Frasier (1993–2004): Season 8, Episode 23 - A Day in May - full transcript

[doorbell rings]

[door opening]

HEY, DAPHNE.

HELLO, ROZ, ALICE.

WHAT BRINGS YOU HERE?

WE'RE BORROWING FRASIER'S CAR.

OH, I SEE, AND YOU'RE LEAVING
ALICE HERE AS COLLATERAL.

[Roz chuckles]

ACTUALLY, HE'S BEING
VERY NICE ABOUT IT.

MINE'S IN THE SHOP,
AND I'M TAKING ALICE

AND A FEW OF HER FRIENDS
TO AN ICE CREAM PARTY.



YOU TOLD ME IT WAS YOUR
FRIENDS AND THE SCIENCE CENTER.

HE SAID, SHE SAID,

WE'LL NEVER KNOW
WHAT REALLY HAPPENED.

FRASIER, DON'T BE SO UPTIGHT.

I'M NOT GONNA HURT
YOUR PRECIOUS CAR.

I AM NOT UPTIGHT,
IT'S JUST THAT I'VE HAD

SOME UNFORTUNATE EXPERIENCES
BEFORE, LOANING OUT MY CAR.

I LEFT AN UMBRELLA IN THE TRUNK.

IT WAS A WET UMBRELLA!

CAN I HAVE THE KEYS?

YES, YES.

[keys jingling]

AFTER ALL, WHAT ARE
FINE POSSESSIONS FOR,

IF NOT TO BE USED AND ENJOYED?



AND WHO BETTER
TO ENJOY THEM THAN

THE DELIGHTFUL SOULS
OF SMALL CHILDREN?

I'LL PUT A TARP
IN THE BACK SEAT.

OH, BLESS YOU.

HEY, ROZ. HELLO, ALICE. HEY.

WHAT BRINGS YOU HERE?

OH, FRASIER LOANED ME HIS CAR.

I BACKED MINE INTO
A TELEPHONE POLE.

YOU SAID YOU WERE
GETTING A TUNE-UP.

IT NEEDS ONE, TRUST ME.

IS, UH, DAPHNE READY?

UH, ACTUALLY I THINK
SHE'S IN HER ROOM.

YOU TWO HAVE PLANS?

YES. I AM TAKING HER TO
THE BOTANICAL GARDENS.

CAN YOU BELIEVE SHE'S
NEVER BEEN BEFORE?

DIDN'T DONNY TAKE HER TO THE
BOTANICAL GARDENS LAST YEAR?

CAN YOU BELIEVE SHE'S
NEVER BEEN BEFORE?

(Niles) HEY, DAPHNE!

HELLO, NILES.

YOU READY TO GO TO THE GARDENS?

YEAH, I'M AFRAID I'M GONNA HAVE
TO TAKE EDDIE FOR A WALK FIRST.

WHERE'S DAD? I DON'T KNOW.

HE'S BEEN GONE ALL MORNING.

OH, HERE, I'LL TAKE
HIM FOR A QUICK WALK.

OH, NO. HE'S GONNA
NEED MORE THAN THAT.

HE'LL GO STIR-CRAZY.

HE'S GOING TO NEED A
FULL RUN AT THE DOG PARK.

WE DON'T HAVE TIME
TO GO TO THE DOG PARK.

UH, THE... THE TOUR OF SUCCULENTS
STARTS PROMPTLY AT 12:00.

UH, HEY, FRASIER,
CAN YOU TAKE HIM?

NO, I'M SORRY, NILES.
ROZ HAS MY CAR, YOU SEE,

AND LANA'S COMING
BY TO PICK ME UP

FOR A TUTORING
SESSION WITH KIRBY.

OH, I'LL JUST GET EDDIE'S TOYS.

HELLO, THIS IS
DR. FRASIER CRANE.

I NEED TO MAKE AN EMERGENCY
APPOINTMENT TOMORROW

FOR A COMPLETE
CLEANING OF MY B.M.W.

JUNE 10TH?

BUT...

I HAVE A... A CLEAN
TEAM PRIVILEGES CARD.

YES, OF COURSE
IT'S A PLATINUM ONE.

NO. NO, THERE ARE NO
DIAMONDS ON THE CORNER.

WELL, THEN, YES, I'D LIKE
TO BECOME A MEMBER

OF THE DIAMOND
ALLIANCE IMMEDIATELY.

FINE.

PUT ME ON THE WAITING LIST.

I'LL SEE YOU IN JUNE!

YOU'RE NOT IN THE
DIAMOND ALLIANCE?

DON'T DO THAT.

SO THIS IS IT? MMM-HMM.

HARDLY CALL THIS A DOG PARK.

[dogs barking] IT'S
MORE LIKE A DOG ORGY.

WHOSE BEAGLES ARE THOSE?

DON'T STARE. IT ONLY
ENCOURAGES THEM.

ALL RIGHT, HURRY UP, EDDIE. THERE'S
LOTS OF EXCITING DEPRAVITY TO EXPLORE.

HE WANTS TO PLAY A LITTLE FETCH.

OH. WELL, HERE, YOU THROW IT.

WITH MY BARE HANDS?

OH, COME ON, IT'S FUN.

ALL RIGHT. READY? HERE WE GO.

AND, FETCH!

ALL RIGHT, I DIDN'T GIVE YOU
ENOUGH OF A CHALLENGE.

RIGHT, RIGHT, YOU READY? READY?

AND, HO! GO GET IT.

[chuckling]

I'M SORRY. I... I WAS
A BIT OF A GROUCH.

THIS IS ACTUALLY A FINE
WAY TO SPEND THE DAY.

YEAH. IN FACT,

IT'S KIND OF, UH...

HELLO.

DO YOU SUPPOSE THE
REST OF EDDIE'S IN THERE?

GOOD BOY, GOOD BOY. HEY.

SORRY ABOUT THAT, DAPHNE,

BUT WHAT WITH THE ORGANIC VITAMIN
PASTE I'VE BEEN FEEDING TANK HERE,

EDDIE CAN'T KEEP UP
WITH HIM ANYMORE.

[barks]

IT'S NO PROBLEM, JIM.

UH, NILES, THIS IS
JIM BRADY AND TANK.

THIS IS NILES, MY BOYFRIEND.

IT'S A PLEASURE.

BOYFRIEND. WELL, I
SHOULD'VE KNOWN.

IT SEEMS LIKE EVERY TIME I'M
SINGLE, YOU'RE IN A RELATIONSHIP,

AND EVERY TIME YOU'RE
SINGLE, I'M IN A RELATIONSHIP.

YEAH, THAT'S TRUE.

I GUESS WE JUST DON'T HAVE...

TIMING. VERY GOOD... EXACTLY.

[laughing] YEAH.

AND I'M A DRUMMER.

WHICH MAKES IT EVEN MORE IRONIC.

UM...

(Jim) TANK, THAT'S RUDE.

NOW, CHILL.

WOW. WOW.

YOU'VE REALLY GOT HIM TRAINED.

THAT'S THE PROBLEM WITH EDDIE.

HE ONLY LISTENS IF HE THINKS
HE'S GOING TO GET FOOD.

YEAH. OR... OR ONE OF MY SOCKS.

[chuckling]

BUT MOSTLY FOOD.

WELL, IT'S ALL IN THE
VOICE TONE, REALLY.

ANY DOG CAN LEARN
TO RESPOND TO IT

EVEN AN OLD WHEEZER LIKE EDDIE.

YOU, UH, YOU WANT ME
TO SHOW YOU? I'D LOVE IT.

COME ON. COME ON, BUDDY.

YEAH, WE'D ALL LOVE IT. UH...

[cell phone ringing]

OH, UH, YOU GUYS, UH, GO AHEAD.

YES.

HELLO.

HI, NILES, IT'S ME.

I JUST WANTED TO MAKE SURE
DAPHNE TOOK EDDIE FOR A WALK.

I COMPLETELY FORGOT
ABOUT HIM THIS MORNING.

YEAH, YEAH, WE'RE
IN THE DOG PARK NOW.

UH, WHERE ARE YOU ANYWAY?

I'M AT THE TRACK.

UH, HAD AN ITCH FOR
IT WHEN I WOKE UP

AND SO I JUST DROPPED
EVERYTHING AND WENT.

UH, I'M AT THE WINDOW, UH...

I'LL HAVE A TRIFECTA IN THE 8TH.

UH, GOTTA RUN.

W-WH...

[door opening]

WELL, I DIDN'T REALIZE THAT I WAS GONNA
BE SELLING HOUSES WITH YOU TODAY.

WHY DIDN'T YOU JUST DROP ME
OFF AND THEN COME ON YOUR OWN?

STOP WHINING. IT WILL
ONLY TAKE A MINUTE.

I HOPE WE DON'T RUN INTO THE
SAD SACK WHO OWNS THIS PLACE.

I'VE BEEN TRYING TO SELL
THIS HOUSE FOR OVER A YEAR

AND HE KEEPS DRIVING
AWAY EVERY POTENTIAL BUYER.

HOW DOES HE DO THAT?

OH, HI.

I HEARD A WOMAN'S VOICE. I THOUGHT
IT MIGHT BE MY WIFE COMING BACK TO ME.

NO. SHE LIVES IN PORTLAND NOW

WITH HER NEW HUSBAND,
LAMAR, REMEMBER?

OH, EXCUSE ME. FRASIER CRANE,

PHILLIP DONOVAN,
THE CURRENT OWNER.

HELLO. HI.

WELL, SEE YOU LATER, PHILLIP.

ANYWAY, MY WIFE JUST
LEFT WITH THE KIDS.

NO TALKING, NO EXPLANATIONS.

JUST RIPPED MY HEART
OUT, THREW IT TO THE DOGS.

WHICH SHE ALSO TOOK.

WELL, UH, AT LEAST YOU ARE GETTING
OUT AT THE TOP OF THE MARKET.

ACTUALLY, THIS IS A
VERY GOOD TIME, PHILLIP,

AND I THINK TODAY IS THE DAY.

OH, NO! OH, GOD!

WHAT'S WRONG?

THE DAMN BASEMENT
MUST HAVE FLOODED AGAIN.

EVERYTHING IN
THIS BOX IS RUINED.

LITTLE SUSIE'S CAP SHE WORE
HOME FROM THE HOSPITAL, RUINED.

DANNY'S FIRST SOCCER
UNIFORM, RUINED!

WELL, YOU KNOW, I HAVE
AN EXCELLENT DRY CLEANER.

NO! OH, UH. SHH!

ONCE, ACTUALLY, I SPILLED BUTTER

ON A PAIR OF WHITE
VELVET PANTALOONS,

AND, UH...

WELL, IT'S A... IT'S
A LONG STORY,

BUT, UH, HE HAD IT
OUT IN UNDER A MINUTE.

FRASIER, JUST GIVE
HIM THE ADDRESS.

YES, YES. I HAVE 2
SONS AND 2 DAUGHTERS.

THE PERFECT AMERICAN FAMILY. AW.

UNTIL THAT BASTARD, LAMAR,
SHOWED UP TO SNAKE OUR DRAINS.

NOW ALL I HAVE LEFT
ARE WEEKEND VISITS

AND, WELL, A FEW TREASURES
FROM THEIR CHILDHOOD,

LIKE THIS HOUSE, LITTLE
DANNY AND I MADE AT DAY CAMP.

OH, THANK GOODNESS, IT
MADE IT THROUGH UNSCATHED.

JUST A LITTLE WATER
DAMAGE IN THE BASEMENT.

JUST LIKE THIS HOUSE.

OH, WELL.

YES, WELL, UH... UH, PHILLIP,
YOU ARE STILL THEIR FATHER.

I MEAN, I KNOW THINGS
SEEM DIFFICULT RIGHT NOW,

BUT BELIEVE ME,
IT'LL GET EASIER.

WELL, IT'S ALREADY EASIER.

I MEAN, LOOK AT ME, I'M DRESSED.

PHILLIP, YOU KNOW WHAT
WOULD REALLY CHEER YOU UP?

IS TO MAKE A KILLING
ON THIS HOUSE.

NOW, DON'T YOU THINK YOU
SHOULD GET BACK TO WORK?

YEAH, I GUESS.

THAT AIR TRAFFIC ISN'T
GONNA CONTROL ITSELF.

(Lana) OK, HERE WE GO.

NO, NO, NOT THE FRONT DOOR!
LET'S GO OUT THE SIDE DOOR.

OK. GOOD, GOOD TO
SEE YOU AGAIN, PHILLIP.

I'LL CALL YOU REAL
SOON. THANKS. BYE.

GOOD LORD, THAT MAN
IS OBVIOUSLY IN PAIN.

THE LEAST YOU COULD BE
IS A LITTLE SYMPATHETIC.

I HAVE BEEN SYMPATHETIC
FOR 15 MONTHS!

I HAD HIM OVER FOR THANKSGIVING!

HE GOT DRUNK THE FIRST HALF HOUR

AND CRIED HIMSELF TO
SLEEP IN MY COAT CLOSET.

AND I CONSIDER THAT
ONE OF OUR GOOD DAYS.

WELL...

SO WHERE ARE THESE
SO-CALLED BUYERS OF YOURS?

YOU TOLD ME THEY'D BE
HERE IN A FEW MINUTES.

WELL, THEY'RE OBVIOUSLY
RUNNING LATE, OK.

IT'LL GIVE US A TIME
TO GO OVER THE PLAN.

WHAT... WHAT, THERE'S A PLAN?

WELL, SURE.

WHEN THE SMOLENSKIS GET HERE,
YOU ACT LIKE YOU WANT THE HOUSE.

YOU KNOW, A LITTLE COMPETITION.

PUT A LITTLE
PRESSURE ON THE DEAL.

YOU'RE ASKING ME
TO BE YOUR SHILL?

THAT'S THE WORD. YES, YES!

NOW, LISTEN. LISTEN, LISTEN,

YOU DON'T HAVE TO SAY ANYTHING.

I'M SORRY, NO!

WELL, WHY NOT?

WELL, LOOK, OK, ALL YOU
HAVE TO DO IS WALK AROUND

WITH AN INTERESTED LOOK
ON YOUR FACE, YOU KNOW.

THEY'LL FILL IN THE REST.
I WILL DO NO SUCH THING.

WHY WON'T YOU HELP ME?

BECAUSE I REFUSE TO LIE FOR YOU.

OH, FINE! THEN GO
WAIT IN THE CAR!

I NEVER WANTED TO LEAVE THE CAR!

OH, JUST GET OUT!

[gasping]

[exclaiming]

ALL RIGHT, I'VE GOT SOME
CREAMSICLES AND FUDGSICLES

AND SOMETHING THEY
CALL, UH, "BOMB POPS".

WELL, I CALLED THE SMOLENSKIS.

I BOUGHT US A LITTLE EXTRA TIME.

RIGHT, GOOD. GOOD, ALL RIGHT.

LET'S SPREAD OUT SOME PAPER
AND THEN BUILD US A HOUSE.

SO, FRASIER,

WITH ALL YOUR TALK
ABOUT HONESTY,

HOW DO YOU JUSTIFY
FAKING THIS THING?

WELL, WE'RE SIMPLY PROTECTING
THE FEELINGS OF A-AN INNOCENT MAN.

NOTHING DISHONEST ABOUT THAT.

UH-HUH.

SO, UH, ARE YOU GONNA WRITE
"I LOVE YOU, DADDY", OR AM I?

I'LL DO IT.

SIT.

WAVE. WAVE.

OH.

ALL RIGHT, HIDE YOUR
EYES. HIDE YOUR EYES.

(Jim) HIDE 'EM. HIDE
'EM. HIDE YOUR EYES.

HIDE YOUR EYES. OH, HELLO.

COME ON. HIDE YOUR
EYES, HIDE YOUR EYES.

HEY, EDDIE, DON'T WORRY
ABOUT THAT OTHER DOG.

HE MAY BE BIGGER AND
FLASHIER, AND BETTER LOOKING,

BUT YOU HAVE SUBSTANCE.
SHE KNOWS THAT.

HOW AMAZING IS JIM?

HE'S SO CONNECTED TO ANIMALS,

IT'S ALMOST MAGICAL.

DAPHNE, I'VE BEEN
MUSING ABOUT YOU AND ME,

AND I HAVE A THOUGHT.

YEAH?

IN EVERY HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP I THINK
THERE SHOULD BE ROOM FOR AN OCCASIONAL,

VERY OCCASIONAL,
IRRATIONAL DEMAND.

WHAT DO YOU MEAN?

UH, A THING WE INSIST
THE OTHER DO OR NOT DO,

AND THE OTHER ONE HAS TO DO IT

OR NOT DO IT WITHOUT QUESTION.

IS THAT FAIR?

IT IS.

BECAUSE WE EACH
GET ONE, AND ONLY ONE,

FOR OUR WHOLE RELATIONSHIP.

WELL, IF IT'S
IMPORTANT TO YOU...

THEN IT'S AGREED?

AGREED.

GOOD.

OH, I'VE GOT MINE.

ALREADY? YES.

UH, I WANT YOU TO PROMISE NEVER
TO COME TO THIS DOG PARK AGAIN.

WHAT?

I KNOW IT SOUNDS EXTREME,

IT'S EVEN UNREASONABLE,

BUT THAT'S THE BEAUTY OF
THE IRRATIONAL DEMANDS.

IS THIS ABOUT JIM?

THE, UH, THE DEMAND
CANNOT BE SCRUTINIZED.

IT'S, UH, BY
DEFINITION, IRRATIONAL.

ARE YOU SURE THIS IS HOW YOU
WANT TO USE YOUR ONLY ONE?

[panting]

ABSOLUTELY.

I'VE THOUGHT THIS THROUGH A LOT.

IRRATIONALLY, OF COURSE.

OK, IF YOU'RE SURE.

I PROMISE NEVER TO COME
TO THIS DOG PARK AGAIN.

THANK YOU.

I KNEW YOU'D UNDERSTAND.

[Jim laughing]

ALL RIGHT, WE'RE GOING HOME.

TANK NEEDS TO REHYDRATE

AND, OH, I'M LATE FOR
A DELTOID WORKOUT.

WELL, I GUESS THIS
IS GOODBYE, JIM.

YEP, BY THIS TIME NEXT WEEK,

I'LL BE LEADING MY
FIRST RAFT TOUR IN CHILE.

REALLY? YEAH.

WOW. WHEN DO YOU GET BACK?

OH, HE'S NOT COMING
BACK. HE'S MOVING THERE.

GOOD LUCK, JIM. YES.
YOU, TOO, DAPHNE.

TAKE CARE. AND, UH,
STAY COOL, BUDDY.

OH, YOU KNOW IT.

[sighing]

I WONDER HOW I'LL USE
MY IRRATIONAL DEMAND.

OH, WHAT'S MY RUSH?

I'VE GOT YEARS TO THINK IT OVER.

HI, MARTIN.

OH, HELLO, JOANNE.

HOW HAVE YOU BEEN?

OH, PRETTY GOOD.

OH, PLEASE, HAVE A SEAT.

THANKS.

I WAS WORRIED I
WAS GOING TO BE LATE

WITH ALL THAT
CONSTRUCTION GOING ON.

YEAH, I KNOW, IT'S A MESS.

HOW'S YOUR HIP?

OH, YOU LEARN TO LIVE WITH IT.

I THINK ABOUT YOU
A LOT, YOU KNOW.

I'VE WANTED TO CALL, BUT...

I DON'T KNOW.

I UNDERSTAND. IT'S OK.

SO, ANOTHER YEAR HAS GONE BY.

WELL, TIME REALLY FLIES.

I GUESS IT GOES A
LITTLE SLOWER FOR ME.

HOW'S OUR ROOF COMING?

ALMOST DONE. GOOD.

YOU KNOW, THERE WAS A
TIME, BACK IN HIGH SCHOOL,

WHEN I WOULD HAVE PAID $1,000

TO WATCH YOU EAT A POPSICLE.

IT WAS A LONG TIME AGO.

[both chuckling]

I THINK IT'S KIND OF FUNNY
THAT WE BECAME FRIENDS.

WE'RE FRIENDS?

WELL, SURE WE ARE.

WHY WOULDN'T YOU THINK SO?

OOP, OH, DEAR.

NICE GOING, DIPSTICK.

YEAH.

IT'S A BRAND-NEW SHIRT.

MMM.

[car approaching]
OH, I HEAR A CAR.

MMM. IT'S THE SMOLENSKIS.

OK, KEEP WORKING. RIGHT.

I GOTTA GO UP TO PHILLIP'S ROOM

AND SPRAY SOME AIR
FRESHENER AROUND.

HIS ROOM REEKS OF, I
DON'T KNOW, DESPAIR.

HA.

[door opening]

OH.

IT'S EVEN NICER THAN I REMEMBER.

WELL, HELLO THERE.

ARE YOU HAVING FUN
MAKING YOUR LITTLE HOUSE?

WELL, HI! OH, THERE YOU ARE! HI.

OH, I SEE YOU'VE MET FRASIER.

YOU KNOW, I'M SO
GLAD YOU CAME TODAY,

BECAUSE THE INTEREST ON
THIS PLACE IS REALLY HEATING UP.

WELL, WE'RE CERTAINLY
INTERESTED AS WELL,

BUT WE... WE'VE HEARD THAT
A LOT OF HOMES IN THIS AREA

HAVE A FLOODING PROBLEM.

NOW, WHAT DO YOU KNOW
ABOUT THE BASEMENT HERE?

(Lana) HONESTLY? YES.

THIS HOUSE IS 60-YEARS-OLD AND I
HAVE ONLY HEARD OF IT FLOODING ONCE.

OH!

[clearing throat]

AND I CAN TELL YOU FOR A FACT

THAT THE CURRENT OWNER STORES

SOME OF THIS MOST CHERISHED
KEEPSAKES IN THAT BASEMENT.

[Frasier coughing] OH.

ARE YOU CHOKING ON YOUR LOLLY?

NO. I AM CHOKING ON SOMETHING

FAR MORE DANGEROUS
AND DESTRUCTIVE

THAN A SIMPLE SUGARY TREAT.

IT'S A PROLIFIC AND
POWERFUL POISON

KNOWN AS DECEPTION.

HE'S VERY VERBAL.

AH, YOU KNOW,

[chuckles] I JUST REMEMBERED.

GOSH, YOU KNOW, THE
OWNER DID MENTION SOMETHING

ABOUT A RECENT LITTLE
MOISTURE PROBLEM DOWNSTAIRS.

TELL YOU WHAT, WHY
DON'T I GIVE A CALL

AND SEE IF HE'LL COME DOWN
JUST A TINY BIT IN THE PRICE?

OH, THAT'D BE WONDERFUL.

IF YOU COULD GIVE US
A BREAK IN THE PRICE,

I'M SURE WE'LL MAKE
AN OFFER. OH, GREAT.

I'LL CALL YOU TONIGHT.

(Mrs. Smolenski) OH,
THANK YOU, LANA. SURE.

GOODBYE, SONNY.

(Lana) I'LL CALL YOU TONIGHT.

BYE-BYE.

THERE NOW, YOU SEE?

YOU DID THE RIGHT THING.

THAT WASN'T SO BAD, WAS IT?

I GUESS NOT.

OOH, LOOK AT OUR LITTLE
HOUSE! IT LOOKS GREAT.

ALL RIGHT.

SAY, YOU KNOW, WE'VE GOT A
FEW EXTRA POPSICLE STICKS LEFT,

WHY DON'T WE ADD ON HALF A BATH?

[laughing]

FRASIER.

HMM, YOU KNOW, LANA,

I THINK THE HOUSE SHOULD
GO THE OTHER WAY AROUND.

WITH THE... WITH THE
DOOR FACING THE COUCH.

FENG SHUI.

[scoffs]

FINE, FINE, FINE, FINE, FINE.

[grunting]

[grunting]

AH, PERFECT. PERFECT.

NOW, YOU SEE, DOESN'T IT
FEEL GOOD TO TELL THE TRUTH?

IT'S LIKE BREATHING A BREATH
OF FRESH AIR AFTER A LONG...

YEAH, YEAH, YEAH. LET'S GET
OUT OF HERE. YEAH, ALL RIGHT.

[elevator bell dings]

OK, ALICE.

BEFORE WE SEE UNCLE FRASIER,

LET'S REMEMBER TOGETHER
WHAT REALLY HAPPENED.

NOW, DID YOU THROW UP
IN UNCLE FRASIER'S CAR?

NO, YOU DIDN'T.

THAT SMELL WAS THERE
BEFORE, WASN'T IT?

THAT'S MY GIRL.

THERE YOU GO.

UH, BESIDES THE
LIBRARY ASSIGNMENT,

I'VE BEEN TAKING THE COMPUTER
CLASS ON WEDNESDAYS.

I HOPE TO GET A JOB
WITH COMPUTERS.

UH, YOU KNOW, WHEN I GET OUT.

CAN YOU TELL US WHAT
CONSIDERATION, IF ANY,

YOU'VE GIVEN THIS CRIME.

WELL, I REGRET IT EVERY DAY.

I... I WAS YOUNG AT THE
TIME AND I WASN'T THINKING,

YOU KNOW, ABOUT
THE CONSEQUENCES.

I'M VERY SORRY.

THE VICTIM IS HERE.

MR. CRANE, WOULD YOU
LIKE TO MAKE A STATEMENT?

I HAVE NOTHING TO SAY.

(woman) WOULD YOU
GIVE US A MOMENT?

[sighing]

MR. HICKS, THE BOARD COMMENDS
YOU FOR YOUR PARTICIPATION

IN THE IN-HOUSE PROGRAMS
TO BETTER YOURSELF,

AND FOR YOUR RECORD
OF EXCELLENT CONDUCT.

WE HAVE WEIGHED THIS AGAINST YOUR
CONVICTION OF SHOOTING A POLICE OFFICER

DURING THE COMMISSION
OF A ROBBERY,

AND FIND THAT THE LENGTH
OF YOUR TIME SERVED

HAS NOT YET MET THE STANDARDS
FOR PROPORTIONALITY, EQUALITY,

AND JUSTICE AS
REQUIRED BY STATE LAW.

PAROLE IS DENIED.

[banging on door]

[buzzer sounding]

(Frasier) ♪ HEY, BABY, I
HEAR THE BLUES A-CALLIN' ♪

♪ TOSSED SALADS
AND SCRAMBLED EGGS ♪

MERCY.

♪ AND MAYBE I SEEM
A BIT CONFUSED ♪

♪ WELL, MAYBE, BUT
I GOT YOU PEGGED ♪

[laughing]

♪ BUT I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO ♪

♪ WITH THOSE TOSSED
SALADS AND SCRAMBLED EGGS ♪

♪ THEY'RE CALLIN' AGAIN ♪

GOOD NIGHT, EVERYBODY!