Darkwing Duck (1991–1992): Season 1, Episode 36 - Dry Hard - full transcript
St. Canard is roasting in a summer heat wave, and so is Drake's lawn! As much as he wants to get his sprinkler system working though, a rash of bad bottled water sets the hero on the trail of a crooked water salesman, Bud Flood, who after an accident in a vat of spoiled water, becomes the Liquidator! But how can Darkwing stop a villain made of water when he can't even fix a leak in his sprinkler system?
♪ DARING DUCK OF MYSTERY ♪
♪ CHAMPION OF RIGHT ♪
♪ SWOOPS OUT
OF THE SHADOWS ♪
♪ DARKWING OF THE NIGHT ♪
♪ SOMEWHERE
SOME VILLAIN SCHEMES ♪
♪ BUT HIS NUMBER'S UP ♪
3, 2, 1!
♪ DARKWING DUCK ♪
♪ WHEN THERE'S TROUBLE
YOU CALL D.W. ♪
♪ DARKWING DUCK ♪
LET'S GET DANGEROUS.
♪ DARKWING DUCK ♪
DARKWING, DARKWING DUCK!
♪ A CLOUD OF SMOKE
AND HE APPEARS ♪
♪ THE MASTER OF SURPRISE ♪
♪ WHO'S THAT CUNNING
MIND BEHIND ♪
♪ THE SHADOWY DISGUISE ♪
♪ NOBODY KNOWS FOR SURE ♪
♪ THE BAD GUYS
ARE OUT OF LUCK ♪
♪ HERE COMES ♪
♪ DARKWING DUCK ♪
LOOK OUT!
♪ WHEN THERE'S TROUBLE
YOU CALL D.W. ♪
♪ DARKWING DUCK ♪
LET'S GET DANGEROUS!
♪ DARKWING DUCK ♪
♪ YOU BETTER WATCH OUT,
YOU BAD BOYS ♪
♪ DARKWING DUCK ♪♪
[RADIO]
IT'S ANOTHER HOT SCORCHER,
THE 25th DAY
OF THIS HEAT WAVE.
SPEAKING OF HOT,
HERE'S ANOTHER ONE
THAT'S BURNING
UP THE CHARTS.
[MUSIC PLAYS]
OOPS.
HOW GOES THE PLUMBING,
DRAKESTER?
UH, FINE, FINE.
THE ORIGINAL
MR. FIX-IT HAS IT
ALL UNDER CONTROL.
WHOA! HO HO!
HO HO!
[GASP]
WHOA HO HO HO!
IT LOOKS LIKE
YOU NEED A 3/4
PINCKNEY FLANGE.
DO I TELL YOU HOW
TO LAY SIDEWALKS?
COMING THROUGH.
NOTHING'S BETTER
FOR THE BEVERAGE BIZ
THAN A HEAT WAVE.
BUT WHY TAKE CHANCES?
HOW ABOUT
SOME COMPLIMENTARY
POTATO CHIPS, SIR?
COMPLIMENT-ERARY?
WHY, SURE.
[FIRE ALARM RINGS]
[COUGHING]
MINERAL WATER, $1.00 A CUP.
WHAT A BARGAIN!
SAY IT WITH ME.
WHAT A BARGAIN.
WHAT A BARGAIN.
NATURAL MINERAL WATER...
FROM THE TAP, NATURALLY.
BEHOLD, ONE AND ALL.
GASP IN AMAZEMENT
AT THE MASTERPIECE
OF A TRUE PLUMBING GENIUS.
UH! AAH!
GENIUS!
LOOKS LIKE
YOU COULD USE
A 3/4 PINCKNEY FLANGE,
DRAKEROO.
I KNOW THAT.
YOU THINK I WAS
BORN YESTERDAY?
I'VE GOT BUCKETS
OF FLANGES INSIDE.
LAUNCHPAD,
WHAT'S A PINCKNEY FLANGE?
OH, BOY!SOFT COPY
WITH TOM LOCKJAW.
AT THE EXPENSIVE
LA GRANDE YUPPE,
PATRONS FOUND THAT EVEN
THE RICH AND BEAUTIFUL
CAN'T ESCAPE THE PLAGUE
OF DISGUSTING WATER.
IT WAS HORRIBLE.
IT TASTED LIKE
MUSTY CORDUROY PANTS.
IT WAS MORE LIKE
SCORCHED INSECTS.
OR REALLY CHEAP
ZINFANDEL.
EWW.
EWW.
BUD FLOOD, OWNER OF
FLOOD WATER BOTTLING COMPANY,
IS A FOREMOST LEADER
IN WATER PHYSICS.
[FEEDBACK]
THE PROBLEM IS
BAD-TASTING MOLECULES
THAT HAVE BEEN AROUND
SINCE DINOSAUR DAYS
HAVE WORKED THEIR WAY
INTO THE REGULAR
WATER MOLECULES OF...
MOST OF MY COMPETITORS.
EWW! I WOULDN'T
WANT TO DRINK THOSE.
[APPLAUSE]
[CHEERING]
AND WITH BUD FLOOD
SPARKLING CRYSTAL-PURE
FLOOD WATER,
I'LL NEVER HAVE TO.
♪ IT TASTES
SO GOOD ♪
♪ WE THINK
YOU OUGHTER ♪
♪ DRINK SPARKING
CRYSTAL-PURE FLOOD WATER ♪♪
AHH.
THAT MAY BE,
BUT OFFICIALS SUSPECT
SOMEONE'S BEEN BEFOULING
OUR BOTTLED WATERS.
BEFOULED? NOBODY BEFOULS
THE DRINKING WATER
OF ST. CANARD
WHILE I'M AROUND.
THIS IS A JOB
FOR DARKWING DUCK!
THIS IS A JOB
FOR LAWRENCE OF ARABIA.
I'LL SAY. IT'S HOTTER
THAN A MONKEY'S UNCLE.
LET'S STOP BY
BEVERAGE KING.
THEY'VE GOT
LOTS OF DRINKS.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN,
EVERYTHING'S SOLD OUT?
EVERYTHING
THAT DOESN'T
TASTE LIKE MUD.
IT SEEMS BUD FLOOD'S WATER'S
STILL A HOT SELLER,
AS WELL AS OUR FAVORITE,
CUCKOO FIZZY WATER.
ONE OF THEM WILL BE
THE NEXT BOTTLER
BLIGHTED BY THIS
BEVERAGE-BEFOULING BANDIT.
SLOP, SLOP, FIZZ, FIZZ.
I AM THE TERROR
THAT FLAPS IN THE NIGHT.
I'M THE PARKING METER
THAT EXPIRES WHILE YOU SHOP.
I AM DARKWING DUCK!
IT'S BUD FLOOD!
♪ BUD, BUD, BUD,
BUDDY FLOOD ♪♪
THAT'S RIGHT, LAUNCHPAD.
FLOOD'S BEEN POLLUTING
HIS COMPETITORS' WATERS
SO HIS ALONE WILL BE
THE ONLY DRINKABLE DRINK.
IT'S THE ULTIMATE
IN ADVERTISING.
WOULD YOU RATHER DRINK
MY PURE MOUNTAIN MAGIC
OR A BIG, FAT
MONKEY BRAIN?
HMM. YOUR MOUNTAIN
MAGIC, OF COURSE,
BUT YOU'RE STILL
GOING UP THE RIVER,
MR. TASTE...
AAH!
TEST.
HELP ME!
I'M MELTING!
DON'T BE SUCH A BABY, FLOOD.
IT'S ONLY...
WATER.
WHERE DID HE GO?
CASES ARE
SO MUCH EASIER
WHEN THE BAD GUY
OFFS HIMSELF.
[RADIO]
AFTER 26 DAYS
OF THIS HEAT WAVE,
WE'RE STRUGGLING
TO KEEP OUR LAWNS ALIVE.
SPEAKING OF LAWNS,
HERE'S DARLIN',
I LAWN FOR YOU.
MR. MUDDLEFOOT,
I'M FROMBETTER THAN YOUR
HOME AND GARDEN MAGAZINE.
COULD I PHOTOGRAPH
YOUR SPRINKLER SYSTEM
FOR OUR COVER?
SURE THING, SPUD.
KNOCK YOURSELF OUT.
OH, A PLUMBING
SPECTACULAR
TO RIVAL THE
IMPERIAL FOUNTAINS
OF SODA JERK. OOH!
I'VE GOT YOUR PLUMBING
SPECTACULAR RIGHT HERE.
GET A LOAD OF THIS!
COME ON, COME ON.
WHOOSH, WHOOSH,
WATER, SPLASH. LET'S GO!
HAVE YOU TRIED
A PINCKNEY FLANGE?
I DON'T NEED
NO PINCKNEY FLANGE.
I'M HANDY.
I'M RESOURCEFUL.
I'M AMBIDEXTROUS.
COWABUNGA!
PPOUUKK!
I'M...
GOING SHOPPING.
PLUMBER JUNCTION,
DRAINS "R" US,
INTERNATIONAL
HOUSE OF HOSE.
YOU'D THINK
SOMEBODY WOULD CARRY
A 3/4 PINCKNEY FLANGE.
HEY!
WHAT'S GOING ON?
WHO ARE YOU?
♪ WHAT'S GOING ON HERE?
WHO COULD HE BE? ♪
[HUMMINGBATTLE HYMN
OF THE REPUBLIC]
I WAS A MEAGER BUT BRILLIANT
BOTTLED WATER SALESMAN
IN THE BEAUTIFUL BURG
OF ST. CANARD.
♪ SAINT, SAINT, SAINT,
ST. CANARD ♪
ENOUGH OF THIS
SONG AND DANCE!
YOU MEAN YOU'RE--
CORRECTION--
IWAS BUD FLOOD...
♪ BUD, BUD, BUD,
BUDDY FLOOD ♪
BEFORE YOU
MERCILESSLY THREW ME
INTO THAT CONTAMINATED
VAT OF WATER.
THREW YOU?
YOU FELL INTO THE VAT.
I WASN'T RESPONSIBLE.
WE EVEN
TRIED TO SAVE YOU.
NEVERTHELESS,
I BECAME THE NEW
AND IMPROVED MASTER
OF ALL LIQUIDS--
THE LIQUIDATOR.
♪ HE'S WET
AND HE'S COOL ♪
♪ HE'S REALLY HIP ♪
♪ HE MAY BE MADE OF WATER ♪
♪ BUT HE'S NO DRIP ♪
♪ DOO WAH ♪
HAVEN'T YOU HEARD?
THE WET LOOK IS OUT.
EWW!
YECCHH!
ARE YOUR MUSCLES
SORE, TIRED, ACHING?
TRY LIQUIDATOR BRAND
DEEP HEATING RUB.
OOH, WATER.
I'M REALLY SCARED.
YEOW! THAT'S HOT!
NOT JUST HOT,
BOILING!
♪ BOILING WATER ♪
♪ THAT STUFF'S HOT ♪
♪ LIKE A BIG RED
LOBSTER IN A POT ♪♪
AHH...
LOOKS LIKE THIS DUCK'S
GOOSE IS COOKED.
HERE IN ST. CANARD'S SEWERS,
WE'VE SURROUNDED
A LOCAL CRIME FIGHTER
WITH A WALL
OF BOILING WATER.
D.W.?
D.W.?
♪ DARKWING DUCK ♪
AAH! LOBSTER WOMEN!
NEVER MIND
THE SEAFOOD.
YOU SQUISHED
THE BAD GUY.
I--I DID?
GRRRRRR!
THIS IS NO ORDINARY
PUDDLE OF WATER.
GRRRRRR!
GRRRRRR!
PURSUE THAT
PERPETRATING PUDDLE.
COME ON!
AH HA HA HA HA HA!
AH HA HA HA HA HA HA!
FOLLOW THAT PIPE!
♪ FOLLOW THAT PIPE ♪
GO ON, GET OUT.
GET OUT.
OW!
THERE.
ALL WE GOT TO DO IS
TRACK THIS PIPE TO ITS END,
AND WE'LL HAVE HIM.
THE ST. CANARD WATERWORKS!
DON'T WORRY. LITTLE DOES
THE DEMENTED DRIP KNOW
HE'S MATCHING WITS WITH
THE PRINCE OF PLUMBING.
HEY!
WHAT THE...
WHAT'S GOING ON
OUT THERE?
THE FEATHERED FAVORITE
EASILY FOILS
THE FIENDISH FLUID'S
FELONIOUS FLIGHT.
BUT LOOK WHAT YOU DID
TO THE WATERWORKS.
IT MAY NOT LOOK GREAT,
BUT THERE ARE NO LEAKS.
WHO'D THINK STOPPING A
WATERY VILLAIN WAS SO HARD?
HARD? DARKWING DUCK,
YOU'VE GIVEN ME
A STUNNING SLANT
FOR MY NEW
ADVERTISING CAMPAIGN--
HARD WATER!
HUH?
BINKIE, WE GOT A PROBLEM.
THISIS HARD WATER.
AS IS ALL THE WATER
IN ST. CANARD.
SO HAVE A DRINK...
ON ME.
AAH!
AAH!
AAH!
GEE, THIS WATER'S
NOT HARD.
♪ WE CAN DRINK THE BAY,
NYAH NYAH ♪♪
OH, NO, YOU CAN'T.
WELL, THIS IS
HIGHLY UNUSUAL.
WE'RE STUCK!
I KNOW.
ARE YOU DRY, PARCHED,
CRAVING SOMETHING
WET AND WILD?
CAN'T SEEM
TO QUENCH YOUR THIRST
WITH ORDINARY TAP RUBBER?
TRY SPARKLING CRYSTAL-PURE
FLOOD WATER,
NOW ON SALE FOR
THE UNBELIEVABLY LOW PRICE
OF $5,000 A BOTTLE.
[GULP]
AHH!
IT'S GOOD.
DARKWING DUCK'S
FAITHFUL SIDEKICK
VAINLY ATTEMPTS
TO FREE HIMSELF
OF THE RUBBERY BLOB
WHICH WAS AUDUBON BAY.
LUCKILY, OUR FLAPPING TERROR
POSSESSES THE VERY LATEST
IN CRIME-BUSTING TECHNOLOGY--
A 200-HORSEPOWER THING CUTTER.
ADIOS, THING CUTTER.
WHERE ARE WE GOING?
JUST FOLLOW ME.
UHH! UHH!
UHH! UHH!
GEE, D.W.,
MAYBE IT'S NOT
THE BEST DAY
TO GO BOUNCING
UP A 95-STORY
BUILDING.
96. WE WON'T
BE BOUNCING LONG.
THE IMPACT SHOULD SHATTER
THE HARDENED WATER.
NOW, ON MY COMMAND--
HOPE THIS DOESN'T HURT--
JUMP!
WHOA!
OHH!
AAH!
AAH!
IT HURT.
LAUNCHPAD,
WE'RE GOING TO VISIT
THE LIQUIDATOR'S
BOTTLING FACTORY.
BUT FIRST, I THINK
I'VE GOT A WAY
TO BEAT THIS HEAT.
HA HA HA!
MY MINERAL WATER
IS SELLING
LIKE HOT CAKES.
I AM THE TERROR
THAT FLAPS IN THE NIGHT.
I AM THE SOAP SCUM
THAT LINES YOUR BATHTUB.
I AM--
HA HA HA HA!
OH, I LOVE YOUR
NEW SUMMER COSTUME.
THANK YOU, MR. DUCKWELL.
SO NOW WE'RE
FASHION EXPERTS, ARE WE?
I'M SORRY.
YOU REMIND ME
OF MY COUSIN MORTY
IN THAT GETUP.
GIRLS WOULD NEVER
TALK TO HIM.
AHA, BUT MORTY PROBABLY
WASN'T VERY HANDY WITH...
A COMMON CLEANING SPONGE!
[GASP]
AWAY GOES LIQUI,
DOWN THE DRAIN.
NOW, LAUNCHPAD! NOW!
HEY! WHAT THE...
I AM THE TERROR
THAT FLAPS IN YOUR PIPES.
I'M THE HAIRBALL
THAT CLOGS YOUR DRAIN.
I AM THE ORIGINAL MR. FIX-IT!
AND YOU'RE
IN HOT WATER, LIQUI.
L.P., STEAM HIS COLLAR.
TEMPERATURE GOING UP.
HEH HEH.
WHOA.
AHH, EVAPORATION DOES
SUCH WONDERS FOR MY SKIN.
REMEMBER WHEN YOU LEFT
THE EMPTY COFFEEPOT
ON THE BURNER?
I THINK
THIS IS WORSE.
[GASP]
[TOOT]
O.K., SO
I'M A LOUSY PLUMBER.
SO SUE ME, ALREADY!
I NEVER GET THAT
UNSIGHTLY SCORCHED LOOK.
LATER.
THE FREEZER.
THAT'S JUST DANDY.
LET'S SEE HIM
GET OUT OF THERE.
WELL, THAT'S CREATIVE.
UHH! IT'S LIKE
EATING SOUP WITH A FORK.
EVEN IN TEMPERATURES
OF 50-BELOW,
THE NEW IMPROVED
LIQUIDATOR
KEEPS ON RUNNING.
OR LURCHING SLUGGISHLY,
AS THE CASE MAY BE.
ONCE I THAW,
YOU'RE AQUA...DUCK.
AS MUCH AS I HATE
CRUSHED ICE...
THAT REALLY HIT THE SPOT.
O.K., LIQUIDATOR,
MAKE THE WATER
WET AGAIN,
OR I'LL SCOOP YOU
INTO SNOW CONES
FOR THE KIDS.
YOU ASKED FOR IT,
YOU GOT IT--
WET WATER.
QUICK,
INTO THE SEWER!
EVERYBODY KNOWS
ACTIVE BODIES
GET THIRSTIER QUICKER.
RUN!
WE GOT TO FIND A WAY OUT!
HEY, I DROPPED THIS TODAY.
I KNOW WHERE WE ARE.
HEY,
WHAT DO YOU KNOW?
A PINCKNEY FLANGE.
3/4, TOO.
MY CASH FLOW'S
DOWN THE DRAIN
UNLESS I GET
WATER FLOW.
KEEN DARE!
SPOT ME
A COLD ONE?
UH-UH. $2.00, PLEASE.
AH, $2.00.
A GIRL AFTER
MY OWN HEART.
BUT WATCH HOW
A SEASONED PRO OPERATES.
LET'S GET DANGEROUS.
GET AWAY FROM ME,
YOU SLIMY DRIPS!
TAKE HER
BACK TO THE FACTORY.
I COULD USE
ANOTHER ENTERPRISING
INDIVIDUAL.
FAT CHANCE,
MR. WATER HEAD.
YEAH, FAT CHANCE,
MR. WATER HEAD.
CONCRETE, SHMONCRETE.
THE LIQUIDATOR CONTINUES
GOING MILE AFTER MILE.
[CRACKLING]
OF COURSE,
MILEAGE...MAY...VARY.
THIS COULD BE HARDER
THAN YOU THOUGHT.
AAH!
TRY TO KIDNAP ME,
WILL YOU?
EAT SNEAKER!
[TOOT TOOT]
YOU'RE RIGHT, BINKIE.
IT DOES MAKE
A NICE CENTERPIECE.
MR. MALLARD,
COULD I GET
SOME SHOTS
OF YOUR PLUMBING
SPECTACULAR
FOR OUR
SWIMSUIT ISSUE?
GO AHEAD, MY GOOD MAN.
MONDO SPRINKLER SYSTEM,
MR. FIX-IT.
YEAH, AND I COULDN'T
HAVE DONE IT
WITHOUT
THAT PINCKNEY FLANGE
OR MY OLD PAL LIQUI.
♪ CHAMPION OF RIGHT ♪
♪ SWOOPS OUT
OF THE SHADOWS ♪
♪ DARKWING OF THE NIGHT ♪
♪ SOMEWHERE
SOME VILLAIN SCHEMES ♪
♪ BUT HIS NUMBER'S UP ♪
3, 2, 1!
♪ DARKWING DUCK ♪
♪ WHEN THERE'S TROUBLE
YOU CALL D.W. ♪
♪ DARKWING DUCK ♪
LET'S GET DANGEROUS.
♪ DARKWING DUCK ♪
DARKWING, DARKWING DUCK!
♪ A CLOUD OF SMOKE
AND HE APPEARS ♪
♪ THE MASTER OF SURPRISE ♪
♪ WHO'S THAT CUNNING
MIND BEHIND ♪
♪ THE SHADOWY DISGUISE ♪
♪ NOBODY KNOWS FOR SURE ♪
♪ THE BAD GUYS
ARE OUT OF LUCK ♪
♪ HERE COMES ♪
♪ DARKWING DUCK ♪
LOOK OUT!
♪ WHEN THERE'S TROUBLE
YOU CALL D.W. ♪
♪ DARKWING DUCK ♪
LET'S GET DANGEROUS!
♪ DARKWING DUCK ♪
♪ YOU BETTER WATCH OUT,
YOU BAD BOYS ♪
♪ DARKWING DUCK ♪♪
[RADIO]
IT'S ANOTHER HOT SCORCHER,
THE 25th DAY
OF THIS HEAT WAVE.
SPEAKING OF HOT,
HERE'S ANOTHER ONE
THAT'S BURNING
UP THE CHARTS.
[MUSIC PLAYS]
OOPS.
HOW GOES THE PLUMBING,
DRAKESTER?
UH, FINE, FINE.
THE ORIGINAL
MR. FIX-IT HAS IT
ALL UNDER CONTROL.
WHOA! HO HO!
HO HO!
[GASP]
WHOA HO HO HO!
IT LOOKS LIKE
YOU NEED A 3/4
PINCKNEY FLANGE.
DO I TELL YOU HOW
TO LAY SIDEWALKS?
COMING THROUGH.
NOTHING'S BETTER
FOR THE BEVERAGE BIZ
THAN A HEAT WAVE.
BUT WHY TAKE CHANCES?
HOW ABOUT
SOME COMPLIMENTARY
POTATO CHIPS, SIR?
COMPLIMENT-ERARY?
WHY, SURE.
[FIRE ALARM RINGS]
[COUGHING]
MINERAL WATER, $1.00 A CUP.
WHAT A BARGAIN!
SAY IT WITH ME.
WHAT A BARGAIN.
WHAT A BARGAIN.
NATURAL MINERAL WATER...
FROM THE TAP, NATURALLY.
BEHOLD, ONE AND ALL.
GASP IN AMAZEMENT
AT THE MASTERPIECE
OF A TRUE PLUMBING GENIUS.
UH! AAH!
GENIUS!
LOOKS LIKE
YOU COULD USE
A 3/4 PINCKNEY FLANGE,
DRAKEROO.
I KNOW THAT.
YOU THINK I WAS
BORN YESTERDAY?
I'VE GOT BUCKETS
OF FLANGES INSIDE.
LAUNCHPAD,
WHAT'S A PINCKNEY FLANGE?
OH, BOY!SOFT COPY
WITH TOM LOCKJAW.
AT THE EXPENSIVE
LA GRANDE YUPPE,
PATRONS FOUND THAT EVEN
THE RICH AND BEAUTIFUL
CAN'T ESCAPE THE PLAGUE
OF DISGUSTING WATER.
IT WAS HORRIBLE.
IT TASTED LIKE
MUSTY CORDUROY PANTS.
IT WAS MORE LIKE
SCORCHED INSECTS.
OR REALLY CHEAP
ZINFANDEL.
EWW.
EWW.
BUD FLOOD, OWNER OF
FLOOD WATER BOTTLING COMPANY,
IS A FOREMOST LEADER
IN WATER PHYSICS.
[FEEDBACK]
THE PROBLEM IS
BAD-TASTING MOLECULES
THAT HAVE BEEN AROUND
SINCE DINOSAUR DAYS
HAVE WORKED THEIR WAY
INTO THE REGULAR
WATER MOLECULES OF...
MOST OF MY COMPETITORS.
EWW! I WOULDN'T
WANT TO DRINK THOSE.
[APPLAUSE]
[CHEERING]
AND WITH BUD FLOOD
SPARKLING CRYSTAL-PURE
FLOOD WATER,
I'LL NEVER HAVE TO.
♪ IT TASTES
SO GOOD ♪
♪ WE THINK
YOU OUGHTER ♪
♪ DRINK SPARKING
CRYSTAL-PURE FLOOD WATER ♪♪
AHH.
THAT MAY BE,
BUT OFFICIALS SUSPECT
SOMEONE'S BEEN BEFOULING
OUR BOTTLED WATERS.
BEFOULED? NOBODY BEFOULS
THE DRINKING WATER
OF ST. CANARD
WHILE I'M AROUND.
THIS IS A JOB
FOR DARKWING DUCK!
THIS IS A JOB
FOR LAWRENCE OF ARABIA.
I'LL SAY. IT'S HOTTER
THAN A MONKEY'S UNCLE.
LET'S STOP BY
BEVERAGE KING.
THEY'VE GOT
LOTS OF DRINKS.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN,
EVERYTHING'S SOLD OUT?
EVERYTHING
THAT DOESN'T
TASTE LIKE MUD.
IT SEEMS BUD FLOOD'S WATER'S
STILL A HOT SELLER,
AS WELL AS OUR FAVORITE,
CUCKOO FIZZY WATER.
ONE OF THEM WILL BE
THE NEXT BOTTLER
BLIGHTED BY THIS
BEVERAGE-BEFOULING BANDIT.
SLOP, SLOP, FIZZ, FIZZ.
I AM THE TERROR
THAT FLAPS IN THE NIGHT.
I'M THE PARKING METER
THAT EXPIRES WHILE YOU SHOP.
I AM DARKWING DUCK!
IT'S BUD FLOOD!
♪ BUD, BUD, BUD,
BUDDY FLOOD ♪♪
THAT'S RIGHT, LAUNCHPAD.
FLOOD'S BEEN POLLUTING
HIS COMPETITORS' WATERS
SO HIS ALONE WILL BE
THE ONLY DRINKABLE DRINK.
IT'S THE ULTIMATE
IN ADVERTISING.
WOULD YOU RATHER DRINK
MY PURE MOUNTAIN MAGIC
OR A BIG, FAT
MONKEY BRAIN?
HMM. YOUR MOUNTAIN
MAGIC, OF COURSE,
BUT YOU'RE STILL
GOING UP THE RIVER,
MR. TASTE...
AAH!
TEST.
HELP ME!
I'M MELTING!
DON'T BE SUCH A BABY, FLOOD.
IT'S ONLY...
WATER.
WHERE DID HE GO?
CASES ARE
SO MUCH EASIER
WHEN THE BAD GUY
OFFS HIMSELF.
[RADIO]
AFTER 26 DAYS
OF THIS HEAT WAVE,
WE'RE STRUGGLING
TO KEEP OUR LAWNS ALIVE.
SPEAKING OF LAWNS,
HERE'S DARLIN',
I LAWN FOR YOU.
MR. MUDDLEFOOT,
I'M FROMBETTER THAN YOUR
HOME AND GARDEN MAGAZINE.
COULD I PHOTOGRAPH
YOUR SPRINKLER SYSTEM
FOR OUR COVER?
SURE THING, SPUD.
KNOCK YOURSELF OUT.
OH, A PLUMBING
SPECTACULAR
TO RIVAL THE
IMPERIAL FOUNTAINS
OF SODA JERK. OOH!
I'VE GOT YOUR PLUMBING
SPECTACULAR RIGHT HERE.
GET A LOAD OF THIS!
COME ON, COME ON.
WHOOSH, WHOOSH,
WATER, SPLASH. LET'S GO!
HAVE YOU TRIED
A PINCKNEY FLANGE?
I DON'T NEED
NO PINCKNEY FLANGE.
I'M HANDY.
I'M RESOURCEFUL.
I'M AMBIDEXTROUS.
COWABUNGA!
PPOUUKK!
I'M...
GOING SHOPPING.
PLUMBER JUNCTION,
DRAINS "R" US,
INTERNATIONAL
HOUSE OF HOSE.
YOU'D THINK
SOMEBODY WOULD CARRY
A 3/4 PINCKNEY FLANGE.
HEY!
WHAT'S GOING ON?
WHO ARE YOU?
♪ WHAT'S GOING ON HERE?
WHO COULD HE BE? ♪
[HUMMINGBATTLE HYMN
OF THE REPUBLIC]
I WAS A MEAGER BUT BRILLIANT
BOTTLED WATER SALESMAN
IN THE BEAUTIFUL BURG
OF ST. CANARD.
♪ SAINT, SAINT, SAINT,
ST. CANARD ♪
ENOUGH OF THIS
SONG AND DANCE!
YOU MEAN YOU'RE--
CORRECTION--
IWAS BUD FLOOD...
♪ BUD, BUD, BUD,
BUDDY FLOOD ♪
BEFORE YOU
MERCILESSLY THREW ME
INTO THAT CONTAMINATED
VAT OF WATER.
THREW YOU?
YOU FELL INTO THE VAT.
I WASN'T RESPONSIBLE.
WE EVEN
TRIED TO SAVE YOU.
NEVERTHELESS,
I BECAME THE NEW
AND IMPROVED MASTER
OF ALL LIQUIDS--
THE LIQUIDATOR.
♪ HE'S WET
AND HE'S COOL ♪
♪ HE'S REALLY HIP ♪
♪ HE MAY BE MADE OF WATER ♪
♪ BUT HE'S NO DRIP ♪
♪ DOO WAH ♪
HAVEN'T YOU HEARD?
THE WET LOOK IS OUT.
EWW!
YECCHH!
ARE YOUR MUSCLES
SORE, TIRED, ACHING?
TRY LIQUIDATOR BRAND
DEEP HEATING RUB.
OOH, WATER.
I'M REALLY SCARED.
YEOW! THAT'S HOT!
NOT JUST HOT,
BOILING!
♪ BOILING WATER ♪
♪ THAT STUFF'S HOT ♪
♪ LIKE A BIG RED
LOBSTER IN A POT ♪♪
AHH...
LOOKS LIKE THIS DUCK'S
GOOSE IS COOKED.
HERE IN ST. CANARD'S SEWERS,
WE'VE SURROUNDED
A LOCAL CRIME FIGHTER
WITH A WALL
OF BOILING WATER.
D.W.?
D.W.?
♪ DARKWING DUCK ♪
AAH! LOBSTER WOMEN!
NEVER MIND
THE SEAFOOD.
YOU SQUISHED
THE BAD GUY.
I--I DID?
GRRRRRR!
THIS IS NO ORDINARY
PUDDLE OF WATER.
GRRRRRR!
GRRRRRR!
PURSUE THAT
PERPETRATING PUDDLE.
COME ON!
AH HA HA HA HA HA!
AH HA HA HA HA HA HA!
FOLLOW THAT PIPE!
♪ FOLLOW THAT PIPE ♪
GO ON, GET OUT.
GET OUT.
OW!
THERE.
ALL WE GOT TO DO IS
TRACK THIS PIPE TO ITS END,
AND WE'LL HAVE HIM.
THE ST. CANARD WATERWORKS!
DON'T WORRY. LITTLE DOES
THE DEMENTED DRIP KNOW
HE'S MATCHING WITS WITH
THE PRINCE OF PLUMBING.
HEY!
WHAT THE...
WHAT'S GOING ON
OUT THERE?
THE FEATHERED FAVORITE
EASILY FOILS
THE FIENDISH FLUID'S
FELONIOUS FLIGHT.
BUT LOOK WHAT YOU DID
TO THE WATERWORKS.
IT MAY NOT LOOK GREAT,
BUT THERE ARE NO LEAKS.
WHO'D THINK STOPPING A
WATERY VILLAIN WAS SO HARD?
HARD? DARKWING DUCK,
YOU'VE GIVEN ME
A STUNNING SLANT
FOR MY NEW
ADVERTISING CAMPAIGN--
HARD WATER!
HUH?
BINKIE, WE GOT A PROBLEM.
THISIS HARD WATER.
AS IS ALL THE WATER
IN ST. CANARD.
SO HAVE A DRINK...
ON ME.
AAH!
AAH!
AAH!
GEE, THIS WATER'S
NOT HARD.
♪ WE CAN DRINK THE BAY,
NYAH NYAH ♪♪
OH, NO, YOU CAN'T.
WELL, THIS IS
HIGHLY UNUSUAL.
WE'RE STUCK!
I KNOW.
ARE YOU DRY, PARCHED,
CRAVING SOMETHING
WET AND WILD?
CAN'T SEEM
TO QUENCH YOUR THIRST
WITH ORDINARY TAP RUBBER?
TRY SPARKLING CRYSTAL-PURE
FLOOD WATER,
NOW ON SALE FOR
THE UNBELIEVABLY LOW PRICE
OF $5,000 A BOTTLE.
[GULP]
AHH!
IT'S GOOD.
DARKWING DUCK'S
FAITHFUL SIDEKICK
VAINLY ATTEMPTS
TO FREE HIMSELF
OF THE RUBBERY BLOB
WHICH WAS AUDUBON BAY.
LUCKILY, OUR FLAPPING TERROR
POSSESSES THE VERY LATEST
IN CRIME-BUSTING TECHNOLOGY--
A 200-HORSEPOWER THING CUTTER.
ADIOS, THING CUTTER.
WHERE ARE WE GOING?
JUST FOLLOW ME.
UHH! UHH!
UHH! UHH!
GEE, D.W.,
MAYBE IT'S NOT
THE BEST DAY
TO GO BOUNCING
UP A 95-STORY
BUILDING.
96. WE WON'T
BE BOUNCING LONG.
THE IMPACT SHOULD SHATTER
THE HARDENED WATER.
NOW, ON MY COMMAND--
HOPE THIS DOESN'T HURT--
JUMP!
WHOA!
OHH!
AAH!
AAH!
IT HURT.
LAUNCHPAD,
WE'RE GOING TO VISIT
THE LIQUIDATOR'S
BOTTLING FACTORY.
BUT FIRST, I THINK
I'VE GOT A WAY
TO BEAT THIS HEAT.
HA HA HA!
MY MINERAL WATER
IS SELLING
LIKE HOT CAKES.
I AM THE TERROR
THAT FLAPS IN THE NIGHT.
I AM THE SOAP SCUM
THAT LINES YOUR BATHTUB.
I AM--
HA HA HA HA!
OH, I LOVE YOUR
NEW SUMMER COSTUME.
THANK YOU, MR. DUCKWELL.
SO NOW WE'RE
FASHION EXPERTS, ARE WE?
I'M SORRY.
YOU REMIND ME
OF MY COUSIN MORTY
IN THAT GETUP.
GIRLS WOULD NEVER
TALK TO HIM.
AHA, BUT MORTY PROBABLY
WASN'T VERY HANDY WITH...
A COMMON CLEANING SPONGE!
[GASP]
AWAY GOES LIQUI,
DOWN THE DRAIN.
NOW, LAUNCHPAD! NOW!
HEY! WHAT THE...
I AM THE TERROR
THAT FLAPS IN YOUR PIPES.
I'M THE HAIRBALL
THAT CLOGS YOUR DRAIN.
I AM THE ORIGINAL MR. FIX-IT!
AND YOU'RE
IN HOT WATER, LIQUI.
L.P., STEAM HIS COLLAR.
TEMPERATURE GOING UP.
HEH HEH.
WHOA.
AHH, EVAPORATION DOES
SUCH WONDERS FOR MY SKIN.
REMEMBER WHEN YOU LEFT
THE EMPTY COFFEEPOT
ON THE BURNER?
I THINK
THIS IS WORSE.
[GASP]
[TOOT]
O.K., SO
I'M A LOUSY PLUMBER.
SO SUE ME, ALREADY!
I NEVER GET THAT
UNSIGHTLY SCORCHED LOOK.
LATER.
THE FREEZER.
THAT'S JUST DANDY.
LET'S SEE HIM
GET OUT OF THERE.
WELL, THAT'S CREATIVE.
UHH! IT'S LIKE
EATING SOUP WITH A FORK.
EVEN IN TEMPERATURES
OF 50-BELOW,
THE NEW IMPROVED
LIQUIDATOR
KEEPS ON RUNNING.
OR LURCHING SLUGGISHLY,
AS THE CASE MAY BE.
ONCE I THAW,
YOU'RE AQUA...DUCK.
AS MUCH AS I HATE
CRUSHED ICE...
THAT REALLY HIT THE SPOT.
O.K., LIQUIDATOR,
MAKE THE WATER
WET AGAIN,
OR I'LL SCOOP YOU
INTO SNOW CONES
FOR THE KIDS.
YOU ASKED FOR IT,
YOU GOT IT--
WET WATER.
QUICK,
INTO THE SEWER!
EVERYBODY KNOWS
ACTIVE BODIES
GET THIRSTIER QUICKER.
RUN!
WE GOT TO FIND A WAY OUT!
HEY, I DROPPED THIS TODAY.
I KNOW WHERE WE ARE.
HEY,
WHAT DO YOU KNOW?
A PINCKNEY FLANGE.
3/4, TOO.
MY CASH FLOW'S
DOWN THE DRAIN
UNLESS I GET
WATER FLOW.
KEEN DARE!
SPOT ME
A COLD ONE?
UH-UH. $2.00, PLEASE.
AH, $2.00.
A GIRL AFTER
MY OWN HEART.
BUT WATCH HOW
A SEASONED PRO OPERATES.
LET'S GET DANGEROUS.
GET AWAY FROM ME,
YOU SLIMY DRIPS!
TAKE HER
BACK TO THE FACTORY.
I COULD USE
ANOTHER ENTERPRISING
INDIVIDUAL.
FAT CHANCE,
MR. WATER HEAD.
YEAH, FAT CHANCE,
MR. WATER HEAD.
CONCRETE, SHMONCRETE.
THE LIQUIDATOR CONTINUES
GOING MILE AFTER MILE.
[CRACKLING]
OF COURSE,
MILEAGE...MAY...VARY.
THIS COULD BE HARDER
THAN YOU THOUGHT.
AAH!
TRY TO KIDNAP ME,
WILL YOU?
EAT SNEAKER!
[TOOT TOOT]
YOU'RE RIGHT, BINKIE.
IT DOES MAKE
A NICE CENTERPIECE.
MR. MALLARD,
COULD I GET
SOME SHOTS
OF YOUR PLUMBING
SPECTACULAR
FOR OUR
SWIMSUIT ISSUE?
GO AHEAD, MY GOOD MAN.
MONDO SPRINKLER SYSTEM,
MR. FIX-IT.
YEAH, AND I COULDN'T
HAVE DONE IT
WITHOUT
THAT PINCKNEY FLANGE
OR MY OLD PAL LIQUI.