Frasier (1993–2004): Season 2, Episode 9 - Adventures in Paradise: Part 2 - full transcript
In the conclusion of a special two-part episode, Frasier and his ideal woman, Madeline Marshall, share a secluded South Sea island retreat next door to his ex-wife, Lilith, and her new love interest, Brian (James Morrison). Frasier wakes up the next day, he walks over, and sees the back of a woman, which turns around, revealing that it's Diane Chambers (Shelley Long). At home, Roz fields one of Frasier's calls from Steve, who's having a problem with women.
FRASIER: I just
opened up the pages
of Seattle magazine
and there she was.
Oh, my.
Who is this fresh angel?
Madeline Marshall?
Why don't I just
come out and say it?
Would you be so good as to
have dinner with me tonight?
I was wondering what you thought
about us going away
for the weekend?
Roz, I'm in love.
So off I flew to Bora Bora
and did I receive
the shock of my life.
( in sexy voice): Frasier...
Oh, my God.
Frasier?
Oh, my God!
Lilith, what are you doing here?
I suppose I could ask
you the same thing.
MADELINE: Frasier,
is everything all right?
Yes, yes. Why don't you
come out and join us, Madeline.
What about you?
Are you here with someone?
Yes, actually.
He's snorkeling at the moment.
Anyone I know?
Sam Malone.
Sam?!
Just kidding.
Of all places, Lilith, why
did you bring him here?
Well, it was spectacular five
years ago when you brought me.
It's even more breathtaking now.
But this was our place.
How could you
bring someone else?
Oh, Madeline.
Here.
Lilith, I'd like you to
meet Madeline Marshall.
How's this for a hoot?
This is my ex-wife Lilith.
Your ex-wife is here?
Yes, yes.
What a shame, too...
No papers to be signed.
So you're here
with someone?
Why does everyone keep
asking me that? Yes, I am.
Oh, here he comes now.
Brian?
Dr. Brian Patchett.
I'd like you to meet
Madeline Marshall...
Hello.
And Dr. Frasier Crane.
Your ex-husband?
You're making a joke.
No, God is.
Pleasure to meet you.
Likewise.
Uh, Brian is a
seismologist at M.I.T.
Oh, well, that's perfect...
Brian being a seismologist
and you having so many faults.
Lilith...
you're laughing.
Oh, I laugh quite a bit
these days thanks to Brian.
Madeline is just hilarious.
She also designs
her own line of sportswear.
I'm sorry, I don't think
I've ever worn sportswear.
So, how long are
you going to stay?
Until Tuesday.
We're here till Wednesday.
Well, this certainly
has the potential
to be very awkward.
Why don't we
diffuse the situation
by getting together
for cocktails later?
Better yet, let's have dinner.
That's a wonderful idea.
Why don't we meet in
the Tiki Room at 6:00?
Great.
Looking forward to it.
A wonderful way to start out
what promises to be
the greatest week of our lives.
You see how Mr. Perfect kept
rubbing it in just to get my goat?
Frasier, relax.
Oh, he had to climb that
tree to get her a coconut!
There were three of
them on the ground!
Would you stop obsessing?
Come here.
Okay.
( moaning)
Hold it. What's that?
What's what?
Lilith is making love in there.
I don't hear a thing.
Exactly!
Would you just
concentrate on me, please?
Oh, you're right.
You're right. It's not
like it was back in college
when that sort of thing was
going on in the next room
and I was left all alone
with nothing but my dreams
and my Henry Miller collection.
You're right, I just got
to block it out of my mind,
just try to focus and
concentrate on the task at hand.
Oh, that's sexy.
You're right.
Forgive me.
You want sexy?
I'll show you sexy.
( moaning)
I feel dirty.
Good.
No, no, I mean sandy
from sitting on the beach.
Just let me take a shower.
Okay. Don't be long.
( chuckles)
When I come back,
I'll make you forget you
were ever married to Lilith.
That's never happened
before without a prescription.
( shower running)
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
( speaking louder): Oh, yeah.
Ohh!
It's never been
like this before!
Never!
Nothing.
Damn her! She can
give as good as she gets!
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah!
Ohh!
Oh, mama!
Oh!
Oh, God! You are so hot!
I am burning up!
Oh, that's it!
That's it!
Yes! Yes!
Oh, my God, yes!
Keep it up, baby!
Oh, you're killing me!
Oh, God, you're an animal!
Yes! Yes!
( loud banging)
Well...
obviously you don't need me.
Well, before we go to our
Eye In The Sky Chopper Dave,
for a traffic report,
I would like to send
this confidential
message to Madeline M.
Madeline, I'm sure
your gentleman
would love an opportunity
to explain his behavior,
but you left the island before
he had a chance and, um...
you won't return his calls
or answer the notes he's sent.
We all know how hard it
is to find love in this world,
and what a tragedy it is to
let it slip through our fingers.
I think he really
cares about you.
( tapping on glass)
This is Dr. Frasier Crane.
We'll be back in a moment.
Frasier, you were wonderful.
You really think she'll call?
If the woman doesn't respond,
she doesn't have a heart.
Thank you, Roz.
Oh, I almost forgot.
This bill came for you
from your hotel in Bora Bora.
Well, that's...
that's not too bad.
I guess they had to charge
me for the whole week.
No, that's for the
bed you trashed.
$2,500 for bamboo?!
Hello. This is
Dr. Frasier Crane.
Roz, whom do we have next?
We have Vic from
Seattle on line three.
Hello, Vic.
I'm listening.
Hi, Dr. Crane. Thanks
for taking my call.
I'm a first-time caller;
I'm little nervous.
Oh, just relax, Vic.
I'm listening.
Yeah, I'm really having
a problem with women.
Frasier, Madeline's on line one.
Dr. Crane?
Oh, uh, uh, Vic, uh, uh,
some-something's
come up in the booth.
You know, I'll have
to turn you over
to my... my very
capable producer.
Okay.
Madeline, Madeline, hi.
Oh, thanks for calling.
Oh, no, no, it's okay.
It's okay. I'm off
the air right now.
So, Vic, what's this trouble
you're having with women?
I don't know, you
know, I have a good job,
I think I have a
good personality.
'Course I made more
money when I was a modeling,
but I'm doing okay
at the law firm.
Tell me more.
Maris will be thrilled
you're coming to see
her tonight in the ballet.
DAPHNE: Oh, we're delighted.
( mumbling): Yeah.
You know, when I was younger,
I dreamed of being
a ballerina myself.
So did Maris!
But the poor thing could
never get her weight up enough.
That's why I couldn't help
myself at the ballet fund-raiser
when they auctioned
off this walk-on part.
It was the perfect
gift for my Maris.
So, Maris is going
to be a ballerina?
No. It's non-dancing,
but it is a key role, Dad.
She plays Ulrich, the
hunchbacked drawbridge operator.
I hope we can pick her out.
What are you people
still doing here?
Oh, hush. We'll be long gone
before your lady
friend gets here.
But you don't want
to be late for the ballet.
I do. When those ballet guys
start flying around
in those tight pants,
I don't know where to look.
Oh, that reminds me.
I've got to bring me binoculars.
Will you get out of here?
Frasier, will you relax?
I can't. This is my last
chance with Madeline.
Serves me right, too, after
the way I behaved in Bora Bora.
You're being too hard on
yourself. It was just bad luck.
How were you to know
that Lilith had arrived
on the island?
Aside from the
seas starting to churn
and all the birds taking
flight from the trees.
Oh, now, don't you
worry, Dr. Crane.
Miss Marshall's
going to forgive you.
Women always appreciate a man
who's sensitive
enough to try again.
That's why they
call us the fair sex.
All right, then,
let's go see some
leaping Russian stags.
Oh, hi, Maddie.
Madeline.
DAPHNE: Oh, hello.
We were just
leaving for the ballet.
Madeline, come in.
You two kids take your time.
Don't worry about us.
We'll be out all evening.
Ah, you know how it is.
First the ballet, then
the inevitable discussion.
Well... that was a
little awkward, huh?
So is this.
I guess there's no delaying it.
I might as well just
launch into my little speech,
try to explain why I
behaved the way I did.
You know what might be better?
If I tell you how I've
got it worked out.
The minute you saw
Lilith, you wanted to leave,
but I wouldn't let you.
You said you couldn't handle it
and-and by God, you were right.
You panicked,
and your panic
took a bad turn...
A spectacularly bad turn.
Anyway, that's how I've
got it worked out in my head,
and it's fragile, so
let's not mess with it.
So, why don't you
mix up a pitcher of Mai
Tais and give me a kiss?
I'll let you guess
which I want first.
Guess again.
Mmm... delicious.
I love mangoes.
Well, we never got around to
sampling this tropical delicacy
while we were on the islands,
so I thought we
should do it now.
Good thinking.
( chuckles)
You know, there's...
something else we never
got around to in Bora Bora.
Well, you got around
to it. I just watched.
Well, how about a little
audience participation this time?
Frasier, wait.
( clears throat)
I want this as much as you do,
but there's something I
need to talk to you about first.
What?
Well, I wasn't
gonna say anything.
I... I thought I was
comfortable with this,
and I wouldn't have
to bring it up, but...
Well, I was involved with a
divorced man once before,
and just about the time that
I was really falling for him,
he reconciled with his ex-wife,
and I'm telling you, I just
can't go through that again.
It's all right, Madeline.
Trust me. I assure you that
Lilith and I are completely finished.
She lives clear on the
other side of the country.
Except in matters of our son,
we don't even have contact.
That's all I wanted to hear.
( moaning)
Well, what's your
name, little fella?
You promise you won't laugh?
The dog.
His name is Eddie.
Come on.
Pardon me while I put
him back where he belongs.
I'll be waiting.
( knock at door)
( knocking)
Oh, God!
It's nice to see you, too.
Is Frasier here?
Don't you live in Boston?
I'm here on a layover,
and judging by Frasier's
trademark mangoes-on-a-stick,
so are you.
If you like, I can come
back in ten minutes.
That won't be necessary.
I apologize for coming at
an inopportune moment,
but Frasier and I
have an agreement
that we'll make
time for each other
if either one of
us has something
urgent to discuss... which I do.
Take all the time you need.
This whole thing's just a
little too complicated for me.
Put down that mango, my dear.
It's time you tasted
the forbidden fruit.
Yaaahh!
Lilith! What are
you doing here?!
I have something
urgent to discuss.
What have you
done with Madeline?
She was surprised
to see me and she left.
I hope you're not angry with me.
Angry?
What do I have
to be angry about?
Just because every
time I carve out
the tiniest slice of
happiness for myself,
you come along
and obliterate it?
My God, woman, I'd drive
a stake through your heart,
but I don't think
anything could kill you!
Brian asked me to marry him.
What?
He wants to stop in Las
Vegas on our way home.
You're getting married?
Yes.
Well...
so am I.
Really?
Yes, yes, to Madeline.
Well, I just saw Madeline.
She seemed in an awful hurry
for someone who's
getting married.
She had to buy a dress.
Oh, God, what am I doing?
I'm not getting married.
Wow, you really had me going.
Frasier, I don't want
to disrupt anything.
Really, I just came here,
hoping to get your blessing.
I could have given you
my blessing over the phone.
Must you be so churlish?
Oh, I think I'm entitled!
The one comfort
in being divorced
is that you're both losers.
Eventually the time comes when
one person is the
first to move on.
Quite frankly, I'd
hoped it would be me.
Well, I'd hoped it
would be me, and it was.
But I'd like to think
that had things worked
out the other way around,
I would have been happy for you.
Well, if you love him,
I am happy for you.
I do.
Brian has been a dutiful
suitor for some time,
and I'm convinced, to within
an acceptable margin of error,
that he loves me.
Does Frederick like him?
Oh, he's crazy about him.
Oh.
Oh, Frasier
Brian could never take
your place that way.
You're Frederick's father.
Congratulations.
Well, it looks
like they made up.
Aaahh!
Hello, everyone.
Lilith, what a
pleasant surprise!
How was Bora Bora?
Never seen you
looking quite so tan.
My God, what does
she look like in winter?
Everyone, we have
some very happy news.
Lilith is going to
be married again.
To who?
Someone else.
Oh, that's great!
Congratulations!
Wonderful!
Oh. Yes.
Just wonderful.
When's the happy occasion?
Tomorrow in Las Vegas.
Oh, Lilith, how
delightfully kitschy.
It's your second marriage,
so you've decided to
poke fun at the institution
by getting married in the tackiest
place you could possibly choose.
Brian's family
lives in Las Vegas.
Well, isn't that convenient?
You'll have someone to
show you the museums.
It was lovely
seeing you all again.
I'll just walk you out.
( sighs)
Well, I hope you haven't
found all this too unsettling.
No, no.
You know, I think
it's actually good
that you're getting remarried.
Knowing us, we could have
spent the rest of our lives
wondering whether our
divorce was a mistake...
If we should have
tried to work it out.
Was it me? Was it you?
Was it us? Was it you?
Now we can move on.
What's next for you?
I suppose I'll try to smooth
things over with Madeline.
Try very hard, Frasier.
She seems worth it.
Well, she'll need convincing.
You know, I guess
I could ask her back
to Bora Bora with me, try again.
You know, I'll lay on the
whole package this time.
I'll buy the
airplane tickets first
and pay for the hotel,
get a limo, champagne,
a little caviar... The
whole nine yards.
Any luck, I'll sweep her
off her feet and into my bed.
I do own it, you know.
( elevator bell rings)
Would you like
to kiss the bride?
It'd be my pleasure.
You're really happy for me?
Well, yes, of course.
You'll understand, though,
if I don't jump up and
down and yell "yippee!"
Yes, I've already seen that.
( sighs contentedly)
( waves crashing, birds
singing, insects chirping)
MADELINE: Now, why don't we
pick up where we left off, Frasier?
Oh, my God.
WOMAN: Frasier?
Oh, my God!
Oh, God!
Oh.
Oh, my...
Oh, God, I just had the...
most frightening dream.
Thank God I'm here with you.
Frasier, we have all week
to analyze your dream.
Right now there's a
huge bug in the shower.
( jazz plays)
♪ Hey, baby, I hear
the blues are callin' ♪
♪ Tossed salads
and scrambled eggs ♪
Quite stylish.
♪ And maybe I
seem a bit confused ♪
♪ Well, maybe, but
I got you pegged ♪
Ha-ha-ha-ha!
♪ But I don't know what to do ♪
♪ With those tossed
salads and scrambled eggs ♪
♪ They're callin' again. ♪
Frasier has left the building.
opened up the pages
of Seattle magazine
and there she was.
Oh, my.
Who is this fresh angel?
Madeline Marshall?
Why don't I just
come out and say it?
Would you be so good as to
have dinner with me tonight?
I was wondering what you thought
about us going away
for the weekend?
Roz, I'm in love.
So off I flew to Bora Bora
and did I receive
the shock of my life.
( in sexy voice): Frasier...
Oh, my God.
Frasier?
Oh, my God!
Lilith, what are you doing here?
I suppose I could ask
you the same thing.
MADELINE: Frasier,
is everything all right?
Yes, yes. Why don't you
come out and join us, Madeline.
What about you?
Are you here with someone?
Yes, actually.
He's snorkeling at the moment.
Anyone I know?
Sam Malone.
Sam?!
Just kidding.
Of all places, Lilith, why
did you bring him here?
Well, it was spectacular five
years ago when you brought me.
It's even more breathtaking now.
But this was our place.
How could you
bring someone else?
Oh, Madeline.
Here.
Lilith, I'd like you to
meet Madeline Marshall.
How's this for a hoot?
This is my ex-wife Lilith.
Your ex-wife is here?
Yes, yes.
What a shame, too...
No papers to be signed.
So you're here
with someone?
Why does everyone keep
asking me that? Yes, I am.
Oh, here he comes now.
Brian?
Dr. Brian Patchett.
I'd like you to meet
Madeline Marshall...
Hello.
And Dr. Frasier Crane.
Your ex-husband?
You're making a joke.
No, God is.
Pleasure to meet you.
Likewise.
Uh, Brian is a
seismologist at M.I.T.
Oh, well, that's perfect...
Brian being a seismologist
and you having so many faults.
Lilith...
you're laughing.
Oh, I laugh quite a bit
these days thanks to Brian.
Madeline is just hilarious.
She also designs
her own line of sportswear.
I'm sorry, I don't think
I've ever worn sportswear.
So, how long are
you going to stay?
Until Tuesday.
We're here till Wednesday.
Well, this certainly
has the potential
to be very awkward.
Why don't we
diffuse the situation
by getting together
for cocktails later?
Better yet, let's have dinner.
That's a wonderful idea.
Why don't we meet in
the Tiki Room at 6:00?
Great.
Looking forward to it.
A wonderful way to start out
what promises to be
the greatest week of our lives.
You see how Mr. Perfect kept
rubbing it in just to get my goat?
Frasier, relax.
Oh, he had to climb that
tree to get her a coconut!
There were three of
them on the ground!
Would you stop obsessing?
Come here.
Okay.
( moaning)
Hold it. What's that?
What's what?
Lilith is making love in there.
I don't hear a thing.
Exactly!
Would you just
concentrate on me, please?
Oh, you're right.
You're right. It's not
like it was back in college
when that sort of thing was
going on in the next room
and I was left all alone
with nothing but my dreams
and my Henry Miller collection.
You're right, I just got
to block it out of my mind,
just try to focus and
concentrate on the task at hand.
Oh, that's sexy.
You're right.
Forgive me.
You want sexy?
I'll show you sexy.
( moaning)
I feel dirty.
Good.
No, no, I mean sandy
from sitting on the beach.
Just let me take a shower.
Okay. Don't be long.
( chuckles)
When I come back,
I'll make you forget you
were ever married to Lilith.
That's never happened
before without a prescription.
( shower running)
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
( speaking louder): Oh, yeah.
Ohh!
It's never been
like this before!
Never!
Nothing.
Damn her! She can
give as good as she gets!
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah!
Ohh!
Oh, mama!
Oh!
Oh, God! You are so hot!
I am burning up!
Oh, that's it!
That's it!
Yes! Yes!
Oh, my God, yes!
Keep it up, baby!
Oh, you're killing me!
Oh, God, you're an animal!
Yes! Yes!
( loud banging)
Well...
obviously you don't need me.
Well, before we go to our
Eye In The Sky Chopper Dave,
for a traffic report,
I would like to send
this confidential
message to Madeline M.
Madeline, I'm sure
your gentleman
would love an opportunity
to explain his behavior,
but you left the island before
he had a chance and, um...
you won't return his calls
or answer the notes he's sent.
We all know how hard it
is to find love in this world,
and what a tragedy it is to
let it slip through our fingers.
I think he really
cares about you.
( tapping on glass)
This is Dr. Frasier Crane.
We'll be back in a moment.
Frasier, you were wonderful.
You really think she'll call?
If the woman doesn't respond,
she doesn't have a heart.
Thank you, Roz.
Oh, I almost forgot.
This bill came for you
from your hotel in Bora Bora.
Well, that's...
that's not too bad.
I guess they had to charge
me for the whole week.
No, that's for the
bed you trashed.
$2,500 for bamboo?!
Hello. This is
Dr. Frasier Crane.
Roz, whom do we have next?
We have Vic from
Seattle on line three.
Hello, Vic.
I'm listening.
Hi, Dr. Crane. Thanks
for taking my call.
I'm a first-time caller;
I'm little nervous.
Oh, just relax, Vic.
I'm listening.
Yeah, I'm really having
a problem with women.
Frasier, Madeline's on line one.
Dr. Crane?
Oh, uh, uh, Vic, uh, uh,
some-something's
come up in the booth.
You know, I'll have
to turn you over
to my... my very
capable producer.
Okay.
Madeline, Madeline, hi.
Oh, thanks for calling.
Oh, no, no, it's okay.
It's okay. I'm off
the air right now.
So, Vic, what's this trouble
you're having with women?
I don't know, you
know, I have a good job,
I think I have a
good personality.
'Course I made more
money when I was a modeling,
but I'm doing okay
at the law firm.
Tell me more.
Maris will be thrilled
you're coming to see
her tonight in the ballet.
DAPHNE: Oh, we're delighted.
( mumbling): Yeah.
You know, when I was younger,
I dreamed of being
a ballerina myself.
So did Maris!
But the poor thing could
never get her weight up enough.
That's why I couldn't help
myself at the ballet fund-raiser
when they auctioned
off this walk-on part.
It was the perfect
gift for my Maris.
So, Maris is going
to be a ballerina?
No. It's non-dancing,
but it is a key role, Dad.
She plays Ulrich, the
hunchbacked drawbridge operator.
I hope we can pick her out.
What are you people
still doing here?
Oh, hush. We'll be long gone
before your lady
friend gets here.
But you don't want
to be late for the ballet.
I do. When those ballet guys
start flying around
in those tight pants,
I don't know where to look.
Oh, that reminds me.
I've got to bring me binoculars.
Will you get out of here?
Frasier, will you relax?
I can't. This is my last
chance with Madeline.
Serves me right, too, after
the way I behaved in Bora Bora.
You're being too hard on
yourself. It was just bad luck.
How were you to know
that Lilith had arrived
on the island?
Aside from the
seas starting to churn
and all the birds taking
flight from the trees.
Oh, now, don't you
worry, Dr. Crane.
Miss Marshall's
going to forgive you.
Women always appreciate a man
who's sensitive
enough to try again.
That's why they
call us the fair sex.
All right, then,
let's go see some
leaping Russian stags.
Oh, hi, Maddie.
Madeline.
DAPHNE: Oh, hello.
We were just
leaving for the ballet.
Madeline, come in.
You two kids take your time.
Don't worry about us.
We'll be out all evening.
Ah, you know how it is.
First the ballet, then
the inevitable discussion.
Well... that was a
little awkward, huh?
So is this.
I guess there's no delaying it.
I might as well just
launch into my little speech,
try to explain why I
behaved the way I did.
You know what might be better?
If I tell you how I've
got it worked out.
The minute you saw
Lilith, you wanted to leave,
but I wouldn't let you.
You said you couldn't handle it
and-and by God, you were right.
You panicked,
and your panic
took a bad turn...
A spectacularly bad turn.
Anyway, that's how I've
got it worked out in my head,
and it's fragile, so
let's not mess with it.
So, why don't you
mix up a pitcher of Mai
Tais and give me a kiss?
I'll let you guess
which I want first.
Guess again.
Mmm... delicious.
I love mangoes.
Well, we never got around to
sampling this tropical delicacy
while we were on the islands,
so I thought we
should do it now.
Good thinking.
( chuckles)
You know, there's...
something else we never
got around to in Bora Bora.
Well, you got around
to it. I just watched.
Well, how about a little
audience participation this time?
Frasier, wait.
( clears throat)
I want this as much as you do,
but there's something I
need to talk to you about first.
What?
Well, I wasn't
gonna say anything.
I... I thought I was
comfortable with this,
and I wouldn't have
to bring it up, but...
Well, I was involved with a
divorced man once before,
and just about the time that
I was really falling for him,
he reconciled with his ex-wife,
and I'm telling you, I just
can't go through that again.
It's all right, Madeline.
Trust me. I assure you that
Lilith and I are completely finished.
She lives clear on the
other side of the country.
Except in matters of our son,
we don't even have contact.
That's all I wanted to hear.
( moaning)
Well, what's your
name, little fella?
You promise you won't laugh?
The dog.
His name is Eddie.
Come on.
Pardon me while I put
him back where he belongs.
I'll be waiting.
( knock at door)
( knocking)
Oh, God!
It's nice to see you, too.
Is Frasier here?
Don't you live in Boston?
I'm here on a layover,
and judging by Frasier's
trademark mangoes-on-a-stick,
so are you.
If you like, I can come
back in ten minutes.
That won't be necessary.
I apologize for coming at
an inopportune moment,
but Frasier and I
have an agreement
that we'll make
time for each other
if either one of
us has something
urgent to discuss... which I do.
Take all the time you need.
This whole thing's just a
little too complicated for me.
Put down that mango, my dear.
It's time you tasted
the forbidden fruit.
Yaaahh!
Lilith! What are
you doing here?!
I have something
urgent to discuss.
What have you
done with Madeline?
She was surprised
to see me and she left.
I hope you're not angry with me.
Angry?
What do I have
to be angry about?
Just because every
time I carve out
the tiniest slice of
happiness for myself,
you come along
and obliterate it?
My God, woman, I'd drive
a stake through your heart,
but I don't think
anything could kill you!
Brian asked me to marry him.
What?
He wants to stop in Las
Vegas on our way home.
You're getting married?
Yes.
Well...
so am I.
Really?
Yes, yes, to Madeline.
Well, I just saw Madeline.
She seemed in an awful hurry
for someone who's
getting married.
She had to buy a dress.
Oh, God, what am I doing?
I'm not getting married.
Wow, you really had me going.
Frasier, I don't want
to disrupt anything.
Really, I just came here,
hoping to get your blessing.
I could have given you
my blessing over the phone.
Must you be so churlish?
Oh, I think I'm entitled!
The one comfort
in being divorced
is that you're both losers.
Eventually the time comes when
one person is the
first to move on.
Quite frankly, I'd
hoped it would be me.
Well, I'd hoped it
would be me, and it was.
But I'd like to think
that had things worked
out the other way around,
I would have been happy for you.
Well, if you love him,
I am happy for you.
I do.
Brian has been a dutiful
suitor for some time,
and I'm convinced, to within
an acceptable margin of error,
that he loves me.
Does Frederick like him?
Oh, he's crazy about him.
Oh.
Oh, Frasier
Brian could never take
your place that way.
You're Frederick's father.
Congratulations.
Well, it looks
like they made up.
Aaahh!
Hello, everyone.
Lilith, what a
pleasant surprise!
How was Bora Bora?
Never seen you
looking quite so tan.
My God, what does
she look like in winter?
Everyone, we have
some very happy news.
Lilith is going to
be married again.
To who?
Someone else.
Oh, that's great!
Congratulations!
Wonderful!
Oh. Yes.
Just wonderful.
When's the happy occasion?
Tomorrow in Las Vegas.
Oh, Lilith, how
delightfully kitschy.
It's your second marriage,
so you've decided to
poke fun at the institution
by getting married in the tackiest
place you could possibly choose.
Brian's family
lives in Las Vegas.
Well, isn't that convenient?
You'll have someone to
show you the museums.
It was lovely
seeing you all again.
I'll just walk you out.
( sighs)
Well, I hope you haven't
found all this too unsettling.
No, no.
You know, I think
it's actually good
that you're getting remarried.
Knowing us, we could have
spent the rest of our lives
wondering whether our
divorce was a mistake...
If we should have
tried to work it out.
Was it me? Was it you?
Was it us? Was it you?
Now we can move on.
What's next for you?
I suppose I'll try to smooth
things over with Madeline.
Try very hard, Frasier.
She seems worth it.
Well, she'll need convincing.
You know, I guess
I could ask her back
to Bora Bora with me, try again.
You know, I'll lay on the
whole package this time.
I'll buy the
airplane tickets first
and pay for the hotel,
get a limo, champagne,
a little caviar... The
whole nine yards.
Any luck, I'll sweep her
off her feet and into my bed.
I do own it, you know.
( elevator bell rings)
Would you like
to kiss the bride?
It'd be my pleasure.
You're really happy for me?
Well, yes, of course.
You'll understand, though,
if I don't jump up and
down and yell "yippee!"
Yes, I've already seen that.
( sighs contentedly)
( waves crashing, birds
singing, insects chirping)
MADELINE: Now, why don't we
pick up where we left off, Frasier?
Oh, my God.
WOMAN: Frasier?
Oh, my God!
Oh, God!
Oh.
Oh, my...
Oh, God, I just had the...
most frightening dream.
Thank God I'm here with you.
Frasier, we have all week
to analyze your dream.
Right now there's a
huge bug in the shower.
( jazz plays)
♪ Hey, baby, I hear
the blues are callin' ♪
♪ Tossed salads
and scrambled eggs ♪
Quite stylish.
♪ And maybe I
seem a bit confused ♪
♪ Well, maybe, but
I got you pegged ♪
Ha-ha-ha-ha!
♪ But I don't know what to do ♪
♪ With those tossed
salads and scrambled eggs ♪
♪ They're callin' again. ♪
Frasier has left the building.