Big City Greens (2018–…): Season 2, Episode 19 - Present Tense/Hurt Bike - full transcript

♪ One, two
One, two, three, four ♪

♪ La, la, la, la ♪

♪ La, la, la ♪

♪ Na, na, na, na
Na, na, na, na ♪

♪ La, la, la, la ♪

Whoa, slow down, son.

Can't slow down, Dad. Not today.

Not on Remy's birthday!

They're here!

- Happy birthday, Remy.
- Happy whatever.

Are you guys ready
to play some games?



Oh, yeah, "games."
Like potato peeler over here?

Drop and peel me 50.

Did enough of that in the war.

Get me when it's time to leave.

Want to find a game
to play together, Papa?

Sure thing, sweetie.

What game should we play first?

Ah, ah, ah, your grandmother
is still expecting

a call from you, birthday boy.

But that'll cut
into my Cricket time.

Don't worry, buddy. I need to go
drop off your present anyway.

Master Cricket, have you brought
a gift for Master Remy?

Of course. One best present
for one best friend.

Bouncy ball.



Hmm. Very good.

I'll put it with the others.

Whoa!

Those are Remy's other gifts?

Yes, Master Remy always receives
the most lavish of gifts.

Vasquez, I found Remy
the biggest and bounciest ball

in all of Big City.

Wowee-zowee!

Would you look
at all the presents.

Which one's yours, Cricket?

It's, uh, the good one?

Oh, Cricket, you old bean.

Hey, Remy.

You finally going to win
that big prize this year?

I wish.

Uh, what big prize?

You mean you never heard
of the coolest,

most bestest prize
at Snuggly Pete's?

Were you born
in a dumb-dumb hole?

They're talking about the top
prize at the prize booth.

Big Rex.

A 10,000-ticket prize.

But no kid has ever won
10,000 tickets.

I'm just here to have
a good time.

Even if he's got
the cutest little sunglasses

that he couldn't have possibly
put on himself.

I mean, look at those arms.

Don't you worry, little Remy.

I will win those 10,000 tickets

to get you the birthday present
you deserve.

Why'd I let myself get dragged
into this madhouse?

- Please, can somebody help me?
- Huh?

My youngest, Bryan,

he hasn't come out
of the playtubes yet.

He must've gotten lost.

Lost, lost...

Sammy never made it back, Alice.

He's done for.

I ain't leaving him in there.

We got a code, soldier!

Never leave a man behind.

I'll find your boy, Miss,
hopefully in one piece.

Please, hurry.

He's got an orthodontist
appointment in an hour.

Wow, what game
should we play first?

There's Skee-Ball,
air hockey, Snee-pordee.

What about this game, Papa?

This is adorable.

I was born just
so I could meet you.

Ha-ha, holy Whack-a-Moley.

Your old man is great
at this... game?

I found you.

I found you.

Oh, you found me.

Hmm.

Ha-ha, this is so much more fun

than tangoing by myself
like I do at home.

- Ah!
- Yeah, yeah, fun game.

How many tickets did we get?

Cricket, Tango Tango
Double Luxe Ultra

is just a game for fun.

We don't get any tickets.

Huh? Well, forget this game.

What else do you want
to do, Remy?

How about the...

Kawaii photo booth?

Mm-hmm.

And how many tickets
does that one give?

None. Just wonderful
Kawaii memories.

Right.

Hmm.

Remy, what's a better memory

than cramming in as many
games as possible

before gift time?

Well... okay, let's do it.

Ah, it's like a jungle
in this jungle gym.

You seen a kid named Bryan?

B-B-Bryan?

Yeah. I saw Bryan
in No-Kid's-Land.

But you don't want to go there.

Someone ate too much pizza and,
you know.

I can't go back in there!

Don't make me go back in there!

At ease, soldier.
Your tour is over.

Time to bring Bryan home.

Now what game will give us
the most tickets?

- Uh, I mean fun?
- Ooh, how about...

- Over here.
- Oh, okay!

Oh, yes. Next game!

- Next game!
- Oh, okay.

Next game!

Faster, Remy, faster.

I just need a second.

Wow, we're really blasting
through these games.

Ha! Yup, and we still got
a bunch more to get through,

so hurry up and throw
a Skee-Ball.

All right, this is the last
of Remy's gifts.

Ready to gather everyone up
for cake and presents?

I think it's time.

But I still need more tickets.

Huh? What'd you say, buddy?

I said, uh, why don't we
help that ball along a bit?

But doesn't cheating
take the fun out of it?

- Oh, I'm having a blast.
- Whoo-hoo!

Oh, look at us.
I'll remember this day

for as long as we're friends.

You mean forever?

Oh!

Peek-a-boo. Peek-a-boo.

- Uh...
- Peek-a-boo.

Sweetie, you're very cute,

but that's not the way you play
Holy Whack-a-Moley.

Let Papa show you how it's done.

Okay.

This'll teach you
for ruining my garden.

Papa, what's gotten into you?

Nothing, I'm just
whacking the moles.

You see, moles are pests,

and pests deserve a good bonkin'
on the noggin.

Hyah!

Pow! Hyah!

Who are you?

How many tickets did I get?

Come on, come on.

All right, let's see
how you did.

One? That's it?

I'm not a fast mouse, Cricket.

Come on, Remy.
Hurry up, hurry up.

We can hit up a dozen more games
before you open presents and...

Whoa.

Here, why don't you take
a little break on the pony.

And I'll just keep getting
tickets without you.

See you at present time, buddy.

Cricket! Don't go...

without me.

Where is that kid? Bryan?

Is that you?

What do you want from me?

Easy, boy. I'm here to hel...

Aah!

Come with me, kid.

I'm going to get you
back to you mama.

You're going to take me back?

Well, I'm not going back!

Outside, I'm just a regular kid.

But in the jungly gym, I'm king!

What are you...?

Why are you like this?

Huh?

Hmm.

Baby, why'd you unplug
Papa's moles?

Moles are beautiful creatures
and deserve respect.

Sweetie, you do not want to get
between a farmer

and an invasive species.

Hey, Tilly,
got any spare tickets?

- I really need to...
- Not now, Cricket.

Papa and I are having
a discussion.

Like I said,
moles are the farmer's enemy.

So Papa's going to go back
to hitting the moles very hard.

Would you hit me
if I was a mole, Papa?

- Tickets?
- Well, if you were a mole,

you wouldn't be my daughter,
so, yes.

Every time they unplug the game
and plug it back in,

tickets come out.

Attention, friends of Remy.

Please gather at the gift table
for birthday cake

and presents.

That's a ten-hut
on the double, kids!

Oh, dang. Okay, I don't have
much time,

but I think I've got a plan.

Hmm. Oh, Tilly. Mr. Green.

Do you know where Cricket is?

I do not. I have been busy
saving moles

from a certain whack-a-maniac.

Oh. Where could Cricket be?

You can do this.
Just put on your mask, Jimmy.

They can't see your tears
behind the mask.

Ow. All right, just got to find
the main power switch and...

Ah.

Resetting all the games
will get me enough tickets

to get my best bud
the best present.

Huh?

Oh, boy.

A whole pizza just for Benny.

Whoa!

Curse my gluttony.

You're coming with me.

Never!

- Huh?
- Sorry, son.

I never leave a man behind.

Perfect. Now I just got to hurry
and collect my tickets.

All right, everyone, huddle up.

Let us sing to my birthday boy.

And here we go.

♪ Happy birthday to you ♪

♪ Happy birthday to you ♪

Hello, come to claim a... prize?

Is this enough for the T. rex?

Hmm, let me count them
real quick.

One, two...

Wow. Ten thousand exactly.

Here's your prize, kid.

Hang on, Remy.
Cricket's a'coming.

♪ Happy birthday to you ♪

And many more!

Whoa, slow down.
It's a wet floor!

Huh? Whoa!

Ah!

Uh, happy birthday?

Hey, you okay, buddy?

Listen, I know it got
all wet and smooshed,

but, I mean, cake is cake.

Plus, I got you that T. rex
you like.

Cricket, I don't care
about the cake or the T. rex.

I get cool presents every year.

This was the first birthday
party I've been able to share

with a best friend.

All I wanted was to spend time
with you.

That means I really blew it
by ditching you

to go ticket-hunting
all day, huh?

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Hmm.

Well, there's still
some party time left.

Why don't we spend
the rest of the party

doing what you want to do?

You mean it?
Even the Kawaii photo booth?

Of course we're going to do
the Koala photo booth.

Wow, they really talked it out.

You know, we could learn
from that.

How about we play
a different game,

like air hockey?

Good thinking, Papa.

Pucks deserve to be hit.

- No!
- Yes!

Thank you so much,
intense old lady,

for getting my boy.

It was an honor, ma'am.

Now let's get you
to the orthodontist, Bryan.

Well, back to hating kids.

- Oh!
- Put the ears on.

Hmm. Okay, this day
is officially too boring.

Look on the bright side,
Cricket.

Perhaps learning to cope
with the mind-numbing tedium

of our own existence could be
its own form of entertainment.

Nah. We need something
wild and exciting.

Something...

Something unexpected!

- Mama!
- Kids, what if I told you

your mama has a special surprise
waiting for you right outside?

I'd be tantalized and intrigued.

Yeah, Mom surprise.

Wait, this isn't
one of those surprises

like how Dad tricks me
into doing chores, right?

Cricket, I've got a big surprise

waiting for you
in the laundry room.

Hmm.

Oh, this is way better
than laundry, kiddos.

Introducing your very own
dirt bike.

It's... It's... It's so beautiful.

Built her from some spare parts
in the shop.

She can haul,
if I do say so myself.

Oh, my. Well, aren't you
quite the steed.

I shall tame her, and we shall
be as horse and rider.

Thank you, Mommy.

Hey, everybody.
Finished baking cookies...

No!

Hey, Bill.

You got the kids a dirt bike?

So...

- This thing safe?
- Of course.

I rode these things all the time
as a kid,

and look how I turned out.

- Hmm.
- Bill? Hurtful.

Hey, kidding.

You kids'll be careful
on that thing, right?

Absolutely, Papa...

Cricket, for Pete's sake,
slow down!

Cricket's never
slowing down again.

If only there
was something to jump!

Whee!

Whoa.

- Yeah!
- Son, look out!

Huh?

We're dead.

Gotcha.

That could have been me.

Cricket! You okay?

I-I-I don't know.

My bones ain't broke.

But the bike sure is.

Nothing a little fixing
can't fix.

- Aah!
- Cricket, it's okay.

It's just a backfire.

I ain't riding anymore.

You can't make me.

I ain't making you do nothing.

Wait. Something's wrong.

It's like my brain's
trying to think

before doing things.

- I've gone insane!
- No, dear brother.

You're finally experiencing
the fragility of life.

Like that of the humble egg.

May I?

We are but delicate
shell and yolk.

All it takes is one slip
or mistake, and...

- Tilly, quit wasting food.
- Aah!

My whole life I've been
running around acting crazy,

having no clue I was such
a fragile little egg!

Uh, Nance? A little help?

Calm down, Cricket.

You just need to be
a bit safer, is all.

I'm going to go fix up the bike.

When you're ready to hop
back on, just give me a holler.

But I don't know how to be safe.

And it's not like I know
some lame,

boring, old, safety-loving
expert who can teach me.

Sun's strong today.

Did everyone put on
their sunscreen?

Bingo-bango. Father! Father!

I can't believe I'm actually
saying this,

but can you teach me
your ways of safety?

Yes.

Yes, I can.

All right, Cricket.

The secret to staying safe
is threat assessment.

Assess threats. Got it.

And there's no better way
to assess threats

than the uh-oh technique.

I am intrigued. Please continue.

The uh-oh technique
is my own personal system

for identifying danger.

Allow me to demonstrate.

Uh-oh, some rusty nails.

Uh-oh neutralized.

Very interesting.

Uh-oh, Miss Brenda's looking
mighty mean today.

Better set up a perimeter
so no one gets kicked

by her powerful haunches.

Don't get kicked?
Okay, that's a lot to take in.

Just steer clear
of the "uh-ohs,"

and you won't get uh-ohs
of your own.

- Now you give it a try.
- All right.

Assess threats.

Hmm.

Dog is uh-oh?

Hmm.

Rake is uh-oh?

Correct.
Someone could step on that

and get bonked in the nogging.

Now you're thinking safe.

Uh-oh! A bee!

Somebody could get stung
by that bee.

Wow! Two for two.

And then, after they get stung
in the face,

they could stumble
uncontrollably,

crashing into the apple tree.

- Uh-oh!
- Yeah.

I guess that could happen.

And then the apples,
they will fall,

pelting my delicate shell
one after the other,

till I crack open like the
fragile little egg that I am.

Aah! Uh-oh.

Uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh!

That pigeon could peck my shell
till my yolk drips out.

Uh-oh! Uh-oh. Uh-oh.

These blades of grass

could slice me right open! Ow!

Uh-oh! Uh-oh! Uh-oh!

Cricket? Hey there, buddy.

- Uh-oh. Uh-oh.
- Seeing a lot of uh-oh's, huh?

The outside is full of danger.
Got to get inside.

Sir, I suggest you do the same!

Uh-oh.

And tighten the swing arm.
And we're done.

Phew. Too bad Cricket
doesn't want to try again.

How about you, Till?
Think you're ready for a ride?

Oh, I'm ready, Mama.

But the question is,
is Geraldine?

Geral-whomst?

That's what I've decided
to name the bike.

Before we ride,

we have to connect
with each other as equals.

Trust is the foundation between
a rider and her steed.

Allow me to soothe your soul
with a calming melody.

Well, while you're busy bonding,

I think I'll check in
on your brother.

Sug? You in here?

Uh, Cricket?

Hello, Mother.

Hey, kiddo.

So, what's all this?

Just taking a few
safety precautions.

Did you know the most
common place people get injured

is in their own home?

We've been living in
a death trap this whole time.

No telling how many uh-ohs
could happen.

Uh-ohs? That doesn't sound like
a Cricket thing.

Sounds more like a...

Bill.

Did you teach him this?

Maybe.

Listen, Cricket,

I wanted you to be safe,

but I wasn't expecting
this much zeal.

Oh, typical Bill.

Of course you wouldn't
understand.

What's that supposed to mean?

Well, no offense Dad,

but we all know
you don't take safety

as seriously as you should.

- Excuse me?
- I'm so safety-minded,

I invented these things
to protect my feet.

I call them hard socks.

Cricket, those already exist.
They're called shoes.

Well, well, Mr. Know-It-All.

Okay Cricket, that's enough.

Listen, I finished
fixing up the bike.

Maybe you should hop on
and try again.

Prove there's nothing
to be scared of.

Aw, you're cute.

Little baby Crickey
is never going to do anything

needlessly reckless again.

This is the new life I choose,
Mother.

Being a safe bubble-wrapped boy.

Well, off to find some more
industrial-grade bubble wrap

to use on the rest of the house.

Bill, a word.

Okay, we broke our son.

What are we going to do
to fix this?

Now hold on, Nance. I know
he's going a little overboard,

but isn't it a good thing that
he's being a bit extra careful?

I don't know.

Oh, hey, Dad?

FYI, I'm getting rid of all
the dangerous objects we have,

so all your farm tools
had to go.

- You're welcome.
- What?

Yeesh. What should we...?

- Get the boy.
- Right.

Cricket!

I can't believe I'm saying this,

but please go back
to being a reckless kid.

We just want
our old Cricket back.

No! I'll never go back
to the way I was.

Turtle maneuver.

Cricket, we're just trying
to help you.

I can't believe this.

My own family is now a threat
to my safety.

Well, uh-oh to you.

Uh-oh to you all.

Well, if that's the way
you feel.

Mama!

Sweet Geraldine and I
have forged an unbreakable bond.

We are now ready to ride.

That's my girl.

Hey, bud, your sister and I
are going to go riding.

Sure would love
to have you come along.

Wait, how can they still
be going riding?

It's too dangerous.

Don't they know
they could get hurt?

Uh-oh!

Tilly, get off that thing! Oh!

- Got your helmet on, hon?
- Right here, Mama.

- Safety roll.
- Cricket? What are you doing?

- I'm saving you.
- Well, stop it.

You're going to spook Geraldine.

Geraldine's dangerous.

- Whoa!
- Cricket!

Geraldine!

My bubble wrap armor
is caught in the throttle.

Maybe if I just yank it
real hard, like th...

Aah!

I just made it worse!

Cricket, grab my hand!

Cricket!

Just take off that bubble wrap
and control the bike!

It isn't safe.

Cricket, life isn't
some death trap!

Oh, no, not another one.

We got to finish this bridge.

Well, I guess there's only
one thing left to do.

Emergency turtle maneuver!

Look, honey, you can't just hide
from the world.

See, life is like, well,
a dirt bike.

Yeah, it can be dangerous,

but you're safer steering
than turtling.

So face your fears
and take control of your life.

Yeah, that's my boy.
Chew that plastic.

Uh, okay,

you're really getting in there.

I'm free!

Oh, no! A child! Aah!

Aah! Oh, Cricket Green.

Take control.

Good job, kid!

I'm doing it!
I'm really doing it!

Hmm. Face your fears.

Yeah!

Hooray.

Nice jump, sug. How you feel?

I... I feel alive.

See, hon?

You just needed
to find some balance.

Or maybe you just shouldn't
have a dirt bike.

Agreed.

Okay, kiddo, let's get you home.

Hey, Mom, can we pop a wheelie?

Glad to have you back, Cricket.

Whoo-hoo!

♪ I got sweat in my eyes ♪

♪ Lost a bet and got bit
By a hundred flies ♪

♪ I fell out A big old tree ♪

♪ Hit every branch
And scraped up both my knees ♪

♪ I got chased by a dog ♪

♪ Licked by a frog ♪

♪ Got a rash on my leg ♪

♪ Dropped a dozen eggs ♪

♪ I got splinters
At seven and ten ♪

♪ And tomorrow
I'll do it all again ♪