Dwight in Shining Armor (2018–2021): Season 5, Episode 7 - Flashback - full transcript

Macklyn helps Dwight, Gretta, and Baldric find ingredients for a counter spell to stop the memory thief and pledges to bring reinforcements to aid in the fight. Dwight and Gretta are forced to confront their past together. Hexela returns with news about the stone soldiers and who is trying to bring them back.

Dwight: Previously
on Dwight in Shining Armor.

[thunk]

Macklynn?

Maybe you don't remember
your childhood, your wedding day

or the day
you were in the woods

because the memory thief
was there at all those times.

We know
who the memory thief is.

Baldric: Mr. Hammond.

- So, we're doing this again,
are we?

Thanks so much for coming by.

Dwight: I think
we need to change our strategy.



Gretta: We need
professional help.

He said there was a way
to steal our memories back,

when we knew the answer
to this question.

Dwight: Who's supposed
to read this?

- Who is the memory thief?

- Hm.

- We must see the Contrarian.

- [sad] Oh.



Baldric: Ah.

Good day, sir.

So glad we caught you.

- Office hours end
at five of the clock.

Baldric: But this is
most urgent.



- If your face
was on backwards,

that would be urgent.

Dwight: Yes, yes, yes, it would.

Contrarian: You may call
my assistant

for an appointment tomorrow.

Gretta: Tomorrow might be
too late.

- Not for me.

Dwight: We're all here now.

Can't we just get this thing
over with?

Contrarian: I have to draw
clear boundaries

and make time for myself
or all I do is work

at expense
of my work/life balance.

- [to herself] Balance?

- You know what?

You're right.

You're right.

You gotta take care
of yourself

before you take care
of other people.

I get that.

Gretta: What?

Baldric: But Sir Dwight.

Dwight: But we can't just
make our crisis, his crisis.

- We know
who the memory thief is.

[intense music]

- Who?

Gretta: Mr. Hammond.

Dwight: Our history teacher,
you know,

we'll tell you all about it
tomorrow.

- Tomorrow may be too late.

Baldric/Gretta: Ah, ah.

Contrarian: Where is
the memory thief now?

Dwight: Woodside High.

Contrarian: You could confront
and capture him there.

Baldric: Yes, yes,
that's what I said.

Contrarian: But only a fool
would attempt that.

- [annoyed sound]

Contrarian: He would simply
rob your memories yet again.

Gretta: [disgusted sound]

Contrarian: You need
a forget-me-not.

- A what?

- A flower.

Looks like this.

It can be found in the woods
growing in dappled sunlight

on the northern bank
of the sulfur spring.

Baldric: Yes, I know the place.

- You think you do.

- I do, I know, I know it.

- There's the big sulfur spring
which everyone knows of--

- Yes.

Contrarian: and then
there's the little sulfur spring

a good forty paces on.

Baldric: Oh.

Contrarian: That's the one.

Dwight: Okay,
little sulfur spring,

got it.

- Ah.

Contrarian: See that you pick
the forget-me-nots

before sunset
or they lose their potency.

Gretta: Potency.

Contrarian: When you have
the forget-me-nots in hand,

follow these instructions
to steal your memories back.

Dwight: Okay, so
about a thousand years ago

there was this princess, Gretta,
and she was in big trouble

'cause she had lots of enemies
and not a lot of friends.

So, her court magician, Baldric
cast the champion spell.

It put everyone in the woods
to sleep

until a champion would come,

break the spell with his kiss

and deal with
Gretta's big, scary enemies.

But that guy never showed up.

Ah!

Instead,

[kiss]

they got me.

Ah!



Ow!





Gretta: Oof.

Baldric: Oh.

Dwight: Is this
the big sulfur pool

or the little sulfur pool.

Macklynn: Ho there!

Dwight: Macklynn the Fox.

Gretta: Uncle Henrik.

Macklynn: Well met, Highness.

Baldric.

Sir Dwight.

Gretta: What news
from your journey?

Did you find Aunt Ermingarde?

- I did.

Our search for the memory thief
yielded but one small clue.

See here.

This was painted
on our wedding day.

Eall these years.t

You recognize me,
of course and Ermingarde.

Baldric: Oh,
and there's the king.

- My father.

Baldric: And the queen.

- My mother.

Macklynn: But, who's that?

He wears the crest
of the House of Moondragon

but nobody seems
to remember him.

Gretta: That's--

Dwight: Mr. Hammond.

Macklynn: You know him?

Dwight: Our history teacher,
but, not really.

Gretta: He is
the memory thief.

- Come, we will confront
and capture the villain.

Dwight: No, we won't.

Gretta: We've tried that.

Dwight: But he just keeps
stealing our memories.

Baldric: We need
forget-me-not flowers.

They grow
by the little sulfur pool.

- Ha!

[snap]

Follow me.

Gretta: Ah.

Baldric: Oh.



Baldric: Huzzah.

The forget-me-nots.

Dwight: Okay,
32 minutes to sundown.

Get to picking people.

- [sighs]

- Okay, now what?

Baldric: Uh, hm.

Immediately smell
the forget-me-nots.

Dwight: Oh.

Baldric: Halt!

Do not immediately
smell the forget-me-nots.

Oh, sorry.

Let me see
if I can make this out.

- Ugh,

a pox on that Contrarian
and his impossible handwriting.

Dwight: Yep.

Baldric: First find
the partridge

you wish to remember.

- Partridge?

Baldric: [mumbles]

Macklynn: A, the person
you wish to remember.

Baldric: Oh!

Gretta: Ah.

Baldric: Ha, ha.

Yes, yes.

That's a relief.

- Keep this person
in sour tights.

- Ew.

Gretta: What?

No.

Let me see that.

Keep this person
in your sight.

All: Ah.

Macklynn: Right you are.

Baldric: Yes.

Gretta: Then smell
the forget-me-nots.

Baldric: Mm.

Gretta: Every memory you have
of this partridge--

- Person.

- shall come back to you,
and stay with you forever.

- Oh.

Gretta: A thoroughly
achievable plan.

Baldric: Yes.

I should go pick a few more
for good measure

before the sun sets.

Gretta: Ah.

Dwight: Okay, so talk me
through this again.

Gretta: We find Mr. Hammond.

Macklynn: We keep him
in our sights,

not in sour tights.

- Mm.

Gretta: We smell
the forget-me-nots.

Macklynn: While looking at him.

Gretta: And every memory
we have of him shall return.

Dwight: Oh.

Macklynn: And stay with us
forever.

[footsteps]

Hexela: Baldric?

Baldric!

Baldric: Hexela!

[joyful noises]

[lots of kissing]

Baldric: Oh, my sweet,

sweet,

darling.

Hexela: My dearest.

I was looking everywhere
for you.

[lots of kissing]

Baldric: Hexie.

Hexela: Baldie-boo, Baldie-boo.

Baldric: [giggling]

Hexie! Hexie!

Turn around!

Hexela: [screams]

Baldric: Ha.

Ah, ha, ha.

Highness, look who I've,

is in the woods here,

in this wooded area
we're in.

Hexela: Hm?

Oh?

Well, well.

Hail...fellows.

Baldric: Hail.

- Hello.

Dwight: So, uh,
how was your trip?

Hexela: My trip.

My trip?

Baldric: Oh!
Did you find what you sought?

Hexela: I did!

Baldric: Oh!

Hexela: I know
who cast the liven spell

on the stone soldiers.

It was her, Baldric.

[tapping]

[explosion]

- Ragana.

- Oh.

Demon: Ragana, Ragana, Ragana!

[laughter]

[skitter]

- [sniffs deeply]

[sighs]

Hello, my sweet.

Let's get started.

Dwight: See,
it's like 8 o'clock.

Everybody's gone
but the boy's volleyball team

in the gym.

Gretta: Where else
would the teacher be

but his schoolhouse?

Dwight: What, you think
teachers actually live here

at school?

- [groans]

Let's do the quick version.

I'm in a hurry.

Macklynn: 'Tis he.

- Yes, hi.

I'm the memory thief.

Good job.

You got me.

Again.

Ragana: You work
at a peasant school?

Hexela: Ragana.

- Oh, Hexie.

Mr. Hammond: You two
know each other?

Ragana: Oh, yes.

Hexela is one of my dearest
and oldest friends,

isn't that right?

- Oh, indeed.

What times we've had.

Both: [cackle loudly]

[yell]

[explosions]

[yells]

Baldric: [gasps]

Hexela: Oh.

Baldric: Ha!

Now you're stuck,
you pair of rascals!

- Do something!

Ragana: Don't tell me
what to do!

Hexela--

- [grunt]

Ragana: Where on earth

did you learn
a magnet maker spell?

Hexela: From an old boyfriend.

[giggles]

Baldric: [laughs then stops]

Hexela: [clears throat]

Everyone comfy?

Let's have a chat.

I'm madly curious, love.

How did you do it?

Ragana: Hexela,
why, what on earth

are you talking about?

- A liven spell is
a powerful thing

and terribly expensive.

It usually costs the life
of a witch,

[gasp]

and yet here you are,
alive and squirming.

Ragana: Hexela,
you're such a rule follower!

Yes, I cast the liven spell,

and yes, it cost the life
of a witch.

Do you remember
our dear, old friend, Yetza?

She did beautifully.

[cackles]

Hexela: [gasps]

You used Yetza,

a sister witch
from our own coven for a spell?

- Hexie, you are such
a stuffy, little goodie-goodie.

[laughs]

Macklynn: Quickly,
the forget-me-nots.

- Oh, right, yep.

- [frustrated huff]

Dwight: Everybody takes a whiff,
just stare 'em down and

[sniffs]



[music stops]

Gretta: Uh.

Well?

Dwight: Huh? What?

- What do you remember?

- [stammering]

Not, not, not much.

Macklynn: Let me try.



- Hammond?

Gretta: What do you remember?

Macklynn: This is Hammond.

The king's brother.

And your uncle.

We were friends as boys.

We were inseparable,

until your father
became king.

Then Hammond changed.

He was angry, jealous...

[agitated breathing]

Sweet heaven, it was you,
Hammond.

Gretta: What?

Hammond sold the king
to the fairies.

- Don't just lie there,
get us off this floor.

- [growls]

Macklynn: I learned
what he had done

and set out to warn the queen.

[distant sounds of fighting]

Macklynn: But Hammond met me
in the woods.

How could you do it, Hammond?

To your own brother?

- He's the one
who got on the bad side

of the fairies.

- What could
they possibly give you

that was worth his blood?

- [growls]

[metal on metal]

[clank]

I gave him the king,

and they gave me the power
to be ruler of Rogemore.

- What power?

Mr. Hammond: I'm still
kinda getting the knack of it,

but it works like this.

Hail!

Henrik!

What brings you
into the wood this day?

- Hammond!

Ah, well met!

I am on a mission
of great import

to warn the queen.

- Indeed?

Of what danger?

- To-- Uh, forgive me.

I haven't slept in two days, uh.

I must warn the queen
that, that.

Mr. Hammond: [laughing]

See! It's quite a bit of fun.

- Why do you wear
the king's ring?

- Because it suits me
far better than him.

- What have you done?

Mr. Hammond: I sold the king
to the fairies,

and they made me
a memory thief.

- Why have you told me this?

- Why not?

You won't remember.

- I awoke in the woods
with no memory of my life.

[emotional] You took everything.

- Just take a minute,
buddy, okay?

Ragana: [bored sigh]

- Who's next?

- [sniff]

[poignant melody]

Mr. Hammond: [distant voice]
You're the only magician

in history to have ever built
a scrying pool.

Surely, you remember how.

- I remember...

how to build a scrying pool.

- No. Baldric!

Gretta: But you said
it could never be done.

- It can be done,
and I have done it.

- What's a scrying pool?

Baldric: It's a pool of water
like any other,

except this one allows a person
to travel through time.

- Oh, so just a pool of water
totally not like any other.

Baldric: It is
expressly forbidden

for any magician to even attempt
to build a scrying pool.

The consequences
could be utter chaos.

Hexela: Baldric.

You, of all magicians.

Why?

- Because...

he killed...

Princess Gretta.

Woman: Gretta!

[sobbing]

Baldric: 'Twas poisoned.

The work of someone
within the castle.

But we never suspected
it was him.

[bells tolling]

Baldric: Majesty.

You are not safe here.

- I won't leave her.

Baldric: Whoever killed
the princess

will want you dead next.

You staying here,

it will not undo
what has been done.

- Then what will?

Baldric, you are
the greatest magician

of our time.

You must know a way.

There must be a way
to bring her back to me.

- There is a way.

It is forbidden.

Full of peril.

There will be consequences.

- Yes!

Whatever it is.

- It will alter the past
in ways we cannot predict.

- [shuddering sigh]

So be it.

Bring her back to me.

- I will try.

[intense music]

- I am coming, Princess.

[deep breath]

[small splash]

[rising magic]

[small explosion]

Queen: ♪ And they all
ate him up, yum, yum, yum. ♪

no more, no more. ♪

♪ And they all ate him up. ♪

[magical pulse]

Baldric: [distant voice]
I am coming, Princess.

Queen: ♪ And they all
ate him up, yum, yum, yum. ♪

♪ And the boar was
no more, no more. ♪

♪ And they all ate him up,
yum, yum, yum. ♪

- Princess.

[gasp]

Queen: What's amiss, Baldric?

- Majesty,
I have come at your command

to change
what is to happen today.

Queen: I don't understand.

- We must run.

Now!

Quick!

[intense music]

[intense music]

[rumbling]

[thump]

[intense music]





Baldric: [whisper] Quickly.

Your Majesty.

[crunching leaves]

- Get down!

[magical explosion]

Baldric: Ah!

Yah.

[groaning]

Ragana?

Ragana: Hello there, darling,

it's been ages.

And you're still
as handsome as ever.

Don't move!

- What are you doing here?

Mr. Hammond: She's with me.

- I should have known.

Mr. Hammond: You did.

Several times.

You just don't remember.

Baldric: You did this!

It was you!

All this time it was YOU!

Mr. Hammond: Ragana!

Do something, now!

- Don't boss me!

I do what I like when I like!

- Baldric, what happened?

- [whisper] Sir Dwight.

- [sniffs]

[sniff]

[emotional] Uncle Hammond.

- Hello, sweetheart.

- Rashtala!

[explosion]

Mr. Hammond: Get the girl!

Ragana: To the sky!

Baldric: Princess!

- You tried to kill a child?!

- I did not try to kill a child.

I tried to turn her
into an oak tree.

[cackles]



Gretta: My mother shielded me.

Baldric: [distant] Princess!

Rasha!

Gretta: And Baldric cast
a spell of his own.

[explosion]

- It was supposed
to save you.

Make you invincible.

[explosion]

Both spells struck the queen
at once.

Queen: GRETTA!

Baldric: Both took effect.





Dwight: [tenderly] So your mom
became a tree.

Hexela: That is invincible.

- [furious yell]

Ragana: [scream]

Run!

Baldric: [yell]

[explosion]

Little Gretta: Baldric!

- Majesty!

Princess!

[grunting]

Gretta.

[grunting]

Mr. Hammond: [grunting]

Ragana: I'm no match for him
without my staff.

Mr. Hammond: Wait!

Baldric! Gretta!

[magical explosion]

Gretta: [furious sounds]

Dwight: Gretta, Gretta, Gretta.

Hey.

Mr. Hammond: Ragana!

Ragana: What do we say, Hammond?

Mr. Hammond: [growls]

Ragana, please.

Ragana: [inhales]

[yells and snaps]

Hexela: No, you don't!

Dwight: Ah!

[magical explosion]

Dwight: Ow!

Hey!

Baldric: I fear we have not seen
the last of them.

- No,
Hammond will never stop.

Will never yield until he is
the ruler of Rogemore.

Hexela: And with Ragana
at his side.

Gretta: We are no match
for him.

- I will away at once,
to bring allies to our cause.

Courage, Princess.

You are the ruler
of Rogemore.

Like your mother and father
before.

We will not fail you.

[courageous music]