Hart of Dixie (2011–2015): Season 2, Episode 13 - Lovesick Blues - full transcript
Tipped off that a neighboring village is about to post a commercial for its strawberries, George volunteers to direct one a day earlier on Lavon's shoestring budget, starring the mayor. As an influenza epidemic is closing in on Bluebell, Zoe is appoint quarantine captain. Wade and Zoe agree they don't have to do everything together, so she needs not accompany him on concert with his band, even with his siren ex Lily Anne Lonergan. The flu ruins everyone's plans, even Lemon's elaborate dinner for Walter, yet Zoe's greatest shock is who brought it in and why.
I know that you've been known to
comment on the mayor's physique,
but I didn't...
Yeah, I like him!
And I'm divorced now,
so who's to say he won't like me back?
We were in love once, and Lord help me,
I still think I am.
Forget about about Lavon.
You've got Walt.
Mayor Hayes and I are friends,
but we both belong elsewhere.
Glad to hear it.
I've never had a real
relationship, Wade.
I don't know how to do this.
Me neither.
Sometimes you just got to wing it.
We're gonna drive each
other crazy sometimes.
But you got to remember, that's part of
what brought us together
in the first place.
MAN (deep voice):
Juices.
WOMAN (sexy voice):
Strawberries.
Get your fill in Fillmore.
MAN:
Sweet.
WOMAN:
Strawberries.
Get your fill in Fillmore.
WOMAN: All the strawberries
you could ever desire.
It's strawberry season in Fillmore.
Come and get your fill.
WOMAN:
Strawberries.
Fillmore made a damn commercial?
My pal at WYET snuck me that copy.
Bluebell's been the number one
Alabama destination
for strawberry picking forever.
I know.
Mayor Gainey's trying to
hijack our berry business.
Looks like he might just get it, too.
Ah, yep. Just like
he stole our Mardi Gras.
Mm.
Sneaky bastard.
That he is.
That he is.
This commercial running already?
No, it doesn't air for
another three days.
But, you know, I had a thought. Hmm?
I ever tell you what I did
freshman year at college?
You about to confess something
I don't want to hear about?
I took a filmmaking class.
Why don't we just make
our own commercial?
You-you think
you can do that?
I won awards in that class.
Huh.
Can you have it ready in three days?
I can have it ready in two.
No, you were right, this
is a nice change of pace
from breakfast at Lavon's.
However...
The eggs do taste a little bit
like beer, don't they?
Mm-hmm.
Oh, hey, before I forget,
do you want me
to put your name
on the list for tonight?
Your show?
That's tonight?
Yeah, Mattress Police Live in Daphne.
All the cool kids are gonna be there.
(sighs) You know, it's just,
it's such a crazy week.
Brick's gone, so I'm on call.
Hey, but if you need me there
to do he whole "I'm
with the band thing..""
Trust me, I don't, all right?
I don't need you to be my groupie.
And I don't need you to be mine.
That's kind of what makes us awesome.
To not being a couple
that needs to do everything together.
To not wearing matching shirts
or eating off each other's plates.
(phone vibrating)
(clears throat)
It's the Alabama Department of Health.
I got to go.
Uh, you mind if
I finish your hash browns?
What did I just say?
Well...
AnnaBeth, I need some advice.
Mm-hmm.
It's Walt.
I feel that there's a storm
on the horizon of our relationship.
He just called me and
invited himself over
to make dinner tomorrow
before he goes out of town.
Oh, my God.
I know.
He wants to make me dinner.
I mean, that's code for that
he hates my cooking, right?
I mean, it's over.
I don't think so.
Sweetie, he wants to have sex.
But are you sure?
Isn't that fast?
I mean, we've only been dating
for a little more than eight weeks.
Eigh... eight weeks?
Mm-hmm.
Sweetie, remember when
we were watching the Olympics
and those opening
ceremonies went on forever?
Yes, and we were like,
when are we gonna see some gymnastics?
Exactly. Trust me,
eight weeks is long enough.
Oh, my God.
This is something
that you want to do, right?
What?
Well, hell yes!
Oh, my God.
Whew!
Suddenly I'm nervous.
I feel like I should do some Pilates
or toning or refinish my floors or...
Is that normal?
Some of that, mm-hmm.
(gasps) Why can't it be
tomorrow night already?
(giggles)
Okay, not to put any pressure on you,
but I want to be wild.
This commercial has got to
drive the mayor of Fillmore
to tears of despair.
Well, then, prepare to be wowed.
(grunts)
We open on you, the mayor, Lavon Hayes,
just strolling down the road,
as you happen upon a stranded tourist,
who just wants to pick strawberries.
I'm intrigued.
Her car's broken down.
She's lost.
She's confused.
But you take her by the hand
and lead her right into...
(snapping fingers)
Tom, card.
Sorry, I got caught up in the drama.
Into the town of BlueBell,
which comes alive before your eyes.
A strawberry paradise.
As strawberry vines reach
for miles across the skyline.
Strawberry novelty cars
motor down the street.
Animated strawberries
float through the air.
We'll do that with green screen.
And, oh,
what's that sound?
Is that Taylor Swift?
What is she singing?
That's right.
You guessed it.
"Strawberry Fields Forever."
As the two of you
get into a giant,
strawberry-shaped
hot air balloon,
you begin to float away
as the residents of BlueBell
assemble below you, smiling, happy,
waving and shouting...
BOTH: "BlueBell, it's yours
for the picking!"
Wow.
That sounds amazing.
You can do all this in two days?
Yes, as long as I have
mandatory town participation,
$1.2 million,
Taylor Swift and a crane.
(laughs)
Uh, (clears throat)
I want this, George,
but the best I can do is, uh,
$378, whoever we can convince
from the town to help out
and my step stool from the garage.
Deal.
(laughs)
Ah, remember,
this has to be kick-ass.
You have my word.
Fillmore ass will be kicked.
(cell phone ringtone playing)
Oh, excuse me.
Of course.
Hey, Zoe.
What's going on?
It's the flu.
Department of Health called
doctors all over the state.
See the red dots?
Confirmed outbreaks.
Mobile, Daphne, Fairhope.
It's closing in.
The flu can't hit BlueBell, Zoe.
It'll cripple our commercial.
Yeah.
Oh, and-and the health
of the town.
Yeah.
I was on E.R. rotation
in New York during H1N1;
that was scary stuff.
Okay, how do you want to handle it?
As the acting medical captain
of the S.S. BlueBell,
I've called for reinforcements.
Rose!
What do you need, Captain?
We need an inventory of supplies.
Antivirals, hydration fluids,
pain relievers...
Why the mask?
You sick already?
No, but I have tickets
to the Black Keys
in Gulf Shores tomorrow night
and my mom is finally gonna let me go.
I'm not taking any chances.
By the way, last mask.
Add it to the list.
LEMON: Did you even hear
a word that I said?
Blah, blah, blah, you can't
stay over tomorrow night,
even though you promised
Daddy that you would.
I have very important,
preexisting plans.
I will be unreachable.
Let me guess.
You and Walt gonna play
Chutes and Ladders all night?
You know what? Why don't
I get you a babysitter.
I'll just call Delma.
No.
Lemon, I am 15 years old.
I do not need a babysitter.
Are you sure?
I'm gonna sit at home,
watch TV all night, and then go to bed.
If I need you, I will text you.
Fine.
But don't need me.
(door closes)
Tina? Magnolia.
Party at my house tomorrow night.
Tell everyone.
ROSE:
I don't get it.
If my boyfriend were in a band,
I would just die every night
I couldn't be in the front row.
Well, that's because
you are in high school.
With me and Wade, it's not like that.
I should call him
and check in on him though.
How are the signs coming?
"Screw the flu,
wash your hands."
Great, it's pithy and it rhymes.
We'll put it up in all the
public restrooms, restaurants...
WADE: Hey.
Hey, what's up, Bon Jovi?
Oh, you know, usual rock star stuff:
hookers, drugs.
About to do sound check.
What you up to?
We are all on flu watch.
But I thought I'd call
to say good luck.
Shake that skinny butt, Kinsella.
Sound ain't gonna check itself.
ZOE:
Who was that?
That sounded like...
Lily Anne.
Think you two have met, right?
Lily Anne Lonergan?
Your wack-a-doo
ex-bandmate who used to be
in love with you?
You didn't tell me
you were playing with her.
Oh, I sure did.
I told you
it's a Mattress Police reunion.
It's not my fault you can't remember
who's in the band.
Come on! You know I get
superstitious about sound check.
(sighs) Look, baby, I better go
before Lily Anne's head explodes
into a fine mist of antidepressants
and grapefruit juice.
I'll call you later, all right?
Bye.
Holy cannoli!
Wade's performing with
Lily Anne Lonergan,
and you're not there?
That's trouble.
No!
No, it's fine.
It's not fine.
A girl like that is
capable of anything.
Lily Anne Lonergan
is super hot and super crazy.
It's like every guy's dream combo.
(door opens)
Zoe, I got a solution.
We need to talk.
In private.
What am I looking at?
BlueBell town bylaws, clause 13C:
the infectious disease ordinance.
In a state of emergency, the mayor
and the Board of
Health director--
that's you until
Brick comes back--
have the power to invoke
a medical quarantine.
Meaning?
We close the border
of BlueBell for 48 hours.
Close the border?
This is all because of your commercial.
Well, sure it's for the commercial.
But it's also for the health
and welfare of BlueBell.
It's for you, for me,
it's for all of us.
For 48 hours, no one goes out,
no one comes in.
Not even someone
who might be out of town
with their super-hot-but-kind-
of-crazy ex-girlfriend?
You want to fight the flu?
This is the best weapon we got.
(sighs)
+
(doorbell rings)
Lemon.
What's wrong?
The worst thing imaginable:
my romantic future is on life support.
Did you hear about
this immoral quarantine
being imposed upon our town
by Zoe Hart and Mayor Hayes?
Once again, big government
just reaching into our bedroom.
Yeah, they're trying
to keep the flu away.
I don't care about the flu.
I care about tomorrow night.
And if no one can get into
town, then Walt can't...
What if you postpone?
No, there will be no postponing.
You yourself said that
eight weeks is pushing it.
And Walt's going out of town,
and what if he comes back
no longer interested?
Okay, settle down.
Do you want me to get a bag
for you to breathe into?
We need to stop this quarantine.
Okay, um, mm.
Did you read the fine print here?
No. My eyes were
blurry with rage.
They're required to hold a town meeting
to vote on the quarantine,
to listen to opposing points of view.
It's all very democratic.
Great.
Let's go let the freedom ring.
Historically, quarantine has proven
very effective in
limiting the transmissions
of communicable diseases.
Boring.
Now, come on, now, we are
falling asleep back here.
Okay, look people, um,
think of the quarantine
as a giant shark net,
and the flu is like
a hungry great white,
desperate to eat
the people of BlueBell.
Now, it's out there, people.
But I just bought my tickets
to see the Globetrotters in Daphne.
My Zumba class is out of town.
48 hours
is like 48 weeks.
(crowd clamoring)
Mr. Mayor!
Are we or are we not in America?
Course we're in America, but...
Well, then here
in America, we have rights.
The right to come
and go as we please.
Yeah. Uh, the freedom of...
movement. GEORGE: Mr. Mayor,
if I may interject.
That one is actually not
in the Bill of Rights, and...
Was I talking to you?!
(crowd oohing)
Let's just get back to the point.
Will there be any exceptions
to this quarantine?
What kind of exceptions?
Um, just spitballing,
uh, let's say that
somebody needs an emergency
organ transplant.
ANNABETH: Right!
And the only organ
available is an organ...
out of town.
Yep.
Actually, I-I think
that's a great idea.
It is?
Medically speaking,
I think that it would be
reasonable for someone
to enter town if they can
show proof of a flu vaccine.
I second that motion!
You sure about this?
Captain of the
S.S. BlueBell.
All right, all those
in favor, say "aye."
ALL:
Aye!
You might just have
a future in politics.
Hey, uh, Lavon?
Hey, uh, this commercial, uh...
We really need to cast our girl.
The role of this tourist
is key, and we need
real chemistry, so I was
thinking, I don't know, Wanda,
maybe Babs Foster,
uh, Susie the hairdresser...
It should be AnnaBeth.
Eh, AnnaBeth,
I-I just don't...
I don't see...
What just happened?
You want me to be in
a commercial with you?
I-I don't know.
Well, it's important
to the town that this part be played
by someone with an appealing energy.
A face that the audience
can't help but fall in love with.
Ain't that right, George?
Yes, yes, of course,
but we should discuss it.
Yeah, I'll do it.
I-I mean,
if it's important to the town.
Great. Rehearsal
first thing tomorrow,
town square.
(chuckles):
Okay!
(quietly):
All right!
Okay, yeah, we really need
to work on our collaborative process.
You and AnnaBeth--
am I missing something here?
I just want what's best for the town.
Oh, really? Why don't you look
me in the eyes and say that?
Oh, my goodness!
AnnaBeth, Mayor Hayes
is totally into you.
What? No.
I-I don't think...
"A face you can't help
but fall in love with." Come on!
It doesn't matter.
There is no world in which
I could pursue a relationship
with a man Lemon once loved.
It's basic girl code.
Yes, that's true.
Girl code.
Are you still gonna do the commercial?
Well, it wouldn't be
fair to deny the world
my appealing energy.
ZOE:
Please tell me
that you're kidding.
Well, I could, but I'd be lying.
You never got a flu shot?
I just passed a vaccine
exception to the quarantine
so that you could...
Who doesn't get a flu shot?!
Me, all right? And you know
what else I've never gotten?
The flu.
You do the math, Doc.
Idiot! You do the math.
Now you can't come home for 48 hours.
Please, it's not like
I got to cross a moat.
All right?
Who's gonna know?
Me. I'll know. And it's the law.
You just played a concert
in the middle of Flu-Ville.
Well, I guess I will
have to sleep here, then.
Where exactly is "here"?
(Lily Anne speaking indistinctly)
On... a couch.
Whose couch?
(groans quietly)
It's, uh, Lily Anne's couch.
Look, don't freak out.
Me and Lily Anne,
we're ancient history.
Great. You enjoy that couch.
But don't even think
about all the other things
that you should've
been vaccinated against
before sleeping on it.
Just like old times.
(clears throat) No, not until you, uh,
throw a beer bottle at my head,
it shatters against the wall,
and the neighbors call the police.
(laughs)
Uh...
hey, listen, if it's
any trouble, Ie, an...
get a hotel or...
Since when can you afford a hotel?
Well, by "hotel," I mean
I could sleep in my car.
(laughs)
I'm happy to have the company.
Uh...
(clears throat)
Lily Anne, just...
so everything's on the table, uh,
I'm still with Zoe.
(laughs):
The doctor, right?
The one who said
you couldn't come home tonight?
Yeah, I know.
I just say it because...
Well, just so everything's
on the table,
you should know this couch
is really uncomfortable.
Oh.
(chuckles)
That makes two of us.
+
See, BlueBell's not just
a place to pick strawberries.
No, BlueBell is a whole experience.
You have to say that;
you're the mayor.
Well, don't just take my word for it.
Cue the fire truck!
ALL:
BlueBell!
It's yours for the picking!
Cue the human pyramid!
ALL:
BlueBell!
It's yours for the picking!
Cue the hot air balloon!
Hot air balloon!
Cut on rehearsal!
Cody! Cody, where's
the hot air balloon?
Sorry, George.
My cousin never called me back,
but I can get you
a bouncy house by noon.
A bouncy house?
Mm-hmm.
Is this a joke?
Okay, take ten minutes, everybody,
while I process my disappointment.
Lavon, AnnaBeth...
Chemistry, wow.
You were not lying.
I'd love to see even
more of it, though.
Uh, you're the director.
Whatever you need.
Hey, A.B., you are
falling for this town.
Don't be afraid of physical contact.
You know, grab his arm.
Lavon, touch her back.
We are selling a feeling here.
Mm-hmm.
LAVON:
Yeah.
What the hell?
Charlie, Charlie, hey!
Hey, buddy, uh, these are,
these are not lunch.
These are workin' pies.
Sorry.
Yeah.
Yeah, uh, props!
Props, we need some more pies!
LAVON:
S-So, uh,
you want to practice our lines, or...?
I-I actually have
somewhere to be.
Oh, no, that's fine.
We don't have to...
But maybe we can meet later.
I mean, to practice.
Only if you...
Maybe around dinnertime.
Uh, we can do it at my place.
Maybe around 6:00?
Great!
All right. Okay, uh,
toodle-oo. Okay.
Toodle-oo!
Oh, actually, I got to...
Yeah, I'm this way.
All right.
Wade, it's me.
I haven't heard from you all day.
Give me a call. Bye.
(sneezes)
Cody, I heard that.
Step away from the licorice.
What, Doc?
It's just allergies.
Put your hands where I can see 'em.
All right, come back to the
office with me. Let's go!
(sighs) My seats were fifth row.
You'd have been close enough
to see the Black Keys sweat.
Uh, how many times do we
have to hear about this?
I just wish I had something
to get my mind off my disappointment.
Right. If only someone were
having a party or something.
Fine, I'll send you an evite.
(squeals) Oh, my God!
We're going to a Breeland party!
Just don't invite any
of your loser friends.
Ooh, Red Vines--
my favorite.
So, I think I have tonight covered.
I have my Mozart Is for Lovers CD,
I have the table set,
and I've narrowed it down
to two outfits--
the pantsuit or...
a skort and a cardy.
What do you think?
I-I... Uh, is that
your fine china?
Uh-huh.
Lemon, I say this with love,
but every one of your choices is wrong.
I'm sorry.
Every one?
Tonight is not a dinner party,
it's sex.
That means candles, clothes that
come off quickly, replace Mozart
with Rosanne Cash, and, dear God,
lose the fine china.
But I never get to use it.
Sweetie, if everything
goes the way it ought to,
those dishes will be swept
to the floor with great force.
You think that we might, um...
on the table?
I certainly hope so.
I want you to be prepared.
Any surface is fair game.
I just want tonight to be perfect.
I used to be good at this, I swear.
It used to be like second
nature, and now I don't have
the right lights, the right
music, the right clothes.
Lemon, it's gonna be okay.
I don't even have
the right plates for sex.
I have everything you need.
Why don't you take a short nap,
get your head together,
and then come over to my place.
AnnaBeth.
Hmm?
You are the best,
most loyal friend in the whole world.
I don't know what I'd do without you.
(whispers):
Thank you.
George? It's AnnaBeth.
I have to pull out of the commercial.
I-I think
I'm coming down with the flu.
Please pass on my regrets to Lavon.
CODY:
Are you sure?
This is a hundred percent accurate.
It's the flu.
What happened?
Did you violate quarantine?
No.
I haven't left town in months.
All right,
well, go home and straight to bed.
Don't talk to anyone;
don't breathe on anyone.
Lots of aspirin and fluids.
Yes, ma'am.
(sighs)
(line ringing)
(clears throat)
(beep)
Me again.
Where are you?
I am not okay with you sleeping
at your ex-girlfriend's
then not picking up the phone,
in case you're wondering.
Also, I still cannot believe
you didn't get a flu shot.
Call me back.
(gasps, yells)
(coughs)
What the hell?
The flu?
How is this possible?
Hey, Patrick.
It's cousin Cody again.
Look, they're really pushing me
on this hot air balloon;
I promised you'd deliver.
Call me back.
(sneezes)
Sheesh!
Say it, don't spray it, brother.
Gesundheit!
(blowing nose)
+
I don't know why we can't just
let people be sick at home.
It's called a containment strategy.
You know what I read?
I read that seeing live music
actually helps the body
fight off illnesses.
That's ironic, right?
For the millionth time,
I am sorry about the concert.
This quarantine is no
picnic for me, either.
I still haven't heard from Wade.
He's probably on his way
to see the Black Keys.
I hear there are seats available!
See, BlueBell's not just
a place to pick strawberries.
BlueBell is a whole experience.
Well, you have to say
that; you're the mayor.
Uh... cut!
Sorry, "cut"?
Uh, y-you don't
get to say "cut."
George, I don't think this is
working without AnnaBeth.
Uh, no offense.
CRICKETT: Or it could be
what we're saying.
It feels real expository.
Uh, Crickett, I'm sorry.
Lavon, can I have a minute?
Yeah.
(clears throat)
Look, we're all making do here, okay?
I got half a crew, AnnaBeth's sick.
But this thing's really coming
to life with you and Crickett.
Yeah, I'm-I'm just
not feeling it.
You're not feeling it.
Okay, well, dude, listen,
it is working.
It is working like gangbusters.
Well, not for me.
Hey, I'm-I'm thinking maybe
I should go bring AnnaBeth
some of my mom's chicken soup,
see if I can't
rally her back to health.
Okay, just so I'm clear, uh,
we have a day and a half
to shoot this commercial, and
you want to take AnnaBeth soup.
You're kidding me, right?
This is a joke.
No, it's really good soup.
You're the one that wanted a commercial
that would put Fillmore to shame.
Yeah.
And you want
to throw all that away
to take your girlfriend some soup.
What?
No, no, she's not my girlfriend.
She's a-a constient
who just happens to be ill.
And as mayor...
No, I am a constituent.
And never once
have you brought me soup.
Let's just admit what's going on here.
George, sometimes soup is just soup.
I-I'll see you later.
Yeah, well, you know,
sometimes soup is just...
Just not this time!
Not when it's love soup!
We're taking an early lunch, everyone.
ANNABETH:
Okay.
I've got two bottles of red wine,
a bunch of CDs and
candles for the bedroom,
because light is the enemy of sex.
Okay, so I read all the parts
that you highlighted-- whew!--
and I just have a couple of questions.
How does one even go about
building a sex dungeon?
Are there, uh, specialized contractors
who do that sort of thing?
Let's not get ahead of ourselves.
Okay, here's another question.
So, I don't know, um, when in the night
that I kick off
the-the main event.
Is it when he first walks in the door?
Or after dinner?
Or is it during dinner?
Do I sort of just launch myself at him?
There should be no launching.
Um, you need a plan.
What's he making?
Lasagna.
Fine, here's what you do.
Watch him prepare it.
Keep the mood light and sexy,
and tell him how good
everything smells.
Oh, right, so I'm-I'm
talking about the food,
but I'm talking about him.
Yep. And then,
once he puts it in the oven,
(snaps fingers)
it's go-time.
That way, you have
45, maybe 50 minutes,
and no one's bloated from eating. Ah!
Perfect!
A.B., you are a genius.
I just want this night to be so...
(sneezes)
(shrieks)
Oh, my God.
No-no-no-no-no-no-no-no.
I cannot be getting sick.
Not tonight, not tonight.
I'm sure it's just
a sneeze of anticipation.
Okay, I have to go home,
steam my head.
Tonight is happening.
Just have fun.
It'll all be great.
Mayor Hayes.
Lavon, what are you doing here?
I brought some soup for AnnaBeth.
I heard she's sick.
What?! You're sick?!
No!
I mean, yes, but...
LEMON:
Not another word.
Tonight is too important.
I'm holding my breath now.
(inhales)
What's so important about tonight?
It's, uh, Jupiter's closest pass
to the earth in years.
She's excited.
Okay, so due to the flu, we have
lost all of our baton twirlers,
uh, most of our dancers,
and, uh, the human pyramid
is now down to two,
which makes it more of a human pole.
How am I supposed to make a commercial
about the people of BlueBell
without any people?
(sighs)
I blew it, man.
Promised Lavon that I would have
a commercial that was
better than Fillmore's,
and I... I have nothing.
Not nothing.
You got me
and, uh, Ch-Charlie
over there.
Who?
Oh, no.
Was this a prop pie, too?
I couldn't help myself.
It is too good.
That's it.
That's it, Tom.
You're a genius.
Yeah? I got this idea
for a Web series, too...
Not now.
(sneezes)
(coughs):
Oh, God.
(sighs)
(doorbell rings)
(whimpering softly)
(sighs)
(giggles)
Look at you, right on time.
I didn't want to waste a minute.
Aw.
(muffled sneeze)
(giggles)
You okay?
Oh, yeah.
I'm just excited that you're here.
(both chuckle)
(sighs)
Hello?
Is anyone here?
Rose!
You made it!
And I brought chocolate pretzels.
So, where is everybody?
What do you mean?
There's more people coming, right?
Everyone else is sick
with the stupid flu,
and no one else is coming.
Okay?
It's just you and me.
Happy?
Maybe I should go.
No, no.
You're not going anywhere.
This is the first time
I get the house to myself,
and there will be a party.
(thermometer beeps)
103 degrees.
(groans):
Oh.
Son of a big fat sweaty hog butt!
I'm sorry.
I didn't mean to swear.
I'm not sure that you did.
(sneezes) Bless you.
Stupid Tom!
It's all his fault.
He says we have to kiss
three times a day.
I told him not during flu season.
Well, I think that's sweet.
I'd kiss my boyfriend three times a day
if I knew where the hell he was.
What do you mean?
Wade's right here in town.
I saw him last night in town square.
Are you sure it was Wade?
Unless he has a twin who also
owns a goofy-looking red hoodie.
(coughs)
(groans)
Wade?
Open up, quarantine-breaker!
I know you're in there!
Come on, open the stupid door!
(Wade coughing)
Wade!
Oh, God.
Oh, you're burning up.
(sighs)
Zoe? Zoe?
Did you just break my window?
+
ZOE:
Just take a sip.
You have to drink something.
I'm fine, and I don't.
If only there were an actual
doctor here who knew better.
If I take a sip, will you just
bring the volume down a little bit?
So, Lily Anne made
a pass at you, and you bailed,
you snuck back into town.
I'm not happy about it, but I get it.
I did say the thing
about the volume, right?
What I don't get is how
you were here, like this,
the whole time I was
leaving you those messages.
Yeah. So you'd rather let me think
that you had an affair
than admit to breaking the quarantine?
Have some toast.
Who does that?
I'm talking to you!
It's not just about the quarantine
or that I maybe almost got
the whole town sick.
Not maybe, you did.
It's about this, okay?
The-the tea and the toast
and the wet washcloth.
All of it.
I didn't call you back when I was sick
'cause I didn't want you
trying to take care of me.
Well, what's wrong with that?
What's wrong with it is I don't
want to be taken care of.
What?
By you or anyone else.
When I'm sick, I just want to be
left alone, and I knew
you'd be incapable of that.
I can take care of myself, all right?
I been doing it
since I was ten years old.
Fine.
You want to take care of yourself?
Go for it.
You keep up the good work.
(giggles)
I don't think my kitchen has ever
smelled so heavenly before.
What is that I smell?
Is that parsley and oregano...
Is that Sicilian clementine?
Spot-on!
(laughs)
Well, the Sicilian clementine,
that's-that's all me.
Don't judge, but I picked a cologne
that went with what I was making.
I like a man who plans ahead.
(both laugh)
So, dinner should be ready in about...
45 minutes.
Well, I have a few thoughts about
how we can kill some of that time.
Do you now?
Mm-hmm.
(muffled sneeze)
Bless you.
No, no, no, no, no.
Bless you, silly!
I just wanted to say that I am so...
(coughs)
...excited
(chuckles)
about dinner.
So, um, why don't you just go sit down.
Go make yourself comfortable,
and I'll be right back.
(chuckles)
Lavon, this is delicious.
It tastes just as good as it smells.
Seems like it's doing the trick.
You sound better already.
Oh, no, you shouldn't.
I'm super contagious.
Runs in my family.
It's okay, I got the flu shot.
Oh, uh, still.
I wouldn't want to take any chances.
(chuckles softly)
You should go.
You sure?
O-Okay.
I'll just, uh, leave the
rest of the care package.
Lavon...
all this for me?
Well, yeah.
And, uh, for the town.
Because the town needs
you to do the commercial.
Right. The commercial. Yeah.
You know, whenever I
had to stay home sick,
my mama would give me soup
and, uh, read to me
from Sports Illustrated.
(chuckles)
Well...
Got the "Spring Planting" issue.
I do have some questions
about my heirloom tomatoes. Hmm.
All right.
(giggles)
I'm sorry to have, uh,
kept you waiting.
Oh, Lemon, you are worth waiting for.
You always have the right thing
to say, don't you?
I think I'm about out of words.
(sneezes)
Oh! Hey, easy. You all right?
(laughs) You seem a little dizzy.
Uh, maybe... that is because
you are... near.
Why don't you
go get me a glass of wine,
and I will just sit right here,
and I will wait for your safe return.
Whoa!
Hey, easy!
(sighs):
Huh. Oh.
Hey, easy.
You all right?
Yeah, it's like...
It's like Disneyland in here.
Lemon, your face is burning up.
Also because you're near?
I think you have the flu.
(crying):
I think so, too.
Hey, why are you crying?
Because I ruined our big night.
No, it's not
ruined. It's just...
postponed.
(sneezes)
Oh, God.
(sniffles)
(sighs)
I understand if you want to go.
This isn't much
of a farewell party at all.
Lemon...
I'm not going anywhere.
I got lasagna in the oven.
(laughs)
Okay?
(laughs)
It's gonna be all right.
(groans)
Sheesh.
Don't mind me,
sick guy sleeping here.
Don't worry. I'm not gonna bring
soup to you.
You can crawl over to it.
Yeah, maybe I will.
You know why I left you
all those messages?
Not because
I was worried about crazy Lily Anne,
but because I missed you.
You weren't worried even a little bit?
We are stupid and wrong.
About what?
About us.
This relationship.
We're supposed to be there
for each other all of the time.
That's the point of this whole thing.
If you're having a
concert, I should be there.
I am with the band.
Apology accepted.
And if you're sick,
you should call your girlfriend,
who also happens to be a doctor,
because in her professional opinion,
you are terrible
at taking care of yourself.
How bad could I be?
I'm still alive, ain't I?
There are turtles that live
to be 130 years old.
Doesn't make 'em geniuses.
Just means that they haven't
been run over yet.
Zoe, I told you, I'm...
I know. You can take
care of yourself.
Guess what, dum-dum.
You're doing it wrong.
Now that you have me,
you're supposed to let
me take care of you.
That's how you take care
of yourself. Get it?
(phone ringing)
What kind is it?
Chicken noodle.
Hey, Rose. What's up?
Ugh!
Magnolia is sick as a dog,
and she won't let me leave!
Okay, I'll be right over.
Please hurry.
It's like a Stephen King story
over here.
(sneezes)
"And when choosing a lawn,
remember, deer never
eat ornamental grass ""
I do believe I found
my new daily affirmation.
(both chuckle)
(coughs) Oh.
Uh, can I get you some
more soup? Oh, okay.
Or we could dive right into, uh,
"Guide for Planting Collard Greens""
Huh. It is the
cousin of kale.
Who knew?
You're really something, you know that?
I didn't know
the mayor made house calls.
It's no big deal.
I'm here to serve.
I bet you say that
to all your constituents.
Well, not all of 'em.
No, no, no, no, no, we...
we... we can't do this.
No. Oh, you're right.
We-we... we can't.
Why not?
I'm very sick, so...
you should go.
Thank you for the magazines
and the soup.
But please go.
I hope you feel better.
(door closes)
+
Okay, uh, it's a little bit
of a different direction,
but I... I think
you're gonna like it.
(clears throat)
♪
Sorry. I couldn't help myself.
It's just too good!
MAN: It's strawberry season
in BlueBell.
Don't miss out.
It's yours for the picking.
(bell dings)
(chuckles) All right.
Take that, Fillmore!
(laughs)
Yeah! All right.
You know, I got half a mind
to put you in charge
of all BlueBell tourism from now on.
(chuckles) I-I appreciate that,
Lavon, but you know what?
I think it's probably time
for me to go back to being a lawyer.
Well, the town thanks you, and so do I.
(sighs) (chuckles)
And, uh,
George, for what it's worth, um,
you were right...
about the soup.
Sometimes it's not just soup.
Tell you this much, in
case you were wondering,
there's some real chemistry there.
Camera doesn't lie.
Knock-knock.
Lemon, are you, uh...?
Over here.
Oh, sweetie!
The flu?
(chuckles)
It looks worse than it is.
Uh, not really.
But fortunately, I
have been in the care
of Dr. Walt Blodgett,
D.D.S. all night.
She's got really good insurance.
And a really sweet boyfriend.
(Walt and Lemon chuckle)
Yeah, I just, uh, popped by to,
you know, check in...
It's okay, A.B., I know
you came to apologiz
What?
For getting me sick.
It's okay.
I mean, these things happen.
I mean, we can't go around
through life holding
our breath, can we?
No, we can't.
I can barely do it at all.
That's why I don't go scuba diving.
(laughs)
(Walt and Lemon laugh)
Well, I should get going.
Uh, but if you need anything...
Oh, I think I got everything
I need right here.
But thank you, A.B.
You're the best.
Your fever broke.
You're gonna live.
I had the weirdest hallucinations.
I dreamt that I was friends with Rose.
Hilarious. Remind me to
never save your life again.
Is it hot in here, or is it just me?
Really?
No one else is warm?
(knocking)
I-I... I just
came by to return this
and to thank you for everything.
You're welcome.
And to tell you
that last night was a mistake.
It can't happen again.
I agree 100%.
Just so we're clear, what
part are we talking about?
The part where I brought you soup?
No.
The part where I read the, uh, article
about organic mulch to you?
No.
Okay.
Well, I guess we're
talking about the part
where we almost did this.
♪
WADE:
Welcome back, Doc.
(sighs)
Guess who's got the flu.
What time is it?
I have patients.
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
Easy there, Sparky.
You're not going anywhere.
Whole town's on the mend.
I can't just stay here.
You can, and you will.
Spending the day in bed;
I'm taking care of you.
You're taking care of me?
Yeah. It's how
this works, right?
You take care of me,
I take care of you.
I think I heard that somewhere.
(whispers):
Yeah.
Hey, I, uh...
I brought you some soup.
I'm not hungry.
Got to have a little bit.
Not open to discussion.
Come on.
No, Wade, I can't.
I can feed you
intravenously if I have to.
I watched a YouTube video.
I can get it done.
Fine.
All right.
Do you have crackers?
Of course I do.
All right, now,
I don't have as many as I had.
I got hungry waiting for you
to wake up, so I snacked a bit.
But, uh, you'll get your crackers...
comment on the mayor's physique,
but I didn't...
Yeah, I like him!
And I'm divorced now,
so who's to say he won't like me back?
We were in love once, and Lord help me,
I still think I am.
Forget about about Lavon.
You've got Walt.
Mayor Hayes and I are friends,
but we both belong elsewhere.
Glad to hear it.
I've never had a real
relationship, Wade.
I don't know how to do this.
Me neither.
Sometimes you just got to wing it.
We're gonna drive each
other crazy sometimes.
But you got to remember, that's part of
what brought us together
in the first place.
MAN (deep voice):
Juices.
WOMAN (sexy voice):
Strawberries.
Get your fill in Fillmore.
MAN:
Sweet.
WOMAN:
Strawberries.
Get your fill in Fillmore.
WOMAN: All the strawberries
you could ever desire.
It's strawberry season in Fillmore.
Come and get your fill.
WOMAN:
Strawberries.
Fillmore made a damn commercial?
My pal at WYET snuck me that copy.
Bluebell's been the number one
Alabama destination
for strawberry picking forever.
I know.
Mayor Gainey's trying to
hijack our berry business.
Looks like he might just get it, too.
Ah, yep. Just like
he stole our Mardi Gras.
Mm.
Sneaky bastard.
That he is.
That he is.
This commercial running already?
No, it doesn't air for
another three days.
But, you know, I had a thought. Hmm?
I ever tell you what I did
freshman year at college?
You about to confess something
I don't want to hear about?
I took a filmmaking class.
Why don't we just make
our own commercial?
You-you think
you can do that?
I won awards in that class.
Huh.
Can you have it ready in three days?
I can have it ready in two.
No, you were right, this
is a nice change of pace
from breakfast at Lavon's.
However...
The eggs do taste a little bit
like beer, don't they?
Mm-hmm.
Oh, hey, before I forget,
do you want me
to put your name
on the list for tonight?
Your show?
That's tonight?
Yeah, Mattress Police Live in Daphne.
All the cool kids are gonna be there.
(sighs) You know, it's just,
it's such a crazy week.
Brick's gone, so I'm on call.
Hey, but if you need me there
to do he whole "I'm
with the band thing..""
Trust me, I don't, all right?
I don't need you to be my groupie.
And I don't need you to be mine.
That's kind of what makes us awesome.
To not being a couple
that needs to do everything together.
To not wearing matching shirts
or eating off each other's plates.
(phone vibrating)
(clears throat)
It's the Alabama Department of Health.
I got to go.
Uh, you mind if
I finish your hash browns?
What did I just say?
Well...
AnnaBeth, I need some advice.
Mm-hmm.
It's Walt.
I feel that there's a storm
on the horizon of our relationship.
He just called me and
invited himself over
to make dinner tomorrow
before he goes out of town.
Oh, my God.
I know.
He wants to make me dinner.
I mean, that's code for that
he hates my cooking, right?
I mean, it's over.
I don't think so.
Sweetie, he wants to have sex.
But are you sure?
Isn't that fast?
I mean, we've only been dating
for a little more than eight weeks.
Eigh... eight weeks?
Mm-hmm.
Sweetie, remember when
we were watching the Olympics
and those opening
ceremonies went on forever?
Yes, and we were like,
when are we gonna see some gymnastics?
Exactly. Trust me,
eight weeks is long enough.
Oh, my God.
This is something
that you want to do, right?
What?
Well, hell yes!
Oh, my God.
Whew!
Suddenly I'm nervous.
I feel like I should do some Pilates
or toning or refinish my floors or...
Is that normal?
Some of that, mm-hmm.
(gasps) Why can't it be
tomorrow night already?
(giggles)
Okay, not to put any pressure on you,
but I want to be wild.
This commercial has got to
drive the mayor of Fillmore
to tears of despair.
Well, then, prepare to be wowed.
(grunts)
We open on you, the mayor, Lavon Hayes,
just strolling down the road,
as you happen upon a stranded tourist,
who just wants to pick strawberries.
I'm intrigued.
Her car's broken down.
She's lost.
She's confused.
But you take her by the hand
and lead her right into...
(snapping fingers)
Tom, card.
Sorry, I got caught up in the drama.
Into the town of BlueBell,
which comes alive before your eyes.
A strawberry paradise.
As strawberry vines reach
for miles across the skyline.
Strawberry novelty cars
motor down the street.
Animated strawberries
float through the air.
We'll do that with green screen.
And, oh,
what's that sound?
Is that Taylor Swift?
What is she singing?
That's right.
You guessed it.
"Strawberry Fields Forever."
As the two of you
get into a giant,
strawberry-shaped
hot air balloon,
you begin to float away
as the residents of BlueBell
assemble below you, smiling, happy,
waving and shouting...
BOTH: "BlueBell, it's yours
for the picking!"
Wow.
That sounds amazing.
You can do all this in two days?
Yes, as long as I have
mandatory town participation,
$1.2 million,
Taylor Swift and a crane.
(laughs)
Uh, (clears throat)
I want this, George,
but the best I can do is, uh,
$378, whoever we can convince
from the town to help out
and my step stool from the garage.
Deal.
(laughs)
Ah, remember,
this has to be kick-ass.
You have my word.
Fillmore ass will be kicked.
(cell phone ringtone playing)
Oh, excuse me.
Of course.
Hey, Zoe.
What's going on?
It's the flu.
Department of Health called
doctors all over the state.
See the red dots?
Confirmed outbreaks.
Mobile, Daphne, Fairhope.
It's closing in.
The flu can't hit BlueBell, Zoe.
It'll cripple our commercial.
Yeah.
Oh, and-and the health
of the town.
Yeah.
I was on E.R. rotation
in New York during H1N1;
that was scary stuff.
Okay, how do you want to handle it?
As the acting medical captain
of the S.S. BlueBell,
I've called for reinforcements.
Rose!
What do you need, Captain?
We need an inventory of supplies.
Antivirals, hydration fluids,
pain relievers...
Why the mask?
You sick already?
No, but I have tickets
to the Black Keys
in Gulf Shores tomorrow night
and my mom is finally gonna let me go.
I'm not taking any chances.
By the way, last mask.
Add it to the list.
LEMON: Did you even hear
a word that I said?
Blah, blah, blah, you can't
stay over tomorrow night,
even though you promised
Daddy that you would.
I have very important,
preexisting plans.
I will be unreachable.
Let me guess.
You and Walt gonna play
Chutes and Ladders all night?
You know what? Why don't
I get you a babysitter.
I'll just call Delma.
No.
Lemon, I am 15 years old.
I do not need a babysitter.
Are you sure?
I'm gonna sit at home,
watch TV all night, and then go to bed.
If I need you, I will text you.
Fine.
But don't need me.
(door closes)
Tina? Magnolia.
Party at my house tomorrow night.
Tell everyone.
ROSE:
I don't get it.
If my boyfriend were in a band,
I would just die every night
I couldn't be in the front row.
Well, that's because
you are in high school.
With me and Wade, it's not like that.
I should call him
and check in on him though.
How are the signs coming?
"Screw the flu,
wash your hands."
Great, it's pithy and it rhymes.
We'll put it up in all the
public restrooms, restaurants...
WADE: Hey.
Hey, what's up, Bon Jovi?
Oh, you know, usual rock star stuff:
hookers, drugs.
About to do sound check.
What you up to?
We are all on flu watch.
But I thought I'd call
to say good luck.
Shake that skinny butt, Kinsella.
Sound ain't gonna check itself.
ZOE:
Who was that?
That sounded like...
Lily Anne.
Think you two have met, right?
Lily Anne Lonergan?
Your wack-a-doo
ex-bandmate who used to be
in love with you?
You didn't tell me
you were playing with her.
Oh, I sure did.
I told you
it's a Mattress Police reunion.
It's not my fault you can't remember
who's in the band.
Come on! You know I get
superstitious about sound check.
(sighs) Look, baby, I better go
before Lily Anne's head explodes
into a fine mist of antidepressants
and grapefruit juice.
I'll call you later, all right?
Bye.
Holy cannoli!
Wade's performing with
Lily Anne Lonergan,
and you're not there?
That's trouble.
No!
No, it's fine.
It's not fine.
A girl like that is
capable of anything.
Lily Anne Lonergan
is super hot and super crazy.
It's like every guy's dream combo.
(door opens)
Zoe, I got a solution.
We need to talk.
In private.
What am I looking at?
BlueBell town bylaws, clause 13C:
the infectious disease ordinance.
In a state of emergency, the mayor
and the Board of
Health director--
that's you until
Brick comes back--
have the power to invoke
a medical quarantine.
Meaning?
We close the border
of BlueBell for 48 hours.
Close the border?
This is all because of your commercial.
Well, sure it's for the commercial.
But it's also for the health
and welfare of BlueBell.
It's for you, for me,
it's for all of us.
For 48 hours, no one goes out,
no one comes in.
Not even someone
who might be out of town
with their super-hot-but-kind-
of-crazy ex-girlfriend?
You want to fight the flu?
This is the best weapon we got.
(sighs)
+
(doorbell rings)
Lemon.
What's wrong?
The worst thing imaginable:
my romantic future is on life support.
Did you hear about
this immoral quarantine
being imposed upon our town
by Zoe Hart and Mayor Hayes?
Once again, big government
just reaching into our bedroom.
Yeah, they're trying
to keep the flu away.
I don't care about the flu.
I care about tomorrow night.
And if no one can get into
town, then Walt can't...
What if you postpone?
No, there will be no postponing.
You yourself said that
eight weeks is pushing it.
And Walt's going out of town,
and what if he comes back
no longer interested?
Okay, settle down.
Do you want me to get a bag
for you to breathe into?
We need to stop this quarantine.
Okay, um, mm.
Did you read the fine print here?
No. My eyes were
blurry with rage.
They're required to hold a town meeting
to vote on the quarantine,
to listen to opposing points of view.
It's all very democratic.
Great.
Let's go let the freedom ring.
Historically, quarantine has proven
very effective in
limiting the transmissions
of communicable diseases.
Boring.
Now, come on, now, we are
falling asleep back here.
Okay, look people, um,
think of the quarantine
as a giant shark net,
and the flu is like
a hungry great white,
desperate to eat
the people of BlueBell.
Now, it's out there, people.
But I just bought my tickets
to see the Globetrotters in Daphne.
My Zumba class is out of town.
48 hours
is like 48 weeks.
(crowd clamoring)
Mr. Mayor!
Are we or are we not in America?
Course we're in America, but...
Well, then here
in America, we have rights.
The right to come
and go as we please.
Yeah. Uh, the freedom of...
movement. GEORGE: Mr. Mayor,
if I may interject.
That one is actually not
in the Bill of Rights, and...
Was I talking to you?!
(crowd oohing)
Let's just get back to the point.
Will there be any exceptions
to this quarantine?
What kind of exceptions?
Um, just spitballing,
uh, let's say that
somebody needs an emergency
organ transplant.
ANNABETH: Right!
And the only organ
available is an organ...
out of town.
Yep.
Actually, I-I think
that's a great idea.
It is?
Medically speaking,
I think that it would be
reasonable for someone
to enter town if they can
show proof of a flu vaccine.
I second that motion!
You sure about this?
Captain of the
S.S. BlueBell.
All right, all those
in favor, say "aye."
ALL:
Aye!
You might just have
a future in politics.
Hey, uh, Lavon?
Hey, uh, this commercial, uh...
We really need to cast our girl.
The role of this tourist
is key, and we need
real chemistry, so I was
thinking, I don't know, Wanda,
maybe Babs Foster,
uh, Susie the hairdresser...
It should be AnnaBeth.
Eh, AnnaBeth,
I-I just don't...
I don't see...
What just happened?
You want me to be in
a commercial with you?
I-I don't know.
Well, it's important
to the town that this part be played
by someone with an appealing energy.
A face that the audience
can't help but fall in love with.
Ain't that right, George?
Yes, yes, of course,
but we should discuss it.
Yeah, I'll do it.
I-I mean,
if it's important to the town.
Great. Rehearsal
first thing tomorrow,
town square.
(chuckles):
Okay!
(quietly):
All right!
Okay, yeah, we really need
to work on our collaborative process.
You and AnnaBeth--
am I missing something here?
I just want what's best for the town.
Oh, really? Why don't you look
me in the eyes and say that?
Oh, my goodness!
AnnaBeth, Mayor Hayes
is totally into you.
What? No.
I-I don't think...
"A face you can't help
but fall in love with." Come on!
It doesn't matter.
There is no world in which
I could pursue a relationship
with a man Lemon once loved.
It's basic girl code.
Yes, that's true.
Girl code.
Are you still gonna do the commercial?
Well, it wouldn't be
fair to deny the world
my appealing energy.
ZOE:
Please tell me
that you're kidding.
Well, I could, but I'd be lying.
You never got a flu shot?
I just passed a vaccine
exception to the quarantine
so that you could...
Who doesn't get a flu shot?!
Me, all right? And you know
what else I've never gotten?
The flu.
You do the math, Doc.
Idiot! You do the math.
Now you can't come home for 48 hours.
Please, it's not like
I got to cross a moat.
All right?
Who's gonna know?
Me. I'll know. And it's the law.
You just played a concert
in the middle of Flu-Ville.
Well, I guess I will
have to sleep here, then.
Where exactly is "here"?
(Lily Anne speaking indistinctly)
On... a couch.
Whose couch?
(groans quietly)
It's, uh, Lily Anne's couch.
Look, don't freak out.
Me and Lily Anne,
we're ancient history.
Great. You enjoy that couch.
But don't even think
about all the other things
that you should've
been vaccinated against
before sleeping on it.
Just like old times.
(clears throat) No, not until you, uh,
throw a beer bottle at my head,
it shatters against the wall,
and the neighbors call the police.
(laughs)
Uh...
hey, listen, if it's
any trouble, Ie, an...
get a hotel or...
Since when can you afford a hotel?
Well, by "hotel," I mean
I could sleep in my car.
(laughs)
I'm happy to have the company.
Uh...
(clears throat)
Lily Anne, just...
so everything's on the table, uh,
I'm still with Zoe.
(laughs):
The doctor, right?
The one who said
you couldn't come home tonight?
Yeah, I know.
I just say it because...
Well, just so everything's
on the table,
you should know this couch
is really uncomfortable.
Oh.
(chuckles)
That makes two of us.
+
See, BlueBell's not just
a place to pick strawberries.
No, BlueBell is a whole experience.
You have to say that;
you're the mayor.
Well, don't just take my word for it.
Cue the fire truck!
ALL:
BlueBell!
It's yours for the picking!
Cue the human pyramid!
ALL:
BlueBell!
It's yours for the picking!
Cue the hot air balloon!
Hot air balloon!
Cut on rehearsal!
Cody! Cody, where's
the hot air balloon?
Sorry, George.
My cousin never called me back,
but I can get you
a bouncy house by noon.
A bouncy house?
Mm-hmm.
Is this a joke?
Okay, take ten minutes, everybody,
while I process my disappointment.
Lavon, AnnaBeth...
Chemistry, wow.
You were not lying.
I'd love to see even
more of it, though.
Uh, you're the director.
Whatever you need.
Hey, A.B., you are
falling for this town.
Don't be afraid of physical contact.
You know, grab his arm.
Lavon, touch her back.
We are selling a feeling here.
Mm-hmm.
LAVON:
Yeah.
What the hell?
Charlie, Charlie, hey!
Hey, buddy, uh, these are,
these are not lunch.
These are workin' pies.
Sorry.
Yeah.
Yeah, uh, props!
Props, we need some more pies!
LAVON:
S-So, uh,
you want to practice our lines, or...?
I-I actually have
somewhere to be.
Oh, no, that's fine.
We don't have to...
But maybe we can meet later.
I mean, to practice.
Only if you...
Maybe around dinnertime.
Uh, we can do it at my place.
Maybe around 6:00?
Great!
All right. Okay, uh,
toodle-oo. Okay.
Toodle-oo!
Oh, actually, I got to...
Yeah, I'm this way.
All right.
Wade, it's me.
I haven't heard from you all day.
Give me a call. Bye.
(sneezes)
Cody, I heard that.
Step away from the licorice.
What, Doc?
It's just allergies.
Put your hands where I can see 'em.
All right, come back to the
office with me. Let's go!
(sighs) My seats were fifth row.
You'd have been close enough
to see the Black Keys sweat.
Uh, how many times do we
have to hear about this?
I just wish I had something
to get my mind off my disappointment.
Right. If only someone were
having a party or something.
Fine, I'll send you an evite.
(squeals) Oh, my God!
We're going to a Breeland party!
Just don't invite any
of your loser friends.
Ooh, Red Vines--
my favorite.
So, I think I have tonight covered.
I have my Mozart Is for Lovers CD,
I have the table set,
and I've narrowed it down
to two outfits--
the pantsuit or...
a skort and a cardy.
What do you think?
I-I... Uh, is that
your fine china?
Uh-huh.
Lemon, I say this with love,
but every one of your choices is wrong.
I'm sorry.
Every one?
Tonight is not a dinner party,
it's sex.
That means candles, clothes that
come off quickly, replace Mozart
with Rosanne Cash, and, dear God,
lose the fine china.
But I never get to use it.
Sweetie, if everything
goes the way it ought to,
those dishes will be swept
to the floor with great force.
You think that we might, um...
on the table?
I certainly hope so.
I want you to be prepared.
Any surface is fair game.
I just want tonight to be perfect.
I used to be good at this, I swear.
It used to be like second
nature, and now I don't have
the right lights, the right
music, the right clothes.
Lemon, it's gonna be okay.
I don't even have
the right plates for sex.
I have everything you need.
Why don't you take a short nap,
get your head together,
and then come over to my place.
AnnaBeth.
Hmm?
You are the best,
most loyal friend in the whole world.
I don't know what I'd do without you.
(whispers):
Thank you.
George? It's AnnaBeth.
I have to pull out of the commercial.
I-I think
I'm coming down with the flu.
Please pass on my regrets to Lavon.
CODY:
Are you sure?
This is a hundred percent accurate.
It's the flu.
What happened?
Did you violate quarantine?
No.
I haven't left town in months.
All right,
well, go home and straight to bed.
Don't talk to anyone;
don't breathe on anyone.
Lots of aspirin and fluids.
Yes, ma'am.
(sighs)
(line ringing)
(clears throat)
(beep)
Me again.
Where are you?
I am not okay with you sleeping
at your ex-girlfriend's
then not picking up the phone,
in case you're wondering.
Also, I still cannot believe
you didn't get a flu shot.
Call me back.
(gasps, yells)
(coughs)
What the hell?
The flu?
How is this possible?
Hey, Patrick.
It's cousin Cody again.
Look, they're really pushing me
on this hot air balloon;
I promised you'd deliver.
Call me back.
(sneezes)
Sheesh!
Say it, don't spray it, brother.
Gesundheit!
(blowing nose)
+
I don't know why we can't just
let people be sick at home.
It's called a containment strategy.
You know what I read?
I read that seeing live music
actually helps the body
fight off illnesses.
That's ironic, right?
For the millionth time,
I am sorry about the concert.
This quarantine is no
picnic for me, either.
I still haven't heard from Wade.
He's probably on his way
to see the Black Keys.
I hear there are seats available!
See, BlueBell's not just
a place to pick strawberries.
BlueBell is a whole experience.
Well, you have to say
that; you're the mayor.
Uh... cut!
Sorry, "cut"?
Uh, y-you don't
get to say "cut."
George, I don't think this is
working without AnnaBeth.
Uh, no offense.
CRICKETT: Or it could be
what we're saying.
It feels real expository.
Uh, Crickett, I'm sorry.
Lavon, can I have a minute?
Yeah.
(clears throat)
Look, we're all making do here, okay?
I got half a crew, AnnaBeth's sick.
But this thing's really coming
to life with you and Crickett.
Yeah, I'm-I'm just
not feeling it.
You're not feeling it.
Okay, well, dude, listen,
it is working.
It is working like gangbusters.
Well, not for me.
Hey, I'm-I'm thinking maybe
I should go bring AnnaBeth
some of my mom's chicken soup,
see if I can't
rally her back to health.
Okay, just so I'm clear, uh,
we have a day and a half
to shoot this commercial, and
you want to take AnnaBeth soup.
You're kidding me, right?
This is a joke.
No, it's really good soup.
You're the one that wanted a commercial
that would put Fillmore to shame.
Yeah.
And you want
to throw all that away
to take your girlfriend some soup.
What?
No, no, she's not my girlfriend.
She's a-a constient
who just happens to be ill.
And as mayor...
No, I am a constituent.
And never once
have you brought me soup.
Let's just admit what's going on here.
George, sometimes soup is just soup.
I-I'll see you later.
Yeah, well, you know,
sometimes soup is just...
Just not this time!
Not when it's love soup!
We're taking an early lunch, everyone.
ANNABETH:
Okay.
I've got two bottles of red wine,
a bunch of CDs and
candles for the bedroom,
because light is the enemy of sex.
Okay, so I read all the parts
that you highlighted-- whew!--
and I just have a couple of questions.
How does one even go about
building a sex dungeon?
Are there, uh, specialized contractors
who do that sort of thing?
Let's not get ahead of ourselves.
Okay, here's another question.
So, I don't know, um, when in the night
that I kick off
the-the main event.
Is it when he first walks in the door?
Or after dinner?
Or is it during dinner?
Do I sort of just launch myself at him?
There should be no launching.
Um, you need a plan.
What's he making?
Lasagna.
Fine, here's what you do.
Watch him prepare it.
Keep the mood light and sexy,
and tell him how good
everything smells.
Oh, right, so I'm-I'm
talking about the food,
but I'm talking about him.
Yep. And then,
once he puts it in the oven,
(snaps fingers)
it's go-time.
That way, you have
45, maybe 50 minutes,
and no one's bloated from eating. Ah!
Perfect!
A.B., you are a genius.
I just want this night to be so...
(sneezes)
(shrieks)
Oh, my God.
No-no-no-no-no-no-no-no.
I cannot be getting sick.
Not tonight, not tonight.
I'm sure it's just
a sneeze of anticipation.
Okay, I have to go home,
steam my head.
Tonight is happening.
Just have fun.
It'll all be great.
Mayor Hayes.
Lavon, what are you doing here?
I brought some soup for AnnaBeth.
I heard she's sick.
What?! You're sick?!
No!
I mean, yes, but...
LEMON:
Not another word.
Tonight is too important.
I'm holding my breath now.
(inhales)
What's so important about tonight?
It's, uh, Jupiter's closest pass
to the earth in years.
She's excited.
Okay, so due to the flu, we have
lost all of our baton twirlers,
uh, most of our dancers,
and, uh, the human pyramid
is now down to two,
which makes it more of a human pole.
How am I supposed to make a commercial
about the people of BlueBell
without any people?
(sighs)
I blew it, man.
Promised Lavon that I would have
a commercial that was
better than Fillmore's,
and I... I have nothing.
Not nothing.
You got me
and, uh, Ch-Charlie
over there.
Who?
Oh, no.
Was this a prop pie, too?
I couldn't help myself.
It is too good.
That's it.
That's it, Tom.
You're a genius.
Yeah? I got this idea
for a Web series, too...
Not now.
(sneezes)
(coughs):
Oh, God.
(sighs)
(doorbell rings)
(whimpering softly)
(sighs)
(giggles)
Look at you, right on time.
I didn't want to waste a minute.
Aw.
(muffled sneeze)
(giggles)
You okay?
Oh, yeah.
I'm just excited that you're here.
(both chuckle)
(sighs)
Hello?
Is anyone here?
Rose!
You made it!
And I brought chocolate pretzels.
So, where is everybody?
What do you mean?
There's more people coming, right?
Everyone else is sick
with the stupid flu,
and no one else is coming.
Okay?
It's just you and me.
Happy?
Maybe I should go.
No, no.
You're not going anywhere.
This is the first time
I get the house to myself,
and there will be a party.
(thermometer beeps)
103 degrees.
(groans):
Oh.
Son of a big fat sweaty hog butt!
I'm sorry.
I didn't mean to swear.
I'm not sure that you did.
(sneezes) Bless you.
Stupid Tom!
It's all his fault.
He says we have to kiss
three times a day.
I told him not during flu season.
Well, I think that's sweet.
I'd kiss my boyfriend three times a day
if I knew where the hell he was.
What do you mean?
Wade's right here in town.
I saw him last night in town square.
Are you sure it was Wade?
Unless he has a twin who also
owns a goofy-looking red hoodie.
(coughs)
(groans)
Wade?
Open up, quarantine-breaker!
I know you're in there!
Come on, open the stupid door!
(Wade coughing)
Wade!
Oh, God.
Oh, you're burning up.
(sighs)
Zoe? Zoe?
Did you just break my window?
+
ZOE:
Just take a sip.
You have to drink something.
I'm fine, and I don't.
If only there were an actual
doctor here who knew better.
If I take a sip, will you just
bring the volume down a little bit?
So, Lily Anne made
a pass at you, and you bailed,
you snuck back into town.
I'm not happy about it, but I get it.
I did say the thing
about the volume, right?
What I don't get is how
you were here, like this,
the whole time I was
leaving you those messages.
Yeah. So you'd rather let me think
that you had an affair
than admit to breaking the quarantine?
Have some toast.
Who does that?
I'm talking to you!
It's not just about the quarantine
or that I maybe almost got
the whole town sick.
Not maybe, you did.
It's about this, okay?
The-the tea and the toast
and the wet washcloth.
All of it.
I didn't call you back when I was sick
'cause I didn't want you
trying to take care of me.
Well, what's wrong with that?
What's wrong with it is I don't
want to be taken care of.
What?
By you or anyone else.
When I'm sick, I just want to be
left alone, and I knew
you'd be incapable of that.
I can take care of myself, all right?
I been doing it
since I was ten years old.
Fine.
You want to take care of yourself?
Go for it.
You keep up the good work.
(giggles)
I don't think my kitchen has ever
smelled so heavenly before.
What is that I smell?
Is that parsley and oregano...
Is that Sicilian clementine?
Spot-on!
(laughs)
Well, the Sicilian clementine,
that's-that's all me.
Don't judge, but I picked a cologne
that went with what I was making.
I like a man who plans ahead.
(both laugh)
So, dinner should be ready in about...
45 minutes.
Well, I have a few thoughts about
how we can kill some of that time.
Do you now?
Mm-hmm.
(muffled sneeze)
Bless you.
No, no, no, no, no.
Bless you, silly!
I just wanted to say that I am so...
(coughs)
...excited
(chuckles)
about dinner.
So, um, why don't you just go sit down.
Go make yourself comfortable,
and I'll be right back.
(chuckles)
Lavon, this is delicious.
It tastes just as good as it smells.
Seems like it's doing the trick.
You sound better already.
Oh, no, you shouldn't.
I'm super contagious.
Runs in my family.
It's okay, I got the flu shot.
Oh, uh, still.
I wouldn't want to take any chances.
(chuckles softly)
You should go.
You sure?
O-Okay.
I'll just, uh, leave the
rest of the care package.
Lavon...
all this for me?
Well, yeah.
And, uh, for the town.
Because the town needs
you to do the commercial.
Right. The commercial. Yeah.
You know, whenever I
had to stay home sick,
my mama would give me soup
and, uh, read to me
from Sports Illustrated.
(chuckles)
Well...
Got the "Spring Planting" issue.
I do have some questions
about my heirloom tomatoes. Hmm.
All right.
(giggles)
I'm sorry to have, uh,
kept you waiting.
Oh, Lemon, you are worth waiting for.
You always have the right thing
to say, don't you?
I think I'm about out of words.
(sneezes)
Oh! Hey, easy. You all right?
(laughs) You seem a little dizzy.
Uh, maybe... that is because
you are... near.
Why don't you
go get me a glass of wine,
and I will just sit right here,
and I will wait for your safe return.
Whoa!
Hey, easy!
(sighs):
Huh. Oh.
Hey, easy.
You all right?
Yeah, it's like...
It's like Disneyland in here.
Lemon, your face is burning up.
Also because you're near?
I think you have the flu.
(crying):
I think so, too.
Hey, why are you crying?
Because I ruined our big night.
No, it's not
ruined. It's just...
postponed.
(sneezes)
Oh, God.
(sniffles)
(sighs)
I understand if you want to go.
This isn't much
of a farewell party at all.
Lemon...
I'm not going anywhere.
I got lasagna in the oven.
(laughs)
Okay?
(laughs)
It's gonna be all right.
(groans)
Sheesh.
Don't mind me,
sick guy sleeping here.
Don't worry. I'm not gonna bring
soup to you.
You can crawl over to it.
Yeah, maybe I will.
You know why I left you
all those messages?
Not because
I was worried about crazy Lily Anne,
but because I missed you.
You weren't worried even a little bit?
We are stupid and wrong.
About what?
About us.
This relationship.
We're supposed to be there
for each other all of the time.
That's the point of this whole thing.
If you're having a
concert, I should be there.
I am with the band.
Apology accepted.
And if you're sick,
you should call your girlfriend,
who also happens to be a doctor,
because in her professional opinion,
you are terrible
at taking care of yourself.
How bad could I be?
I'm still alive, ain't I?
There are turtles that live
to be 130 years old.
Doesn't make 'em geniuses.
Just means that they haven't
been run over yet.
Zoe, I told you, I'm...
I know. You can take
care of yourself.
Guess what, dum-dum.
You're doing it wrong.
Now that you have me,
you're supposed to let
me take care of you.
That's how you take care
of yourself. Get it?
(phone ringing)
What kind is it?
Chicken noodle.
Hey, Rose. What's up?
Ugh!
Magnolia is sick as a dog,
and she won't let me leave!
Okay, I'll be right over.
Please hurry.
It's like a Stephen King story
over here.
(sneezes)
"And when choosing a lawn,
remember, deer never
eat ornamental grass ""
I do believe I found
my new daily affirmation.
(both chuckle)
(coughs) Oh.
Uh, can I get you some
more soup? Oh, okay.
Or we could dive right into, uh,
"Guide for Planting Collard Greens""
Huh. It is the
cousin of kale.
Who knew?
You're really something, you know that?
I didn't know
the mayor made house calls.
It's no big deal.
I'm here to serve.
I bet you say that
to all your constituents.
Well, not all of 'em.
No, no, no, no, no, we...
we... we can't do this.
No. Oh, you're right.
We-we... we can't.
Why not?
I'm very sick, so...
you should go.
Thank you for the magazines
and the soup.
But please go.
I hope you feel better.
(door closes)
+
Okay, uh, it's a little bit
of a different direction,
but I... I think
you're gonna like it.
(clears throat)
♪
Sorry. I couldn't help myself.
It's just too good!
MAN: It's strawberry season
in BlueBell.
Don't miss out.
It's yours for the picking.
(bell dings)
(chuckles) All right.
Take that, Fillmore!
(laughs)
Yeah! All right.
You know, I got half a mind
to put you in charge
of all BlueBell tourism from now on.
(chuckles) I-I appreciate that,
Lavon, but you know what?
I think it's probably time
for me to go back to being a lawyer.
Well, the town thanks you, and so do I.
(sighs) (chuckles)
And, uh,
George, for what it's worth, um,
you were right...
about the soup.
Sometimes it's not just soup.
Tell you this much, in
case you were wondering,
there's some real chemistry there.
Camera doesn't lie.
Knock-knock.
Lemon, are you, uh...?
Over here.
Oh, sweetie!
The flu?
(chuckles)
It looks worse than it is.
Uh, not really.
But fortunately, I
have been in the care
of Dr. Walt Blodgett,
D.D.S. all night.
She's got really good insurance.
And a really sweet boyfriend.
(Walt and Lemon chuckle)
Yeah, I just, uh, popped by to,
you know, check in...
It's okay, A.B., I know
you came to apologiz
What?
For getting me sick.
It's okay.
I mean, these things happen.
I mean, we can't go around
through life holding
our breath, can we?
No, we can't.
I can barely do it at all.
That's why I don't go scuba diving.
(laughs)
(Walt and Lemon laugh)
Well, I should get going.
Uh, but if you need anything...
Oh, I think I got everything
I need right here.
But thank you, A.B.
You're the best.
Your fever broke.
You're gonna live.
I had the weirdest hallucinations.
I dreamt that I was friends with Rose.
Hilarious. Remind me to
never save your life again.
Is it hot in here, or is it just me?
Really?
No one else is warm?
(knocking)
I-I... I just
came by to return this
and to thank you for everything.
You're welcome.
And to tell you
that last night was a mistake.
It can't happen again.
I agree 100%.
Just so we're clear, what
part are we talking about?
The part where I brought you soup?
No.
The part where I read the, uh, article
about organic mulch to you?
No.
Okay.
Well, I guess we're
talking about the part
where we almost did this.
♪
WADE:
Welcome back, Doc.
(sighs)
Guess who's got the flu.
What time is it?
I have patients.
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
Easy there, Sparky.
You're not going anywhere.
Whole town's on the mend.
I can't just stay here.
You can, and you will.
Spending the day in bed;
I'm taking care of you.
You're taking care of me?
Yeah. It's how
this works, right?
You take care of me,
I take care of you.
I think I heard that somewhere.
(whispers):
Yeah.
Hey, I, uh...
I brought you some soup.
I'm not hungry.
Got to have a little bit.
Not open to discussion.
Come on.
No, Wade, I can't.
I can feed you
intravenously if I have to.
I watched a YouTube video.
I can get it done.
Fine.
All right.
Do you have crackers?
Of course I do.
All right, now,
I don't have as many as I had.
I got hungry waiting for you
to wake up, so I snacked a bit.
But, uh, you'll get your crackers...