Designing Women (1986–1993): Season 4, Episode 6 - The Rowdy Girls - full transcript

♪♪

Oh, I give up. This is too hard.

What are you doing?

I'm trying to fill out this
medical questionnaire.

You know, Dr. Frederick,
my gynecologist, retired,

so he referred me
to this new doctor

whose receptionist gave
me this form to fill out

and return on my next visit.

And, I mean, it's
too much trouble!

I mean, I just want a Pap Smear.

I don't know why
they have to know



whether or not I have
insanity in my family.

Yeah, I hate that, too.

I always write "You bet."

Oh, here's another
one. Listen to this.

"When did you first experience
the onset of menses?"

The onset of menses?
Can you believe that?

I mean, I'm 34 years old.

Like I'm gonna go "Oh,
yeah, it was the 3rd of June,

another sleepy dusty Delta day."

I'm sorry, Anthony.

We just kind of think of
you as one of the girls.

Hey, I understand.

Hey, speaking
of forms to fill out,

what do y'all want me to do
with this talent show application?



What application?

Julia, it's the Decorative
Arts Center Talent Show.

Rita Scott has been
calling me for three days.

She wants to know
if we're gonna be in it.

That's because they always win.

They just want to humiliate us.

You know, Mary Jo, that
kind of hurts my feelings.

I thought I did pretty
good on "Lila Marlene."

Oh, you did! You did!

I mean, at least you kept within
the theme of World War II songs.

I'll tell you what hurt us...

Suzanne and that
damned fire baton.

That baton was dumb.

It had nothing to
do with the war!

Mary Jo, Suzanne twirls
because she can't sing.

I say, let's just not be in it.

Well, Julia, I mean, Rita
and Betty and Ladawn

don't sing, either.
They just lip synch.

Anyway, we'd be the
only firm not participating.

It's for a good cause.

I mean, they raised
$55,000 last year

for Children's Hospital.

I never will forget
this talent show

that we had when
I was in prison.

They needed about 10 inmates
to play different celebrities,

but for some reason, almost all of
these guys wanted to be Dolly Parton.

I remember this one guy
with the whole nine yards.

He had mattress
stuffing out to here.

His friends had to carry him
horizontal out to recreation,

which was just
before the tryouts.

Well, for some reason, all the
Dollys got into this great big fight.

I mean, it was horrible.

People got strangled
with giant pieces of elastic.

They called that the
great brassiere war.

Actually, they called
it something else.

But you probably don't
want to know about that.

I'm sorry. You said I
was one of the girls.

I just cannot believe
that this is the sort of thing

y'all sit around talking
about when I'm not here.

Actually, we were
trying to figure out

what to do in this
year's talent show.

Oh, don't bother yourselves.

I have the perfect idea.

We are not doing another
number around your fire baton.

That baton is dumb.

It's the kind of thing
archeologists will dig up

in a thousand years and go

"What the hell
was this thing for?"

If you don't mind me
making a suggestion,

y'all should do
something from Motown.

They have the best songs
for dancing and lip synching.

Yes! Oh, Anthony,
that's a fantastic idea!

We could be the
Supremes! It's perfect!

I'll get Mrs. Caldwell
to make the costumes.

You know, my cousin Mavis,
she lives here in Atlanta now.

She used to teach dance.
She could choreograph it for us.

You know, you remember Mavis.

Oh, yeah, she's
great, she's great!

Oh, Julia, will you do it?

I don't know, Mary Jo.
I'd just as soon bow out.

Anyway, weren't there
only three Supremes?

Well, that doesn't matter.

We can take license with that.

Oh, sure, that's believable.

Four white women,
one of them's pregnant,

but we're the Supremes.

Oh, Suzanne, come
on. It's just for fun.

Now, now, excuse me, but if
we're going to be black people,

I would rather be
those ones that sang

that "Midnight Train to
Georgia" song, you know,

Gladys Knight and the Pimps.

Gladys Knight and the Pimps?

Suzanne, that's what
you think their name is?

I don't know, Charlene.

I don't listen to
the radio that much.

Suzanne, it's the Pips,
not the Pimps, okay?

All right, Julia, I'm going
to the phone to call Mavis.

Are you in, or are you out?

All right, I'll do it
on one condition,

that this dance routine be
done with taste and dignity.

Tramp.

- What you call me?
- Tramp.

- You don't wear continental clothes...
- Okay, darlings,

I want you to lift
those little tushies!

Come on, get the lead out!

Get your thighs up, thighs up!

Oh, that's good!

And remember, wrists high!

Keep those wrists
high, and keep going

because I gave you
a 10-minute break.

It ain't over until it's over!

And stop!

Ha!

You guys are doing really
good for just a week's work.

Mavis, I hate to complain,
but you're killing us.

Charlene, are you sure
this is not too much for you?

No, no. I asked my obstetrician.

She said it'd be good for me.

Unfortunately, Mavis and
I go to the same doctor.

Mavis, how'd you
hurt your wrist?

Oh, Dan and I were playing
tennis, and I fell down.

Can you believe it?

Oh, I can't wait till
y'all meet her husband.

Every single girl in
Poplar Bluff High School

wanted to marry Dan Madling,
but he was in love with Mavis.

Mama, I fixed y'all some Cokes.

Oh, sweetheart!

Oh.

Did you say hello to Charlene?

And the two Miss
Sugarbakers and Mrs. Shivley.

Hi.

You cupcake, come
here. Give me a big hug.

You are getting so big.

So are you.

Oh, boy, she's
definitely your daughter.

Well, I try to be a bad
influence whenever possible.

Honey, I want you to
do a favor for me, okay?

Go up and tell your
sisters to get ready for bed.

Now go on, get. I love you.

I love you, too.

Okay.

Mavis, I can't get over how
much she reminds me of you.

Oh, I know.

Well, we were just
like she was at that age.

Really, I mean,
don't you remember?

- The rowdy girls!
- Yeah.

We used to run around
like maniacs at recess.

Miss Barnes hated us
'cause we weren't ladylike.

And one day, she asked
Mavis why we were so rowdy,

and Mavis said, "I
don't know, Miss Barnes.

"We just run and run till
we fall down and bleed,

"but we don't care 'cause
we're the rowdy girls.

We'll never be the
stand-around girls."

You know the girls who
stand around and say

"No, thank you. I might
get my dress dirty."

I'm so glad y'all
came over tonight.

I've been so homesick,

and it's just too sad to
go back to Poplar Bluff,

now that Mama and Daddy died.

Hey, what's going on in here?

You girls sitting around
talking about us men?

Hi, honey.

You flatter yourself. Get
over here, Dan Madling.

I tell you, you get better-looking
every time I see you.

In fact, if that baby's
cuter than ours,

we're gonna get mad.

We may even demand a trade, huh?

That's terrible.

Okay, I want you to
meet my dearest friends.

This is Mary Jo Shivley,

and Julia and
Suzanne Sugarbaker.

- Nice to meet you.
- How do you do?

You know, Charlene,
this hurts us deeply.

I mean, we thought we
were your dearest friends.

Well, I don't count
relatives as friends.

Oh, that's very wise, huh?

I say we'd better
get out of here.

I didn't realize how
late it was getting.

Oh, okay.

Yeah, I've gotta go home,
too, put my little ones to bed.

Well, remember tomorrow
night, same time, same place.

Okay.

Bye-bye.

- Oh.
- Boy, was he cute.

How come you never
brought him by before?

Suzanne, they haven't
even lived here a year yet.

Yeah, anyway, what do you care?

It sounds like
you're coveting him.

Coveting?

What kind of talk is that?

Is that like Shakespeare
or something?

Never mind. Let's go.

Wait, wait, wait. I
forgot my gym bag.

Oh, no, go ahead. I'll
be with you in a minute.

All right, we'll just be
warming up the car!

I told you it's just
for this one week.

I don't give a damn
if it's for one minute!

I come first! When I come home,
I expect dinner to be on the table!

Do you understand?

It's right here in the oven.

What difference does it make?

You cooked it at 6:00!

It's garbage now!
I don't want it!

Do you want to see
how much I want it!

This is how much I want it!

Do you want to see some more?

Do you want to see some more?

Dan, please,
don't do this again!

You're hurting me!

Please, I said I'd fix
you something else.

I don't want anything else!

Now you get down
there and clean it up!

And when you're finished,
there's only person around here

who's going to eat that
slop, and that's you, Mavis!

Do you hear me?

- Yes.
- Do you? Do you?

Charlene, I know you're
still upset about Mavis.

Why don't you just go on home?

No, I feel so helpless, like I
should've tried to do something.

It all makes sense now.

You know, the twisted
wrist was from playing tennis,

and a couple of months ago,

she had a broken finger that
she slammed in the car door.

And when they first moved
here, she had a busted ear drum,

which, of course,
she got scuba diving.

You know, I notice he's
always in perfect health.

Mavis is such a bright,
intelligent woman.

I don't get it. Why would
she put up with this?

It happens all the time.

I know.

I tape Oprah, too.

What is it?

Something like every 15 seconds,

a woman gets beaten
up in her own home?

I mean, think about it.

That's like four
women every minute.

I mean, you know,
just since we started

having this conversation
a few minutes ago,

like a dozen women
have been beaten up

and/or sexually abused
by, quote, a loved one.

You know what gets me
even worse is half the time,

the children are abused, too.

I swear on my own life, if
somebody was beating me up

or my children, I'd
leave. I'd get out.

I don't care if we
had to dig ditches

and eat out of trash cans.

Well, Julia, you're a lot
stronger than most people.

You know, it's not that simple.

I know it's not simple, Mary Jo,

but for me, the
bottom line would be

if you're going to have to
live with somebody like that,

what's the point of being alive?

If you could've heard
how he was talking to her...

You know, in some ways, Mavis is more
like a sister to me than my own sisters,

you know, 'cause
we're the same age,

and she was the one
I told all my secrets to.

You know, if something bad
happened to me, you know,

she'd cry harder than I did.

That's what hurts the
most is last night, you know,

he wasn't just hitting her.
He was humiliating her.

Mavis, what are you doing here?

Well, I wanted to return
your Motown tapes.

I'm so sorry, but I can't have
y'all over for rehearsal tonight.

Julie and Katie
both have the flu.

Anyway, you've outgrown me.

Charlene, what's wrong?

Nothing.

Hi.

We just heard about a
friend who's in a lot of trouble.

Oh, I'm sorry.

Is there anything I can do?

Maybe.

You could start by
taking off your glasses.

What?

I know what's going on, Mavis.

I heard him last night.

Please don't be
embarrassed. I love you.

Oh, Mavis!

Charlene, maybe Mary
Jo and I should just go.

No, no, that's okay.

I want you to stay.

I mean, you're all
my friends now, too.

In fact, you're the
first real friends

I've had in a long time.

I'd forgotten what it felt like.

I mean, the girls and I don't
usually have people over,

because we never really know

what the situation's
going to be.

Mavis, how long's
he been like this?

Always.

- Even in high school?
- Oh, yeah.

He used to hit me back
then, but it was just bruises.

It's gotten much worse, but
he's always sorry afterwards,

and he buys me
gifts, and he cries,

and he begs my forgiveness.

And you take him back.

I love him.

Mavis, aren't you
worried about the baby?

Oh, he never hits me there.

Oh, Mavis!

Well, what about the girls?

No, no, it's just me.

But they must
know. They have to!

Mavis, you, of all
people, I don't understand

how you could put up with this.

I am not like those women
that I see on those talk shows,

who say they thought
they used to deserve it.

I never thought I deserved it.

I just haven't
known how to stop it.

Mavis, I have to tell you,

I've never heard of
one of those situations

that got better by itself.

They only get worse,
and it seems to me that,

often, the women
have confused love

with security and familiarity.

Oh, I know that.

I'm 35 years old.

I have a beautiful home,
a successful husband,

and a billfold full
of credit cards,

none of which have
my name on them.

So I gave all that up,

knowing that I don't even
have $100 to call my own.

And I take myself, I take
my two years of college

and my three kids and
little Mavis the 4th here,

and I step out into what?

Into life, freedom.

Mavis, I know you.
You could do anything.

I mean, start a dance school.

That's always been your dream.

Charlene, I can't believe
you even remember that.

I don't have that kind
of confidence anymore.

There's something sad
about an old dream, isn't there?

Well, it's change of plans.

Some judge fell out of this
beauty contest in Natchez,

so now I've gotta fly out there,

but it'll be finished
tomorrow afternoon.

I'm taking my dress with me,
and so I can just meet y'all,

you know, at the talent
show tomorrow night.

Anyway, I know my Supremes song,

and Anthony and I have
been practicing all morning.

Excuse me.

Exactly what song are
you and Anthony doing?

Julia, you don't
know black music.

You wouldn't know it.

Oh, that reminds me.

I went down to
the beauty supply,

and I asked them to mix
up some real dark body

and facial makeup
for us, you know,

so we could be more authentic.

Suzanne, let me
get this straight.

You think we're gonna
do that song in blackface?

Well, I don't know
what you call it, Julia,

but, I mean, if we're
going to be the Supremes,

I think we should certainly
try and look like 'em.

Suzanne, we can't
go around in blackface.

- That's racist!
- Why?

If Dustin Hoffman was going
to play Martin Luther King,

you don't think he'd
wear black makeup?

Suzanne, Dustin Hoffman would
never play Martin Luther King!

That part would
go to a black actor!

Well, I think that's racist!

I mean, I think it should go
to whoever the best person is,

and that could be
Dustin Hoffman.

Suzanne, I don't
care what you think,

we are not going to wear that.

Anthony, please
explain this to her.

Well, I've tried, but, actually,
she does have a point.

I mean, she is not
talking about Al Jolson

with a big white circle
drawn around his mouth.

She's talking about theatrical
makeup like Eddie Murphy wore

when he played that white
guy on Saturday Night Live,

or Sir Laurence Olivier wore dark
makeup when he played Othello.

Okay, we're just gonna
settle this right now.

I'm going to call up the local
chapter of the NAACP and ask them.

So, Anthony, you
think it's all right

to go around in blackface?

Oh, I don't know, Mary
Jo. It's very complicated.

I certainly don't
think one should do it

while one is tap dancing
and eating watermelon.

Charlene?

Hi.

I was just on my way
to the talent show.

- Is it okay?
- Well, sure.

The kids are upstairs,
and Dan's still at work.

Mavis, I've been too
upset since the other night.

I just can't stop
thinking about you.

Yeah, I've been thinking
about our whole family,

how much I miss Mama and Daddy.

They wouldn't want
you to live this way.

You know, it's funny, but I haven't
really felt alive in a long time,

and I've forgotten
what I used to be like.

But every once in a while,

there's this little voice
inside me that says

"Hey, it's me. It's
Mavis. I'm still in here."

But, basically, I've been dead.

And then two things happened...

This baby and seeing you again.

Then all you have to do is
get Jenny, Julie, and Kate,

and come with me now.

After the show,
we'll go to my house.

You could all stay
with Bill and me

until we can find
you an apartment.

Oh, I can't afford to leave.

Mavis, you can't afford not to.

Now, there are places
you can go for help,

but first we have to
get you out of here!

I get an allowance.

I don't have any money
to move into an apartment!

Well, you do now.
This is from Bill and me,

and the other check
is from the rest of us,

for helping us rehearse.

Oh, Charlene, this is too much.

I mean, how could they do this?

They don't even know me!

It's just the way they are.

That's why they're my friends.

That $50 is from Anthony.

I don't... I don't
know what to say.

Just say you'll do it.

Now, Mavis, I have to go.

Now, if you won't
come with me right now,

I will be at the Arts
Center until 11:00.

Just get your girls and come.

Just take this first step.

I will be by your
side the whole way.

I'm so ashamed!

I don't know how I ever
let it get to this point!

It's okay, it's okay.

Just remember, we
don't have to take this,

'cause we're the rowdy girls.

Remember?

Yeah, I remember.

♪ You shake my nerves
and you rattle my brain ♪

♪ Thinking about your
love drive a man insane ♪

I knew Suzanne would be late.

I should've never have
let her go to Natchez.

We'll just have to
do it without her.

There's only supposed to
be three Supremes anyway.

Well, in the meantime,

how am I supposed
to lip synch a duet?

Just be glad she's not
doing it in blackface.

Whew.

Charlene, what's wrong?

Didn't you call the hotel

and tell her not to
wear that makeup?

Well, I tried, but
she wasn't in,

and with all the stuff
with Mavis, I forgot!

Charlene, I promised the NAACP!

Well, Julia, I'm so sorry!

And now another
blast from the past,

the Sugarbakers' Design
Firm comes on strong

with Mickey and Silvia
singing "Love Is Strange."

Oh, what am I going to do?

Wing it.

If she does show up,
I pray, just this once,

common sense and
good taste will prevail.

Well, Julia, you can
forget that prayer.

The fourth Supreme just arrived.

Suzanne, I cannot believe

that you are
actually in that getup.

I've never been so
embarrassed in my life.

Why?

I think I look perfect.

You're the one that looks silly.

Would you get out there?

You're supposed to be on!

Just a minute.

Our number is next, and
don't you dare come near us!

Julia, what are
you talking about?

I have to be with
you. I'm a Supreme.

Listen, I don't give a damn

if you're a California Raisin,
you stay away from us!

Get out there.

Get out!

What if he still doesn't answer?

♪ I simply say baby ♪

♪ Oh baby ♪

♪ My sweet baby,
you're the one ♪

♪ Baby oh baby ♪

♪ My sweet baby ♪

♪ You're the one ♪

♪♪

Ladies and gentlemen,
Diana Ross and the Supremes!

♪♪

♪ Oooh! Oh oh oh oh! ♪

♪ Oh oh oh oh! ♪

♪ Oh oh oh oh! ♪

♪ Oooh ♪

♪ Oooh ♪

Oooh.

♪ If you need me call me ♪

♪ no matter where you
are, no matter how far ♪

♪ Just call my name ♪

♪ I'll be there in a hurry ♪

♪ On that you can
depend and never worry ♪

♪ No wind ♪

♪ No wind ♪

♪ No rain ♪

♪ No rain ♪

♪ Or winter's cold ♪

♪ Can stop me, baby ♪

♪ Oh baby ♪

♪ Baby ♪

♪ Baby ♪

♪ If you're my goal ♪

♪ Oh no wind ♪

♪ No wind ♪

♪ No rain ♪

♪ No rain ♪

♪ Can stop me, baby,
if you're my goal ♪

♪ Ain't no mountain
high enough ♪

♪ Oh oh! ♪

♪ Ain't no valley low enough ♪

♪ Ooh ooh! ♪

♪ Ain't no river wide enough ♪

♪ Oh oh! ♪

♪ To keep me from you ♪

♪ Ain't no mountain
high enough ♪

♪ Oh ♪

♪ Ain't no valley low enough ♪

♪ Say it again! ♪

♪ Ain't no river wide enough! ♪

♪ Hey hey ♪

♪ To keep me from you ♪

♪ Ain't no mountain
high enough ♪

♪ Nothing can keep
me keep me from you ♪

♪ Ain't no mountain
high enough ♪

♪ Ain't no mountain
high enough ♪

♪ Ain't no valley low enough ♪

♪ Ain't no river wide enough ♪

♪ Hey hey ♪

♪ To keep me from you ♪

♪ Ain't no mountain
high enough ♪

♪ Nothing can keep
me keep me from you ♪

♪ Ain't no mountain
high enough ♪

♪ No no ♪