Below Deck Mediterranean (2016–…): Season 7, Episode 16 - Episode #7.16 - full transcript
Previously, on
"Below Deck Mediterranean"...
This is just too much.
If I don't see them being,
like, the father of my children,
then, like, I just don't see
the point of dating them.
Nat's just so confusing, man.
She needs to decide
does she wanna be, like,
a really good friend,
or does she wanna lie in bed
and kiss all night?
Hey, guys!
I grew up in Decatur, Alabama,
and it's just a small town,
with small-town charm.
I'm gonna shoot some
from here, okay?
Nice.
Butt up in the air,
legs crossed.
My God.
Tash told me about her ex,
they have had
difficulties for years.
So, obviously
there's always a bit of hope
she would run away
from her boyfriend,
and look who would be there.
No.
If you think you're gonna
come for me like
you come for everyone else,
you're highly ****ing mistaken.
I'll switch that bitch off
in two ****ing seconds.
She's saying you and I need
to manage our time properly,
we're the most ridiculous
chief stews...
- Wait, wait, wait.
- ...your job.
Don't talk about
a crew member in front of me.
And I called you a bitch
behind your back, number two.
- Who'd you to, Tash?
- To David.
Yesterday, he goes,
"I called you a bitch,"
and I was like, "Okay."
No, I wanted to be honest,
because that came out
like I hate you.
I'm glad you were honest.
No, I told her, I hate calling
women bitches,
that really irritates me,
when...
He did.
Are you being a bitch?
- You and Captain Sandy?
- Are you being a bitch?
- How am I a bitch?
- You and Captain Sandy?
She stepped in
and she said, "No."
I've got nothing to speak about.
I told you what
I told you, facts.
No, you didn't mention
a few other things.
I've got nothing else more to
explain to you than what I did.
If you're looking for attention,
you're not gonna get it from me.
- Kyle...
- Look at you now.
"Look at you now."
- Cut this bullsh**
- Kyle, pipe down.
And Nat, stop.
BELOW DECK MEDITERRANEAN*
Season 07 Episode 16
Episode Title: "The Scorpion Queen"
Aired on: October 17, 2022.
Looking for attention.
Yeah.
- Cut this bullsh**
- Kyle, pipe down.
You've been ****ing Tash**
I'm literally the most calmest
person sitting here.
- Kyle...
- I'm ****ing calm. Read me.
You're the one causing
drama already.
No, it's not...
You been having this fun time.
I ****ing apologized to you,
you got more problems with me.
Face your ****ing sh**
Yeah, it's not me,
it's the team.
- You just did it.
- Guys, stop.
Kyle, come on.
I know that you're not trying to
be a ****ing knob
or whatever, but...
I'm not gonna apologize
again for this.
But it wasn't...
it wasn't that type of vibe,
it was very chill.
I'm not saying...
Yeah, but Nat, you acted
super off to me, and, like,
all I've done is try and
be super nice to you.
And I'm sorry that I
didn't...
No, not you,
I'm speaking about me.
My team, I just feel like
everything's just exploded
into this big drama.
This is the most traumatic,
dramatic table
I've ever sat at in my life.
It is becoming a ****ing
sh** show.
I feel like I need to stop it,
but I don't know...
I don't know what to do.
Trust me, it's not
normally this wild.
I get along with everybody,
but I'm not having someone yell,
"Face the facts, bitch,"
and walk off.
- Bosun's chair, sit down.
- Bosun's chair, sit...
- stand... stand up!
- Stand up!
So, what's the plan?
I'll sit at the opposite
side of the table.
But I'm not gonna shut up for
people who constantly attack.
No, I appreciate the way
that you stick up for
all of the crew.
No!
I understand I'm in a
restaurant setting,
I understand why I'm,
like, trying to remain calm,
when normally,
if I were called a bitch,
that is not how I'd remain.
If you wanna see angry, wait
till we get back to the yacht
when I actually give that
'tude back to Kyle.
And it's, like, the one thing
that I learned in conflict
is that if you're in public,
deal with it later.
- Yeah, but what can I do?
- Private.
- I'm sitting here calm.
- In private.
You deal with it later.
Not at all, after what
you just said to me.
We are not any longer...
we are colleagues,
we are not friends
after how you
just acted to me.
Kyle.
Okay, that's tragic, but...
I actually have.
- Kyle, please.
- I don't care, Kyle.
Just ignore what she's saying,
block it out, and then say,
okay, you know what, cool.
I have no idea what this is
about, but fortunately enough,
in college, when people
got drunk, they fought.
I would try
to lessen the tension
- Nat, look, I'm not...
- Reid, keep it to yourself.
I think you guys just
need to hold your peace.
Tash, there's holding peace
and then there's ****.
You know what you need
to say to him.
- You don't speak...
- I'm not at work right now.
- But...
- It's happened in work.
I've spoken to...
It happened in work and you
were there, you...
- It's your role to say...
- I wasn't there.
You can't call someone a bitch,
that's your colleague.
I don't know what happened,
I'm sorry.
Oh, don't worry,
I'll tell you.
Tash, you're chief stew,
you're the chief stew.
If you want to, like this
not to happen out of work,
you should have handled
this within work hours.
All right, let's go.
She's got no balls whatsoever.
Hello, hello!
What up, Gs.
That's really cute.
Don't sit at the end.
We don't need gaps
in the table, Dave.
They don't want to sit
next to each other.
We've got two charters left.
I never have to see
Nat's face again,
she never has to see mine.
All three of you,
you're interior.
Like, everyone speak.
I don't want to
be affected in this.
You're the chief stew,
so you're affected in this,
because you haven't stood
up for me and said
when he called me bitch.
You are the chief stew.
You've not addressed
my colleague.
Guys, you're adults.
I'm not sticking up for anybody.
- Period, she hasn't.
- She hasn't
Guys, if you wanna talk,
argue it out between you both.
I don't need to...
No, Tash, you are
the chief stew.
What do you want me to say?
You called me a bitch within
work hours in front of the...
the captain heard it.
You called me a bitch...
It's got nothing to do with me.
You called me a bitch, so the...
Look at that.
I will...
Look at your attitude!
Look at your attitude.
That is the most tragic thing
I've ever seen in
my absolute life.
- Nat ****ing hell.
- Okay, well, I'm off.
Mzi, I found a McDonald's
for you.
I walked inside,
I ordered six cheeseburgers,
and they said,
"Sorry, we're closed."
Where is she?
Right now, what needs
to happen is...
- Is I go home?
- You go home... Yeah.
With Storm...
Storm, you're gonna
go home with Nat.
- No.
- Yes, you are.
I don't think she wants to.
No, Storm, shut the **** up,
you're gonna go home with Nat.
Sure.
Define "bitchy"
how you want to...
that's immature bitchy attitude.
I want to literally go and
put knives in Kyle's pillow.
I went on my hands and
knees to apologize to her.
She accepted it,
and you still wanna
attack me across the table.
Why don't we
stop talking about it
and talk about something else?
I'm really sorry how
everything's turned out.
The thing is, I'm glad
I got... I'm glad
said this from day one,
yes, I was angry at the table
before, obviously, but that's
angry because to be honest...
What's that?
I don't know,
I just put it in my bra.
- I was annoyed.
- You had every right to be.
You forgot to mention,
it's like,
you know how the situation
happens with, like...
Yes, of course.
I apologize.
Okay, guys, what
the **** is going on?
Well, of course, I have your
back more than anything.
This situation needs
to be resolved.
You know, like,
you're the chief stew.
At some point you have to have
a bit of professionalism and be,
like, right, Nat's not okay,
I'm gonna speak to her.
I just wanna deal with
this tomorrow.
Like, I'm not taking any sides.
You three need to have a chat.
Perfect.
Tomorrow morning, you three
need to have a chat.
I know we don't have
much to talk about,
but I don't wanna be in
the middle of that.
I've been ****ing
frustrated with Nat
and how things have been for us.
I don't wanna get hurt,
you know?
But to see her like this,
you know, I still...
I care about her.
I just wanna make sure
she's okay, yeah.
Mm-hmm.
Hey!
Lads and ladies, let's go.
- You'll be all right, Tash.
- Yeah.
There's only 10 days left.
I appreciate your support
when I've needed it.
Always. I'm always there.
Not just today, always.
What time is it,
is it midnight?
Tash.
What?
You're a very complicated
person, Tash.
I know, I'm sorry
I'm not a vibe.
I just want the truth,
that's all, nothing else.
I kind of probably should
give up at this point,
but I still think
there is a little bit of hope
with me and Tash.
I can't help it,
it's just the way I feel.
Huh?
Let's go.
Ah... oh!
No, come in, dude!
No, he's in a bad mood.
What up, D-Money?
Oh, yeah.
It was just a bad
argument tonight.
Period.
Ah, thank you, my friend.
Ooh.
sh** day and
a sh** night.
Going to bed now.
Okay, good night.
Night-night.
How was your night?
Yeah, I don't know,
it was fine.
Coming up...
Are you sure this is safe?
Yeah, yeah, you'll be fine.
Honestly, I've never
been in a tender
with swells this bad before.
- ...Ing gnarly.
- Whoa.
Oh! Oh!
I just feel like
I have no need
to even bother
going out next time.
Oh, my God.
Um, ****
I was like, you all
need to ****ing speak.
Yeah.
This wind is making
things difficult.
Ooh.
Jesus, I'm drunk.
The wind is terrible.
I do want Dave to realize
that there are boundaries,
and that there is this line
that he cannot cross.
Like, I don't wanna
go back into that whole mess
that we were in before.
Oh sh**
I've got enough on
my plate right now.
That's the last thing I want.
**** it.
I've done the swim platform
on main deck.
I'm just gonna go around with
a chamois on the railings,
because they're all sal-tay.
It's gonna be, like, over
30 knots of wind in here.
The swells are massive,
what a bummer.
David, Natasha, Storm,
meet me in the crew mess
for a preference sheet meeting.
Copy.
Okay.
Charter number eight, and
we're all still together.
Hell, yeah.
Strong team.
Garold and Catherine Miller
are no strangers to luxury boats
and have their own
58-foot sailing yacht.
They are looking forward to
celebrating
their 25th wedding anniversary
and having the crew tend
to their every need.
Lila, their youngest daughter,
is a yacht broker,
and she's looking forward
to celebrating
her 21st birthday on board.
What are you gonna do?
Well, when they arrive
I'm gonna smash out some sushi.
Then for their
25th anniversary celebration,
so, a Spanish theme, yeah,
we can either go tapas
or we can just do
a big paella.
Great idea.
The Millers spend their summers
jet-skiing, snorkeling,
so they want all water toys
out all the time.
Too bad, it doesn't look like
we're gonna get off the dock.
sh**
We have a major weather
system coming in.
This is not gonna change.
There is no way I'll be able
to get off the dock,
because it'll be
so rough out there
there's no protection
in this weather.
The pressure's on, huh?
- Thank you.
- Thank you.
So, port side
hasn't been washed?
- Yeah, it has.
- It has?
Yeah, I'm just washing
the windows now.
It just needs drying.
Okay.
- Good morning.
- Hi.
Yeah.
Well, okay.
So, this is the meeting I would
have liked to have yesterday,
but it actually
ended up happening out.
Someone gets alcohol
into their system,
it just gets heightened
and raged.
There was no need
to all be shouting.
That was just...
for me, the push-over was
that cabin yesterday.
Then it wasn't just a situation
where you called me a bitch,
it was a situation where you
actually apparently got really
hotheaded to the point
that Captain Sandy
actually stepped in,
which I've heard,
and said that's not appropriate.
I agree that situation did
happen, but I came down to you,
and I feel like I was wrong,
and that's 100 percent
what I took on me.
I appreciate that apology,
but then you went ahead
and called me
a bitch again last night.
So, you've just done it again,
so that apology
means nothing to me.
Last night, in an out-of-work
zone, you called me a bitch now
within my... which isn't a funny.
You've then called me a bitch
at the table...
And I called you that, and
I also said that to your face.
Exactly, you said it
at the dinner table
in front of the crew.
It was not appropriate,
and you last night...
And you attacking me
in front of the crew
or in that time
is appropriate?
- You're the...
- You're talking about
Tash being professional,
you're talking about me
being professional...
get your sh** together and
you start acting professional.
I said... see, look how
aggressive you're getting.
Look how aggressive
your approach is, sis.
When that voice comes out,
that is exactly...
Look at your voice.
- Kyle?
- Yeah.
The difference here is that
I say stuff to people's face,
not behind their back.
And if you wanna go
down that trail...
- And I said everything...
- I will take that.
I disagree with this,
because I have heard
that I was called a bad manager,
I can't manage my time,
I'm unapproachable...
I've never said you were
unapproachable.
And these are all the things
that were said behind my back.
Things get said about people
in heat of the moment,
and I understand that,
because clearly,
everyone said something.
I think maybe going forward, if
you feel like there's something
that's upsetting you
or needs to change,
then I think we just
speak about it first.
Stop arguments later down
the line of us getting stressed,
and I think we just try
to make things better.
Okay, I agree with that.
Nat, I'm not blowing
smoke in your ass,
I'm saying facts is facts.
Work-wise, you're outstanding.
I am genuinely apologetic
for the use of the words.
I have no excuse but complete
exhaustion,
and sorry, I just...
Can we just stop bitching now,
because we...
I naturally defend myself.
I grew up having to be that.
I was bullied immensely in
high school
and primary school,
thrown in bins.
That was a very
tough time for me.
With Nat, I haven't
been thinking
where she's coming from.
It doesn't feel right.
Okay, new rule...
no one talk sh** about
each other because I'm happy...
I wouldn't say... like I love us
talking sh** about other people.
- Yeah.
- Maybe not interior.
Let's not change
too many things now.
- We're all good in here!
- We're fine.
Coming up...
There's no chance.
I thought there was.
I just wanna run away.
The weather looks ****ing sh**
Oh, wow, it's coming off
beautifully.
Towels, towels.
Towels, towels, more towels.
Yeah, I think I need a coffee
and I'm gonna grab
a doughnut, too.
Did you...
are you having a coffee, Kyle?
Yeah, I'm making coffees.
That's all right,
I can just...
Sorry?
I'll make it.
What?
All crew, all crew,
we have provisions.
All crew, we have provisions
on the dock.
Copy.
When did the golf balls arrive?
Very light, this is going
to be party decorations
for the next two days.
All crew, all crew, meet
in the main salon in your whites
at 11:55 for a 12:00 arrival.
Copy for interior.
Oh, my God, it's just...
I don't know what
this knot's from.
Ow!
I'm hungry.
Crew mess looks good.
The guests are actually
walking up to us right now.
- We are coming home.
- It's a sick boat.
All crew to the dock, please,
all crew to the dock
for guest arrival.
- Oh, it's...
- It's beautiful.
Yeah, I love it.
Oh, I'm so excited.
Oh, and there's our crew.
- Hi, guys.
- Hi!
- Hey!
- Hello!
Oh, my God, it's so elegant.
- Hi, I'm Garold.
- Nice to meet you.
- Pleasure to meet you.
- Hi, I'm Natasha.
Lila, nice to meet you.
Oh, I wore my boating shoes, so
I can just slip 'em right off.
Dad's got the Guccis on.
- Welcome aboard...
- Thank you.
Your Home away from home.
- Yeah.
- Okay.
Our chief stew is gonna
show you around.
Great.
And then I'm gonna come chat
to you about the weather.
- Okay.
- All right.
Okay.
The good weather, right,
it's beautiful.
Oh, God.
- Yeah, at least it's sunny.
- It's so sunny.
I don't know if it's the...
we're not leaving
the dock today,
but I'll tell you about
it in there.
- Okay.
- Oh, my God.
Perfect tanning weather.
They see sunny skies, and
right now the wind's not bad.
However, on the outside
of this port it's really bad,
and wind brings waves, period.
There are big waves.
I'm literally gonna cry.
- That's a bummer.
- What's that?
That we're not
leaving the dock.
Yeah, I mean, it is a bummer,
can you believe it?
All right, thank you.
- Here we go, cheers.
- Thank you.
Cheers, Li.
Kinda look like a
'90s porn star right now.
- Me?
- Yeah, you do, very much.
- Moustache and glasses.
- It's the yellow lenses, yeah.
Yeah.
You're taking us on the tour?
Yes, I am, is everyone ready?
- Yes.
- Of course.
Ooh, this is so pretty.
Wow.
Oh, so, yeah,
here's our lunch table.
Gorgeous.
It's ridiculous, isn't it?
So, this seems like
the party place, up here.
- This is the party pad.
- This is the party pad.
This is where we
gotta have my birthday.
Yeah, we kinda heat this up
because it's a bit cold.
I'll make it hotter
when I get in.
Oh, wow.
Yeah.
Is this all of it?
Yeah.
Lunch will be served
in 10 minutes,
so you've gotta hurry up.
All right, we'll hurry up.
We'll speed up.
Don't be shellfish.
Is there a certain time you
might like to have lunch?
Do we wanna finish with
the tour, freshen up,
maybe get settled a little,
and then have lunch?
Yeah.
- So, should we say, like, 1:30?
- 1:00?
Let's say 1:00.
What's the beam throughout here?
Like, this feels kinda,
like, short, almost.
Do you... you mean, like,
it's quite small?
The width.
Yeah, like, the beam
of this room.
Oh, I can find out for
you if you like.
- Yeah?
- Yeah, sure.
I'm curious.
I've had a charter broker
as a guest before,
and it was actually a nightmare.
He tested us.
He went around the boat
and he did things
to check that we'd checked.
He stuck, like, a piece
of chewing gum behind an apple
in a fruit bowl to check that we
were checking the fruit bowls.
What year is this boat,
do you remember, 2018?
It's 2016, '17.
Dave, Dave, Tasha.
They would like lunch at 1:00.
Hi.
Hi, I wanted to say hi.
- Since you're a boater...
- Yeah.
I was gonna come
talk to you guys.
- So, this is what we're...
- Working with?
Yeah, it's terrible.
Oh, gosh.
Yeah, so this is the wave,
so see this?
- Oh, my God.
- This is meters.
- Yeah.
- So, it's crazy.
It's bad.
Right now, we'd be...
it would be dangerous to leave.
Yeah.
What do you think tomorrow?
Well, we can't leave the dock.
Tomorrow, we look
at the weather.
Yeah, we'll just cross
our fingers.
The minute it lays down,
I'll take off.
Yeah. Okay.
Dave?
1:00 for lunch?
- Davey?
- Yeah.
Thirty minutes to lunch.
Thirty minutes?
- They want it at 1:00?
- Yeah, 30 minutes to lunch.
They want it at...
Where's my parents?
Oh, here they are.
I need a drink.
What's that?
How am I being rude?
I just, I... I... it's not
my fault we're out of mint.
You've been rude to me
all morning, Dave.
Sorry, how have
I been rude to you?
I haven't said anything.
I'm just getting
on with my job.
Exactly, that's the thing.
Well, then...
You won't communicate
with me.
All right.
The wind here,
but this is the waves.
Yeah.
It's deceiving, because
you can't see the swell.
Do you want me to find a bay
that we can go
and put you in the water
with some of the toys?
Duck out with the tender,
check it out.
All right, Courts and I are
gonna go and have a look, okay?
Yeah.
I wanna go, like,
swimming or something.
I wanna go do something, yeah.
Look at how cute Mom looks.
See if she'll marry me
another 25 years.
We're gonna go to the other
side of the marina
to go see if it's accessible for
us to actually get in the water.
Yeah.
Will you tie my top a
little tighter, actually?
Mom.
Thanks, mate.
Okay. You can go, Courts.
See, look at the horizon,
it's ****ing gnarly.
Yeah, man.
**** me.
You sure this is safe?
Yeah, yeah, you'll be fine.
Okay, punch it,
straight up the middle.
**** me, like, honestly,
I've never been in a tender
with swells this bad before.
Whoa.
All I can see is these
massive ****ing waves,
like, holy ****.
No.
Yeah.
- I'm hungry.
- This is so awesome.
Okay, they're having
a seat now.
We're gonna start
with the bread.
Okay, great.
Thank you.
- You're welcome.
- Good job.
My stomach's going.
I took Courtney to where we
usually do our water sports...
huge swells.
Not safe for the guests at all.
Okay, so you went through...
We went through the bridge,
we went to the opposite side,
and it's not safe.
Honestly, the whole boat
was like this at one point,
and like this.
- Hectic.
- Yeah.
So, definitely
not going out now.
Shall I take them to, like,
a museum or something?
Just phone Rico and ask him
can they organize
a tour guide and some cars?
Yeah, okay, good.
I'm glad you checked it
out without the guests.
- All right, cool, thanks.
- Yeah, me too.
That's always good.
It's just bad timing, and
especially for this charter,
they're super active.
All they wanna do
is water sports.
We need to think of something
or we're totally screwed.
Sake, sake, sake,
boom, boom, boom.
And then you chug it.
Oh, yeah, get it!
So proud, oh!
So proud of my girls.
Hey, dude, the ocean's
too dangerous
for me to take them on.
It's terrible out there.
Is there any way that
we can take them
on a guided tour today?
I know it's pretty late notice.
We recently went to some sort of
fort and restaurants and stuff.
Is that something we
could potentially do?
Let me know, thanks.
Ooh, what are these?
Prawn, avocado,
and spicy salmon.
Oh, my God,
this looks beautiful.
Thank you, what about the food?
Ah, this is the life.
I'm trying to think
about what's next.
Yeah, right?
At 3:30, we need them
on the swim platform.
We're taking them
to the cannons,
and at least we can get them off
the boat for, like, two hours.
Thank God.
Wow, you polished off
those wontons, huh?
She might have been worried
that you were gonna take them.
I think she was.
- Nat?
- Hi, girl.
Kyle, you can do the cabins,
turning them over.
You can go on a break.
Copy.
I'm, like, stuffed.
I wanna walk around
the boat a little.
Let's go.
I'm gonna trip on this thing.
Kyle, Nat's gonna head
on her break now.
Well, where is everyone?
I wanna ****ing be underway
and sit in those
...ing superhero chairs.
Hey, guys, we've organized for
a private tour to this...
every afternoon at 12:00 and
at 4:00 they set off cannons.
Okay.
So, basically, in half an hour,
if you could make your way
to the stern, to the back
of the boat,
we're gonna put you in
a bunch of cars,
and then set the cannons
of for you guys.
- Oh, up there?
- Yeah.
- All right?
- Yeah.
Hey Courts, will you get
changed into your polo?
Yeah.
You, Mzi, and Reid are
gonna go with them.
Okay, cool.
You guys are leaving in 15
minutes, okay?
Okay, sweet,
I'll go get changed.
Ready, Lila Rose?
Yes.
Back into my schoolboy outfit.
Yeah, hello, hello.
- Hey, little buddy!
- Hey, little buddy!
All right, I have
my phone, right?
That's the most important thing,
to take pictures.
I don't, but I don't need it.
You may call me
a 12-year-old boy, but...
- Hi.
- Hi.
All right, enjoy, guys.
Have a good time, yeah?
- Yeah, kids in one?
- Yeah.
Let's go shoot some cannons!
Hey.
Why didn't you come in earlier,
I've been waiting.
Because I thought you
were having a snooze.
Yeah, but I was waiting for you.
What exactly is
going on right now?
We're going to a tower.
We're going to a tower,
because they let of cannons.
Basically, these big cannons
go off every day.
Have a cuddle, couple of kisses,
and you fell asleep with me.
You guys, you think we're gonna
get off the dock tomorrow?
I think we should
get off tomorrow.
Awesome.
I hope we're able
to get off the dock.
This is our last
few days together.
Yeah.
Storm's really in
the good books at the moment.
You know, I've been a little
stressed lately with, like,
what's going on with,
like, the interior,
so it's nice to have him,
like, around to, like, cuddle.
It makes me happy to see him.
Don't tell him I said that.
Whoa.
Oh, my God!
Hey, guys, we're
gonna go this way.
We're off to see some cannons.
Okay, are we good,
have we got everyone?
All right, we have seven
minutes still, we're okay.
Go, go, and we'll get you some
drinks, ready for the cannons.
Oh, what can I get you to drink?
What do you have?
Prosecco, wine,
beers, champagne.
- Rosé.
- Rosé?
This is amazing.
That's beautiful.
In that corner, you know,
see where the red boat...
- Yeah.
- The big red ships are?
To the right of them
in that little bay there,
that's where we wanna take you
to do water sports tomorrow.
Okay.
If we can't leave the dock,
then we'll head over there.
And it looks protected,
at least.
If the weather's okay, are we
gonna go out into the open?
Yeah, so, Captain Sandy wants
to obviously
take the boat out
as soon as we can.
So, if the swell gets
a bit better, we will.
It's really hard to keep guests
entertained for, like,
a full ****ing day,
like, 12 hours.
They're all sailors,
they're all in yachting.
Like, yeah, it's not
a great situation.
I think the cannon's
about to go.
Evening gun, fire!
- ****
- Oh!
****
Coming up...
Do you guys not think
dinner's taking a long time?
You can speak up, but...
- Well...
- Just pace yourself, it's fine.
But, like, really.
Are these ready to go?
There are too many
people hanging around.
Yeah.
What's going on out here?
We're going Spanish theme.
They want the theme
to match the food.
Is today the anniversary?
Yeah, can you believe
they've been together 25 years?
They don't look old
enough for that.
Oh, my God, are you playing
with your balls again, honey?
- Yeah.
- Hope you enjoyed that.
- We loved it!
- Yes, that was very cool.
So, if you want to ask
any questions,
we just move near
the guns there,
and I will give you
any answers you like.
Okay.
So, do we think that tomorrow
we're gonna get off the dock?
Right here.
Thanks, hon.
Have we go that Mad Hatter's
cake stand somewhere?
Yeah, it's in the bilge.
I'll pull it out now.
Apparently we're gonna use it
for dinner tonight on the table.
Oh, okay.
Talk to me,
what's the dinner plan?
It's paella.
No.
sh**
So, I need massive spot
on the table?
Set it up inside, then.
- Okay.
- How many starters?
I'm kind of just doing
as many as I can.
- Are you okay?
- Not really.
I'm just having a hard time
processing it.
There's no chance.
I thought there was.
But it's so dumb,
it's stupid.
Like, I just wanna run away.
- Come on, David.
- ...Ing hell.
Guys, that was awesome.
Thanks, Dad!
Yeah, yeah, yeah,
beep, beep.
Dave seems like a bit
in a mood, doesn't he?
Oh, he's not even
talking to me at all?
Why, what has happened?
Not even a word.
He's been messaging me,
so I told him to stop.
Oh, you ****.
- Right.
- Silly things, it's just...
Yeah.
Well, hang in there.
You're doing so good
to maintain.
The guests are here.
Are you able to come down
and greet
with these sangrias
that I've made?
- Yeah.
- Welcome back.
Thank you.
Hi, guys, welcome back.
- How are you?
- Hi.
How was that?
Can I take it from you?
Yes, please, thank you.
More drinks?
Sangria.
You'll probably have time
to, like, freshen up,
and if you wanna change.
I'm thinking, like,
dinner at 8:00?
- I mean, I don't know.
- Dinner at 8:30...
Well, yeah, 8:00, 8:30?
Perfect.
Ah.
We look good, baby.
I feel like
I'm, like, a housewife.
I'm about to bake
you a cherry pie.
I want you to
pop my cherry pie.
Look at you.
Hey, you're looking
a little crazy!
So, tensions are high.
What?
Like, I went down to the galley,
and he's being
so short with her.
Ing hell.
Deck crew, deck crew,
we're gonna have to all help
interior however we can.
Say!
Do you want any help,
you want me to wash up?
- No, I'm good, mate.
- Okay, no worries.
No, yeah, all good.
Hi.
Wow, this is awesome.
Who did that?
- Tash.
- It was a magician.
- No, Tash did the roses.
- Beautiful.
Considering we're on the dock,
the crew are pulling
out every stop.
The table setting, the themes,
the courses that David
has to make to keep up.
That's a lot of pressure
on the chef.
They're all, like, committed
to this, which I'm really happy,
to try to keep
the guests happy.
How clever is that?
Okay, Dave, what do
you need for cutlery?
Just need, like, ramekins
and stuff, do you know?
Little dishes just
to put this stuff in.
Oh, my God, that's so cool.
Mom, look what they
did for you guys.
Oh my God,
I love that, it's so pretty.
Yeah, well, let's eat.
- Did you see them on...
- I'm starving, Mom.
I'm so sorry you're so hungry.
- I think we're...
- Are you so hungry?
We have to wait a moment,
though.
When are we eating, at 8:30?
Hey, happy anniversary.
Thanks, honey.
I love you.
I love you, too.
Don't fill up to
the top, top, top.
So, we've got rye
and cacao bread.
Okay, rye and cacao.
What can I use for this,
can I use this?
I don't know, man,
you have to...
- that's not my...
- Okay.
**** it, I don't know.
sh**, he's in a mood,
and not good at all.
Thank you, fantastic, yeah.
Ladies and gentlemen,
I'm sorry to disturb you.
Obviously, there's no rush,
but to let you know,
we're ready for service when
you are at the top, yeah.
- Oh, great.
- Awesome.
Let's go.
Yeah, come hang.
- This is beautiful.
- This looks so great.
The wines will roll out shortly,
but we'll start with
the waters, all right?
Let's get this going.
Awesome.
Would you like sparkling
or still water?
Sparkling, please.
Okay, Davey, guests are
at the table,
they've started with the breads,
we're filling in waters now,
all right?
Okay, mate.
Oh, my God, what are you making?
It's called a leg-spreader.
- Oh, my God.
- I'm just making it up.
Tash is busy with cocktails,
so I will be here.
Okay.
Do you mind if I start with
these while...
You can go, yeah,
you can do as you want, man.
He said that was rye bread
with cacao, the dark one.
With what?
- Cacao, chocolate.
- Rye with cacao chocolate.
Oh. Sorry, I thought
you said "with cow."
- Yeah, with cow.
- No, cacao.
Well, for you it's cow.
Are these ready to go?
Ing ****.
We have the
Spanish tortilla.
Here, we have cod.
Shall I get a tray for this?
Yeah, all right, mate.
Can you take one of
these trays, please?
- Yes.
- And...
Hello.
- Ooh!
- Hola!
There are too many people
hanging around.
Yeah.
Too many people
asking questions.
Random plastic bag,
may look like rubbish**
they use this for stuff.
So, pop that in here.
These underwear...
dirty, don't touch them.
- Which would you like?
- What is it again?
- This is cod.
- Yeah?
In flour batter,
and then we have
mentega over there.
Yeah, I'll pass.
Thank you.
No worries.
You're welcome.
I don't know what
I've been told...
where do these plates go?
If this has been used,
throw it away?
It's not been used,
it's a shower cap.
- It's a shower?
- Cap.
Oh, for the head.
So, what's coming next?
Chicken and prawn paella.
There you go.
Dave, just to let you know,
we're clearing now.
- You're clearing now, okay.
- Ready for the paella.
Okay.
Food.
So, we're gonna put
the paella out,
we'll go round the table,
all round the table with it.
Oh, I thought we were gonna just
come and present it and be,
like, here's your chicken...
Yeah, so, all round the table,
exactly,
and then we go back
to the top bar...
To the bar, yeah.
And then we serve it on the...
you'll ask if they
want chicken or prawn.
Then we'll serve it and then
we'll dish it out to them, yeah?
Yeah.
Okay.
It's unprofessional that
Dave's trying to give me
the cold shoulder just
from trying to set
a boundary towards him.
Our job is communicating,
especially with these guests.
- Is it clear?
- It's clear now.
- So, are we ready to start?
- Yeah.
- See what I'm doing here?
- Yeah.
We're diamonding it off to say
"We've been here, we've
touched your toilet paper."
Do you guys not think
dinner's taking a long time?
You can speak up, like...
- Well, it's...
- Just pace yourself, it's fine.
- Like, relax, enjoy.
- But, like, really...
Oh, they're bringing sangria...
uh-oh.
- Okay, we'll ask him.
- What's taking a while...
yeah, it's taking a
little while.
No, Dad, at any restaurant,
we'd be, like, what
the hell's going on.
No, it's fine.
Primary's daughter
was saying, like,
"If this was a restaurant,
he'd be complaining."
Really?
Yeah, so why isn't
he complaining now.
Primary's daughter,
Lila, they're not stoked.
We're gonna go to the restroom.
I'm just annoyed,
and at this point it's
just, like, embarrassing.
The service is supposed
to be seven-star service.
It's been slow as ****
all night,
What?
Why?
And the next course, how long...
- when is that gonna be ready?
- Yes.
I'll go check in the galley.
So, tomorrow, off the dock,
or what do we think
about tomorrow?
Positive thoughts
we're getting off the dock,
and we're gonna be going
down that slide tomorrow.
Hopefully.
If you're going on that slide,
you better have one.
I have special clothes for that.
Everything's strapped in.
There'll be, like, duct tape.
Okay, so three chicken...
Sorry?
It seems like there's
some major tension
between David and Natasha,
and I'm not sure why.
So, I'm going to keep my eye on
them so they stay at that level.
So, here's the one with both.
Oh, that's delicious-looking.
Oh, thank you.
Tell me what you want as
we go, and then...
Three shrimp, I think I said...
did I say?
And two chicken.
My rice is crispy.
Dad, you probably
shouldn't eat that,
I don't think it's that good.
I don't think it's
seven-star amazing.
I think it's good, I just
don't think it's, like, wow.
It's just, like, different.
It's not, like, what you're
used to, I feel like.
What?
I'm not gonna say
sh** now, yeah.
I feel like telling Dave
about this paella right now
is not gonna help any situation,
because to make a new paella
would take around 45 minutes.
And these guests clearly
do not wanna wait
any longer for any more food.
Sorry, it's just,
like, oh, my God.
It's not the best thing
he's made us yet.
Yeah, no.
Can I take anything else,
Dave, or is it all up there now?
- That's it for now.
- Okay.
They're eating away, yeah?
Yeah, they're all happy,
thanks, Dave.
All right, good night,
everybody.
Thank you guys so
much for dinner.
- Bye!
- Thank you so much.
- Good night!
- Keep it separated, guys.
Wait, Isaac, remember, boys in
the bunk and girls in the room.
You go to your room, and...
Ai-yi-yi.
Just keep the buns
in the bread aisle.
What time do you
want me to go down?
You guys...
you can go down now.
Okay, they're going down.
Dinner was amazing.
Kind of.
Oh, she's literally gorgeous.
You're so in love.
Are you kidding me?
You're in love.
Am I allowed to appreciate the
fact that somebody's really hot?
- Yeah.
- She's very hot.
Happy anniversary.
I love you.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do,
and if you do,
- name it after me, okay?
- Nope.
Whew, what a night.
- Good night.
- Okay, sweet dreams.
Good night.
You're going to bed?
See you in the morning.
Is there talk of us going
off the dock tomorrow?
I don't think anyone knows,
to be honest.
Can't see it happening, but...
See you later, tip.
Yeah.
All right, see you
in the morning.
All right, thank you.
Oh! Oh!
What was that?
- Nat!
- What just happened?
- Oh!
- Kyle!
Oh sh**
- Oh!
- Kyle has fallen.
Ah, oh.
"Below Deck Mediterranean"...
This is just too much.
If I don't see them being,
like, the father of my children,
then, like, I just don't see
the point of dating them.
Nat's just so confusing, man.
She needs to decide
does she wanna be, like,
a really good friend,
or does she wanna lie in bed
and kiss all night?
Hey, guys!
I grew up in Decatur, Alabama,
and it's just a small town,
with small-town charm.
I'm gonna shoot some
from here, okay?
Nice.
Butt up in the air,
legs crossed.
My God.
Tash told me about her ex,
they have had
difficulties for years.
So, obviously
there's always a bit of hope
she would run away
from her boyfriend,
and look who would be there.
No.
If you think you're gonna
come for me like
you come for everyone else,
you're highly ****ing mistaken.
I'll switch that bitch off
in two ****ing seconds.
She's saying you and I need
to manage our time properly,
we're the most ridiculous
chief stews...
- Wait, wait, wait.
- ...your job.
Don't talk about
a crew member in front of me.
And I called you a bitch
behind your back, number two.
- Who'd you to, Tash?
- To David.
Yesterday, he goes,
"I called you a bitch,"
and I was like, "Okay."
No, I wanted to be honest,
because that came out
like I hate you.
I'm glad you were honest.
No, I told her, I hate calling
women bitches,
that really irritates me,
when...
He did.
Are you being a bitch?
- You and Captain Sandy?
- Are you being a bitch?
- How am I a bitch?
- You and Captain Sandy?
She stepped in
and she said, "No."
I've got nothing to speak about.
I told you what
I told you, facts.
No, you didn't mention
a few other things.
I've got nothing else more to
explain to you than what I did.
If you're looking for attention,
you're not gonna get it from me.
- Kyle...
- Look at you now.
"Look at you now."
- Cut this bullsh**
- Kyle, pipe down.
And Nat, stop.
BELOW DECK MEDITERRANEAN*
Season 07 Episode 16
Episode Title: "The Scorpion Queen"
Aired on: October 17, 2022.
Looking for attention.
Yeah.
- Cut this bullsh**
- Kyle, pipe down.
You've been ****ing Tash**
I'm literally the most calmest
person sitting here.
- Kyle...
- I'm ****ing calm. Read me.
You're the one causing
drama already.
No, it's not...
You been having this fun time.
I ****ing apologized to you,
you got more problems with me.
Face your ****ing sh**
Yeah, it's not me,
it's the team.
- You just did it.
- Guys, stop.
Kyle, come on.
I know that you're not trying to
be a ****ing knob
or whatever, but...
I'm not gonna apologize
again for this.
But it wasn't...
it wasn't that type of vibe,
it was very chill.
I'm not saying...
Yeah, but Nat, you acted
super off to me, and, like,
all I've done is try and
be super nice to you.
And I'm sorry that I
didn't...
No, not you,
I'm speaking about me.
My team, I just feel like
everything's just exploded
into this big drama.
This is the most traumatic,
dramatic table
I've ever sat at in my life.
It is becoming a ****ing
sh** show.
I feel like I need to stop it,
but I don't know...
I don't know what to do.
Trust me, it's not
normally this wild.
I get along with everybody,
but I'm not having someone yell,
"Face the facts, bitch,"
and walk off.
- Bosun's chair, sit down.
- Bosun's chair, sit...
- stand... stand up!
- Stand up!
So, what's the plan?
I'll sit at the opposite
side of the table.
But I'm not gonna shut up for
people who constantly attack.
No, I appreciate the way
that you stick up for
all of the crew.
No!
I understand I'm in a
restaurant setting,
I understand why I'm,
like, trying to remain calm,
when normally,
if I were called a bitch,
that is not how I'd remain.
If you wanna see angry, wait
till we get back to the yacht
when I actually give that
'tude back to Kyle.
And it's, like, the one thing
that I learned in conflict
is that if you're in public,
deal with it later.
- Yeah, but what can I do?
- Private.
- I'm sitting here calm.
- In private.
You deal with it later.
Not at all, after what
you just said to me.
We are not any longer...
we are colleagues,
we are not friends
after how you
just acted to me.
Kyle.
Okay, that's tragic, but...
I actually have.
- Kyle, please.
- I don't care, Kyle.
Just ignore what she's saying,
block it out, and then say,
okay, you know what, cool.
I have no idea what this is
about, but fortunately enough,
in college, when people
got drunk, they fought.
I would try
to lessen the tension
- Nat, look, I'm not...
- Reid, keep it to yourself.
I think you guys just
need to hold your peace.
Tash, there's holding peace
and then there's ****.
You know what you need
to say to him.
- You don't speak...
- I'm not at work right now.
- But...
- It's happened in work.
I've spoken to...
It happened in work and you
were there, you...
- It's your role to say...
- I wasn't there.
You can't call someone a bitch,
that's your colleague.
I don't know what happened,
I'm sorry.
Oh, don't worry,
I'll tell you.
Tash, you're chief stew,
you're the chief stew.
If you want to, like this
not to happen out of work,
you should have handled
this within work hours.
All right, let's go.
She's got no balls whatsoever.
Hello, hello!
What up, Gs.
That's really cute.
Don't sit at the end.
We don't need gaps
in the table, Dave.
They don't want to sit
next to each other.
We've got two charters left.
I never have to see
Nat's face again,
she never has to see mine.
All three of you,
you're interior.
Like, everyone speak.
I don't want to
be affected in this.
You're the chief stew,
so you're affected in this,
because you haven't stood
up for me and said
when he called me bitch.
You are the chief stew.
You've not addressed
my colleague.
Guys, you're adults.
I'm not sticking up for anybody.
- Period, she hasn't.
- She hasn't
Guys, if you wanna talk,
argue it out between you both.
I don't need to...
No, Tash, you are
the chief stew.
What do you want me to say?
You called me a bitch within
work hours in front of the...
the captain heard it.
You called me a bitch...
It's got nothing to do with me.
You called me a bitch, so the...
Look at that.
I will...
Look at your attitude!
Look at your attitude.
That is the most tragic thing
I've ever seen in
my absolute life.
- Nat ****ing hell.
- Okay, well, I'm off.
Mzi, I found a McDonald's
for you.
I walked inside,
I ordered six cheeseburgers,
and they said,
"Sorry, we're closed."
Where is she?
Right now, what needs
to happen is...
- Is I go home?
- You go home... Yeah.
With Storm...
Storm, you're gonna
go home with Nat.
- No.
- Yes, you are.
I don't think she wants to.
No, Storm, shut the **** up,
you're gonna go home with Nat.
Sure.
Define "bitchy"
how you want to...
that's immature bitchy attitude.
I want to literally go and
put knives in Kyle's pillow.
I went on my hands and
knees to apologize to her.
She accepted it,
and you still wanna
attack me across the table.
Why don't we
stop talking about it
and talk about something else?
I'm really sorry how
everything's turned out.
The thing is, I'm glad
I got... I'm glad
said this from day one,
yes, I was angry at the table
before, obviously, but that's
angry because to be honest...
What's that?
I don't know,
I just put it in my bra.
- I was annoyed.
- You had every right to be.
You forgot to mention,
it's like,
you know how the situation
happens with, like...
Yes, of course.
I apologize.
Okay, guys, what
the **** is going on?
Well, of course, I have your
back more than anything.
This situation needs
to be resolved.
You know, like,
you're the chief stew.
At some point you have to have
a bit of professionalism and be,
like, right, Nat's not okay,
I'm gonna speak to her.
I just wanna deal with
this tomorrow.
Like, I'm not taking any sides.
You three need to have a chat.
Perfect.
Tomorrow morning, you three
need to have a chat.
I know we don't have
much to talk about,
but I don't wanna be in
the middle of that.
I've been ****ing
frustrated with Nat
and how things have been for us.
I don't wanna get hurt,
you know?
But to see her like this,
you know, I still...
I care about her.
I just wanna make sure
she's okay, yeah.
Mm-hmm.
Hey!
Lads and ladies, let's go.
- You'll be all right, Tash.
- Yeah.
There's only 10 days left.
I appreciate your support
when I've needed it.
Always. I'm always there.
Not just today, always.
What time is it,
is it midnight?
Tash.
What?
You're a very complicated
person, Tash.
I know, I'm sorry
I'm not a vibe.
I just want the truth,
that's all, nothing else.
I kind of probably should
give up at this point,
but I still think
there is a little bit of hope
with me and Tash.
I can't help it,
it's just the way I feel.
Huh?
Let's go.
Ah... oh!
No, come in, dude!
No, he's in a bad mood.
What up, D-Money?
Oh, yeah.
It was just a bad
argument tonight.
Period.
Ah, thank you, my friend.
Ooh.
sh** day and
a sh** night.
Going to bed now.
Okay, good night.
Night-night.
How was your night?
Yeah, I don't know,
it was fine.
Coming up...
Are you sure this is safe?
Yeah, yeah, you'll be fine.
Honestly, I've never
been in a tender
with swells this bad before.
- ...Ing gnarly.
- Whoa.
Oh! Oh!
I just feel like
I have no need
to even bother
going out next time.
Oh, my God.
Um, ****
I was like, you all
need to ****ing speak.
Yeah.
This wind is making
things difficult.
Ooh.
Jesus, I'm drunk.
The wind is terrible.
I do want Dave to realize
that there are boundaries,
and that there is this line
that he cannot cross.
Like, I don't wanna
go back into that whole mess
that we were in before.
Oh sh**
I've got enough on
my plate right now.
That's the last thing I want.
**** it.
I've done the swim platform
on main deck.
I'm just gonna go around with
a chamois on the railings,
because they're all sal-tay.
It's gonna be, like, over
30 knots of wind in here.
The swells are massive,
what a bummer.
David, Natasha, Storm,
meet me in the crew mess
for a preference sheet meeting.
Copy.
Okay.
Charter number eight, and
we're all still together.
Hell, yeah.
Strong team.
Garold and Catherine Miller
are no strangers to luxury boats
and have their own
58-foot sailing yacht.
They are looking forward to
celebrating
their 25th wedding anniversary
and having the crew tend
to their every need.
Lila, their youngest daughter,
is a yacht broker,
and she's looking forward
to celebrating
her 21st birthday on board.
What are you gonna do?
Well, when they arrive
I'm gonna smash out some sushi.
Then for their
25th anniversary celebration,
so, a Spanish theme, yeah,
we can either go tapas
or we can just do
a big paella.
Great idea.
The Millers spend their summers
jet-skiing, snorkeling,
so they want all water toys
out all the time.
Too bad, it doesn't look like
we're gonna get off the dock.
sh**
We have a major weather
system coming in.
This is not gonna change.
There is no way I'll be able
to get off the dock,
because it'll be
so rough out there
there's no protection
in this weather.
The pressure's on, huh?
- Thank you.
- Thank you.
So, port side
hasn't been washed?
- Yeah, it has.
- It has?
Yeah, I'm just washing
the windows now.
It just needs drying.
Okay.
- Good morning.
- Hi.
Yeah.
Well, okay.
So, this is the meeting I would
have liked to have yesterday,
but it actually
ended up happening out.
Someone gets alcohol
into their system,
it just gets heightened
and raged.
There was no need
to all be shouting.
That was just...
for me, the push-over was
that cabin yesterday.
Then it wasn't just a situation
where you called me a bitch,
it was a situation where you
actually apparently got really
hotheaded to the point
that Captain Sandy
actually stepped in,
which I've heard,
and said that's not appropriate.
I agree that situation did
happen, but I came down to you,
and I feel like I was wrong,
and that's 100 percent
what I took on me.
I appreciate that apology,
but then you went ahead
and called me
a bitch again last night.
So, you've just done it again,
so that apology
means nothing to me.
Last night, in an out-of-work
zone, you called me a bitch now
within my... which isn't a funny.
You've then called me a bitch
at the table...
And I called you that, and
I also said that to your face.
Exactly, you said it
at the dinner table
in front of the crew.
It was not appropriate,
and you last night...
And you attacking me
in front of the crew
or in that time
is appropriate?
- You're the...
- You're talking about
Tash being professional,
you're talking about me
being professional...
get your sh** together and
you start acting professional.
I said... see, look how
aggressive you're getting.
Look how aggressive
your approach is, sis.
When that voice comes out,
that is exactly...
Look at your voice.
- Kyle?
- Yeah.
The difference here is that
I say stuff to people's face,
not behind their back.
And if you wanna go
down that trail...
- And I said everything...
- I will take that.
I disagree with this,
because I have heard
that I was called a bad manager,
I can't manage my time,
I'm unapproachable...
I've never said you were
unapproachable.
And these are all the things
that were said behind my back.
Things get said about people
in heat of the moment,
and I understand that,
because clearly,
everyone said something.
I think maybe going forward, if
you feel like there's something
that's upsetting you
or needs to change,
then I think we just
speak about it first.
Stop arguments later down
the line of us getting stressed,
and I think we just try
to make things better.
Okay, I agree with that.
Nat, I'm not blowing
smoke in your ass,
I'm saying facts is facts.
Work-wise, you're outstanding.
I am genuinely apologetic
for the use of the words.
I have no excuse but complete
exhaustion,
and sorry, I just...
Can we just stop bitching now,
because we...
I naturally defend myself.
I grew up having to be that.
I was bullied immensely in
high school
and primary school,
thrown in bins.
That was a very
tough time for me.
With Nat, I haven't
been thinking
where she's coming from.
It doesn't feel right.
Okay, new rule...
no one talk sh** about
each other because I'm happy...
I wouldn't say... like I love us
talking sh** about other people.
- Yeah.
- Maybe not interior.
Let's not change
too many things now.
- We're all good in here!
- We're fine.
Coming up...
There's no chance.
I thought there was.
I just wanna run away.
The weather looks ****ing sh**
Oh, wow, it's coming off
beautifully.
Towels, towels.
Towels, towels, more towels.
Yeah, I think I need a coffee
and I'm gonna grab
a doughnut, too.
Did you...
are you having a coffee, Kyle?
Yeah, I'm making coffees.
That's all right,
I can just...
Sorry?
I'll make it.
What?
All crew, all crew,
we have provisions.
All crew, we have provisions
on the dock.
Copy.
When did the golf balls arrive?
Very light, this is going
to be party decorations
for the next two days.
All crew, all crew, meet
in the main salon in your whites
at 11:55 for a 12:00 arrival.
Copy for interior.
Oh, my God, it's just...
I don't know what
this knot's from.
Ow!
I'm hungry.
Crew mess looks good.
The guests are actually
walking up to us right now.
- We are coming home.
- It's a sick boat.
All crew to the dock, please,
all crew to the dock
for guest arrival.
- Oh, it's...
- It's beautiful.
Yeah, I love it.
Oh, I'm so excited.
Oh, and there's our crew.
- Hi, guys.
- Hi!
- Hey!
- Hello!
Oh, my God, it's so elegant.
- Hi, I'm Garold.
- Nice to meet you.
- Pleasure to meet you.
- Hi, I'm Natasha.
Lila, nice to meet you.
Oh, I wore my boating shoes, so
I can just slip 'em right off.
Dad's got the Guccis on.
- Welcome aboard...
- Thank you.
Your Home away from home.
- Yeah.
- Okay.
Our chief stew is gonna
show you around.
Great.
And then I'm gonna come chat
to you about the weather.
- Okay.
- All right.
Okay.
The good weather, right,
it's beautiful.
Oh, God.
- Yeah, at least it's sunny.
- It's so sunny.
I don't know if it's the...
we're not leaving
the dock today,
but I'll tell you about
it in there.
- Okay.
- Oh, my God.
Perfect tanning weather.
They see sunny skies, and
right now the wind's not bad.
However, on the outside
of this port it's really bad,
and wind brings waves, period.
There are big waves.
I'm literally gonna cry.
- That's a bummer.
- What's that?
That we're not
leaving the dock.
Yeah, I mean, it is a bummer,
can you believe it?
All right, thank you.
- Here we go, cheers.
- Thank you.
Cheers, Li.
Kinda look like a
'90s porn star right now.
- Me?
- Yeah, you do, very much.
- Moustache and glasses.
- It's the yellow lenses, yeah.
Yeah.
You're taking us on the tour?
Yes, I am, is everyone ready?
- Yes.
- Of course.
Ooh, this is so pretty.
Wow.
Oh, so, yeah,
here's our lunch table.
Gorgeous.
It's ridiculous, isn't it?
So, this seems like
the party place, up here.
- This is the party pad.
- This is the party pad.
This is where we
gotta have my birthday.
Yeah, we kinda heat this up
because it's a bit cold.
I'll make it hotter
when I get in.
Oh, wow.
Yeah.
Is this all of it?
Yeah.
Lunch will be served
in 10 minutes,
so you've gotta hurry up.
All right, we'll hurry up.
We'll speed up.
Don't be shellfish.
Is there a certain time you
might like to have lunch?
Do we wanna finish with
the tour, freshen up,
maybe get settled a little,
and then have lunch?
Yeah.
- So, should we say, like, 1:30?
- 1:00?
Let's say 1:00.
What's the beam throughout here?
Like, this feels kinda,
like, short, almost.
Do you... you mean, like,
it's quite small?
The width.
Yeah, like, the beam
of this room.
Oh, I can find out for
you if you like.
- Yeah?
- Yeah, sure.
I'm curious.
I've had a charter broker
as a guest before,
and it was actually a nightmare.
He tested us.
He went around the boat
and he did things
to check that we'd checked.
He stuck, like, a piece
of chewing gum behind an apple
in a fruit bowl to check that we
were checking the fruit bowls.
What year is this boat,
do you remember, 2018?
It's 2016, '17.
Dave, Dave, Tasha.
They would like lunch at 1:00.
Hi.
Hi, I wanted to say hi.
- Since you're a boater...
- Yeah.
I was gonna come
talk to you guys.
- So, this is what we're...
- Working with?
Yeah, it's terrible.
Oh, gosh.
Yeah, so this is the wave,
so see this?
- Oh, my God.
- This is meters.
- Yeah.
- So, it's crazy.
It's bad.
Right now, we'd be...
it would be dangerous to leave.
Yeah.
What do you think tomorrow?
Well, we can't leave the dock.
Tomorrow, we look
at the weather.
Yeah, we'll just cross
our fingers.
The minute it lays down,
I'll take off.
Yeah. Okay.
Dave?
1:00 for lunch?
- Davey?
- Yeah.
Thirty minutes to lunch.
Thirty minutes?
- They want it at 1:00?
- Yeah, 30 minutes to lunch.
They want it at...
Where's my parents?
Oh, here they are.
I need a drink.
What's that?
How am I being rude?
I just, I... I... it's not
my fault we're out of mint.
You've been rude to me
all morning, Dave.
Sorry, how have
I been rude to you?
I haven't said anything.
I'm just getting
on with my job.
Exactly, that's the thing.
Well, then...
You won't communicate
with me.
All right.
The wind here,
but this is the waves.
Yeah.
It's deceiving, because
you can't see the swell.
Do you want me to find a bay
that we can go
and put you in the water
with some of the toys?
Duck out with the tender,
check it out.
All right, Courts and I are
gonna go and have a look, okay?
Yeah.
I wanna go, like,
swimming or something.
I wanna go do something, yeah.
Look at how cute Mom looks.
See if she'll marry me
another 25 years.
We're gonna go to the other
side of the marina
to go see if it's accessible for
us to actually get in the water.
Yeah.
Will you tie my top a
little tighter, actually?
Mom.
Thanks, mate.
Okay. You can go, Courts.
See, look at the horizon,
it's ****ing gnarly.
Yeah, man.
**** me.
You sure this is safe?
Yeah, yeah, you'll be fine.
Okay, punch it,
straight up the middle.
**** me, like, honestly,
I've never been in a tender
with swells this bad before.
Whoa.
All I can see is these
massive ****ing waves,
like, holy ****.
No.
Yeah.
- I'm hungry.
- This is so awesome.
Okay, they're having
a seat now.
We're gonna start
with the bread.
Okay, great.
Thank you.
- You're welcome.
- Good job.
My stomach's going.
I took Courtney to where we
usually do our water sports...
huge swells.
Not safe for the guests at all.
Okay, so you went through...
We went through the bridge,
we went to the opposite side,
and it's not safe.
Honestly, the whole boat
was like this at one point,
and like this.
- Hectic.
- Yeah.
So, definitely
not going out now.
Shall I take them to, like,
a museum or something?
Just phone Rico and ask him
can they organize
a tour guide and some cars?
Yeah, okay, good.
I'm glad you checked it
out without the guests.
- All right, cool, thanks.
- Yeah, me too.
That's always good.
It's just bad timing, and
especially for this charter,
they're super active.
All they wanna do
is water sports.
We need to think of something
or we're totally screwed.
Sake, sake, sake,
boom, boom, boom.
And then you chug it.
Oh, yeah, get it!
So proud, oh!
So proud of my girls.
Hey, dude, the ocean's
too dangerous
for me to take them on.
It's terrible out there.
Is there any way that
we can take them
on a guided tour today?
I know it's pretty late notice.
We recently went to some sort of
fort and restaurants and stuff.
Is that something we
could potentially do?
Let me know, thanks.
Ooh, what are these?
Prawn, avocado,
and spicy salmon.
Oh, my God,
this looks beautiful.
Thank you, what about the food?
Ah, this is the life.
I'm trying to think
about what's next.
Yeah, right?
At 3:30, we need them
on the swim platform.
We're taking them
to the cannons,
and at least we can get them off
the boat for, like, two hours.
Thank God.
Wow, you polished off
those wontons, huh?
She might have been worried
that you were gonna take them.
I think she was.
- Nat?
- Hi, girl.
Kyle, you can do the cabins,
turning them over.
You can go on a break.
Copy.
I'm, like, stuffed.
I wanna walk around
the boat a little.
Let's go.
I'm gonna trip on this thing.
Kyle, Nat's gonna head
on her break now.
Well, where is everyone?
I wanna ****ing be underway
and sit in those
...ing superhero chairs.
Hey, guys, we've organized for
a private tour to this...
every afternoon at 12:00 and
at 4:00 they set off cannons.
Okay.
So, basically, in half an hour,
if you could make your way
to the stern, to the back
of the boat,
we're gonna put you in
a bunch of cars,
and then set the cannons
of for you guys.
- Oh, up there?
- Yeah.
- All right?
- Yeah.
Hey Courts, will you get
changed into your polo?
Yeah.
You, Mzi, and Reid are
gonna go with them.
Okay, cool.
You guys are leaving in 15
minutes, okay?
Okay, sweet,
I'll go get changed.
Ready, Lila Rose?
Yes.
Back into my schoolboy outfit.
Yeah, hello, hello.
- Hey, little buddy!
- Hey, little buddy!
All right, I have
my phone, right?
That's the most important thing,
to take pictures.
I don't, but I don't need it.
You may call me
a 12-year-old boy, but...
- Hi.
- Hi.
All right, enjoy, guys.
Have a good time, yeah?
- Yeah, kids in one?
- Yeah.
Let's go shoot some cannons!
Hey.
Why didn't you come in earlier,
I've been waiting.
Because I thought you
were having a snooze.
Yeah, but I was waiting for you.
What exactly is
going on right now?
We're going to a tower.
We're going to a tower,
because they let of cannons.
Basically, these big cannons
go off every day.
Have a cuddle, couple of kisses,
and you fell asleep with me.
You guys, you think we're gonna
get off the dock tomorrow?
I think we should
get off tomorrow.
Awesome.
I hope we're able
to get off the dock.
This is our last
few days together.
Yeah.
Storm's really in
the good books at the moment.
You know, I've been a little
stressed lately with, like,
what's going on with,
like, the interior,
so it's nice to have him,
like, around to, like, cuddle.
It makes me happy to see him.
Don't tell him I said that.
Whoa.
Oh, my God!
Hey, guys, we're
gonna go this way.
We're off to see some cannons.
Okay, are we good,
have we got everyone?
All right, we have seven
minutes still, we're okay.
Go, go, and we'll get you some
drinks, ready for the cannons.
Oh, what can I get you to drink?
What do you have?
Prosecco, wine,
beers, champagne.
- Rosé.
- Rosé?
This is amazing.
That's beautiful.
In that corner, you know,
see where the red boat...
- Yeah.
- The big red ships are?
To the right of them
in that little bay there,
that's where we wanna take you
to do water sports tomorrow.
Okay.
If we can't leave the dock,
then we'll head over there.
And it looks protected,
at least.
If the weather's okay, are we
gonna go out into the open?
Yeah, so, Captain Sandy wants
to obviously
take the boat out
as soon as we can.
So, if the swell gets
a bit better, we will.
It's really hard to keep guests
entertained for, like,
a full ****ing day,
like, 12 hours.
They're all sailors,
they're all in yachting.
Like, yeah, it's not
a great situation.
I think the cannon's
about to go.
Evening gun, fire!
- ****
- Oh!
****
Coming up...
Do you guys not think
dinner's taking a long time?
You can speak up, but...
- Well...
- Just pace yourself, it's fine.
But, like, really.
Are these ready to go?
There are too many
people hanging around.
Yeah.
What's going on out here?
We're going Spanish theme.
They want the theme
to match the food.
Is today the anniversary?
Yeah, can you believe
they've been together 25 years?
They don't look old
enough for that.
Oh, my God, are you playing
with your balls again, honey?
- Yeah.
- Hope you enjoyed that.
- We loved it!
- Yes, that was very cool.
So, if you want to ask
any questions,
we just move near
the guns there,
and I will give you
any answers you like.
Okay.
So, do we think that tomorrow
we're gonna get off the dock?
Right here.
Thanks, hon.
Have we go that Mad Hatter's
cake stand somewhere?
Yeah, it's in the bilge.
I'll pull it out now.
Apparently we're gonna use it
for dinner tonight on the table.
Oh, okay.
Talk to me,
what's the dinner plan?
It's paella.
No.
sh**
So, I need massive spot
on the table?
Set it up inside, then.
- Okay.
- How many starters?
I'm kind of just doing
as many as I can.
- Are you okay?
- Not really.
I'm just having a hard time
processing it.
There's no chance.
I thought there was.
But it's so dumb,
it's stupid.
Like, I just wanna run away.
- Come on, David.
- ...Ing hell.
Guys, that was awesome.
Thanks, Dad!
Yeah, yeah, yeah,
beep, beep.
Dave seems like a bit
in a mood, doesn't he?
Oh, he's not even
talking to me at all?
Why, what has happened?
Not even a word.
He's been messaging me,
so I told him to stop.
Oh, you ****.
- Right.
- Silly things, it's just...
Yeah.
Well, hang in there.
You're doing so good
to maintain.
The guests are here.
Are you able to come down
and greet
with these sangrias
that I've made?
- Yeah.
- Welcome back.
Thank you.
Hi, guys, welcome back.
- How are you?
- Hi.
How was that?
Can I take it from you?
Yes, please, thank you.
More drinks?
Sangria.
You'll probably have time
to, like, freshen up,
and if you wanna change.
I'm thinking, like,
dinner at 8:00?
- I mean, I don't know.
- Dinner at 8:30...
Well, yeah, 8:00, 8:30?
Perfect.
Ah.
We look good, baby.
I feel like
I'm, like, a housewife.
I'm about to bake
you a cherry pie.
I want you to
pop my cherry pie.
Look at you.
Hey, you're looking
a little crazy!
So, tensions are high.
What?
Like, I went down to the galley,
and he's being
so short with her.
Ing hell.
Deck crew, deck crew,
we're gonna have to all help
interior however we can.
Say!
Do you want any help,
you want me to wash up?
- No, I'm good, mate.
- Okay, no worries.
No, yeah, all good.
Hi.
Wow, this is awesome.
Who did that?
- Tash.
- It was a magician.
- No, Tash did the roses.
- Beautiful.
Considering we're on the dock,
the crew are pulling
out every stop.
The table setting, the themes,
the courses that David
has to make to keep up.
That's a lot of pressure
on the chef.
They're all, like, committed
to this, which I'm really happy,
to try to keep
the guests happy.
How clever is that?
Okay, Dave, what do
you need for cutlery?
Just need, like, ramekins
and stuff, do you know?
Little dishes just
to put this stuff in.
Oh, my God, that's so cool.
Mom, look what they
did for you guys.
Oh my God,
I love that, it's so pretty.
Yeah, well, let's eat.
- Did you see them on...
- I'm starving, Mom.
I'm so sorry you're so hungry.
- I think we're...
- Are you so hungry?
We have to wait a moment,
though.
When are we eating, at 8:30?
Hey, happy anniversary.
Thanks, honey.
I love you.
I love you, too.
Don't fill up to
the top, top, top.
So, we've got rye
and cacao bread.
Okay, rye and cacao.
What can I use for this,
can I use this?
I don't know, man,
you have to...
- that's not my...
- Okay.
**** it, I don't know.
sh**, he's in a mood,
and not good at all.
Thank you, fantastic, yeah.
Ladies and gentlemen,
I'm sorry to disturb you.
Obviously, there's no rush,
but to let you know,
we're ready for service when
you are at the top, yeah.
- Oh, great.
- Awesome.
Let's go.
Yeah, come hang.
- This is beautiful.
- This looks so great.
The wines will roll out shortly,
but we'll start with
the waters, all right?
Let's get this going.
Awesome.
Would you like sparkling
or still water?
Sparkling, please.
Okay, Davey, guests are
at the table,
they've started with the breads,
we're filling in waters now,
all right?
Okay, mate.
Oh, my God, what are you making?
It's called a leg-spreader.
- Oh, my God.
- I'm just making it up.
Tash is busy with cocktails,
so I will be here.
Okay.
Do you mind if I start with
these while...
You can go, yeah,
you can do as you want, man.
He said that was rye bread
with cacao, the dark one.
With what?
- Cacao, chocolate.
- Rye with cacao chocolate.
Oh. Sorry, I thought
you said "with cow."
- Yeah, with cow.
- No, cacao.
Well, for you it's cow.
Are these ready to go?
Ing ****.
We have the
Spanish tortilla.
Here, we have cod.
Shall I get a tray for this?
Yeah, all right, mate.
Can you take one of
these trays, please?
- Yes.
- And...
Hello.
- Ooh!
- Hola!
There are too many people
hanging around.
Yeah.
Too many people
asking questions.
Random plastic bag,
may look like rubbish**
they use this for stuff.
So, pop that in here.
These underwear...
dirty, don't touch them.
- Which would you like?
- What is it again?
- This is cod.
- Yeah?
In flour batter,
and then we have
mentega over there.
Yeah, I'll pass.
Thank you.
No worries.
You're welcome.
I don't know what
I've been told...
where do these plates go?
If this has been used,
throw it away?
It's not been used,
it's a shower cap.
- It's a shower?
- Cap.
Oh, for the head.
So, what's coming next?
Chicken and prawn paella.
There you go.
Dave, just to let you know,
we're clearing now.
- You're clearing now, okay.
- Ready for the paella.
Okay.
Food.
So, we're gonna put
the paella out,
we'll go round the table,
all round the table with it.
Oh, I thought we were gonna just
come and present it and be,
like, here's your chicken...
Yeah, so, all round the table,
exactly,
and then we go back
to the top bar...
To the bar, yeah.
And then we serve it on the...
you'll ask if they
want chicken or prawn.
Then we'll serve it and then
we'll dish it out to them, yeah?
Yeah.
Okay.
It's unprofessional that
Dave's trying to give me
the cold shoulder just
from trying to set
a boundary towards him.
Our job is communicating,
especially with these guests.
- Is it clear?
- It's clear now.
- So, are we ready to start?
- Yeah.
- See what I'm doing here?
- Yeah.
We're diamonding it off to say
"We've been here, we've
touched your toilet paper."
Do you guys not think
dinner's taking a long time?
You can speak up, like...
- Well, it's...
- Just pace yourself, it's fine.
- Like, relax, enjoy.
- But, like, really...
Oh, they're bringing sangria...
uh-oh.
- Okay, we'll ask him.
- What's taking a while...
yeah, it's taking a
little while.
No, Dad, at any restaurant,
we'd be, like, what
the hell's going on.
No, it's fine.
Primary's daughter
was saying, like,
"If this was a restaurant,
he'd be complaining."
Really?
Yeah, so why isn't
he complaining now.
Primary's daughter,
Lila, they're not stoked.
We're gonna go to the restroom.
I'm just annoyed,
and at this point it's
just, like, embarrassing.
The service is supposed
to be seven-star service.
It's been slow as ****
all night,
What?
Why?
And the next course, how long...
- when is that gonna be ready?
- Yes.
I'll go check in the galley.
So, tomorrow, off the dock,
or what do we think
about tomorrow?
Positive thoughts
we're getting off the dock,
and we're gonna be going
down that slide tomorrow.
Hopefully.
If you're going on that slide,
you better have one.
I have special clothes for that.
Everything's strapped in.
There'll be, like, duct tape.
Okay, so three chicken...
Sorry?
It seems like there's
some major tension
between David and Natasha,
and I'm not sure why.
So, I'm going to keep my eye on
them so they stay at that level.
So, here's the one with both.
Oh, that's delicious-looking.
Oh, thank you.
Tell me what you want as
we go, and then...
Three shrimp, I think I said...
did I say?
And two chicken.
My rice is crispy.
Dad, you probably
shouldn't eat that,
I don't think it's that good.
I don't think it's
seven-star amazing.
I think it's good, I just
don't think it's, like, wow.
It's just, like, different.
It's not, like, what you're
used to, I feel like.
What?
I'm not gonna say
sh** now, yeah.
I feel like telling Dave
about this paella right now
is not gonna help any situation,
because to make a new paella
would take around 45 minutes.
And these guests clearly
do not wanna wait
any longer for any more food.
Sorry, it's just,
like, oh, my God.
It's not the best thing
he's made us yet.
Yeah, no.
Can I take anything else,
Dave, or is it all up there now?
- That's it for now.
- Okay.
They're eating away, yeah?
Yeah, they're all happy,
thanks, Dave.
All right, good night,
everybody.
Thank you guys so
much for dinner.
- Bye!
- Thank you so much.
- Good night!
- Keep it separated, guys.
Wait, Isaac, remember, boys in
the bunk and girls in the room.
You go to your room, and...
Ai-yi-yi.
Just keep the buns
in the bread aisle.
What time do you
want me to go down?
You guys...
you can go down now.
Okay, they're going down.
Dinner was amazing.
Kind of.
Oh, she's literally gorgeous.
You're so in love.
Are you kidding me?
You're in love.
Am I allowed to appreciate the
fact that somebody's really hot?
- Yeah.
- She's very hot.
Happy anniversary.
I love you.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do,
and if you do,
- name it after me, okay?
- Nope.
Whew, what a night.
- Good night.
- Okay, sweet dreams.
Good night.
You're going to bed?
See you in the morning.
Is there talk of us going
off the dock tomorrow?
I don't think anyone knows,
to be honest.
Can't see it happening, but...
See you later, tip.
Yeah.
All right, see you
in the morning.
All right, thank you.
Oh! Oh!
What was that?
- Nat!
- What just happened?
- Oh!
- Kyle!
Oh sh**
- Oh!
- Kyle has fallen.
Ah, oh.