dogs.
Right. You each have a
dog you can dance with.
You take your dog
to the garage.
You dance
with her there.
Bobby gets to dance with
his dog in his bedroom.
Everybody gets to
dance with a dog.
Everybody wins.
(country line dance-
title music playing)
You ready to dance, Rex?
Of course you are.
It's in your blood.
♪... You never was my girl... ♪
Okay.
♪... when I'm gone ♪
♪ Oh, you
can tell your friends... ♪
(screaming)
♪... And laugh and joke about me
on the phone... ♪
You want to lead?
Is that it, boy?
♪... Go back into the barn ♪
♪ You can tell my feet
to hit the floor♪
♪ Or you can tell my lips
to tell my fingertips... ♪
(heavy sigh)
(screech)
(screaming)
A costume.
BILL:
Rex, j-just,
just move our paw.
That's...
(screaming)
Now, I know
this isn't our style
but you got to do
what you got to do.
Wow. Ladybird,
I really think
we're going to
win this thing.
Oh, Bill?
Hank, I know you
don't like dog dancing
but I need your advice.
I bought a dog
to dance with.
It won’t dance with me!
It's all my fault.
I'm doing something
to push it away
just like I pushed
away Lenore.
(groaning):
Bill, this isn't a good time.
I-I'm kind of
in the middle of something.
(chuckling):
Aw!
Doesn't Ladybird
look cute in that hat?
(gasping)
Hank.
You're dog dancing!
Look, you cannot tell Dale
or Boomhauer about this, okay?
They wouldn't understand.
No, of course
they wouldn't;
they're idiots.
Oh, isn't dog dancing
wonderful, Hank?
Yes.
What am I doing to make
the dog hate me, Hank?
Why? Why am I
so repulsive?
You're not repulsive,
Bill. Maybe...
Yes?
Maybe it's the song
you picked out.
The song, yes,
the song!
What about the song?
Let your dog
help choose the song.
Just don't let him
pick something
like "Doggie in the Window"
or"Hound Dog."
It's too obvious.
Wait, why am I
telling you this?
You're not entering
the competition, are you?
Well, yeah,
I thought...
Get out.
Mm-mm.
This is good.
Nice and salty.
I said the funniest thing today.
Well, I almost did...
Are you going to finish
that gristle?
Yes, as a matter
of fact, I am.
But you never eat
your gristle.
You always give it
to Ladybird.
(gobbling)
Spit it out.
You don't even like gristle.
But I do like the taste
of you not getting it.
Hank, Bobby, stop it.
No ribbon is more important
than your family.
For God's sake,
you are fighting over fat.
Yeah, you're right,
you're right.
Uh, let me make it up
to both of you.
Peggy, let's go out dancing
like we usually do
and let Bobby and Doggie
have the house to practice.
Alone.
But you have to lock
Ladybird in the garage.
Of course.
Oh, it is certainly nice
to get out of the house.
It's been so tense with all
the arguing and barking.
I'm glad you're having fun,
'cause you deserve it.
Oh! Hank...
You are dip-crazy
tonight.
Yup, yup.
So, uh, since
you brought it up
do you know if Bobby does
any dips in his routine?
Or any other moves
you've noticed.
Are you pumping me
for information?
How much backwards
walking are they doing?
A little, average or a lot?
Hank, I am trying really hard
to remain neutral here.
I thought you wanted
to dance with me.
I do, I do, you're right.
It’s just you and me, Ladybird.
What?!
You just blew it, mister.
Fine. You know what?
I hope Bobby wins.
What?
Oh, sure, go home to Bobby
and the neighbor's dog.
While you're at it
why don't you just move in
with Kahn and Mihn?
You can eat rice all day
and never celebrate Christmas.
Good luck, Hank.
It's got nothing
to do with luck, Peggy.
We're going to win this thing.
You're making a big mistake.
Ladybird hates you.
What do they see
in that yappy little rat?
We can win this thing
without them. Right, Ladybird?
You look great in that outfit,
by the way.
On the count of three,
everyone say "bones."
One, two...
Don't, don't move,
it’s just the red eye.
♪ Bones. ♪
Wow, these dogs are
dressed to the nines.
It's like they're going
to dance at the White House.
Don’t worry, Ladybird,
we're going to win this thing.
Remember,
it's not just about pageantry
it's about a man
and his dog dancing together.
That's what the people
came to see
and that's what
we're going to give them.
It's our trump card.
That's what we've got over
all these nut jobs, right, girl?
(whimpering)
Come on, Rex. Settle down.
We're going to be late
for the competition.
(barking)
(frightened yelping)
(sniffing)
(barking)
(humming)
(muffled bark)
Oh, he's dreaming.
ANNOUNCER:
Let's have another
big round of applause
for Pam Taylor and her
Irish setter, Sparkles.
Sparkles?
More like Fizzles.
Still leaving
the dance area.
I'm Dud Jeperson
along with Sketch Randall
and we’re just so gosh darn
happy to be here.
And they're off
the dance floor.
Next up is Hank Hill
and his purebred
bloodhound, Ladybird.
Are you ready
to see more dancing?
(polite clapping)
Okay, pup, this is it.
Uh, I just wanted
to, uh, apologize
for what Ladybird
and I are about to do.
Win.
(Pats Cline's "Walking
After Midnight"plays)
♪ I go out walking ♪
♪ After midnight ♪
♪ Out in the moonlight... ♪
Well hello to you, too,
Hank Hill.
SKETCH:
And what poise and mobility
from that bloodhound.
The feet, the hand
the tail, all moving
as one unit.
No wonder this proud bitch
was named after
our former First Lady.
(awning)
(chuckling)
Bill Dauterive and Rex,
you're on deck.
And uh, oh,
no muzzles.
Yeah, but I...
No muzzles.
Those are the rules.
Okay.
♪... somewhere a walkin' ♪
♪ After midnight ♪
♪ Searching for me. ♪
Way to go, girl.
It's not too late
for you and Doggie
to turn tail.
(chuckling)
Take some notes,
because this is how
people are going to be
dog dancing from now on.
Next up, Bobby Hill and
his mixed terrier, Doggie.
(Techtronic's
"Move This"plays)
♪ Yo, come on, move this ♪
♪ Shake that body ♪
♪ Shake that body ♪
♪ Shake that body ♪
♪ Shake that body ♪
We are witnessing
a dream.
I hope I never wake up
and this dance lasts forever.
A boy, a dog, a dance.
♪... many different flavors ♪
♪ And the spice is strong ♪
♪ Get into the hot stuff,
let me pour a little song... ♪
DUD:
Are they even
touching the floor?
Amazing.
♪ You've got to move this... ♪
Boy, the alley's
dead today.
♪ Baby let me show you
how to do this ♪
♪ You've got to move this ♪
♪ You're doing fine ♪
♪ Pump it, pump it,
pump, pump it up ♪
♪ Nothing
can make this one stop ♪
♪ You've got to move this... ♪
DUD:
I don't even know how
to describe that move.
SKETCH:
I wish everyone
who denies
the pure athleticism
of dog dancing
could see what I'm
seeing right now.
(applauding)
It's okay, Ladybird.
All flash, no substance.
And the third prize
for Beginners Off-Leash
Musical Freestyle goes to...
Rhonda Clark and her
Border Collie, Rusty.
Second prize
goes to...
Bobby Hill
and his neighbor's
dog, Doggie.
Oh!
And first prize
goes to...
This is it, girl.
Helen Bradley and her
toy poodle, Buddy.
Well, we did our best, girl.
It's a young dog's sport.
Come on, let's go home.
Time for your nap.
You want
to watch me paint, girl?
It's semi-gloss.
(radio plays
"Walking After Midnight")
No, Ladybird, that's not for us.
Oh, how can I say no
to that face?
♪ Maybe he's cryin' for me ♪
♪ And as the skies turn gloomy ♪
Care to cut in, son?
There's someone else
I owe this dance to.
♪... as Lonesome as I can be ♪
Ma'am.
Now, where were we?
♪... after midnight ♪
♪ Out in the starlight... ♪
Captioned by
Media Access Group at WGBH
access. Wgbh. Org
SKETCH:
Just move our paw.