Catfish: The TV Show (2012–…): Season 8, Episode 48 - Kailan & Jordan - full transcript

After 12 years, Kailan is finally ready to take her on-again off-again relationship with Jordan to the next level. But that all comes to a head when Nev and Kamie discover the man Kailan's been in love with is not a man at all.

- We've got Kailan and Jordan.
Met when they were 10 or 11 years old.
- Do you feel like you love Jordan?
- Yes.
He's every single thing I want in a man.
- Oh, we got a Twitter account. - [gasps]
- Tahj. - Who the hell is Tahj?
- Something's going on here.
There's no evidence that a Jordan exists anywhere.
- Over the years, though--like, 12 years, really?
- Oh!
- Oh, [bleep]. - Hello. Who's there?
[intense music]
♪ ♪
All right. Well, call time was 7:30 today.
A little early. Kamie's still not here.
I was gonna keep waiting before I had my breakfast,
but it's getting cold.
Oh!
Look who decided to show up. What's up, Biggie?
There she is. [chuckles]
Looks like she's going to the couch.
It's not that early. Come on.
- It's early enough! I'm not a morning person, Nev.
You know this about me.
Thank you.
I just get a little angry when I don't have my iced coffee
immediately when I wake up.
- Shall we? - We shall.
Come on, Biggie.
- All right. Oh, we got an email.
Here we go. Here's an email from Kailan.
"Hey, Nev and Kamie. I'm in a bit of a dilemma.
"I met this guy named Jordan in a teen chat room site
"12 years ago,
"and just by conversation,
"our relationship skyrocketed.
"We messaged all the time
"and started talking on the phone for hours.
"We were obsessed with each other,
"and as we got older, we flirted more and more
and started having feelings for each other."
- ♪ I can give you love like, love like ♪
♪ You ain't never seen in your life, your life ♪
- "Currently, I'm 23, and I live in Indiana.
"He's 22 and live in Orlando, Florida.
"So I guess it makes sense that it would be hard to meet.
"But after being on and off for all these years,
"we are now most definitely on.
"He's the constant in my life,
"my first online friend and my ideal man.
"He understands me, and now that we're older,
I'm ready to meet the love of my life."
- ♪ I can give you love like, love like ♪
- "But we've tried to meet up twice before.
"Both times, I flew to Florida,
"only to be stood up.
"Not to mention,
"I can't understand why he doesn't want to FaceTime
"or, recently, even talk on the phone.
"It leaves me feeling uneasy about who he really is.
- Same, sis.
- "We talk about a future together,
"including marriage and babies.
"But I'm still worried.
"Would you guys please help me shake this feeling
"so I can love him freely without these thoughts?
Kailan."
- Um, I think the thoughts that Kailan has are right on point.
- Let's send a little texty-text to Kailan.
- To Kailan. Reporting for duty.
- So wait a second. Kailan is 23.
- Mm-hmm. - And they met 12 years ago.
That's a--that means she was 11.
- Exactly. - And he was ten.
Are people catfishing at ten?
- Who knows what Jordan told Kailan when they first met.
- Right. - I'm sure they weren't saying,
"Hi, I'm Kailan.
I'm 12 years old." They were saying, "22."
- Oh, you think they were both lying to each other
when they first met?
- Were you not on chat rooms when you were--
- No, I wasn't. I never did. - Well, I was.
I was always 21.
- Oh, she wrote back. "Hey, guys.
Oh my God, are you guys coming to save the day?"
- Absolutely. - "Come in our Zoom."
- We should be back-to-back.
Hey!
- Hey.
- What's up, Kailan? - Hey. What's up, what's up?
- Did you grow up in Indiana? - Yes, I did. I grew up here.
- What do you do for work?
- I'm a mail carrier. I'm a mail lady.
- Let's do a test. - See if he'll bark at her?
- Biggie, look. She's a--she's a mailwoman.
- [laughs] - What do you think?
- What do you think? Can you tell? Can you tell?
- I gotta have my uniform on.
- Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. - It's the uniform.
- Very cool.
- Yeah, but I went to school for a year.
I did pre-med. - Why did you stop?
- I got pregnant.
I got pregnant with my daughter.
- Wow. - So how old's your daughter?
- She's three now.
- Were you dating her father? - I was at the time.
But, um,
she's not my only kid.
I have twin boys.
- Wow. How old are they? - They are one.
- And you're no longer with their father.
- Mm-mm. Not at all.
- You have a lot on your plate. - I do.
- Geez. And then Jordan, who's...
- Then Jordan.
He's in the midst of all that. He was just always there.
- Well, so, the first thing I said to Kamie
when I read the email was,
if you guys met when he was 10 and you were 11,
hard to imagine what he might have lied about.
Were you on there as yourself, being honest?
- No. I was on there saying I was 18.
- See?
- How old did he say he was?
- He was 19. - See?
- So what if he really was 19?
- Ew. - Ew. Right.
- I feel like people expected,
on any chat room, that everyone was lying...
- Right.
- About their age and their location.
For sure. - Yeah.
- So what kind of chat room was this?
- Me and Jordan was talking in an astrology chat room.
- What's his sign? - Guess.
- Oh, I don't know,
'cause I don't know anything about him.
Don't tell me he's a Cancer. - No. He's a Taurus.
- I mean, it would explain why he hasn't shown up yet,
'cause Taurus are notoriously lazy.
- [laughs]
- Just sort of take us back
and, like, tell us the whole story.
- Okay, so me and Jordan met in a chat room,
and we just started talking, learning about each other,
as far as, like, the simple stuff.
And then we really got deep in there.
- So--okay, so you met in the chat room,
and then what?
- We switched over to Kik.
Then I ended up getting my own phone,
and it turned into phone calls, late at night.
- And how would you describe the way Jordan sounds?
- Well, you know, puberty--
it was the little kid voice,
so it sounded like a female. I ain't gonna lie.
- Mmm. Mm-hmm.
- Did you ever feel like he was your boyfriend?
- At a point, we were dating.
Around, like, freshman year,
called each other boyfriend and girlfriend.
And then, since then, we were on and off.
But every single time, y'all--every single time,
the vibe never left.
It was like, we just pick up where we left off.
- Wait a second, so--okay, so you met in the chat room,
and then you said you guys switched over to Kik.
When you were in high school, did you guys...
- It was more--
- Connect on other social media?
- Well, we connected on Snapchat,
but he never really posted himself.
He was posting quotes.
- What do you know about him?
- What does he do? Like, what's his job?
- His life. - Yeah, tell us about Jordan.
- He said he was doing construction at the time.
And then he ended up quitting his job
and started focusing on stocks.
- So when you were dating your ex and you got pregnant,
how was that for you to have to tell Jordan?
- I was scared.
I didn't want to lose the relationship we had, you know?
And when I finally just said,
"Forget it, I'ma just tell him,"
he was more excited than me.
He was happy for me.
Then the twins came.
That's when I'm like, "Aww, I'm finna lose him this time,
'cause what the [bleep]," you know?
When I told him about the twins,
when I tell you he made me start accepting it--
- Whoa.
- It was amazing how he helped me
get through the whole situation.
"Everything happens for a reason."
That's what he told me.
- Do you feel like you love Jordan?
- Yeah.
- Have you guys said that you love each other?
- Yes, we have.
He actually was the first to say it.
I just feel like he understands me
more than any man that I have ever dealt with.
He's every single thing I want in a man.
- I mean, I'm trying to find something
not to like about this guy.
He seems great.
- But he has said he was gonna see you.
- Mmm.
- And you went to Florida twice?
- Yep. I went to Miami before that.
I texted him, "I want to see you."
And he was all, "Okay, yeah. That's dope.
We're gonna walk the beach. We're gonna do all this."
And I get there, he's like, "Oh, I got work."
I was a little upset, but I didn't want it
to ruin the trip, so I just let it go.
- And then was there another time
that you went to Florida? - Yes.
In 2019, I actually went to Orlando.
He was like, "Sorry something came up last time.
I have to see you this time."
And I was out there for three days.
Didn't text me back. Didn't call me. Nothing.
I was pissed off.
I stopped talking to him for two months.
That's when I started thinking, like, something's not right.
- So I think we have to assume that either
he doesn't live in Orlando,
or he's not the guy in the pictures.
Those are the first two, most obvious reasons
why he might not show up.
Have you asked to FaceTime?
- I have. - Why hadn't that happened?
- He would be like, "Okay, I'ma call you tonight,"
and never call.
- Classic.
And do you talk on the phone now?
- He hasn't been calling me at all.
- When was the last time you spoke to Jordan on the phone?
- When we were kids. - Like, five, six years ago?
- Yeah. - Oh, my God.
So for six or seven years,
you guys haven't talked on the phone.
- We didn't talk on the phone. - Wow.
- How does he explain that?
- He's busy. - That's weird.
Have you ever pressed him on it and said,
you know, like, "What's up?"
- I pressed him on the phone calls.
Recently, I told him "I'm upset,
"because you keep saying you're gonna call me. You never did."
- Do you have any messages or pictures that we can see?
- Yeah. - Show us the goods.
Okay, great. - Oh, wait.
- Okay. Wait. Let's-- - Is that him? Cute.
- Go up a little bit. Okay, here we go.
- Ooh! - What?
"Lol, don't test my pullout game.
I got that in any position."
And you said, "[bleep], I can't wait.
Def want you to [bleep] me the [bleep] out."
- Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
- I need a green flag. - Oh, my God.
- I need a green flag.
- "Gonna have to give me a baby,
the way you talking, lol.
I'ma wear you out on the first night.
I'll be surprised if you can keep up."
- Ooh. - "I'm not pulling out." Wow.
- You said, "Get me pregnant,
we are getting married for real."
- He said he wouldn't mind getting married to you.
- I know, right?
- So yeah, sexting aside, he has expressed to you
that he wants to be your husband
and potentially have more kids.
- Yes.
- All right, well, let's figure this out,
'cause you've obviously been waiting a long time.
- Yeah. 'Cause I'm not for these games at all.
I need to know.
- All right, so hang tight.
We will hit you up once we find something.
- Okay. Thank you, guys.
- All right, Kailan. - Of course.
- Appreciate you. - Talk soon.
- Man. - Wow.
- My initial thought is maybe when they met on the chat room,
Jordan was honest about how old he was. Right?
- She assumed they both lied about how old they are.
- Right.
- But there's a chance he didn't.
- Right.
- The other possibility is that Jordan
was a young woman when they met,
and the reason that they stopped talking on the phone
was because her voice
didn't change into sounding like an adult male voice.
- Oh, God.
- Jordan has something good things going for him,
but there are obviously some major red flags.
[dramatic music]
- All right. Let's see what we can find.
What do you think we're gonna find?
What are the... planets telling you?
- It's some bull[bleep]. [both laughing]
- So here's what we've got.
We've got Kailan and Jordan in their early 20s,
who met when they were 10 or 11 years old.
Communication was started
initially just through a chat room.
Then it moved to Kik, and then it moved to text and talk.
They talked on the phone a lot,
and then stopped talking on the phone,
but stayed in touch over the years,
and are now very seriously looking to meet up
and start a life together.
But, you know, he won't FaceTime.
- Mm-hmm. - She's been to Florida twice,
once to Miami, where he was gonna meet her,
and then once to Orlando,
and he ghosted.
So something's up. - Right.
- Okay, so let's just start with some basics.
All right, we got an email.
"Hey, Nev and Kamie. Thanks for taking my case.
"Here's everything I know on Jordan.
Pics attached."
His name is Jordan Hammel. He lives in Orlando, Florida.
Here's his number, his Snapchat,
"and as far as I know, he doesn't have any other
"social media, and that's all I have.
"Let me know if you have any questions.
I'm so glad you're on this."
All right, let's start with pictures.
All right, we got the first one,
in his car with his seatbelt across.
[tense music]
No hits there.
♪ ♪
Here's another photo.
Okay, no hits there.
And then here's a weird one
that's, like, been color edited.
- That was at the times, you know.
- Right. That was a thing.
All right, so nothing on the images, which is good.
It's not like he's some model guy or famous vlogger.
- My initial thought is we have to check Cashapp
and run the number there,
'cause he's had this number for forever, so...
- That's true.
- He should have something set up through the number.
- Right. Okay.
All right, so let's take this phone number,
and let's run it in our Cashapp.
321-[bleep].
- [gasps]
Tahj.
- Oh, that's the same Snapchat. [bleep]-shots.
- Snapchat. - So that's definitely him.
- But who the [bleep] is Tahj?
- Well, I mean, who knows? But that's--you were right.
- That's a good--yes. - That's a good first clue.
- Mm-hmm.
- Jordan has a Cashapp with the same username as the Snapchat,
but his first name on here appears to be Tahj.
Why isn't it Jordan?
Now that we know he uses the [bleep]-shots username,
let's do a little bit of searching on that.
- Oh!
- Stocktwits. He's a stock guy, right?
- Right. Hmm.
- Okay, so--uh, okay, but it did show up
as a username on a stock trading website,
which, again, makes sense.
- This is his favorite username, obviously.
- Right. So let's look up the Snapchat
and just see if there's anything on there.
I mean, she's obviously done that.
- Mm-hmm.
- But what does the Snapchat look like?
[bleep]-shots.
Hmm. "Wavy."
- No picture.
- Yeah, nothing.
All right, so wait a second. What else?
Hold on. Let's go back to the email.
All right, let's do a phone search then.
It should come up to Jordan Hammel, right?
All right, let's do it on Spokeo.
Click "phone search" here.
- Tahj! Hammel.
- Wow. Wow!
- Old address is Florida. - Orlando.
Okay, so there was a time
when this number was registered to Orlando.
Okay. Well, this is good. We're getting somewhere here.
Oh! We got a Twitter account.
- Okay.
- What is this?
"Slim eye Tahj."
Miami Beach. Interesting.
This is obviously-- what are you seeing?
- What are you not seeing? - Wha--I don't know.
Oh.
That's a woman.
Right. Okay. Well, hold on a second.
And then here's-- this is the same person?
- Mm-hmm. - Okay.
Well, this is good. We're getting somewhere.
- Right. - So this is the Facebook
account that comes up associated to the number.
This can't be a total mistake, because the Cashapp says Tahj,
and now the phone number's coming back to a Tahj.
Look, the URL even says "tahj.hammel."
And there's an Instagram account, "tahj mahall."
- Rainbow.
- Well, if Tahj is a lesbian...
- Maybe when she was younger,
she was trying to experiment with...
- Maybe. - Her sexuality.
- Now, this is all connected to the phone number.
If he got the phone number when he was a kid...
- Mm-hmm.
- Which, presumably he did, obviously...
- Mm-hmm.
- It might come up under a family member name.
- Could be a family plan. - Could this be his sister?
- I was literally going to say they kind of look alike.
They look like they could be related.
- What do you--right. Yeah.
Maybe Jordan has a sister,
and the phone number traces back to her.
Her name seems to be connected to all this.
- I wonder if she follows a Jordan.
- Mm.
I have to bring it up on my phone to do this search.
All right, now Following...
and then let's search "Jordan."
Hmm. All right, well we're on to something here.
There's obviously a connection.
The phone number is connected to a Cashapp,
and on the Cashapp, the name is Tahj,
which seemed very strange.
Then, we ran the phone number,
and it came back registered to Tahj Hammel,
a woman, it would appear.
- Mm-hmm.
- Now, could be a sister.
But the weird thing is there's no evidence
that a Jordan Hammel exists anywhere.
- No.
- Like, if that's your number...
- Mm-hmm.
- Why would your sister come up?
- Mm-hmm.
- Why wouldn't you be in the mix somewhere?
- Mm-hmm. Right. - I don't know.
- Well, Kailan said it herself: when she first spoke
to Jordan on the phone, that she thought
she could have been talking to a girl.
- Let's not ignore the good news,
which is that the name Hammel...
- Mm-hmm.
- Is associated with the number.
- Mm-hmm.
- But the name Tahj is something
that Jordan hasn't told Kailan about.
So there's clearly been some lying happening here,
and if there's one lie,
who knows how many lies there could be?
[dramatic music]
[dark music]
- All right. Day two.
- Cheers.
- Cashapp was a great idea, which gave us our first clue.
- Tahj. - Tahj.
Which we then saw again
with the phone number reverse search.
Hammel does seem to be consistently the last name
associated with Jordan/Tahj Hammel.
But the only connected social media
appears to be for a woman.
- Tahj Hammel.
- I think we should just start by calling Kailan,
going through everything that we discovered yesterday.
[phone line trilling]
Hello.
- Hey. Good morning. It's Nev.
- And Kamie. - And Kamie.
We've got some things we want to talk about.
So give us a minute, and we'll be ready in the Zoom.
- See you in a minute. - See you. Are you ready?
Let's talk to Kailan.
♪ Go, Biggie. Go, Biggie ♪
Strut, strut, strut, strut, strut.
Biggie has a nice little walk.
- All right. We are in.
Kailan is in. Let's bring her into the Zoom.
- I see you with the white tees.
- Hey, oh. - The white tees.
- Yeah! - Okay.
- You see this coordination?
- We don't even-we don't even plan this stuff.
It just happens. - I know. How are you?
- What's up? Yeah, hey, hey.
- I am good.
- All right, so what we want to do is walk you through
what we found.
You might even have some answers to questions
that we now have.
So let's dive in.
All right, so the first thing we did was Google image search
for all the pictures you sent us,
and none of them came back with any hits, which is good.
If you had pictures of somebody
who was a social media influencer or a model,
there's a good chance those pictures might come back
to their Instagram or a blog or something.
- Okay. - So that was good.
So then we did a Google search,
because you had given us Jordan's Snapchat,
[bleep]-shots.
- Yeah.
- So we just thought, like, okay, let's see
if that's a username that maybe he uses on other platforms.
And the first thing that came up was this hit
on a website called Stocktwits, which made sense,
'cause you had said he was into stocks, right?
So we were just thinking, okay,
[bleep]-shots is a username.
- Mm-hmm.
- So then, Kamie had a great idea,
which was to check Cashapp.
- Because you know, to have Cashapp,
you have to register it with your phone number.
- Right.
- So we did that, and then, when we put in the number,
an account comes up: [bleep]-shots.
The fact that the username [bleep]-shots--
and that is Jordan's username--
means that, like, that is definitely him.
- Mm-hmm. Right.
- But weirdly, the name on the account is Tahj.
Now, I'm gonna assume you've never heard that name before.
- No. I haven't.
- That's not, like, a nickname or a middle name or...
- No.
- Okay. Well, we thought it was interesting.
So that was our first, like, meaningful clue.
Now that we see that phone number's associated
with someone named Tahj,
we thought, "Let's run the phone number on,
like, a website to do background search,"
and the number came back to someone
named Tahj Hammel in Florida.
And you got the last name,
and now we've got the name Tahj popping back up,
which is crazy, because the Cashapp name is Tahj.
- Well, who the hell is Tahj? - Right.
So on that same website, it has here
some possible connected social media accounts,
and the first one is a Facebook,
and it's for someone whose name on here is Tahj Mahal.
But if you look up here, the URL, it's Tahj Hammel.
So it would appear that this girl's name is Tahj Hammel.
Now, we can't really see a lot on this page.
But you don't know this girl, do you?
- No.
- 'Cause it says she's from Miami, Florida,
which also, you know, fits.
- Ooh, if that's her... [laughs]
- Well, and you said it-- yesterday--
sounded like Jordan's voice was kind of girly.
So this is where we started to think, okay,
well maybe there is a chance that Jordan is a woman.
- Everything seems to be pointing back to Tahj,
and nothing seems to be pointing to Jordan.
- Right.
- ♪ When I was younger ♪
♪ You knew me better ♪
- It better not be no girl.
I just--that's not something I can handle.
I'm a open book. I was always open.
So for you to not take none of those chances
just to straight up tell me,
that's disrespectful and scary.
- I think it would be one thing if this is Tahj,
and maybe they were just trying to see
kind of what they want in a romantic partner
and started exploring.
But the accepting photos from you
and having sexual conversations with you
is where I think that things cross a major, major line.
- I'm getting a headache.
♪ ♪
- ♪ The devil spoke so I leaned a little closer ♪
- Oh, my goodness.
'Cause over the years, though--
like, 12 years, really?
Really?
- ♪ Because a faithful mind makes ♪
- It's crazy. - ♪ A very foolish heart ♪
♪ That loses its own way ♪
- Normally, we would reach out now, at this point, to Jordan.
You could also text Jordan.
Either way, we've got to make contact
and let Jordan know that this is an opportunity
right now for him to finally tell the truth.
- Would you guys be able to do it?
'Cause I might snap if I do it.
- Sure.
All right, here we go. It's calling.
[phone line trilling]
[dramatic music]
- Hey, is this--I'm looking for Jordan, or perhaps Tahj?
- My name is Nev.
I'm from the TV show "Catfish,"
and I'm actually filming an episode now
with a woman named Kailan,
who's been talking to a friend online
for a long time named Jordan,
and she gave us this number to get in touch with him.
[phone line cuts off, tone sounds]
- [bleep]. I knew it. I knew it.
- They hung up? - They hung up. That was crazy.
It definitely sounded like a girl, right?
- That was Tahj.
- Yo...
- So it doesn't totally answer our question, but--
- The hanging up answers the question.
- That's crazy! What the [bleep]?
- Yeah, that's not a good sign.
So I think now we have to follow up with a text message.
"Hey, it's Nev again.
"Didn't mean to catch you off guard.
"Was just trying to connect. We're hoping to help Kailan
"and Jordan finally meet up after all these years,
"and we understand there are some things about you
"Kailan might not know, but want to help give you
an opportunity to explain them."
- That's a subtle-- - Yeah.
That's gentle. - Mm-hmm.
- I'll just end it with, "Please take this all in,
and we can talk in an hour."
Okay, I'm gonna send this.
- Oh, wow.
I just have a headache.
Got butterflies.
It just is getting scary now.
12 years.
- Yeah. I mean--
- That's some crazy [bleep].
- Well, the text is delivered.
Feel like we should give him a few minutes
before we follow up.
So maybe we take a little break,
think about all that, figure out questions
you might want to ask, if and when we do get
Jordan/Tahj to respond to our text.
- And try not to text him and go off.
- Okay.
- All right. See you soon.
I mean, definitely poked the beehive.
- We unearthed some [bleep]. - Yeah.
- For sure. - Something's going on here.
- Yeah.
- And it is not as simple as Jordan's a little shy.
- No.
I just feel bad for Kailan. She's not happy.
And if Tahj comes on the screen,
we're gonna have some serious problems.
- Hey,
so I just got off the phone with Nev and Kamie.
They just broke the news to me
that Jordan might not be who he say he is.
That is a scary thought, because after 12 years,
you would think you know a person.
You would think there was no lie.
You would just think that everything is real.
I'm hurt. I'm definitely hurt.
- Okay.
We've given them an hour. Are you ready?
- Let's see if we got a response.
I doubt we did. Doesn't look like it. No.
So all right.
Let's get our girl back in Zoom.
[lively music]
Hey. - Hey.
- All right, have you-- you haven't heard
anything from Jordan, right?
- Nothing. Nothing.
- Haven't responded to our text yet, either,
and that's now been over an hour.
We need to follow up.
- Re-strategize. - Right. Follow up,
but maybe with a little bit of a different strategy now,
because the sort of straightforward, innocent,
"Hey, we want to help you guys meet up" thing
doesn't seem to be inspiring them.
- You could send a video on Snapchat.
- Right. We could also send a video.
- 'Cause maybe they think it's fake.
- That has happened,
where people thought I was lying,
and I'm not actually me.
Let's do a Snapchat video.
Hey, Jordan,
it's Nev and Kamie, and we're, like we said earlier,
filming an episode of "Catfish" right now.
And we are trying to connect you with Kailan.
We know you guys have been friends for a long time
and you both a lot to each other,
so we just thought this would be a great opportunity
to finally let you guys talk and see each other.
And she's here now also and wants to say a few things.
- Hey, Jordan.
We just trying to get in contact with you.
I think it's time for us to actually meet
and see what's been going on.
That's all I got to say.
- Great. Actually, it ended right there.
Okay, so I think that was pretty good...
- Yeah. I think so.
- And felt very genuine and honest.
- Yeah.
- All right, I'm gonna press send.
Is that cool? All right.
- Sent. Delivered.
- Oh, it says sent and delivered.
- Okay.
- Whatever it is they have to reveal or tell you,
it's pretty obvious
that this is the best chance they're gonna get to do that.
If, at this point, they still can't recognize that,
at the very least,
they owe it to you to be honest with you,
even if it means doing something that, you know,
will negatively affect them,
then you really have to question how much they care
about your feelings.
Oh, it says opened. - Ooh!
- So she's watching it right now--
he's watching it right now.
- New chat! - Oh. We got a chat.
- [laughs excitedly] - All right.
Okay. New chat. Ready?
- Nope.
- What?
Is that what he calls you? "Kay"?
- Yeah. - No problem, Kay. I'll do it.
So he's responding sort of to you in the video.
Which is good, right?
Just so casual. Okay, great.
"We are all in a Zoom right now."
- Oh, my God. It's getting hot.
- "I'll text you the link."
- Y'all don't understand.
Like... my heart is in my stomach,
and is, like, beating. Is that a butterfly?
- All right, so now I've sent the Zoom link on both Snapchat
and the text message.
- Is it gonna be Tahj?
- Well, it could also just be someone totally random.
- Right.
- At any moment, Jordan might just join the Zoom.
♪ ♪
[Zoom notification dings] Oh!
- Oh, [bleep].
- Hello. Who's there?
[intense music]
- At any moment, Jordan might just join the Zoom.
[tense music]
[Zoom notification dings] Oh!
- Oh, [bleep].
- Hello. Who's there?
[dramatic music]
Oh.
- Hi. - Who is this guy?
- Oh, [bleep]. - What the hell?
You gotta be kidding me.
Just casually sits down. This is--wait.
Just hold on a second. It can't be this simple.
- No, no, no, no, no.
- Oh, [bleep].
- Okay, Jordan? That's you, right?
- It's me. Completely me.
- So hello. - Nice to meet you guys.
- Nice to meet you. - Hello.
- So can you explain why...
why it took this long to meet up
and why we are even involved,
when it doesn't seem that we need to be?
- Honestly, I would say, over the last--what,
over the last decade,
a lot of growth...
a lot of growth between me and Kay,
and I would say that I never really had enough time.
You know, I've been busy focusing on myself
in regards to investments and stocks.
So it's really my goal to, like, make sure
that I have financial freedom,
and I never had time to balance a relationship
and then try to go after my goals as well.
It just didn't mix up as well together.
- Okay. Uh...
- So you're saying we didn't link
because of your job, right?
- That would be correct. Due to, you know,
trying to get to the next step in finances, for sure.
- Okay.
I'm trying to get to the next step in finances as well.
But I'm still sitting here trying to make time for you.
So...
- I would say, in regards to, like, pursuing things,
I feel like, you know, we've only gone so far,
mainly because we haven't seen each other.
- Well, but she's tried to, right?
- Um...
yes, Kailan has tried. But I've been very busy.
I would say, for those reasons,
you know, it's unmotivating, I should say.
- I don't know. You seem pretty motivated
in your text messages to Kailan about being with her.
- Giving her some [bleep].
- Having sex with her.
You can't meet up with her for an afternoon in Orlando
or get on a FaceTime call?
- So the best way to put it is literally, once again,
I've been very busy.
In regards to meeting up, it was completely
out of the question, 'cause I work six days a week,
so there's no way for me to just go ahead
and take a flight to wherever she is.
- I know, but you said--when she came to Orlando,
you said, "We'll meet up."
- Well, are you in Orlando is the question.
- So currently, I'm in Orlando right now. Yes.
I just feel like we never--
we never really planned it out.
- We did plan it. - Okay. So we did plan it.
But once again, though, like, me being busy,
I feel like it just wasn't able to work out.
- So you can't give me, like, five minutes of your time?
Even with, like, a quick FaceTime call?
I'm pretty sure if you work
six days a week, you have a day off.
- Sometimes I don't feel like I have enough time
for my own family.
So it's not just you. It's not.
- Wait, so--and you-- - Even though--sorry, Nev.
Even though I work 12 hours a day,
seven days a week on some Sundays,
with three kids,
you still don't have one second for me?
- I mean, when you put it like that,
it sounds--it sounds crazy.
But overall, for my work schedule,
it just doesn't work out.
- I'm curious about your work schedule.
How--what is your job?
- So I'm currently a salesman for solar.
- So that's, like, your day job.
- Yes.
And the other job would be me going ahead
to do my investments.
So it takes a lot of time.
I just really--I didn't have time to go ahead
and just take a vacation.
And I'm not trying to, like, lead you on or anything.
Every time we talk, it's always a spark.
So I feel like that's one thing that I hold on to,
and I don't want to let that go.
- Right.
But we do have some sort of simple questions
that we need to get answered,
because we were very confused by some things that we found.
So when we looked up your phone number,
we found it was connected to a girl named Tahj Hammel.
Do you know who that is?
- No.
- But I'm a little confused. Because that's not your name.
- It is. - It is your name.
- Yeah. It is.
- So-so, is Jordan also your name?
- No. No.
So Jordan is my nickname. People who are--like,
know me personally, you'll call me Tahj,
'cause you know me on that basis.
But other than that, though, if you know me
in the virtual world, you most likely call me Jordan.
- But wouldn't you consider
your connection/friendship with Kay
to be close enough to tell her your, you know, real name?
- There was no need to change anything,
'cause I feel like certain relationships,
they don't get beyond the internet.
So it's like, why tell you my personal information
if we're not even gonna carry along to that further extent?
- Like 12 years, for example?
Yeah.
- So you were going to let me fly out there,
with me knowing your virtual name?
- I'm pretty secretive upon certain things.
And I wouldn't say that this is a huge secret of me being Tahj,
but it's like a, if you know, you know,
and if you don't, you just don't.
- Okay, and I think when we called you earlier,
it sounded like a girl answered the phone.
- Yeah. That's just my friend.
- Okay.
Is that something you do often?
- What do you mean?
- Have a friend answer the phone?
I was just curious. In this case, it was a woman.
- Well, I mean, at the time she picked up the phone,
so there's not much to say.
It's not something that's regular.
- But if she's gonna answer your phone,
and then I come on and say, "Hey, is Jordan there,"
wouldn't the next thing you'd say be,
"Yeah, hold on," or "Who's calling?"
- We said Jordan or Tahj. - Right.
- Right. I even said that. Right.
- So she would probably know you by either name,
and still hung up the phone.
- So I mean, I'm not sure when you guys called,
but at the time, I just was not there.
That's the best way to explain it.
- I want you to be real with me.
- I feel like I've been real.
But in certain areas, I haven't been transparent with you.
- Yeah, that sounds like bull[bleep].
- You've had a relationship with Kailan for 12 years.
It's okay to tell her the truth about what's been going on.
- So let me talk. You done? - No.
We're not done until you tell us
who that girl on the phone really was.
- You've had a relationship with Kailan for 12 years.
It's okay to tell her the truth about what's been going on.
- So let me talk. You done?
- No. We're not done until you tell us
who that girl on the phone really was.
- I guess you could say the girl
who answered the phone is, like, my girlfriend.
- Finally. The truth comes out.
You understand how, like, [bleep] all of this sounds.
Like, it sounds really bad.
- It wouldn't sound bad if you just told me straight up.
- When were you gonna tell her that you had a girlfriend?
- Oh. Hmm.
Well, honestly, we just made things official
maybe, like, a month ago.
So I mean, I probably wasn't gonna say anything
for some time, honestly. Like--
- So you've got time is what you're saying.
- Nah, I don't have time.
- You so smart, then you sound so...
- [laughing quietly] - Dumb.
- The vibe you're giving off right now is, like,
"Hey, you know, I've been busy.
"Sorry. I'm just--I work so hard.
You know, I gotta get that money."
But, like-- - Yeah.
- But even if that's true,
it still makes you sound like an asshole,
because you're the one who made it seem
as though you're very interested in her
and wanted more of a relationship.
But I guess you didn't really ever think you were gonna
meet up with her anyway, so it was just sort of fun.
- So I'm so happy that you said that last point,
'cause that goes for most people
that I meet in the virtual world.
- So with that being said, how many other people
are you talking to the way that you're talking to Kailan?
- Uh... [exhales]
that's tough to say.
- He gotta think. - Honestly, like...
maybe three.
- You have four relationships going on right now.
- Sorry, but the number sounds so misconstrued.
I would say-- - I think it's basic math.
- Sounds basic to me. - Three plus one equals four.
- Mm. Mm.
- Kailan, I don't know what to tell you, sweetie.
This ain't gonna work out.
I'ma tell you that right now. It's not gonna happen.
- I would--I would rather him be somebody else.
- Maybe you guys caught, like, an asshole vibe from me,
but I'm sure you guys have ran into the situations
as to where you put something on pause,
and then you maybe came back to it in the future.
We've all done it. So.
- Which would all be well and good
if you just relayed that information to Kailan
instead of talking about marriage and children
and wanting to put a baby inside of her.
- I feel like, right now,
things don't align up for us to be together.
'Cause you have three kids, and I don't see myself, like,
actually tying down and being the stepfather role regardless,
to be truthful with you. I don't know.
But I think that's a really great way for me to explain it.
- I have a headache.
I just feel like you sound like every guy that's out here.
And I looked at you different.
Every other guy wants to [bleep],
don't want to be there for me and my children.
Don't bring my kids in it.
If you already knew
that you didn't have no future with me,
don't make my kids the excuse.
You should have just been real
as far as not putting things in my head
as to think there is a future.
You got a girl? I want you to focus on that.
- If you want for girls not to think that you're an asshole,
don't be giving off that [bleep]-boy energy.
Don't make promises that you know you can't keep,
and don't say anything that you don't actually mean.
- Don't start telling girls that you want to put
a baby up inside them when you don't want to do that.
- If you are inside of a woman and you have the feeling,
"I want to put a baby in her," pull the [bleep] out.
Pull out immediately. - Right.
- Pull out immediately. Get out.
- Kailan, anything you want to say to Jordan right now
before we say goodbye to him?
- You have a lot of growing to do.
You've grown, but you have a lot of growing to do.
- Okay.
Hey, thank you guys. Have a great day.
- [smooches] - Okay.
- [flatly] You too. [smooches]
- Did he do that? Did he make a kiss sound?
- [gibbering mockingly]
Every time he spoke, that's all I heard.
- No.
- Blah, blah--why couldn't he have been the woman?
- Jesus. I'ma let him realize that I was the best bet.
- Yeah, and he will, at some point, probably realize that.
- And guess what, even if he doesn't,
you go about your life with your family,
and keep creating the future that you want.
- Anyway, look, it's gonna work out for you for sure.
- Mm-hmm.
- This is only going to move you closer
to where you need to be
and the person you need to be with.
- Yep. The book is closed.
And I really appreciate you guys
for letting me close this chapter.
- We got you. - All right, Kailan.
Take care, all right? We'll talk soon.
- You too. - Okay?
- Okay. I'll talk to you guys later.
See you. Bye. - Bye!
- ♪ Kick my feet up and take it slow ♪
[mellow electronic music]
♪ So many places I can go ♪
♪ ♪
♪ I don't need much to make a home ♪
- We've got an Instagram model, Diamond.
She comes across Steve, also big on social media.
She starts doing whatever she can to get his attention.
- Some titty pics.
- So I'm like, wow, this is my soulmate.
- Oh! They know each other.
Are we getting [bleep]ed with?
- I wasn't seeing that coming. - This is about to be dramatic.
- Shut the [bleep] up.