Celebrity Juice (2008–…): Season 13, Episode 4 - Episode #13.4 - full transcript
Hi, I'm Keith Lemon, and
these are my titles...
Plush or what?!
There is Holly Willoughbooby
coming out of a giant clam.
Still got them bangers, boys! There's
Fearne Cotton with a bow and arrow.
There's Gino D'Acampo
with a tiny willy.
We are all in heaven but
don't worry, we're not dead.
It's just an over-elaborate
metaphor for how great the show is.
We're still here to make the
best telly show on telly.
Celebrity Juice, on telly. HD.
Yeeeeeah!
All riiiiight!
Hey, let's meet our team captains.
First up it's Holly Willoughboozy!
Who's on your team, Holly?
Who's on your team?
Well, tonight on my right he's
back again, it's Gino D'Acampo!
Gino, Gino, Gino!
And on my left the stars of
Capital Radio's breakfast show,
it's Lisa Snowdon
and Dave Berry!
Two! Two!
It's funny because
whoever's team Gino is on
they always lose.
He's like a jinx!
I'm so bored of saying the
same thing, you know. <
Just say something really
horrible to him in Ital
Guarda, a volte, ti
giuro, te lo voglio dire
ma sei proprio un
gran testa di cazzo.
Yes, it is massive!
And I will take that as a
compliment, thanks very much, Gino!
Let meet our other team
captain, it's Fearne Cotton!
Fearne. Hello. Who's
on your team?
It's our favourite
doctor, Dr Christian!
And also from last year's X Factor,
from supergroup Stereo Kicks,
it's Chris!
Hey, Chris from Stereo Kicks.
Yes.
So, you are the one
that yodels, yes? No.
So you're the one
that yodels, yes?
Absolutely not.
Hey, it's the one
who yodels, yes?
No. That's not me.
Louis, is he mentoring you still?
Is he managing you?
No. He was just with us on the show
and he was obviously brilliant.
You know Louis. Yeah, I know him.
I know him. I know him.
I know him. I know him.
Do you still...?
Do you still speak to Louis?
He didn't really
know us on the show,
he got bit confused
with our names.
When I first saw you
guys on X Factor,
I swear I thought you were
Ashton from JLS but white.
I get that all the time.
Oh, yeah!
Oh, my God. He does!
So are you the one that yodels?
Er, no.
Are you the one that yodels?
Yes!
YEEEES!
Will you give us a yodel? Here, come
to the front and give us a yodel.
You've got to do it with me.
Yeah, you do it. I can't yodel.
You're going to show me how to yodel.
OK. Do you want a little lesson?
Yeah, that's what I
just asked for, yeah.
To start...
Say hello to a lady,
say hello to a lady?
You took the words
straight out of my mouth!
Say hello to a lady,
say hello to a lady...
It's like saying hello
to a lady, yeah?
Yeah. Gino!
Oh, Gino. Do it, man. Come here!
Gino, Gino, Gino!
I have no idea what you
guys are talking about.
You have just seen
how he does it.
Just give him another blow just so...
Another go!
Give it another go.
What the...
Gino, Gino, Gino!
Hey, did someone call a doctor?!
It's Dr Christian!
You are probably the
second most famous doctor.
You've got Doctor
Who, Doctor F...
What have you been up to?
We did that drugs show, Drugs Live.
Remember that?
Yes. You got mashed up with Jon
Snow from Channel 4, didn't you?
Tell us what it was like, being
on telly mashed up on skunk?
He's all right for getting
mashed with, actually.
He's got a few stories
to tell, yeah.
Did you feel like you might have
been glamorising getting mashed up
cos I just thought, they
are professional people
and I've never been mashed up. I like
Holly's crack but I was never...
He didn't have a good
time at all, really.
He didn't, did he? He was shit
scared and that sent a message
it's not always that fun. You're not
doing Embarrassing Bodies any more?
Well, I've done it for what,
eight years? Really?
Shit, doesn't time fly when
you're looking at people's balls
and they look like cauliflowers.
How do you not... OK.
How do you not just go...
..with the smell?
Because I'm imagining that
stuff doesn't smell very good.
The smell, I can't bear that.
Have you ever chucked?
As it opens up...
Ho ho!
If it had a sound
that would be it.
Oh, dear.
♪ Dave Berry, Lisa Snowdon
♪ I wouldn't touch him but
I'd have a go at her one
You off the multi-award-winning
breakfast show, Capital.
What is it like working
with someone...?
You're both attractive people,
has there ever been a moment
where you've gone, "We'll try it out,
see what it's like." Yeah. Yeah.
Often. We had a crazy Brits
after show
these are my titles...
Plush or what?!
There is Holly Willoughbooby
coming out of a giant clam.
Still got them bangers, boys! There's
Fearne Cotton with a bow and arrow.
There's Gino D'Acampo
with a tiny willy.
We are all in heaven but
don't worry, we're not dead.
It's just an over-elaborate
metaphor for how great the show is.
We're still here to make the
best telly show on telly.
Celebrity Juice, on telly. HD.
Yeeeeeah!
All riiiiight!
Hey, let's meet our team captains.
First up it's Holly Willoughboozy!
Who's on your team, Holly?
Who's on your team?
Well, tonight on my right he's
back again, it's Gino D'Acampo!
Gino, Gino, Gino!
And on my left the stars of
Capital Radio's breakfast show,
it's Lisa Snowdon
and Dave Berry!
Two! Two!
It's funny because
whoever's team Gino is on
they always lose.
He's like a jinx!
I'm so bored of saying the
same thing, you know. <
Just say something really
horrible to him in Ital
Guarda, a volte, ti
giuro, te lo voglio dire
ma sei proprio un
gran testa di cazzo.
Yes, it is massive!
And I will take that as a
compliment, thanks very much, Gino!
Let meet our other team
captain, it's Fearne Cotton!
Fearne. Hello. Who's
on your team?
It's our favourite
doctor, Dr Christian!
And also from last year's X Factor,
from supergroup Stereo Kicks,
it's Chris!
Hey, Chris from Stereo Kicks.
Yes.
So, you are the one
that yodels, yes? No.
So you're the one
that yodels, yes?
Absolutely not.
Hey, it's the one
who yodels, yes?
No. That's not me.
Louis, is he mentoring you still?
Is he managing you?
No. He was just with us on the show
and he was obviously brilliant.
You know Louis. Yeah, I know him.
I know him. I know him.
I know him. I know him.
Do you still...?
Do you still speak to Louis?
He didn't really
know us on the show,
he got bit confused
with our names.
When I first saw you
guys on X Factor,
I swear I thought you were
Ashton from JLS but white.
I get that all the time.
Oh, yeah!
Oh, my God. He does!
So are you the one that yodels?
Er, no.
Are you the one that yodels?
Yes!
YEEEES!
Will you give us a yodel? Here, come
to the front and give us a yodel.
You've got to do it with me.
Yeah, you do it. I can't yodel.
You're going to show me how to yodel.
OK. Do you want a little lesson?
Yeah, that's what I
just asked for, yeah.
To start...
Say hello to a lady,
say hello to a lady?
You took the words
straight out of my mouth!
Say hello to a lady,
say hello to a lady...
It's like saying hello
to a lady, yeah?
Yeah. Gino!
Oh, Gino. Do it, man. Come here!
Gino, Gino, Gino!
I have no idea what you
guys are talking about.
You have just seen
how he does it.
Just give him another blow just so...
Another go!
Give it another go.
What the...
Gino, Gino, Gino!
Hey, did someone call a doctor?!
It's Dr Christian!
You are probably the
second most famous doctor.
You've got Doctor
Who, Doctor F...
What have you been up to?
We did that drugs show, Drugs Live.
Remember that?
Yes. You got mashed up with Jon
Snow from Channel 4, didn't you?
Tell us what it was like, being
on telly mashed up on skunk?
He's all right for getting
mashed with, actually.
He's got a few stories
to tell, yeah.
Did you feel like you might have
been glamorising getting mashed up
cos I just thought, they
are professional people
and I've never been mashed up. I like
Holly's crack but I was never...
He didn't have a good
time at all, really.
He didn't, did he? He was shit
scared and that sent a message
it's not always that fun. You're not
doing Embarrassing Bodies any more?
Well, I've done it for what,
eight years? Really?
Shit, doesn't time fly when
you're looking at people's balls
and they look like cauliflowers.
How do you not... OK.
How do you not just go...
..with the smell?
Because I'm imagining that
stuff doesn't smell very good.
The smell, I can't bear that.
Have you ever chucked?
As it opens up...
Ho ho!
If it had a sound
that would be it.
Oh, dear.
♪ Dave Berry, Lisa Snowdon
♪ I wouldn't touch him but
I'd have a go at her one
You off the multi-award-winning
breakfast show, Capital.
What is it like working
with someone...?
You're both attractive people,
has there ever been a moment
where you've gone, "We'll try it out,
see what it's like." Yeah. Yeah.
Often. We had a crazy Brits
after show