Charlie's Angels (1976–1981): Season 4, Episode 22 - Three for the Money - full transcript

The Townsend Agency is hired by three people who have been separately conned by Harley Dexter. In order to get they money back, the Angels counterattack with three cons of their own: one ...


CHARLIE: Once upon a time

there were three little girls
who went to the police academy.

One in Los Angeles.

One in San Francisco.

The other in Boston.

And they were each
assigned [BUZZING]

very hazardous duties.

But I took them
away from all that

and now they work for me.

My name is Charlie.

[♪♪♪]

[♪♪♪]

MAN: Money is what
matters, gentlemen.

And forever the bottom line is:

How much have I made for you?

You've done very well, Harley.

Thank you.

But now you have a United
States senator after you.

The people I answer to,

they don't like that.

I'm sure the senator
will have a price.

Everyone has a price.

Including you?

How perceptive of you.

You sell us out, you
get dead very quickly.

Gibel,

as a freelance employee
of your organization,

there might be profit
in my selling out,

but I'm aware of the
consequences of such a move.

[LAUGHS]

You're a man who
understands his place

in the scheme of things, Harley.

You need money laundered?
I take it into Mexico for you.

And I have provided that
service for our mutual profit

with every penny accounted for.

[DOOR OPENS]

Caught this guy
sneaking around out back.

Mr. Lloyd.

[CHUCKLES]

What are you doing here?

What am I doing here?

I'm here for the $65,000
that you stole from me.

That's what I'm doing here.

Gentlemen, this is Mr. Lloyd,

we were together in that
land venture I told you about.

You picked me clean.

My garage, everything I own,

it's all gone. You stole it.

Mr. Lloyd, I lost a great deal
of my personal funds myself.

Did you?

You cheated me.

You cheated me.

And I'm gonna make a
big loud stink about that.

You see, I know that some
U.S. senator's investigating you,

I think I'll go talk to him.

Mr. Gibel, would you be
good enough to show Mr. Lloyd

how foolish a move like that
would be? Get him outta here.

You... Come on.

[SHOUTING INDISTINCTLY]

Some sucker you burned
on a short con, Harley?

Well, one likes to
keep one's hand in.

Mm-hm. What you
do outside of our deal

is your business. Indeed it is.

There's something you should
know to put your mind at ease.

I am setting up a con

to finance the
buying of the senator.

You're saying you can
buy Senator Langston?

What am I known for, De Sousa?

Money, and the
ability to get it.

Beautiful women, and
the ability to get them.

Now I've got a shot
at a U.S. senator.

I owe it to my
reputation to give it a try.

[TAKES DEEP BREATH]

Meanwhile, back to business.

When do I leave for Mexico?

[♪♪♪]

BOSLEY: Professor
Joan McKendrick

and Mrs. Pattison
are here, Charlie.

CHARLIE: Good.
Has Tiffany arrived yet?

No, not yet, but she
should be here momentarily.

Mr. Lloyd, our other client,

is instructing Tiffany
in the tricks of his trade.

Fine.

Now, Bosley, you have
Mr. Dexter's dossier there.

We're about to con Mr. Dexter,

just as he conned
our three clients.

LLOYD: Tiffany,
I... I still think

that I oughta do it.

Mike, you can't go crawling
under cars with that on.

Mrs. Pattison, uh,
this is Tiffany Welles.

Hi... Oh. How do you do?

[CHUCKLES DRYLY]

She'll be posing as
Senator Langston's

political aide?

Well, as soon as I peel
off these overalls, I will.

Excuse me a minute.

Don't worry, Mrs. Pattison,

I've made arrangements
with the senator's people.

Our Mr. Dexter is in
for quite a surprise.

Now, Mrs. Pattison,

you lost exactly
$100,000, is that correct?

Yes.

That was nearly all my
husband left me when he died.

Unlike some politicians,
he was never a rich man.

Professor McKendrick,
how much did you lose?

Seventy-five thousand.

I am a most learned fool.

And a very silly woman.

With Mr. Lloyd's 65,

that comes to nearly, uh, a
quarter of a million dollars.

Mine was supposed to
be a matching investment

in oil-rich lands.

There's more oil in my garage.

So, Charlie, their
quarter of a million

became Mr. Harley
Dexter's quarter of a million.

Not very nice, but very neat.

Kris, did you find, uh,

a matching Rolls-Royce
for Mr. Dexter?

Abercrombie and Son on Wilshire.

Good. That sets up
our Rolls-Royce con.

Charlie, I, uh,

have quite a rap sheet
here on Mr. Harley Dexter.

It appears that he's working
with the Eastern Syndicate.

He's a man of... two passions.

Swindling is one.

I'll give you the traditional
three guesses as to the other.

Charlie, do you suppose
that Tiffany, Kelly or myself

would qualify for
Mr. Dexter's other passion?

My dears, whyever do you
think we're in this business?

Well, how do I
look, Mrs. Pattison?

Am I politically
volunteerish enough?

My dear, you are perfect.

Forgive me, but I don't
quite understand any of this.

Well, Professor McKendrick,

we're trying to get
your money back,

and we're dealing
with a devious man.

So we will have to
deal in devious ways.

You will be part of it.

Now, ladies and gentlemen,

we're setting up three cons.

Kelly will go to Mexico
with the professor

and interest
Mr. Dexter in some, uh,

fabulous Mayan art.

Meanwhile, Kris will pick
up a Rolls-Royce and...

And Mr. Lloyd and Tiffany
will be at a fundraising affair

for Senator Langston.

It's gonna be sort of
a four-pronged attack.

And believe me, we're
looking forward to it.

Three cons for the
master con man, Angels.

Remember, Dexter is amoral,

he doesn't know
right and wrong exist.

This man can
kill, and I mean it.

So watch yourselves.

[♪♪♪]

[PHONES RINGING] [CHATTERING]

You see Senator Langston?

Yeah, he's cruising around.

Hey, that was some speech.

I thought he was
gonna point right at you

when he attacked organized
wolves in sheep's clothing.

Luckily he hasn't
mentioned me by name.

I better get to him
before he does.

Be sure you do.

[♪♪♪]

Hello. Hi.

You look kind of lonely
standing over here.

Just catching my breath.

I'm Tiffany Welles, one
of the senator's aides.

I'm, uh, Fred Dawgins.

No, you're not. I'm not?

You're Harley Dexter.

Oh. Well, don't you think
you can get into trouble

talking to me?

Senator asked me to.

Oh, come on, you're kidding.

I'm not kidding.

Despite what he says
about you publicly,

the senator finds
you rather dynamic.

I would love to be
convinced of that.

How about later
over a bottle of wine?

Sounds inviting.
It was meant to be.

Was it? Yeah.

Really?

Here's my card.

And meanwhile... Hi, Denny.

Meanwhile, whatever
the senator says tonight,

he wants you to know privately

that he could be open for...

a campaign contribution.

Oh. Oh, I, uh, I
see what you mean.

Good.

[CROWD TALKING EXCITEDLY]

Do you know part
of being a good aide

is knowing when to disappear?

Senator Langston,
I just wanna say

what a pleasure
it is to meet you.

Well, you certainly have
nerve coming here, Dexter.

Like it or not, Senator, I
am a member of your party.

Not for long.

They don't let
people vote in prison.

With all respect to
your high office, senator,

I'm... I'm in real estate,

I'm just a businessman.

And I, sir, am the tooth fairy.

Let's go.

Very funny man, senator.

That's... That's what the
country needs, humor.

How much this trip?

One million dollars.

I read about what
Senator Langston

had to say about you, Dexter.

I'm handling it.

Trust me.

I trust you as much as I
can trust any other man

with a $100,000 getaway
fund tucked away in a safe.

Now, how did you
know about that?

I make it my business to know.

It's something I put
aside for a rainy day.

It don't rain much in
Southern California.

I've never let you or your
associates down, De Sousa.

There's no need to threaten me.

Just trying to keep you
on your toes, Dexter.

Dexter?

Professor McKendrick
is here to see you.

Excuse me.

[♪♪♪]

Very pretty.

Both of us lost a
great deal of money

on that oil land in which
we involved ourselves.

Do you know my business still
hasn't recovered from the blow?

I've stumbled
across a way for us,

not only to recoup our losses,

but make a sizeable
profit as well.

What? Selling archaeology books?

I've recently returned
from a dig in Mexico.

While there, I was
approached by a young lady

who is the spokesperson
for a group who,

I use her phrase,

"Have come into possession of"

a truckload of Mayan artifacts

as grand as any you see here.

You mean, she stole them?

I saw no need to
press her for detail.

Yeah, that... That
is gauche, isn't it?

Uh, go on.

The young lady is
quite, quite attractive,

though rather headstrong.

You mean she needs
gentle persuasion.

And, of course, you are
very good at persuasion.

As you said before,
we both lost on that deal.

At any rate, as I said,

her companions are rough,
silent, threatening types.

But I tell you, they don't
know what they have.

They only want
$100,000 for the lot.

Harley, what they have
rivals anything yet discovered.

I give you my word.

My word, they could be
sold to collectors or museums

for 7-even 800,000 dollars,

at the very least.

So why do you need me?

I can only raise 25,000
of the asking price.

Also, I have no means
of transporting the artifacts

into the United States.

Um.

What you're suggesting
is illegal, of course.

Yes.

But I'm a desperate woman.

Twenty-five percent
of what we realize

would set me up for life.

Your loss was greater than mine.

So I thought we might share...

similar sentiments.

I don't know, I
might. I'd, uh...

Well, I'd have to
authenticate these art pieces

before purchase, of course.

I know a man in South
America who could do it, Alvarez.

Oh, I think I'd rather
choose my own expert.

What about, uh...

What about the man
who wrote this book?

Dr. Martin Augsburg.

He looks trustworthy,
don't you think?

Says here he
lives in Mexico City.

Uh... him.

If you insist.

Uh, just give me a few
days in Mexico to, uh,

attend to some business
of my own and, uh,

that'll also give
my associates here

time to assemble my
share of the money,

then, uh, come to
my house in Mexico.

Okay?

Here's the address.

And I'll arrange for
Dr. Augsburg to meet us there.

Thank you, Harley.

Thank you, professor.

[♪♪♪]

GIBEL: Hey, margaritas.

Your professor's here.

Okay. Augsburg should
be here any minute.

What about the money?

Well, it got
laundered pretty good.

All nice, old,
untraceable bills,

packed in the Rolls.

Uh-huh. And, uh,

who has the
connections to do that?

You do. Keep that in mind.

Now, did you get a telephone
call from Los Angeles?

Oh, yeah, that,
uh, Tiffany Welles,

she works for
Langston all right,

been with him about a year.

Okay.

Here's her card.

Send a dozen
roses to that address.

No, no, no.

Daisies. Fresh, original,
dripping in innocence.

I'll get that senator
off my back.

Send her the daisies,

and I'll give you a note
to have her at the house

the day we get back.
Now, what about the 75,000

I need for my deal
with the professor?

Oh, they're still
working on that but, uh,

you'll have it by
the end of the week.

[CAR APPROACHES]

There's another car.

Funny-looking guy talking
to Professor McKendrick.

It's Augsburg.

Oh, if this works,
and it will...

You know what that means, Gibel?

Power.

I mean, I've owned a
lot of things in my life,

but the idea of actually
possessing a U.S. senator.

Now, that I find intriguing.

Well, as long as it doesn't

mess up our associates
back home, huh?

Okay, come on, show them in.

And then go buy the truck.

Oh, and Gibel? Yeah?

We're in a foreign country,

don't steal the truck, buy one.

[SNAPS]
[♪♪♪]

Professor McKendrick,
Dr. Augsburg,

welcome.

Would you care for a margarita?

Mm, don't mind if I do.

BOSLEY: Mr. Dexter,

this is Mayan culture
in its finest hour.

Invaluable.

You're holding that upside down.

Oh.

Oh, yes, yes.

What's this junk made
of, plaster of Paris?

Marvelous.

Marvelous.

But we agreed we'd make the
exchange at the end of the week.

Look, just hold your horses.

My friends and I are
gettin' a might nervous.

We been sittin' on this stuff
nearly two weeks already.

Bruno over there says
he got somebody else

who might be
interested, so, I...

But I won't have the money
until the end of the week.

And whose problem is that?

Mine or yours?

Excuse me.

Well?

Mr. Dexter, you have
a gold mine here.

Do you think they're
worth, uh, 7-800,000?

[SCOFFS]

I think that is a
conservative estimate.

But she wants the deal today.

I can have my money
ready in two hours.

Is two hours agreeable?

Two hours is about all
the time you gonna get.

Wait a minute, my
share is still in L.A.

Oh, but I thought...

But without the entire
hundred thousand...

What... What'll we do now?

All right.

All right, maybe there is a way.

I, uh... I might be able to
put my hands on the cash.

Good.

I knew if anybody
could come through,

it'd be Harley Dexter.

How do you know who I am?

You got quite a reputation.
Even around these parts.

A real wheeler-dealer.

Uh, say...

Uh, do you think
you might have a job

in that organization of yours?

Uh, I'm a lady who'll do
what she has to to turn a buck

but, uh, working
with those cowboys,

it's the pits.

Well, you got some
rough edges, don't you?

I'm just me. So
what do you think?

I'm thinking it
doesn't come free.

What does?

It's possible we can
work something out.

Uh, depending on what
you're willing to do for me.

[CHUCKLES]

You mean, uh, right here, now?

Of course not.

Oh.

Hey, now.

Uh, I ain't been
turned down too often.

Neither have I. It's
just that the professor

put me in a small bind
with this two hour limit,

I mean, it's nothing
I can't handle,

but I think I have to
teach her a lesson

and I'm gonna
need you to help me.

Sounds to me like
you're gonna double cross

that poor little lady.

Yeah, it does sound
that way, doesn't it?

[♪♪♪]

[LAUGHS]

I just heard on the radio
you've had it, buddy.

Langston had a press conference,

he's going after your tail.

I'm taking care of that.

With daisies you're
taking care of it?

Forget it, it's
being taken care of.

Did Dr. Augsburg leave?

Yeah, he... He left.

Wait a second,
you can't do that,

that's De Sousa's money.

I'm borrowing 75,000,

I'll replace it with the
cash I've raised in L.A.

De Sousa's not gonna like it.

Then let's not tell him and
save all that displeasure.

Did you get the truck?

Yeah. It's out back.

All right. Put this away.

And do try to be careful.

You're the one that
better be careful.

Gibel, I know what I'm
doing, I'm on a streak,

and when you're on a
streak, you ride with it.

Right?

[♪♪♪]

Okay, uh... Oh, do
you have your share?

Yes, right here.

You'll understand if
I insist on seeing it.

Now, listen, I don't
have time to play games,

we're dealing with
some very rough people

and they're smart, they
may try and cross us.

That had occurred to me.

And what do you suggest?

Okay, we go to the
rendezvous separately,

you in your car,
me in the truck,

you make sure they've got
the goods and it isn't a trap,

then, uh, you signal me, uh,

I drive up and we
make the exchange.

I don't know, what
if there is trouble?

Gibel and I will be covering
you from a safe distance away.

I mean, th... You won't see us,

but we'll be there.

But... I have three times
as much to lose as you do.

This way we can
protect this investment.

All this intrigue is
beyond me, I'm afraid.

Let's get it over with
as quickly as possible.

Whatever you say, professor.

[♪♪♪]

It's all here.

It's gonna be sad times

when the lady professor
gets to the other rendezvous

and finds out she's
all by her lonesome.

I can handle her.

I'll tell her we were
ambushed on the way

and the art was stolen.

I'll even have a bump
on my head to prove it.

When are you leaving for L.A.?

Well, as soon as I split with
those two stooges over there.

You and I are gonna have a
very interesting relationship.

Yeah?

Well, uh, I never
done nothing, uh,

real kinky.

[CHUCKLES]

[STARTS ENGINE]

What's the matter?

Charlie called.
There's a problem.

It's rumored that Dexter
has $100,000 cash

stashed somewhere in
case things get too hot.

Then that'll have to be
the money he gives Tiffany.

Yeah, but the point is,

will he be secure enough
at that point to risk it?

Or will he run?

I see what you mean.

[SIGHS]

They weren't there,
Harley, and neither were you.

What happened?

All right, calm down, will ya?

I find your actions
highly suspicious.

There was nothing I could do.

I thought they might try
to cross us and they did.

Only they were
smarter than I thought.

Tell me what happened.

[SIGHS]

We were following
you, as we planned,

well back, but
keeping you in sight.

They ambushed
us after you passed.

Gibel put up a fight,
he's in the hospital.

All I got was a
bash on the head.

And the money?

What about the money?

It's gone.

And they still
have the artifacts

to sell to someone else.

Don't look at me
like that, you're...

You're not the one
who got beat up.

That money was everything I had.

Everything.

You know,

I don't think we should do
any more business together.

We just don't make
a very lucky team.

I agree.

I'm sorry I got you involved.

Oh, that's all right, professor.

I'm a forgiving man.

[♪♪♪]

[EXHALES]

All arranged? All arranged.

Truckload of that art stuff will
go across the border tonight,

I'll be in L.A. tomorrow.

Rotten, Harley.

Hey, the professor
should've known better

than to try something
crooked like that.

McKENDRICK: I never
thought I'd see my 75,000 again.

Well, there you go.

[LAUGHS]

I don't know how to thank you.

You put it over, professor.

Absolutely. You know,

you could've been
a terrific actor.

As a matter of fact,
at school I did perform

with the Gilbert
and Sullivan Troop.

No kidding, so did I.

♪ Ah, take one
consideration With another ♪

♪ With another ♪

♪ A policeman's lot
Is not a happy one ♪

♪ When constabulary
duties To be done ♪

♪ To be done ♪

♪ A policeman's lot
Is not a happy one ♪

♪ Happy one ♪

[♪♪♪]

[♪♪♪]

You understand that
Abercrombie's, as a rule,

wouldn't handle such an item.

My father would murder me

if he even knew I was discussing
such a thing with a customer.

But you do have one?

Uh, yes, uh, a trade-in.

A rather well-known
pop star owned it.

I don't for the moment
recall his name, uh,

the skinny one who
wouldn't wear proper shirts.

Do you think we could see it?

Yes.

Out back, hm?

I understand he used to break
his guitars during his concerts.

He treated his automobile in
the same disgusting manner.

Well, it needs a new paint job.

Upholstery could
use some stitching,

he's got some, uh,
some minor metal work.

The real horror is
under the bonnet.

How could anybody
do that to a car?

To a Rolls.

No servicing at all
that we could discover.

How much?

It is, of course, difficult
to price a Rolls-Royce

no matter its, uh, condition.

We would find this
figure acceptable.

This would come out
of Dexter's pocket?

That's the plan.

Okay, it's a deal.

That's a lot of
money for a used car.

Madam, this is not a "used car."

This is a previously
owned British motor vehicle.

[♪♪♪]

KRIS: Hi.

Hi.

Well, I love your used car.

LLOYD: It's not an exact
duplicate of Dexter's Rolls,

some of the upholstery and
fittings we had to scrounge up.

Yeah, if they look too closely,

we're sunk before
we get out of port.

Well, then, we'll
have to make sure

they're too busy to notice.

Why is Dexter coming
home three days early?

He must've heard
about the injunctions

Senator Langston slapped
on all his financial transactions.

Cash flow interruptus, too bad.

Where is he now?

Uh, north of San Diego by now.

Okay. We better get this
hunk of junk on the road.

Drive carefully.

[♪♪♪]

Beautiful car.

Would be nice if it ran.

Oh, you are so hard to please.

Bye. Bye-bye.

Bye.

DEXTER: Can't we appeal?

How long will it take?

I don't have a week.

How could he get away with this?

How could he tie up
my money like this?

[SIGHS] All right,
all right, look.

Look, there's something else.

I have a truck arriving
at the warehouse today,

I want it and its
contents guarded.

Right.

Stay on top of that
appeal, will you?

I'll be in touch. What now?

I don't have to deliver De
Sousa's money for three days.

If I have to, I can use the
Mayan stuff as collateral.

What about your getaway fund?

I'm not touching that.

I, uh... I thought you
were working on Langston.

I am, I am. Where's your faith?

It ain't in daisies,
I'll tell you that.

[CHUCKLING]

[♪♪♪]

Pull over.

Hi. Hi.

What's the trouble?

[SIGHS]

I don't know, it just died.

You got a good taste in cars.

[CHUCKLES] Yeah, you too.

I was driving to Los Angeles

to go to my 10th high
school class reunion.

I wanted to show
them that the girl voted

"least likely to
succeed" did anyway.

Now what am I gonna do?

Hey, take it easy.

Look, I'll tell you what.

I'll give you a lift into L.A.

and then I'll have my
own personal mechanic

take a look at it and
fix it up as good as new.

Really? Sure, I got
a phone in the car,

he can send a tow
truck immediately.

Great.

[♪♪♪]

I really don't know
how to thank you.

Hey, it's no trouble.

You've been so
kind already, I...

I really hate to impose.

Why? What? What is it?

What? [LAUGHS]

I haven't eaten since breakfast,

do you think we could
stop and get a bite to eat?

Gibel?

Stop at that, uh, that...

That little place
in Redondo Beach.

Oh, thank you.

Listen, I got a terrific idea.

Why don't you be my house
guest while you're in L.A.?

Oh, I couldn't.

You've already
done so much for me.

Nonsense.

Come on.

Come on, what do you say?

[SIGHS]

[ENGINE STRUGGLES]

Uh-oh.

Whatever my car had,
it must've been catchy.

I don't believe it.

[ENGINE STRUGGLES]

I... I don't know
what's wrong with it.

All right, tell Malakian
to send another tow truck.

Come on, sweetheart,
we'll take a cab.

Don't let this car
out of your sight.

[♪♪♪]

Tell the cab to wait.

Dexter doesn't
seem to have his car.

Kris, I... I'm sorry.

Look, why don't you
take your bag upstairs?

Uh, this will only
take a minute.

Sure.

What are you doing here?
Delivery isn't for three days.

We got a tip.

Senator Langston knows
about the Mexican run.

He's after the Rolls.

That's impossible.

We want that money
back now, not in three days.

Now, wait.

Wait.

I gotta think this through.

Take that money out
of the Rolls now, Dexter.

I have to make a phone call.

[♪♪♪]

[PHONE RINGING]

It's for you.

Take a message.

Guy says he's gotta
talk to you personally,

some guy named Dexter.

[HISSING]

Gibel here.

Yeah, Dexter, what's happening?

Get the money out of the car.

Dexter, there's mechanics
all over this joint,

if I take the money
out now, they'll see it.

Get them out.

I can't do it fast,
I'll mess up the car.

[HISSING]

Just do it.

I'll handle it.

We can go get the...

Cards. At Malakian's garage.

You're going to the garage?

Great, I can check on my car.

And we'll follow your cab.

Sure. Why not?

Come on.

Ah-hah, is this my car?

No, it's mine.

Come on.

DEXTER: Gibel?

Gibel, what are you doing?

It's gone.

The money's all gone.

But it's impossible, it...

It wasn't out of my
sight long enough.

Idiot, you've got the wrong car,

that's my Rolls
outside, this one's hers.

Mine?

MALAKIAN: We finished
repairing your car, Mr. Dexter,

so we started on this one,

and then this maniac
pulls out a gun.

You want me to call the cops?

No, no, that's
all right, it's, uh...

It's all a mistake.

Excuse me, Mr. De Sousa
would like a word with you.

Where is the money?

In the other Rolls. It's okay,

Gibel will get it
but there's, um,

there's something
I have to tell you,

it's, uh, 75,000 thousand short.

But I can make it up by
the regular delivery date.

Ah, Dexter, I tried to tell you.

Listen to me,

I have close to a million
dollars worth of Mayan

art treasures sitting in
my warehouse right now.

And to show my
good faith, I'll, uh...

I'll let you hold onto them
until I can repay the money.

Come on, what do you say?

I could take the 75,000
from your rainy day fund.

[LAUGHS]

Mayan art treasures.

How can I refuse you?

I just love to watch you work.

Harley? Harley.

[LAUGHS]

Thank you. Excuse me.

Harley, what about my car?

What about my beautiful car?

Don't worry about
it, I'll have it fixed.

In time for my class
reunion tonight?

Tonight?

Yeah.

You know,

there just might
be another solution.

[♪♪♪]

There.

Thank you.

Now my car's legally
yours, your car's legally mine.

Same car, same value.

No harm done, right?

Right.

Look, uh, why don't
you go upstairs and, uh,

put that away
somewhere and then, uh,

we can have a drink together.

Okay? Okay.

Well, there you are.

[CHUCKLES]

Kris will be around
with the Rolls

in just a couple of minutes.

Thanks, Mr. Bosley.

You know, but I... I
still don't understand.

I mean, why didn't
we just take the money

that we found hidden in Dexter's
Rolls when we had the chance?

Because it wasn't his.

It belonged to his associates.

And we do not
want them after us.

[LAUGHS] Well, I just...

It all worked out beautifully.

Look, you know, I can
sell that Rolls of Dexter's

for 70,000 easy.

And we take away the five
that we paid for Kris' clunker,

and I still get my 65,000 back.

Thanks again.

Two down, one to go.

Yeah.

[BOTH LAUGHING]

[♪♪♪]

Hi.

Hi.

I really don't know
how to thank you.

We'll find a way.

[DOORBELL RINGS]

[BOTH CHUCKLING]

Excuse me.

Hi. Here I am.

Where do I park my bag?

Well, well, what have we here,

the upstairs maid?

I, uh, I... I didn't expect
you so soon, uh...

I didn't expect her at all.

If you're looking for stables,

they're out back.
Hey, wait a minute...

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Whoa, wait, whoa, whoa.

Uh, look, it... It's just a
minor misunderstanding.

Yes, I think we
both misunderstood.

Please wait in the study, okay?

Give me a chance to explain.

I mean, after all
I've done for you.

Okay?

Come on.

What are you doing here?

Just what did she mean
by that stables crack?

She's upset.

Well, so am I, pard.
Listen, if I'd known

you were running some
kind of commune here,

I'd have stayed back in Mexico.

Goodbye, I'm leaving here.

Well, excuse me.

Hey, what's that all about?

Don't ask, okay?

All right, I... I gave De Sousa
the money out of the Rolls.

He went to the warehouse
to check out that art stuff,

make sure it covers the
75,000 that you're short.

[♪♪♪]

Uh... What's going on here?

I don't know.

Well, hello.

Thank you for the
daisies, they were beautiful.

I, uh, came in through the back,

I don't think we should
be seen together just yet.

Excuse me a second.

Tiffany Welles is in there.

Well, you said you wanted to
see her as soon as we got back.

That Rolls of yours
better be in good condition.

It is. It is.

Good, because I'm gonna
drive it out of here real fast.

I, uh... Wait, wait, wait.

Where you going?

Busy day.

Somehow I don't
get the impression

you're glad to see me.

Senator Langston's caused
me a great deal of trouble

in the last few days.

I'm sorry. Forget it.

Except for the investigation,
I've managed to survive.

Now, what are you doing here?

I am soliciting
campaign contributions.

[SCOFFS]

For a man who's out to get me?

I told you that
was just a cover.

Wait a minute. Wait.

You mean, I pay him,
he finds me innocent?

I don't believe it. You
heard what he said about me.

But he has to have
a tough public stance.

Surely a man of your
intelligence can understand why.

Look, it's been a long day.

Suppose, uh, you tell me.

He has to establish
his credibility

so that if he does
find you innocent,

everybody will believe him.

Plus, now you do
have to pay him off

because if you don't,
he will send you to prison.

Kind of ups the
price, don't you think?

Something wrong?

I never cease to be amazed

by the duplicity in all of us.

Everybody's on
the take, Mr. Dexter,

haven't you
figured that out yet?

The only difference
between you and them

is that they're mostly amateurs.

How much? Oh,
100,000 would do it.

[SCOFFS] That's, uh,
hardly an amateur figure.

And when? No,
no, no, let me guess.

You want it now.

[CHUCKLES]

Well?

I haven't got it.

We know all about
your getaway fund.

Oh, no. No, I need that.

What for? By the end of the
week the charges will be dropped.

The injunction
will be lifted too.

What does Langston know
about the Mexican run?

What he knows, he'll
forget, so you're in the clear.

Besides, a man like you must
have lots of deals in the works.

You can replace
that 100,000 easy.

Hey, listen, you're right.

It's been a ridiculous week.

But as I said, I've survived.

[♪♪♪]

[SIGHS]

Uh...

Have another drink.

Oh, I think I'll have
to take a rain check.

After all, the sooner I
get this to the senator,

the sooner he's on your side.

Yeah.

But I wouldn't worry.

I think we'll be seeing
each other again.

Smile, Gibel, the fix is in,

I told you I'd
do it and I did it.

I did it. [RINGS]

Yeah, hello.

[OVER PHONE]: This is De Sousa.

Your Mayan art treasures
are plaster of Paris, Dexter.

They're worthless.

More than that, they're
even authenticated worthless.

What?

They can't be.

I wanna see you now.

[PHONE CLICKS]

[SIGHS] Time for
a long vacation.

I'll pack, you bring
the getaway money.

It's gone.

What? I used it
to bribe Langston.

[♪♪♪]

There we go, $100,000.

Well, thank you, Mr. Bosley.

But what about Dexter?

Well, since Senator
Langston's subcommittee

has expanded its investigation

to include all of
Dexter's friends,

Mr. Dexter has been in hiding.

At a small hotel downtown.

Gibel's already in custody.

Well, I sold the car.

ANGELS: Great. That's fabulous.

Sixty-nine thousand, 991 dollars

and 52 cents.

Great. Wait a minute,

wait a minute, hold it, hold it.

That is eight dollars
and 48 cents short.

[♪♪♪]

I can live with it.

[CHUCKLES] No,
no, no, wait a sec,

Bosley's right.

We set out to collect
the full amount.

Our job is not finished.

You're right.

DEXTER: How can the
investigation still be on?

He must've gotten the bribe.

Well, what about the,
uh, the art treasures?

Were they fake all along?

Well, find out, what
am I paying you for?

I will pay you as
soon as I sell my Rolls.

What do you mean
it's a piece of junk?

It's worth $70,000.

I don't have any money, I
had to pay for my hotel room

with a credit card.

What?

Y... You can't turn
state's evidence,

you're my attorney.

Wait! Hello?

[KNOCK ON DOOR]

Who is it?

BOSLEY: Room service.

Yeah, over here's fine.

[♪♪♪]

Uh, what do I owe you?

Eight dollars and 48 cents.

That's all right,
keep it for the tip.

No, no, that's included
in the charge for the meal.

One dollar and 52 cents.

Yes, thank you.

Yeah.

[CHUCKLING]

DE SOUSA: I wanna
thank you, Dexter.

I just got promoted.

Got a call from back east.

I'm now in charge of
West Coast operations.

Oh, that's, uh...
That's nice. That's...

That's really nice.

Uh, you want a cup of coffee?

How about half a sandwich?

[CHUCKLES]

Take him.

How about a napkin?

It's okay, it's okay,
it's all a dream.

[LAUGHING]

BOSLEY: Going down?

[♪♪♪]