Growing Pains (1985–1992): Season 2, Episode 11 - Choices - full transcript

Go, you mighty Hooters

V, V, victory For
var, var, varsity

Victory for varsity Go, Hooters!

Mike Seaver to
the principal's office.

Mike Seaver, come to the
principal's office immediately, mister.

Well, I mean it's like a scientific fact
that you can be cute or you can be deep.

But only one in a million
can be cute and deep.

Yeah.

It's like last summer I thought I might
try being really deep this year, but...

Okay.

So then, what would you call
someone like Carol Seaver?



Pathetic.

Carol, I need you
to write me a note.

To the principal's office,
in Mom's handwriting.

What did you do this time?

I don't know yet, so why don't you make
it one of those all-purpose deals, okay?

Hey, Tom. How you doing?

Stand still.

Are you nuts? You're my sister, a
book head. You even study during lunch.

Uh, scratch that
last announcement.

Carol Seaver, come to
the principal's office, please.

That's Carol Seaver.

All right.

Sorry, Mike. It was
an honest mistake.

Hey, no sweat.



- Is Mom home yet?
- Nope.

- Dad?
- In with a patient.

But I get to talk to him first.

Yeah, well, I want to
talk to Mom anyway.

Ben, you know you're not
supposed to be pigging out like that.

Yeah, well, it's not
for me. It's for Mike.

Hey, thanks, Benny.

So, Carol, did the principal decide to
name the school after you? "Nerd High"?

Well, as a matter of fact, he called
me in to say that if I wanted to...

I could skip a grade.

Whoopee.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Carol.

If you skip a year...

that means we're both gonna
be in the 11th grade together.

Only for a year, then I'll
move on to 12th grade...

and you could have
11th all to yourself again.

Hey.

Carol, in my grade.
This really sucks eggs.

Hello?

Hey, Mike, it's Jerry.

Look, Jerry, I can't talk now, all
right? I just got the worst news.

No, believe me, nothing you can
say is gonna cheer me up right now.

Oh, yeah? How
incredibly gorgeous is she?

You serious? Oh, whoa.

I don't know, man. I
mean, it's a school night.

She's a stewardess?

Oh, really?

No, no, I'm in on it.

Just let me run it by my dad.
It makes him feel involved.

Mr. Bendle, for our next session,
I'd like you to think about why it is...

you have so much difficulty
just talking to people.

Well, okay, then, I'll
see you next week.

- Hey, Dad.
- Dad.

Mom? Is that Mom?

- Can I go out?
- I was here first.

- I was.
- Mike.

- Ben.
- Boys.

- Mom?
- She's not home.

- Jason, I'm home.
- Okay.

Carol? CAROL: What?

- Mom.
- Mike.

- No, Carol.
- What?

Stop.

- Ben, what?
- I want to play next door.

Fine. Carol?

I want to talk to Mom.

Fine. Mike?

- I want to go out tonight.
- It's a school night.

What happened to "fine"?

So, Carol, what do
you need to talk about?

Well, did the principal
call you today?

Oh, no, what did Mike do now?

Nothing, it's me. I
wanted to tell you first.

I'm sorry, you're just not going
anywhere until I have some details.

Yeah, all right, Dad.
Man to man, the truth.

I've agreed to go out on this blind
date with a shy, young fragile girl...

who's only in
town for one night.

A traveling high-school girl?

Exchange student, yeah.

No.

If it's okay with Mom,
is it okay with you?

Yeah, good luck.

A whole grade? That's my girl.

Carol, this is
absolutely fabulous.

What? What's fabulous?

Carol, your father doesn't know?

Well, not unless the
principal called him.

What did you do now?

Nothing.

Carol's the one who got
sent to the principal's office.

Carol, honey, what's the matter?

"Carol, honey"? I'm sorry.

There's something
very wrong here.

Carol's going to skip a grade.

Well, I have to pass the 10th grade
proficiency test, of course, but...

Well, that's nice.

Jason?

It's very nice.

Honey, he's thrilled.

Mom, listen, just real quick. Dad
says I can go out if it's okay with you.

- Okay.
- Thanks.

- Nice?
- I said very nice.

I don't understand you, Jason.

Skipping an entire grade
is a real achievement.

It can be, but there are
recent studies of adolescent...

I don't wanna hear about
recent studies of adolescents.

I mean, this is
Carol. Our daughter.

She's different.

She has goals, ambitions.

Like her mother.

Exactly.

Something wrong with that?

- You said you didn't wanna hear about it.
- Well, I wasn't ready then. I am now.

Okay.

Well, the question is not whether
she should skip the 10th grade...

but why she wants to. Is it
because you want her to?

Is it because with the
additional workload...

she won't have time for social activities
she's not comfortable with anyway?

And won't she be even more uncomfortable
with kids who are a year more mature?

And what if she fails?

Is she really ready for
that kind of pressure?

Do you have any
idea how frustrating it is

to be married to someone
who's so rational?

Not a clue.

Excuse me...

I'd just like to express my thoughts
on Carol skipping this grade.

You know, as an older
brother who cares for...

No, no, I'll just say it, who
loves his younger sister...

I'd just like to say...

Please don't let
Carol skip this grade.

I don't ask much from
you guys, little allowance...

some shelter from the
rain, a burger now and then.

- Get up, Mike.
- I'm not asking for myself, no.

Personally, I would find having Carol
in the class a delightful experience.

I'm asking on behalf
of the entire 11th grade.

And what's their problem?

Well, basically they feel
that with Carol in the class...

we'll have exceeded
our nerd quota.

Oh, really?

Yeah, Dad, you know how it
is, it's a very delicate balance.

One more nerd, it tips.

Chaos.

Dinner will be ready
in just a minute.

I lost my appetite, Mom. I'm
studying about the Donner Party.

Oh.

Oh, listen, Carol, just
one quick question.

Sure.

This business of skipping a grade,
you would be doing it for yourself, right?

- Of course.
- Okay.

And it isn't to avoid a year's
worth of social activity...

and keep your nose buried in books instead
of interacting with other kids, is it?

No.

Great.

And you've thought about
the additional pressures, right?

What pressure?

What pressure?

That's my girl.

I'm just curious.

Does this seem
wrong to anyone else?

Mike, help your
brother with the dishes.

Sure, Dad.

Ben, the dishwasher's that way.

So if we're finished talking
about this, I have to go study.

- I'm finished. Jason?
- Go ahead, Carol.

See what I mean? She's
thought this completely through.

I don't know why I let you
get me so worried about it.

I can't help wondering...

If I had that extra year, things
would be a lot different for me.

I would have graduated in '68, had
Ben in '74, gone back to work in '84.

Why, I'd be a year younger.

No, wait.

Carol, if you skip a grade,
won't you miss your friends?

Well, it's not like I'm gonna
be changing schools, Dad.

I think she should
skip the grade.

It's a chance to mess
up Mike's whole year.

My life is good.

Well, I do admire your determination,
and you remind me of your mom.

Yeah, but I won't make the same mistake
she made with the marriage and family bit.

- Did she just say...?
- Yes, she did.

Marriage and
family are a mistake?

- Where would she get such an idea?
- Honey, don't blame yourself.

Me?

Me? You're suggesting
that I gave her that idea?

No, no. No, no.

I mean, I love being married
to you. I love my family.

I mean, there's times I think
about it when I almost gush.

I know that. I've seen you gush.

Then where would
she get such an idea?

Well, probably from
some adult she admires.

Who?

I would guess
somebody close to her.

- A woman.
- Yes.

Oh, I see. So now we're
back to accusing me.

Maybe she's misread your
decision to go back to work.

Maybe you do put a little too
much emphasis on excelling.

Just like potty-training.

- What?
- Do it for Mommy.

Do it for Mommy.

Do it for Mommy.

Excuse me, I have
to go to the bathroom.

Carol, why don't you and I
go out for an ice cream cone...

and we'll discuss
skipping that grade, okay?

- Ice cream's fattening.
- You have nothing to worry about.

I wasn't thinking about me.

You were saved by the bell.

I got it, I got it, I got it.

I got it. I got it.

I'm gonna get it.

Hi, I'm Kitty from
Bravo Airlines.

You must be Mike.

Hey, did I luck out this time or what?
I usually don't go out on blind dates...

but I just broke up with my
boyfriend 12 and a half days ago...

his name was Rico and
with no warning whatsoever...

he dumps me, talk
about immature.

How do you do? I'm Jason
Seaver, I'm Mike's dad.

Mike?

Hi there.

I'm sorry, Mike can't
go out with you tonight.

Oh, why? Is he sick?

No, he's young.

Mike, why don't you take Kitty out on the
porch and maybe you can explain further.

- No, no, Dad, I don't think...
- Jason, what's going on?

Maggie, this is Kitty.

This is the woman you gave Mike
permission to go out with tonight.

I didn't. You did.

Uh, Kitty, we must talk.

Well, the usual punishment or
are you feeling creative tonight?

I can't think about it now,
Jason. I have to talk to Carol.

- Yes. Okay, okay.
- Okay.

Carol, got a minute?

- I just got to pass that proficiency test.
- That's what I wanted to...

If I do, I'll finish high school a year
earlier, finish college a year earlier...

start a business
a year earlier...

become TIME magazine's
Woman of the Year a year earlier.

Well, before you hit retirement,
I'd like to have a word with you.

- What's wrong?
- I'm not sure.

I might be overreacting and
I probably heard you wrong...

but I thought you
said some silly thing...

about marriage and
family being a mistake.

Right.

- Right?
- Yes.

- Where did you get an idea like that?
- From you.

Oh, honey, you know that
I don't feel that way at all.

I mean, I love being married to
your dad, I love raising you kids.

Ask anyone we know.
Give me a phone, I'll dial.

Mom, why are you
getting so excited?

Why? Because I get the feeling we haven't
been talking about skipping a grade.

We've been talking
about you skipping life.

I remember you
told me to work hard.

- Think about college and a career.
- Sure I did.

So, what's the point of doing that just
to get married and give it up like you did?

I haven't given up anything.

Mom, you worked for
Newsweek and quit to raise kids.

Yes, but now I've
gone back to work.

For a local newspaper.

The Long Island Herald
is number one in Syosset...

and number two in Massapequa.

Exactly.

Oh, Carol. Look, honey, I
know this is a little complicated.

I mean, sure I'm sorry
that I missed the big time...

but I'm not sorry at all
about getting married...

or having three great kids.

Do you understand?

Yes.

- Are you sure?
- Of course.

You think you have to say this
because you regret what you had to do.

Oh, no, no, I don't.

Of course you do.

And don't worry about it because I
am gonna make you so proud of me...

that you are gonna go crazy.

I'm already there.

So you see, Kitty, I used
to be much older than this.

Oh, dear.

It's an extremely rare disease.

That is really amazing.

Oh, and tragic too.

I would think so.

You know, as far as I know, there's
only two reported cases in the world.

Me and Dick Clark.

But you don't show your pain.

No.

No, I don't.

Do you have any idea what it's like
going through puberty backwards?

I can imagine.

If they ever find a cure
for this, give me a call.

You can count on it.

I have seen the future...

and it is good.

Jason, do me a favor. Shoot me.

It'd be quick and clean.

We can do it on the front lawn,
turn on the sprinklers, no mess at all.

So it went well?

Oh, honey, this is all my
fault and do you know why?

Of course you know
why. You know everything.

- Well, it's my...
- She thinks I'm some kind of a saint.

Who gave up everything
for you and the kids.

Does she know that's
the choice you made?

Yes. And she didn't believe me.

I wish she had been
around before she was born.

Yeah.

You know, that might work.

Don't humor me when
I don't make any sense.

Oh, honey, if you have any
ideas, I'd love to hear them.

I didn't think so.

Dad, what are you
still doing awake?

Well, I just have something here
I think you might be interested in.

Not another song by Gary
Puckett and the Union Gap.

No, why do you say that?

Because every time
you get out the old tape

recorder, it's to play
a terrible old song.

Well, Gary Puckett happens to be an
artist, and that's not what this is about.

I still have a lot of
studying to do, Dad.

Well, just listen when
you have a chance.

Listen, it's a blast
from the past, 1971.

It is Gary Puckett.

You're in the way, Mr. Seaver.
JASON: I'm a doctor.

- So am I, you're still in the way.
- Come on, honey, one more push.

Sure, where else
am I going to go?

Come on, one,
two, three, and push.

Here it comes.

I see him, a little
more, Maggie.

Wow, just look at him.

Her, her. It's a girl.

It's a girl. We have a daughter.

- Hello, Alexis.
- Not Alexis.

But we agreed.

That's when I thought
it would be a boy.

Nurse. JASON: Well...

Oh, isn't she beautiful, Jason?
I don't care what we call her.

This is the happiest
day of my life.

She looks like you.

Where is she going
to go to college?

Before we decide on college,
shouldn't we give her a name?

Maybe Carol won't go to
college. JASON: Carol?

I've always liked
that name. Do you?

Well... MAGGIE: I don't
care what she wants to do.

Just as long as she's as
happy as I am right now.

- Carol it is, then.
- Oh, Jason, I love you.

Does that sound like a woman
who regretted her choice?

I always thought...

Oh, boy, oh, boy, oh,
boy were you wrong.

So you did what
you wanted to do.

I still am.

So you're saying I
should have a family?

No.

So you're saying I
should have a career?

No.

Mom, I'm really
getting confused here.

Good, because that means...

you're beginning to realize
that you have options.

Well, as long as we're set up, how
about some classic Gary Puckett?

Hot? Was she hot?

Well, let's just say that
on a scale of one to 10...

she was a 747.

So my mom says:

"Take that lewd blouse
back, young lady."

Boy, your mother's great
compared to my mother.

I swear, I have like no choices.

It's like she's sick of her life,
so she wants to lead mine.

My mother's not like that.

Are you talking to us?

Yeah. My mother lets
me make my own choices.

She wants me to
make my own choices.

She expects me to
make my own choices.

Isn't that incredible?

Too much studying.

- No, no. See, it's all up to me.
- Uh-huh.

Do I really want to spend
every lunch hour studying?

Do I really want
all the pressure?

Do I really want
to skip this grade?

No.

No.

No, I do not want
to skip this grade.

All right, this is my day.

Mike Seaver.

Mike Seaver, I want you
in my office in five minutes...

and this time
there is no mistake.

Mom, Mom, Carol just played that
tape you made when she was born.

Again?

Yeah, I didn't even know tape
recorders were invented in the olden days.

Yes, we came up
with that right after fire.

Well, when do I get to hear the
tape you made when I was born?

Your tape?

Umm... Well, you
see, Ben, old buddy...

when first you have children, you
want to capture every moment and then...

I think we probably packed
yours in a different box.

- I'll get it in the morning.
- All right.

Jason, we didn't make a
tape when Ben was born.

- Well, not yet we haven't.
- Wait a minute.

Now, you remember how it
goes. One, two, three, push.