Hercules (1998–1999): Season 1, Episode 35 - Hercules and the Griffin - full transcript
The gang visits a retirement home, where they're each assigned a senior citizen to befriend. In an effort to connect with his assigned person, an old Griffin, Hercules accidentally reveals the treasured diamond the Griffin had been guarding for years; subsequently, the mountain gnomes king steals it.
♪ Who put the
"glad" in gladiator? ♪
♪ Hercules ♪
♪ Whose daring deeds
are great theater? ♪
♪ Hercules ♪
♪ Is he bold? ♪
♪ No one braver ♪
♪ Is he sweet? ♪
♪ Our favorite
flavor, Hercules ♪
- ♪ What a guy ♪
- ♪ Hercules ♪
- ♪ Ask his friends ♪
- ♪ Hercules ♪
♪ Honey, they won't lie ♪
- ♪ Hercules ♪
- ♪ Ahh, Hercules ♪
♪ Hercules ♪
- ♪ Come on ♪
- ♪ No one's fool ♪
♪ Now, the boy's in school ♪
♪ He's in trainin' ♪
♪ Sun is shinin' ♪
♪ And the nicest guy ♪
♪ No complainin' ♪
♪ He was a no one ♪
♪ Zero, zero, give
him a quick deed ♪
♪ He's our hero ♪
♪ He's the most
likely to succeed ♪
♪ From zero to hero ♪
♪ Herc is a hero ♪
♪ He'll be a hero ♪
Wait and see!
The aurora borealis...
The magical northern lights.
Many have beheld their beauty,
but few know the
remarkable story
behind this glorious,
shimmering display.
Well, surprise, surprise.
It begins at Prometheus Academy.
Doesn't everything?
Good morning, students.
Well, soon we will arrive at
the Elysian Sunset Resthome
to commence our ripping
adventure in volunteerism...
Not that you have a choice.
This is a golden opportunity
to spread youthful sunshine.
And it would look smashing
on your permanent record.
Here you will meet and
mingle with living legends,
and a few who just have
high opinions of themselves,
learn wisdom from your elders,
and acquire a taste for
strained baba ghanouj.
This trip will be a disaster.
Get your own curse.
Visions are my thing.
No vision... I just
know old people.
Well, I know of them.
Those liver spots
give me the willies.
- Ew!
- I think it's great.
Heroes do more
than fight monsters.
They also bring sunshine to
people in the sunset of their lives.
Yes, my friend.
There's a lot to be learned
from our esteemed elders.
- What?
- Well, like, uh... Like, uh...
Oh! If I'd listened
to my Daedalus
and not flown into the
sun with wax wings...
You wouldn't be famous for
doing something stupidly reckless.
Oh, man!
I was this close to wisdom.
This close!
The Elysian Sunset
Resthome, bastion of leisure
for legendary Greeks
like Tiresias the seer.
I used to have vast knowledge.
Now they pin my
room number on me.
And Nereus, a
once-powerful shape-shifter.
Time for your medicine, Nereus.
You can't make me swallow that.
I'm a lightning-fast cheetah.
Catch me if you can.
I am the wind! Argh!
This'll help that, too.
We've been getting complaints.
I predict that I'll be visited
by a sarcastic teenager.
She will sustain an injury.
Real good, gramps.
I got here ten minutes ago.
Ha ha ha.
Two for two.
Ha ha! OK.
Gorilla!
Great! Tarantula!
Super! Serpent!
Oh, yes, sir, you
floor me, Nereus!
Well done. Now dry
them, then trim my nails.
Adonis, aren't you
supposed to be helping him?
But I am.
I'm giving him
useful work to do...
Does wonders
for the self-esteem.
His, or yours?
It's a win-win.
OK, where is my assigned senior?
"Mr. Griff, room XXIII".
I told you I hate that
strained baba ghanouj!
Oh!
XX-ay-yi-yi.
- Hello?
- Tell me you walked into the wrong room,
and I won't throw
anything at you.
Well, no, but... Ah!
I've, uh, volunteered
my time to... Ah!
I'm here to... Ah!
Could you stop
throwing snowballs?
I... I... I brought food.
Is it candy?
No, it's good for you.
Oh.
You don't get many
visitors, do you?
On second thought,
anything's better than
that strained baba ghanouj.
Bring it up, sonny.
Uh! Ooh!
Hi! I'm Hercules, and I'm
here to brighten your day.
Uh, ya, you're one of them
sunshine Doofs, aren't you?
- Well, yeah! Yeah, I'm here to...
- Doof.
Ugh!
You have disturbed my slumber.
Prepare to face the flame.
Oh, gosh, I... I...
I'm really sorry.
I... I... Here, let
me help you up.
I'm not giving up! I'm gonna
bring you sunshine, Griff.
Thanks for the warning, Doof!
Operation sunshine, day two.
Can't eat flowers, Doof!
Day three.
Herc, have you seen Nereus?
I've been busy
being called a Doof.
We were having a great time,
and then he turned into a dolphin,
jumped out the window.
My guy won't even
come out of his room.
I made him lunch
to cheer him up.
Hope he likes tuna fish.
Oh, those were
the days, eh, Griffy?
Hephaestus?
God of the forge?
Hercules, come up here
and meet a living legend.
You know this kid, Heph?
Sure, that's Zeus' boy.
Really? Seems like a Doof.
All right, so,
Griff's a little gruff.
I can deal. I'm coming!
Let me give you a hand.
Uh, thanks.
Huh?
Yep, me and Griff go way back.
A long, long time ago,
I was fooling around
with a chunk of coal,
and I created what mortals
today call a diamond.
While I figured out
how to mass-produce,
I needed someone
to guard the original.
So I went to the best treasure
guardian in the business...
Griff!
Griff's worse enemy back then
was the king of the most
thievish folk in the world...
The Arismapsi.
Ooh, yes, that is a big rock.
Get it for me, will you?
Now, before I die
of unfulfilled longing!
Run, you little minions!
Uh-oh. No-o-o-o-o!
Ooh...
But no matter what he tried,
Griff foiled his plans.
I... I had a job to do.
Until finally the
old king gave up.
Heh heh heh.
That King Arismap
will never give up.
Wow, you're a hero.
You should be famous.
- Oh, I don't want to be famous.
- Oh, come on.
You're... You're
just being modest.
Everybody wants to be famous.
I said, "no!" Fame
is for... Doofs.
Oh! Ugh!
Hey, the Greekly World News!
Oh, take it.
Just please stop falling on me.
Homer, Greekly World News!
No, that's me... Homer,
Greekly World News.
Have I got a story for you,
one that... that must be told.
Yowza!
Why, that little...
Griff, have I got
a surprise for you!
One worse than this?
But, uh... y... you
made the front page.
I mean, you're a
celebrated hero!
Doesn't... Doesn't
that make you happy?
Do I look happy?
Let me nest in peace!
Whoa-a-a!
That's the one!
This is our hallway, fly boy!
Who-o-o-o-a!
Ah!
Ah! Move it! I was just putting
the moves on a curvaceous carp,
and you're sitting on her!
At last, I've found
that stinking Griffin.
The jewel finally will be mine.
Any of you minions
got a Lozenge?
Stop!
Put me down!
You're asking
for a real pecking.
Surprise!
It's a banquet in your honor.
I have to get back to my nest.
We're having roasted cockatrice.
Really? With toboli stuffing?
Not bad for a Doof, huh?
Well... Make mine to go.
Oh, come on, no way!
You're the Griffin of the hour.
You're making a pig
of yourself, Nereus.
Some spread, huh, Griff?
You deserve it.
You used to really be something.
Used to be?
Well, yeah, you
were a real hero!
I mean, back in your day.
My day?! What am I
now, chopped liver?
Chopped liver?
I didn't see that.
Load me up!
I'm having a vision...
Little one-eyed men
carting off a giant jewel!
What?
My... My nest.
What's the rush?
I had that vision
15 minutes ago.
Those thieves are
probably in Crete by now.
Wait, you'll miss dessert!
We made fanikia in
the shape of Griffins!
You were still
guarding the jewel?
I'm such a Doof.
It's gone. The jewel is gone.
The jewel was in your nest?
Still? After all these years?
How do you kids
say it these days?
"Duh!"
Well, Griff, nobody's perfect.
I was... Till operation
sunshine here.
You see, Hephaestus, I
made Griff leave his nest.
And... it was my fault
the Arismapsi found
him in the first place.
What? I... I... I've
confessed everything.
You're standing
on my tail... Doof!
Oh. Sorry.
Don't worry, Heph.
I'll get your jewel back.
Uh, take Hercules with you.
Just kill me now.
He's a good kid... strong, too.
Could come in handy in a pinch.
I want you two on
this mission together.
But he's o-o-o-o-o...
Uh, retired.
He'll slow me down.
He'll wander off. He'll...
He'll leave you behind if
you don't get a move on.
Huh? Hey! Hey! Wait up!
We aren't getting off
to a very good start.
What do you mean?
I got up to 10,000
feet in no time.
I'm gonna glide awhile.
I... I... I mean
working together.
Working together?
I don't want to
be seen together.
What is that get-up
you're wearing?
Oh, it's from
Mediterranean Mail.
It's part of their
polar-hero collection.
Some people get
way too many catalogs.
Listen, King Arismap's fortress
is just over this
mountain range.
But, uh, I'm...
I'm a little winded.
Maybe we should
rest here for a bit
before going into battle.
You know, us old
geezers, we, uh...
we need our, uh,
our, uh... naps.
Hey, great idea!
Perfect! As soon as he's asleep,
we'll sneak off and battle
King Arismap on our own.
Oh, yeah. Now, don't
let me sleep too long.
A couple hours downtime,
and I'll... I'll be raring to go.
OK, sure, yeah, sweet dreams.
O-o-o-o-oh!
Ha ha ha. Youngsters
are so... trusting.
Sorry, kid! I work better alone.
He's a crafty codger,
but he's still too old
for this hero stuff.
Come on, Pegasus!
We gotta save him.
Battle stations!
Prime the catapults!
This is a full minion alert!
Arismap, are you going
to hand over that jewel,
or do I have to
come in and get it?
Sorry, but I am not
receiving visitors today.
It'll take more than
a few snowballs
to freeze me out.
Well, how brave of you.
Well, all right, as long as
you've invited yourself over,
let me offer you a drink!
Oh... ugh!
They've got Griff!
Griff!
Don't worry, I'll free you.
They'll never capture
you with me around.
Wha... Stop it.
You're ruining my plan.
- Plan?
- I want to be taken inside.
Oh oh, I g... I get it!
It's a... it's a... it's a
Trojan-horse sort of thing?
Whatever.
Then I better let
myself get taken, too.
- O-o-o-oh.
- Ha ha ha ha ha.
Freezing water feels like a
thousand knives, eh, Doof?
Not what I had in mind.
Whoa! Who-o-o-o-o-a!
Ooh!
Oh! Good boy, Pegasus.
Oh, Griff, I can't tell you
how it pains me to
see you like this...
Because it doesn't!
I love it.
Lozenge?
Oh, no, thanks.
Now, once I release this rope,
the icicle will shatter you
like a drachma-store trinket.
Get it? Ha ha ha ha.
Uh, not before I flex my
mighty muscles and break free!
Ah!
I'll say this for the king...
He doesn't scrimp on minions.
I'm gonna be here all
week if I don't get some help.
You'd better be
right about this.
I'm telling you, I had a vision.
Griff's in trouble.
Well, you could have had
a vision about the weather.
I need a shawl!
Give it up.
You couldn't flex your way
out of a... very flimsy thing...
Let alone that ice
which isn't flimsy at all.
Ha ha ha ha ha.
I laugh.
Even your, your
insults have gotten tired.
If this takes any longer,
I'll have melted free.
Only because of all that
hot air you're blowing.
Oh, I need a breather.
Help me finish my crossword,
and we'll try again
later, all right?
Now, let me see.
I need a three-letter word
for large, flightless bird.
I got it.
That would be "you."
Hmm... y-o-u.
When you need a word
for a one-eyed old geezer
who can't pull a
rope, let me know.
One-eyed, am I? Ha ha.
Well, I don't need
depth perception to... ah!
As a shivering hero-in-training,
I insist you give up.
There's no use running.
There... really is...
no use running.
Minions, seize him!
Don't count on your
minions for help.
They're a little busy
at the moment. Ah!
- Rrr... take that!
- I told you I had a vision.
Ooh, oh, here... here
comes another one.
Hercules, skate!
Listen, you, no fair coaching.
Hey, this should be a sport.
We'll see who has the last
laugh when you're all tied-up.
We certainly will.
No, kid. Don't!
"Don't" isn't in my vocabulary.
Oh!
Oops.
Or is it "Can't?"
"Don't" I should listen to.
Whoa!
Do you have any idea
how much false beaks cost?
That was evil.
Alas, the pain. Oh, my bursitis.
This is abuse.
Ooh, I'm... I'm sorry. I...
I... I... I... I didn't mean to...
Yes, well, if you could just
retrieve my ooh-ah ointment
out of that bag.
Oh, yeah, sure, sure.
- This bag?
- No, Hercules, don't!
Who-o-o-oa!
Boy, I'm gonna need
that ooh-ah ointment.
Ah! Destroy him
carefully, you fool!
Can't breathe!
I am the wind.
I keep telling you to stay away
from that strained baba ghanouj.
Not that wind.
Come on, take on
someone your own age.
Wow.
The Griff-man's still got it.
And now that I've
caught my breath...
Hey, that's it!
Kitchy-kitchy.
No!
My jewel!
Oops.
Ooh! Aah!
Look out!
Don't worry, I'm ready
to go another 10 rounds.
Me, too.
Ha ha ha ha.
Still got it.
So do I.
Did the kid tell
you I had a vision?
Ooh, I'm on a roll.
Here comes another one.
Angry deity incoming.
Hephaestus... hope
he's not too mad.
Let me know.
I'll be over here away
from ground zero.
Be something fast!
Fast!
Is that what I think it is?
He did it! He did
it! All his fault!
Hmm. Well, not
what I had in mind...
A little busy.
Hmm... sparkle...
Please? Please?
- Please?
- But I like it!
I like it!
Showy, yet tasteful.
Now everyone can enjoy it.
Yes!
My precious jewel... gone.
I have nothing to steal...
No reason to be evil.
Oh, come on. Buck up.
You're brimming with evil.
You think? Oh, thank you.
Definitely!
And I've faced some evil...
- Hey! Butt out, Doof.
- Whoa-a-a!
Maybe you're right, Griff.
Of course I'm right.
You can't retire.
I need a worthy foe.
F... Foe?
For what?
For shuffleboard.
Every afternoon at the home,
winner gets the
unstrained baba ghanouj.
Bet I can take you.
Over my dead body.
Well, at your age, I wouldn't
have to wait too long.
Oh, yeah, well,
look who's talking...
Antique beak.
- Oh, yeah?
- Yeah.
"glad" in gladiator? ♪
♪ Hercules ♪
♪ Whose daring deeds
are great theater? ♪
♪ Hercules ♪
♪ Is he bold? ♪
♪ No one braver ♪
♪ Is he sweet? ♪
♪ Our favorite
flavor, Hercules ♪
- ♪ What a guy ♪
- ♪ Hercules ♪
- ♪ Ask his friends ♪
- ♪ Hercules ♪
♪ Honey, they won't lie ♪
- ♪ Hercules ♪
- ♪ Ahh, Hercules ♪
♪ Hercules ♪
- ♪ Come on ♪
- ♪ No one's fool ♪
♪ Now, the boy's in school ♪
♪ He's in trainin' ♪
♪ Sun is shinin' ♪
♪ And the nicest guy ♪
♪ No complainin' ♪
♪ He was a no one ♪
♪ Zero, zero, give
him a quick deed ♪
♪ He's our hero ♪
♪ He's the most
likely to succeed ♪
♪ From zero to hero ♪
♪ Herc is a hero ♪
♪ He'll be a hero ♪
Wait and see!
The aurora borealis...
The magical northern lights.
Many have beheld their beauty,
but few know the
remarkable story
behind this glorious,
shimmering display.
Well, surprise, surprise.
It begins at Prometheus Academy.
Doesn't everything?
Good morning, students.
Well, soon we will arrive at
the Elysian Sunset Resthome
to commence our ripping
adventure in volunteerism...
Not that you have a choice.
This is a golden opportunity
to spread youthful sunshine.
And it would look smashing
on your permanent record.
Here you will meet and
mingle with living legends,
and a few who just have
high opinions of themselves,
learn wisdom from your elders,
and acquire a taste for
strained baba ghanouj.
This trip will be a disaster.
Get your own curse.
Visions are my thing.
No vision... I just
know old people.
Well, I know of them.
Those liver spots
give me the willies.
- Ew!
- I think it's great.
Heroes do more
than fight monsters.
They also bring sunshine to
people in the sunset of their lives.
Yes, my friend.
There's a lot to be learned
from our esteemed elders.
- What?
- Well, like, uh... Like, uh...
Oh! If I'd listened
to my Daedalus
and not flown into the
sun with wax wings...
You wouldn't be famous for
doing something stupidly reckless.
Oh, man!
I was this close to wisdom.
This close!
The Elysian Sunset
Resthome, bastion of leisure
for legendary Greeks
like Tiresias the seer.
I used to have vast knowledge.
Now they pin my
room number on me.
And Nereus, a
once-powerful shape-shifter.
Time for your medicine, Nereus.
You can't make me swallow that.
I'm a lightning-fast cheetah.
Catch me if you can.
I am the wind! Argh!
This'll help that, too.
We've been getting complaints.
I predict that I'll be visited
by a sarcastic teenager.
She will sustain an injury.
Real good, gramps.
I got here ten minutes ago.
Ha ha ha.
Two for two.
Ha ha! OK.
Gorilla!
Great! Tarantula!
Super! Serpent!
Oh, yes, sir, you
floor me, Nereus!
Well done. Now dry
them, then trim my nails.
Adonis, aren't you
supposed to be helping him?
But I am.
I'm giving him
useful work to do...
Does wonders
for the self-esteem.
His, or yours?
It's a win-win.
OK, where is my assigned senior?
"Mr. Griff, room XXIII".
I told you I hate that
strained baba ghanouj!
Oh!
XX-ay-yi-yi.
- Hello?
- Tell me you walked into the wrong room,
and I won't throw
anything at you.
Well, no, but... Ah!
I've, uh, volunteered
my time to... Ah!
I'm here to... Ah!
Could you stop
throwing snowballs?
I... I... I brought food.
Is it candy?
No, it's good for you.
Oh.
You don't get many
visitors, do you?
On second thought,
anything's better than
that strained baba ghanouj.
Bring it up, sonny.
Uh! Ooh!
Hi! I'm Hercules, and I'm
here to brighten your day.
Uh, ya, you're one of them
sunshine Doofs, aren't you?
- Well, yeah! Yeah, I'm here to...
- Doof.
Ugh!
You have disturbed my slumber.
Prepare to face the flame.
Oh, gosh, I... I...
I'm really sorry.
I... I... Here, let
me help you up.
I'm not giving up! I'm gonna
bring you sunshine, Griff.
Thanks for the warning, Doof!
Operation sunshine, day two.
Can't eat flowers, Doof!
Day three.
Herc, have you seen Nereus?
I've been busy
being called a Doof.
We were having a great time,
and then he turned into a dolphin,
jumped out the window.
My guy won't even
come out of his room.
I made him lunch
to cheer him up.
Hope he likes tuna fish.
Oh, those were
the days, eh, Griffy?
Hephaestus?
God of the forge?
Hercules, come up here
and meet a living legend.
You know this kid, Heph?
Sure, that's Zeus' boy.
Really? Seems like a Doof.
All right, so,
Griff's a little gruff.
I can deal. I'm coming!
Let me give you a hand.
Uh, thanks.
Huh?
Yep, me and Griff go way back.
A long, long time ago,
I was fooling around
with a chunk of coal,
and I created what mortals
today call a diamond.
While I figured out
how to mass-produce,
I needed someone
to guard the original.
So I went to the best treasure
guardian in the business...
Griff!
Griff's worse enemy back then
was the king of the most
thievish folk in the world...
The Arismapsi.
Ooh, yes, that is a big rock.
Get it for me, will you?
Now, before I die
of unfulfilled longing!
Run, you little minions!
Uh-oh. No-o-o-o-o!
Ooh...
But no matter what he tried,
Griff foiled his plans.
I... I had a job to do.
Until finally the
old king gave up.
Heh heh heh.
That King Arismap
will never give up.
Wow, you're a hero.
You should be famous.
- Oh, I don't want to be famous.
- Oh, come on.
You're... You're
just being modest.
Everybody wants to be famous.
I said, "no!" Fame
is for... Doofs.
Oh! Ugh!
Hey, the Greekly World News!
Oh, take it.
Just please stop falling on me.
Homer, Greekly World News!
No, that's me... Homer,
Greekly World News.
Have I got a story for you,
one that... that must be told.
Yowza!
Why, that little...
Griff, have I got
a surprise for you!
One worse than this?
But, uh... y... you
made the front page.
I mean, you're a
celebrated hero!
Doesn't... Doesn't
that make you happy?
Do I look happy?
Let me nest in peace!
Whoa-a-a!
That's the one!
This is our hallway, fly boy!
Who-o-o-o-a!
Ah!
Ah! Move it! I was just putting
the moves on a curvaceous carp,
and you're sitting on her!
At last, I've found
that stinking Griffin.
The jewel finally will be mine.
Any of you minions
got a Lozenge?
Stop!
Put me down!
You're asking
for a real pecking.
Surprise!
It's a banquet in your honor.
I have to get back to my nest.
We're having roasted cockatrice.
Really? With toboli stuffing?
Not bad for a Doof, huh?
Well... Make mine to go.
Oh, come on, no way!
You're the Griffin of the hour.
You're making a pig
of yourself, Nereus.
Some spread, huh, Griff?
You deserve it.
You used to really be something.
Used to be?
Well, yeah, you
were a real hero!
I mean, back in your day.
My day?! What am I
now, chopped liver?
Chopped liver?
I didn't see that.
Load me up!
I'm having a vision...
Little one-eyed men
carting off a giant jewel!
What?
My... My nest.
What's the rush?
I had that vision
15 minutes ago.
Those thieves are
probably in Crete by now.
Wait, you'll miss dessert!
We made fanikia in
the shape of Griffins!
You were still
guarding the jewel?
I'm such a Doof.
It's gone. The jewel is gone.
The jewel was in your nest?
Still? After all these years?
How do you kids
say it these days?
"Duh!"
Well, Griff, nobody's perfect.
I was... Till operation
sunshine here.
You see, Hephaestus, I
made Griff leave his nest.
And... it was my fault
the Arismapsi found
him in the first place.
What? I... I... I've
confessed everything.
You're standing
on my tail... Doof!
Oh. Sorry.
Don't worry, Heph.
I'll get your jewel back.
Uh, take Hercules with you.
Just kill me now.
He's a good kid... strong, too.
Could come in handy in a pinch.
I want you two on
this mission together.
But he's o-o-o-o-o...
Uh, retired.
He'll slow me down.
He'll wander off. He'll...
He'll leave you behind if
you don't get a move on.
Huh? Hey! Hey! Wait up!
We aren't getting off
to a very good start.
What do you mean?
I got up to 10,000
feet in no time.
I'm gonna glide awhile.
I... I... I mean
working together.
Working together?
I don't want to
be seen together.
What is that get-up
you're wearing?
Oh, it's from
Mediterranean Mail.
It's part of their
polar-hero collection.
Some people get
way too many catalogs.
Listen, King Arismap's fortress
is just over this
mountain range.
But, uh, I'm...
I'm a little winded.
Maybe we should
rest here for a bit
before going into battle.
You know, us old
geezers, we, uh...
we need our, uh,
our, uh... naps.
Hey, great idea!
Perfect! As soon as he's asleep,
we'll sneak off and battle
King Arismap on our own.
Oh, yeah. Now, don't
let me sleep too long.
A couple hours downtime,
and I'll... I'll be raring to go.
OK, sure, yeah, sweet dreams.
O-o-o-o-oh!
Ha ha ha. Youngsters
are so... trusting.
Sorry, kid! I work better alone.
He's a crafty codger,
but he's still too old
for this hero stuff.
Come on, Pegasus!
We gotta save him.
Battle stations!
Prime the catapults!
This is a full minion alert!
Arismap, are you going
to hand over that jewel,
or do I have to
come in and get it?
Sorry, but I am not
receiving visitors today.
It'll take more than
a few snowballs
to freeze me out.
Well, how brave of you.
Well, all right, as long as
you've invited yourself over,
let me offer you a drink!
Oh... ugh!
They've got Griff!
Griff!
Don't worry, I'll free you.
They'll never capture
you with me around.
Wha... Stop it.
You're ruining my plan.
- Plan?
- I want to be taken inside.
Oh oh, I g... I get it!
It's a... it's a... it's a
Trojan-horse sort of thing?
Whatever.
Then I better let
myself get taken, too.
- O-o-o-oh.
- Ha ha ha ha ha.
Freezing water feels like a
thousand knives, eh, Doof?
Not what I had in mind.
Whoa! Who-o-o-o-o-a!
Ooh!
Oh! Good boy, Pegasus.
Oh, Griff, I can't tell you
how it pains me to
see you like this...
Because it doesn't!
I love it.
Lozenge?
Oh, no, thanks.
Now, once I release this rope,
the icicle will shatter you
like a drachma-store trinket.
Get it? Ha ha ha ha.
Uh, not before I flex my
mighty muscles and break free!
Ah!
I'll say this for the king...
He doesn't scrimp on minions.
I'm gonna be here all
week if I don't get some help.
You'd better be
right about this.
I'm telling you, I had a vision.
Griff's in trouble.
Well, you could have had
a vision about the weather.
I need a shawl!
Give it up.
You couldn't flex your way
out of a... very flimsy thing...
Let alone that ice
which isn't flimsy at all.
Ha ha ha ha ha.
I laugh.
Even your, your
insults have gotten tired.
If this takes any longer,
I'll have melted free.
Only because of all that
hot air you're blowing.
Oh, I need a breather.
Help me finish my crossword,
and we'll try again
later, all right?
Now, let me see.
I need a three-letter word
for large, flightless bird.
I got it.
That would be "you."
Hmm... y-o-u.
When you need a word
for a one-eyed old geezer
who can't pull a
rope, let me know.
One-eyed, am I? Ha ha.
Well, I don't need
depth perception to... ah!
As a shivering hero-in-training,
I insist you give up.
There's no use running.
There... really is...
no use running.
Minions, seize him!
Don't count on your
minions for help.
They're a little busy
at the moment. Ah!
- Rrr... take that!
- I told you I had a vision.
Ooh, oh, here... here
comes another one.
Hercules, skate!
Listen, you, no fair coaching.
Hey, this should be a sport.
We'll see who has the last
laugh when you're all tied-up.
We certainly will.
No, kid. Don't!
"Don't" isn't in my vocabulary.
Oh!
Oops.
Or is it "Can't?"
"Don't" I should listen to.
Whoa!
Do you have any idea
how much false beaks cost?
That was evil.
Alas, the pain. Oh, my bursitis.
This is abuse.
Ooh, I'm... I'm sorry. I...
I... I... I... I didn't mean to...
Yes, well, if you could just
retrieve my ooh-ah ointment
out of that bag.
Oh, yeah, sure, sure.
- This bag?
- No, Hercules, don't!
Who-o-o-oa!
Boy, I'm gonna need
that ooh-ah ointment.
Ah! Destroy him
carefully, you fool!
Can't breathe!
I am the wind.
I keep telling you to stay away
from that strained baba ghanouj.
Not that wind.
Come on, take on
someone your own age.
Wow.
The Griff-man's still got it.
And now that I've
caught my breath...
Hey, that's it!
Kitchy-kitchy.
No!
My jewel!
Oops.
Ooh! Aah!
Look out!
Don't worry, I'm ready
to go another 10 rounds.
Me, too.
Ha ha ha ha.
Still got it.
So do I.
Did the kid tell
you I had a vision?
Ooh, I'm on a roll.
Here comes another one.
Angry deity incoming.
Hephaestus... hope
he's not too mad.
Let me know.
I'll be over here away
from ground zero.
Be something fast!
Fast!
Is that what I think it is?
He did it! He did
it! All his fault!
Hmm. Well, not
what I had in mind...
A little busy.
Hmm... sparkle...
Please? Please?
- Please?
- But I like it!
I like it!
Showy, yet tasteful.
Now everyone can enjoy it.
Yes!
My precious jewel... gone.
I have nothing to steal...
No reason to be evil.
Oh, come on. Buck up.
You're brimming with evil.
You think? Oh, thank you.
Definitely!
And I've faced some evil...
- Hey! Butt out, Doof.
- Whoa-a-a!
Maybe you're right, Griff.
Of course I'm right.
You can't retire.
I need a worthy foe.
F... Foe?
For what?
For shuffleboard.
Every afternoon at the home,
winner gets the
unstrained baba ghanouj.
Bet I can take you.
Over my dead body.
Well, at your age, I wouldn't
have to wait too long.
Oh, yeah, well,
look who's talking...
Antique beak.
- Oh, yeah?
- Yeah.