Big Time Rush (2009–2013): Season 3, Episode 9 - Big Time Gold - full transcript
When the boys achieve their first gold record, James and Carlos want to play it to hear what gold sounds like. Logan helps Kendall buy a gold necklace for Jo, which Camille mistakes as a fifteenth-month anniversary present for herself. In putting up a business sign at the Palm Woods, Katie strikes black gold (oil), which prompts her to start an oil company with Buddha Bob, which prompts Reginald Bitters to insist on a piece of the action.
No!
- Aw!
- Really?
- Look, we just need you - to drive
us to this really cool - Camping spot,
'cause my mom won't.
- Hmm. Hmm.
No.
- Gustavo, we haven't
- been camping once
- Since we moved
- from Minnesota.
- The call of the wild
- is calling.
- We manly men must answer
- that call.
- We need to sleep
under the stars
and see the sunrise
to the sweet, sweet sounds
of the loon.
- Uh, there are no loons
in L.A.
- Just bears.
- And I don't want to cancel
- the next concert
- Because you've been eaten
- by 'em.
- Oh, no, no, no, no, there are
- not gonna be any bears there.
- All we need is a ride
- to this campsite called
Bear gulch.
- May I remind you,
your contract clearly prohibits
any dangerous activities like...
- Skydiving, candle making,
- and outdoor camping.
- Aw!
- Come on!
- Gustavo, don't you remember
what it was like
- to want to test your limits
- under the stars?
- I do.
- Okay, if you really want
- to camp,
I know of a cool spot
that I will allow.
This is not what we had in mind!
- ♪ Make it count,
- play it straight ♪
- ♪ don't look back,
- don't hesitate ♪
- ♪ what you want,
what you feel ♪
- ♪ never quit
- and make it real ♪
♪ If you want it all,
lay it on the line ♪
♪ it's the only life you got
so you got to live it big time ♪
- Seriously? Camping in rocque
records with Ben the night
watchman?
- Hey, what are you guys
- doing here?
- I thought
- you were going camping.
- Well, according to Gustavo,
- we're not allowed to be one
- with the trees
And the soil and the stars...
- And camp outdoors.
- Hmm.
- I know where you can go camp
- with the trees and stars
- Without breaking
- Gustavo's rules.
All: We're listening.
- But I'd have to go with you.
It's a secret camping spot.
- Yeah, I'm sorry, Jo.
This camping trip is
men only.
- Can't risk you getting hurt.
- Oh, you think boys are
better campers than girls?
All: Yeah.
- Hey! I've camped a lot with my
dad and brothers, and I'm good.
- Me too.
- Oh, okay.
- Well, you know, let's just
- invite the jennifers
- And make it
- a girls versus guys camp-off!
- It'd be lovely.
- I was kidding!
- Okay, so where's this
- secret camping spot
- That won't get us in trouble
- with Gustavo?
Not bad.
All: It's not real.
- Where do you think
- you're going?
- Camping.
- With who?
- You.
- No.
I hate camping.
- I like beds.
- Beds are nice.
Woods are not nice.
- But we're camping out front
- of the big buy.
- The islab 3
- goes on sale tomorrow,
- And I need to camp out
- to make sure I get one.
- Mmm... no.
- But, mom, I've been good.
I got straight "as,"
and I'll be sad.
- Forget it.
- Sad look won't work.
The mad look won't work, either.
And don't give me the,
"I'm growing up so fast,
- "and you're gonna regret not
- having spent more time with me
When you had the chance" speech.
Ding!
Such a good speech.
- Well, you always say,
do good things,
and good things will happen.
- Like I always say,
- quit your yammering,
- 'cause I don't want to hear you
- all night long.
- Last week on new town high,
- we did a camping episode
- Where we got attacked
- by zombies,
And a vampire bear saved us.
Both: You scared?
- Do we look scared?
- Hi.
- This is nothing like camping.
- It's camping Hollywood style.
- Stay there.
Okay, how's that?
- Well, we wanted to sleep
under the stars.
- Hey.
- We also want to see
- the sunrise
And wake to the sweet sounds
of the loons.
- Yeah, I can't do that.
- Gah!
- Okay, it's impressive,
but it's missing
that element of danger.
- Danger.
- Who is that?
Anyone there?
Beulah.
- I am not allowed to bring anyone
- on set without clearance,
So stay away
from the weekend watch person.
- Boys on that side
of the log...
All: Girls on this side.
Love our side.
Love it.
- And don't even think
about asking us for help.
All: Don't ask us for help.
- Carlos,
- you're on the wrong side.
- Yeah.
- Well, the GPS we put in
- the guys' camping gear worked.
- They went to bear gulch?
- Actually, they went
to colossal studios,
stage 27.
- I called the studio,
- and they informed me
- That it's half-full
- with a camping set.
- I said no camping!
- Actually, you said
no camping outdoors.
- My dogs unsupervised
on a sound stage?
They could get hurt!
- Oh, my gosh.
You're worried about them.
- Oh, yeah,
I'm worried about them.
- Yeah, me?
- Oh, yeah.
- Yeah, you know what
- I'm worried about is
- That they're gonna
- lose their arms,
And then how will they hold
their microphones?
Okay, call colossal studios
and tell them we want a tour
of the lot for a video shoot.
But what we're actually gonna do
is break into that sound stage
and cut those guys'
camping trip short.
Booya!
- Earth, stars,
and a sleeping bag.
It's all you need.
- Yeah, but the girls
are kind of nice.
- Hey, they are just gonna
- slow us down.
- We're gonna end up
- spending all night
- Trying to help them set up
- camp... and what's that smell?
- You guys want
some apple sausage?
All: Yup!
- No!
Because when we camp,
we like to forage off the land.
Now, what we got?
- I found...
Four dirty mints
and a mustard packet.
Duct tape.
- Wait.
Look what I found.
- It's a prop Turkey.
- Yeah.
- That's what the mustard's for.
- Guys, come on.
You have no food.
- Well, that's the way
we like to camp...
Hungry,
ready for anything.
- Who's that?
- A storm's a'coming.
- It's the air conditioning.
- It kicks on to keep all
- the equipment cool overnight.
- Okay, so what,
it stays on all night?
- But you guys brought
extra layers, right?
- Layers?
- We only need one layer
to stay warm.
- Thank you.
- Why are they looking at us
- like that?
- They look like giant worms.
- Uh-huh.
- Why you are waiting in line
- if you already have an islab?
- Ugh,
because the islab 2 is old,
and the islab 3 is new.
- He's right, mom.
- Oh, oh, I'm getting
a big buy islab update!
They only have enough islab 3s
for the first 20 campers.
- Perfect!
And I'm number 20.
- See? If you do good things,
- good things happen.
- Thanks for saving
my spot, bitters.
- And here are the snacks
- I promised.
- Hey!
- You cannot save a spot in line.
Big buy's overnight line policy
is first come, first serve.
And I was here first.
- Yes, but the policy
- of life is,
- If you're great-looking
- with snacks,
You can do anything you want.
- Tell me about it.
And now you're 21st in line.
- Whoop.
- Okay, now they're
just mocking us.
- This is Gustavo's fault.
He should've just let us camp
in real woods like we wanted.
- Oh, if he was here,
- I would totally give him
- a piece of my mind.
- Yeah!
- My fault?
- They're the ones
- that are freezing
And are gonna catch a cold.
- You realize you sound like
- an actual caring person
- right now.
- Oh, yeah.
- The only thing I want to do
- is cut this camping trip short.
But how?
- Why don't guys just admit
- that you're wrong
And come and get warm?
- And come fake-roast
- marshmallows with us?
- Can we please go get
some marshmallows?
Please?
- Nope.
'Cause thanks to
some manly foraging,
we can start a real fire.
- No, no, you can't light
- a fire on the...
- I hate camping
- Hollywood style!
- Wet!
- Cold!
- Hungry!
- Guys, just get out
of the wet sleeping bags,
come over here...
All: Get some food...
- And some heat.
- We are men of the wild,
- and if the wild is
- a Hollywood sound stage,
Then we will conquer it
without girl help.
- What does that mean?
- It means
- there's got to be
- A kitchen or a pantry
- around somewhere.
- Right.
- Carlos and I will search
- the wilderness for provisions.
- And Logan and I will find
- warm, dry clothes and blankets.
- All right, let's roll.
I mean hop.
- Excellent.
The dogs have left the wild
on their own.
- But now they're out wandering
- on a studio lot.
You're right!
Something could happen to them!
They could get hurt!
- What has gotten into you?
- Come on, sweetheart.
You're 21st in line,
and they only have 20 islabs.
- You're gonna let them get away
with cutting me out of line?
- They will not get away
with this, because bad things
happen when you do bad things.
- So let's go sleep
- in our beds tonight,
And they will get
painful skin rashes.
- Oh, I won't get a rash,
'cause I use lanolin oil
after I bathe.
- We can't leave now.
A storm could roll in,
or it could get really cold,
- and people would leave the line,
- then I would move up.
- Oh, according to my islab,
the forecast for tonight
is sunny and warm with no chance
of you getting an islab 3.
- Okay, let's go.
- No.
I have done good things.
I volunteer.
- I returned that wallet I found
- and left the money in it.
- Where's this big
- do good things payoff
You keep telling me about, mom?
- I guess we'll find out,
'cause we're stayin'.
- Okay, okay.
Preproduction, finance...
Jackpot!
It's locked.
- Okay, remember,
this is the wilderness,
and there are no doors
in the wild.
- We're really good campers.
Oh-oh-oh!
- Not warm enough.
That's a nice dress.
Hey, did you find anything yet?
- I don't speak bear.
- And I'm warm and toasty.
- Try down the hall.
- We need sweatshirts.
- Fine!
- There you are.
Walk him in.
- Don't want this flying off in
- the middle of the stunt scene.
- Whoa, whoa,
- what do you mean, stunt?
- What was that?
- What was that?
- Great energy,
- but save it.
- Everyone's waiting.
- Come on.
All right, here we go.
- I got the bear.
- Walking.
- Dude, I found the sweatshirts
and rain gear!
Logan?
Logan!
- They cut in line
- and they're watching cartoons?
- Bad things aren't happening
- to them, mom.
- Wait a minute.
Sponges don't talk.
- Well, it doesn't always
- happen instantly.
It could come in the form
of an IRS audit
or a raccoon attack
when they're 60.
- Well, I can't wait that long.
- And a stink bomb in their tent
- will get them out of line
And get me an islab 3.
- No stink bombs!
Stink bombs are bad.
You're good, Katie.
Good.
- I hate being good.
- They've been gone
over an hour.
- And they are
really bad campers.
All: Terrible.
- Okay, we'll go look
for Logan and Kendall.
- You guys look
- for Carlos and James.
Move out.
- Or we can use
this opportunity to...
- Put our head shots in every
- producer's inbox on the lot.
- Split up!
- Picture I.D.
- Anyone on the lot without I.D.
- Will be charged with trespassing
And prosecuted.
- What are you gonna do to me?
- I might hold you captive
till morning.
I might call the police.
I'm still debating.
One thing's for sure:
No one's gonna save you
on this camping trip.
- We have to save her.
- I know we do.
- Hey.
- What happened to camping?
- Well, first, I have to find
- out what happened to Logan.
- Wait.
- You can't find Logan?
- Well, he was in a bear suit.
Then I heard voices.
Then he was gone.
- But it's Saturday.
- The studio is empty
- on Saturday
Except for the occasional
commercial like...
Big bear lip balm.
- "Fights off chapped lips
- like they were ninjas.
"Ninjas attack bear stunt man
on city street."
- Wait.
- Did you say Logan was
- in a bear suit?
- Okay!
I got my bear!
- I like his energy.
Now, do I have my ninjas
that attack the bear?
- I'm not the bear, guys!
- This is a big
- misunderstanding, so...
- Perfect!
- Four hours.
- We've been in line
- for four hours,
- And nothing good
- has happened.
- Line buddy,
- give me some quarters.
I need to go feed
my parking meter.
- Quarters?
- I don't carry quarters.
Has you seen the old guy on 'em?
He's hideous!
- Don't give them any money.
I will.
Here, because I do good things,
and good things happen.
- Whatever.
- 17, 18, 19...
- What are these?
- Wristbands. Last year, someone
used a stink bomb to move up in
line,
so now we give the first
20 campers wristbands
- which you can redeem in
- the morning for your islab 3.
- Well, I need one
for my line buddy.
- Well, you can't save
- someone's space in line.
So you're number 20.
- I'm getting an islab 3!
- I told you when you do good
- things, good things happen!
- Where's everybody going?
- Oh, they handed out
islab 3 wristbands.
- They said no saving spots.
I tried to fight him,
but he was very persuasive.
- Well, then, give me that one,
- because I was here first.
- Yes, but I was
- in front of you,
And way better-looking and...
- get back here, you...!
- So what do you think?
- I think my daughter
is very good.
- It's not gonna work.
- It's got to.
Besides, you know that you're
the only one who can do it.
- Good luck, my friend.
- You too.
- I'm beulah!
Whoa!
- Carlos!
- You came to rescue me.
- Yeah, I know.
Uh...
I can't seem to break you out.
- Carlos.
- What?
- The keys are on the wall.
Ding!
Oh.
- My hero.
- We should get out of here.
Come on.
- Hi.
- Welcome to colossal studios.
- Get in!
- Come on!
- Go, go, go, go, go!
- Okay!
Bear, you are lip balm,
and these red ninjas
are chapped lips.
- Okay, get this bear head
- off of me!
- Right, you're lip balm.
- Okay, these ninjas are
gonna hit you really hard!
Repeatedly!
And...
Action!
- ♪ Love me, love me,
- say you love me ♪
- Get away from Logan!
- Who is that?
Who are those people in there?
Wait!
- Leave him alone!
- Hands off my dogs!
- There's more of them!
- Attack the bear!
Attack the bear!
We got a car!
Who brought the car?
Abandon set!
Abandon set!
- Wait!
- Take our head shots, please?
- Oh, thank you.
Oh, my god.
- Still think camping's
- not dangerous?
- And ha!
- There are bears!
- Gustavo, what are you
doing here?
- And if had just let us camp
- outside and have fun
- Like we asked
- in the first place,
None of this
would've happened.
- Look, I remember
what it's like to have fun.
But now I know what it's like
to, I guess, be a parent.
And, you know, I was worried
about you guys.
I get worried.
- Okay.
But you still got to let us
do stuff.
- Okay, well, what if I can find
- a place for you to camp
That's outdoors
with a sunrise and loons?
All: Where?
Okay, it's 5:30.
- Cue the loon.
- And cue the sunrise.
Nice sunrise.
Oh, yeah.
- All in all, I'd say this was
a pretty awesome camping trip.
- Yup, with awesome
girl campers.
- And amazing man campers.
- Really amazing.
- We should
- do this again sometime.
All: No!
- ♪ Step it up,
get in gear ♪
- ♪ go for broke,
- make it clear ♪
- ♪ make it work,
get it right ♪
♪ Go and make your luck
with the life you choose ♪
♪ if you want it all,
lay it on the line ♪
♪ it's the only life you got
so you got to live it big time ♪
- Aw!
- Really?
- Look, we just need you - to drive
us to this really cool - Camping spot,
'cause my mom won't.
- Hmm. Hmm.
No.
- Gustavo, we haven't
- been camping once
- Since we moved
- from Minnesota.
- The call of the wild
- is calling.
- We manly men must answer
- that call.
- We need to sleep
under the stars
and see the sunrise
to the sweet, sweet sounds
of the loon.
- Uh, there are no loons
in L.A.
- Just bears.
- And I don't want to cancel
- the next concert
- Because you've been eaten
- by 'em.
- Oh, no, no, no, no, there are
- not gonna be any bears there.
- All we need is a ride
- to this campsite called
Bear gulch.
- May I remind you,
your contract clearly prohibits
any dangerous activities like...
- Skydiving, candle making,
- and outdoor camping.
- Aw!
- Come on!
- Gustavo, don't you remember
what it was like
- to want to test your limits
- under the stars?
- I do.
- Okay, if you really want
- to camp,
I know of a cool spot
that I will allow.
This is not what we had in mind!
- ♪ Make it count,
- play it straight ♪
- ♪ don't look back,
- don't hesitate ♪
- ♪ what you want,
what you feel ♪
- ♪ never quit
- and make it real ♪
♪ If you want it all,
lay it on the line ♪
♪ it's the only life you got
so you got to live it big time ♪
- Seriously? Camping in rocque
records with Ben the night
watchman?
- Hey, what are you guys
- doing here?
- I thought
- you were going camping.
- Well, according to Gustavo,
- we're not allowed to be one
- with the trees
And the soil and the stars...
- And camp outdoors.
- Hmm.
- I know where you can go camp
- with the trees and stars
- Without breaking
- Gustavo's rules.
All: We're listening.
- But I'd have to go with you.
It's a secret camping spot.
- Yeah, I'm sorry, Jo.
This camping trip is
men only.
- Can't risk you getting hurt.
- Oh, you think boys are
better campers than girls?
All: Yeah.
- Hey! I've camped a lot with my
dad and brothers, and I'm good.
- Me too.
- Oh, okay.
- Well, you know, let's just
- invite the jennifers
- And make it
- a girls versus guys camp-off!
- It'd be lovely.
- I was kidding!
- Okay, so where's this
- secret camping spot
- That won't get us in trouble
- with Gustavo?
Not bad.
All: It's not real.
- Where do you think
- you're going?
- Camping.
- With who?
- You.
- No.
I hate camping.
- I like beds.
- Beds are nice.
Woods are not nice.
- But we're camping out front
- of the big buy.
- The islab 3
- goes on sale tomorrow,
- And I need to camp out
- to make sure I get one.
- Mmm... no.
- But, mom, I've been good.
I got straight "as,"
and I'll be sad.
- Forget it.
- Sad look won't work.
The mad look won't work, either.
And don't give me the,
"I'm growing up so fast,
- "and you're gonna regret not
- having spent more time with me
When you had the chance" speech.
Ding!
Such a good speech.
- Well, you always say,
do good things,
and good things will happen.
- Like I always say,
- quit your yammering,
- 'cause I don't want to hear you
- all night long.
- Last week on new town high,
- we did a camping episode
- Where we got attacked
- by zombies,
And a vampire bear saved us.
Both: You scared?
- Do we look scared?
- Hi.
- This is nothing like camping.
- It's camping Hollywood style.
- Stay there.
Okay, how's that?
- Well, we wanted to sleep
under the stars.
- Hey.
- We also want to see
- the sunrise
And wake to the sweet sounds
of the loons.
- Yeah, I can't do that.
- Gah!
- Okay, it's impressive,
but it's missing
that element of danger.
- Danger.
- Who is that?
Anyone there?
Beulah.
- I am not allowed to bring anyone
- on set without clearance,
So stay away
from the weekend watch person.
- Boys on that side
of the log...
All: Girls on this side.
Love our side.
Love it.
- And don't even think
about asking us for help.
All: Don't ask us for help.
- Carlos,
- you're on the wrong side.
- Yeah.
- Well, the GPS we put in
- the guys' camping gear worked.
- They went to bear gulch?
- Actually, they went
to colossal studios,
stage 27.
- I called the studio,
- and they informed me
- That it's half-full
- with a camping set.
- I said no camping!
- Actually, you said
no camping outdoors.
- My dogs unsupervised
on a sound stage?
They could get hurt!
- Oh, my gosh.
You're worried about them.
- Oh, yeah,
I'm worried about them.
- Yeah, me?
- Oh, yeah.
- Yeah, you know what
- I'm worried about is
- That they're gonna
- lose their arms,
And then how will they hold
their microphones?
Okay, call colossal studios
and tell them we want a tour
of the lot for a video shoot.
But what we're actually gonna do
is break into that sound stage
and cut those guys'
camping trip short.
Booya!
- Earth, stars,
and a sleeping bag.
It's all you need.
- Yeah, but the girls
are kind of nice.
- Hey, they are just gonna
- slow us down.
- We're gonna end up
- spending all night
- Trying to help them set up
- camp... and what's that smell?
- You guys want
some apple sausage?
All: Yup!
- No!
Because when we camp,
we like to forage off the land.
Now, what we got?
- I found...
Four dirty mints
and a mustard packet.
Duct tape.
- Wait.
Look what I found.
- It's a prop Turkey.
- Yeah.
- That's what the mustard's for.
- Guys, come on.
You have no food.
- Well, that's the way
we like to camp...
Hungry,
ready for anything.
- Who's that?
- A storm's a'coming.
- It's the air conditioning.
- It kicks on to keep all
- the equipment cool overnight.
- Okay, so what,
it stays on all night?
- But you guys brought
extra layers, right?
- Layers?
- We only need one layer
to stay warm.
- Thank you.
- Why are they looking at us
- like that?
- They look like giant worms.
- Uh-huh.
- Why you are waiting in line
- if you already have an islab?
- Ugh,
because the islab 2 is old,
and the islab 3 is new.
- He's right, mom.
- Oh, oh, I'm getting
a big buy islab update!
They only have enough islab 3s
for the first 20 campers.
- Perfect!
And I'm number 20.
- See? If you do good things,
- good things happen.
- Thanks for saving
my spot, bitters.
- And here are the snacks
- I promised.
- Hey!
- You cannot save a spot in line.
Big buy's overnight line policy
is first come, first serve.
And I was here first.
- Yes, but the policy
- of life is,
- If you're great-looking
- with snacks,
You can do anything you want.
- Tell me about it.
And now you're 21st in line.
- Whoop.
- Okay, now they're
just mocking us.
- This is Gustavo's fault.
He should've just let us camp
in real woods like we wanted.
- Oh, if he was here,
- I would totally give him
- a piece of my mind.
- Yeah!
- My fault?
- They're the ones
- that are freezing
And are gonna catch a cold.
- You realize you sound like
- an actual caring person
- right now.
- Oh, yeah.
- The only thing I want to do
- is cut this camping trip short.
But how?
- Why don't guys just admit
- that you're wrong
And come and get warm?
- And come fake-roast
- marshmallows with us?
- Can we please go get
some marshmallows?
Please?
- Nope.
'Cause thanks to
some manly foraging,
we can start a real fire.
- No, no, you can't light
- a fire on the...
- I hate camping
- Hollywood style!
- Wet!
- Cold!
- Hungry!
- Guys, just get out
of the wet sleeping bags,
come over here...
All: Get some food...
- And some heat.
- We are men of the wild,
- and if the wild is
- a Hollywood sound stage,
Then we will conquer it
without girl help.
- What does that mean?
- It means
- there's got to be
- A kitchen or a pantry
- around somewhere.
- Right.
- Carlos and I will search
- the wilderness for provisions.
- And Logan and I will find
- warm, dry clothes and blankets.
- All right, let's roll.
I mean hop.
- Excellent.
The dogs have left the wild
on their own.
- But now they're out wandering
- on a studio lot.
You're right!
Something could happen to them!
They could get hurt!
- What has gotten into you?
- Come on, sweetheart.
You're 21st in line,
and they only have 20 islabs.
- You're gonna let them get away
with cutting me out of line?
- They will not get away
with this, because bad things
happen when you do bad things.
- So let's go sleep
- in our beds tonight,
And they will get
painful skin rashes.
- Oh, I won't get a rash,
'cause I use lanolin oil
after I bathe.
- We can't leave now.
A storm could roll in,
or it could get really cold,
- and people would leave the line,
- then I would move up.
- Oh, according to my islab,
the forecast for tonight
is sunny and warm with no chance
of you getting an islab 3.
- Okay, let's go.
- No.
I have done good things.
I volunteer.
- I returned that wallet I found
- and left the money in it.
- Where's this big
- do good things payoff
You keep telling me about, mom?
- I guess we'll find out,
'cause we're stayin'.
- Okay, okay.
Preproduction, finance...
Jackpot!
It's locked.
- Okay, remember,
this is the wilderness,
and there are no doors
in the wild.
- We're really good campers.
Oh-oh-oh!
- Not warm enough.
That's a nice dress.
Hey, did you find anything yet?
- I don't speak bear.
- And I'm warm and toasty.
- Try down the hall.
- We need sweatshirts.
- Fine!
- There you are.
Walk him in.
- Don't want this flying off in
- the middle of the stunt scene.
- Whoa, whoa,
- what do you mean, stunt?
- What was that?
- What was that?
- Great energy,
- but save it.
- Everyone's waiting.
- Come on.
All right, here we go.
- I got the bear.
- Walking.
- Dude, I found the sweatshirts
and rain gear!
Logan?
Logan!
- They cut in line
- and they're watching cartoons?
- Bad things aren't happening
- to them, mom.
- Wait a minute.
Sponges don't talk.
- Well, it doesn't always
- happen instantly.
It could come in the form
of an IRS audit
or a raccoon attack
when they're 60.
- Well, I can't wait that long.
- And a stink bomb in their tent
- will get them out of line
And get me an islab 3.
- No stink bombs!
Stink bombs are bad.
You're good, Katie.
Good.
- I hate being good.
- They've been gone
over an hour.
- And they are
really bad campers.
All: Terrible.
- Okay, we'll go look
for Logan and Kendall.
- You guys look
- for Carlos and James.
Move out.
- Or we can use
this opportunity to...
- Put our head shots in every
- producer's inbox on the lot.
- Split up!
- Picture I.D.
- Anyone on the lot without I.D.
- Will be charged with trespassing
And prosecuted.
- What are you gonna do to me?
- I might hold you captive
till morning.
I might call the police.
I'm still debating.
One thing's for sure:
No one's gonna save you
on this camping trip.
- We have to save her.
- I know we do.
- Hey.
- What happened to camping?
- Well, first, I have to find
- out what happened to Logan.
- Wait.
- You can't find Logan?
- Well, he was in a bear suit.
Then I heard voices.
Then he was gone.
- But it's Saturday.
- The studio is empty
- on Saturday
Except for the occasional
commercial like...
Big bear lip balm.
- "Fights off chapped lips
- like they were ninjas.
"Ninjas attack bear stunt man
on city street."
- Wait.
- Did you say Logan was
- in a bear suit?
- Okay!
I got my bear!
- I like his energy.
Now, do I have my ninjas
that attack the bear?
- I'm not the bear, guys!
- This is a big
- misunderstanding, so...
- Perfect!
- Four hours.
- We've been in line
- for four hours,
- And nothing good
- has happened.
- Line buddy,
- give me some quarters.
I need to go feed
my parking meter.
- Quarters?
- I don't carry quarters.
Has you seen the old guy on 'em?
He's hideous!
- Don't give them any money.
I will.
Here, because I do good things,
and good things happen.
- Whatever.
- 17, 18, 19...
- What are these?
- Wristbands. Last year, someone
used a stink bomb to move up in
line,
so now we give the first
20 campers wristbands
- which you can redeem in
- the morning for your islab 3.
- Well, I need one
for my line buddy.
- Well, you can't save
- someone's space in line.
So you're number 20.
- I'm getting an islab 3!
- I told you when you do good
- things, good things happen!
- Where's everybody going?
- Oh, they handed out
islab 3 wristbands.
- They said no saving spots.
I tried to fight him,
but he was very persuasive.
- Well, then, give me that one,
- because I was here first.
- Yes, but I was
- in front of you,
And way better-looking and...
- get back here, you...!
- So what do you think?
- I think my daughter
is very good.
- It's not gonna work.
- It's got to.
Besides, you know that you're
the only one who can do it.
- Good luck, my friend.
- You too.
- I'm beulah!
Whoa!
- Carlos!
- You came to rescue me.
- Yeah, I know.
Uh...
I can't seem to break you out.
- Carlos.
- What?
- The keys are on the wall.
Ding!
Oh.
- My hero.
- We should get out of here.
Come on.
- Hi.
- Welcome to colossal studios.
- Get in!
- Come on!
- Go, go, go, go, go!
- Okay!
Bear, you are lip balm,
and these red ninjas
are chapped lips.
- Okay, get this bear head
- off of me!
- Right, you're lip balm.
- Okay, these ninjas are
gonna hit you really hard!
Repeatedly!
And...
Action!
- ♪ Love me, love me,
- say you love me ♪
- Get away from Logan!
- Who is that?
Who are those people in there?
Wait!
- Leave him alone!
- Hands off my dogs!
- There's more of them!
- Attack the bear!
Attack the bear!
We got a car!
Who brought the car?
Abandon set!
Abandon set!
- Wait!
- Take our head shots, please?
- Oh, thank you.
Oh, my god.
- Still think camping's
- not dangerous?
- And ha!
- There are bears!
- Gustavo, what are you
doing here?
- And if had just let us camp
- outside and have fun
- Like we asked
- in the first place,
None of this
would've happened.
- Look, I remember
what it's like to have fun.
But now I know what it's like
to, I guess, be a parent.
And, you know, I was worried
about you guys.
I get worried.
- Okay.
But you still got to let us
do stuff.
- Okay, well, what if I can find
- a place for you to camp
That's outdoors
with a sunrise and loons?
All: Where?
Okay, it's 5:30.
- Cue the loon.
- And cue the sunrise.
Nice sunrise.
Oh, yeah.
- All in all, I'd say this was
a pretty awesome camping trip.
- Yup, with awesome
girl campers.
- And amazing man campers.
- Really amazing.
- We should
- do this again sometime.
All: No!
- ♪ Step it up,
get in gear ♪
- ♪ go for broke,
- make it clear ♪
- ♪ make it work,
get it right ♪
♪ Go and make your luck
with the life you choose ♪
♪ if you want it all,
lay it on the line ♪
♪ it's the only life you got
so you got to live it big time ♪