Designing Women (1986–1993): Season 3, Episode 13 - One Sees, the Other Doesn't - full transcript
The other women are shocked when a wealthy, blind client falls for Suzanne.
♪♪ [theme]
♪ Signed, sealed
delivered, I'm yours ♪
♪ Signed, sealed,
delivered, I'm yours ♪
♪ Signed, sealed
delivered, I'm yours ♪
♪ Signed, sealed,
delivered, I'm yours ♪
♪ Signed, sealed
delivered, I'm yours ♪
♪ Signed, sealed,
delivered, I'm yours ♪
♪ Signed, sealed
delivered, I'm yours ♪
- ♪ Signed, sealed... ♪
- Charlene.
Is that bothering you?
It's skipping.
I know that, Julia.
It's been doing
it for 45 minutes.
Yeah, at first it
was just annoying,
but I just couldn't bring
myself to change the station
and after it went
on for a while.
I guess I just sort
of got fascinated.
This station must have the
biggest scratched record collection
They once played "Locomotion,"
it skipped for three days.
August 14th through
the 17th, 1986.
Don't they have DJs?
Only one.
Must be a relief
when he goes home.
Not really. He stutters.
Hi, sorry I'm late.
Mary Jo, you're just in
time to meet your new client.
Mr. Hedgecock in Atlanta,
he's coming over this morning.
Danny Hedgecock?
I like him so much. He's
always so nice on the phone,
asking about my family and all.
It's hard to
believe he's so rich.
Those South Carolina Hedgecocks
have been walking in
tall cotton for some time.
I guess they must be.
When I asked him how
much he wanted to spend
on his new Atlanta place,
he said, "Whatever y'all need."
Can you believe it?
I'm finally gonna get
to a house just
the way I want it.
Ta-da.
Welcome back.
Well, what do you think?
About what?
Julia. for heaven's sake.
Compliment her before she
bores herself into the floor.
You look very pretty, Suzanne.
Julia, I just spent one week
and $2,000 at Rancho Del Sol.
I've been massaged, exfoliated.
I've been herbal wrapped
and scrubbed with sea salt.
My pores have been vacuumed.
I was pretty before I left.
Now I expect a little
bit more reaction.
- Wow.
- Thank you.
$2,000?
That's a lot of sea salt.
Yeah, really.
Next time you want your pores
vacuumed, you just tell me.
I'll be glad to run my little
Dust Buster all over your face.
Oh, now, Anthony,
Be careful, those are
my new beauty products.
Those are all beauty products?
Uh-huh, I was looking at some
of this stuff on the
way in from the airport.
We've got turtle oil.
We've got algae from
the bottom of the ocean.
We've got seaweed,
mud, and kelp.
I'm telling you if all these
products really did beautify
your average catfish would
be a lot more attractive.
Well, pooh on all of you.
You may not notice
how ravishing I am,
but a man would
notice in a minute.
Yeah, well, thank goodness
none of those rough hairy
beasts are around right now.
I just can't stand them
at this time of the month.
[both] Suzanne.
- Must you always do that?
- What?
Treat Anthony as if he were
the eunuch of the harem.
Oh, I do not.
The what?
I'll explain later.
Well, as I was saying.
If there were a man here,
every penny of that $2,000
would be being appreciated.
You just watch.
Next man who sees me is
gonna be struck dumb with awe.
What are you
looking at, Mary Jo?
Oh, nothing it's just...
You got a little
zit right there.
You need me I'll be upstairs
in Julia's powder room.
You know once when
I was 17-years-old
I went to sing on a Saturday
afternoon television program.
I was so excited.
Mother took me to Lenox
Square to get my hair done.
I had a brand-new dress that
was almost too fine to sit in.
On that day... That day when I
spent three hours in the bathroom
bathing and brushing and
primping and making up.
I believe I cared less
about how I looked
than Suzanne does
every day of her life.
[car approaches]
Somebody is pulling up.
Maybe it's Mr. Hedgecock.
Ooh.
A car and driver, no less.
What y'all say
he did for a living?
- [doorbell chimes]
- Now, I don't know.
As many conversations I
had on the phone I never...
What is he? He's
a... He's blind.
Mary Jo, we knew that.
I prefer to think of it
as really, really, really,
really nearsighted.
Uh, I'm so sorry.
I just can't believe somebody
didn't mention it to me before.
Well, it's my fault. Sometimes
I tell people on the phone.
Sometimes I don't.
It's not exactly what you'd
call a good icebreaker.
Then again, I don't
want to startle people,
so from now on I'm
introducing myself
as Danny Hedgecock, blind guy.
You're Mary Jo, right?
Yes, I am. I'm so
pleased to meet you.
I'm so sorry. Do forgive me.
Oh, no problem.
Is Charlene here?
Hi, Danny.
Hi, Charlene.
- And I'm Julia Sugarbaker.
- Hello, Julia.
It's wonderful to finally
have you here in Atlanta.
Mary Jo, is just full of
ideas for your new house.
Um, you know what? Why don't we
kind of get to know each other today.
How long are you
gonna be in town?
Just long enough to sign
the final papers on the house
and visit some folks.
It's a shame you won't have
time to enjoy a bit more of our city.
Aah, but I did manage to get some
tickets to the Atlanta Symphony.
Jean-Pierre Rampal
is performing.
I was just listening to some early
recordings of his on the car radio.
Really? I'd love to hear them.
Ladies, I hate to interrupt,
but there's a
delivery man out here.
I told him to come
around the back,
but he's just sitting
in the drive way saying
he needs all your signatures
on the bill of lading
before he can unload.
He seems to be under
the erroneous impression
that I myself am some
kind of shiftless hired-hand
who's just waiting
around to make off
with his load of petit
point throw pillows.
Good grief. We're coming.
Will you excuse us for just
a moment, Mr. Hedgecock?
Maybe you can find
Mr. Rampal still on the radio there.
Will that be all right?
I'd like that fine.
We'll be right back, Danny.
[radio scans]
♪♪ [classical]
Hi, I'm Suzanne Sugarbaker.
How do you do?
Umm.
Don't let me bother you.
I'm just listening to this
wonderful piece of music.
Oh.
Suzanne?
I'd like you to meet
Daniel Hedgecock.
Blind guy.
Well, thank goodness.
I thought I was losing my touch.
[Charlene] That Danny
Hedgecock sure is a doll.
It's gonna be fun
working for him.
Charlene, do you know why
Mary Jo doesn't
want to talk to him
about her ideas for his house?
Well, she told me you know with
all her other clients, you know?
She brings out fabric
swatches and paint samples.
Ask them what colors they like.
You know, shows
them her sketches?
Well, she can't do
any of that with him.
Surely she can find a way.
Well, she said something about
doing her whole presentation
in scratch and sniff.
Can't believe Mary Jo said that.
She's has bad as Suzanne,
sitting in here asking
where's his dog.
Does he know Stevie Wonder.
I know. That was
so embarrassing.
Danny sure took it well, though.
Nevertheless,
I think it might be
professionally astute
to limit the contact
between Suzanne and
Mr. Hedgecock in the future.
- Uh-oh - What is it?
Well, those contracts of his.
I was going put
them in the mail,
but Suzanne was going downtown,
so she's taking
them over to his hotel.
Oh, no.
We just have to
hope for the best.
Yeah, I just hope she forgets
that question she wanted
to ask him about José Feliciano.
[knocking at door]
Hello?
Suzanne, hi.
Charlene said you were coming.
What are you doing?
Just reading.
Oh.
Well, here those interior
decorating papers.
Thank you.
My, you certainly are neat.
I've never seen such a tidy room
for a man who wasn't
unnaturally close to his mother.
I haven't seen Mom in years.
Just pretty much have to be neat
in order to keep track of things.
Oh, well, I could never do that.
- Oh?
- Just throw any ol' where.
And then Consuela...
That's my maid...
- she picks them up
and puts them away.
- Uh-Huh.
Expect some times she
has sort of a fit, you know?
And throws everything
out into the front yard.
And then she
gets the leaf blower
and blows them
all into the street.
Well, I told her.
Fit or not fit, the next
time she does that,
I'm packing her little bags
and sending her home.
- Oh, where's that?
- I don't know.
Paraguay, Uruguay. One
of those guay countries.
I mean she tells me it's
an uncontrollable seizure.
But I mean the last time
my pig got into the act
and swallowed a
pair of pantyhose.
And that's where
I draw the line.
You have a pig?
Yeah, what about it.
Oh, nothing. Go on.
Well, you can imagine
how upset I was.
I mean it's my last
pair that a run in them.
Plus the fact that pantyhose
are not good for pigs.
I mean we had to
rush Noel to the vet.
Excuse me, Mr. Hedgecock.
Aah, lunch. Bring it in, please.
Do you like lobster?
I adore lobster.
I figured it. Now, go
on with your story.
Oh, well, so we took Noel
to the vet... Thank you.
And this stupid
veterinarian, he says to me,
"Oh, don't worry. Everything
is gonna come out all right."
And I said, "Well, I
get your implication,
"and it's the most vulgar thing
"I ever heard in my life."
So you know I take Noel
home and sure enough...
[Charlene] Suzanne, we
were worried about you.
It's after 5:00.
[Julia] Did you get to
see Mr. Hedgecock?
Yes, I got to see him.
Well, what's the matter?
I'll tell you what's the matter.
He's rich, charming,
smart, funny,
from a good family, not
cheap, and he's crazy about me.
What makes you think Danny
Hedgecock is so crazy about you?
Oh, for crying
out loud, Mary Jo.
I can tell when a
man's interested in me.
I have a sixth sense.
Danny only has four.
It's just too weird for me.
I'm not convinced.
It isn't all in your
imagination?
Julia, he told me he
specifically asked for me
to bring those contracts down.
He found out my favorite
food by calling my housekeeper
and ordering us a special lunch.
He kept me talking
for three hours.
And he asked me out to dinner
and the symphony
concert tonight.
Well.
He also says that he
thinks I'm very smart.
That's it, I'm convinced.
He's got it bad.
Tell me about it.
Now, all I have to do
is figure out a way
to break this date,
you know, without
destroying him.
Break the date? Why would
you want to break the date?
I only said yes because he kind of
caught me by surprise you know?
But then, on the way
home, I realized of course
I just can't go out with him.
Why not?
I mean, I happen to be going
with the sweetest, kindest,
handsomest man in shoe leather,
and I don't even look at other
men, of course, you know?
But, you know, say something
were to happen like I got
hit on the head and temporarily
got amnesia, you know?
And Bill was away because he was
on some secret government mission.
I thought he was
dead... Charlene.
Well, I mean, I'd be
on Danny Hedgecock
like a duck on a june bug.
I mean, we're talking
about a millionaire
who spends his weekends
working with
underprivileged kids.
I mean, we're talking about a
Phi Beta Kappa from Vanderbilt
who still knows why
Hee Haw is funny.
I mean, men like that are
just not walking the streets.
Well, that's good
because men like that
would be bumping
into each other.
Well, I think we're all
agreed that Danny Hedgecock
has every good
quality in the book.
There's just one little tiny
thing that's a matter with him.
That he's blind.
No, that he wants
to go out with you.
Well, I'm sorry. I cannot go
out with every man that asks me.
If did that I have a backed
up waiting list from about 1972.
And I do not appreciate your
comments on my personal and private life.
And now if you'll excuse
me, I have things to do.
You suppose she knows she just
slammed herself in the store room?
Not to worry. Just as soon as
she realizes that she's in a room
where people actually
work. She'll get out right quick.
[Julia] Y'all a little
rough on Suzanne.
She's gonna dump on a guy
because he happens
to be handicapped,
and you're saying that
we were rough on her?
Maybe I'm just exercising
my sisterly prerogative
to defend my own blood,
but I have never known Suzanne
to be bigoted by
handicapped people.
Oh, yes, she'll say all
kinds of outrageous things,
but the only people she
really considers handicapped
would be the money-impaired.
You know, when
she was at Ole Miss,
she went out for quite a
while with this very handsome,
very wealthy young Sigma
Chi who was totally deaf.
Of course everybody joked
that was the perfect
man for Suzanne.
But it didn't bother
her one little bit.
- Mmm.
- What?
Well, nothing.
I'm just thinking,
Here's this cute,
eligible bachelor
who sat here for almost a hour
talking to all four of us,
and then he asked out Suzanne.
Well, I go with somebody.
I probably mentioned that.
No you didn't.
Well, I was sending out signals.
Oh, I guess I was, too.
It is kind of strange isn't it?
Danny going hog
wild over Suzanne.
Not at all. Men love
Suzanne. They always have.
But a blind man. Go figure it.
I don't get it.
Hello, Suzanne.
Hello, Anthony.
Are you lost?
No, thank you.
I'm just looking
around at things.
I'm not sure I've ever
been in this room before.
Oh, come on. You must have.
Oh, what about that weekend
when we all took inventory?
No, you were in Bimini.
Hey, how about that time
we all pitched in to
move the heavier...
No, you were in
Saint Croix that week.
Okay, maybe you never have
been in here. How do you like it?
Well, it's kind of
musty and dirty,
and someone should
put all this stuff away.
[chuckles]
It is away, Suzanne.
That's why they call
this the store room.
Oh.
- Anthony.
- Uh-huh.
Well, when I need
to talk to someone,
I can't talk to women
because they're always
so catty about me.
And, well, I can't talk to men
because that be letting
them in on far too much.
Maybe I can talk to you?
Get along with your flattery.
Oh, I know, Julia says I
treat you like a eunuch.
Says I say things
right to your face
like you don't count, but
do you think that's true?
Well, Suzanne, the only
way I can answer that question
is by telling the
Bominitials story.
It's a true story.
See, there was this white
family lived in Mississippi,
and they had this man who
worked for them occasionally
named Bominitials.
Now, he did various small jobs
for them on and
off for about a week.
One night he just
finished bartending a party
and the lady of
the house realized
that she didn't have any money.
So she said to him,
"Bominitials, I want
to write you a check,
but I don't know how
to spell Bominitials."
He said, "Well, I've been
meaning to talk to you about that.
"See, when I came to work
for you I told you my name,
and then I said, 'But you
can call me by my initials'."
I've always felt that story
kind of sums up a
paticular kind of relationship.
Well, whatever, but can we
please get back to me now.
Forgive me.
That's all right.
Well, I guess it all started
when I was born beautiful.
By my first birthday,
it was clear that I was
going to be ravishing.
And then by my second...
- Excuse me, Suzanne.
- Yes.
How old are you at
the end of this story?
I'm sorry, go on.
Anthony, I've always
been the pretty one.
I can't date a blind man.
Who would I be then?
Date a blind man?
Yeah.
You know Mary Jo
and Charlene and them,
they think I'm just
being a jackass.
But you understand, don't you?
I think I do,
but you don't have to
worry about that Suzanne.
You have a lot more to offer
people than just your looks.
- Really?
- Sure you do.
I know you can be a
little selfish sometimes,
a tiny bit vain.
Petty.
Anthony,
there'd better be a
"but" coming around now.
I'm starting to feel like these
little honest heartfelt talks
just are highly overrated.
The "but" is coming,
Suzanne, and here it is.
But you are a very
special and unique person,
and a lot of people
love you very much
for reasons that have
absolutely nothing to do
with your looks.
Oh, I know that.
I just think it's a
waste, that's all.
I mean, Danny
should be going out
with some nice
homely girl, you know?
I mean, some very sweet girl
with a face like a mud fence,
someone who can
really appreciate the fact
that he can't see her.
That would be best.
So what are you telling us?
I'm saying that maybe
Suzanne's problem
isn't that Danny's blind.
Maybe she's afraid
that somebody who can't
see her really can "see" her.
- You know what I mean?
- Yes.
- I'm glad you do.
- Charlene,
what I'm saying is
that all the turtle oil
and herbal wraps and
new hairdos in the world
cannot cut any
ice with this man,
and neither can the
sidelong glances, half-smiles,
and mischievous twinkles
that Suzanne has
raised to an art form.
This is her art form.
Now she would feel like Mozart
playing to an audience
that's tone deaf.
She would have to
rely on other resources.
And it's silly, but maybe
she's wondering right now
if she has any.
Yeah, but I sure wish
she'd change her mind.
- Good evening, ladies.
- Hi, Danny.
Is Suzanne ready? We've
got to get to dinner early.
No, she's not.
Come over here and sit
down with us for a minute.
All right.
Mary Jo, I understand
that you're having some problems
putting together your
plans for my house.
Well, I was, but not anymore.
You see, at first I thought
you were a special case,
and then I realized
that all any of our
customers want
is a home that's
convenient and comfortable
and will look
pretty for company.
Right.
I just don't want to spend
too much on paintings.
Uh, to tell the truth, Danny,
Suzanne isn't going to be able
to make her date
with you tonight.
- Oh.
- She's asked me
to please tell you how
very, very sorry she is,
but some business
responsibilities
have come up this evening
that just can't wait.
Suzanne is an integral
and essential part
of our organization,
and... and she's very
conscientious about her work.
- Oh, she is, absolutely.
- She's... She is.
Business first with her.
Work, work, work is her motto.
Oh. That doesn't sound
like Suzanne to me.
- [Charlene] No?
- Not at all.
Of course, I just
met her yesterday.
I guess she could have
this Mary Poppins side to her.
No. She couldn't.
No way.
Not that I'm putting her
down, you understand.
Quite the contrary.
Why, she's the greatest old gal
I've met in some time.
Is she?
Sure, and she's so funny.
Suzanne?
Are you kidding?
The lady owns a pig.
Yeah, that is kind of funny.
I guess we'd gotten used to it.
And she's the sweetest thing.
Excuse me, this is Suzanne
Sugarbaker, correct?
- Why, yes.
- Just checking.
You know, Danny,
there are some
people who think...
I mean, some silly people
and certainly
nobody in this room...
But some people find
Suzanne a little spoiled.
Why? Because she
knows what she wants
and she goes out and gets it?
I admire that more
than anything.
I've had to do a
little of that myself.
Well, Danny, there's one thing
that you may not know about her,
and I think you should.
She's an incredibly
beautiful woman.
Oh, I knew that.
Though it kind of
sounds like you all didn't.
[door opens]
Well?
Are we going out
to dinner or what?
I mean, here I
am all dressed up,
and where are you?
I swear, men are all the same.
Hi, gorgeous.
They don't care if you
starve to death waiting.
- Come on now, let's go.
- Yes, ma'am.
Oh. Now, Danny,
right now I'm giving
you a little pout
that says I'm mad with you,
but I'll forgive you
if the restaurant's nice enough.
Now I'm throwing back
my head in a spirited fashion
to make my earrings dance.
And now you're smiling at me.
Suzanne, I can
read you like a book.
Maybe. But just don't
think that on the first date
you're going to get
to read it in Braille.
Closed-Captioned By J.R.
Media Services, Inc. Burbank, CA
♪ Signed, sealed
delivered, I'm yours ♪
♪ Signed, sealed,
delivered, I'm yours ♪
♪ Signed, sealed
delivered, I'm yours ♪
♪ Signed, sealed,
delivered, I'm yours ♪
♪ Signed, sealed
delivered, I'm yours ♪
♪ Signed, sealed,
delivered, I'm yours ♪
♪ Signed, sealed
delivered, I'm yours ♪
- ♪ Signed, sealed... ♪
- Charlene.
Is that bothering you?
It's skipping.
I know that, Julia.
It's been doing
it for 45 minutes.
Yeah, at first it
was just annoying,
but I just couldn't bring
myself to change the station
and after it went
on for a while.
I guess I just sort
of got fascinated.
This station must have the
biggest scratched record collection
They once played "Locomotion,"
it skipped for three days.
August 14th through
the 17th, 1986.
Don't they have DJs?
Only one.
Must be a relief
when he goes home.
Not really. He stutters.
Hi, sorry I'm late.
Mary Jo, you're just in
time to meet your new client.
Mr. Hedgecock in Atlanta,
he's coming over this morning.
Danny Hedgecock?
I like him so much. He's
always so nice on the phone,
asking about my family and all.
It's hard to
believe he's so rich.
Those South Carolina Hedgecocks
have been walking in
tall cotton for some time.
I guess they must be.
When I asked him how
much he wanted to spend
on his new Atlanta place,
he said, "Whatever y'all need."
Can you believe it?
I'm finally gonna get
to a house just
the way I want it.
Ta-da.
Welcome back.
Well, what do you think?
About what?
Julia. for heaven's sake.
Compliment her before she
bores herself into the floor.
You look very pretty, Suzanne.
Julia, I just spent one week
and $2,000 at Rancho Del Sol.
I've been massaged, exfoliated.
I've been herbal wrapped
and scrubbed with sea salt.
My pores have been vacuumed.
I was pretty before I left.
Now I expect a little
bit more reaction.
- Wow.
- Thank you.
$2,000?
That's a lot of sea salt.
Yeah, really.
Next time you want your pores
vacuumed, you just tell me.
I'll be glad to run my little
Dust Buster all over your face.
Oh, now, Anthony,
Be careful, those are
my new beauty products.
Those are all beauty products?
Uh-huh, I was looking at some
of this stuff on the
way in from the airport.
We've got turtle oil.
We've got algae from
the bottom of the ocean.
We've got seaweed,
mud, and kelp.
I'm telling you if all these
products really did beautify
your average catfish would
be a lot more attractive.
Well, pooh on all of you.
You may not notice
how ravishing I am,
but a man would
notice in a minute.
Yeah, well, thank goodness
none of those rough hairy
beasts are around right now.
I just can't stand them
at this time of the month.
[both] Suzanne.
- Must you always do that?
- What?
Treat Anthony as if he were
the eunuch of the harem.
Oh, I do not.
The what?
I'll explain later.
Well, as I was saying.
If there were a man here,
every penny of that $2,000
would be being appreciated.
You just watch.
Next man who sees me is
gonna be struck dumb with awe.
What are you
looking at, Mary Jo?
Oh, nothing it's just...
You got a little
zit right there.
You need me I'll be upstairs
in Julia's powder room.
You know once when
I was 17-years-old
I went to sing on a Saturday
afternoon television program.
I was so excited.
Mother took me to Lenox
Square to get my hair done.
I had a brand-new dress that
was almost too fine to sit in.
On that day... That day when I
spent three hours in the bathroom
bathing and brushing and
primping and making up.
I believe I cared less
about how I looked
than Suzanne does
every day of her life.
[car approaches]
Somebody is pulling up.
Maybe it's Mr. Hedgecock.
Ooh.
A car and driver, no less.
What y'all say
he did for a living?
- [doorbell chimes]
- Now, I don't know.
As many conversations I
had on the phone I never...
What is he? He's
a... He's blind.
Mary Jo, we knew that.
I prefer to think of it
as really, really, really,
really nearsighted.
Uh, I'm so sorry.
I just can't believe somebody
didn't mention it to me before.
Well, it's my fault. Sometimes
I tell people on the phone.
Sometimes I don't.
It's not exactly what you'd
call a good icebreaker.
Then again, I don't
want to startle people,
so from now on I'm
introducing myself
as Danny Hedgecock, blind guy.
You're Mary Jo, right?
Yes, I am. I'm so
pleased to meet you.
I'm so sorry. Do forgive me.
Oh, no problem.
Is Charlene here?
Hi, Danny.
Hi, Charlene.
- And I'm Julia Sugarbaker.
- Hello, Julia.
It's wonderful to finally
have you here in Atlanta.
Mary Jo, is just full of
ideas for your new house.
Um, you know what? Why don't we
kind of get to know each other today.
How long are you
gonna be in town?
Just long enough to sign
the final papers on the house
and visit some folks.
It's a shame you won't have
time to enjoy a bit more of our city.
Aah, but I did manage to get some
tickets to the Atlanta Symphony.
Jean-Pierre Rampal
is performing.
I was just listening to some early
recordings of his on the car radio.
Really? I'd love to hear them.
Ladies, I hate to interrupt,
but there's a
delivery man out here.
I told him to come
around the back,
but he's just sitting
in the drive way saying
he needs all your signatures
on the bill of lading
before he can unload.
He seems to be under
the erroneous impression
that I myself am some
kind of shiftless hired-hand
who's just waiting
around to make off
with his load of petit
point throw pillows.
Good grief. We're coming.
Will you excuse us for just
a moment, Mr. Hedgecock?
Maybe you can find
Mr. Rampal still on the radio there.
Will that be all right?
I'd like that fine.
We'll be right back, Danny.
[radio scans]
♪♪ [classical]
Hi, I'm Suzanne Sugarbaker.
How do you do?
Umm.
Don't let me bother you.
I'm just listening to this
wonderful piece of music.
Oh.
Suzanne?
I'd like you to meet
Daniel Hedgecock.
Blind guy.
Well, thank goodness.
I thought I was losing my touch.
[Charlene] That Danny
Hedgecock sure is a doll.
It's gonna be fun
working for him.
Charlene, do you know why
Mary Jo doesn't
want to talk to him
about her ideas for his house?
Well, she told me you know with
all her other clients, you know?
She brings out fabric
swatches and paint samples.
Ask them what colors they like.
You know, shows
them her sketches?
Well, she can't do
any of that with him.
Surely she can find a way.
Well, she said something about
doing her whole presentation
in scratch and sniff.
Can't believe Mary Jo said that.
She's has bad as Suzanne,
sitting in here asking
where's his dog.
Does he know Stevie Wonder.
I know. That was
so embarrassing.
Danny sure took it well, though.
Nevertheless,
I think it might be
professionally astute
to limit the contact
between Suzanne and
Mr. Hedgecock in the future.
- Uh-oh - What is it?
Well, those contracts of his.
I was going put
them in the mail,
but Suzanne was going downtown,
so she's taking
them over to his hotel.
Oh, no.
We just have to
hope for the best.
Yeah, I just hope she forgets
that question she wanted
to ask him about José Feliciano.
[knocking at door]
Hello?
Suzanne, hi.
Charlene said you were coming.
What are you doing?
Just reading.
Oh.
Well, here those interior
decorating papers.
Thank you.
My, you certainly are neat.
I've never seen such a tidy room
for a man who wasn't
unnaturally close to his mother.
I haven't seen Mom in years.
Just pretty much have to be neat
in order to keep track of things.
Oh, well, I could never do that.
- Oh?
- Just throw any ol' where.
And then Consuela...
That's my maid...
- she picks them up
and puts them away.
- Uh-Huh.
Expect some times she
has sort of a fit, you know?
And throws everything
out into the front yard.
And then she
gets the leaf blower
and blows them
all into the street.
Well, I told her.
Fit or not fit, the next
time she does that,
I'm packing her little bags
and sending her home.
- Oh, where's that?
- I don't know.
Paraguay, Uruguay. One
of those guay countries.
I mean she tells me it's
an uncontrollable seizure.
But I mean the last time
my pig got into the act
and swallowed a
pair of pantyhose.
And that's where
I draw the line.
You have a pig?
Yeah, what about it.
Oh, nothing. Go on.
Well, you can imagine
how upset I was.
I mean it's my last
pair that a run in them.
Plus the fact that pantyhose
are not good for pigs.
I mean we had to
rush Noel to the vet.
Excuse me, Mr. Hedgecock.
Aah, lunch. Bring it in, please.
Do you like lobster?
I adore lobster.
I figured it. Now, go
on with your story.
Oh, well, so we took Noel
to the vet... Thank you.
And this stupid
veterinarian, he says to me,
"Oh, don't worry. Everything
is gonna come out all right."
And I said, "Well, I
get your implication,
"and it's the most vulgar thing
"I ever heard in my life."
So you know I take Noel
home and sure enough...
[Charlene] Suzanne, we
were worried about you.
It's after 5:00.
[Julia] Did you get to
see Mr. Hedgecock?
Yes, I got to see him.
Well, what's the matter?
I'll tell you what's the matter.
He's rich, charming,
smart, funny,
from a good family, not
cheap, and he's crazy about me.
What makes you think Danny
Hedgecock is so crazy about you?
Oh, for crying
out loud, Mary Jo.
I can tell when a
man's interested in me.
I have a sixth sense.
Danny only has four.
It's just too weird for me.
I'm not convinced.
It isn't all in your
imagination?
Julia, he told me he
specifically asked for me
to bring those contracts down.
He found out my favorite
food by calling my housekeeper
and ordering us a special lunch.
He kept me talking
for three hours.
And he asked me out to dinner
and the symphony
concert tonight.
Well.
He also says that he
thinks I'm very smart.
That's it, I'm convinced.
He's got it bad.
Tell me about it.
Now, all I have to do
is figure out a way
to break this date,
you know, without
destroying him.
Break the date? Why would
you want to break the date?
I only said yes because he kind of
caught me by surprise you know?
But then, on the way
home, I realized of course
I just can't go out with him.
Why not?
I mean, I happen to be going
with the sweetest, kindest,
handsomest man in shoe leather,
and I don't even look at other
men, of course, you know?
But, you know, say something
were to happen like I got
hit on the head and temporarily
got amnesia, you know?
And Bill was away because he was
on some secret government mission.
I thought he was
dead... Charlene.
Well, I mean, I'd be
on Danny Hedgecock
like a duck on a june bug.
I mean, we're talking
about a millionaire
who spends his weekends
working with
underprivileged kids.
I mean, we're talking about a
Phi Beta Kappa from Vanderbilt
who still knows why
Hee Haw is funny.
I mean, men like that are
just not walking the streets.
Well, that's good
because men like that
would be bumping
into each other.
Well, I think we're all
agreed that Danny Hedgecock
has every good
quality in the book.
There's just one little tiny
thing that's a matter with him.
That he's blind.
No, that he wants
to go out with you.
Well, I'm sorry. I cannot go
out with every man that asks me.
If did that I have a backed
up waiting list from about 1972.
And I do not appreciate your
comments on my personal and private life.
And now if you'll excuse
me, I have things to do.
You suppose she knows she just
slammed herself in the store room?
Not to worry. Just as soon as
she realizes that she's in a room
where people actually
work. She'll get out right quick.
[Julia] Y'all a little
rough on Suzanne.
She's gonna dump on a guy
because he happens
to be handicapped,
and you're saying that
we were rough on her?
Maybe I'm just exercising
my sisterly prerogative
to defend my own blood,
but I have never known Suzanne
to be bigoted by
handicapped people.
Oh, yes, she'll say all
kinds of outrageous things,
but the only people she
really considers handicapped
would be the money-impaired.
You know, when
she was at Ole Miss,
she went out for quite a
while with this very handsome,
very wealthy young Sigma
Chi who was totally deaf.
Of course everybody joked
that was the perfect
man for Suzanne.
But it didn't bother
her one little bit.
- Mmm.
- What?
Well, nothing.
I'm just thinking,
Here's this cute,
eligible bachelor
who sat here for almost a hour
talking to all four of us,
and then he asked out Suzanne.
Well, I go with somebody.
I probably mentioned that.
No you didn't.
Well, I was sending out signals.
Oh, I guess I was, too.
It is kind of strange isn't it?
Danny going hog
wild over Suzanne.
Not at all. Men love
Suzanne. They always have.
But a blind man. Go figure it.
I don't get it.
Hello, Suzanne.
Hello, Anthony.
Are you lost?
No, thank you.
I'm just looking
around at things.
I'm not sure I've ever
been in this room before.
Oh, come on. You must have.
Oh, what about that weekend
when we all took inventory?
No, you were in Bimini.
Hey, how about that time
we all pitched in to
move the heavier...
No, you were in
Saint Croix that week.
Okay, maybe you never have
been in here. How do you like it?
Well, it's kind of
musty and dirty,
and someone should
put all this stuff away.
[chuckles]
It is away, Suzanne.
That's why they call
this the store room.
Oh.
- Anthony.
- Uh-huh.
Well, when I need
to talk to someone,
I can't talk to women
because they're always
so catty about me.
And, well, I can't talk to men
because that be letting
them in on far too much.
Maybe I can talk to you?
Get along with your flattery.
Oh, I know, Julia says I
treat you like a eunuch.
Says I say things
right to your face
like you don't count, but
do you think that's true?
Well, Suzanne, the only
way I can answer that question
is by telling the
Bominitials story.
It's a true story.
See, there was this white
family lived in Mississippi,
and they had this man who
worked for them occasionally
named Bominitials.
Now, he did various small jobs
for them on and
off for about a week.
One night he just
finished bartending a party
and the lady of
the house realized
that she didn't have any money.
So she said to him,
"Bominitials, I want
to write you a check,
but I don't know how
to spell Bominitials."
He said, "Well, I've been
meaning to talk to you about that.
"See, when I came to work
for you I told you my name,
and then I said, 'But you
can call me by my initials'."
I've always felt that story
kind of sums up a
paticular kind of relationship.
Well, whatever, but can we
please get back to me now.
Forgive me.
That's all right.
Well, I guess it all started
when I was born beautiful.
By my first birthday,
it was clear that I was
going to be ravishing.
And then by my second...
- Excuse me, Suzanne.
- Yes.
How old are you at
the end of this story?
I'm sorry, go on.
Anthony, I've always
been the pretty one.
I can't date a blind man.
Who would I be then?
Date a blind man?
Yeah.
You know Mary Jo
and Charlene and them,
they think I'm just
being a jackass.
But you understand, don't you?
I think I do,
but you don't have to
worry about that Suzanne.
You have a lot more to offer
people than just your looks.
- Really?
- Sure you do.
I know you can be a
little selfish sometimes,
a tiny bit vain.
Petty.
Anthony,
there'd better be a
"but" coming around now.
I'm starting to feel like these
little honest heartfelt talks
just are highly overrated.
The "but" is coming,
Suzanne, and here it is.
But you are a very
special and unique person,
and a lot of people
love you very much
for reasons that have
absolutely nothing to do
with your looks.
Oh, I know that.
I just think it's a
waste, that's all.
I mean, Danny
should be going out
with some nice
homely girl, you know?
I mean, some very sweet girl
with a face like a mud fence,
someone who can
really appreciate the fact
that he can't see her.
That would be best.
So what are you telling us?
I'm saying that maybe
Suzanne's problem
isn't that Danny's blind.
Maybe she's afraid
that somebody who can't
see her really can "see" her.
- You know what I mean?
- Yes.
- I'm glad you do.
- Charlene,
what I'm saying is
that all the turtle oil
and herbal wraps and
new hairdos in the world
cannot cut any
ice with this man,
and neither can the
sidelong glances, half-smiles,
and mischievous twinkles
that Suzanne has
raised to an art form.
This is her art form.
Now she would feel like Mozart
playing to an audience
that's tone deaf.
She would have to
rely on other resources.
And it's silly, but maybe
she's wondering right now
if she has any.
Yeah, but I sure wish
she'd change her mind.
- Good evening, ladies.
- Hi, Danny.
Is Suzanne ready? We've
got to get to dinner early.
No, she's not.
Come over here and sit
down with us for a minute.
All right.
Mary Jo, I understand
that you're having some problems
putting together your
plans for my house.
Well, I was, but not anymore.
You see, at first I thought
you were a special case,
and then I realized
that all any of our
customers want
is a home that's
convenient and comfortable
and will look
pretty for company.
Right.
I just don't want to spend
too much on paintings.
Uh, to tell the truth, Danny,
Suzanne isn't going to be able
to make her date
with you tonight.
- Oh.
- She's asked me
to please tell you how
very, very sorry she is,
but some business
responsibilities
have come up this evening
that just can't wait.
Suzanne is an integral
and essential part
of our organization,
and... and she's very
conscientious about her work.
- Oh, she is, absolutely.
- She's... She is.
Business first with her.
Work, work, work is her motto.
Oh. That doesn't sound
like Suzanne to me.
- [Charlene] No?
- Not at all.
Of course, I just
met her yesterday.
I guess she could have
this Mary Poppins side to her.
No. She couldn't.
No way.
Not that I'm putting her
down, you understand.
Quite the contrary.
Why, she's the greatest old gal
I've met in some time.
Is she?
Sure, and she's so funny.
Suzanne?
Are you kidding?
The lady owns a pig.
Yeah, that is kind of funny.
I guess we'd gotten used to it.
And she's the sweetest thing.
Excuse me, this is Suzanne
Sugarbaker, correct?
- Why, yes.
- Just checking.
You know, Danny,
there are some
people who think...
I mean, some silly people
and certainly
nobody in this room...
But some people find
Suzanne a little spoiled.
Why? Because she
knows what she wants
and she goes out and gets it?
I admire that more
than anything.
I've had to do a
little of that myself.
Well, Danny, there's one thing
that you may not know about her,
and I think you should.
She's an incredibly
beautiful woman.
Oh, I knew that.
Though it kind of
sounds like you all didn't.
[door opens]
Well?
Are we going out
to dinner or what?
I mean, here I
am all dressed up,
and where are you?
I swear, men are all the same.
Hi, gorgeous.
They don't care if you
starve to death waiting.
- Come on now, let's go.
- Yes, ma'am.
Oh. Now, Danny,
right now I'm giving
you a little pout
that says I'm mad with you,
but I'll forgive you
if the restaurant's nice enough.
Now I'm throwing back
my head in a spirited fashion
to make my earrings dance.
And now you're smiling at me.
Suzanne, I can
read you like a book.
Maybe. But just don't
think that on the first date
you're going to get
to read it in Braille.
Closed-Captioned By J.R.
Media Services, Inc. Burbank, CA