Hercules (1998–1999): Season 2, Episode 12 - Hercules and the Gorgon - full transcript
Medusa is granted her wish to be human, with the truth, totally unknown to Hercules.
♪ Who put the
"glad" in gladiator? ♪
♪ Hercules ♪
♪ Whose daring deeds
are great theater? ♪
♪ Hercules ♪
♪ Is he bold? ♪
♪ No one braver ♪
♪ Is he sweet? ♪
♪ Our favorite
flavor, Hercules ♪
- ♪ What a guy ♪
- ♪ Hercules ♪
- ♪ Ask his friends ♪
- ♪ Hercules ♪
♪ Honey, they won't lie ♪
- ♪ Hercules ♪
- ♪ Ahh, Hercules ♪
♪ Hercules ♪
- ♪ Come on ♪
- ♪ No one's fool ♪
♪ Now, the boy's in school ♪
♪ He's in trainin' ♪
♪ Sun is shinin' ♪
♪ And the nicest guy ♪
♪ No complainin' ♪
♪ He was a no one ♪
♪ Zero, zero, give
him a quick deed ♪
♪ He's our hero ♪
♪ He's the most
likely to succeed ♪
♪ From zero to hero ♪
♪ Herc is a hero ♪
♪ He'll be a hero ♪
Wait and see!
Hello, sunshine.
Icarus, you're too
close. Pull back!
Negatory. Moth maintaining
intercept course with flame.
Oh, no. I did it again.
Yah!
Mayday! Mayday! I'm going down!
Oh, man!
Come on, boy, dive!
Aah! Yikes!
Well, we can
rule out pilot error.
That was clearly the
result of equipment failure.
Gaah! Oh!
- Gee, ngah, n-gee.
Oh, ho-ho.
Aiee!
Hold on!
Oof!
Aah! Whoa! Oof!
D-aah!
Uhh! Aah. Unh.
Come on, buddy!
Grab my hand!
Unh!
- Hercules!
- Aah!
Eh-heh. Oops.
Sorry.
Herc!
Uh-oh.
Where are you?
Hercules!
Whoa, buddy, are you all right?
Uhh. Yeah. Yeah, I think so.
Thanks for pulling me
out of the river, Icarus.
Oh, no thanks necessary, Herc,
'cause I didn't actually
pull ya out of the river.
Well, then who did?
Well, I don't know.
Well, maybe it was
that guy over there.
Yoo-hoo, mister!
Thanks for helping my friend
here. You really saved his...
Gaah! Eek! Ooh!
Aah! Oy! Oh, no!
Icarus, what is this place?
Get on the horse now!
Right.
It was so weird, Phil.
There... there were
dozens of statues.
Statues, I knew it.
All right. Here we go,
kid. Get a feel for 'em.
Oof! What's this for?
Gorgons, kid. You
were in a gorgon lair.
Starting tomorrow, we're
shifting your training.
To a gorgon-intensive program.
What do I do with this?
Rookie, you can't look
a gorgon in the eye!
They'll turn you to stone.
So use the other
side like a mirror.
Oh.
"Monsters are closer
than they appear."
Words to live by, kid.
Hey, what's the
matter, Mr. Stone,
people taking you for granite?
Eh, how about a little sun?
Unh. You feel heavier.
I think it's your
sedimentary lifestyle.
Hey, come on, folks, I
don't sing or dance, all right?
This is my best material.
Hmm, what's this?
"Hercules". Oh, what I wouldn't
give for a friend who isn't a rock head.
I would do anything to
change the way I look.
Mm, nice try.
Hey, if any of you gods
are listening out there,
I'm ready to deal.
Hey, how you doing?
Hades, lord of the dead.
♪ Aphrodite,
Aphrodite, Aphrodite ♪
♪ The goddess of love ♪
Greetings, mortal.
I am Aphro... no. Oh, no.
What are you doing here?
No. No. No. This
is my beseechment.
Aphrodite, babe. Looking good.
Love the song, by the way.
Mm-hmm, save it. Look. This
is really my territory, all right?
It's clearly a
self-esteem issue.
Ugh, "Issue." Oy. Listen,
babe... may I call you "babe"?
Last thing I want to do
is step on your territory,
but desperation is my bag.
OK? It's my "Issue."
Not really. Uh-uh. Sticking your nose
where it doesn't belong is your bag. Eh.
Uh, excuse me.
I really don't care who does the job, so
long as somebody makes me look good.
Medusa, you want
real friends, right?
Right. Non-mineral.
Mm-hmm. Well, real friends
will like you for who you are,
not what you look like.
Oh, please. In
storybook land, maybe.
Look. All you need is to
lose this gorgon accouterment
and become human.
You can do that?
Yes. This is what I do.
Medusa, babe, here's my offer:
You work for me at night,
you know, doing your gorgon
terror thing... Booga, booga, booga.
And by day, I'll make you human.
You can frolic and play,
schmooze, gossip, whatever,
Talk issues with all
your little human friends.
It'll be great.
OK. You do know he's
the lord of the dead, right?
He's coming up with the goods.
And what are you offering?
Well, Hephaestus made these
for me to wear at the beach,
but they will
absolutely work for you.
You can look at people
and they won't turn to stone.
Keeps harmful gorgon
magic in, harmful UV rays out.
And? I don't, I...
You're really wowing me, ha.
So, do we have a
thing here or what?
Medusa, if you live a lie,
you will never know if
your friendships are true.
Will you stop!
You're killing me.
Here, just for funsies, to
thicken the plot, if you will,
I'll sweeten the deal.
If she finds one true friend
who likes her for who she is,
then, hey, boom, I
make her human forever.
What do you say?
What do I say?
Between the stupid glasses
or the full-on makeover?
This.
Bibbity, bobbity, boo!
Man, I should've
beseeched you years ago.
Go on! Get out of
here, you crazy thing.
But remember,
you're mine at sunset.
Later!
Wow. You do nothing but prey
on the weak and disadvantaged.
Pfft. It pays the bills, huh?
Ooh, baby.
Whoa!
Oh, uh, excuse me.
Oh, uh, ha, that's OK.
Hey! Hey, it's you.
Uh, have we met?
Met? Oh! Heh.
No, of course not. I
mean, I'm... I'm new here.
How could we possibly have met?
But I did find this.
I think it's yours,
uh, Hercules, is it?
Oh, I've been looking all over
for this. Where'd you find it?
Oh, it was just laying around.
So, Hercules, do you have
time to show a new girl around?
Well, you just saved me
a 10-drachma lost ID fine,
so, uh, how can I say no?
OK. I know I'm new and
all, but that Adonis guy,
ooh, could he stand to
get over himself a little.
And his girlfriend Helen,
who can be that
happy all the time?
I like this girl.
So you're real impressed
with the school, huh?
Hmm.
Um, Medusa, I was just, um...
Uh, I was just wondering,
you know... I mean,
I... I... if you're not
busy or anything...
So, Medusa!
Is there anyone
special in your life?
'Cause, uh, my boy
Herc here is, uh...
- Yiee!
- Hee hee!
Not yet, but I'm hoping.
Well, uh, I... I was
wondering if, uh...
Wow!
Would you two kids
look at that sunset. Hmm?
Sunset?
Wow. When Apollo's on, he's on.
Uh, I gotta go.
- Whoa!
- Medusa? Wait!
Daaigh!
Did I come on too strong?
Is... Is my breath... No.
The ladies go wild for
sardine-and-onion breath.
Isn't that right, honey?
Oh, boy. This isn't good.
Ah!
Doll, are you OK?
Aagh!
Heh.
Oops. Sorry.
Could the service
be any slower tonight?
Gorgon!
Gorgon!
- Mommy! Mommy!
- Aaagh!
Gorgon? I haven't
trained for that yet.
Darn it.
Oh, this is getting ugly.
Oh, who asked you?
I'm ready to face
you, vile monster.
But, uh...
Could you come out of
the ladies' room, please?
Well, this just gets more
and more humiliating.
Ta-da!
So... would you open your eyes.
She can only turn
mortals to stone.
Dimwits.
Heeh! It's not that. It's...
It's just that we're
in the ladies' room.
Oy.
So, you ready for your first day
of work on Team Hades? Huh?
Sure, whatever. Just
get me outta here.
Uh... are you coming out now?
Hello? Hello?
Come on, kid,
don't feel bad about
what happened up there.
You know what? I
believe, any day now,
you'll find your
one true friend,
and then, bada-bing!
You're human.
Let's just get started.
What do you want me to do?
Hey! Whoa! Not so fast.
Everyone goes to
orientation on their first day.
Orientation?
I run a professional
organization.
Hi! I'm Pain.
And I'm Panic.
Welcome to
underworld orientation.
Uh, Mr. Panic, I have a question
about our employee
health benefits.
Just "Panic" please.
We're a "first name
only" kinda place.
Yeah, and we're not employees.
We're cast members.
Hey, guys. What's
all this about?
Emergency assembly.
I predict utter boredom.
Hey, where were you last night?
You missed all the excitement.
Oh. Heh. It was just,
uh... A "bad hair day" thing.
Well... ahem, anyway,
um, there was something
I was going to ask you.
- Would you consider...
- Zip it, punks!
All right, quiet down.
Now listen up, people.
We've got a gorgon at large.
Gorgon?
Now the only sure-fire
way to slay a gorgon
is by chopping off its head.
Sever the head with a
quick but forceful slice.
Something wrong?
Now, once you've removed
said monster's head,
carefully put it in a purse.
Purse?
Not a wallet, men. A purse.
This is no time to be macho.
I myself own a little patent
leather over-the-shoulder number,
but any quality handbag will do.
Now, once the head is
safely inside the purse,
you take it to your
nearest "A" -level god
for disposal. Got it?
Are you sure you're OK?
Yeah. Yeah, just this...
Gorgon-killing stuff,
it, uh, just kinda
gets me worked up.
Hey, it gets us all worked up.
Ah!
Ah!
Ah! Oh!
Ah!
Aaagh!
Grrrrr...
Ah!
Zool, wait! It's me, Medusa.
Medusa?
Jeez. I hardly recognized ya.
So this is your day gig, huh?
How's it goin'?
Eh, so so.
Oh, do I gotta bust some heads?
No. No. I just feel like I'm...
I feel like I'm living a lie.
Aw, well...
Technically, you are.
Blow.
Thank you.
Hey. You know... You're right.
You're right. I'm just gonna
show Hercules the real me.
Oh, thanks, Zool. You're a pal.
Aw, go on.
So, what's your
assignment today?
Eat some people.
Huh. It's a no-brainer.
Hercules?
Hercules.
- Hey.
- Ah!
Where you been?
Can we talk?
Sure. I'm just finishing up.
Uggh!
Duck!
Ah!
Sorry, but, uh, it's
for your own safety.
Don't worry. It's fake.
See? So, what do
you wanna talk about?
Uh, I don't think now
is a good time, so...
- Bye.
- Aw, come on. Hey, wait.
We're friends, right? So...
so you can tell me anything.
That's cute in a
really naive way, Herc,
but, nah, I think I'll
keep this one to myself.
Come on.
What is so horrible
that you can't tell me?
Nothing, I hope.
Well, Herc, you see...
"Monsters are closer
than they appear."
You're the gorgon?
Hey, good eye. And you're
only a hero-in-training?
Oh! I'm so stupid!
It was so obvious.
How could I be so dumb?
You had my ID. You picked
me out to show you the school.
- You even pretended to be my friend.
- I wasn't pretending, Hercules.
I am your friend.
I showed you everything...
Where I train, all my moves.
- I showed you all my moves.
- Would you be quiet for one second!
Now, why do you
think I did all this?
To get close to me so you...
could turn me into stone.
Look, if I wanted you
stone, you'd be stone.
Well... what am I
supposed to think?
I don't even know who you are.
Funny. I was just thinking
the same thing about you.
So-ho, buddy boy,
did you ask Medusa out yet?
Icarus, Medusa is the gorgon.
What?
The gorgon?
So, where are you
gonna take her?
Didn't you just
hear what I said?
She's the gorgon!
The monster that
turns people into stone.
Oh, Herc.
A relationship is
built on compromises.
Arrgh! Icarus!
There is no relationship.
Well, maybe there's
not a lot of eye contact,
but she had a
winning personality.
She's a monster!
A... a freak!
Oh, I see.
So the hero's too good
to have a freak
for a friend, huh?
Watcha gonna do, Herc?
You gonna get rid of her?
You gonna go stick
her head in a purse?
- Wh... what? I...
- And then what?
You gonna get rid
of all the freaks, huh?
Who's next, Herc? Freaks
who flew too close to the sun?
I'll tell you what
I'm gonna do...
What I should've
done in the first place.
OK, let's rock and roll!
See, rock is a little joke, 'cause
you turn people to stone. Get...
Uh, OK.
Count me out. I'm
not up to it tonight.
Pardon?
You signed a contract, remember?
No pay, no play.
Don't I get any sick days?
OK. Why don't you tell
Unca Hades all about it,
and you'll feel much better.
Well... OK.
- There's this boy, and he's really cute.
- Medusa!
I know that voice.
- Hercules.
- Hercules?
That's the guy?
Correct me if I'm wrong.
But Hercules is
a hero, is he not?
And heroes kill
monsters like you.
- Am I wrong?
- Sure, he hurt my feelings,
but I don't think
he would kill me.
Oooogh! That's a
cute world you live in.
It really is. It's so nice.
Everybody gets along.
Wake up, little girl!
This kid is a gorgon-slayer.
Then, he's coming here to...
Duh.
No. No, I can't believe that.
OK. Hey, but if I were you,
I'd... turn him to stone.
Just a suggestion.
How's my head
look? Is it on straight?
Medusa!
Are you here?
- Come out!
- Go on, get outta here.
I can take care of myself.
All right, all right. I'll just
be over here if you need me.
I gotta see a man
about something.
Um, over here, Hercules.
Medusa?
Lose the shield, hero.
It's too dark to
see the monster.
Heh. I deserve that.
That's why I brought you this.
Ah-choo!
What...
Oops.
Ugh! You creep!
Hey. Hey, not my
fault. I got a cold.
Do I feel warm? I
feel, I feel warm, uh?
Look, he was clearly
going for his sword.
Come on.
Flowers?
He was coming to apologize.
Oh! What have I done?
Oops. Gee, guess
I misjudged the guy.
Gee, I feel awful.
- Oh, well.
- Ahem.
Uh, aren't you forgetting
something, Hades?
♪ Aphrodite ♪
Oy, Aprhodite,
again with the song.
Mm-hmm. Now, I don't know,
I'd say this qualifies
as "one true friend."
Make her human, loser.
Hey, if I could only
turn one person to stone,
I'm glad it was jerkules.
I hate that kid.
Bada-bing! Human time.
Whoa.
Wha... What happened?
Hey! Come on, no
fair. Interference.
Hey, what good is a
true friend if he's a rock?
Uh, look... I don't know
what all this is about,
but I came here on a mission.
Medusa, I, uh...
I know I've been
kinda, like, a jerk,
but I was wondering
if you'd like to, um...
go out with me tonight.
- Hmm?
- Yeah.
You know, I think
my calendar's clean.
Ha! Well, then, let's go.
Uh, hold on.
Um, I was just wondering if...
Oh, yeah, of course.
Hey, you go, girl.
I don't think we'll
be needing this.
Aw, that's so nice.
That's nice, huh?
Kids got together,
and, you know...
We're here... So, whadya think?
Shall we make it a
double date, huh?
Grrrr!
Heh! Hagh!
Hephaestus.
I... I'm sorry, ma'am.
What was your name again?
I was just chatting
with the nice lady.
I gotta go. I gotta
go shampoo my hair.
That's likely.
"glad" in gladiator? ♪
♪ Hercules ♪
♪ Whose daring deeds
are great theater? ♪
♪ Hercules ♪
♪ Is he bold? ♪
♪ No one braver ♪
♪ Is he sweet? ♪
♪ Our favorite
flavor, Hercules ♪
- ♪ What a guy ♪
- ♪ Hercules ♪
- ♪ Ask his friends ♪
- ♪ Hercules ♪
♪ Honey, they won't lie ♪
- ♪ Hercules ♪
- ♪ Ahh, Hercules ♪
♪ Hercules ♪
- ♪ Come on ♪
- ♪ No one's fool ♪
♪ Now, the boy's in school ♪
♪ He's in trainin' ♪
♪ Sun is shinin' ♪
♪ And the nicest guy ♪
♪ No complainin' ♪
♪ He was a no one ♪
♪ Zero, zero, give
him a quick deed ♪
♪ He's our hero ♪
♪ He's the most
likely to succeed ♪
♪ From zero to hero ♪
♪ Herc is a hero ♪
♪ He'll be a hero ♪
Wait and see!
Hello, sunshine.
Icarus, you're too
close. Pull back!
Negatory. Moth maintaining
intercept course with flame.
Oh, no. I did it again.
Yah!
Mayday! Mayday! I'm going down!
Oh, man!
Come on, boy, dive!
Aah! Yikes!
Well, we can
rule out pilot error.
That was clearly the
result of equipment failure.
Gaah! Oh!
- Gee, ngah, n-gee.
Oh, ho-ho.
Aiee!
Hold on!
Oof!
Aah! Whoa! Oof!
D-aah!
Uhh! Aah. Unh.
Come on, buddy!
Grab my hand!
Unh!
- Hercules!
- Aah!
Eh-heh. Oops.
Sorry.
Herc!
Uh-oh.
Where are you?
Hercules!
Whoa, buddy, are you all right?
Uhh. Yeah. Yeah, I think so.
Thanks for pulling me
out of the river, Icarus.
Oh, no thanks necessary, Herc,
'cause I didn't actually
pull ya out of the river.
Well, then who did?
Well, I don't know.
Well, maybe it was
that guy over there.
Yoo-hoo, mister!
Thanks for helping my friend
here. You really saved his...
Gaah! Eek! Ooh!
Aah! Oy! Oh, no!
Icarus, what is this place?
Get on the horse now!
Right.
It was so weird, Phil.
There... there were
dozens of statues.
Statues, I knew it.
All right. Here we go,
kid. Get a feel for 'em.
Oof! What's this for?
Gorgons, kid. You
were in a gorgon lair.
Starting tomorrow, we're
shifting your training.
To a gorgon-intensive program.
What do I do with this?
Rookie, you can't look
a gorgon in the eye!
They'll turn you to stone.
So use the other
side like a mirror.
Oh.
"Monsters are closer
than they appear."
Words to live by, kid.
Hey, what's the
matter, Mr. Stone,
people taking you for granite?
Eh, how about a little sun?
Unh. You feel heavier.
I think it's your
sedimentary lifestyle.
Hey, come on, folks, I
don't sing or dance, all right?
This is my best material.
Hmm, what's this?
"Hercules". Oh, what I wouldn't
give for a friend who isn't a rock head.
I would do anything to
change the way I look.
Mm, nice try.
Hey, if any of you gods
are listening out there,
I'm ready to deal.
Hey, how you doing?
Hades, lord of the dead.
♪ Aphrodite,
Aphrodite, Aphrodite ♪
♪ The goddess of love ♪
Greetings, mortal.
I am Aphro... no. Oh, no.
What are you doing here?
No. No. No. This
is my beseechment.
Aphrodite, babe. Looking good.
Love the song, by the way.
Mm-hmm, save it. Look. This
is really my territory, all right?
It's clearly a
self-esteem issue.
Ugh, "Issue." Oy. Listen,
babe... may I call you "babe"?
Last thing I want to do
is step on your territory,
but desperation is my bag.
OK? It's my "Issue."
Not really. Uh-uh. Sticking your nose
where it doesn't belong is your bag. Eh.
Uh, excuse me.
I really don't care who does the job, so
long as somebody makes me look good.
Medusa, you want
real friends, right?
Right. Non-mineral.
Mm-hmm. Well, real friends
will like you for who you are,
not what you look like.
Oh, please. In
storybook land, maybe.
Look. All you need is to
lose this gorgon accouterment
and become human.
You can do that?
Yes. This is what I do.
Medusa, babe, here's my offer:
You work for me at night,
you know, doing your gorgon
terror thing... Booga, booga, booga.
And by day, I'll make you human.
You can frolic and play,
schmooze, gossip, whatever,
Talk issues with all
your little human friends.
It'll be great.
OK. You do know he's
the lord of the dead, right?
He's coming up with the goods.
And what are you offering?
Well, Hephaestus made these
for me to wear at the beach,
but they will
absolutely work for you.
You can look at people
and they won't turn to stone.
Keeps harmful gorgon
magic in, harmful UV rays out.
And? I don't, I...
You're really wowing me, ha.
So, do we have a
thing here or what?
Medusa, if you live a lie,
you will never know if
your friendships are true.
Will you stop!
You're killing me.
Here, just for funsies, to
thicken the plot, if you will,
I'll sweeten the deal.
If she finds one true friend
who likes her for who she is,
then, hey, boom, I
make her human forever.
What do you say?
What do I say?
Between the stupid glasses
or the full-on makeover?
This.
Bibbity, bobbity, boo!
Man, I should've
beseeched you years ago.
Go on! Get out of
here, you crazy thing.
But remember,
you're mine at sunset.
Later!
Wow. You do nothing but prey
on the weak and disadvantaged.
Pfft. It pays the bills, huh?
Ooh, baby.
Whoa!
Oh, uh, excuse me.
Oh, uh, ha, that's OK.
Hey! Hey, it's you.
Uh, have we met?
Met? Oh! Heh.
No, of course not. I
mean, I'm... I'm new here.
How could we possibly have met?
But I did find this.
I think it's yours,
uh, Hercules, is it?
Oh, I've been looking all over
for this. Where'd you find it?
Oh, it was just laying around.
So, Hercules, do you have
time to show a new girl around?
Well, you just saved me
a 10-drachma lost ID fine,
so, uh, how can I say no?
OK. I know I'm new and
all, but that Adonis guy,
ooh, could he stand to
get over himself a little.
And his girlfriend Helen,
who can be that
happy all the time?
I like this girl.
So you're real impressed
with the school, huh?
Hmm.
Um, Medusa, I was just, um...
Uh, I was just wondering,
you know... I mean,
I... I... if you're not
busy or anything...
So, Medusa!
Is there anyone
special in your life?
'Cause, uh, my boy
Herc here is, uh...
- Yiee!
- Hee hee!
Not yet, but I'm hoping.
Well, uh, I... I was
wondering if, uh...
Wow!
Would you two kids
look at that sunset. Hmm?
Sunset?
Wow. When Apollo's on, he's on.
Uh, I gotta go.
- Whoa!
- Medusa? Wait!
Daaigh!
Did I come on too strong?
Is... Is my breath... No.
The ladies go wild for
sardine-and-onion breath.
Isn't that right, honey?
Oh, boy. This isn't good.
Ah!
Doll, are you OK?
Aagh!
Heh.
Oops. Sorry.
Could the service
be any slower tonight?
Gorgon!
Gorgon!
- Mommy! Mommy!
- Aaagh!
Gorgon? I haven't
trained for that yet.
Darn it.
Oh, this is getting ugly.
Oh, who asked you?
I'm ready to face
you, vile monster.
But, uh...
Could you come out of
the ladies' room, please?
Well, this just gets more
and more humiliating.
Ta-da!
So... would you open your eyes.
She can only turn
mortals to stone.
Dimwits.
Heeh! It's not that. It's...
It's just that we're
in the ladies' room.
Oy.
So, you ready for your first day
of work on Team Hades? Huh?
Sure, whatever. Just
get me outta here.
Uh... are you coming out now?
Hello? Hello?
Come on, kid,
don't feel bad about
what happened up there.
You know what? I
believe, any day now,
you'll find your
one true friend,
and then, bada-bing!
You're human.
Let's just get started.
What do you want me to do?
Hey! Whoa! Not so fast.
Everyone goes to
orientation on their first day.
Orientation?
I run a professional
organization.
Hi! I'm Pain.
And I'm Panic.
Welcome to
underworld orientation.
Uh, Mr. Panic, I have a question
about our employee
health benefits.
Just "Panic" please.
We're a "first name
only" kinda place.
Yeah, and we're not employees.
We're cast members.
Hey, guys. What's
all this about?
Emergency assembly.
I predict utter boredom.
Hey, where were you last night?
You missed all the excitement.
Oh. Heh. It was just,
uh... A "bad hair day" thing.
Well... ahem, anyway,
um, there was something
I was going to ask you.
- Would you consider...
- Zip it, punks!
All right, quiet down.
Now listen up, people.
We've got a gorgon at large.
Gorgon?
Now the only sure-fire
way to slay a gorgon
is by chopping off its head.
Sever the head with a
quick but forceful slice.
Something wrong?
Now, once you've removed
said monster's head,
carefully put it in a purse.
Purse?
Not a wallet, men. A purse.
This is no time to be macho.
I myself own a little patent
leather over-the-shoulder number,
but any quality handbag will do.
Now, once the head is
safely inside the purse,
you take it to your
nearest "A" -level god
for disposal. Got it?
Are you sure you're OK?
Yeah. Yeah, just this...
Gorgon-killing stuff,
it, uh, just kinda
gets me worked up.
Hey, it gets us all worked up.
Ah!
Ah!
Ah! Oh!
Ah!
Aaagh!
Grrrrr...
Ah!
Zool, wait! It's me, Medusa.
Medusa?
Jeez. I hardly recognized ya.
So this is your day gig, huh?
How's it goin'?
Eh, so so.
Oh, do I gotta bust some heads?
No. No. I just feel like I'm...
I feel like I'm living a lie.
Aw, well...
Technically, you are.
Blow.
Thank you.
Hey. You know... You're right.
You're right. I'm just gonna
show Hercules the real me.
Oh, thanks, Zool. You're a pal.
Aw, go on.
So, what's your
assignment today?
Eat some people.
Huh. It's a no-brainer.
Hercules?
Hercules.
- Hey.
- Ah!
Where you been?
Can we talk?
Sure. I'm just finishing up.
Uggh!
Duck!
Ah!
Sorry, but, uh, it's
for your own safety.
Don't worry. It's fake.
See? So, what do
you wanna talk about?
Uh, I don't think now
is a good time, so...
- Bye.
- Aw, come on. Hey, wait.
We're friends, right? So...
so you can tell me anything.
That's cute in a
really naive way, Herc,
but, nah, I think I'll
keep this one to myself.
Come on.
What is so horrible
that you can't tell me?
Nothing, I hope.
Well, Herc, you see...
"Monsters are closer
than they appear."
You're the gorgon?
Hey, good eye. And you're
only a hero-in-training?
Oh! I'm so stupid!
It was so obvious.
How could I be so dumb?
You had my ID. You picked
me out to show you the school.
- You even pretended to be my friend.
- I wasn't pretending, Hercules.
I am your friend.
I showed you everything...
Where I train, all my moves.
- I showed you all my moves.
- Would you be quiet for one second!
Now, why do you
think I did all this?
To get close to me so you...
could turn me into stone.
Look, if I wanted you
stone, you'd be stone.
Well... what am I
supposed to think?
I don't even know who you are.
Funny. I was just thinking
the same thing about you.
So-ho, buddy boy,
did you ask Medusa out yet?
Icarus, Medusa is the gorgon.
What?
The gorgon?
So, where are you
gonna take her?
Didn't you just
hear what I said?
She's the gorgon!
The monster that
turns people into stone.
Oh, Herc.
A relationship is
built on compromises.
Arrgh! Icarus!
There is no relationship.
Well, maybe there's
not a lot of eye contact,
but she had a
winning personality.
She's a monster!
A... a freak!
Oh, I see.
So the hero's too good
to have a freak
for a friend, huh?
Watcha gonna do, Herc?
You gonna get rid of her?
You gonna go stick
her head in a purse?
- Wh... what? I...
- And then what?
You gonna get rid
of all the freaks, huh?
Who's next, Herc? Freaks
who flew too close to the sun?
I'll tell you what
I'm gonna do...
What I should've
done in the first place.
OK, let's rock and roll!
See, rock is a little joke, 'cause
you turn people to stone. Get...
Uh, OK.
Count me out. I'm
not up to it tonight.
Pardon?
You signed a contract, remember?
No pay, no play.
Don't I get any sick days?
OK. Why don't you tell
Unca Hades all about it,
and you'll feel much better.
Well... OK.
- There's this boy, and he's really cute.
- Medusa!
I know that voice.
- Hercules.
- Hercules?
That's the guy?
Correct me if I'm wrong.
But Hercules is
a hero, is he not?
And heroes kill
monsters like you.
- Am I wrong?
- Sure, he hurt my feelings,
but I don't think
he would kill me.
Oooogh! That's a
cute world you live in.
It really is. It's so nice.
Everybody gets along.
Wake up, little girl!
This kid is a gorgon-slayer.
Then, he's coming here to...
Duh.
No. No, I can't believe that.
OK. Hey, but if I were you,
I'd... turn him to stone.
Just a suggestion.
How's my head
look? Is it on straight?
Medusa!
Are you here?
- Come out!
- Go on, get outta here.
I can take care of myself.
All right, all right. I'll just
be over here if you need me.
I gotta see a man
about something.
Um, over here, Hercules.
Medusa?
Lose the shield, hero.
It's too dark to
see the monster.
Heh. I deserve that.
That's why I brought you this.
Ah-choo!
What...
Oops.
Ugh! You creep!
Hey. Hey, not my
fault. I got a cold.
Do I feel warm? I
feel, I feel warm, uh?
Look, he was clearly
going for his sword.
Come on.
Flowers?
He was coming to apologize.
Oh! What have I done?
Oops. Gee, guess
I misjudged the guy.
Gee, I feel awful.
- Oh, well.
- Ahem.
Uh, aren't you forgetting
something, Hades?
♪ Aphrodite ♪
Oy, Aprhodite,
again with the song.
Mm-hmm. Now, I don't know,
I'd say this qualifies
as "one true friend."
Make her human, loser.
Hey, if I could only
turn one person to stone,
I'm glad it was jerkules.
I hate that kid.
Bada-bing! Human time.
Whoa.
Wha... What happened?
Hey! Come on, no
fair. Interference.
Hey, what good is a
true friend if he's a rock?
Uh, look... I don't know
what all this is about,
but I came here on a mission.
Medusa, I, uh...
I know I've been
kinda, like, a jerk,
but I was wondering
if you'd like to, um...
go out with me tonight.
- Hmm?
- Yeah.
You know, I think
my calendar's clean.
Ha! Well, then, let's go.
Uh, hold on.
Um, I was just wondering if...
Oh, yeah, of course.
Hey, you go, girl.
I don't think we'll
be needing this.
Aw, that's so nice.
That's nice, huh?
Kids got together,
and, you know...
We're here... So, whadya think?
Shall we make it a
double date, huh?
Grrrr!
Heh! Hagh!
Hephaestus.
I... I'm sorry, ma'am.
What was your name again?
I was just chatting
with the nice lady.
I gotta go. I gotta
go shampoo my hair.
That's likely.