In Living Color (1990–1994): Season 2, Episode 14 - Introducing... Fire Marshal Bill - full transcript
♪ YOU CAN DO WHAT YOU WANNA DO ♪
♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪
♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪
♪ YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYIN' ♪
♪ YOU CAN DO WHAT YOU WANNA DO ♪
♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪
♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪
♪ YOU CAN WALK ON THE
MOON FLOAT LIKE A BALLOON ♪
♪ YOU SEE, IT'S NEVER TOO
LATE AND IT'S NEVER TOO SOON ♪
♪ TAKE IT FROM ME IT'S A'IGHT
TO BE ♪ ♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪
♪ AND HOW WOULD YOU FEEL
KNOWING PREJUDICE WAS OBSOLETE ♪
♪ AND ALL MANKIND
DANCED TO THE EXACT BEAT ♪
♪ AND AT NIGHT IT WAS SAFE TO WALK
DOWN THE STREET ♪ ♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪
♪ YOU CAN DO WHAT YOU WANNA DO ♪
♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪
♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪
♪ YOU CAN DO WHAT YOU WANNA DO ♪
♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪
♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪
♪ EVERYBODY HERE
IS EQUALLY KIND ♪
♪ EVERYBODY HERE
IS EQUALLY KIND ♪
♪ EVERYBODY, EVERYBODY
EVERYBODY, EVERYBODY ♪
♪ EVERYBODY HERE IS EQUALLY
KIND ♪ ♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪
♪ WHAT'S MINE IS YOURS
AND WHAT'S YOURS IS MINE ♪
♪ IN LIVING C-C-C-OLOR ♪
♪ YOU CAN DO WHAT YOU WANNA DO ♪
♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪
♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪
♪ YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYIN' ♪
♪ YOU CAN WALK ON THE
MOON FLOAT LIKE A BALLOON ♪
♪ YOU SEE, IT'S NEVER TOO
LATE AND IT'S NEVER TOO SOON ♪
♪ TAKE IT FROM ME IT'S A'IGHT
TO BE ♪ ♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪
♪ YOU CAN DO WHAT YOU
WANNA DO IN LIVING COLOR ♪♪
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,
KEENEN IVORY WAYANS.
THANK YOU.
THANK YOU. WELCOME TO THE SHOW.
I CAME OUT HERE
TONIGHT BECAUSE...
I KNOW YOU'RE SITTING AND
YOU'RE WATCHING AT HOME,
AND SOMEBODY INTRODUCED ME
AND YOU WERE GOIN', "WHO IS THAT?"
SO I'M GOING TO INTRODUCE...
FIRST I'LL REINTRODUCE YOU...
TO ALL THE OTHER FLY GIRLS,
IF YOU DON'T KNOW 'EM BY NOW,
AND THEN I'LL INTRODUCE
YOU TO OUR NEWEST FLY GIRL.
STARTING HERE WITH
DEIDRE, CARI, MICHELLE.
THIS IS OUR NEWEST
FLY GIRL, CARLA GARRIDO.
THAT'S CARRIE ANN AND LISA.
AND OF COURSE YOU GOTTA
SAY HELLO TO THE ONE AND ONLY...
SW1.
SIT TIGHT. WE'LL BE RIGHT
BACK. LOTS OF FUN. GUARANTEED.
♪ YOU CAN DO WHAT YOU WANNA DO ♪
♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪
♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪
♪ YOU CAN WALK ON THE
MOON FLOAT LIKE A BALLOON ♪
♪ YOU SEE, IT'S NEVER TOO LATE
AND IT'S NEVER TOO SOON ♪♪
BOB, YOU THINK YOU COULD TRY TO
CLEAN THE WINDSHIELD? IT'S FILTHY.
OH, HECK!
I JUST CLEANED THESE
WIPERS LAST WEEK.
THERE'S GOT TO BE A BETTER
WAY TO CLEAN A WINDSHIELD.
WHAT WAS THAT?
HOW Y'ALL DOIN'?
HAVIN' A NICE DAY?
YES, FORGET ABOUT
LOUSY WIPER BLADES.
IN FACT, FORGET ABOUT
WINDSHIELD WIPERS ENTIRELY.
INTRODUCING MR. SQUEEGEE.
YOUR WINDSHIELD WILL
SPARKLE FOR JUST PENNIES A DAY.
HE STICKS TO YOUR CAR LIKE GLUE, EVEN
UNDER THE MOST EXTREME DRIVING CONDITIONS.
AND HE'S GUARANTEED
NOT TO SHAKE LOOSE.
LOOK HERE, MAN. I'M JUST TRYING
TO MAKE AN HONEST DOLLAR.
HELP A BROTHER OUT, HOMEY.
HELP ME GET SOMETHING TO EAT, MAN.
HOW ABOUT YOU, MISS LADY?
ALL RIGHT. HAVE A NICE DAY.
WIPERS NEVER WORK
WHEN YOU NEED THEM.
MR. SQUEEGEE WORKS
WHETHER YOU NEED HIM OR NOT.
NOT ONLY ARE WE
CLEANING OUR WINDOWS...
BUT WE FEEL REALLY
GOOD ABOUT IT TOO.
HEY, LOOK HERE, MAN, LET
ME GET A "SAMMICH," MAN.
♪ HE'S MR. SQUEEGEE ♪
GENTLEMEN, WE ARE THE
ONLY STUDIO IN TOWN...
WITHOUT A SINGLE
BLACK FILMMAKER.
THIS IS A A KEY MARKET
THAT WE SIMPLY HAVE TO TAP,
SO TODAY I HAVE
LINED UP MEETINGS...
WITH SOME OF THE HOTTEST YOUNG
BLACK FILMMAKERS IN HOLLYWOOD.
THIS MUST BE THE PLACE!
NOW, WAKE UP THE DOTTED LINE...
'CAUSE THE FUNKATEERS
ARE HERE TO SIGN.
ON THE GOOD FOOT, YOU KNOW?
GENTLEMEN, YOU'RE EARLY.
AND YOU LOOK SWEET
ENOUGH TO EAT, HONEY. OH!
OH, I GET A CAVITY JUST
LOOKIN' AT YOU, SWEET THING!
LOOK HERE, HOME SKILLET, SAVE
SOME FOR DESSERT, YA KNOW?
NOW, YOU MUST BE... FUNKY
FINGER PRODUCCIONES.
I'M CLAVELL. I'M SORRY. I
DON'T SEE YOUR NAME HERE.
AND I'M HOWARD TIBBS III. LET ME
GIVE YOU ONE OF MY BUSINESS CARDS.
YOU KNOW, I'M FRESH OUT. HOWARD?
BAM!
ALL RIGHT, THE NUMBER'S HERE, BUT
YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO READ REAL QUICK,
'CAUSE IT'S GROWING BACK FAST.
- I'M GETTIN' READY TO BUY
ONE OF THEM BLOW OUT KITS.
- BASKETBALL AFRO FOR DAYS!
WELL, IT IS CERTAINLY A
PLEASURE TO MEET YOU BOTH.
LET ME START BY INTRODUCING YOU TO OUR
VICE PRESIDENT OF PUBLICITY, LEE DAGGET.
SAY WHAT? BAM! YOU'RE
JUST THE MAN I WANTED TO SEE.
- YOU ALL RIGHT, HOMEBOY?
- ALL RIGHT.
LOOK HERE. DON'T
PUSH HIM OUT THE CAR.
INTERESTING TITLE. OH KNATS.
NO, NO, NO. YOU GOT THAT
BACKWARDS. LET ME SEE THIS HERE.
THAT'S STANK HO.
SEE, IT'S A LOVE STORY.
IT PICKS UP WHERE
PRETTY WOMAN LEFT OFF,
ONLY THIS TIME, SHE DOES ALL HER
SHOPPING AT FATBURGER, YA KNOW?
DID I MENTION I HAD A
DOCTOR'S APPOINTMENT?
BLOCK 'EM AT THE DOOR, HOMEY!
GENTLEMEN, IT HAS JUST BEEN
A REAL PLEASURE MEETING YOU.
WE AIN'T DONE YET, BIG LEGS!
YOU KNOW, IT'S A
TWO-PICTURE DEAL.
HOWARD, SHOW 'EM THE TRAILER.
I REALLY DON'T THINK
WE HAVE TIME FOR THIS.
WHOO!
BAM!
NOW, YOU SEE, THIS IS A
LITTLE DITTY WE LIKE TO CALL...
DIRTY DANCING WITH WOLVES.
AIN'T NO FUNCTION
AT THIS JUNCTION.
I HAD THE TIME OF MY
LIFE. I'M JUST KIDDIN', Y'ALL.
BUT I NEVER MET
THIS WOLF BEFORE.
LET'S TAKE IT DOWNTOWN,
HOME SKILLET. BREAK IT DOWN.
LOOK HERE, HOMEY, I HATE
TO INTERRUPT THIS THING,
BUT THE COSTUME GOT TO
BE BACK IN JUST ABOUT 15.
AND THE BUS... AND
HERE COMES MY BUS.
THERE GO THE BUS. YOU
GOT CHANGE FOR A DOLLAR?
I GOT IT. LEROY, BRING MY
CAMERA BY LATER, COULD YOU?
NOW HOW DOES THAT
GRAB YOU, MATZO GRIP?
AHH! WELL, YOU KNOW, I THINK
I'VE SEEN JUST ABOUT ENOUGH.
YOUR 12:00 IS HERE, LISA.
DO YOU TWO KNOW YOU LEFT
YOUR SANDWICH CART OUTSIDE?
WELL, AIN'T THAT A
CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIE?
YOU KNOW, I KNEW WE
FORGOT SOMETHING!
HEY, LOOK, Y'ALL! WHO'S HUNGRY?
PLEASE SHOW THESE GENTLEMEN
OUT. DID I MENTION WE ALSO PRODUCED...
MY AFRO'S TOO HIGH
TO BOX WITH GOD?
RIGHT, AND TEENAGE
MUTANT NEGRO TURTLES.
SAY, SAY, SAY, BROTHER!
ISN'T THAT WES UNSELD?
LOVE YOUR WORK, MAN!
CARLA, THE COAST IS CLEAR.
CAN I BORROW, UH, YOU
KNOW, A FEMININE PRODUCT?
- OH, YOU MEAN A TAMPON?
- SHH. YES. HURRY.
THANKS.
THAT TIME OF THE
MONTH, HUH, JOYCE?
THAT'S NOT CLEAVAGE.
IT'S SWELLING.
SUFFERING FROM P.M.S., JOYCE?
SEE? I TOLD YOU
SHE LOOKED BLOATED.
CAN'T SEEM TO DISGUISE THE FACT
THAT IT'S YOUR TIME OF THE MONTH?
WELL, NOW FEMCO BRINGS
YOU FASHION TAMPONS.
STYLISH, COMFORTABLE AND FUN.
THEY COME IN ASSORTED
COLORS AND GO WITH ANY OUTFIT.
OOH, JOYCE, I LOVE
THOSE EARRINGS!
THANKS, CARLA. ACTUALLY,
THEY'RE TAMPONS...
CONVENIENTLY PACKAGED
IN BOXES OF 12, 24 AND 186.
AND THEY'RE SUPER ABSORBENT.
SOMETHING YOU JUST CAN'T
FIND IN OTHER FASHION WEAR.
FASHION TAMPONS. WELL, HONEY, I'M
JUST GONNA GO ON DOWN AND GET ME SOME.
GEE, JOYCE, YOU
LOOK GREAT TODAY.
I LIKE A WOMAN WHO CAN
ACCESSORIZE. REALLY TURNS ME ON.
NICE DRESS, JOYCE.
THIS OLD RAG?
FASHION TAMPONS. BECAUSE AT THAT TIME
OF THE MONTH, YOU WANT TO LOOK GOOD.
AND THERE'S ALSO FASHION
MAXI AND MINI PADS...
FOR THE WOMAN ON THE GO.
FASHION TAMPONS FROM FEMCO.
♪♪
FIGHTING BROKE OUT OVERNIGHT
BETWEEN RIVAL FACTIONS...
HONEY, HOW'S THAT
ROAST COMING ALONG?
IT'S ALMOST READY, DEAR.
GEE, DAD, THAT SOUNDS CLOSE.
DAD, IT STOPPED RIGHT IN FRONT
OF THE HOUSE! WHAT'S GOING ON?
ALL RIGHT, EVERYBODY,
LET'S ALL JUST CALM DOWN.
I'LL TAKE CARE OF THIS.
NICE TO MEET YA, FOLKS.
FIRE MARSHAL BILL HERE.
WON'T YOU COME
IN? DON'T MIND IF I DO.
WOW! A REAL FIREMAN!
THAT'S RIGHT, PRINCESS.
SAY, YOU SURE HAVE A
BEAUTIFUL FAMILY HERE.
WHY, THANK YOU, FIRE MARSHAL
BILL. HOW CAN WE HELP YOU?
WELL, IT'S NATIONAL
FIRE SAFETY WEEK.
I'VE BEEN GOING DOOR TO
DOOR LOOKIN' FOR FIRE HAZARDS.
MIND IF I GIVE YOUR
PLACE A LITTLE INSPECTION?
IT'S FREE.
PLEASE DO.
SON, DOES YOUR FATHER
ALWAYS SMOKE A PIPE?
YES, SIR.
PIPES, CIGARETTES... NUMBER
ONE CAUSE OF DOMESTIC FIRES.
LET ME SHOW YOU
SOMETHING. CERTAINLY.
NOW, SAY ONE NIGHT YOU'RE
DRIFTIN' OFF TO SLEEP ON THE COUCH,
AND THE PIPE FALLS OUT
OF YOUR HAND LIKE THAT.
NOW YOU START DREAMING THAT
YOU'RE HAVIN' A LITTLE BARBECUE,
YOU PULL OUT A CAN
OF LIGHTER FLUID...
BOOM! YOU'RE OFF TO THE RACES.
FIRE! WHAT, THAT?
HEY, FIRE MARSHAL BILL,
YOUR FINGER'S ON FIRE!
THAT'S NOTHIN'. I'VE CAUGHT FIRE SO
MANY TIMES, I CAN'T EVEN FEEL IT ANYMORE.
THE TRICK IS NOT TO PANIC.
FIRE... IS... YOUR FRIEND.
UH-OH! LOOK WHAT I FOUND.
DOWN AT THE STATION, WE
LIKE TO CALL THIS AN OCTOPUS.
LET ME SHOW YOU SOMETHING.
PULL THESE OUT, IT BECOMES
AN EXPOSED ELECTRICAL OUTLET.
LET'S JUST SAY IT'S AFTER DINNER.
YOU'VE GOT A FORK IN YOUR HAND.
SOMEBODY SAYS, "HEY, A GAGGLE
OF GEESE!" WHERE? WHERE?
FIRE MARSHAL BILL, ARE YOU OKAY?
ARE YOU JOKIN'? I'VE BEEN
HIT BY LIGHTNING 19 TIMES.
THAT'S HORRIBLE!
NOT REALLY. I'M
STARTIN' TO ENJOY IT.
OKAY, EVERYBODY,
OUT TO THE KITCHEN!
NOW YOUR KITCHEN AREA IS
AN ALL TOO COMMON LOCALE...
FOR FIRES.
FIRST TIME I SPONTANEOUSLY COMBUSTED
WAS IN A KITCHEN NOT UNLIKE THIS ONE.
IT WAS ONE OF THOSE HOT NIGHTS.
I OPENED THE FRIDGE, AND BOOM!
WENT UP LIKE A POWDER KEG!
GOOD THING I KNEW
HOW TO DROP AND ROLL.
- YOUR HAND'S ON FIRE!
- SO IT IS.
THAT'S A SURE SIGN THAT YOUR GAS
FLOW HASN'T BEEN CALIBRATED PROPERLY.
AHH! NOW...
SAY YOU GOT YOURSELF
A BIT OF A VIRUS.
YOU'RE LOOKIN' FOR
A BOX OF TISSUES,
BUT IT'S NOT THERE
AND IT'S TOO LATE.
NEXT THING YOU KNOW, YOUR GAS
LIGHT GOES OUT ON YOUR NEW GAS RANGE.
SUDDENLY, YOUR HOUSE IS HIT BY A GIANT
METEOR STORM THAT'S TOTALLY UNEXPECTED.
ONE OF THOSE HOT LITTLE BABIES COMES
RIGHT THROUGH THE KITCHEN WINDOW,
YOU JUST HAPPEN TO
BE HOLDING A MATCH.
HEY! YOU'RE NOT GONNA
LIGHT THAT, ARE YOU?
DON'T WORRY, FOLKS.
I'M A FIRE MARSHAL.
IT'S ALL GONE, MOMMY.
IT'LL BE OKAY, SWEETHEART.
EVERYTHING WE HAD WAS IN THERE.
COME ON, FOLKS. LET'S MOVE
ALONG. YOU'LL BE ALL RIGHT.
THEY JUST KEEP BUILDING
'EM HIGHER, DON'T THEY?
HEY! NEIGHBOR!
IS THAT A WOOD SHINGLE
ROOF YOU GOT THERE?
LET ME SHOW YOU SOMETHIN'!
♪♪
♪ IT'S LIKE A HARD CROSS
TO THE BOSS WHEN I TOSS ♪
♪ TOO MUCH KNOWLEDGE
KICKS IN, YOU'RE LOST ♪
♪ IN A SHUFFLE OF
FEAT JINXED TO FIT YA ♪
♪ AND I CONTROL
YOUR MIND LIKE HITLER ♪
♪ YA THINKIN' THIS IS
ONLY THE FIRST VERSE ♪
♪ OF THE FUNK ♪
HEY, YO, CUBE.
WATCH OUT, MOTHERF...
THIS IS THAT GANGSTA STROLL.
♪ DON'T BREAK UP THE
FIGHT LET 'EM RUMBLE ♪
♪ OVER THE YEARS I WATCHED
SOME GO SUPER BAD QUICK ♪
COMPANY, HALT!
OKAY, WOODPECKERS, HERE WE ARE.
AT EASE.
WELCOME, ALL. WELCOME TO HOME
E. CHEESE, WHERE A KID CAN BE A KID,
UNLESS HE GET ON MY DAMN NERVES.
HAVE A SEAT, LITTLE CHILDRENS.
YEAH! YEAH!
THAT'S, UH,
"WOODPECKER," MR. CHEESE.
THAT'S, UH, "CLOWN,"
MR. PECKERWOOD.
DO YOU MIND IF I, UH,
IF I USE A CHECK FOR THIS?
OH, YOU WANT TO PAY ME WITH
A CHECK, HUH? MM-HMM, YEAH.
AND HAVE ME STAND IN LINE IN
SOME DAMN BANK IN A CLOWN OUTFIT,
DEGRADING AND SHAMING MYSELF
TO CASH YOUR LITTLE PEANUTS, HUH?
I DON'T THINK SO.
HOMEY DON'T PLAY THAT.
SEE? THE LITTLE CHICKADEES
IS HAVING FUN ALREADY.
I SUPPOSE YOU'RE RIGHT. OKAY!
WOODPECKERS!
WE RENDEZVOUS
HERE AT 1400 HOURS.
WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?
- WOODPECKER CALL, SIR.
- YEAH, ALL RIGHT.
WELL, NOW THAT MR. UPTIGHT-AND-WHITE
IS GONE, LET'S HAVE SOME FUN.
YEAH! WHO'S THE
LITTLE BIRTHDAY CHILD?
I AM, HOMEY! I AM!
OKAY. THEN YOU GET TO WEAR THIS.
OH! OOH!
THE BIRTHDAY HAT. THANK YOU.
SO WHAT DO YOU WANNA
DO FIRST? OPEN MY PRESENTS!
OH, YEAH, RIGHT. OPEN
UP ALL YOUR PRESENTS...
WHILE THE REST OF US STAND HERE
EMPTY-HANDED, WATCHING YOU HAVE FUN, HUH?
YEAH!
I DON'T THINK SO.
HOMEY DON'T PLAY THAT.
YOU OPEN THAT CRAP WHEN
YOU GET HOME, GOLDILOCKS.
OKAY, WHAT'S NEXT? OH,
LET'S PLAY SOME GAMES, HOMEY.
YEAH! LET'S PLAY SOME GAMES!
OOH! YOU WANT TO
PLAY SOME GAMES, HUH?
YEAH! YEAH!
OKAY, LET'S PLAY "HOMEY SAYS."
YEAH! YEAH!
OKAY, HOMEY SAYS DO LIKE THIS.
AND THEN HOMEY SAYS
PUT YOUR HANDS LIKE THIS.
AND THEN HOMEY SAYS
CLOSE YOUR EYES LIKE THIS.
THE END! WASN'T
THAT FUN, CHILDRENS?
HOW ABOUT ANOTHER GAME?
LET'S PLAY A GAME OF CARDS.
ANY VOLUNTEERS? ME, ME, ME!
OKAY, COME WITH ME, SON.
WHAT KIND OF CARDS ARE THESE?
IT'S CALLED SOLITAIRE...
CONFINEMENT.
THAT'S WHAT YOU GET
FOR VOLUNTEERING, STUPID.
OKAY, Y'ALL WANT
BIRTHDAY CAKE? YEAH!
WE AIN'T GOT NONE.
WE GOT CHEESE.
GOVERNMENT CHEESE.
FRESH BAKED THIS MORNING.
LET'S SING THE "HAPPY
BIRTHDAY" SONG.
♪ HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU ♪♪
OKAY, THAT'S ENOUGH!
WHO WANTS TO CUT THE CHEESE?
ALL RIGHT. I'LL JUST
SAVE IT FOR MY 2:00 PARTY.
OKAY, CHILDRENS, LINE UP.
IT'S TIME TO SING THE HOME
E. CHEESE WIZ KIDS SONG.
COME ON OUT OF JAIL, SILLY BOY.
I'LL HIT YOU WHEN
I WANNA HIT YOU.
COME ON. LINE UP. LET'S
KEEP IT FUN, CHILDRENS.
YEAH!
OKAY, NOW, SING AFTER ME.
♪ I'M A HOMEY WIZ
KID LOOK AT ME ♪
♪ I'M A HOMEY WIZ
KID LOOK AT ME ♪
♪ I RUN AND JUMP AND PLAY
ALL DAY BECAUSE I'M FREE ♪
♪ I RUN AND JUMP AND PLAY
ALL DAY BECAUSE I'M FREE ♪
♪ I WISH EVERYBODY
I WISH EVERYBODY ♪
♪ I WISH EVERYBODY
COULD BE LIKE ME ♪
♪ I WISH EVERYBODY
I WISH EVERYBODY ♪
♪ I WISH EVERYBODY
COULD BE LIKE ME ♪
♪ INSTEAD OF DOWNTRODDEN PEOPLE
IN MR. ESTABLISHMENT'S SOCIETY ♪
♪ LIVING LIKE DOGS WHILE
THEY TRY TO KEEP YOU DOWN ♪
♪ WITH OPPRESSION AND
AGGRESSION AND CABLE TV ♪
♪ WITH PRISON AND LOVIN'
IT FOR JUSTICE FOR ALL ♪♪
I SAID SING THE DAMN SONG!
♪♪
OKAY, THAT'S ENOUGH, THAT'S
ENOUGH, THAT'S ENOUGH.
OH! PASS THOSE OUT.
THANKS, HOMEY! I DUB THEE
HOME E. CHEESE WIZ KIDS.
I CAN'T BREATHE. THANKS, HOMEY.
HOMEY! HOMEY!
HOMEY! HOMEY! HOMEY! HOMEY!
HOMEY! HOMEY! HOMEY! HOMEY!
HOMEY! HOMEY! HOMEY! HOMEY!
MY GOD! WHAT HAVE YOU
DONE TO THE CHILDREN?
I'VE SHOWED THEM THE LIGHT.
OKAY, KIDS, LET'S
GO. FUN'S OVER.
ARM YOURSELVES, HOMETTES!
AS YOUR WOODPECKER
LEADER, I AM WARNING YOU.
I'M TELLING YOU TO TAKE
THOSE SOCKS, PUT THEM AWAY...
AND COME WITH ME TO
HEADQUARTERS N-O-W.
OH, YEAH? GO BACK
TO HEADQUARTERS?
YEAH, SO YOU CAN
INSPECT OUR BUNKS?
YEAH, AND TAKE AWAY OUR CANDY?
YEAH, AND MAKE US EAT LIMA BEANS?
WE DON'T THINK SO.
HOME E. CHEESE WIZ
KIDS DON'T PLAY THAT!
HEY, UH, HOMEY, CAN I
GET MY PRESENTS BACK?
OH, YOU WANT ALL YOUR
GIFTS BACK? YES, PLEASE.
I DON'T THINK SO.
HMM. I WONDER WHERE THAT
2:00 GROUP OF CHILDREN IS.
THANK YOU. THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
BEFORE WE GO, I'D JUST LIKE TO INTRODUCE
YOU TO OUR NEWEST FLY GIRL, CARLA GARRIDO.
ALL RIGHT! ALL RIGHT!
SAY GOOD NIGHT,
CARLA. GOOD NIGHT!
SAY, "SEE YOU NEXT
WEEK." SEE YOU NEXT WEEK.
SHE'S GONNA WORK
OUT FINE. SEE YOU LATER.
♪ YOU CAN DO WHAT
YOU WANNA DO ♪♪
♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪
♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪
♪ YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYIN' ♪
♪ YOU CAN DO WHAT YOU WANNA DO ♪
♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪
♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪
♪ YOU CAN WALK ON THE
MOON FLOAT LIKE A BALLOON ♪
♪ YOU SEE, IT'S NEVER TOO
LATE AND IT'S NEVER TOO SOON ♪
♪ TAKE IT FROM ME IT'S A'IGHT
TO BE ♪ ♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪
♪ AND HOW WOULD YOU FEEL
KNOWING PREJUDICE WAS OBSOLETE ♪
♪ AND ALL MANKIND
DANCED TO THE EXACT BEAT ♪
♪ AND AT NIGHT IT WAS SAFE TO WALK
DOWN THE STREET ♪ ♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪
♪ YOU CAN DO WHAT YOU WANNA DO ♪
♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪
♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪
♪ YOU CAN DO WHAT YOU WANNA DO ♪
♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪
♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪
♪ EVERYBODY HERE
IS EQUALLY KIND ♪
♪ EVERYBODY HERE
IS EQUALLY KIND ♪
♪ EVERYBODY, EVERYBODY
EVERYBODY, EVERYBODY ♪
♪ EVERYBODY HERE IS EQUALLY
KIND ♪ ♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪
♪ WHAT'S MINE IS YOURS
AND WHAT'S YOURS IS MINE ♪
♪ IN LIVING C-C-C-OLOR ♪
♪ YOU CAN DO WHAT YOU WANNA DO ♪
♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪
♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪
♪ YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYIN' ♪
♪ YOU CAN WALK ON THE
MOON FLOAT LIKE A BALLOON ♪
♪ YOU SEE, IT'S NEVER TOO
LATE AND IT'S NEVER TOO SOON ♪
♪ TAKE IT FROM ME IT'S A'IGHT
TO BE ♪ ♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪
♪ YOU CAN DO WHAT YOU
WANNA DO IN LIVING COLOR ♪♪
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,
KEENEN IVORY WAYANS.
THANK YOU.
THANK YOU. WELCOME TO THE SHOW.
I CAME OUT HERE
TONIGHT BECAUSE...
I KNOW YOU'RE SITTING AND
YOU'RE WATCHING AT HOME,
AND SOMEBODY INTRODUCED ME
AND YOU WERE GOIN', "WHO IS THAT?"
SO I'M GOING TO INTRODUCE...
FIRST I'LL REINTRODUCE YOU...
TO ALL THE OTHER FLY GIRLS,
IF YOU DON'T KNOW 'EM BY NOW,
AND THEN I'LL INTRODUCE
YOU TO OUR NEWEST FLY GIRL.
STARTING HERE WITH
DEIDRE, CARI, MICHELLE.
THIS IS OUR NEWEST
FLY GIRL, CARLA GARRIDO.
THAT'S CARRIE ANN AND LISA.
AND OF COURSE YOU GOTTA
SAY HELLO TO THE ONE AND ONLY...
SW1.
SIT TIGHT. WE'LL BE RIGHT
BACK. LOTS OF FUN. GUARANTEED.
♪ YOU CAN DO WHAT YOU WANNA DO ♪
♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪
♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪
♪ YOU CAN WALK ON THE
MOON FLOAT LIKE A BALLOON ♪
♪ YOU SEE, IT'S NEVER TOO LATE
AND IT'S NEVER TOO SOON ♪♪
BOB, YOU THINK YOU COULD TRY TO
CLEAN THE WINDSHIELD? IT'S FILTHY.
OH, HECK!
I JUST CLEANED THESE
WIPERS LAST WEEK.
THERE'S GOT TO BE A BETTER
WAY TO CLEAN A WINDSHIELD.
WHAT WAS THAT?
HOW Y'ALL DOIN'?
HAVIN' A NICE DAY?
YES, FORGET ABOUT
LOUSY WIPER BLADES.
IN FACT, FORGET ABOUT
WINDSHIELD WIPERS ENTIRELY.
INTRODUCING MR. SQUEEGEE.
YOUR WINDSHIELD WILL
SPARKLE FOR JUST PENNIES A DAY.
HE STICKS TO YOUR CAR LIKE GLUE, EVEN
UNDER THE MOST EXTREME DRIVING CONDITIONS.
AND HE'S GUARANTEED
NOT TO SHAKE LOOSE.
LOOK HERE, MAN. I'M JUST TRYING
TO MAKE AN HONEST DOLLAR.
HELP A BROTHER OUT, HOMEY.
HELP ME GET SOMETHING TO EAT, MAN.
HOW ABOUT YOU, MISS LADY?
ALL RIGHT. HAVE A NICE DAY.
WIPERS NEVER WORK
WHEN YOU NEED THEM.
MR. SQUEEGEE WORKS
WHETHER YOU NEED HIM OR NOT.
NOT ONLY ARE WE
CLEANING OUR WINDOWS...
BUT WE FEEL REALLY
GOOD ABOUT IT TOO.
HEY, LOOK HERE, MAN, LET
ME GET A "SAMMICH," MAN.
♪ HE'S MR. SQUEEGEE ♪
GENTLEMEN, WE ARE THE
ONLY STUDIO IN TOWN...
WITHOUT A SINGLE
BLACK FILMMAKER.
THIS IS A A KEY MARKET
THAT WE SIMPLY HAVE TO TAP,
SO TODAY I HAVE
LINED UP MEETINGS...
WITH SOME OF THE HOTTEST YOUNG
BLACK FILMMAKERS IN HOLLYWOOD.
THIS MUST BE THE PLACE!
NOW, WAKE UP THE DOTTED LINE...
'CAUSE THE FUNKATEERS
ARE HERE TO SIGN.
ON THE GOOD FOOT, YOU KNOW?
GENTLEMEN, YOU'RE EARLY.
AND YOU LOOK SWEET
ENOUGH TO EAT, HONEY. OH!
OH, I GET A CAVITY JUST
LOOKIN' AT YOU, SWEET THING!
LOOK HERE, HOME SKILLET, SAVE
SOME FOR DESSERT, YA KNOW?
NOW, YOU MUST BE... FUNKY
FINGER PRODUCCIONES.
I'M CLAVELL. I'M SORRY. I
DON'T SEE YOUR NAME HERE.
AND I'M HOWARD TIBBS III. LET ME
GIVE YOU ONE OF MY BUSINESS CARDS.
YOU KNOW, I'M FRESH OUT. HOWARD?
BAM!
ALL RIGHT, THE NUMBER'S HERE, BUT
YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO READ REAL QUICK,
'CAUSE IT'S GROWING BACK FAST.
- I'M GETTIN' READY TO BUY
ONE OF THEM BLOW OUT KITS.
- BASKETBALL AFRO FOR DAYS!
WELL, IT IS CERTAINLY A
PLEASURE TO MEET YOU BOTH.
LET ME START BY INTRODUCING YOU TO OUR
VICE PRESIDENT OF PUBLICITY, LEE DAGGET.
SAY WHAT? BAM! YOU'RE
JUST THE MAN I WANTED TO SEE.
- YOU ALL RIGHT, HOMEBOY?
- ALL RIGHT.
LOOK HERE. DON'T
PUSH HIM OUT THE CAR.
INTERESTING TITLE. OH KNATS.
NO, NO, NO. YOU GOT THAT
BACKWARDS. LET ME SEE THIS HERE.
THAT'S STANK HO.
SEE, IT'S A LOVE STORY.
IT PICKS UP WHERE
PRETTY WOMAN LEFT OFF,
ONLY THIS TIME, SHE DOES ALL HER
SHOPPING AT FATBURGER, YA KNOW?
DID I MENTION I HAD A
DOCTOR'S APPOINTMENT?
BLOCK 'EM AT THE DOOR, HOMEY!
GENTLEMEN, IT HAS JUST BEEN
A REAL PLEASURE MEETING YOU.
WE AIN'T DONE YET, BIG LEGS!
YOU KNOW, IT'S A
TWO-PICTURE DEAL.
HOWARD, SHOW 'EM THE TRAILER.
I REALLY DON'T THINK
WE HAVE TIME FOR THIS.
WHOO!
BAM!
NOW, YOU SEE, THIS IS A
LITTLE DITTY WE LIKE TO CALL...
DIRTY DANCING WITH WOLVES.
AIN'T NO FUNCTION
AT THIS JUNCTION.
I HAD THE TIME OF MY
LIFE. I'M JUST KIDDIN', Y'ALL.
BUT I NEVER MET
THIS WOLF BEFORE.
LET'S TAKE IT DOWNTOWN,
HOME SKILLET. BREAK IT DOWN.
LOOK HERE, HOMEY, I HATE
TO INTERRUPT THIS THING,
BUT THE COSTUME GOT TO
BE BACK IN JUST ABOUT 15.
AND THE BUS... AND
HERE COMES MY BUS.
THERE GO THE BUS. YOU
GOT CHANGE FOR A DOLLAR?
I GOT IT. LEROY, BRING MY
CAMERA BY LATER, COULD YOU?
NOW HOW DOES THAT
GRAB YOU, MATZO GRIP?
AHH! WELL, YOU KNOW, I THINK
I'VE SEEN JUST ABOUT ENOUGH.
YOUR 12:00 IS HERE, LISA.
DO YOU TWO KNOW YOU LEFT
YOUR SANDWICH CART OUTSIDE?
WELL, AIN'T THAT A
CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIE?
YOU KNOW, I KNEW WE
FORGOT SOMETHING!
HEY, LOOK, Y'ALL! WHO'S HUNGRY?
PLEASE SHOW THESE GENTLEMEN
OUT. DID I MENTION WE ALSO PRODUCED...
MY AFRO'S TOO HIGH
TO BOX WITH GOD?
RIGHT, AND TEENAGE
MUTANT NEGRO TURTLES.
SAY, SAY, SAY, BROTHER!
ISN'T THAT WES UNSELD?
LOVE YOUR WORK, MAN!
CARLA, THE COAST IS CLEAR.
CAN I BORROW, UH, YOU
KNOW, A FEMININE PRODUCT?
- OH, YOU MEAN A TAMPON?
- SHH. YES. HURRY.
THANKS.
THAT TIME OF THE
MONTH, HUH, JOYCE?
THAT'S NOT CLEAVAGE.
IT'S SWELLING.
SUFFERING FROM P.M.S., JOYCE?
SEE? I TOLD YOU
SHE LOOKED BLOATED.
CAN'T SEEM TO DISGUISE THE FACT
THAT IT'S YOUR TIME OF THE MONTH?
WELL, NOW FEMCO BRINGS
YOU FASHION TAMPONS.
STYLISH, COMFORTABLE AND FUN.
THEY COME IN ASSORTED
COLORS AND GO WITH ANY OUTFIT.
OOH, JOYCE, I LOVE
THOSE EARRINGS!
THANKS, CARLA. ACTUALLY,
THEY'RE TAMPONS...
CONVENIENTLY PACKAGED
IN BOXES OF 12, 24 AND 186.
AND THEY'RE SUPER ABSORBENT.
SOMETHING YOU JUST CAN'T
FIND IN OTHER FASHION WEAR.
FASHION TAMPONS. WELL, HONEY, I'M
JUST GONNA GO ON DOWN AND GET ME SOME.
GEE, JOYCE, YOU
LOOK GREAT TODAY.
I LIKE A WOMAN WHO CAN
ACCESSORIZE. REALLY TURNS ME ON.
NICE DRESS, JOYCE.
THIS OLD RAG?
FASHION TAMPONS. BECAUSE AT THAT TIME
OF THE MONTH, YOU WANT TO LOOK GOOD.
AND THERE'S ALSO FASHION
MAXI AND MINI PADS...
FOR THE WOMAN ON THE GO.
FASHION TAMPONS FROM FEMCO.
♪♪
FIGHTING BROKE OUT OVERNIGHT
BETWEEN RIVAL FACTIONS...
HONEY, HOW'S THAT
ROAST COMING ALONG?
IT'S ALMOST READY, DEAR.
GEE, DAD, THAT SOUNDS CLOSE.
DAD, IT STOPPED RIGHT IN FRONT
OF THE HOUSE! WHAT'S GOING ON?
ALL RIGHT, EVERYBODY,
LET'S ALL JUST CALM DOWN.
I'LL TAKE CARE OF THIS.
NICE TO MEET YA, FOLKS.
FIRE MARSHAL BILL HERE.
WON'T YOU COME
IN? DON'T MIND IF I DO.
WOW! A REAL FIREMAN!
THAT'S RIGHT, PRINCESS.
SAY, YOU SURE HAVE A
BEAUTIFUL FAMILY HERE.
WHY, THANK YOU, FIRE MARSHAL
BILL. HOW CAN WE HELP YOU?
WELL, IT'S NATIONAL
FIRE SAFETY WEEK.
I'VE BEEN GOING DOOR TO
DOOR LOOKIN' FOR FIRE HAZARDS.
MIND IF I GIVE YOUR
PLACE A LITTLE INSPECTION?
IT'S FREE.
PLEASE DO.
SON, DOES YOUR FATHER
ALWAYS SMOKE A PIPE?
YES, SIR.
PIPES, CIGARETTES... NUMBER
ONE CAUSE OF DOMESTIC FIRES.
LET ME SHOW YOU
SOMETHING. CERTAINLY.
NOW, SAY ONE NIGHT YOU'RE
DRIFTIN' OFF TO SLEEP ON THE COUCH,
AND THE PIPE FALLS OUT
OF YOUR HAND LIKE THAT.
NOW YOU START DREAMING THAT
YOU'RE HAVIN' A LITTLE BARBECUE,
YOU PULL OUT A CAN
OF LIGHTER FLUID...
BOOM! YOU'RE OFF TO THE RACES.
FIRE! WHAT, THAT?
HEY, FIRE MARSHAL BILL,
YOUR FINGER'S ON FIRE!
THAT'S NOTHIN'. I'VE CAUGHT FIRE SO
MANY TIMES, I CAN'T EVEN FEEL IT ANYMORE.
THE TRICK IS NOT TO PANIC.
FIRE... IS... YOUR FRIEND.
UH-OH! LOOK WHAT I FOUND.
DOWN AT THE STATION, WE
LIKE TO CALL THIS AN OCTOPUS.
LET ME SHOW YOU SOMETHING.
PULL THESE OUT, IT BECOMES
AN EXPOSED ELECTRICAL OUTLET.
LET'S JUST SAY IT'S AFTER DINNER.
YOU'VE GOT A FORK IN YOUR HAND.
SOMEBODY SAYS, "HEY, A GAGGLE
OF GEESE!" WHERE? WHERE?
FIRE MARSHAL BILL, ARE YOU OKAY?
ARE YOU JOKIN'? I'VE BEEN
HIT BY LIGHTNING 19 TIMES.
THAT'S HORRIBLE!
NOT REALLY. I'M
STARTIN' TO ENJOY IT.
OKAY, EVERYBODY,
OUT TO THE KITCHEN!
NOW YOUR KITCHEN AREA IS
AN ALL TOO COMMON LOCALE...
FOR FIRES.
FIRST TIME I SPONTANEOUSLY COMBUSTED
WAS IN A KITCHEN NOT UNLIKE THIS ONE.
IT WAS ONE OF THOSE HOT NIGHTS.
I OPENED THE FRIDGE, AND BOOM!
WENT UP LIKE A POWDER KEG!
GOOD THING I KNEW
HOW TO DROP AND ROLL.
- YOUR HAND'S ON FIRE!
- SO IT IS.
THAT'S A SURE SIGN THAT YOUR GAS
FLOW HASN'T BEEN CALIBRATED PROPERLY.
AHH! NOW...
SAY YOU GOT YOURSELF
A BIT OF A VIRUS.
YOU'RE LOOKIN' FOR
A BOX OF TISSUES,
BUT IT'S NOT THERE
AND IT'S TOO LATE.
NEXT THING YOU KNOW, YOUR GAS
LIGHT GOES OUT ON YOUR NEW GAS RANGE.
SUDDENLY, YOUR HOUSE IS HIT BY A GIANT
METEOR STORM THAT'S TOTALLY UNEXPECTED.
ONE OF THOSE HOT LITTLE BABIES COMES
RIGHT THROUGH THE KITCHEN WINDOW,
YOU JUST HAPPEN TO
BE HOLDING A MATCH.
HEY! YOU'RE NOT GONNA
LIGHT THAT, ARE YOU?
DON'T WORRY, FOLKS.
I'M A FIRE MARSHAL.
IT'S ALL GONE, MOMMY.
IT'LL BE OKAY, SWEETHEART.
EVERYTHING WE HAD WAS IN THERE.
COME ON, FOLKS. LET'S MOVE
ALONG. YOU'LL BE ALL RIGHT.
THEY JUST KEEP BUILDING
'EM HIGHER, DON'T THEY?
HEY! NEIGHBOR!
IS THAT A WOOD SHINGLE
ROOF YOU GOT THERE?
LET ME SHOW YOU SOMETHIN'!
♪♪
♪ IT'S LIKE A HARD CROSS
TO THE BOSS WHEN I TOSS ♪
♪ TOO MUCH KNOWLEDGE
KICKS IN, YOU'RE LOST ♪
♪ IN A SHUFFLE OF
FEAT JINXED TO FIT YA ♪
♪ AND I CONTROL
YOUR MIND LIKE HITLER ♪
♪ YA THINKIN' THIS IS
ONLY THE FIRST VERSE ♪
♪ OF THE FUNK ♪
HEY, YO, CUBE.
WATCH OUT, MOTHERF...
THIS IS THAT GANGSTA STROLL.
♪ DON'T BREAK UP THE
FIGHT LET 'EM RUMBLE ♪
♪ OVER THE YEARS I WATCHED
SOME GO SUPER BAD QUICK ♪
COMPANY, HALT!
OKAY, WOODPECKERS, HERE WE ARE.
AT EASE.
WELCOME, ALL. WELCOME TO HOME
E. CHEESE, WHERE A KID CAN BE A KID,
UNLESS HE GET ON MY DAMN NERVES.
HAVE A SEAT, LITTLE CHILDRENS.
YEAH! YEAH!
THAT'S, UH,
"WOODPECKER," MR. CHEESE.
THAT'S, UH, "CLOWN,"
MR. PECKERWOOD.
DO YOU MIND IF I, UH,
IF I USE A CHECK FOR THIS?
OH, YOU WANT TO PAY ME WITH
A CHECK, HUH? MM-HMM, YEAH.
AND HAVE ME STAND IN LINE IN
SOME DAMN BANK IN A CLOWN OUTFIT,
DEGRADING AND SHAMING MYSELF
TO CASH YOUR LITTLE PEANUTS, HUH?
I DON'T THINK SO.
HOMEY DON'T PLAY THAT.
SEE? THE LITTLE CHICKADEES
IS HAVING FUN ALREADY.
I SUPPOSE YOU'RE RIGHT. OKAY!
WOODPECKERS!
WE RENDEZVOUS
HERE AT 1400 HOURS.
WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?
- WOODPECKER CALL, SIR.
- YEAH, ALL RIGHT.
WELL, NOW THAT MR. UPTIGHT-AND-WHITE
IS GONE, LET'S HAVE SOME FUN.
YEAH! WHO'S THE
LITTLE BIRTHDAY CHILD?
I AM, HOMEY! I AM!
OKAY. THEN YOU GET TO WEAR THIS.
OH! OOH!
THE BIRTHDAY HAT. THANK YOU.
SO WHAT DO YOU WANNA
DO FIRST? OPEN MY PRESENTS!
OH, YEAH, RIGHT. OPEN
UP ALL YOUR PRESENTS...
WHILE THE REST OF US STAND HERE
EMPTY-HANDED, WATCHING YOU HAVE FUN, HUH?
YEAH!
I DON'T THINK SO.
HOMEY DON'T PLAY THAT.
YOU OPEN THAT CRAP WHEN
YOU GET HOME, GOLDILOCKS.
OKAY, WHAT'S NEXT? OH,
LET'S PLAY SOME GAMES, HOMEY.
YEAH! LET'S PLAY SOME GAMES!
OOH! YOU WANT TO
PLAY SOME GAMES, HUH?
YEAH! YEAH!
OKAY, LET'S PLAY "HOMEY SAYS."
YEAH! YEAH!
OKAY, HOMEY SAYS DO LIKE THIS.
AND THEN HOMEY SAYS
PUT YOUR HANDS LIKE THIS.
AND THEN HOMEY SAYS
CLOSE YOUR EYES LIKE THIS.
THE END! WASN'T
THAT FUN, CHILDRENS?
HOW ABOUT ANOTHER GAME?
LET'S PLAY A GAME OF CARDS.
ANY VOLUNTEERS? ME, ME, ME!
OKAY, COME WITH ME, SON.
WHAT KIND OF CARDS ARE THESE?
IT'S CALLED SOLITAIRE...
CONFINEMENT.
THAT'S WHAT YOU GET
FOR VOLUNTEERING, STUPID.
OKAY, Y'ALL WANT
BIRTHDAY CAKE? YEAH!
WE AIN'T GOT NONE.
WE GOT CHEESE.
GOVERNMENT CHEESE.
FRESH BAKED THIS MORNING.
LET'S SING THE "HAPPY
BIRTHDAY" SONG.
♪ HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU ♪♪
OKAY, THAT'S ENOUGH!
WHO WANTS TO CUT THE CHEESE?
ALL RIGHT. I'LL JUST
SAVE IT FOR MY 2:00 PARTY.
OKAY, CHILDRENS, LINE UP.
IT'S TIME TO SING THE HOME
E. CHEESE WIZ KIDS SONG.
COME ON OUT OF JAIL, SILLY BOY.
I'LL HIT YOU WHEN
I WANNA HIT YOU.
COME ON. LINE UP. LET'S
KEEP IT FUN, CHILDRENS.
YEAH!
OKAY, NOW, SING AFTER ME.
♪ I'M A HOMEY WIZ
KID LOOK AT ME ♪
♪ I'M A HOMEY WIZ
KID LOOK AT ME ♪
♪ I RUN AND JUMP AND PLAY
ALL DAY BECAUSE I'M FREE ♪
♪ I RUN AND JUMP AND PLAY
ALL DAY BECAUSE I'M FREE ♪
♪ I WISH EVERYBODY
I WISH EVERYBODY ♪
♪ I WISH EVERYBODY
COULD BE LIKE ME ♪
♪ I WISH EVERYBODY
I WISH EVERYBODY ♪
♪ I WISH EVERYBODY
COULD BE LIKE ME ♪
♪ INSTEAD OF DOWNTRODDEN PEOPLE
IN MR. ESTABLISHMENT'S SOCIETY ♪
♪ LIVING LIKE DOGS WHILE
THEY TRY TO KEEP YOU DOWN ♪
♪ WITH OPPRESSION AND
AGGRESSION AND CABLE TV ♪
♪ WITH PRISON AND LOVIN'
IT FOR JUSTICE FOR ALL ♪♪
I SAID SING THE DAMN SONG!
♪♪
OKAY, THAT'S ENOUGH, THAT'S
ENOUGH, THAT'S ENOUGH.
OH! PASS THOSE OUT.
THANKS, HOMEY! I DUB THEE
HOME E. CHEESE WIZ KIDS.
I CAN'T BREATHE. THANKS, HOMEY.
HOMEY! HOMEY!
HOMEY! HOMEY! HOMEY! HOMEY!
HOMEY! HOMEY! HOMEY! HOMEY!
HOMEY! HOMEY! HOMEY! HOMEY!
MY GOD! WHAT HAVE YOU
DONE TO THE CHILDREN?
I'VE SHOWED THEM THE LIGHT.
OKAY, KIDS, LET'S
GO. FUN'S OVER.
ARM YOURSELVES, HOMETTES!
AS YOUR WOODPECKER
LEADER, I AM WARNING YOU.
I'M TELLING YOU TO TAKE
THOSE SOCKS, PUT THEM AWAY...
AND COME WITH ME TO
HEADQUARTERS N-O-W.
OH, YEAH? GO BACK
TO HEADQUARTERS?
YEAH, SO YOU CAN
INSPECT OUR BUNKS?
YEAH, AND TAKE AWAY OUR CANDY?
YEAH, AND MAKE US EAT LIMA BEANS?
WE DON'T THINK SO.
HOME E. CHEESE WIZ
KIDS DON'T PLAY THAT!
HEY, UH, HOMEY, CAN I
GET MY PRESENTS BACK?
OH, YOU WANT ALL YOUR
GIFTS BACK? YES, PLEASE.
I DON'T THINK SO.
HMM. I WONDER WHERE THAT
2:00 GROUP OF CHILDREN IS.
THANK YOU. THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
BEFORE WE GO, I'D JUST LIKE TO INTRODUCE
YOU TO OUR NEWEST FLY GIRL, CARLA GARRIDO.
ALL RIGHT! ALL RIGHT!
SAY GOOD NIGHT,
CARLA. GOOD NIGHT!
SAY, "SEE YOU NEXT
WEEK." SEE YOU NEXT WEEK.
SHE'S GONNA WORK
OUT FINE. SEE YOU LATER.
♪ YOU CAN DO WHAT
YOU WANNA DO ♪♪