Faking It (2014–2016): Season 3, Episode 7 - Game On - full transcript

Previously on Faking It...

Did you set me up?

I thought I'd psyche you out a little.

Maybe we just try being friends.

Yeah, let's... Let's give that a shot.

We have a thing, don't we?

Well, no, we can't
have a thing, not now.

I can earn your trust back.

To do that, I think I should move out.

I'll let you crash on my couch.

Amy?



Look, Karma, it's Sabrina!

Camp Kichi-Wawa had everything,

the s'mores, the lake.

Don't forget bunk five!

We were The Three Amigas.

OMG, we ruled.

Look at us now, back together
and better than ever!

Maybe there is hope for One Direction.

How lucky are we that her
dad transferred here?

So, so, so lucky.

You guys, stop.

I'm the lucky one.

Aww.

Seriously, what's the
drug scene like here?



I've been dying to try bath salts.

You guys in?

Karma, she's kidding!

Sabrina, I forgot all about

your great sense of humor.

Well, as fun as this trip
down memory lane has been,

I have to go,

'cause Shane and I are holding
auditions for our band.

'Cause I'm in a band.

Good for you, Karm,

living out your Taylor Swift dreams.

Amy and I will spend time catching up.

I guess I can be a little late.

Karma, no, don't worry.

Sabrina lives here now,
so you will have plenty

of one-on-one time with her too.

That's exactly what I wanted!

- Ugh!
- Here, let me.

I almost had it.

Yeah, I know,

but I'm happy to help, since I'm here.

Speaking of which, how
much longer can I stay?

'Cause I can be even more
helpful if you like.

I'm not having sex with you.

What?

No, no, no, I was not suggesting that.

I just...

I dig it here.

You do?

Yeah, what's not to like?

800 count sheets,

potpourri in the bathroom.

Citrus Cilantro.

It's my personal blend.

Also, my next option

is sleeping in my car.

And we all know how filthy

that back seat must be.

Fine, you can stay.

Just don't piss me off.

Yeah, got it.

Don't worry, I got all the rules down.

Lights out by 10:00, no shoes indoors,

toilet seat down, label all my food...

You make it sound like I'm your warden.

Not at all.

I love rules!

Shane's house was a free-for-all,

nonstop fun and games.

Are you saying I'm not fun?

Different people have
different definitions of fun.

For me, my fun is helping
out around here.

Don't forget that.

Okay, I'm gonna go to school.

Do you want to walk together?

No?

Okay, then.

(MANDOLIN STRUMMING)

Okay, Cindy, thanks.

We'll be in touch.

I await with bated breath.

That's the third person you've cut off.

You know this is Hester,

not the school from "Fame," right?

Well, none of these people are right.

And?

And I'm in a hurry.

Because?

Because I'm nervous
about leaving Amy alone

with that phony, two-faced Sabrina!

I thought you guys
were The Three Amigas.

Oh no, señor.

Sabrina is no amiga of mine.

In front of Amy, she acted
all nice and sweet.

Hey guys, look, a blue jay!

No way! Where?

But the second she turned her back,

Sabrina's claws came out.

- Ow!
- Oops.

Sorry, Karm.

To make matters worse,

Sabrina and Amy were in a bunk together,

and my bunk was across camp.

Nighty night, Karm.

It was clear, Sabrina was
trying to push me out.

I had to do something,

so each night, I'd
sneak into their bunk,

until someone tipped off night duty.

Let me guess.

You think it was Sabrina.

Well, after that, she had
Amy to herself every night.

Karma, I know that 12-year-old you

thinks Sabrina was out to get you,

but don't you think it's possible

you were just jealous
Amy had a new friend?

Okay, I know sometimes I can be

a little possessive of Amy,

but that's not what is happening here.

Sabrina is not who she
portrays herself to be.

She is bad news.

Karma, even if your memories
of Sabrina are correct...

- Which they are.
- Uh-huh.

Are you the same person you were then?

No.

Well, maybe Sabrina isn't either.

You're right.

I should give her a second chance.

Way to take my advice.

Okay, next!

You guys are the Double Puntendres?

I thought you were Zhe and Zhim.

We're just workshopping names.

Um, you're here to audition?

I am.

Apparently paying gigs want bands,

so I need to be in one.

Pity!

Unfortunately, we're looking

for a guitar player

and not a manipulative backstabber.

Best of luck, though!

Will you excuse us for a second?

I know what you're gonna say,

and I don't care that
Noah's incredibly talented

and has great eyebrows.

He betrayed me,

and people like that never change.

But we just agreed that
Sabrina and I both changed.

This is different.

Never gonna happen.

Bye.

Remember when Jessica F
lost her canoe paddle

and drifted into the lake?

Do I!

They found her, right?

I'm pretty sure.

Hey, pop quiz in Sacred Sites.

Study that Shinto shrine.

Oh, thanks for the heads up, Felix.

Oh, by the way, meet Sabrina.

She just moved here, and she's the best.

I'm sorry to see you've fallen in

with a such a bad crowd so soon.

She does seem pretty sketchy,

but I'll take my chances.

Don't say I didn't warn you.

Why did you let me blah
blah blah about Jessica F

when we could have been
talking about Felix?

He is super cute.

Are you guys dating?

Long story short, no, not dating.

Oh, is there another guy in the picture?

Nope, no guy,

or girl, for that matter.

Oh!

You always talked about boys at camp,

so I just assumed.

Man, that was Republican of me.

No, it's been a rather
recent development.

How about you?

I have a boyfriend.

We're trying the long-distance thing.

What can I say?

I'm a masochist.

Hey, hey, hey!

I'm back!

And Sabrina, I apologize,

but you're gonna have to repeat

everything you told Amy,

because I need a crash
course in all things you.

Man, I don't even know where to start.

I mean, we covered a lot of ground.

Oh, well, hey, why don't
we all hang out tonight?

It'll be like old times,
only now we're older

and wiser and more mature.

Great idea, Karm!

The Three Amigas back in action!

- Yes!
- What should we do?

I've never robbed a
convenience store before.

(LAUGHS)

(CELL PHONES RINGING)

Oh.

(PLAYFUL MUSIC)

(DOORBELL RINGS)

We... we're all seeing this, right?

Come in, have fun,

and feel free to leave your shoes on.

Liam will take your coats.

Welcome.

This is a serious game night.

BOTH: This is Lauren.

BOTH: Jinx!

Hey, so I just wanted to say,

thank you for inviting me to this

even though you don't know me that well.

Thank you for coming.

A lot of my followers are nerds,

so I wanted to show them
I accept their kind.

Smile!

(CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS)

So you're living with Lauren?

That's a little weird, right?

No!

I mean, it's surprising, sure,

but no, it's not weird at all.

Liam, the door?

- Hey.
- Hey.

What is he doing here?

Oh, I invited him.

This is Noah.

- Hi.
- Hi.

Okay, enough with the chitchat.

Let's get to the fun, shall we?

We've got a schedule to keep.

Okay, first of all, let's pick teams.

Oh, I'm so excited we're
on the same team.

Yeah.

Oh, me too!

The Three Amigas back en la casa.

Our team is going to crush you guys.

Yeah.

These two are so close,

they can practically
read each other's minds.

Oh, wait, she's totally right.

- They should be split up.
- Agreed.

Wait, hold on.

It's Lauren's game night.

Lauren, you decide.

Well, I don't want to be
accused of winning unfairly,

so Karma, switch with
someone from Team Two.

- What?
- Take Noah!

Sorry, Karma.

Looks like my evil plan
to get rid of you worked.

Jeez, I was just kidding.

I love how you fall for that every time.

(LAUGHS)

Yeah, good one, Sabrina.

(UPBEAT INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC)

- Uh, it's a movie...
- She's a hooker.

People say it's a romantic comedy

but really least romantic
movie in the world.

Oh, "Pretty Woman"!

- Yes!
- Yes!

A lame duck.

You're yesterday's news.

Someone's trying to replace you.

- You think so?
- What?

No, I'm talking about your card.

Karma, no peeking.

Oh, that's your first infraction!

(SIGHS)

Karma, one.

- Uh, circle!
- Circle!

- Hula hoop.
- The Earth.

- Circle!
- Round!

- "The Lion King."
- Circle of Life?

- Do something other than point!
- Do something.

(TIMER RINGING)

What was it?

- A pizza.
- Dude...

You couldn't even draw
a (BLEEP) pepperoni?

Your art's really gone downhill, huh?

Okay, so Team Two got
no points that round,

so we keep the lead.

Way to be a disaster, Booker.

Okay, five minute break.

Any longer than that, and
we'll lose our momentum.

Hey, guys, so I've been finding

cans and bottles in the trash.

Can we please try to
remember to recycle?

Okay, what is going on?

You're acting like
Lauren's little bitch.

No, I'm not.

I don't know you that well,

but he's right.

I'm her houseguest, Felix.

I'm trying not to piss her off.

No, what you are is New Lisbeth.

No, I am not.

If I were New Lisbeth,
would I be helping Lauren

hold New Lisbeth auditions next week?

Yes.

That's exactly what
New Lisbeth would do.

Liam, the ice!

(DRAMATIC MUSIC)

♪

Hey, I feel like I haven't
seen you in forever.

It's been, like, an hour.

Yeah, but still.

I mean, it sucks that they split us up.

Yeah, but they were right
that it wasn't fair of us

to be on the same team together.

We would have kicked their asses.

We're totally unbeatable!

We are, aren't we?

Peace offering?

We got off on the wrong foot, Shane.

I want to apologize.

You can try.

I needed that prize money,

and I manipulated you to get it.

Whether or not you want me in the band,

I'm just glad I get the chance

to tell you how truly sorry I am.

That's a...

That's a good apology.

It's one of my many talents.

Okay, enough groveling.

I've given it some thought,
and I forgive you.

You're in the band.

Wow, that's great.

But I've also given it some thought,

and I don't think your band
is the right fit for me.

Thanks for the offer, though.

(TIMER RINGING)

Okay, okay.

Back on the clock, everyone.

Uh-oh, we got a spy from Team Two.

But the game hasn't even started yet.

Yeah, good catch!

Karma, another infraction.

Yeesh, again?

Man, Lauren really has it out for you.

Yeah, it's starting to seem that way.

You guys saw that, right?

Your second infraction, yep.

Yeah, we already have one person

playing for the other team.

We don't need two.

Maybe you guys didn't notice it,

but I'm pretty sure Sabrina is using

Lauren's game night to bring me down.

Is she serious?

Sadly, yes.

Sabrina seems cool.

Me and her are thinking about

starting a graphic novel book club.

Wow, I would like to join that.

- Yeah?
- Yeah, totally.

Sabrina, it's your turn!

- Get it, girl!
- Whoo!

- Yes!
- All right.

Ow!

(UPBEAT ROCK MUSIC)

(IMITATING LIGHT SABER)

Uh, uh, vibrator!

- Uh...
- "Star Wars."

Yep!

I got six points.

That means Team Two is coming back.

Whoo-hoo!

Except, well, I'm sorry to say,

but you made light saber noises,

and like, the only rule
of charades is no noise.

I didn't make noise, did I?

- I didn't hear anything.
- Who cares?

Yeah, you did.

That counts as your third infraction,

which means you're disqualified.

Disqualified? From game night?

I'm Team Let's End Game Night.

Sorry, Karm.

Didn't mean to make this, like, a thing.

You never do, do you, Sabs?

I mean, this is just like
camp all over again.

Camp? I'm sorry Karma.

I don't know what you're talking about.

Of course you don't.

Karma, why are you flipping out?

I'm flipping out because
Sabrina has been

out to get me all night.

Why can't any of you see that?

We need to talk now.

It's okay, we can keep
going without them.

Liam, go get the Twister mat.

No.

I'm not gonna get the Twister mat,

because I think it's unfair
that you disqualified Karma.

Oh, please.

Don't let your penis make
game decisions for you.

- Ooh!
- Burn.

You know what?

That's it. I'm moving out.

I don't want to be here if
it means being your slave.

Or as you call it, Lisbeth.

You said helping is fun for you.

Yeah, because I didn't
want to piss you off.

The same reason I've
been letting you win.

I don't need anyone to let me win.

Prove it.

This time we'll play you against me.

No holding back.

Fine!

- Game on, Booker.
- Game on.

How could you do that?

Sabrina just moved here, and
she's trying to fit in.

This is exactly what she wants,

to turn us against each other.

Look, behind your back,

Sabrina is a totally different person.

She hates me,

and she wants you all to herself.

That's ridiculous!

And why am I only
hearing about this now?

Because I was 12 and insecure,

and I was worried you were
gonna believe her over me,

which is exactly what is happening here.

Okay, Karma, I love you,

but do you realize how
crazy jealous you sound?

Sabrina is not some evil mastermind.

She's just a person.

Who wants to take you away from me.

And maybe I'm a little jealous.

Do you really think
that after everything

that we've been through,
anybody could come between us?

Honestly?

Yeah.

We were broken, Amy,

and then my dad had his heart attack,

and we were just back.

What if we didn't fix anything?

Look, your dad's heart attack

wasn't just some Band-Aid.

It showed us that no matter
what happens between us,

we will always be there for each other.

Nothing and nobody can come between us,

including Sabrina.

You're right.

Thanks for the reminder.

But I do like her,

and I really want to be her friend,

so you need to make nice.

I can do that.

Okay.

I know your game, buddy.

I'm sorry?

Yeah, I'm supposed to
ask why you don't want

to be in my band, and then you
tell me everything wrong,

and then I beg you to
help me fix it, right?

So, go ahead.

Why don't you want to be in my band?

Well, man, I really
wasn't prepared for this,

but since you asked, I guess I'd say,

well, I hate the name.

And if I'm being honest,

your sound is a little
cliché and derivative.

Oh, you want to hear something
cliché and derivative?

Go (BLEEP) yourself!

Hey, Sabrina.

Uh, I wanted to apologize.

I thought I'd moved on,
but being with you

brought up some old memories from camp.

You know, when you bullied
me behind Amy's back.

But that was a million years ago,

and I forgive you,

so I hope we can be friends,
for real this time.

I bullied you?

Do you know what that
summer was like for me?

When I met Amy, I thought I had

finally found a best friend,

but she already had one.

You.

Nights in bunk five

were the only time I had Amy to myself.

(BOTH LAUGHING)

But then you started
showing up there too.

(SCREAMS)

I had to do something.

Ow!

So I called night duty,

that way I could have Amy all to myself.

I knew it was you!

I had to peel potatoes for a month!

And I bet you're gonna tell Amy,

try to turn her against me?

No.

I'm not 12 anymore, Sabrina.

I can handle Amy having another friend,

because I know no one will ever
have the connection we do.

You're right.

I'll never connect with
Amy the same way you do.

But that doesn't mean you
two can't be friends.

So why don't you and I call a truce,

for Amy's sake?

Truce.

I'm pretty sure "go (BLEEP) yourself"

means we're done talking.

Listen, I want to apologize

for real this time.

I was just messing with you.

I don't think you or your band

are cliché and derivative at all.

You're great.

Then why do you keep messing with me?

Because sometimes when I like someone,

my attempts at flirting
can come off as, well,

being a dick.

Wait, you like me?

You really need to work on your signals.

How does this read to you?

♪ Ain't nothing but you and me ♪

♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪

Wait, so are you in the band or not?

I may need more convincing.

♪ Take, take, take ♪

♪ We keep the lights out ♪

Three eights.

Full house.

Ugh!

All right, all right.

Looks like I'll be sleeping
in my car tonight,

but the important thing
is that we all know

that I am not New Lisbeth.

(GROANS)

Wait. Stop.

You don't have to leave.

Maybe I should, 'cause I'm pretty sure

I'm gonna piss you off again soon.

I'm pretty sure you will,

but I won't kick you out because of it,

because it's not horrible
having you around.

Don't make a (BLEEP) thing out of it.

(LAUGHS)

Okay, if you insist.

But you should know
that tonight was fun.

Sorry tonight was crazy.

I'm cool with crazy.

But there is something that I
wanted to talk to you about,

if that's okay with you.

You can talk to me about anything.

Earlier when you said
that you liked girls,

it hit me.

I've been having these dreams lately,

and I've always thought
that I was straight,

but now I'm starting to
think that maybe I'm not.

What about your boyfriend?

Made him up.

Typical questioning girl cliché, right?

Wow.

Thank you, for trusting
me enough to tell me.

I know how scary it is to open up.

I would appreciate it if you didn't

tell anyone while I still
try to figure things out.

I know you and Karma tell
each other everything.

No, no, I won't tell Karma.

Or anyone.

This is between you and me.

I'm here for you.

I knew you would be.

(UPBEAT MUSIC)