Celebrity Ex on the Beach (2014–2020): Season 5, Episode 10 - Episode #5.10 - full transcript

'Ex On The Beach is back.'

'This time it's all-stars.'

'Old faces return for another shot
at finding love.'

Am I looking for love?
Fucking yes.

'They'll have to endure
their exes.'

I have never, ever felt like this
in my life.

'Some will have to deal with
old grudges.'

You've had more dicks
than I've had sunbeds.

'And hard as they try to find
their perfect match...'

Right! Who wants to finger me?

'...standing in their way once again
will be the Tablet of Terror.'



I won't lie. I'm cacking myself.
Big time.

'It's going to be hotter
than ever before.'

I'm gonna ride her.
Giddy up, Aimee.

'As emotions boil over...'

You made me realise that there's
more to life than what I was doing.

'...tensions run high...'

Dare ya! I fucking dare ya!

Let's fucking go, kid!

'...and the claws come out.'

Shut your face!

(shouting)

'So far 11 exes have arrived.'

She is the most toxic person
I have ever met.

I did not think
that I was gonna feel like this.



Aimee. She is gorgeous.

I like to flirt with him,

but he's not gonna get anywhere
just yet.

I'm having a shitter.

Am I gonna have any nasty surprises?

Did you see her
when I was in Australia with you?

I kinda slept with Chrysten
when I was with Lillie.

Stop it. That's your closure now.

Don't take advantage
when they trust you.

Bear is hot.

And we have a massive physical
attraction to each other.

Lillie's great, but Chrysten
is my sexy little secret.

Did you kiss him in the bathroom?
Yes.

(Lillie) I don't have
the time of day for Bear.

I just don't know how
I will trust anyone ever again.

When my best friend lies to me,
I cut them out of my life.

Mel was go fresh, obviously.

Don't give a shit about Kayleigh.
I'll do what I want.

She is a first class bitch.

OK, Melissa,
you want to play that game?

You wanna get in...
(shouting)

She's a fucking slag,

with a conky nose, saggy-ass tits
and she thinks she can speak to me?

Who the fuck does she think she is?

'With the all-stars adventure
drawing to a close,

it looks like one person
is going to leave happy.'

I loved waking up
next to Alex this morning.

And his dick.

I can't believe
I'm gonna walk out of this villa

boyfriend and girlfriend.
We're at it like fucking rabbits.

I'm having a great time.
Not like everyone else.

They're fucking at each other's
throat constantly.

I woke up this morning with Ash.

He's not the one
I'll spend my life with.

However, he is someone
I keep going back to

and I do have feelings for.

If he does fuck me over again,
it's gonna hurt me.

The bitch fights between
Kayleigh and Melissa are irrelevant.

The real argument is me.

I'm gonna go for Mel.
She's the prize all the lads want.

At the end of the day,
I'm gonna get her.

If all else fails,
I've got Kayleigh to fall back on.

We said nasty things yesterday that
I never thought I'd say to you.

I feel like Melissa is
getting isolated from the group

because of our problems
and I don't want that.

Sorry for kicking off.

She's made me feel shit,
insecure, left out,

since I've been in here.

Water under the bridge.

Let's be civil.
Yeah.

Kayleigh's being nice
cos I have shit on her.

She can go fuck herself.

I went on a date with Olivia
yesterday.

I don't know where she slept.

Anyone know where
she slept last night?

Whose bed? I dunno.

(laughter)

Sorry, Bear.

She weren't in your bed, was she?

Me and the villa.
Honestly, it's lonely.

I'm getting no attention
from no one.

(narrator)
'Not for the want of trying!'

Come on, girls!

Should we kiss?
No.

My game plan with Jess
is stick it on her straightaway.

Gonna kiss you. I fancy ya.

I like that Chloe.
She's pretty sassy.

I fancy ya.
Great chat.

I'm happy.

You know I'm the hottest?
In the world.

Wanna hear a secret?

Go on.
I fancy you, too.

Charlotte and Bear. Cher!

Lillie is fit.

Bear and Lillie. Billie.

My eyes are swaying, guys.

I want Chrysten.
I would love to fuck her brains out.

It's like a love story, me and you.

Now you're single, I wanna mingle.

Bear and Olivia. Bolivia.

I always want more.

Greedy Bear. Greedy Bear.

Aimee. She is gorgeous.

I'm gonna build bridges with her,
kiss her.

Giddy up, Aimee. Giddy up.

I had a flirt with Bear
but I'm confused by the situation.

'Do you know what?'

It's the last day, so maybe
I'll go in for a Bear hug.

I'm worried Gary's mugging me off.

I had every intention
of not going back to Gary,

but I just can't resist the parsnip.

Last night, we went to the bathroom
and were speaking for ages.

"I want to spend
the rest of my time with you."

"Why would you fall for Bear?"

Exactly.

Olivia is being so silly
at the moment.

She should know what Gaz is like
and not go back there.

But if I was her, I would.

It's easy to go back to
who you've slept with before.

I just think he has spent every time
with you apart from this one time.

Do you think I look like an idiot
going back?

It might look like you're an idiot.

But we all know you're not.

If the main person doesn't think
you're an idiot,

and that's Gaz.
Mm.

(narrator) 'Gaz and his parsnip are
gonna be the last things on your mind

when the next ex crops up.'

'T minus four hours.'

'Tablet of Terror is feeling naughty

and has sent Ash on a date with
Kayleigh's ex-best buddy, Melissa.'

Ready to have the best date ever?
We'll see.

We walk up to the date

and apparently we've got to plant
an orchid.

Like, what even is an orchid?
Orchid. Orc... Whatever it is.

Maybe if I do like you,

then I'm gonna have to give Kayleigh
some flowers to say sorry.

(chuckles) Some sympathy flowers?

I'm not gonna lie,
I do feel bad for Kayleigh.

But the competition for Mel
between the boys is too exciting.

And I am a winner.

I obviously like ya.

But cos I'm not allowed to...

You want it even more.
I want ya.

Kayleigh destroyed our friendship
and I'm never gonna forgive that.

So me kissing Ash
will be the perfect payback.

You always wanted me. Come on.
A little bit.

Since that first time...

But I've got to think...

Last time I kissed you,

you went back to the villa
and mugged me off

by getting with someone else.

How do I know you're not gonna
do that again?

Melissa's playing hard to get.

I decide to turn up the charm.
We know where this will go.

You're like the prize in the villa.
The forbidden fruit.

And if I did kiss you
and we did get on,

then I'd love to give you
a present later

cos you deserve one.

You should water my plant
and make it wet.

It'll be nothing compared
to later on.

I knew Melissa liked me, but
I didn't think it'd be this easy.

Can you read that out?
"To Kayleigh."

"Sorry I took your man.
He's mine now."

It is so hard to resist Ash
cos, if I'm honest,

he's completely my type.

I like you dead dirty.

Oh, you like...

Oh, my God. Listen.

If you're gonna play that game...

Melissa thinks I'm dirty now,

wait till she gets me
in the bedroom later.

Sorry, Kayleigh. I've done it again.

(tablet dings)

(all sigh)

Fuck you.
I've already got two psycho exes,

don't give me a-fucking-nother one.

"Afternoon, all stars and exes."

"Don't get too comfortable."

"It's time for Lillie, Olivia
and Kayleigh to head to the beach."

No, Tablet of Terror.
Have you not done enough?

Fuck my life!

I am fuming. I just can't be
bothered with it being my ex.

It would ruin things
with me and Gaz.

Too much has happened in here.

I am already having a shit day.

Tablet of Terror has sent
Melissa and Ash on a date.

Again, Kayleigh looks like
the stupid fucking mug.

I'm so nervous.

Every single night I say,
"This can't get any worse for me."

And it's got worse.

I think that this is gonna be
a complete spanner in the works.

I don't think
it's gonna be anyone we expect.

Whatever prick comes out,
it's not gonna be good.

The beach surprises me every time.
I always think I have an idea

and then round comes someone
out of the blue

and you think,
"Where the fuck did you come from?"

If it's any of your exes,
who do you think?

There's James.
He's my most serious ex.

I hate that boy. I hate him so much.
I can't be around him.

I swear to God,
if he walks out of that sea,

I will flick him back in.

Remove yourself. You're not welcome.

My worst would be Adam.

There's other exes I've got

but I don't think they affect me
as much as this date can.

Point isn't that Ash
is gonna get with Mel.

The point is two people
are at a test.

If they fail,
that's two people out of my life.

My worst would be Jude.

There has only been one person
I've seen since Gary and I broke up.

I don't want him
to rock up on that beach.

I'm in a shit mood anyway,

so if it's my ex, I'll be like,
"Fuck off!"

Ash and Mel.
For me, it's a tricky one.

If he kisses her,
she will 100 per cent kiss back.

She don't give a fuck.

If they actually have,
Kayleigh's gonna lose her shit.

I'm 100 per cent Team Kayleigh.
I absolutely adore her.

So if Mel's kissed Ashley,
I'll be fucking fuming.

And Kayleigh is gonna hit
the fucking roof.

(all cheering)

This can be for you, Charlotte,
but I should take the note out.

Do you wanna know
what the note read?

Yeah.
"Sorry, Kayleigh."

"He was your man,
but he's mine now."

(all) Oh!
Did yous kiss?

Yeah.

I think Mel is a fucking bitch.

She loves herself so much
and she's not even pretty.

Do you reckon you'll be
getting cained or what?

I'll do what I want.

When Kayleigh returns,
hopefully it will push Mel away.

My opportunity to swoop in.

I swear to God, this fucking villa
is gonna be fucked tonight.

Oh, I just... Oh.
This is a bad day for you.

Fucking hell.

Everything from the water
has been dog shite.

So I'm expecting another dog
to come out

and provide shit
to go back into the villa.

Being at the beach
is never a good situation to be in.

I'm absolutely shitting my pants.

Who the hell is coming out
of the sea?

(sighs)

Oh, my God, it's Joss!
Hello.

Hi.
Girls.

Joss Mooney walked out of the sea
and he's mine and Kayleigh's ex.

With me, it was just sex.

(chuckles)

You all right?

Great! Another ex. Another problem.

How are you? You all right?

Nice tan.
I know, right?

A little Action Man.

Did you pack that?
No, this is me.

It's all natural.

(narrator) 'Blond bombshell Joss
is back from series one.'

Oh, dear.

'Last time,
he arrived as Talitha's ex

and caused trouble with her
and Ash.'

What would you do if he found out
about our kiss?

Ash. Ash.

'But it was Farah
who stole his heart.'

Last time I was on Ex On The Beach,
I got too comfortable.

I settled down with one girl.

This time, I'm single,
back in my element.

If there's a girl I like,
I'm gonna go for her.

So, how long were you and Kayleigh
together for?

Six months?

Eight months.

Eight months, to be precise.
OK.

It was a great relationship.

But he cheated on me. I'm over it.

Kayleigh's getting with Ash.
God.

Kayleigh and Ash.
It's not really an issue.

Ash is a mate.
Kayleigh can do what she wants.

(tablet dings)

Fuck off.

"Welcome to the beach, Joss.
It's date time for you and Lillie."

"A chance to stir the senses
and melt each other's hearts.'

Fresh piece of meat. Looks tasty.
Can't wait to get my claws in.

Do what you wanna do.

If you kiss him,
it honestly would not bother me.

Kayleigh's given me the all-clear.
So, game on. See what happens.

Right, Lills. Come on.

Let's go for our date.
Have fun, guys.

I'm in a predicament

because however Ash has behaved
on his date,

determines how I behave with Ashley.

We're having a white party tonight.
Everyone looks sick. Whoo!

I don't know what to tell you.

Calm before the storm.

Let's toast to
the calm before the storm.

(Hawley) I'm buzzing. Hopefully
everyone will have a good time.

Can't see it happening.

When Kayleigh comes in,
you're telling her we kissed.

I can't be arsed talking to her.

Everybody might need to wear black.
It might be my funeral.

Kayleigh's been shitting herself
about it.

She's got a reason to, now.
(squeals)

What a fucking bitch you are!

You're only fucking doing this
to piss Kayleigh off.

You are a twat.

If we said we're friends,
then Ash would be off limits.

But civil isn't friends, so...

Bring it on, baby. (giggles)

Well, this is awkward.

It's Kayleigh's ex.
I can see in her eyes. It's Joss.

I walk back in, I see Melissa
and her smug little face

and I'm thinking
something's definitely happened.

Kayleigh's been crying.

He's on a date with Lillie.

I think Kayleigh knows by the look
on Melissa's face what's happened.

Do you wanna talk?
You look like you're gonna cry.

Do you know what? Fuck everyone.

I don't want to be here.
Everyone in there can fuck off.

I think she's just upset about
thinking about you guys.

I don't know what's happened.
She's had a shit day.

I realised there's more emotion
there for her.

Do you know what's gone on?
Basically, I kissed Ash today.

What the fuck? Why would you
wanna get with that skank?

You promised her
you wouldn't get with anyone else.

I run outside.

Kayleigh is crying her eyes out.

Please speak to me.

(sobbing)

We all expected Kayleigh to be
fucking guns blazing, fuming.

I did not expect my girl
to be crying her eyes out.

Ash and Mel should feel like shit.
You're both pricks.

All I'm saying is she's broken.

So...
You knew what it would do, Ash.

Listen, if I come back
with half my face cut off

you'll realise what happened.

It's more serious than I thought.
I need to speak to her.

It's horrible seeing you like this.

I knew this was gonna happen.

I'm hysterically crying
and all I see in the corner of my eye

is that man's flip flops.
What the fuck is he doing here?

What do you want to say to me
that I don't already know?

Get the fuck away from me!

(narrator)
'With Ash's night in tatters,

whose life will be shredded to pieces

with the arrival
of another unwanted ex?'

'Whose ex is next?'

It's amazing. Do you wanna try some?

'Looks like things
are getting a little sticky.'

We're making chocolate.
We've got silly hats on.

It's so much fun.
It's exactly what I needed.

What are we writing on this?

OK.
How do you feel right now?

You want me to write that out?

Oh, I know what it is already!

What a way to start a first date.

I say, "What's the first word
that comes into your head?"

Typical guy. "Horny."

The date is going amazing.
I look like a right doughnut.

I'm sure I'm going to be
licking chocolate off Lillie soon.

In my mouth, OK?
Just in your mouth.

In and around your mouth.
I'm joking.

I'm getting good vibes.
Fuck it. I'm going in for the kiss.

Typical.

He tried to give me a kiss.

I didn't feel comfortable
doing that.

Obviously very horny
and definitely very excited.

(both chuckle)

I do fancy Lillie
despite the funny hats.

Wicked girl. Really attractive.

Thank you.

After tonight,
I feel really confused.

Joss is lovely,
but I think I still fancy Bear.

Kaleigh needs to come in here
and show Melissa who's boss.

Kayleigh actually had a little bit
of faith in Mel today.

And what has she gone and done?
Fucking mugged her off.

Melissa's got no friends.
She's a bitch.

I've got no friends
and I'm a bitch?

Yes, babe.

She doesn't care
that she's got no friends.

She just wants to cause shit.

She doesn't give a fuck.

How the fuck am I a bitch
when you're the one

who fucks someone's ex?
Have I fucked guys since I got in?

I don't know, Lillie.
You've got loyalty to that girl.

She's your friend.

Four months ago, best friends.
Cuts me off.

I've got so much anger for Kayleigh
cos we were fucking good friends

and she can fuck me off so quickly,

and then expects me
to still have loyalties

when I go on a date with Ash.

No, ta, love.

Kayleigh's told us different.

Kaleigh will...
Kayleigh will tell you what?

Wow.

We're talking about
what we fell out about.

You're a dirty little tramp.
Dirty tramp?

Don't complain to me
that you ever want to be my friend.

I don't want
to be your friend ever.

That's why I kissed Ash.

Fuck off, dirty little slut.

Mel knows mine and Ash's history
so for her to use that,

she's a sly little slut.

And as far as I'm concerned,

she's laid her bed,
she can fucking lie in it.

Do you want to talk to Kayleigh?
I don't want to talk to her.

What the fuck?

Fucking God! I swear! Melissa!

She has fucked it now.

Honestly, yeah.
I spoke to you this morning.

We need to be civil.
Shut up!

I spoke to you this morning.

You didn't say
you wanna be my friend, no?

Kayleigh's shouting this shit at me.
It's the same broken record.

She can fuck herself.

You said you wanted to be civil!

So I'll fucking be civil with you!

When I argue, I'm vicious.

If something hurts you,
that's what I will attack.

You're a fucking slag!

(both shouting and swearing)

You've got tits like dogs' ears.

You've got fake fucking tits!

Is this a fucking joke?

You need a man to stand by you.

I don't need him to.

In life, you can't do shit.

Who the fuck are ya?
I need him to...

This wasn't about him.
This is about you.

Ash is stood in the middle
and he looks embarrassed

to have Melissa as someone he chose
over someone like me.

I thought you had more...

Fuck off, you slag!

You're a mess.
Fuck you!

You are an absolute mess.

It looks like a Westlife music video
gone terribly wrong.

That's what you want?
That's what you want?

I thought our fucking friendship
meant more than that trollop!

'Kayleigh's taking a break
from the group,

just in time to avoid ex Joss's
stylish entrance.'

I walk in with Lillie
and this place is insane.

So, how was the date, then?
It was good, mate.

Good. Decent.

Mate, you look really cool
in your stupid fucking chef's hat.

Did yous kiss?

Yes.
Yeah, we had a little kiss.

(all) Whoo!

I'm so happy that Lillie and Joss
have kissed

and now me and Gaz
are going to have a great night.

(narrator) 'Don't hold your breath.
This is Ex On The Beach.'

'Anyone can show up
and turn your world upside down.'

'Whose ex is next?'

(cackles evilly)

(tablet dings, all groan)

I started to think
it was such a good night.

"Date time in the penthouse for
Melissa and a man of her choice."

Yes!

"After all, it's your birthday."

Is it your birthday?

Yeah, it's my birthday.

Happy birthday! (laughs)

I couldn't give a fuck
if it's her birthday or not.

No one wants
to celebrate her existence.

It's between... Ash or Gaz.

Melissa, you've got enough shit
going on, believe me,

without trying to fuck me.

I don't know.

Ash.

Are you having to decide
between me and Gaz?

Fuck her, I'm gonna have fun tonight.

We had a good date today.

You had a chance to take me
to the penthouse.

You chose... "Hm, I don't know.
Gaz or Ashley."

I've known Gaz...
I'm not finished yet.

I fucking love you guys.
You love me.

Whoever wants to go to the penthouse,
keep it to them self.

I'm partying.
Let's get the fucking drinks in.

(all cheer)

(shouts)

(cheering)

I'm so proud of him in saying,
"No, Melissa. The joke's on you."

Mel turns on the waterworks.

Babe, no one gives a fuck.
We're having a well good pool party.

Everyone's ganging up on me.
It isn't fair.

This is the worst fucking birthday.

(gang cheering)

(narrator)
'As Mel's night looking over...'

'Bear's is just beginning.'

To the penthouse, get up there.
Sexy time tonight, baby!

(panting)

'...and not wanting to miss out,

Ash is cooking up something
with Kayleigh.'

I'm sorry for what I did,
but it was for a reason.

At the end of the day,
I could've gone along with it

and then let Mel...

So, what? Today was for this reason?

I don't even fancy her.
I don't like blonde.

I swear to God.
You're such a dickhead!

(shrieks)

No! I hate you!

Give me a kiss.
No!

As last days go,
this has been good.

I woke up next to Bear
so I'm pretty happy.

(hums)

Last night with Aimee
was a bit of fun.

Lillie is the girl of my dreams,
but I can't sleep with her.

That's why I banged Aimee,
got the heebie-jeebies out.

I'm reset again. I want to get
my Princess Lillie back.

Waking up this morning
after yesterday's shitty day

I actually feel
surprisingly relieved.

Last night,
the group really came together

and demonstrated karma is a bitch.

This morning, go to breakfast,

sit by myself.
No one's fucking talking to me.

What a great birthday.

The wrong person.

This cunt.

Ashley!

Last night, I fucking smashed it!

Think I was gonna let Mel
mug me off?

I told that sketty Betty
to get back down to the penthouse

while I gave Kayleigh
the best night of her life.

I feel like I've got
to say something after last night.

You disrespect me like that again,

and I'll fucking rip
your eyeballs out, OK, babe?

I hate him with a passion.

(narrator) 'As it's the last day,

the Tablet of Terror
is throwing a party...'

Yeah! It's a fucking beach party!

'...for everyone's favourite
birthday girl.'

Wow!

We're having a fucking ball
at the beach party.

Shame it's fucking
Mel Reeves's birthday. Fuck's sake.

(all cheer)

Happy birthday, Mel.
Everyone fucking hates ya.

I fancy Lillie.
I'm gonna try and rekindle things.

Everyone makes mistakes, don't they?

Bear said he wants to spend
tonight with me.

I'm aware of what Bear's like.
But I am here to have fun.

So, why not?

As it's the last night, like.
I don't care about fucking birds.

Just want to give you a cuddle.
I miss ya.

He was with me last night.

You're lucky you're pretty.

We're back on. Best day ever.

(narrator) 'With Melissa
now the pariah of the group,

it's time for Hawley to swoop in.'

My plan is to get with Melissa.
I'm going to take my chance.

I think you came in here
towards the end.

Everyone's in a tight group.

When it kicks off,
they go to Kayleigh.

It's pathetic.
The type of people that do that.

They've just stuck with Kayleigh
and not tried to get to know me.

Made me feel awkward. Fuck them.

It's not nice to see you upset
on your birthday.

I wouldn't wish it on anyone.

I'm having the worst time ever.

I hate it. I'm bored.
I've got no good company.

Shit birthday.

(narrator) 'Nice try.
You should get some tips from Bear. '

I look over
and Bear's kissing Lillie.

She's a fucking mug. I feel sick.

How dare Bear think
he can just mug me off?

It's not happening.
I will get payback.

Bear has really fucked me off.
He's used me to make Lillie jealous.

And to, basically, have sex.

How the fuck can you
do that to someone?

Why are you such a prick?

Bear deserved that. He's ridiculous.

What's wrong?
You're the biggest mug.

OK. Why's that?

You slept with me last night

and today you're cracking on
with Lillie.

Awkward.

Me and Lillie had a thing.
It was really special.

She went through a tough time
with Gaz

and I'm not going to be a rebound.

Bear, your ego is as big as my dick.
Pipe down, you silly little cunt.

You came, we slept together.

Love, I'm sorry I said
I'd spend the day with you today.

This morning, you were with me.

What do you expect?
Me to like someone and stay?

I'm Bear.

Yeah, I do lie in the villa.
I can't help it.

You're a twat.
The thing is...

I'm over it. Get over yourself.

I'm done with Bear. What a wanker.

(narrator) 'As it's the last night,
in true Ex On The Beach style,

the Tablet of Terror has thrown
an awards ceremony

to celebrate the villa's
many achievements.'

I think we need to toast.

To a lot of fun, drama
and a good night.

It's been a pleasure being here!
(all cheer)

'Don't tell me you've forgotten
this lot already.'

Oh, for...

You called her a dog earlier.
Oops. Sorry, Bear.

(shouting)

You're such a fucking wanker.

(shouting)

(all laugh)

I don't kiss people on first dates.

She is a fun sponge.

Don't push me again!
Fuck off!

Just fuck off! I mean it, fuck off!

Where am I gonna go?

I'm looking for the four Fs.

Fit, fun, flirty
and fucking massive tits.

Liam is so irritating.

I'll call it a day with Olivia.
Getting fucking nowhere.

I'm absolutely gutted.
I'm sick as a cunt.

Fucking king, baby! Look!
Hold tight!

The girls won't shake our hands,
let alone suck our dicks.

Come here. Give me a kiss.

It leaves me to swoop in
and crack on with Chrysten.

I'm a new Jemma.
Blondes have more fun.

Guys, would you like to show me
the penthouse?

Right, who wants to finger me?

The love of my life is here...

You fucked me off, Hawley.
Broke my heart.

(arguing)

First, most likely to win
a Nobel prize.

Do you know what that means?
(all) No!

Anyone want to explain?

I think it means actress or actrum.

(narrator)
'Actrum? Is that a new word?'

I don't know what it means.

A Nobel prize is
the biggest peacekeeper.

Nobel Peace Award, yeah.

(both) You.
Thank you very much.

My experience in the villa
has been fucking crazy.

But I've loved it.

I've not got into any fights.
Wicked.

Biggest ego in the villa?

It's Gaz.
Come on, man.

(others agree)

Bear, if you could have sex
with yourself, you would.

How have I got a big ego?

I haven't.

You do talk about yourself
quite a lot.

If you're going to play the ego game,
let's play.

I've got more followers
than all of yous combined, times two.

(narrator) 'No ego there.'

Worst drunk in the villa.

(all) Holly!
Yeah!

Stop touching me! Get off me!

Get the fuck away from me!

(laughter)

I am so fucking proud of that!
Best drunk ever!

OK. Biggest bitch.

It's obviously Mel.

You're a dirty old cow.

You're a fucking slag.
You fucked everyone!

Who the fuck does she think she is?

Fucking droopy-ass tits slag.

I agree.

I think I'm the biggest bitch.

It was shit anyway.

Who do you think is the most boring?

Conor!

Conor!
(woman)No, no, no.

Conor's the most boring.

He's the most boring.
All he does is chat shit all day.

He's a roofer, on peanuts.
So I'm not bothered.

I'll do his wage in a day.
He earns all my wage in one day.

Congratulations, millionaire!

Sorry I'm skint and get the birds.

Conor, I may not have no money,

but I'll still fuck your mum
and your sister.

I'll give you 50 per cent off
if you want your roof done.

'There. The dickhead discount.'

Who do you think is the
biggest fucking wanker in the villa?

Gaz, for what he's done to Lillie.

While Gaz was with Lillie,
did you get together?

Yes.

I'm actually, like, gobsmacked.
I'm thrown.

Melissa Reeves.
Why is that so bad?

That's one of the people
I slept with behind your back.

Conor, you're one that calls
people out on their jobs back home.

Mate, you pour drinks for girls
in a nightclub.

I'm just saying...

For Lillie's situation.

That's all.
Don't take it personally.

Conor... Shut up.
It's only for me.

If you want to go in,
next time you need a lift to work,

I can take you, in my Bentley.

(narrator) 'Still no ego, then.'

Who is the prom queen?
Charlotte Dawson.

Need a fucking crown!

Give her the crown!

My dad, Les, would be
so chuffing proud of me right now.

Last one is a biggie.

Prom king. All right?

But, erm,
I entered the villa as the king,

and I'm gonna leave it that way.

I walked in here saying
I was king of the villa

and my time here
has proved it.

I'm leaving wearing my crown.

I love you!

(narrator) 'With the last night
coming to an end,

Gaz puts his ego aside

and makes one final heartfelt gesture
to Lillie.'

I wanted to pull Lillie to the side

to make sure
we are leaving as friends.

I've had a lot of stuff go on here
with the whole, like,

Chrysten and Mel
and the fact I cheated on you.

And the other night
when you were crying,

like, that does, I hope,
still prove that I care about you.

Gary's eyes are filling up
talking to me. He's sincere.

I'm sorry, so sorry I cheated on you.

I honestly...
I'll always care about you a lot.

You'd think after all
the chats we've had

it would get easier,
but, in a way, it gets harder.

We had some of the best times ever

and I'm sorry that things
came out in here.

I actually wish now
that when I finished with Lillie,

I had told her I had cheated on her

because coming out
in this environment was not easy.

I fucked it a few times.

I've been caught out
and I'm sorry about that.

The rest of our relationship
was real.

I just hope that
what I've done to Lillie

hasn't scarred her and
affected the way she is with lads.

I didn't think I had
any more tears left to cry.

That's my fault.

I came here to get closure
with Gary.

It hasn't been the easiest journey

but I'm going to be going home
a much stronger person.

Who the fuck wears knickers?

Have I got a good one?

That boy has fucked it with me.

Shitter.

It's about we just drew a line
and she would fuck off.

You've got tits like dogs' ears.
Fuck off, you dirty little slut.