In Living Color (1990–1994): Season 1, Episode 8 - Endangered Species - full transcript

♪ YOU CAN DO WHAT YOU WANNA DO ♪

♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪

♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪
♪ YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYIN' ♪

♪ YOU CAN DO WHAT YOU WANNA DO ♪

♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪

♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪

♪ YOU CAN WALK ON THE
MOON FLOAT LIKE A BALLOON ♪

♪ IT'S NEVER TOO LATE
AND IT'S NEVER TOO SOON ♪

♪ TAKE IT FROM ME
IT'S A'IGHT TO BE ♪

♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪

♪ HOW WOULD YOU FEEL KNOWING
PREJUDICE WAS OBSOLETE ♪



♪ AND ALL MANKIND
DANCED TO THE EXACT BEAT ♪

♪ AND AT NIGHT IT WAS SAFE
TO WALK DOWN THE STREET ♪

♪ YOU CAN DO WHAT YOU WANNA DO ♪

♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪

♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪

♪ YOU CAN DO WHAT YOU WANNA DO ♪

♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪

♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪

♪ EVERYBODY HERE
IS EQUALLY KIND ♪

♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪

♪ WHAT'S MINE IS YOURS
AND WHAT'S YOURS IS MINE ♪

♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪

♪ HOW WOULD YOU FEEL KNOWING
EVERYBODY WAS YOUR FRIEND ♪

♪ FROM THIN TO THICK AND
THROUGH THICK AND THIN ♪



♪ AND EGOTISTICAL
TRIPS WAS PUT TO AN END ♪

♪ YOU CAN DO WHAT YOU WANNA DO ♪

♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪

♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪

♪ YOU CAN WALK ON THE
MOON FLOAT LIKE A BALLOON ♪

♪ IT'S NEVER TOO LATE
AND IT'S NEVER TOO SOON ♪

♪ TAKE IT FROM ME
IT'S A'IGHT TO BE ♪

♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪

♪ HOW WOULD YOU FEEL KNOWING
PREJUDICE WAS OBSOLETE ♪

♪ AND ALL MANKIND
DANCED TO THE EXACT BEAT ♪

♪ AND AT NIGHT IT WAS SAFE
TO WALK DOWN THE STREET ♪

♪ YOU CAN DO WHAT YOU WANNA DO ♪

♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪♪

[Applause, Cheering]

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,
KEEMY, UH, EBONY, UH, TOWNSEND.

[Cheering, Applause]

UH, WHO THE HELL ARE YOU, MAN?

WHO'S ASKIN'?

THANKS FOR STANDING
IN FOR ME, DADDY.

YOU GOT IT, BABY.
DON'T SHAKE IT TOO HARD.

I'LL SEE YOU LATER, KEEMY.

HOW ABOUT A HAND FOR MY FLY GUY.

ALL RIGHT. HELLO. THANK
YOU. WELCOME TO THE PARTY.

I'M KEENEN IVORY WAYANS.
THIS IS IN LIVING COLOR.

GOOD TO HAVE Y'ALL HERE
TONIGHT. YEAH. [Applause]

WE GOT A FUN SHOW LINED UP
AS USUAL, SO SIT BACK, RELAX.

BEFORE I GET STARTED, SAY
HELLO TO MY D.J... S.W. ONE.

[Cheering, Applause]

YOU ALL NEED TO STOP THAT,
'CAUSE I GOTTA TAKE HIM HOME LATER...

AND HE'S GONNA BE SOUPED
UP AND JUST NOT GOOD.

SAY HELLO TO THE FLY GIRLS,
STARTING OVER HERE WITH DEE,

CARRIE ANN, LISA,
MICHELLE AND CARI.

YEAH.

WE'LL BE BACK IN A FEW.
YO, BIG HEAD, KICK IT.

♪ YOU CAN DO WHAT YOU WANNA DO ♪

♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪
♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪♪

♪♪ ["Hail To The Chief"]

[Man] LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, THE
PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES,

JESSE JACKSON.

GOOD EVENIN' AND THANK YA,

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN
OF THE PRESS,

MY FELLOW AMERICANS,
BROTHERS AND SISTERS.

WELCOME TO THE LAST PRESS
CONFERENCE OF MY PRESIDENCY.

NOW, FEW PEOPLE
THOUGHT EIGHT YEARS AGO...

THAT A POOR BOY
FROM THE CAROLINAS...

COULD GO FROM THE
OUTHOUSE TO THE WHITE HOUSE.

FROM EATIN' IN CHEAP JOINTS
TO TALKIN' TO JOINT CHIEFS.

FROM NIBBLIN' ON JALAPEÑOS,
TO MEETIN' WITH THE FILIPINOS.

YEAH.

HIP-HOP, YOU DON'T STOP ROCKIN'
TO THE BANG, BANG, BOOGIE, THE BEAT.

NOW...

I KNOW THAT YOU ALL HAVE
DEADLINES, SO I WON'T KEEP YOU.

I'LL OPEN THE
FLOOR TO QUESTIONS.

[Reporters] MR. PRESIDENT!

AS THE FIRST BLACK PRESIDENT, DID
YOU EVER FEAR AN ATTEMPT ON YOUR LIFE?

WELL, MY ADMINISTRATION
DID FEAR ASSASSINATION...

EITHER BY STRANGULATION,
DECAPITATION...

OR DRIVIN' THROUGH THE
SOUTH WITHOUT IDENTIFICATION.

SO, I TOOK SEVERAL PRECAUTIONS
TO ENSURE MY SAFETY.

ONE WAS TO INCREASE
THE SIZE OF THE SECURITY.

AND I THANK EDDIE MURPHY FOR
LOANING ME BIG FRUITY AND RAY.

I ALSO, AS ALL OF MY
PREDECESSORS HAVE,

KEPT DAN QUAYLE
AS A VICE PRESIDENT.

- NEXT.
- UH, MR. PRESIDENT,
WHAT WOULD YOU SAY...

WERE THE MOST IMPORTANT ACCOMPLISHMENTS
OF YOUR EIGHT YEARS IN OFFICE?

WELL, MY ADMINISTRATION...

WAS RESPONSIBLE FOR
MUCH, MUCH LEGISLATION,

THOUGH IT TOOK A
LOT OF PERSPIRATION.

BUT THE ONE ACT THAT
I FEEL MOST PROUD OF...

IS THE JACKSON LIMITATION ACT.

AS ALL OF YOU KNOW, THAT IS THE
BILL THAT BANS ALL PERFORMANCES...

BY LATOYA OR TITO JACKSON.

MR. PRESIDENT.

BROTHER PRESIDENT.
YES, CALL ME JESSE.

DO YOU FEEL THAT YOU HAVE KEPT ALL OF
YOUR PROMISES TO THE AMERICAN PEOPLE?

WELL, I MOST
CERTAINLY HAVE TRIED...

AND DO FEEL THAT I HAVE...

KEPT THE MOST IMPORTANT
PROMISE TO THE AMERICAN PEOPLE,

WHICH IS TO KEEP HOPE ALIVE.

WOULD YOU ELABORATE
ON THAT, PLEASE?

YES, I CAN. MAY I HAVE
YOUR ATTENTION, PLEASE?

AS YOU CAN SEE, [Reporters] AHH!

BOB HOPE HAS BEEN FROZEN SOLID.

AND OUR SCIENTISTS BELIEVE
THAT HE CAN BE KEPT ALIVE...

FOR AT LEAST ANOTHER 100 YEARS.

THAT IS ALL THE TIME I HAVE,
SO I ASK THAT YOU WILL, PLEASE,

ONE LAST TIME, JOIN HANDS WITH
ME AND SAY, "KEEP HOPE ALIVE."

[All Chanting] KEEP HOPE
ALIVE! KEEP HOPE ALIVE!

[Man] THEY SING WITH MORE SCATS
THAN ELLA, MORE RIFFS THAN LUTHER.

THESE R&B SENSATIONS THROW IN MORE VOCAL
GIMMICKS THAN ANY OTHER SINGERS IN HISTORY.

THEY'RE THE KING AND QUEEN OF MAX STOP
MUSIC... CEPHUS AND REESIE MAYWEATHER.

♪ AROUND AND AROUND THE
MULBERRY BUSH ♪ SHE SAID MULBERRY.

♪ THAT MONKEY THAT
MONKEY ♪ LOOK OUT, MONKEY.

♪ HE CHASED A WEA-EA-EA-SAL ♪

THAT'S A LITTLE BITTY WEASEL.
♪ LITTLE BITTY WEASEL ♪

AND WHAT THEY DONE DID? ♪ THAT
WEASEL HE STOPPED HIS GRINNIN' ♪

♪ AND SAID ♪
WHAT THEY SAY?

HERE WE GO!

♪ POP GOES THE WEASEL
POP GOES THE WEASEL ♪

♪ POP GOES THE WEASEL
POP GOES THE WEASEL ♪

♪♪ [Continues, Indistinct]

[Man] THEY PERFORMED BEFORE
THE CROWNED HEADS OF NEBRASKA,

AND NOW THEY WILL SING FOR YOU
ON THIS NEW K-PELL ALBUM "WE TIGHT."

THE MAYWEATHERS CAN TAKE ANY
SONG AND GIVE IT THAT SPECIAL TOUCH.

LOOK UP IN THE SKY-RA, BABY.

AIN'T THAT A STAR-A?

THIS FOR YOU. OH, NO!

♪ TWINKLE, TWINKLE ♪

♪ LITTLE STAR-A ♪

♪ HOW I WONDER ♪
WHAT YOU WONDER?

♪ WHERE YOU BEEN ♪

♪ I'VE BEEN HANGIN' AROUND
WAITIN' ON MY BABY ♪♪

[Man] YOU'LL ALSO GET ALL OF
CEPHUS AND REESIE'S GREATEST HIT,

THE NUMBER-ONE SONG IN THE TRISTATE
AREA FOR ALMOST A WEEK AND A HALF...

"WE TIGHT."

♪ YEAH, WE TIGHT TIGHT
AS 10 TOES IN A SOCK ♪

♪ WE TIGHT TIGHT AS WEST
COAST MOUNTAIN HIGH ♪

ROBOT! IF YOU ACT NOW, YOU'LL
ALSO RECEIVE THIS SPECIAL BONUS,

YOUR VERY OWN 10-CARAT
GOLD-PLATED TOOTH CAP,

JUST LIKE THE ONE
CEPHUS AND REESIE WEAR.

JUST SEND $11 IN CASH TO:

AND GET ALL OF THE CEPHUS
AND REESIE YOU CAN STAND.

[Together] ♪ WE TIGHT ♪♪

♪♪ [Fanfare]

WELCOME BACK. I'M ALAN THICKE...

SITTIN' IN FOR JOHNNY CARSON.

BECAUSE EVERYONE KNOWS AT THIS
POINT ANOTHER CARSON IMPRESSION...

WOULD BE TOTALLY PASSÉ.

ED WON'T BE HERE TONIGHT EITHER. HE WOKE UP
WITH THE HEAD OF A CLYDESDALE IN HIS BED.

I GUESS WHEN YOU'RE IN BETWEEN
MARRIAGES, YOU'LL BRING HOME ANYTHING.

[Rim Shot]

[Laughs] ALL RIGHT.

OUR NEXT GUEST IS JOAN EMBRY FROM
THE SAN DIEGO ANTHROPOLOGICAL INSTITUTE.

AS YOU KNOW, JOAN IS
ALWAYS BRINGING WITH HER...

STRANGE AND EXOTIC
INHABITANTS OF THE PLANET.

AND TONIGHT SHE'S BRINGING
US AN ENDANGERED SPECIES.

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,
PLEASE WELCOME JOAN EMBRY.

[Applause, Cheering]

HI, JOAN. HI, ALAN.

- HE'S BEAUTIFUL.
- YES, HE IS.

THIS IS CALVIN. HE'S A
HOMEBOY-SAPIEN AFRICANUS,

OR "B-BOY" AS THEY'RE
KNOWN IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD.

IS HE ABLE TO WALK?

OH, YES, HE WALKS, BUT, YOU
SEE, THESE ARE NEW SNEAKERS...

AND THEY DON'T
LIKE TO CREASE THEM.

I SEE. AND WHAT IS HE DOING NOW?

THIS IS WHAT THEY
CALL "CHILLIN'," ALAN.

WELL, IT IS KIND OF COLD
IN THE STUDIO TODAY.

OH, NO, NO, NOT THAT KIND OF
CHILLIN'. HE'S JUST RELAXING...

- AND GETTING USED TO
HIS ENVIRONMENT.
- I SEE.

YO, JUST 'CAUSE YOU'RE LIVIN' LARGE
WITH CRAZY BANK AND STUPID WHEELS...

AND I'M BUTT NAKED, DON'T GIVE YOU
THE RIGHT TO DIS, KNOW WHAT I'M SAYIN'?

POR QUOI?

WELL, UH, THEIRS IS A RAPIDLY
CHANGING LANGUAGE, ALAN.

THERE'S NEW
TERMINOLOGY ALMOST DAILY.

BUT AS OF LAST FRIDAY,
WHAT HE SAID TO YOU WAS,

"JUST BECAUSE YOU'RE
RICH AND HE'S POOR,

DOESN'T GIVE YOU THE
RIGHT TO DISRESPECT HIM."

- OH, BOY.
- I WOULDN'T SAY THAT
AROUND HIM, ALAN.

IT TENDS TO, UM, IT
TENDS TO AGITATE HIM.

YO, YO, YO, CALVIN, MAN, COOL
OUT. THE DUDE'S JUST BUGGIN'.

IS HE DANGEROUS?

WELL, ALAN, LIKE ANY
OF GOD'S CREATIONS,

WITHOUT LOVE, A PROPER DIET, A DECENT
EDUCATION AND EQUAL OPPORTUNITIES,

HE COULD BE EXTREMELY DANGEROUS.

ALL THESE LIGHTS AND
CAMERAS DON'T HELP EITHER.

HE'S GOT A GUN!

NO, NO, ALAN, IT'S JUST CANDY.

[Calvin] YO, CHILL OUT. CANDY?

IT'S AN APPLE JOLLY RANCHER.

YEAH. IT SEEMS TO BE THE
FOUNDATION OF THE HOMEBOY'S DIET.

WHY THEY PREFER APPLE AS OPPOSED
TO GRAPE, WE'RE REALLY NOT QUITE SURE.

WELL, WHAT OTHER KIND
OF THINGS CAN HE DO?

WELL, HE CAN DO ANYTHING
ANYBODY ELSE CAN DO.

OH, YEAH? WELL, CAN
HE HOST A TALK SHOW?

I'M SURE HE COULD, YES.

YO, THAT AIN'T NOTHIN', MAN.
YO, CHECK THIS OUT, MAN.

IS THIS THING ON? YO,
WHAT'S UP? WHAT'S UP?

[Audience Replies, Indistinct]

♪ YOU GOT THE "C" THE "A,"
THE "L," THE "V" THE "I," THE "N" ♪

♪ COMIN' TO YOU MY FRIEND,
WE GO... ♪ ♪♪ [Rhythmic Spitting]

♪ WHEN I TAKE TO THE
STREETS AND I START TO CHILL ♪

♪ ARE PEOPLE LOOKIN' AT
ME LIKE LOOKS COULD KILL ♪

♪ NOW I WASN'T BORN
WITH A SILVER SPOON ♪

♪ I'M FROM THE HARD-CORE STREETS
AND THAT'S THE NAME OF THE TUNE ♪

♪ I'M NOT SOME CRAZY
FREAK FROM THE CITY ZOO ♪

♪ I'M JUST A DOWN-TO-EARTH
BROTHER THAT'S A LOT LIKE YOU ♪♪

PEACE. [Applause, Cheering]

WE'LL BE BACK, BUT
WE'LL NEVER BE THE SAME.

TITA! CHA-CHA!
CONCHA! ¿QUÉ HACE?

LOOK AT ALL THE
HAIR ON THE FLOOR.

IT LOOKS LIKE THE BATHTUB
AFTER YOU SHAVE YOUR LEGS.

OR AFTER YOU SHAVE YOUR
SHOULDERS, HUH, HECTOR?

SWEEP THE FLOOR, CONCHA!

HEY, MIRA. WHAT'S
THE MATTER WITH HIM?

CHA-CHA, LET ME TELL YOU,
BABY. IT'S A BIG SITUATION.

WHAT HAPPENED?

YESTERDAY, SHE CAUGHT HECTOR IN
THE BATHROOM WITH ANOTHER WOMAN.

NO, AY MI HIJA. I BET SHE ALMOST HAD A
CARDIAC ARREST. YOU SURE THAT HAPPENED?

I KNOW WHAT HAPPENED.
LET ME TELL YOU.

LAST NIGHT, I STAYED OVER AT DAISY'S
HOUSE, AND CONCHA TOLD MARISSA,

AND MARISSA TOLD LUCY AND LUCY
TOLD PABLO AND PABLO TOLD PEPE...

AND PEPE TOLD CUCA AND CUCA TOLD
CRAZY LEGS AND CRAZY LEGS TOLD MAD DOG...

AND MAD DOG TOLD LEFTY AND LEFTY
TOLD SHORTY AND SHORTY TOLD PEPE...

AND PEPE TOLD SOL AND SOL TOLD
ME, BABY, SO YOU KNOW IT'S A FACT.

I KNOW. I KNOW IT'S A FACT.

CONCHA, I TOLD YOU
TO SWEEP THE FLOOR.

WHY DON'T YOU ASK THE PENDEJA I
CAUGHT YOU WITH TO SWEEP THE FLOOR, HUH?

CONCHA, MY LITTLE PONCE
DE LEÓN, IT WAS NOTHING.

I... AY! MIRA, CONDENADA,
YOU BIT MY LIP!

¡VEN ACÁ! AY!

[Arguing In Spanish]

THERE'S A CUSTOMER, ESTÚPIDO!

HOLA. I AM SENOR HECTOR,

PROPRIETOR OF CASA DE HAIR.

HI. I'M VISITIN'
FROM OUT OF TOWN.

AND THE CONCIERGE AT THE HOTEL
DIRECTED ME TO THE VIDAL SASSOON NEXT DOOR,

BUT THEY HAVE
APPARENTLY BURNT DOWN.

[Together] MM-HMM.

TITA, CHECK THE
APPOINTMENT BOOK, POR FAVOR.

- YOU DON'T HAVE
NO APPOINTMENT BOOK.
- ¡AYÚDAME!

PRONTO.

OH, MADONNA JUST CANCELED,
HECTOR. YOU'RE FREE.

FOLLOW ME, SENORITA.

[Spanish, Indistinct]

SIÉNTATE, MI PRINCESA.

OH. [Chuckles] OLÉ!

CONCHA, THE LADY
WOULD LIKE A MANICURE.

SO, ARE YOU MARRIED, SENORITA?

WELL... OH, MY GOODNESS!

AREN'T YOU SOMETHING? AS A
MATTER OF FACT I AM, SENOR HECTOR.

LET ME ASK YOU A QUESTION.
WHAT WOULD YOU DO...

IF YOU FOUND YOUR
WORTHLESS HUSBAND...

ALONE IN THE BATHROOM
WITH A STRANGE WOMAN?

OH, I'M AFRAID I WOULD JUST
KICK HIS LITTLE BEHIND. OW!

WHAT IF HE WAS ONLY THERE
TRYING TO FIX THE PLUMBING?

WELL, THERE DOESN'T SEEM TO BE ANYTHING
WRONG WITH THAT, I GUESS. [Screams]

BUT WHAT IF HIS
PLUMBING IS SO BAD...

THAT HE CAN'T EVEN
SATISFY HIS OWN WIFE?

YOU KNOW, AS A WIFE, I WOULD
FIND THAT EXTREMELY FRUSTRATING.

WELL, OF COURSE, MAYBE HE
WASN'T DOING EVERYTHING HE COULD...

TO FEEL MORE LIKE A MAN. [Gasps]

WHAT I MEAN IS... I MEAN, MAYBE
IT WAS BECAUSE HIS COLOGNE...

SMELLED A LITTLE MORE LIKE
EMBALMING FLUID. OH, NO, BABY!

I BOUGHT HECTOR
THAT COLOGNE, OKAY?

ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT
MY WIFE'S TASTE IN COLOGNE?

NO! YOU KNOW, I THINK I
WOULD JUST HAVE TO KNOW...

A LITTLE BIT MORE ABOUT THE WHOLE
SITUATION BEFORE RENDERING AN OPINION.

EXCUSE ME. I'M LATE FOR
AN APPOINTMENT. ¡ESPÉRATE!

AYE, LOOK AT THAT.

ANOTHER VALUED CUSTOMER HAS LEFT MY
ESTABLISHMENT, AND IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT.

AH, KISS MY CHUTECA
AND DIE, HECTOR.

I GOING TO KILL YOU! [Groans]

I HOPE SHE DON'T TAKE
OFF THAT SHOE AND THROW

IT AT HIS HEAD AGAIN
LIKE SHE DID LAST TIME.

IT'S OKAY BECAUSE HE'S SO HARD
UP, HE'S NOT EVEN GOING TO FEEL IT.

[Grunting] YOU
KNOW I LOVE YOU...

WHEN YOUR EYES ARE BULGING.

YOU MAKE ME FEEL SO CALIENTE WHEN
THAT LITTLE VEIN POPS OUTTA YOUR HEAD.

CHICAS, TAKE A BREAK.

I GUESS MAYBE THEY'RE NOT
GOING TO GET A DIVORCE AFTER ALL.

HONEY, IF THAT'S THE CASE, LET ME GET
ON THE PHONE, 'CAUSE I GOTTA TELL PACO...

SO HE CAN TELL PEPE
AND PEPE CAN TELL PUCA.

♪ BESAME BESAME MUCHO ♪♪

AYE-AYE-AYE-AYE!

HEY, BROTHER, CAN WE TALK?

♪♪ [Hip-hop]

♪ BROTHERHOOD ♪

♪ BROTHERHOOD
B-B-B-BROTHERHOOD ♪

♪ BROTHER, OPEN YOUR
EYES TELL ME WHAT YOU SEE ♪

♪ CAN YOU SEE
RACISM'S HOSTILITY ♪

♪ YOU'LL KNOW IN YOUR
SOUL AS WELL AS YOUR HEART ♪

♪ IT'S TIME TO GET SMART ♪

♪ IT'S TIME TO GET
SMART, Y'ALL ♪♪

[Siren Wailing In Distance]

[Clears Throat]

P.B.S... THE PAVEMENT
BROADCAST SYSTEM...

PROUDLY PRESENTS...

A NEW DO-IT-YOURSELF-AT-HOME
HOME IMPROVEMENT SHOW.

MY NAME IS ANTON,

AND THIS IS MY HOUSE,
SLASH BATHROOM,

SLASH KITCHEN, SLASH
BACKYARD, SLASH LIBRARY.

OH, I FORGOT WE'RE ON
TV. LET ME FIX MY MAKEUP.

NOW, LET'S...

WE'RE GONNA NEED A
LITTLE BIT OF WORK LIGHT,

SO LET'S GO TO A
CONVENIENT POWER SOURCE.

[Electricity
Crackling] [Yelling]

REMEMBER, SAFETY LAST
WHEN YOU AIN'T GOT NO MONEY.

NOW, TODAY WE'RE
GONNA ADD ON A NEW ROOM.

BUT I HAVE TO MAKE SURE
THAT I GOT THE PROPER TOOLS.

THIS IS THE DRILL.

MY HAMMER.

MY MEASURING TAPE.

OH, THAT'S THE EXTENSION CORD.

LET'S JUST USE THE
ROPE FOR NOW. [Laughs]

AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST,
I NEED MY SCREWDRIVER.

AHH! OHH!

I NEED ANOTHER ONE OF THAT.

NOW LET'S GET STARTED, SHALL WE?

NOW, IN ORDER TO
ADD ON THIS NEW ROOM,

WE'RE GONNA HAVE TO
MAKE A NEW DOORWAY.

SO WHAT DO WE
DO? WE MARK IT. [Spits]

WITH AN "X."

AND THEN WE CUT THE HOLE.

SMOOTH OUT THE ROUGH EDGES.

PICK UP OUR PANTS.

AND NOW LET'S ADD
ON THE NEW ROOM.

NOW, IN ORDER TO BOND THIS,

WE'RE GONNA HAVE TO USE
AN ALL-NATURAL ADHESIVE.

Y'ALL CHILDREN, DON'T
TRY THIS AT HOME.

WE JUST PUT THAT THERE.

AND WHEN THIS DRIES, IT'LL
BE CRAZY LIKE KRAZY GLUE.

NOW, OUR NEW GUEST
WING IS ALMOST COMPLETE.

BUT NOT YET.

WE NEED TO INSTALL THE PLUMBING.

I'LL GO GET THE BATHROOM.

SO, WE'LL JUST SET THAT
THERE, RIGHT THERE. WAIT.

PUT A LITTLE TOILET
PAPER IN THERE.

SO, NOW WHEN COMPANY COME OVER,
THEY DON'T HAVE TO STEAL YOUR BATHROOM.

WELL, THAT'S THE SHOW FOR TODAY.

JOIN ME NEXT WEEK WHEN
I'LL BE SHOWING YOU...

HOW TO MAKE A JACUZZI
OUT OF A GARBAGE CAN.

THIS IS ANTON FOR
THIS OL' BOX SAYING,

"HASTA LA... SOMETHING OTHER."

ALL RIGHT. THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

WE'LL SEE YOU NEXT TIME. SAY
HELLO TO OUR NEWEST CAST MEMBER.

SAY... SAY GOOD
NIGHT TO EVERYBODY.

TELL 'EM, "SEE YOU NEXT
WEEK." SAY GOOD NIGHT.

SAY SEE YOU NEXT WEEK. "SEE YOU
NEXT WEEK." SEE YOU NEXT WEEK! HA!

THAT'S WHY SHE'S NOT GETTING
SCHEDULED. GOOD NIGHT.

♪ YOU CAN DO WHAT YOU WANNA DO ♪

♪ IN LIVING COLOR ♪♪