Jep & Jessica: Growing the Dynasty (2016–2017): Season 1, Episode 11 - The Meeting - full transcript

All right, friends and family.

I called y'all here
because in a few days,

I have a big meeting
for the Calvary line

that we've worked
really hard to open... Yes.

the last year and a half.

I'm really excited.
I'm nervous.

I really wanted y'all
to see each piece

and kind of
tell me what you think,

and I just really
wanted to celebrate

because I have my meeting.

In the past two years,
I've been working on a jewelry line



called Calvary Jewelry,

and we recently
got the opportunity

to schedule a meeting
with a major department store.

This piece right here
has amazonite.

Beautiful! You can see it kind of has
the two J's for me and Jep.

Beautiful. And this has the abalone.

Beautiful. Beautiful, even though
it sounds like "baloney."

It is beautiful.Beautiful.

That is beautiful. That is beautiful.
Really beautiful.

Even the bag's beautiful.
Everything is beautiful.

Now that I'm through
creating the line,

I thought it would be really fun

to have my friends and family
over for a sip and see.

Wait. Is that what
I walked into?



Yeah.

A sip and see.

I like these--

Like, I did this with,
like, a white blouse.

I love that.

Hey, Jess.Goodness.

Nerd alert.

Do you have
the precision screwdrivers?

The little ones.

What is on your head, son?
It's my headlamp, Mom.

I'm building a supercomputer
in there.

Well, you look like
a nerdy coalminer.

I gotta be honest with you,

this is like me

walking in
the women's department--

like, the lingerie department
of a store--

and, you know,
everybody's staring at me.

I felt like a total weirdo,
like I wasn't supposed to be there.

You weren't
supposed to be there.

I realize that now.

You haven't seen
my little screwdrivers? No, babe.

We're just having our party.

980 GTX.

Um, I don't-- don't understand.

Best video card you can get.
Makes everything awesome.

Yeah. All right.

All right. Beat it, nerd.

Thanks, guys.
Good times. Jewelry.

What is a supercomputer? Anyway...

He always was the weirdest
of all my boys.

What about your soccer game?
How many goals did you score?

Zero. What?

What do you wanna say to
Mama, wishing her good luck?

Good luck.

Boring. What do you
want to say?

You're boring.

Your mom and them are boring.

You are our Mom and them, so... Faces...

Here she comes.

♪ The redneck Martha Stewart

Jep! Don't be silly. You're much hotter,

and you haven't done
any time in jail. Not yet.

Are you fired up? Jep, put the camera down.

- Yes, I'm excited.
- I'm, like...

Trying to make sure I got everything
I need for your mom. Buster...

Hey, he's gonna have fun
with Mama Kay today.

You sure you wanna take him?
You can leave him with me. Trust me,

at the dentist's office,
you won't want him to be there.

I mean, it's--
it's tough enough.Yeah.

He's got this new thing-- have you
noticed-- where he starts crying,

and he sounds like the guy
from Forrest Gump.

Okay? It freaks me out. Anyway,

bring a book because it'll be
a pretty long appointment.

Are you guys excited
about the dentist?

No.You love getting shots
in your mouth, and--

Shut up. Don't scare 'em. Good grief.
One time, I walked in the house,

and my grandma had pliers, and she
was pulling my grandpa's tooth out.

Jep, that's--There was blood everywhere.

Everywhere.
Jep.

How many times do you need
to go to the dentist, anyway? Twice a year.

You take us, like,
eight times a year.

That's not true.

When they stick
that needle down your throat,

that thing's, like, this long,

and they inject, like,
this much liquid.

Just...

Jep. Jep. It hurts so bad.

I mean, you still need
to go to the dentist.

We have braces.

Scill, that's the orthodontist,
not dentist.

Well, who cares?

And, the orthodontist
puts metal stuff on your face.

What?

Merritt, that was
a terrible explanation.

Have you ever seen that drill?

And when they put their gloves in your mouth,
and their fingernails go in your gums.

And I'm, like... Rrrr!
You're being weird.

They really stick their
fingernails in your gums? Yeah.

That's weird. And they're like, "Bite
my finger," and they're, like...

They say,
"Bite your finger?" Yeah.

Who is this dentist?
Who is this person?

All right, babe.
You got this?

I'm a bearded Mrs. Doubtfire,

except I'm not gonna
dress up like a woman, Okay.

and we're not divorced,
and the kids know who I am.Okay.

All right.
You sure you have everything? I got it.

1:30. Appointment's at 1:30.I got it.
Love you.

Bye, guys. I love you.
Y'all be sweet.Bye.

Bye, baby.Okay. Love you.

Be safe.

Dad, we need to make
something for Mama.

That would be awesome.
This is a big day for her.Yeah.

Make her, like, a card, or--

Let's do a big banner.

A banner? Yeah.

Like a "We love you, Mom"?
"We're proud of you, Mom"?

Something like that? Yeah.

"You are legit-- too legit...

to quit"?

You guys don't know that.

Yeah, we'll do a banner.

There we go.

Yeah. All right.

Hey, Kay.Hey.

What is wrong?

I'm sick. You didn't call me.

I'm sorry.
I tried to text you today,

but I don't think
I did it right.

'Cause, actually,
it came back to me. I never received it.

And then I called your home phone
and got an answering machine.

It wasn't even your voice. We don't have
a home phone, Kay.

I have a house number
and a cell number. All right. Well--

Well, you should have
an answering machine,

because that's the best way
you know people called.

Thank you.

Yeah.

Kay is great with my kids.

Unfortunately,
she is not great with technology.

Good gracious.

And you know we don't have
good cell service.

I think it's from
the trees or something.

It's too much in the, um--
in the wilderness.

All right, well--That's where we live.

In the wilderness.

I don't want
baby Gus to get sick,

so that's why I'm going to
have to take Gus with me

all the way to Little Rock
for my meeting.

Okay, look, I'm just gonna
have to bring him with me.

He's a little modern child
that goes to business meetings.

All right, well, if I don't leave
now, I'm gonna be late for my meeting.

I love you.
Get better, okay?

I love you.
Good luck!

All right, buddy.

You are coming to Little Rock
with Mama.

She's gonna love the sign.

Are you eating the paint?

Guys, you know,
it's a big deal for Mom

to even get a meeting
with Dillard's.

All right. That's plenty, buddy.

He went poopy.

Knock, knock.

Martini, come on in, dude.

What are y'all doing?
We're doing some crafts, dude.

Jess had a big meeting today
with Dillard's,

so we're making her a banner.

This looks really good, guys.

I'm gonna do a separate sign
that says, "I'm proud of you

for making this sign."

So y'all don't have a whole lot
going on today, then?

Well, actually,
we got dentist appointments.

Nah, you can't let a dentist appointment
get in the way of a good time.

Y'all know the new
trampoline park, right? Yeah!

Guess who's got free passes?

Uncle Martin. Can we go?

Wait a second.

Dude, I got to take the kids
to the dentist.

But the dentist isn't fun, Daddy.
Yeah.

We wanna go to the trampoline
park. Come on, Dad.

I like being an honorary uncle
to these kids

because I get to go have all
the fun in the world with him,

but I have no responsibilities.

Who's your favorite uncle? Martin.

I mean, who else is gonna show up
here with free trampoline passes?

Certainly not their dad.
That's what cool uncles do.

How often do you get
free tramp stamps?

What are tramp stamps?

We'll talk about that later.

When I was a kid, you could
always find me on the trampoline.

Until the deal dry-rotted
from being outside

and I would jump through it.

That happened
on more than one occasion.

You were a big kid. I was.

I've seen pictures.Yep. Done it.

I'm only one man. I can't use all these
passes. And, plus, it's kind of weird.

Like, I'd be the only 30-year-old
guy there without kids.

So I need the kids. I don't really
need you, per se, but I need your kids.

That may come off
a little creepy.

Yeah. Kind of creepy.

The trampoline passes
just saved your day, buddy.

Who wants to go to the dentist when
they can go jump on a trampoline?

Not me. You're gonna be the best dad
ever at the end of this day.

You're welcome.

I cannot miss these appointments.
They're stacked.

I'm not sure what that means.

So, if we could
jump afterwards--

Hey, what's--
What happened here?

See, trampolines don't do that.
Wooden floors do.

If he falls on a trampoline,
he just bounces.

Let me take them to the dentist.
Let's all go.

No, see, that's where I'm out.
I gotta be in Shreveport at 4:00.

Why you gotta go to Shreveport?

I gotta go to some sporting
goods store there and sign stuff.

You know how it is.
Why does it have to be today?

'Cause they expire today.
This is grand-opening week.

This is the last day
of the week. I just don't know, man.

I mean, look at the faces
of these kids.

Please, Dad? There we go.

Please?
Naa...

Who wants to go
to the trampoline park?

Me! "Me!"

Well, crap.
How do I argue with that?

Yeah, be the cool dad.
Be good cop for once.

You ain't gotta be
bad cop today.

Naaa...

Best idea ever. Of course it is.

Come on, Jep. Boo-yah!

Cowabunga, dude!

Barrel roll.

Good Lord.

Are you ready?
Yeah. I'm nervous.

I mean, this is a big deal.

I mean, he's coming.
I'm like, "Uhhh."

I know, but look.
Dillard's is our kind of people.

I promise you you'll fit in. All right.

Crud.
He just spit up all over me.

Gus is such a great baby,

but I'm a little nervous about
bringing him to this meeting.

He gets loud at times.

Like-- Like now.
He likes to talk.

Hi.You come sit here.

This is baby Gus.

He's crashing the party.

I'm hoping that since my meeting
is mainly with women,

that they can sympathize
with me a little bit.

He just spit milk onto my face.

You silly boy.

I'm so sorry I had to bring him.
But my mother-in-law got sick,

and I had to bring him with me.

So, maybe, um, he'll just be
my little good luck charm.

This is his launch
into the fashion industry. I'm sure.

And speaking of,
here's our jewelry line, Calvary.

So "Calvary" is the name?
Okay.Yes.

Shane and I were talking
about, um, you know,

each piece of jewelry
having just a little slip

that has, like,
a Scripture on it.

I like it.
I think it sets it apart

because we see a lot
of beautiful jewelry.

You know, every day we're
working with great product,

but this makes
the product your own.

Sorry.

I'm sorry

Yeah, I better take care
of this.

That's okay.

Okay, I'll be back. That's okay.

I'm sorry.

Y'all having fun or what? Yeah.

Guys, let's come here,
like, all the time.

Is this the best day of your
life, Merritt, or not?

I think it's the best day
of my life.

I thought the best day of your life
is when you got married to Mommy.

It's really close.

See, I can still be a responsible
dad and be the fun dad too.

I'm kind of like a superhero.

I think we should go
to the dentist

and not get in trouble by Mom.

Boring.

Dad, you know
it's after 1:00?Crap.

Yeah, I think we need to go.

All right. We got time.

Did I give you my phone? No.

Did I give you
my phone, Merritt?.

I think I lost my phone.

I lost my phone in the foam.

I really need
to find this phone.

If I'm late
to this dentist appointment,

it's gonna make things
a lot worse.

Dad, you really should learn
to be more responsible.

You should get one of
those cell phone holders.

So I'll be one of those nerds
with a cell phone holster.

Won't be as cool then.

Y'all see anything yet?

Why'd you bring
your phone in here?

It was an accident, Lil.

I think I found a retainer.

Ew! That's disgusting.

I just found a sock.

Guys, we are a team.

If I go down, we all go down.

No. I didn't pick on going
to the trampoline park.

Yeah, you picked--I said we should
go to the dentist.

In worst-case scenario,
we throw Martin under the bus.

We make him look terrible.

I'm not seeing anything.

Nothing over here.

Another sock.

Cowabunga!

Are you under here?

Yes.

Dude... What happened?

Dude, you elbowed me right on top
of the head. Is that what that was?

I thought that was
one of these blocks.

All right, dude.
You gotta help me outta here.

How am I gonna
help you outta here?

I can't get outta here.

My Gosh. I mean, seriously,
I'm standing on my heahere.

I'm sorry I landed on you, but you
shouldn't have been buried in the foam.

That's just dumb.

Dude, you were not meant to
jump in the foam pit. Too big.

Well, I'm not gonna deny that,

because the only thing worse
than jumping into a foam pit

is trying to get
out of that sucker.

You ain't lying there.

How do you get out of this crap?

I mean,
I can't get out of this crap.

Jep, I need some help.

I gotta get out.

I can't get outta here!

Everybody get my phone.

I got these trampoline passes,
and I thought, "Hey,

be the perfect kid
and adult activity."

After going there-- no.

If you weigh more than 75 pounds,
that foam pit loses all fun.

It becomes a workout
and torture chamber.

You can't get out
of these things!

You find my phone,
I'll give you 20 bucks.

Whoa, I'm going.

I'm just gonna sit right here.

These blocks are wet.

I immediately regret
this decision.

Totally not worth getting
in trouble with Jess.

Bad call, Martin.

I'm exhausted.

Lily, go help him, please.

I found it! You found it?

Yeah. What time is it?

2:05.Crap.

My gosh. All right.

Well, that was fun.
I'm outta here, though.

All right, kids.
You got my phone? You got it from here?

Hey, did y'all have fun?

Let's get outta here.
Come on. Not everybody all at once.

Scilla, let's go.
Come on.

I think my legs are broken.

Phewy! Phewy!

So, I'm looking
through some of the pictures.

There are a couple
of comments, though.

I do think this-- the
block lettering on this--

Because this is sterling, and it's
very pretty and light and delicate,

I think having
the block lettering

is kind of contradictory
to the delicate, light feel.

A little more teen. It's a little bit
more teen.

And I think if you're kind of
going for the sterling,

it's more of a elevated look.
Feminine.

- It's very feminine.
- I just think that--

that's kind of gonna
get away from that feel.Shh.

Anything else that you--

I think we can capitalize more than on
the earrings, though, that are shown.

Sorry. He usually
doesn't do this.

He thinks we're all
talking to him.

He's talking back.

Gus has been a little bit of
a handful through the meeting.

I'm really passionate
about this jewelry line,

and I want it to succeed.

But I do want these ladies to know
that first and foremost, I'm a mom.

So if he has to come with me
to every meeting, so be it.

I think the next step
would definitely--

Let's review with our team
to see if this is something,

you know,
that's really gonna work in our--

in our jewelry assortment.

So, I think that's
where we need to

kind of go from here.Okay.

Thank you so much
for showing us the line,

and especially getting up at 4:00 a.m.
and driving with a baby.

That's okay. As long as you don't mind
the baby and the bags under my eyes.

Thank y'all. All right.
Thank you.

You're it! Tag!

I got you! Kids, y'all quit
messing around in there.

Didn't y'all play enough today?

Hey, guys.
Mama!

Look!

- Did y'all make me that banner?
- Yeah.

Aw, that is so sweet.

How was your big day? Well, how was yours?

And why didn't you make
it to the dentist?.

How do you know that? They called me
when they missed their appointment, so...

Um... yeah.

We-- S--

It's a long story.

I used to get in trouble every
now and again with my mom.

I mean, she's super sweet,

but she can get
kind of mad at me sometimes.

But compared to getting
in trouble with Jess--

not even in the same league.

Pow!

Every worse thing
you could imagine in one day--

it all happened to me.
Did you have a wreck?

No, I didn't have a wreck,
but I'm surprised I didn't.

Well, what did y'all do today?
I was gonna make it there,

but we went to
a trampoline park.

Wait. Why would you go
to a trampoline park today?

All right.
I dropped the ball on this one.

I was trying to be the cool cop
and the good cop,

and I should've just took 'em
to the dentist appointment

and not worried
about being a cop.

We got these passes
to the trampoline park.

We got tramp stamps.

What?

Tramp stamps.

Jep.

We got trampoline stamp passes.

Martin had 'em.
He was showing 'em all to the kids.

They got all excited.
Like, "I wanna go, I wanna go, I wanna go."

There was no way I could say no,
and I thought, "I got plenty of time."

I lost my phone.
I went to go look for it.

Then Martin jumps on my neck.
I'm laid out.

You're standing here now,
and--I was basically paralyzed.

You and Martin shouldn't be
bouncing at the trampoline park.

I mean, we were just
having a good time.

We are too old to be doing that.

You're too old,
and he looks too old to be doing that.

I'm just saying I lost my phone,
he jumped on my neck,

I was laid out,
River had diarrhea...

What?

So...

Seriously, Jep?

Well-- No.

Jep--Anyway, look.

It was the worst day of my life.

Well, here's what's
gonna happen.

I spoke with the doctor's office
on the way back.

I rescheduled
their appointments.

Tomorrow Merritt's going,
Lily's going Friday,

and I stacked Priscilla
and River's for next Tuesday.

And you're gonna be
the one to take 'em.

All three times.

I'm cool with next week,
but I can't tomorrow.

I'm doing a rave
with my guild. Um, no, you're not.

We've been planning this
for, like, a week.

I guess I'm taking 'em
to the dentist.

Even though Jep did not get
the kids to the dentist,

I will have to say that I could
not have done this jewelry line

without Jep
and the kids' support.

She's the smartest person
I know.

Anyway, look,
forget about that crap.

How did your day go?

Well, it was exciting and scary.

Started off a little rocky.

You know I had to
bring Gus with me?

I didn't know.Yeah. Your mom was sick.

They loved the line,
but then they said they have to,

like, go meet about it.

And then, about two hours
into my drive home,

I got a call, and they said

they are moving forward
with the Calvary line. What?

So they're moving forward
with the Calvary line.

I know. I was excited. Yes!

This is the first business move
I've done on my own.

So to know that, um,

Dillard's loves it
and wants to carry my line--

it's a huge achievement.

What? They are gonna
start out in 20 stores.

What? And I'm gonna
do some appearances.

That's awesome!

Give me a hug! Yeah!

I'm so excited! Yay! Family hugs.

Ooh. Yay!

- My neck.
My neck. I'm sorry. I forgot.

I'm sorry.

Hey, Daddy.Hey.

How's your neck?

Girls, do you like
your jewelry? Yes.

This is my favorite.
We're proud of you

for working so hard
doing your jewelry.

Gus is proud. Thank you.

You're too old to go jump
in the jumpy pit, okay?

I'm gonna bring Gus
with me next time. Goodness.