Franklin & Bash (2011–2014): Season 1, Episode 7 - Franklin vs. Bash - full transcript

Falling in love with that bod.

Eyes above the waist.
Come on, now.

- We are intelligent humans.
- Where you going?

Amber North, Simone Winters,
erotic-aerobic instructors?

Oh, hello. Owners of Rock & Pole?
That's catchy.

We didn't rob those bitches.

L.A.P.D. said they found a 50,000-dollar
ring in your workout bag...

...after you taught an in-home
pole-dancing class. Amber?

I'm Amber. She's Simone. I don't know
how that ring got in our bag.

We didn't take that lady's necklace.

- Someone's messing with us.
- Well...



...our job is no different than yours.
We're here to get you off.

That lynx tracked my scent...

...across the entire north ridge
of the Peters Glacier.

Now, luckily, she only got
a piece of my flesh...

...and not my determination
to summit Denali.

That's amazing, Mr. Infeld.

Hey, you know,
I should climb Denali next.

That's a good...
Oh, Hanna, Damien.

I'd like you to meet our new client.
This is Alex Carlisle.

Alex rode his bicycle all the way
up here from Orange County.

Last time I checked, Stanton,
we don't do curfew violations.

Actually, I wanna be the youngest
kayaker to solo the Amazon.

But my dad won't let me.

He's being sponsored by the founder
of Outdoor Apparel...



...but his father
has placed a preliminary injunction...

...to stop him from going.

- How old are you, Alex?
- I'm 13.

Oh, this is not your
ordinary teenager, Hanna, no.

IQ: 173.
Master Falcon Scout at 9.

And there isn't a river
I can't kayak blindfolded.

Cool. It's a suicide mission.

We might as well ask permission...

...to let him jump his Schwinn
across the Grand Canyon.

What if somebody told
Alexander the Great...

...he was too young to rule...

...or a young Kobayashi
that he couldn't eat 60 hot dogs?

No. Great achievements
involve great risk.

Well, we welcome the challenge.
Alex is very inspiring.

Thanks for your support.

It's an honour to meet a boy
as brave as you.

You're very kind,
but it's been a while since I was a boy.

- Ladies.
- Hello.

Made it to the high-rise,
but still working out of the basement.

- Let's blast the roof off this joint.
- Eddie and Hagar?

- Hagar sells tequila now.
- Noted. Retro Roth?

Judge Douglas,
the DA would have you believe...

...that our clients are merely
two women with drop-dead legs...

...who dance the night away.

These beautiful girls
are entrepreneurs...

...who built their business
from the ground up.

They aren't running with the devil.

They're using Van Halen song titles
as a defence.

- You really got me.
- Don't push your luck, gentlemen.

We'd like to enter a plea
of " not guilty. "

And request our clients' release
on their own recognizance.

Your Honour,
Miss North and Miss Winters...

...stand accused of stealing 350,000
dollars' worth of jewellery...

...after drugging their victims
during a glorified sex show.

- Drugging those housewives?
- We would never do that.

The state requests bail be set
at $100,000.

That's ridiculous, Your Honour.
They have no prior records.

And their 6-inch stilettos
make flight risk nearly impossible.

The defendants are released
on their own recognizance.

- There you go.
- Next case, Miss Ross.

- What is this?
- I don't know.

Dirty twirlers has been
on our vision board since law school.

You know, Amber is a former
Clippers cheerleader.

I recognise those moves.

Oh, man. I mean, it's like catching
a mermaid in the same net.

About an hour
after this footage was shot...

...the guests passed out
from laced margaritas...

...woke up cleaned out.

What does the toxicology report say?

Hycobine. French Vicodin.
Very rare.

Sounds naughtier
than regular Vicodin.

Amber and Simone
never even heard of it.

They said they taught the class,
things got crazy, so they bolted.

How'd the cops find
the engagement ring in their bag?

The police searched their apartment
when Amber wasn't there.

Simone claims
that they shared the bag.

Amber wasn't there,
but it's her apartment.

Simone didn't have the authority
to let the police in.

Illegal search and seizure.

Get that ring tossed out,
and Janie's case falls apart.

Come in. Where's Pindar?

Hey. Our favourite defendants.

What is with the sad faces?

Tell them what you told me
in the steam room.

Three years ago,
I worked for a club in Arizona.

You know, the other kind of dancing.

There's no shame in being versatile.

She robbed the club's safe,
spent 30 days in jail.

The manager screwed me
out of my tips.

- I only took what was owed me.
- This totally sucks.

Coming from money doesn't make you
an angel. We work the same pole.

My douche-bag lawyer
sold me out in court.

It happened so fast, they...

They booked me
under my stage name, "Sherry Pie. "

Nobody ever knew.

If Janie had this info, she would've
rubbed it in our faces by now.

We worked so hard
to finally go legit.

Now we're back
where everyone expects us to be.

Hey, listen, it's gonna be fine.
By the time we're done...

...every milfy housewife and cougar's
gonna be lining up...

...to take lessons from you again,
okay?

- Single for a smile?
- Hey.

- What?
- A five.

I've read your motion to have the ring
deemed inadmissible. I deny it.

Approach, Your Honour?

Your Honour, this is a textbook
Fourth Amendment violation.

As you two should know...

...the defendants cohabited
at the time of arrest...

...implying a commonality
of privileges. So denied.

Can you nod
like we're saying something smart?

Go away.

Your Honour, some new evidence
came to our office this morning:

Fingerprints on an upstairs door
matching Simone Winters'...

...the same door
containing the stolen necklace.

You bitch.
That's what you were doing upstairs?

- I went to look for the bathroom.
- Okay. Defrost.

Like when I caught you
in my Louboutins?

This is not the place.

- Deep breaths. Happy thoughts.
- I borrowed those.

- Quiet contest, starting now.
- I am not going to prison for her.

You are making this way too easy.

Squabbling clients.

You know, you try to rescue
two drowning swimmers at once...

...you go down with them.
You have to let one go.

What if they're both innocent?

See, there is another way.
We could put up a Chinese wall.

Yes, the Great Wall of China itself.
Choose a side, stick to it.

- We split up the women between us.
- The firm keeps the case.

Don't be fooled, boys.

I've seen many partnerships destroyed
by the divisive nature of the wall.

Our friendship has survived
a lot worse.

Yeah. We didn't talk the entire summer
Peter was at jazz camp.

- Rock camp.
- With clarinets.

Your responsibility will be
to your clients, not each other.

- Yeah.
- Yeah. Trying the same case alone.

You betray a confidence,
you could be disbarred.

- Our lips are sealed.
- All right.

You have my blessing.

Franklin v. Bash it is.

The jury would look unfavourably
on new counsel.

So to keep everyone happy...

...Jared and I have decided
to represent each of you individually.

- Separate lawyers, same courtroom.
- Everything's like it was...

...except you can't discuss the details
of the case with each other.

By the way,
you're doing a terrific job.

How are we supposed
to pick between you?

To avoid the awkwardness
of upsetting Jared...

...we've chosen.
Amber, you're with me. Simone, Jared.

So not cool
if Amber gets the better lawyer.

Which one of you is smarter?

- We're both equally...
- I am.

Ask Peter who got 179 on his LSAT.

Same guy who cried
when he lost his last trial.

Who won the appeal?

- Pindar agrees with me. Pindar?
- No, Pindar's with me.

Karaoke brothers for life.

I'm sorry. I'm working
on Karp's Amazon River case.

The candiru fish
can swim up your urethra...

...and live in your penis for weeks.

Oh, Infeld's got me trailing
a Jamaican guy who stole his identity...

...so you guys are on your own.

Our goal is to show the judge that,
despite your age...

...you're competent enough
to paddle down the Amazon.

Which means
we may have to put you on the stand.

Some of opposing counsel's questions
won't be very friendly.

Mr. Karp,
I'll be paddling down 2000 miles...

...of rapids in a kayak. What's swimming
in the water, flying in the air...

...and crawling on the shore
can kill me in a matter of seconds.

- I'll be fine.
- All right, then. Good to hear.

- Can I ask you two a question?
- Sure.

- Do either of you have kids?
- No.

Do you want them?

- Maybe.
- Sure.

- Alex, I'll be in the car.
- Okay, Dad. I'll be a minute.

Don't forget to validate.

Right.

You and your father
seem to be on good terms...

- ... despite him trying to stop you.
- He's a good guy. He just worries.

Ladies, thanks for coming
to Infeld Daniels.

No problem.

They shot a deodorant commercial
at my house last week.

It's being repainted.

This is almost preferable
to the paint fumes.

Well, I'm flattered.
So just to clarify, Miss McDowell...

...your house is where
the robbery took place?

- Is that accurate?
- That's right.

Simone and Amber performed there
for the pole-dancing class...

...and we each took turns
trying out the moves they taught us.

Really?
What kind of moves, for the...?

The Anaconda. The Jackhammer.

They had us spread our legs,
grind against the pole...

...spinning, thrusting.

The Jackhammer. I see.

You stated to the police that my client,
Amber North, never left the pole.

Well, I don't remember.
I was drugged.

- They had to have been upstairs.
- But a lot went on that night.

I mean, your first girl-on-girl kiss
can be confusing.

- Lots of fuzzy feelings...
- Nothing's fuzzy.

Amber and Simone seduced us,
then stole our stuff.

So nothing is fuzzy.

How was it any different
than any other book-club meeting?

We don't usually get naked
and do tequila shots off each other.

Oh, okay. So your bra fell off,
your panties fell off.

Not impossible your ring...

Slipped off with everything else
and ended up in the girls' bag?

They were casing the place
from the moment they got there.

Amber's fingerprints
weren't anywhere upstairs...

...near the jewellery. Isn't it possible
my client never made it up there?

- Are you hitting on me?
- I don't know. Am I?

Mr. Bash, your client took
an excellent business opportunity...

...and threw it away.

We should throw
our own pole-dancing party...

...for Brentwood housewives.

Can't talk about it.

- I'm not discussing the case.
- Can't talk about it.

Come on.
Look at you, all by-the-book.

- Has that ever worked for you?
- You mean, worked for us?

Yeah. You, me, family.
What you got?

- Come on.
- Come on.

- Dude.
- Dude.

- Come on.
- Come on.

No phantom smells.
You're both wearing shirts.

We also have a strict pop-by policy.
What's the password?

- Chinese wall.
- That's two words.

As much as I'd love to see you go at it
like gladiators, I brought a gift.

I get one?

Whoever comes to me first gets
to walk. Second place gets 10 years.

She's just trying
to divide and conquer.

- Yeah, get inside our heads.
- Yeah.

- It's not gonna work.
- No.

Seriously?

It's for you. It's your mother.

Come to order.

Defence calls Mike Bennett.

Mr. Bennett, can you tell us
your role at Scott Avenue Productions?

I'm a painter.
When we go on location...

...I paint the rental homes
to accommodate our sets.

After the robbery, you did work
at Miss McDowell's house...

...for a deodorant commercial?

Yeah. I painted everything sierra tan:
cabinets, doors, moulding.

And then what? Did you repaint
everything back to its original colour?

Spanish sand.

During deposition,
you stated that painting those doors...

...was a pain in the ass because you
had to take the doors off their hinges.

We had to line them up
and hit them with a spray gun.

Right.

Have you seen the movie
The Fugitive?

Yeah, like a hundred times.

- Harrison Ford in his prime.
- Absolutely.

Lost my Sexiest Man Alive crown
to him more than once.

- Objection.
- I'm sorry.

Is Mr. Bash implying that
he's the only one allowed to be cute?

Withdrawn.

The most frustrating part of that movie
is the jury convicts Dr. Kimble...

...only because they couldn't find that
freaky one-armed killer's fingerprints.

- Objection.
- On what grounds?

The movie reference.

The self-deprecating joke.
Buttoning the jacket.

Those are my moves.
He's stealing them.

Overruled.

Mr. Bennett, is it possible that
the reason my client's fingerprints...

...were on the bedroom doorknob...

...was because that door
was actually the bathroom door?

Yeah, it's possible, I guess.
They're supposed to be identical...

...but I rearranged them
a few times, yeah.

So my client's fingerprints might have
been on the bathroom door...

...as she claimed.

Thank you, Mr. Bennett.

It's all yours, pal.

Hi, sir. Hello.

How are you? Hi.

Hey. Hi.

Oh, come on. Objection.

He's hitting on the entire jury box,
Your Honour.

Thank you.

My uniform is totally lame.
I look like a tool in front of Hanna.

Oh, your accomplishments
will impress the judge.

Do I have to wear
the nut-hugger shorts?

I didn't design the uniform.

You're not making 13
any easier on him.

Tell us how you earned
your Plant Science badge.

I can identify over 5000 edible,
medicinal and poisonous plants.

Relevance, Your Honour.
A practical understanding of survival...

...doesn't guarantee that Alex
can adapt his knowledge under duress.

Sustained. Miss Linden.

I have an affidavit
from Dr. Harold Cohen...

...an entomologist on staff at UCLA.

He certified that the contents
of this box...

...include four harmless insects
and one poisonous one...

...all of which Alex could encounter
on his trip down the Amazon.

Camel cricket.

Madagascar hissing cockroach.

Bamboo worm.

- You missed one.
- Wouldn't do that, Your Honour.

Lonomia caterpillars cause foaming
of the mouth and kidney failure.

Your witness.

Hey.

Can I talk to you for a minute,
off the record?

I know that face. Guy troubles.
What'd he do?

Took a case he'll lose...

...because his best friend's
kicking his ass.

- Here we go.
- I'm just calling it like I see it.

Either you've never carried
your own weight...

...or I've underestimated
Jared's ability.

See, I know what you're doing,
and you're not gonna get in my head.

Do what's best for your client.

Reconsider the deal.

Oh, look at that. Jared just texted.

Wonder what he wants.

Being a Falcon Scout should set you
apart from other boys in the woods.

It's the highest rank attainable
in the Trail Scouts of America.

But the only time you spent in the wild
was with Outward Bound...

- ... where they called you "wuss. "
- Objection. Argumentative.

- Mr. Lavetta.
- Isn't that what they called you, Alex?

- Yes.
- And didn't they call you "wuss"...

...because you left three days
into your two-week hike?

- Look, they were immature.
- Why did you leave early?

Please answer the question, Alex.

- I was worried about my father.
- Enlighten us.

How were you able
to interpret his feelings...

...in the middle of
the Rocky Mountains? Smoke signals?

- I just knew, okay?
- Sounds like an excuse.

- Leave me alone.
- Objection.

Please instruct counsel
to stop badgering the witness.

You were homesick, weren't you?
Weren't you?

Ease up, Don.

Your Honour, we request a recess.

Give me a break, Mr. Lavetta.

Look, I'll be wrestling crocodiles.

Takes a little more than that
to make me cry.

Request for recess withdrawn,
Your Honour.

Awesome.

You're so sweet. Thank you.
But honestly, it's genetics.

I haven't touched a weight
in 30 years.

- You never lift weights?
- Never.

And I can eat anything I want.

Carmen,
would you remind Mr. Bash...

...I reserved the hot tub
from to 10 to 10:30?

- He can hear you.
- Pindar, tell Mr. Franklin...

...that I'm using this time as restitution
for using my moves.

- Mr. Franklin, Mr. Bash would...
- Used your moves?

I loaned you my persona.

We made you the charming one
for marketing purposes.

You know what?
Keep my moves as a gift.

But you're not stealing anything else.

- Really?
- Yeah.

Universal remote. Mine.
Nana gave it to me for my birthday.

No, universal remote is mine.
Super BowI winnings, my friends.

- Make this stop.
- Good luck doing Franklin and Bash...

- ... without the Bash.
- You're billing yourself as "the Bash"?

Aren't you guys both supposed
to be on our side?

You know what? Keep it.

- Don't want it.
- Don't want it.

If it wasn't for the Bash...

...you'd still be waxing
your daddy's Jag.

If the moves I stole were so fantastic,
how come Janie dumped the Bash?

- Mine's much bigger.
- I've never been concerned about size.

- We went over that when we dated.
- I'm not here to flirt.

You need shelter from a tumbling wall
that's about to crush you.

Not saying that I want your deal,
but my client is curious.

Would she have to
acknowledge her guilt?

Help me take down Simone. Amber can
plead petty theft as a misdemeanour.

That's three years' probation.

We could back the truck up
with incriminating testimony.

What was that about
incriminating testimony, partner?

You gave him the deal?
His client's guilty.

You wouldn't be here
if my client was guilty.

Simone targeted Amber.

Bad influence corrupts schoolgirl.
Classic porno story line.

Exactly why Amber put it on Simone.
Catholic schoolgirls are the wildest.

Janie, where do I sign?

No. Deal's off.
Watching you sell each other out...

...seems I can definitely
get convictions on both defendants.

- Oh, it's on.
- Like " Donkey Kong. "

Simone, as an entrepreneur...

...it is in your interest
to keep a clean record, correct?

I could lose my business licence.

Because Rock & Pole's categorized
as sexually oriented...

...I have to pass
routine background checks.

I'm submitting a copy
of Miss Winters' business licence...

...to show it's currently up-to-date.

One moment, Your Honour.

The business licence
is under your name.

Why not Amber's?

Amber failed the background check.
Never paid her credit cards...

...and some company reported her
for fraud.

Objection, Your Honour.

Prejudicial impact
outweighs probative value.

- Overruled.
- Fraud. Financial problems.

No more questions.

Miss Winters, could you tell us
all the aliases you've danced under?

I've used a lot of names:
Serenity, Jade, Diamond.

Have you ever been Sherry Pie?

I...

I used that name
at a topless bar in Arizona.

The same bar
whose safe you were convicted...

- ... of robbing three years ago.
- Objection.

Betrayal?

Withdrawn.

Think the jury knows
exactly what's going on here.

This is supposed
to be a business meeting.

I'm tired of talking about me.
Let's talk about you.

- Alex, you're 13.
- Age is arbitrary.

When you're ready for an adventure,
you're ready.

Sorry I'm late. Stanton had to dry-run
his Bohemian Grove speech.

I wasn't expecting company.

- Everything okay?
- Perfect timing.

I was just about to ask Alex
why he left Outward Bound.

My Dad's divorce hit him hard.

And his anniversary
happened during my trip.

Once I made it to the mountains,
I felt bad, so I came home.

That's a beautiful story.
How do we persuade the judge...

...you won't feel the same way
in South America?

Mr. Karp, could you excuse us?

I made go-karting reservations
for Hanna and myself.

Alex, I'm gonna be
in court all afternoon.

That's okay.

I'm free all week.

Very smooth. I've always found that
the quickest way to a woman's heart...

...is through go-karting.

I'm about to break a world record.

What have you ever done
that a girl would care about?

Well, the Clippers dropped me
from my contract after I tore my ACL.

Terminated contract.
Surgery on the knee.

- Credit cards piled up.
- I have a supportive family.

My father helped me pay them off,
but the damage was already done.

Miss North's credit-card and bank
statements are marked and entered.

She had no outstanding debts...

...and maintained positive cash flow
prior to the robbery.

- Thank you.
- Thank you.

Your witness.

Bailiff, can we get a chair
for Mr. Bash?

Miss North, have you had
any recent medical procedures...

...other than your ACL surgery?

Yes, but I...

That information
is extremely personal.

Well, Miss North, I'm sure
your secret is safe here.

Please.

I had my deviated septum repaired
to stop snoring.

And what pain medication
were you prescribed during recovery?

I don't recall the name of it.

Page 6, would you read aloud
the prescription...

...you had refilled two months ago?

- Hycobine.
- Hycobine.

The same French drug
used to knock out the housewives.

I didn't have it on me that night.

Then this must be
the most convenient excuse...

...in the history
of convenient excuses.

No further questions.

One Degree of Bowie mix...

...I promised to make you
for your birthday...

...two years ago.

" Dolls, Iggy, P. Diddy. "

We broke our pact
to never let a case come between us.

Actually, our pact was to never work
Mondays or Fridays.

Seems like last week
we were sitting here...

...waiting for rollerbladers to crash
into unlicensed street vendors.

- Where'd it all go?
- That was last week.

Remember?
Simmons v. Hot Diggity Dosa?

Remember the first guy we represented
for indecent exposure?

Bongo Tom.

We argued it wasn't public...

...because he got naked in his alley
where he lived.

What are we gonna do?

We already won this case for Janie.

Not if we get the band back together.

Forget everything we said. Our defence
is strongest when we're a team.

We need to destroy our wall
and become the new New Berlin.

I'd rather keep the wall.
I don't wanna help Simone.

Okay, if you keep the wall,
you both go away for five years.

Jared and I have learned a valuable
lesson through this.

The greatest success stories
come from duos.

Simon and Garfunkel.
Richards and Jagger.

R2 and 3PO. Tom and Jerry.

Ice-dancing sensations
Torvill & Dean.

- No.
- I can't go back to jail.

I don't ever wanna go.

There we go.
See? This feels right. Yeah.

I hiked Runyon this morning.

The hard trail.

Might tackle the Super Sprint Triathlon
in San Diego.

- He's gotten to you, hasn't he?
- Who? No. Come on.

- I'm not threatened by a 13-year-old.
- That's the problem.

When a kid succeeds
at something adults fear...

...grown-ups lose their power.

You don't think we should've
put him on the stand?

- I don't know.
- Dad, don't get hysterical.

It's just a flat tyre.

No, I already called the road club.

Dad, just stay on the phone with me
until they get there, okay? Just...

All right, half an hour.
I'll take the Wilshire bus...

I think we put the wrong kid
on the stand.

Okay, Pindar,
you're starting to scare me.

Will you stop watching that?

Can't look away.
It's just so beautiful.

How did McDowell find you?

We're friends with Kesha's
choreographers. They referred us.

Miss McDowell bailed on them at
the last minute. It was too expensive.

Too expensive for Brentwood?
How much do poles cost?

Those girls are the best.
They charge 5 G's.

That's what the housewives said
they paid you.

I wish. We only got 2 grand.
Who got the rest?

Dr. Etienne gave me my high beams.

You're killing me, okay?

I can't access both parts of my brain
at once.

Dr. Etienne? He's the plastic surgeon
who did my nose job.

French doctor.

Same French doctor
could mean same French drug.

Why would Miss McDowell rob herself
and her friends?

- It's pretty thin.
- We've had thinner.

This one's gonna need
a feeding tube.

Okay, so she wasn't home.

But I did find something
you'll recognise from the old days.

- Foreclosure notices.
- Hey.

I look ed into
Scott Avenue Productions.

They started working with
Miss McDowell six months ago.

She calls and begs them
to book her home.

- So she's house rich and cash poor.
- What about the jewellery?

My pawnshop boys haven't heard
anything that matches.

Try to sell a 300,000-dollar necklace,
she'd trigger Homeland Security.

She went to the bank
the day after the robbery.

Didn't make deposits
or withdraw money.

If she didn't make deposits,
what was McDowell doing there?

Maybe she wasn't depositing money.
What about a safe-deposit box?

Dr. Carlisle, could you describe
the circumstances...

...under which your marriage ended?

Alex's mother left us six years ago
to paint watercolour landscapes...

...in Albuquerque with her instructor,
Alphonso.

Transition must've been difficult,
being a single parent.

Alex and I do just fine.

How often do you do the laundry?

Couple of times a week, I assume.
Alex does the laundry.

- Who manages your bills?
- Alex.

So on top of training
for kayaking competitions...

...earning badges and being a genius,
he does your bookkeeping?

It's not unusual for a boy
to have after-school chores.

- Grocery shopping, who does that?
- My son also goes to the supermarket.

I'm sorry, but, Dr. Carlisle,
what exactly are your chores?

Seems like Alex supervises
every aspect of your life.

We take care of each other,
Mr. Karp.

That's what families do.

And who's gonna take care of you
when Alex is on that river?

No one.

I mean, me.
I'll take care of myself.

You're not worried about
Alex being alone in the jungle.

Are you?

- You're worried about him leaving you.
- Don't listen to him, Dad.

Alex.

It's okay, Alex.

I'm fine.

And I'll be fine...

...while you're on your trip.

What is it that couldn't wait?

We have evidence that implicates
Miss McDowell in the robbery.

She had access to the same drugs
as our clients.

I don't wanna know how
you obtained this, Mr. Franklin.

Ninety-five percent of what I did
is 100-percent legal.

- You'll see in our motion.
- You want me to accept this?

We'd like to subpoena her safe-deposit
box. She's concealing the jewellery.

We're in the middle of trial.
We can't accept new evidence this late.

We're asking a bit of leeway,
not that we deserve it.

It is not my problem that opposing
counsel wasted their resources...

...trying to decapitate each other.

I've watched you tear each other apart
at the expense of your clients all week.

Turned my courtroom
into a dinner theatre.

And now you expect me
to introduce your encore?

- Miss McDowell framed our clients.
- Miss McDowell is not on trial.

- Your Honour...
- Denied.

Miss McDowell, can you explain
why you had your necklace appraised?

Insurance won't issue a policy
without a certified appraisal.

Three-hundred-thousand-dollar
necklace...

- ... and you never had it insured?
- My timing was fortunate.

Miraculous...

...considering you needed $300,000
to save your home from foreclosure.

- Objection.
- Mr. Franklin, you've been warned.

Your honour, if Miss McDowell
does not have the diamond necklace...

...then she'll be okay with me opening
her safe-deposit box.

- With your permission, Miss McDowell.
- Hold it. I've seen this bluff before.

That box doesn't belong to her,
does it?

- It's mine, Your Honour.
- I should hold you in contempt.

Instead, I'll admit your box.

Go on. Amuse us
with your precious valuables.

I'll take... I'll take contempt,
Your Honour. That's fair.

You need a dose of your own medicine,
Mr. Franklin. Open the box.

Okay.

It's a VHS of WrestleMania VIII,
Ric Flair vs. Macho Man.

Reba sang the national anthem.
It was...

...angelic.

Lady Gaga's chewing gum.

She gave it to me, more or less.

Programme for Joseph and
the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat.

My wife and I caught that twice
on Broadway.

This is my high-school production.

I was the butler.

And I think that is about it,
Your Honour. There's nothing else...

Everything in that box
is evidence in this court.

Your Honour, this is just
a prescription for Hycobine...

...Miss McDowell refilled
two days prior to the robbery.

That's not mine.

Mr. Franklin,
I ruled that evidence inadmissible.

But, Your Honour, you ordered me
to admit it, against my wishes.

Objection, Your Honour.

Overruled.

Bring it home, pal.

Miss McDowell, let's talk about
one of my favourite topics: breasts.

- Excuse me?
- Oh, I'm sorry. I forgot.

- You like to call them your high beams.
- Objection. Relevance.

Those breasts
were her partner in crime.

Why not? I've already given you
enough rope to hang yourself.

You had Hycobine in your system
because Dr. Etienne prescribed it...

...after your breast-enlargement
surgery.

Pinning the crime on Amber and Simone
would distract the insurance company...

...from investigating the loss
of your diamond necklace, wouldn't it?

You laced those drinks and stole
your own jewellery, didn't you?

Thanks for playing, Red.
Good game.

Good. No hard feelings.

Regrettably, I'm unable to attend your
engagement soiree next weekend.

I have my annual check-up
with my Mats?s shaman.

Engagement party. Didn't invite me.

- Thank you, Stanton.
- I have one just like it. Please.

The phoenix and the dragon.

Two mythological beasts entwined,
both ferocious yet beautiful.

Ready to devour each other
or copulate in magnificent harmony.

Nathan will love it. Thank you.

Who's Nathan?

Well, chalk up another victory for team
Franklin and Bash.

You knew exactly what you were doing
when you allowed the Chinese wall.

I know this much, Mr. Bash:

You never value what you have until
it's gone.

Thanks for dropping the case.

I trusted you to make decisions for me
all these years.

Maybe it's time you do that
for yourself.

Come here.

- You were good with Alex.
- I'm good with anyone who flatters me.

I think it's a little more than that.

You know having a kid
could never make you ordinary.

Congratulations, team.

I commend your instinct
about putting my dad on the stand.

That's very high praise.

The Amazon does not stand a chance
against you.

I'm going.

Hanna, we both know the stress
distance can put on a relationship.

I can't ask you
to put your life on hold.

- Alex...
- Just kidding.

Look, you're supersonic hot.

Can I call you in 15 years?

Ten.

Thank you.

Oh, look at this.
Oh, you see? Yes. Yes.

- Yeah.
- Just feels like yes.

You know they're not clients,
so it's fair game.

Nearly broke us up.
They could be cursed.

But it's your call.

What are my odds at getting another
shot at a former cheerleader?

Why do you get Amber?

- You wanted to send her to jail.
- That was business.

I'm fine with either.

Yeah, they will be too.
We're win-win.

You know it.

You get one shot
with the hottest twins on the planet.

- Can they be conjoined?
- No, that's one person.

"Twin" twins.