Inspector Gadget (1983–1986): Season 1, Episode 51 - Funny Money - full transcript

[SIREN]

♪ INSPECTOR GADGET

♪ WHOO HOO

♪ INSPECTOR GADGET

♪ INSPECTOR GADGET

♪ WHOO HOO

♪ INSPECTOR GADGET

♪ GO, GADGET, GO

♪ GO, GADGET, GO

♪ INSPECTOR GADGET

♪ WHOO HOO



♪ INSPECTOR GADGET

CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY
FOX FAMILY CHANNEL

AND THE U.S DEPARTMENT
OF EDUCATION

SO, THIS IS THE AUTOMAT.
HOW DOES IT WORK?

Gadget: FIRST, YOU PUT
A COIN IN THE SLOT.

HMM, MUST BE JAMMED.

JUST A LITTLE TWIST
WITH THE GADGET
SCREWDRIVER.

YAAAH!

[BOTH LAUGH]

HMM. WOWSERS.
[TELEPHONE RINGS]

THAT'S
THE TOP-SECRET
GADGET PHONE.

IS THAT YOU, CHIEF?
YOU'RE WHERE?

OH, HI, CHIEF.

SORRY TO INTERRUPT
YOUR LUNCH, GADGET.



HERE'S
YOUR ASSIGNMENT.

"ONE MEMBER
OF THE FUNNY MONEY
COUNTERFEITING GANG

"HAS ESCAPED
PENITENTIARY.

"SUSPECT M.A.D.
BEHIND ESCAPE.

"INFILTRATE PRISON
AS A CONVICT

"AND STOP ANY FURTHER
ATTEMPTS TO ESCAPE.

THIS MESSAGE
WILL SELF-DESTRUCT."

GOT IT, CHIEF.
I'M ALWAYS ON DUTY.

[GASPS]

OH!

DUTY CALLS, PENNY.

WELL, I'M OFF
ON ANOTHER

TOP-SECRET
AND DANGEROUS
ASSIGNMENT.

BYE, UNCLE GADGET.
BE CAREFUL.

I'M WORRIED, BRAIN.

YOU'D BETTER
FOLLOW HIM.

RUFF!

I WONDER WHERE
THE PRISONERS
PARK THEIR CARS.

ALL SET
FOR THE BREAKOUT.

SQUINT AND INKY
SHOULD BE WAITING.

Dr. Claw: GOOD. PROCEED.

HUH? GADGET'S HERE.

TODAY MUST BE LAUNDRY DAY.

MMM, NO DOORBELL.

GO, GO, GADGET LEGS.

ANY TIME NOW, SQUINT,

CLAW WILL BUST US
OUTTA--HUH?

EXCUSE ME.

WHO'S THERE?
I CAN'T SEE.

COULD YOU TELL ME
WHERE THE PRISONER'S
PARKING LOT IS?

UH, SURE THING.
IN FACT,

I SHOULD MOVE MY CAR
BEFORE I GET A TICKET.

I DIDN'T SEE IT
ON MY WAY IN.

YOU'D BETTER CHECK.
GO, GO, GADGET LEGS.

YIIEE!

EH, THANKS.

DON'T MENTION IT.

WE'LL GET SQUINT
AFTER HE ELIMINATES GADGET.

INKY? INKY?

OOF.

I GUESS HE CAN'T
FIND HIS CAR.

THANK YOU.
I'M A LITTLE
NEARSIGHTED.

P.A.: EXERCISE TIME'S OVER.

EVERYONE BACK
TO YOUR CELLS.

I--I MISPLACED
MY GLASSES.

WOWSERS. THIS IS
EXPENSIVE-LOOKING WALLPAPER.

DID YOU DO THIS?

I'M THE BEST ENGRAVER
IN THE WORLD.

WHAT DO YOU SAY WE BUST
OUTTA HERE, BUSTER?

NO NEED TO BREAK ANYTHING.

GO, GO, GADGET KEY.

THE BIG MAN SENT YOU
TO SPRING ME, RIGHT?

YOU MEAN, YOU WORK
FOR THE CHIEF, TOO?

OF COURSE. COME ON.

Penny: "THE THIEVES
TOOK PAPER AND INK

USED ONLY IN
THE PRINTING OF MONEY"?

OH, THAT'S IT!
[BEEPS]

BRAIN!
RUFF!

THE FUNNY MONEY GANG
IS SETTING UP

THEIR COUNTERFEITING
OPERATION.

WE'VE GOT TO STOP THEM
BEFORE THEY START PRINTING.

YOU FIND UNCLE GADGET,
AND I'LL BE THERE SOON.

[GRUNTING]

HELLO.

GOOD-BYE.

WE'VE GOT
TO BE QUIET.

COME ON.
OOF!

WE'RE STUCK.

USE ONE
OF YOUR GIZMOS.

RIGHT.
GO, GO, GADGET KEY.

OUCH!

MY GLASSES.

LET ME HELP YOU.

[GLASS BREAKS]

I FOUND YOUR GLASSES.

[GROANS]

[GASPS]
THEY'RE USELESS.

SORRY ABOUT THAT.

OH, JUST GET US OUT.

GO, GO, GADGET KEY.
[ALARM BLARES]

YIKES, DON'T SHOOT.

HALT!

UH, WE'RE LOOKING
FOR THE PRISONERS'
PARKING LOT.

[SNORES]

Dr. Claw: SQUINT.

HUH? WHAT?

WHO'S THERE?

WE'RE COMING
FOR YOU TONIGHT.

DON'T FORGET
THE PLATES.

BUT WHAT ABOUT HIM?

THAT'S GADGET.
GET RID OF HIM.

HA HA. NO PROBLEM,
DR. CLAW.

[LAUGHS]

[GADGET SNORING]

HAVE A NICE SLEEP,
GADGET.

TOO BAD YOU'RE NOT
GONNA WAKE UP!

[YAWNS]
TIME TO GET UP

AND MAKE THE BED.

AAH!
[GRUNTS]

TIME TO GET UP,
MR. SQUINT.

YOU WOULDN'T
WANT THE CHIEF

TO CATCH YOU
SLEEPING ON THE JOB.

COME ON, OPEN THE DOOR.

WHERE ARE WE GOING?

Squint: WE'VE GOT
KITCHEN DUTY.

WOWSERS. MAYBE I CAN
COOK UP MY SPECIALTY...

BLUEBERRY
CABBAGE SURPRISE.

OOF!

COME IN, BRAIN.

RUFF.

Penny: I'M OUTSIDE
THE PRISON NOW.

YOU FIND
UNCLE GADGET,

AND I'LL
KEEP WATCH HERE.

WOWSERS.
LOOK AT THE SIZE
OF THOSE OVENS.

WHERE?

BETTER CHECK
TO SEE IF THEY'RE EMPTY.

RIGHT, MASTER CHEF.

[LAUGHS]

WOWSERS,
IS IT DARK IN THERE.

I CAN'T SEE A THING.

CHARGE!

GO, GO, GADGET FLASHLIGHT.

OOPS.

YEOW!

HUH? WOWSERS.
IT'S ALIVE.

GET ME OUTTA HERE.

WAAH! IT'S HOT!
OW!

AAH-OW!

[BABBLES]

I'D BE GLAD TO HELP
CHOP THESE CABBAGES,

BUT I'LL DO IT THE EASY WAY.

GO, GO, GADGET COPTER.

NOW I GOTCHA. WHAT?

SQUINT? MR. SQUINT?

HMM, MAYBE
HE WENT SHOPPING.

Dr. Claw: IS EVERYTHING
READY TO ROLL?

YEAH, THE PRESS
IS ALL SET.

ALL WE NEED IS SQUINT,
AND PRESTO...

INSTANT MONEY!

CONTACT
THE LAUNDRY TRUCK.

I'LL BE WAITING
OUTSIDE THE PRISON.

YES, DR. CLAW.

BEFORE MORNING,
M.A.D. CAT,
[MEOWS]

WE'LL HAVE ENOUGH MONEY
TO BUY ENTIRE COUNTRIES
FOR M.A.D.!

[HUMS]

HMM.
[LAUGHS]

[INSPECTOR GADGET
HUMMING]

[CLANG]

HMM, MUST BE BREAK TIME.

OHH.

I GOT HIM! I GOT HIM!

Dr. Claw: SQUINT,
THE LAUNDRY TRUCK
IS ON ITS WAY.

I GOT HIM!

GOOD. NOW GET GOING.

UH-OH.

[BRAKES SCREECH]

I WONDER IF
THAT LAUNDRY TRUCK

HAS ANYTHING TO DO
WITH THE FUNNY MONEY GANG.

WORKING KIND OF LATE
TONIGHT, EH?

UM, YEAH, UM,
UH, NIGHT SHIFT.

OK, GO AHEAD.

I CAN'T SEE A THING.

I'LL NEVER
GET OUT OF HERE.

AH, SO, THERE YOU ARE.

OH, BOY. AM I GLAD
TO SEE YOU.

THERE'S BEEN
A CHANGE IN PLANS.

CHIEF'S ORDERS?

YEAH, YEAH.
UH, UH, WE'RE ON
LAUNDRY DUTY NOW.

COME ON.

OOF!

I THINK IT'S THIS WAY.

UH, RIGHT.

Squint:
IS THE TRUCK THERE?

ONE LAUNDRY TRUCK
WAITING FOR DIRTY LAUNDRY.

LET'S GO.

I'LL GET HIM THIS TIME.

SQUINT, NO.

Squint: I GOT HIM!

Gadget:
THEY SURE TAKE

A LOT OF BREAKS
AROUND HERE.
OW.

OOH.

WOWSERS, WAIT FOR MEEEE!

Brain: WHOA!

I KNOW THESE GATES
ARE AROUND HERE
SOMEWHERE.

OK, BUDDY. I'LL HELP
YOU ESCAPE, TOO,

IF YOU TELL ME
WHERE THE GATES ARE.

TAKE A LEFT?

[BABBLES]

RIGHT.

READY? FIRE LASERS.

DR. CLAW.

[SIREN BLARES]

Dr. Claw: I WOULD PREFER

NOT TO HAVE ANY COMPANY.

OH, NO. THEY'RE
GETTING AWAY.

HOW AM I GOING
TO SAVE BRAIN
AND UNCLE GADGET?

[BEEPS]

BRAIN, CAN YOU HEAR ME?

RIGHT!

PHEW.

Penny: CAN YOU TALK?

[BABBLES]

DID YOU HEAR
SOMETHING?

Penny: USE YOUR
HOMING SIGNAL.

[BEEPS]
GOOD WORK, BRAIN.

WOWSERS, WHY IS
THE PRISON LAUNDRY
SO FAR AWAY?

IT'S YOU!

SO, WHERE ARE
THE WASHING MACHINES?

RIGHT THIS WAY.
OOF!

LET ME HELP.

I'M ALWAYS ON DUTY.

HERE'S SQUINT.

UH, HIYA, SQUINTY.
WHO'S YOUR FRIEND?

HELLO, BOYS.

OH, IT'S OK.
HE'S WITH ME.

ARE THEY WORKING
FOR THE CHIEF, TOO?

Squinty: YEAH.
HA HA HA HA!

JUST LIKE US.

WOW, THIS IS
A BIG OPERATION.

[WHIMPERS]

Dr. Claw:
GADGET! INKY,

TAKE OUR HELPER
ON A TOUR.

SQUINT,
YOU GET TO WORK.

[YOWLS, SNICKERS]

RIGHT.

TAKE CARE
OF HIM, INKY.

YOU KNOW WHAT TO DO.

YEAH, COME ON.

THIS SHOULD REALLY
BE INTERESTING.

LET'S GET TO WORK.

WOWSERS,
LOOK AT THE SIZE
OF THOSE PRESSES.

NO HAND IRONING HERE.

YIPE!

HMM.

AAH!

CAREFUL NOW.
SOMEONE COULD
GET HURT.

YOU HAVE
TO BE CAUTIOUS

AROUND INDUSTRIAL
MACHINERY.

I'LL
GET YOU YET.

AHA.

[WHIMPERS]

MMM. THIS LOOKS
LIKE THE WALLPAPER

I SAW
IN SQUINT'S CELL.

THIS'LL FIX HIM.

[LAUGHS]

[WHISTLES]

VERY PRETTY.
THESE ARE NICE, TOO.

DESIGNER SHEETS.

THIS IS
A VERY FANCY
PRISON.

YOU FAILED TWICE.

GET GADGET!

OK.

THIS LAUNDRY LOOKS
LIKE A MILLION DOLLARS.

UNH!

OH!

I'M IMPRESSED.

AAH!

[WHIMPERS]

SOUNDS LIKE MICE.

WHA? I GIVE UP.

[PENNY GASPS]
THEY STARTED
PRINTING THE MONEY!

BRAIN, ARE YOU IN THERE?

[GRUNTS]

I'LL FIND OUT HOW
THEY PLAN TO ESCAPE
WITH THE FUNNY MONEY.

YOU TAKE CARE
OF UNCLE GADGET.

[GRUMBLES]

THEY CAN'T USE
THE LAUNDRY TRUCK.

THE POLICE HAVE SEEN IT.

[DING]
THE ROOF?

OF COURSE.

HOW MUCH
HAVE WE GOT PRINTED?

GEE, I DON'T KNOW.

I CAN'T COUNT
THAT HIGH, BOSS.

Dr. Claw: GOOD.
HEH HEH HEH.

I'LL MEET YOU
AT M.A.D. HEADQUARTERS.

DESTROY ALL THE EVIDENCE
AND GADGET WITH IT.

Squint:
EH, DON'T WORRY, BOSS.

I'M LOOKIN'
FORWARD TO IT.

SQUINT WANTS YA
TO WAIT IN HERE.

I GET IT.
IT'S A SOFTNESS TEST.

[BOTH LAUGH]

Inky: GADGET'LL GET
A BANG OUTTA THIS.

[BOTH LAUGH]
[TICKING]

Gadget:
AHA, HE'S TIMING ME.
I'D BETTER HURRY.

GOSH, LOOK AT
ALL THAT MONEY.

IF IT GETS
TO DR. CLAW,

THEY'LL BE
NO STOPPING HIM.

LET'S GET OUTTA HERE.

THE BOMB'S SET
TO GO OFF ANY MINUTE.

GADGET WILL NEVER
KNOW WHAT HIT HIM.

A BOMB? OH, NO!

[TICKS]

BRAIN, THERE'S
A BOMB DOWN THERE.

SAVE UNCLE GADGET.

[BARKS]

OHH!

[TICKING]

TIME'S NOT UP YET.
I CAN STILL HEAR
YOUR STOPWATCH.

WOW!

Gadget:
I'LL SOON KNOW

WHICH PILE
IS THE SOFTEST.

IT'S THIS ONE.

IT'S DEFINITELY SOFTER.

THE DOOR'S LOCKED.

NO PROBLEM
WITH MY GADGET KEY.

[GRUNTS]

HURRY, BRAIN.
THEY'RE GETTING
READY TO LEAVE.

Gadget:
A LITTLE TWIST, AND...

[GRUNTS]

OPEN!

HEY,
YOU MUST BE

ONE OF
THE COUNTERFEITERS!

[WHIMPERS]

[TICKING]

HALT, YOU CULPRIT!

BRAIN, GET OUT OF THERE!

HURRY!

I'M ALWAYS ON DUTY.

THERE'S NO ESCAPING
INSPECTOR GADGET.

OH, NO. IT'S GADGET.

HEY, WAIT!
I'VE CAUGHT ONE
OF THE BAD GUYS!

COME BACK!

GO, GO, GADGET ARMS.

BRAIN!

RROW!

QUICK, BRAIN,
WE'VE GOT TO GET
OUT OF HERE.

CALLING CHIEF QUIMBY.

Squint: THAT'S THE LAST
WE'LL SEE OF GADGET.

[ALL LAUGH]

GOSH.

MY, MY.
MUST HAVE OVERLOADED
THE RINSE CYCLE.

OOF!

YOU HEAR SOMETHIN'?

YEAH, WHAT IS IT?

AH, GEE.
IT'S GADGET.

LET'S GET THE REST
OF THOSE FUNNY MONEY TYPES.

HE THINKS
WE'RE ON HIS SIDE.

[BOTH LAUGH]

LET'S TAKE HIM
FOR A RIDE.

THEY MUST KNOW
A SHORTCUT.

WOW, THESE CLOUDS
ARE THICK.

AAH! SQUINTY!

GO, GO, GADGET SKATES.

SOUNDS LIKE
A STORM.

THIS SHORTCUT IS MORE
LIKE A SHORT CIRCUIT.

WOWSERS.

THEY SHOULD BE MORE CAREFUL
WITH THEIR CARGO.

HA HA HA HA HA.

BUT YOU CAN'T
CLOSE THE ORPHANAGE.

I'M FORECLOSING
THE MORTGAGE

UNLESS
I GET MY MONEY.

THIS IS YOUR
LAST CHANCE. OOF!

MMM, OH.

YAY, WE CAN STAY!
YAY!

UH, GADGET'S
STILL WITH US.

WE'LL TAKE HIM
TO SEE DR. CLAW,

BUT LET'S GET THROUGH
THIS CLOUD FIRST.

All: AAH! OH, NO!

THEY'RE GOING TO CRASH!

OOH, THIS BETTER WORK.
[BEEPS]

I KNEW THIS
WAS A SHORTCUT.

22 DEGREES NORTHWEST
LOCKED IN.

THAT'LL GET HIM HOME
IN A HURRY, BRAIN.

DO YOU KNOW
WHAT YOU ARE DOIN'?

I CAN FLY THIS THING
BLINDFOLDED.

WE DID IT!
RUFF!

Intercom: WARDEN,
THERE'S A CHOPPER COMING IN.

CONDITION RED!
CONDITION RED!

SEE? WE'RE HERE,

JUST LIKE
I PROMISED.

Inky: YEAH,
NICE WORK, SQUINT.

GOOD WORK, GADGET.
WE'VE GOT THE WHOLE GANG

AND THE MONEY, TOO.

THANKS, CHIEF.
YOUR PLAN WORKED
PERFECTLY.

THEY NEVER
SUSPECTED A THING.

Dr. Claw: I'LL GET YOU
YET, GADGET,

BUT NEXT TIME,

YOU WON'T SUSPECT ANYTHING!

Penny: THANKS TO YOU,
UNCLE GADGET,

THE FUNNY MONEY GANG
IS BACK BEHIND BARS.

THAT POOR MR. SQUINT
COULDN'T SEE A THING
WITHOUT HIS GLASSES.

UNCLE GADGET,
DO YOU THINK YOU MIGHT
NEED GLASSES?

OF COURSE NOT, PENNY.

YOU SHOULD ALWAYS
HAVE A LIGHT ON
WHEN YOU READ.

AH, THAT'S BETTER.

AND YOU SHOULD NEVER
WATCH TELEVISION
IN THE DARK.

YES, PENNY.
OUR EYES ARE
VERY IMPORTANT TO US.

WE SHOULD TAKE
SPECIAL CARE OF THEM.

I STILL THINK
YOU SHOULD HAVE
YOUR EYES EXAMINED.

AND I THOUGHT
I WAS READING LATIN.