Celebrity Ex on the Beach (2014–2020): Season 6, Episode 2 - Episode #6.2 - full transcript

Let the fun commence.

(music plays, whooping, laughter)

'Ex on the Beach is back!'

'Eight new unsuspecting singles
are looking for love.'

'But what they don't know is...'

Fuck!

'...there are more exes
than ever before.'

My arse has fell out me shorts.
You cheated on me!

Stop acting the fucking big man!

You are my best friend
and I wouldn't do that to you!

'And they're flying in
from everywhere.'



(shouting)

(man) Go on!
(laughter)

'Some exes want romance...'

I do really, really love him.

'...some want revenge...'

(shouting, screaming)

(man) Let go now! Let go now!

No-one fuckin' likes ya!
See ya later.

'...and others
just want to wreck the gaff.'

(clattering)
Hey!

That'll be
someone's fucking head in a minute.

'As always, the Tablet of Terror
is topping up the torment...'

It's gonna be fireworks.
'...causing misery...'(sobs)

What am I gonna do?
You will never, ever have me again.



'...mayhem...'
You fucking dickhead!

(screaming)
'...and madness.'

(yelling, laughter)

'It's gonna get... explosive!'

(shouting, screaming)

'Two exes have already arrived...'

I hate her guts.
Slag! Slag! Slag! Slag!

My heart is breaking.

If a particular ex comes on,
I think I'll vom on the beach.

Fucking shitting myself.

Fuck me, if one of my bad exes
come out this water,

I am fucking done.

I've got a leg twitch.

Everything's going well
with me and Harriette.

If an ex comes in, it's gonna stir
shit up and could ruin things.

(shouting)

Oh, easy!

What's happening? Hi!
How you doing, babe?Whoo!

You all right?
Yeah. You?

Yes!

She's a good ex,
so I'm fucking buzzing.

Whoo!
Hello.Nice to meet you.

I am smug as fuck. It's not my ex.

Fine. How are you?

She's an absolute rocket!

I'm Nicole, I'm from Essex.
I'm a part-time model

and a full-time nightmare.

I won't be anyone's vice president
in that villa.

I'm the fucking queen.

Yeah, put that in.

I've been single for a couple of
months cos boys are fucking wankers.

I was seeing Josh Ritchie
for, like, a couple of months.

He's a beautiful-looking boy.

But I think I might be a bit too
much for Josh to handle.

Fucking right buzzing, I am.
(laughs)

Excited to see Josh.
We get along well. He's looking fit,

like a salty potato.

I'm... I'm... just glad it weren't
none of my fucking naughty exes.

I feel Josh has feelings for Nicole.
I'm gonna drop him in it,

cos he was in bed with Zara
last night. I'm gonna fuck it up.

She's been with him.

What?Fuck off!
No, he wasn't.

No, I haven't.
Why you trying to shit-stir?

Little twat.

We slept next to each other
in a bed.

Nicole is gorgeous.
I'm getting nowhere with Zara.

I'm gonna fuck her off.

I just spooned...
Well, I wouldn't say...

I'm glad we didn't properly spoon,
put it that way.

Didn't even spoon. We planked.

How about I spoon someone, then?

What if she spooned me?

Really, Ross?

Who wouldn't fancy Ross?
Looks well fit.

Oh, shit!

Oh, fuck off, Tablet of Terror.
"Welcome, Nicole."

"It's date time for you and Ross to
rack it up and get a little loose."

Fucking hell. (blows raspberry)

Date time! Right now,
I'm 100% committed to Harriette,

but who knows what might happen?

See you soon, babe.

Just can't wait
for the games to begin.

Catch you in a bit.

I'm going back to that villa,

getting that big wooden spoon out
of mine and stirring shit up.

Harriette, come here,
I've got some stories to tell you.

'Back at the villa, Alex is pouring
his heart out to Harriette,

about cheating on his ex.'

Obviously this girl you talk about,
yeah... Alice, is it?Yeah, yeah.

So, say for instance,
she was to come in...

what would you want to say to her?

I was a twat
and I was a complete prick to my ex.

After being such a dickhead to her,
and cheating on her,

I wish I could go back
and change it all.

I'd say sorry for everything
and I love her,

and I'm ready to, like,
give it a go, innit?

I suppose.

Aw, babe.
(cries)

Oh, no, he's crying.

You're such a genuine person
with such mad emotions.

Like...
I know.

I fucking hate this guy.
Why d'you hate this guy?

Fucking pussy.It's not that you're
being a great, big, massive pussy.

It's the fact that you have
a really genuine side to you.

(sniffs)I've got
Ross coming back to the villa,

potentially with his ex.
Now I've got Alex crying.

'Oh, my God, how much more stress
can a girl take?'

It's hard, man. Hard, innit?

'Poor Alex(!) Crying cos
you cheated on your girlfriend.'

'Well, it's too late for regrets.'

'Exes are washing up
with one thing on their mind.'

'Revenge.'

'Whose ex is next?'

'With Zahida and Sean
still out on a horse-riding date,

Zahida's ex, Joe,
is trying to get a ride of his own.'

I'm confused about you and Zee.
Like, what...

There's definitely something there.
No, no, there's not.

It's not that. It's because...
She brought back all the feelings...

...I got when with her.
The insecurities, everything.

Maisie seems quite chilled out...

in comparison to Zahida,
who is an absolute nutcase.

I wouldn't want, like, it to ruin
us getting to know each other.

I know Joe can come across
a bit of a dick to some people.

One on one,
he's a really intellectual guy.

I only got to feed the pony.

Tonight, I'm hoping for
a fucking ride the pony.

'Very intellectual, indeed(!)'

It's so relaxing
without Zee in the house.

Here they are!

Oh!
(Zahida)Ooh!

Any romance? Any butterflies?

Er, little kiss at the end.

Fuck off.

Any kick-offs between you two
tonight?Nah.

Erm, no,
but we do need to talk about stuff.

I do like Sean but I love Joe.

But if he's moving on with Maisie,
maybe it's time for me to move on.

It cannae kick off.
There's no point.

'Yeah, good luck with that, Joe.'

Right, what's the craic?

I don't want to talk to you.
Do you not?No.

Still? At all?
Not right now.OK.

I couldn't think of anything worse
than talking to her.

Sit next to Sean.

Yeah, I'm gonna.
Well, go.

I am going.
Sit here, babes.

Fucking hell!

I'm not gonna listen to you anymore.
I've waited long enough.

Why should I respect your feelings
when you don't respect mine?

Look at our matching outfits.

She is an absolute fucking wind-up.

Above and beyond awkward.

'With still no sign of Ross
back from the beach,

it's squeaky-bum time for Harriette.'

I'm really fine, I promise you.

I'm absolutely shitting myself.

You look like you're
bouncing on a dick.(laughter)

(Josh) What's happening, people?

(cheering)
Hey, guess whose ex it were.

Where the fuck... is Ross?

So, Ross is on a date with my ex.
What does she look like?

Rocket.
(laughter)

She's a fiery girl as well. Like,

fiery.
Yeah, rocket, mate.

I just wanna know that, number one,
Ross doesn't like her,

number two, she don't like him,

(Zaralena) What does she look like?
Brown hair, blonde?

Brown hair. Bit like you. (laughs)

Why have you got your spoon out
and stirring it? This is raw.

Only thing is,
she's a bit more tanned.

(laughs) Why am I such a cunt?

Josh, stop it!
She's more tanned.

The more Josh winds Harriette up

the more I can see tears welling up
behind her eyes. Juicy shit!

What's her name?
Nicole.

Fuck. I think I know who she is.

I know who it is.
(Maisie)How?

Who do you think it is?

The girl I was saying
that was his ex.

Fuck.

Oh, shit!
Was it?

Was it?
Yeah.

We're from the same area.
We was with the same guy.

Fucking hell!

This is getting a bit weird.

I reckon they might crack on.
Shut up!

Josh, mate, you fucking lad!
Like, say it how it is.

'Oh-ho-ho! Harriette,
you don't know the half of it.'

'Ross and Nicole are on
a raki-tasting date with a twist.'

'They've gotta taste it
off each other's lips.'

Banana?
I dunno. It was nice, though.

(coughs)

Whoa! Don't get your tongue in.

Urgh! What is it?
Aniseed.

I'm not kissing her,
not breaking any rules. Good boy.

So, what's been going on?

I was the first one to go on a date
and kissed a girl.

Ooh!Erm...And how long
have you been talking to this girl?

Two days.
Oh, my God!

Seems like they've been married off.

I've got the hottest bird in there
at the moment.

So I just stuck with it.

That's a nice thing to say(!)
"I just stuck with it."

Nicole's asking me a lot
about Harriette.

I think she might be
a little bit jealous.

So you've been good?

Yeah, well-behaved, me.

But Josh hasn't?

No, he's been well-behaved.
He just got a cuddle.

Why, are you bothered about it?
Not, really, no.

I like Josh but I don't wanna
throw all my eggs in one basket.

What about me, then?
It's not...

It's not really for me
to get involved with, to be fair.

I'm a good girl.

Girl code!

(laughs)

'Ross is a good-looking boy.'

He's really fun
and easy to get on with.

Shall we do another shot?
I'll do one.

Where is Ross and Nicole right now?
Because I'm not gonna lie,

it is getting late.
I completely forgot about them.

Surely this date can't be going
that well. Hurry the fuck home.

What would you be like
if they necked on? He's not gonna.

(shouting, laughter)

There they fucking are. Look at him,
swagged up. What are you saying?

Rargh, she's ridiculous.

Everyone introduce themselves.

Get a seat.

I've seen Harriette.
She won't look at me.

She's pissed off.

So your name was Z...?
Zahida.Zahida.

Your name is?
Harriette.

How was it? Was it a good day?

Did you neck on?
Nah.

Josh, mate, not everyone's like you,
darling.(laughter)

Ross, you fucking dickhead.
Reassure me.

And you were tasting shots, yeah?

Yeah,
as it basically said on the thing,

you have to taste each other's with
your tongue, but we didn't go...

It...Little tongue?
No, it weren't even little tongue.

It was just like a small peck.

'Are you fucking serious?'

"We lick each other's mouths.
It's fine."

It's not fucking fine.
That's slaggish. Mad slaggish.

All right. Sweet. Just interested.

I've come in and everyone's all
smiley and Harriette's like...

Listen, if anyone's got anything
to say, say it to me.

We didn't tongue each other, snog.

Why are you getting on
the defensive straightaway?

(talks over Nicole)
Nobody's even said that.

She's so lairy.
She's got more attitude,

more fucking front
than Southend fucking front.

We're like...
I'm just saying...

You're the one on the defensive.
You need to calm down.

Calm down.Then say it to me
and that's it.Fine.

To be honest, love, I don't really
give a shit what you wanna say.

I wanna have a conversation with
Ross and punch his fucking head in.

'With tensions mounting,

who will be the first to explode
when the next ex arrives?'

'T minus 12 hours.'

Zara,
what's been happening in the house?

Er...
(laughter)

I've just got here
and everyone else is fucked.

Who's with who?
(talk over each other)

Joe. Good to meet you. That's my ex.
Maisie is on my ex's lap.

There's no other chair... Fuck all
to do with you, though, does it?

Doesn't have fuck all
to do with you, does it?

Does it, mug? Mug?

Bang, round 25.

Trying to talk to you all, it's like
you two are at each other's throats.

Must be some sort of toxic,
whether it's love, whether hate.

The only toxic thing is her.

She is poison
and you are doing yourself wrong,

making friends with her. And I'm...
You'll find that out yourself.

If a human's ever been poison,
she is fucking that. She is poison.

Hold on.
You'll find that out yourself.

She's laughing cos she loves it. She
knows how much of a bitch she is.

I'm so confused
about the Joe and Zahida thing.

He's telling me he's not got
feelings, yet he's freaking out.

She knows. Look at her.

Yesterday, you had your fucking
fingers, your hand,

your fist,
your full elbow inside Maisie.

You haven't got a leg to stand on,
or a hand to fist with.

Look at the poison in her eyes, man.
Hold on. You can't put a flower...

Fuck off.

This Joe guy's a lairy little prick.

You can't talk to a girl like that.
Ridiculous.

No one understands the emotion I go
through every time she looks at me.

You slut.Joe, never call a lady
a slut in front of me, please.

Fucking bell-end.

I know for a fact
she's a bullshitter.

I'm looking in your eyes
and I can see the pain in your eyes.

'Joe, kid, calm the fuck down.'

Why don't you finger-blast Maisie

while I can do what I want to
with Zahida?

You have pain and insecurity
in your eyes. It's sad.

Cos you found out she shagged Sean?
Yeah, I can do what I want.

It's fuck all to do with you.
Claiming you're a lady?

I haven't seen that.
Wait!You're a fucking bitch.

(shouting)
All fucking arseholes.

(Zara) And you're a gentleman, babe.
Fuck off.

Fucking stupid...

(yells) Fuck!

Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!

Joe is a bell-end.

Get me outta here!

Fuck!

Hard nut, boxer.
He's made a hole in the wall.

Idiot.
That's coming out of his pocket.

Sit on my lap.

A shoulder to cry on
and a cock to sit on.

Can't handle this anymore.
I need to get the fuck out.

I'm fucking sick of kicking off,
man.

That little fucking moth
needs to die.

I fucking hate this fucking place!

Fuck's sake!
I'm sick of this fucking shit.

Fucking load of bollocks!

'With Joe still shouting
into his pillow...' (muffled) Fuck!

'...it seems he's not the only one
ending the night on a bum note.'

Argh! Oh, my God!
(laughs)

Fuck you!

(Josh) So, what's your craic?
Do you wanna sleep down with me?

Well, not with you, but I'm gonna
sleep in this big buddle of love.

I really like Josh but I feel
we need to work on our friendship.

'Ah! Looks like Harriette's
not ready to call it a night.'

Did you touch her lips?
I licked her lip.

I don't lick people's mouths.
I don't lick friends' mouths.

I feel like
he's fucked me up the arse.

You're a fucking dickhead!

Playing the game, I went on a date.
You played the fucking game, yeah?

Guilty.

(sniggers)

You're a fucking dickhead.
I ain't doing this shit.

Stay the fuck away from me.

Whole game's gonna change now.

(exhales deeply)

I don't think Harriette
wants anything to do with me.

Where's Nicole?

'Last night was mental. I've been in
this bubble with Ross for two days.'

And, all of a sudden, it's popped.

I haven't done anything wrong.
If you think so, that's cool.

We'll just see
when the boot's on the other foot.

Is that how we're playing it?
All right.

Can't be arsed after days of knowing
someone, having deep convos,

getting told she's gonna
start playing games, so I'm out.

'Could have probably cracked on
last night but...'

girls here are not my type.

'Keep on thinking about my ex.
Er...'

I've been dreaming about her,
especially in this environment.

I'm hoping if she does come in,
I can give her my all,

maybe make it up to her.

'Definitely time to move on
from Joe.'

Fucking psycho.
I can't be dealing with that.

I've had enough fucking psycho exes.
Not again.

It's nice that I can crack on,
have a bit of fun,

just see who wants to get involved.

I can't help but feel sorry for Joe.

I feel like he's came in here
and ruined things for himself.

All right.

The only side everyone's seen is the
angry side. I've seen how he can be.

I need to leave.

I can't stay here anymore.

'I'm sick of... looking like an...'

absolute nutcase because of the-the
raw passion she brings out of me.

I can't do it to myself anymore.

I don't want him to go. (sniffs)

I want you to stay here
and make the most of your time.

I can't hold you back.

I need to get completely away from
her and start afresh in my own head.

But I still love you.
I love you.

(sobs)And I... I-I need you
to know that before I leave.

(sniffs)

I'm telling my true feelings,
which I haven't done here.

I'm in love with you,
but I hate you.

I can't do this to myself anymore.

The thoughts going through my
head... I can't control myself.

You're the only thing
that can get me to that point

where I'm punching walls and I'm...
and kicking off. And you know that.

I'm not good for him.

And I thought I was.

It's just destructive and I have
to just accept it and let go.

I'm gonna pack my bags and go.

(sighs)

(sniffs) I wish it didn't have to
end like this, but I know it does.

(sniffs)

(sobs)

Being here has brought out the best
of us... Fuck! I knew it! You are!

...and the worst of us.
Fuck off. Fucking stupid. Fuck!

I pulled.

I've had banter.

You fucking bitch.
Joe is a massive...

You slut.
...dick.

I'm not an idiot.

Moving forward,
I'm gonna work on myself as a brand.

Fuck!
He's not happy.

I fucking hate this fucking place!

Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!

'After the morning's drama,
everyone's relaxing.'

'But not for long.'

(ding)
Fuck off.

Oh, no! Here comes trouble.

I'm gonna take that Tablet of Terror
and chuck it in the fucking pool.

Surprise, surprise, guys.

It's time for Sean, Nicole
and Harriette to go to the beach.

It better not fucking be
Sean's ex coming in.

Shit.

'She's just playing games with me.'

She can fuck off.

I'm literally crapping myself.
Literally.

Who's ex is actually that bad?
Mine.

I'm dipping my dick in
whenever I want.

I've gotta explain to my ex,
if she's here,

that my dick is still fresh
from last night.

It could be this guy
that she really likes.

It could be him, babe.
It really could.

If it is him, I'm gonna break down.

I've never loved anyone
like I've loved him before.

We've got one ex in common, Jack.

I was seeing him when I was
19, 20 years old.

I see Jack, like, three days
before I come out here.

I just wanna sort things out
with Ross.

My ex Jack coming out the water
is gonna fuck everything up.

Be honest with me. With Harriette
and the Nicole situation,

do you think
I did anything wrong there?

Whatever.
I don't really give a shit.

Nothing, mate.

You're a good-looking guy and, like,
she's probably luckier to have you.

Ross has feelings for Harriette.

Why?
Probably because she's got a vagina.

She's great-looking, but
I don't think her ex will be better.

I'm not worried
if her ex turns up today.

I'm the fittest guy in the villa,
so I'm not bothered.

I'm just gonna move on now.

Who knows?Yeah.
Might be some birds come in.

Yeah, who knows, mate.
Some hotties.

Your rocket ex might come in.
(they laugh)

She won't go near you boys,
I'm telling you!

She fucking hates guys. She thinks
all guys are cunts, except me,

and I'm the biggest one of all!
(laughs weirdly)

Do you know what I mean?

What a bell-end.

'(chuckles) You said it, Ross.'

I am absolutely shitting it.
Getting tense.

Oh, my God.
What's going on?

I knew it was gonna be Jack.

How you doing?

I'm happy Jack's in here.
He'll get the party going.

Sean. What's your name?Jack. How
you doing? You sweet?Good, babe.

Seeing Jack's face makes me feel...

like home.

What's happening?

(sighs) Oh, fucking hell.

I'm Jack, I'm 24 and I'm from Essex.

I'm not intimidated by no one, nah.

I've got a saying.

Life's a lot like a penis - simple,
soft, straight and hanging free.

Then a woman comes
and makes it hard.

(laughs)

Coming in to two exes...

...it's a bit of a mind-fuck.
I ain't really worried about Nicole,

but as for Harriette,
I'd like to sweeten up with her.

Can I just clear something up?
Whose ex is this?

That was my ex
from a couple years back.

It was so long ago,
I don't think about it.

Ship's sort of sailed now, innit?

As for you, I'd like to rekindle
something with her, sweeten it up.

Oh, my God!

'I can't believe
this is coming out of his mouth.'

This is, like, the first time
I've ever seen him be real with me.

I think that ship's sailed as well.
Has it?

Sean, it's none of your fucking
business. Stay out of it.

There is somebody in there that I've
been, like, talking on a level. Huh?

She's only been in two days,
already grabbing hold of a geezer.

What, you slept with him?
No.

You ain't?No.
So what's happened?

Nothing. We've just been
getting close. Kissed? Talked?

Yeah, we've been talking and there
has been a few, like, kisses.

Do you like the fella?
He is a nice guy,

but, obviously, like...

This is possibly one of the hardest
situations I've ever, ever been in.

Obviously, what?

(exhales deeply)

She's in a sticky situation.
I do feel for her.

First, she was like,
"I just wanna talk to Ross,"

and when Jack turned up,
she was like, "Shit."

You might as well spill the beans,
girl. Come on.

It's just such a weird feeling.

It's a familiar face and when I'm
around him, I do feel really secure.

It's just bringing up...

proper, like... (groans softly)
raw emotion. (sniffs)

I still do like you.
Sweet.

(whispers) Fuck.

We gotta have a word.
So you do wanna talk to me?

Yeah, we'll have a little talk.

If all they've done is kissed,
and a couple little soppy stories,

then, yeah, we might be able to talk
and smooth it over.

See what happens.

I'm not sure how I'm gonna handle
going back to the villa.

Let's have a cheers to tonight.

(all) Cheers.Here's to some more
shit that's gonna come down.

(Jack) Holler!

What's happening?
Yeah, you all right?

'I know who it is. Harriette's ex.
Harriette's shitting herself.'

Her face is just like that.

All I wanna do is talk to Jack

and tell him my side of the story
before anybody else gets there first.

So have you come here for Harriette?

I come to sort things out,
but, obviously, I've heard, like,

you two have been getting
a bit close, know what I mean?

Ross ain't a bad-looking boy, but...

he ain't really got a scratch on me,
has he?

If it's necking on,
it is what it is, innit.

I know yous lot play games.

He's from Essex so he's giving it
the big 'uns a bit.

Yeah.
I'm a boy myself, mate.

I know the craic but I'm gonna
have to have a chat with you.

Not gonna speak to Harriette
before Ross?

It's a man-to-man thing,
innit, babe.

Great(!)
(Josh) Both of yous go for a chat.

(Maisie) All right, guys, good luck.

Nah, it's all good.
What's going on? Sweet, yeah?

Yeah, sweet. To be fair, mate,
you've got nothing to worry about.

'They've unfinished business.'

I ain't getting involved
in no love triangle.

Nothing's happened at all.
Nah.

Just spooned, cuddled.
Yeah.We kissed and that's it.

Er...
How d'you feel about her?

I'll be honest with you. At the
start, I did proper like her.Yeah.

There's not any trust, so in my
eyes, it's done. Done, mate, yeah.

Have her, mate. She's all yours.

Sweet, mate.
Nothing to worry about.

Cool, bruv. Don't worry about that.

He's a drip, at the end of the day.

Old fucking grey hair,

he looks like he's done an 'eadstand
in an ashtray.

'It looks like
Jack's making himself at home,

but nobody should get too comfortable
as the next ex has already landed.'

'Expect the unexpected.'

So, obviously, you told him that
it's done between me and you, yeah?

Yeah.
Cool.

I'm not second-best
and I won't be second-best.

I don't feel we've got a lot more to
say to each other, then. All right.

He's the one that fucked us up.

Babe, you've had the best,
now it's time to have the rest.

Let's all do impressions of each
other. We've gotta guess who it is.

Who's starting?
Ready.

I don't give a fuck about you,
I'm gonna fucking kick off!

(girls) Joe!

(laughter)

(tablet dings)

(shouting)

(girl) Oh, God.
Ohhh!

Are you fucking joking me?

(laughs)

No! What?

Welcome to the villa, Jack,
but you're not the only new arrival.

This place is fucking nuts.

Alex's ex is here.

(laughs)
(cheering)

Oh, shit!

Really?

(groans, imitates screams)

Here we go!
(they talk over each other)

(whooping, cheering)
(boy) Oh, my God!

(screams)

Since when do exes
just turn up on the balcony?

That's mine and Sean's
fucking bedroom. Get out, you bitch.

Jump off! (laughs)

I'm Alice
and I'm a dancer in Ibiza.

I met Alex in Marbella.
We just clicked instantly.

And we had, like,
a life in London together.

And it went sour because he cheated.

He had another girlfriend.
Behind my back.

Broke my heart.

"Alex's ex is here, but who will be
the first to greet her,

with a champagne reception?"
(boy)Oh, shit.

"Josh, the control is in your
hands."(whooping, applause)

"Will it be Alex,
or will it be you?"

The geezer's arse
is gonna fall fucking right out.

(laughter, shouting)

(girl) What are you gonna do?
(Jack)What are you gonna do, bruv?

What's happening? What's your name?

I'll let Alex watch from window.

(laughter, cheering)

Josh has chose to fucking go to the
penthouse so he can fuck off now.

If he wants to play that game,
I'll play it back.(laughter)

'I've had the shittest day.'

I'm gonna be crying in about an hour,
so I'm gonna enjoy it.

(they talk over each other)

(laughter)

Alex looks like he's relieved
and shit himself at the same time.

(imitates sobbing,
inhales sharply, laughs)

(girl) Ruthless, Josh.

Oh, it is so real.

'It's not fun.
It's actually like living in hell.'

What's happening? I'm Josh.
Hi, Josh. Nice to meet you. Alice.

Cheers, Alex, for your ex-missus.
Heh-heh!

(Nicole) Just sort of deep-breath it.
I'm going up there.You can't.

Just don't make things worse.

'All I wanna do is talk to Alice.'

But I can't,
cos that fucking prick's in the way.

(cork pops) Has he done bad
towards you? Obviously.

I'm gonna fuckin' reyt stitch him up.

So you're not looking
to get back with him?

No.You're not looking
to get back with him?No.

One sec, let me tip my drink, then
we'll cheers to that. (they laugh)

Just chill out and you'll be fine.
(boys talk over each other)

Chill out, you'll be cool.

I can't wait to see her and talk to
her and, like, have a chat with her.

Why's the reasons
from you and Alex splitting up?

Well, he was unfaithful.
Unfaithful?A lot. Numerous times.

Wow!

(Maisie) Nothing's gonna happen.
He's fucking going. Can't stop him.

I think it'd only ever happen
if I...Right.Oh, God.

The geezer hisself.

'Think his ears are burning.'

How you doing?
I'm OK.

Want a drink? We'll air a few things
out, if you want. Yeah, let's do it.

He's sat there with a smug look
on his face.

I'm gonna ruin his life.

Me, Sean and Maisie are desperately
trying to peer up onto the balcony.

Shit's going down.

I feel like Alex...
wants to get back with you,

but you look like you just wanna
leave it... move on wi' your life.

A couple of months ago,
I did wanna be with you.Yeah.

But now you wanna move on?
Yeah.

Really?

I can't believe she said that.
That's a bit sore to hear, like.

I'm so upset with you.Why?
Cos I just am.

I care about Alex,
but not in that way anymore.

Leave it.
Why are you like this?

I'm not gonna lie, Alex, mate...
Yeah.

If we kiss, are you gonna be pissed
off? Not gonna happen anyway, bruv.

Josh fucking loves it, don't he?

So...
no need to get aggressive, mate.

I'm gonna wipe that smile
right off his face.

I'm just drinking my drink,
know what I mean?

She's reyt good-looking as well.

He won't shut the fuck up.
Oh, my God!

No need to get aggressive.
Fucking hate his guts.

What the fuck have you done?
Why are you getting aggressive?

(sighs)
You spit your dummy out there.

You spit your dummy out.
I think it's quite shit from you.

Can I go downstairs?That wasn't
towards you, was it, huh?

Doesn't matter, Alex.
Huh?

Can we talk in here a second?

(they talk indistinctly)
Talk in here now. Come in here now.

Has everyone had a good night?

I've had a lovely night.
I smell of champagne a bit.

I fucking do love you to pieces,
man. I fucking do.

(sniffs)

I just wanna make it all up to you.
I want you to be my wife, man.

(sighs).I do. I wanna marry you.
You know that.

And I treated you like a cunt.

It's horrible because I thought
I would have married him,

but just no.

I don't think she's in love with him
anymore. That's all I'm saying.

(laughs, claps) Fucking hell.

I was always there for you.
I love you, man.

I... I quit my job, I-I...
I moved to Marbella.I know you did.

He has seen me cry on my knees.

And he still wanted to cheat.

I did everything. Did you come home
at night, take me out for dinner?

You didn't even take me out
for dinner.I'm sorry.

'Not going very well, is it, Alex?'

'Let's see if Harriette is having
more luck with her ex, Jack.'

I fucked up, like...
What you done is a shock to me.

It is.
Yeah, I know. I know.

It is. I see it, I see it.
It's muggy, mate.

I see your face. It's muggy, innit. I
had to hold back, innit, out there.

All I wanna do is build trust back

with somebody that I really respect
and care about.

Yeah,
I got a bit of grovelling to do.

What?I've got grovelling to do.
Yeah, you have.

I'm really shit at this.
You have, though.

Who d'you wanna go to bed with,
me or numbnuts?

Obviously, like,
I wanna go bed with you.

'Appy days.

Come. Let's go.

(sobs) I just love you, man.
Don't do this to me, baby.

Please don't do this to me, babe.
Please. (sobs) I beg you.

(exhales deeply)

(sniffs)

I thought it was gonna be,
but, obviously, I've ruined it.

I've just had enough. I really...
I really have had enough.

I just wanna sort it out with you.

I have to go home.

I can't take this.

I just wanna be with you,
Alice, man, so bad.