Charlie's Angels (1976–1981): Season 5, Episode 9 - Taxi Angels - full transcript

Investigating a murder attempt at a small taxi cab company, Kelly reluctantly poses as a driver, Julie as the dispatcher and Kris as a roller-skating waitress at the local diner.

Once upon a time, there
were three beautiful girls.

Two of them graduated
from the police academy.

The other graduated from
a top school for models.

And they each reaped the rewards

of their exciting careers.

But I took them away from all
that and now they work for me.

My name is Charlie.

L-70, they're at Third and Main.

Couple going to airport.

T-36 go to Crest Hotel.

Pick fare in lobby.

F-24, pick up at 213 Elm Street.

Man wants the dog.

If you ask me, the train is
still the best way to travel.

Unless, of course, you
just don't have the time.

Then you have to fly.

Frankly, I prefer to fly
even when I have the time.

Which I don't have
very much of right now.

When we get to the
hotel, wait for me.

She'll be waiting in the lobby
and it will only be a minute.

Relax, buddy,

we'll get you there with
plenty of time to spare.

At least 30 seconds.

All right, wait for
me. I'll be right out.

Yeah. I'll be right over there

on that corner where
that kid's selling flowers.

Okay. I'll be right back.

Hey, Tom, move it there,
move it. Now, come on.

You know you're not
supposed to park there.

Sarge, I'm just gonna get
some flowers for Laurie.

I'll only be a couple seconds.

Seconds or hours or
minutes don't matter.

You know better. You're
not supposed to park there.

The law is the law.

I'll take my chances.

All right, Tom.

You break the law, you'll
pay. They're gonna tow you!


One of these days you're
gonna cut one too close.

No way, man. Because
I'm the Jammer, dig?

And the Jammer
always scores big.

How about helping me score big

with a dozen of
your best carnations?

Got you.

From my private stock.

Ah, beautiful.

Heh-heh. Later.

Aah! Tom!

Oh, my God.


But Tom will be all right?

The doctor says that if
Tom continues to improve,

he'll be out of
intensive care in a week.

It's a lucky thing he
bought you those flowers.


He was very lucky again.


There were other
incidents like this?

Yes, there have
been other incidents,

as the police call them.
But nothing like this.

Somebody's trying to
drive us out of the business.

Any idea who?


Tom and I have been
over the possibilities.

We keep coming up
with the same thing.

Nothing. Please,
will you help us?

Of course, we'll help you.

Laurie, why don't you
start at the beginning.

About a month ago,

we received a
threatening phone call.

He said he was gonna ruin
us just like he'd been ruined.

And then about a week later,

things started
happening to the cabs.

Tires blew, brakes failed.

In one cab, there
was this electrical fire,

and now, this explosion
that's almost killed Tom.

Did the bomb squad find
any clues in the wreckage?

That's what I want
you to find out.

Captain Brewster is willing
to share everything with us.

Okay, I'll call him right
now, set up an appointment.

You know, whoever
arranged all those incidents

must be very
mechanically inclined.

Sounds like we should get close

to some of the
mechanics and the drivers.

Captain Brewster,
please. Bomb squad.


Now, Kris, there's a restaurant

near the cab company garage.

A lot of the drivers
hang out there.

And everybody knows
cab drivers like to talk.

Especially to
attractive waitresses.

Heh-heh. I get
the idea, Charlie.

Uh, Charlie, shouldn't
we check out everybody

who had access to
Laurie and Tom's garage?

That's Julie's assignment.

You'll see her there, Kelly,
when you start your new job.

What new job?

Charlie. No.


That'll be 6.50.

Here you are. Keep
the change, mate.

You think we should
have this cleaned?

Oh, don't worry. It
will spend just fine.

What a way to start out.

Yeah, well, working
downtown, it's never dull.

I believe you.

Oh, wait a minute.
Maybe we better call first.

They might have a
fare for you. Oh, right.

This is 7310. I'm empty

at Meadow Woods
Studios. Come in.

Dispatch, come in.

Julie, it's Kelly.

Hi, Kelly, how are you doing?

Well, I just dropped
off my first fare.

You could definitely
say it was interesting.

Well, I got another one for you.

Mayfair Towers, 268 South 3rd.

The man will be
waiting in the lobby.

I'm on my way.

All right. That's a
double cheeseburger.

Uh, no fries and a coffee.

Yeah. Marian's got
us on another diet.

I guess in the past 20 years,

we must have lost
500 pounds between us.

Ha-ha! It must be hard.


I mean, I really
enjoy gaining it back,

know what I mean?

Hey, I hear I missed
all the excitement.

What excitement?

Wasn't one of your
company cabs blown up?

What about it?

According to the newspapers,

it's a real mystery. The
police can't figure out

why anybody would
wanna hurt the Archers.

Cops don't know
nothing about nothing.

I'll bet you know
a lot about a lot.

I know some things.

For instance, I know better
than to ask too many questions.

Uh, well, when
does a person know

when they get to that
one question too many?

I think you're just about there.

Why not? Apple pie?

Hey, what are you doing, lady?

What are you doing?

What does it look
like I'm doing?

I'm working on a cab. Why?

What's it to you? I'm
the new dispatcher.

If you're a mechanic,
why didn't you check in?

I didn't know there
was a new dispatcher.

Wait a minute, I don't answer
to no dispatcher anyway.

You answer to this dispatcher

about anything that has
to do with those cabs.

All right, lady,

I was working on
the transmission

because it wasn't
shifting right, okay?

Oh, yeah?

Well, I don't show a
work order on the cab.

That's because I was
just test driving the cab

and found out about
it just now, you know.

Hmm. What's your name?

My name?

Heh-heh. My name is Jake.

Jake. Jake Barnett.

Oh. Oh, yeah, there you are.

Ah. Julie Rogers.

Eh. How do you do?

Hey, I'm sorry about
screaming at you.

I'm new and with
all that's going on...

It's all right. I understand.

How about I buy you a
cup of coffee in the office?

No, I think maybe I
better get back to the cab.

Come on.

I wanna know how
this company works

and I've got a feeling you're
just the guy who can help me.

Come on.

Oh, I'll tell you what I can.



Kelly, this is Julie Rogers.

Nice to meet you, Kelly.

Hi. You must be the dispatcher.

I have a thing about voices.

This is our mechanic, Jake.

How are you? Nice to see you.

You must be the man who's
gonna take real good care of my cab.

Yes, ma'am, you bet.

Needs a good wash, Jake.

Well, I'll take care
of it right away.


What do you know about him?

He's a good mechanic.
Anything else I should know?

Laurie, this isn't the
time to be so trusting.

I guess you're right.

Julie, have you heard
from Kris and Bosley?

Yeah, they're gonna
meet us at the office.

In fact, we should get started.

I better go to the
hospital and see Tom.

Laurie, everything's
gonna be all right.

I know, Kelly. I
really do. Okay.

See you later.

You meet some interesting
people driving a cab.

For instance, I picked
up a 5-foot-4 ventriloquist

with a 6-foot-4 dummy.

I hope you charged two fares.

I couldn't. The
ventriloquist was sitting

in the dummy's lap.

Then there was this psychiatrist

who insisted on
laying in the back seat

and telling me all
of his problems.

Oh, no.

Heh-heh. Oh.

With all this, I didn't
turn up a single lead.

The police weren't
much help either.

The bomb squad thinks the device

was either in the
back seat or under it.

Anything on Tom's last fare?

Yeah, he checks out.

Uh, local businessman
meeting his girlfriend.

He just didn't
wanna get involved.

Hmm. Are you trying to say

that he didn't wanna
get his wife involved?


But I'm gonna
talk to him anyway.

What about witnesses?

Oh, there were plenty of
them, but no one saw anything.

Townsend Agency.

Oh, hi, Charlie.

Angels, are you there?

We're here, Charlie.

Did you come up with
anything on Jake Barnett?

Your mechanic is an
ex-boxer and an ex-Marine.

He has a reputation
as a tough guy.

No record?

Apparently not.

Bosley, I want you to go
over his military record,

especially the circumstances
of his discharge.

Right. And, Charlie,
if he is a boxer,

he's gotta be licensed.

Uh, I'll take a look through
the boxing commission's file.

You know, he mentioned
someone named Marian.

Could be an
ex-wife or a girlfriend.

I'll look for a
marriage license.

What about rival cab companies?

There's plenty of competition
for the downtown trade,

but so far, I can't
turn up anyone

hurting bad enough
to resort to violence.

Charlie, uh, did
you find anything

on that list of Archers'
former employees?

Not so far.

You know, this might
be the work of a crazy

who just doesn't like taxicabs.

That's true.

But even the most
unbalanced mind

has a logic all its own.

I know you're right.

It's just something
about this case.

Yeah, I've got a hunch that
we're overlooking something

that's gonna seem quite
obvious when it's all over.


Hello? Is someone there?

I said, is someone there?

Flowers, lady?

Oh, no, thank you.

What's your name?
They call me Jammer.

Why do they call you Jammer?

Because that's what
I'm training to be.

You are looking at
the next superstar

for the L.A. T-Birds. Ha-ha-ha!

Wow, the roller games.
You must be a great skater.

Only the greatest.


Hey, were you around
when Tom Archer got hurt?

Was I around?

I was the first one to
him after the explosion.

Oh, you saw it?

Yeah, he had just bought
some flowers from me.

You didn't see anybody messing
around with his cab, did you?

Why you wanna know?

Well, if anybody's messing
around with these cabs I drive,

I wanna know who it is.

I don't blame you.

Well, how about it?

Did you see anybody
do anything to Tom's cab?

Well, his fare got out.

Tom came over to my stand.

No, wait, the old
soldier, Sarge.

I saw him leaning into the cab
while Tom was coming toward me.

Now, you don't think that old
man put a bomb in the cab?

What do you think?

Well, everybody knows
he's a crazy old fool.

And he was the only one?

Yeah, I'm sure of it.

If you think of anything
and you can't find me,

one of the waitresses
at the drive-in

is a friend of mine.
Her name's Kris.


Uh, looks like I have to go.

Oy. What a town.

Don't none of you L.A.
cabbies ever cruise?

You have any idea
of the price of gas?

Hey, better than you do, lady.

I'm turning on the meter.

Wanna pay for talking or riding?

Where to?

Wherever. I wanna see this town.

Uh, just follow
the front of the cab.

I'll tell you where to turn.

Suit yourself, Mac.

Hey, that's my name.


Mac Gossett from the Bronx.

You're long way from
home, aren't you?

Yeah. I'm out here
on my vacation.

I just been seeing
that Olvero Street.

Heh-heh. You mean Olvera Street.

Olvera, Olvero, I don't know.

Why don't they use
numbers out here?

Kind of cute, isn't it?


How come everybody
out here talks like... 7?

Hey, buddy, would you
get the lead out, huh?

You drive like my mother!

What was I talking about?

Ha-ha. I think you
were just about to tell me

how you were enjoying
your vacation in L.A.

Oh, no, I wasn't
because I ain't.

How can anybody
live in this dump?

Manhattan. Now,
there's a place to live.

Did I tell you what
I do for a living?

I think you were just about to.

Yeah, I got my own
cab. A lot like this one.

I could tell you stories
about pushing a hack

that'd make your
hair stand on end.

Say, you got a minute?


Speak English?

Yeah, I speak English.

Thank God. Listen.

I got separated from my outfit
over that bridge. It was awful.

A lot of guys didn't
make it. I lost my rifle...


Wait! No, it's okay!

Oh, he thinks he's
in France, in the war.

Get down!

Tanks are coming! It's
okay, Sarge. Please!

It's not, they've got flame
throwers! Can't you see them?

But they're our tanks.

Our tanks? Are you sure?

Yeah, I'm sure.

You all right? He
didn't hurt you, did he?

No, no, thanks to Julie,
he didn't even hurt himself.

Does this happen
often? Too often.

That's not true. He just loses
touch every now and then.

Happened so often
that Tom fired him.

He ought to be back
in the veterans hospital.

Jake, that's enough.

You go get him something to eat.

Take him over to the
diner. Please, Jake.

Come on, Sarge. Come
on. We're going out on patrol.

Jake, I don't have my rifle.

You just take the point
and don't worry about that.

Poor man.

What did Jake mean
about Tom firing him?

We used to let Sarge
sweep up in the garage.

And he started having
these flashbacks,

I guess you'd call them.

Evidently he carries
a lot of guilt around

because he lost his
weapon in the battle

and somebody must
have died because of him.

Anyway, the flashbacks
started happening too often

and it disrupted the business.

Do you know his real name?

Master Sergeant William
Baker, U.S. Army, retired.

You don't think old Sarge...?

When did Tom fire him?

It was two weeks
before the thing started.

Yeah, it's a real art
getting out to Kennedy

in less than an hour.

You know, most people take
the Van Wyck Expressway.

That's where
there's a lot of traffic.

But I know this
terrific shortcut.

You may wanna remember
it in case you're ever there.

Let's say you're in Midtown,
Fifth Avenue and 42nd Street.

You go cross-town to
Third, then you go uptown.

You take the 59th Street
Bridge over to Queens.

Get off the bridge you're
at 22nd Street, right?

You take that. You follow it
out to Northern Boulevard,

and you go toward
Flushing Meadow

and you follow all
signs to the airport.

You got that? All right. Now,
I'm gonna give you La Guardia

because that's the tough one.

Oh, no, that's all
right. That's all right.

Hey, suit yourself.
I'm just trying to help.

Why can't I sweep up anymore?

Because you flip
out like you did today.

Nobody can trust you anymore.

But why? Why?

I didn't do anything bad.

You didn't see how scared that
new dispatcher was, did you?

I didn't mean to scare her.

I don't wanna hurt nobody.
I just want my job back.

Well, you can't have
it back. You're fired.

Listen, you just wait till
Tom gets out of that hospital.

You just wait. I'll talk to him.

Sarge, Tom is the
one who fired you.

He's not gonna change his mind.

Yes, he will. Yes, he will.

I want my job! I need my job!

You can't have it, Sarge.

They don't trust you.


They don't trust you either.

Sarge, what are
you talking about?

They don't trust you any
more than they trust me. Ha-ha.

How do you know that?

The other night, I went to
the garage to see Laurie,

she was too busy.

I hid behind the cabs.
I heard them talking.


Oh, Laurie and the dispatcher

and one of the
new drivers, a girl.

Kelly Garrett?

What did they say about me?

Oh, lots of things.

They said you were
a good mechanic

but they said Laurie, well,
maybe she was too trusting.

Did Laurie say she
thinks I want to hurt her?

Oh, no, nothing like
that. They didn't...

Just, well, she just seemed
kind of upset, though.

You know, what I think, Sarge?
I think that new dispatcher

and that new
driver could be cops.



Why? Because of
what happened to Tom?

Maybe they're
trying to put you back

in the V.A. hospital.

No, Jake. No, I ain't
going back there.

I ain't going back there!
Don't worry about it, Sarge.

Don't worry about it. I'm
not gonna let you go back.

I promise.

Well, you'll have to admit
the weather's beautiful here.

You actually like
the weather in L.A.?

Sure. What's wrong with it?

What's wrong with it?
What's wrong with it?

It never changes.

The palm trees
always look the same.

In New York, the
seasons always change.

You can always tell
what time of year it is.

I can drive by in my cab

and watch the
trees change color.

Look, L.A's not all palm trees.

This is a sightseeing
trip. Right?

Yeah. Right.

Why don't let me
show you around?

There's some old parts
of town up in the hills

where the trees change
colors. You're gonna love it.

I doubt it.

Would you at least try
to have an open mind?

All right. Lead on, Don Quixote.

See? Isn't it
beautiful around here?

It's okay.

But it never rains around here.

It does too.

Take it from me.

There is no place in
this world more beautiful

than New York City
after a rainstorm.

Listen, Mac, if New
York City is so great,

what are you doing out here?

Why don't you just go
home, take two weeks,

drive around in your own cab

and watch the
trees change colors?

What is it out here?

Ain't nobody out here
friendly in this town?

Gee whiz.

You talk about New Yorkers.
I can't believe you people.

Hey, where did
you learn to drive?

Hold on, Mac. We
don't have any brakes.

You're kidding.
No, I'm not kidding.

You're not kidding.

Look, you can let me
off anywhere along here.

Hey, are we in a
movie or something?


All right.





Are you okay? Yeah.

What? No guacamole dip?

Kelly, are you sure you're okay?

Oh, I'm fine. Really.
I did learn one thing.

That kid that sells flowers
down by Union Station

saw the old man, Sarge,
doing something to Tom's cab

right before it exploded.

Laurie told me
that Tom fired him

about two weeks
before the trouble started.

Is being fired really enough
reason to almost kill someone?

Kelly, he's a shellshock case.

This morning, I saw
him completely flip out.

He thought he was back in France

during the Second World War.

Then an hour
ago, Kris called me,

told me that Sarge and
Jake were having coffee.

She couldn't hear
what they were saying,

but he seemed pretty
upset. Right, Jake?

That's right.

I think we have a
number one suspect.

Laurie, what's wrong?

Ah. Oh, nothing is wrong.

Just that my husband's
in the hospital,

you and your fare
are almost killed,

and I'm scared to get in my cab.

And I wouldn't blame the drivers

if they never came
back to work again.

Oh, Laurie, don't cry.

We're making
progress. We really are.

You can't let him win
just because you quit.

It just feels like I
don't have much left.

If we're right, you
won't need much more.

Come on. Let me
take you home, okay?

As soon as I fill
out the police report,

I'll meet you at the office.


Laurie, wait a minute.

"I know who cut your brake line.

Meet me at the
drive-in in an hour."

Maybe the police
can lift some prints

from the paper or
identify the handwriting.

In less than an hour?

Oh, you're right. I'll
tell Kris you're coming.

Jake. You gotta promise me

that I won't have
to testify in court.

Testify? What are
you talking about?

Never mind that. I know
you and that Julie are cops.

Look, we're not cops.
We're private detectives.

Your note said you
had some information?

All right, just promise me

that you will keep my
name out of it, okay?

Well, I can't promise
you anything. But I'll try.

All right. Last night, I
went back to the garage.

I forgot my time card
and today is payday.

I heard a noise by the cabs,
so I decided to look around,

considering what's
been going on.

I heard a hood slam and Sarge
came up between the cabs.

I didn't think anything of it
until what happened today.

You didn't actually see
him tamper with the car?

No, I didn't actually see him.

But I'll tell you
something else.

Sarge was married. His
wife used to take care of him

when he came home
from the V.A. hospital.

He was married?

He was married.

But about two years ago,

his wife was killed
in a traffic accident.

She got hit by a cab.

I know he'd been acting crazy.

I knew something was
gonna happen to him.

Do you have any
idea where he lives?

Yeah. The last I
knew, he lived in a room

in a hotel over on Fifth Street.

Oh, God. He's a
good guy, it's just that...

Yeah, that he's sick
and he needs help.

Thanks to you he's gonna
get it before it's too late.

Yeah. Remember,
keep my name out of it.

On What's up?

Sarge's wife was
killed by a cab.

I think I know
where to find him.

Julie and Bos can meet us there.

Where's the phone?

Come on.

Sixth floor. Room 627.

You sure he's up there?

The desk clerk said he
hadn't been out all day.

Okay, where's Bosley?

He's checking the accident
report on Sarge's wife.

I don't think we ought to wait.

Julie and I will go up.
Maybe he'll talk to us.

I'll tell you what,
I'll go around back

and cover the fire
escapes, just in case.

Good idea. Okay.

Who is it?

It's Kelly and Julie
from the garage.

Let us in.

Sarge, wait!

Can you pick it?
Not fast enough.

Look out.

Kelly, above you.

He's heading for the roof.

Ah! Sarge, wait!

I only wanna talk to you.

No. No, I'm not going
back to that place!


Bos. Kris, what happened?

It's Sarge. He tried to
jump, but he didn't make it.

Oh, no. It wasn't him.

What? The story
that Jake gave Kelly

about the old man's
wife being killed

by being hit by a
cab. It wasn't true.

What wasn't true?

Sarge's wife didn't
get killed by a cab.

She died of a heart attack
in her sleep seven years ago.


You're saying Sarge
died for nothing?

Oh, God.

Yeah, we... We were wrong.

We were wrong.

Kelly, you're being
too hard on yourself.

There's no way anyone
could have predicted

the old man's behavior.

I shouldn't have been so
fast to believe Jake Barnett.

We all believed him.

Julie's right, Kelly.

We're all equally to blame.

It doesn't help.

I know what might help.

Nailing Jake Barnett.

Kelly, slow down.

If he's not guilty,
why did he lie to me?

He had the same opportunities

to sabotage the
cabs. More, in fact.

But why? What
would his motive be?

It's there. We
just can't find it.

Well, I've put together
an extensive file

on Jake Barnett and
he's never been arrested,

and his military
record is clean.

Well, can I see that?

Yeah. Sure.

You know, Kelly, there
is another possibility.

Which is that Jake
did not lie to you.

But told you exactly
what Sarge told him.

Why would Sarge
make up a story like that?

I don't know.

But anyone who has
flashbacks about the war

could well have hallucinations
about something else too.

There's nothing in
here about Jake's wife.

No, there's no record
of his ever being married.

Wait a minute. Wait a minute.

The first time I ever met Jake,

he mentioned a
woman named Marian.

What did he say? He said
something about a diet that...

That over the past 20 years

they probably lost
500 pounds together.

It certainly sounds like a man
talking about his wife to me.

Something's not right here.

Bosley, didn't
you compile a list

of all the accidents
involving the Archers' cabs?

Yes, I've got it right here.

Uh, there is a notation
made here of an accident

that happened two years ago

at the corner of First and Hill.

A woman was hit
and killed by a cab.

Her name was Marian Reed.

Does it list an address?

Yes. 2642 Carroll, Apartment 4.

It says right here

when Jake Barnett
renewed his driver's license

three years ago,

the address he gave was
2642 Carroll, Apartment 4.

So they were living together.

Why would he tell
me a story like that?

The truth had to come out.

He's crazier than
Sarge ever was.

And a lot more dangerous.

Well, I'd say that Jake
Barnett's our man, all right.

But we're gonna have to
catch him red-handed to prove it.

Huh, that's gonna be tough.
He knows we're on to him.

Well, we can't spend
the rest of our lives

protecting a cab company.

We won't have to.

What do you have in mind?

I think I'm gonna have a
little talk with Mr. Barnett.

What good would that do?

It depends on who's listening
to what we have to say.

Jake, something's
wrong with my cab.

Can you take a look?

What's the matter with it?

I don't know. The engine's
really running rough.

Why don't you take
a ride? You'll see.

Uh, so, what's
wrong with the cab?


I just wanted an excuse
to talk to you alone.

Talk to me? About what?

You know what about.

You mean about old Sarge?

It's over. He's dead.

I don't think it is over.

Why not?

Sarge's wife died seven
years ago in her sleep.

Why would he tell me
that she was hit by a cab?

I don't think he did.

I think maybe you'd better
stop this cab some place.

Yeah. How about
that parking lot?

Yeah, that'll be fine.

This could be it.

Jake, I know about Marian.

Marian? Don't you
even say her name.

She shouldn't be alone with him.

I'm gonna take a cab.
At least I'll be close by.


But I have to say her name.

I have to keep
saying Marian's name

until you admit the truth.

I didn't do anything.

Two years ago, Marian
was killed by a cab.

You were so full
of grief and anger

that you wanted to get
even with the cab company.

You got a job with them, so
you could figure out what to do.

You decided to put
them out of business.

You almost did that, Jake.

Almost? I did it.
They can't get drivers.

And the ones they do
have, nobody will ride with.

In a month, they'll be busted.

Wrong, Jake.
I'll drive for them.

I have friends that
will drive for them.

We're not gonna let you
put them out of business.

We're not gonna let you win.

Your friends might
not be so brave

if something happens to you.

Nothing's gonna happen to me.

Don't you be so sure.

Give up, Jake. They
taped the whole thing.

Wait, Jake.

What happened? Let
me drive. Move over.

7310, come in.

7310, come in, come in.

It's no use.

Cover the rear.

Drop it! Or you'll
go down with it!

Jake, please, there's
no place else to run.

According to people
who knew them, Angels,

Jake lived with Marian
Reed for more than 20 years.

It's amazing they never married.

Apparently, they
were more married

than most people who
have the piece of paper.

They must have been
very much in love.

I guess that's what
flipped him out.

Well, all I can say
is, I'm glad it's over.

Thanks to all of you.

Well, actually, Kelly
gets most of the credit.

Where did you learn
to drive like that?

Oh, I just sort of picked
it up along the way.

Not that kind of driving.

I'd bet you went to some
kind of driving school.

Well, to the tell you the
truth, I learned from this guy

I used to go out with him
in my old neighborhood.

You mean, you drove racing cars?

No. He drove stolen cars.