Austin & Ally (2011–2016): Season 3, Episode 4 - Beach Clubs & BFFs - full transcript

- David Coleman.
- Katniss Everdeen

- Ah!
- Home sweet home.

Being on tour was amazing, but how
good does it feel to get off that bus?

Surprise!

- Welcome back!
- Thanks, dad.

Uh, why does that sign
say "happy anniversary"?

Oh, I found it in
the supply closet.

Why spend money on new decorations
when it's the thought that counts?

I guess that explains the
rotten jack-o'-lantern.

Huh. Yeah.

I missed you, Sweetie.



Oh, I missed you too, Mr.
Dawson.

I missed everything
in this place.

I missed this cash register.
I missed this trumpet.

I missed this random customer.

You're back!

Oh, it's so good to see you.

You too.

Put your arms down, buddy.
You're embarrassing yourself.

Thanks so much for covering
for me while I was gone.

Oh, sure, no problem. Working
with your dad was a blast.

Oh. Well, thank you, Kira.

Honestly... this was the
longest month of my life.

Anyway, we have so
much to catch up on!

Yeah, you wanna hear
all about my tour?



I was talking to Ally.

Okay, now you're starting
to embarrass me.

Did you get all my postcards?

Whoa. Since when are
you two a thing?

Oh, we hung out a little before
I met up with you guys on tour.

Turns out we have
a lot in common.

I can think of one thing
you have in common.

I'm talking about you, Austin.

- Because you dated both Ally and K...
- I get it.

Oh, hey, you guys wanna go to
the new beach club tomorrow?

It's where the old Humpy's
Burger Bar used to be.

- Yeah, sure.
- Sweet!

I could use a new hang. I'm
sick of this place already.

I'm sick of this cash register.
I'm sick of that trumpet.

I'm sick of this customer.

Sorry, pal, the spark's
just not there anymore.

♪ When the crowd wants more,
I bring on the thunder.

♪ 'Cause you've got my back,
and I'm not going under.

♪ You're my point,
you're my guard.

♪ You're the perfect chord.

♪ And I see our names
together on every billboard.

♪ We're headed for the
top, we've got it on lock.

♪ We'll make 'em say "hey!"

♪ And we'll keep rockin'.

♪ Oh, there's no way I
could make it without ya.

♪ Do it without ya,
be here without ya.

♪ It's no fun when
you're doing it solo.

♪ With you it's like, "whoa".
Yeah, and I know.

♪ I own this dream.

♪ 'Cause I got you with me.

♪ There's no way I could
make it without ya.

♪ Do it without ya,
be here without ya.

Whoa! This place is awesome!

I'm gonna dominate on
those volleyball courts.

And the cabanas will provide ample
protection against harmful U.V.A. rays!

Yup, there's something
for everybody.

Not to mention all
those fine honeys.

Figures. I bring you to a beautiful beach
club and all you notice are the girls?

Girls? I was talking
about the fine selection

of honeys they have over
at the iced tea bar.

Mm-mmm!

Where did Trish go?

- She'd love all this stuff.
- Hmm.

Guess who got a job at
Shredders Beach Club!

Really? We've been
here for two minutes.

How did you get a job that fast?

It's kinda my thing.

You should see how
fast she loses jobs.

Plus, Ally, did you
see that stage?

Now that I work here, I'm
gonna try to book you a gig.

That's a great idea!

The grand opening party is Saturday night.
Maybe I can play that.

Oh, totally. And it's
gonna be a luau.

I love luaus...

The music, the
food, the clothes.

Did you know tropical print is my
favorite after cheetah and leopard?

Yes, I've seen your closet.

Looks like a zoo
exploded in there.

Let's hit the beach, Dez.

This six-pack needs some sun.

Yup.

I got a one-pack that
could use some sun too.

So, Ally, you never told
me what happened on tour.

What's going on with
you and Austin?

We had fun hanging out, but with
everything going on with our music...

We thought it was best to just
stay friends for right now.

I get it. You're focused
on your career.

I'm focused on mine.

Welcome to Shredders!

I'm Hazel, the manager.

Is there anything I can do to
make you guests more comfortable?

Aren't you sweet!

- Maybe some water.
- Oh! I don't mean you, silly.

You work here. Oh! Here
is your official sponge.

I'm sure you can find
something to wipe.

Just that smile off her face.

Sorry, Ally, looks like we can't
hang today like we planned.

- That's okay. I've got Kira.
- Hmm.

- Oh, wait, Trish.
- I know, I know.

I want to hang with
you guys, too.

No, I was wondering if you could
set up some beach chairs for us.

Oh. I'll get right on that.

Um, hey, Kira. I
love your swimsuit.

Thanks, it's...

Oh my gosh!

♪ Twinsies!

♪ Barfsies.

Hey, nice castle.

It's not a castle.

It's a Yorkshire country manor
with adjoining stables.

Yeah, that... that
was my second guess.

Man, I missed the beach
while we were on tour.

Oh, me too.

The sun, the sand,
the treasure map.

Did you just say,
"treasure map"?

Did I just say, "treasure map"?!

Whoa.

Austin, look...

A giant palm tree, a black rock.

This map is leading to treasure
right here on the beach.

Come on.

You don't really think there's treasure
buried at the beach club, do you?

This wasn't always a beach club.

Remember what Mrs. Daniels
said in history class?

"Wake up, Austin.
You're snoring again"?

I mean before that.

She said that 400 years ago,

Ponce De Leon docked his ships
full of gold along this coastline.

And then pirate Gasparilla
stole the treasure

and buried it under
this very sand.

Really? And you
believe all that?

Trust me, there's booty
all over this beach.

You said, "booty".

- Oh.
- Excuse me, coming through.

Trish, you are never
gonna believe this.

Ally and I are taking a friendship
quiz and getting all the same answers.

Watch. "You're
planning a vacation".

"Do you, A; Jet-set to Tahiti or,
B; Go ice-fishing in Minnesota?"

Uh, "A".

Me too.

♪ Twinsies!

I'm sure everyone's
compatible on those quizzes.

- Oh, you try, Trish.
- Okay.

"You're going on a
date with your crush.

Do you, A; Go to the movies
or, B; Chat over fro-yo?"

Easy... "A".

Movies make the
best first dates.

You don't have to hear the
guy yapping about himself.

I like getting to know the guy.
I pick "B".

- Me too!
- Don't say it.

♪ Twinsies!

Oh, Ally and I are alike too.

We're always finishing
each other's...

Sentences.

Oh! Kira, did I ever tell you about
the time Trish and I went to the...

- Fair.
- Actually, I was gonna say the...

- Water Park.
- Art museum.

And then Trish fell asleep
during a lecture on...

Oil paintings? Stenciling?

- Renaissance architecture?
- Exactly!

Wow! It's like you can
read my thoughts!

Just be glad you
can't read mine.

Cans...

Frying pan...

Golf club...

More cans...

First aid kit.

Don't just throw that away!

That could save someone's life.

A nine iron can be a lifesaver
when you're close to the green.

Hey, have you guys
seen Ally anywhere?

I think she went
swimming with Kira.

Oh. Those two sure are connected
at the hip today, huh?

Being all cutesy, and B.F.F.-ey, and some
might even say unbearably obnoxious.

I think it's a-dorable.

Yeah, they're like... Twinsies.

Okay, the next person who says
"Twinsies" is going to get hurtsies.

Oh, I see what's going on here.

Someone's jealous.

Wha-a-a-a-at?

Look, you're Ally's B.F.F. and
the one who books her gigs.

No one can replace you.

Hey, guys!

I just booked Ally a gig
here at the beach club!

I guess you can be replaced.

I'm so excited I get to sing at the
beach club luau tomorrow night.

Maybe if it goes well, I can
get a regular gig there.

Oh, it'll be great. We're
gonna have so much fun!

Yeah, you guys are.

I have to work.

Trish, I hope you're
cool with this.

I know you were trying to get Ally
a gig at the beach club and...

The last thing I want to
do is step on your toes.

- Oh!
- Ow!

Sorry! Catch you guys later.

Do not ask us what we're doing
with all this digging equipment.

It is top secret.

Okay, fine. We're searching
for buried treasure!

But do not ask us how
we know where to look.

Okay, fine. We found a treasure
map, but do not ask us...

Dez, no one cares.

I care, buddy. I care.

You have to help me pick
out what to wear tomorrow.

Oh, why don't you just wear
whatever Kira's wearing?

You guys seem to have
everything else in common.

Okay, I didn't want to
say anything before,

but you've been acting
kinda jealous lately.

Well, maybe I am a
little jealous.

You're spending so much time
with Kira and I barely see you.

That's just because you've
been working so hard.

It's not my fault I
haven't gotten fired yet!

Seriously, you have no
reason to be jealous.

You're my best friend.

No one could ever
fill your shoes.

- I know.
- Good.

Oh! By the way, can
Kira borrow your shoes?

Your strappy sandals are
gonna go great with

the dress she's gonna
wear to the luau.

I'm exhausted.

We've been digging for hours
and we haven't made a dent.

Must be something wrong
with our shovels.

Try the metal detector again.

Great Gasparilla's ghost. I
think we found something!

Yes!

Another metal detector.

Woo!

Great! Now we can find
nothing twice as fast.

Aloha, and welcome to
paradise by the sea.

Your evening of Polynesian
enchantment awaits.

Here's your complimentary lei.

Please enjoy the
all-you-can-eat seafood bar.

Question; Is that all I can eat
now or all I can eat ever?

Because I brought a to-go bag.

Okay.

How's your stupid
treasure hunt going?

Not good. I'm exhausted.

It'll all be worth it when we get our
hands on that sweet sweet booty.

There's gotta be a better
way to phrase that.

And what's with your feet?

Oh, these? Thanks for noticing.

I've rigged metal detectors
to the bottom of our shoes

so we can schmooze and treasure
hunt at the same time.

♪ Trish!

Great news...
you're on pig duty.

Don't forget... the
first rule of the pork;

If you want great
taste, you gotta baste.

If I'm ever that
happy, just smack me.

Oh! Aloha, welcome.

- Complimentary lei?
- Aw, thanks, Trish.

- Mmm.
- I'm gonna go grab a front-row seat.

Break a leg.

Hey, Trish, do you mind telling
the Stage Manager I'm here?

Oh, are you sure you wouldn't
rather have your new B.F.F.,

and manager, and
personal stylist do it?

Trish, we talked about this. There's
no reason for you to be jealous.

Well, I am. I am sick of the Twinsies stuff
and I'm sick of waiting on you guys.

I have more dignity than that.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have
a giant pig to keep moist.

Dez! These stupid shoes
are picking up something!

Oh, false alarm.

It's just a shrimp fork.

Stop! You're ruining my luau!

Well, your luau is on the
site of some very valuable...

Buried treasure.

What are you talking about?

Show her the map, Dez.

Read it and weep.

An authentic treasure map
from pirate Gasparilla.

This is a children's menu
from Humpy's Burger Bar...

The restaurant that
used to be here.

I find these all over the place.

What?!

But how do you explain the bloodstain
and the giant "X" marking the treasure?

That blood is ketchup and the "X" is
a half-finished tic-tac-toe game.

Aloha, everybody.
I'm Ally Dawson.

Welcome to Shredders'
grand opening!

Woo!

Let's get this luau started.

Whoa, Trish!

Second rule of pork;

If you don't want it to burn,
speed up the turn. Woo!

Honey, are you okay?

She's trying to say something.

- Get this thing off me!
- Oh. We're on it.

Ally, I'm so sorry!

I can't believe you
ruined my performance!

- You did this on purpose!
- What?! Why would I do that?

You've been jealous this whole time and
now you're trying to get back at me!

You're supposed to
be my best friend!

I can't believe you'd
blame me for this!

If you really think I'd stoop that low,
then maybe we're not best friends!

Maybe we're not!

Uh, why were all those
dogs chasing us?

Maybe because I
smell like bacon?

Yeah, I wasn't going to say anything,
but you do smell really good.

Thanks?

I can't believe Trish would humiliate
me in front of all those people.

Maybe she didn't do it.

Yeah, I'm sure that pig just
flew through the air by itself.

You think? Because my
algebra teacher said

she'd give me an "A"
if that ever happened.

Sorry.

I think you're wrong
about this one, Ally.

Trish wouldn't do something
like that on purpose.

Trust me, you haven't seen
the way she's been acting.

But she's your best friend.

I mean, sure, she can be mean, and
selfish, and heartless at times.

- But...?
- Oh no, that... that's it.

Ally, are you all right?

Not really. I got in a fight with my
best friend and tackled by a flying pig.

That was pretty funny. It's
actually trending on...

- It's on the Internet?!
- No...

Um, anyways, you shouldn't
be mad at Trish.

I spoke to Hazel and it turns
out it was all an accident.

- What do you mean?
- The motor on the spit went haywire.

There was nothing Trish
could do to stop it.

Really?

Oh great. I just blamed
Trish for no reason.

- What are you gonna do?
- First...

I'm gonna get rid of this pig smell,
and then I'm gonna make it up to her.

Oh, I don't think
that's a good idea.

You don't think Trish
is ready to forgive me?

No, I don't think you should
get rid of that pig smell.

It's really working for ya.

This place looks great.

Thanks for your help.
Trish is gonna love it.

Whoa! Nice mountain!

It's not a mountain.
It's Mauna Loa.

- My second-favorite volcano.
- Hmm.

- What's your favorite volcano?
- Mmm, I don't really have one.

Nice touch, Dez...

But please tell me it's not
actually filled with hot lava.

Would I do something
that stupid?

Do you really want
us to answer that?

Here comes Trish!
Hurry, get ready!

Oh. Oh.

Aloha!

And welcome to a very special
Hawaiian luau in your honor.

What's all this?

I wanted to make it up
to you for how I acted,

and I know how much
you love luaus...

So this is for you.

Guys?

♪ Ally wants to
say sorry to you.

♪ Ally loves you and so do we.

♪ Ally loves you and so do we.

That was sweet.

I'm so sorry I accused you
of ruining my performance.

I know you didn't do it on purpose and I'm
a terrible friend for thinking you did.

I'm sorry too. I shouldn't have
been jealous of you and Kira.

- I acted pretty stupid.
- You'll always be my best friend.

Nothing can change that.

I feel the same way.

Will you give it
a rest already?!

I'm sorry too, Trish.

I didn't mean to get
between you and Ally.

So from now on, just let me know
if I'm stepping on your toes.

Thanks.

- You're stepping on my toe.
- Oh, ah, sorry.

And here, I have
something for you.

Look! We're...

♪ Twinsies.

I appreciate it, but you
and Kira can be Twinsies.

I'm just glad we're besties.

Me too.

I never got a chance
to sing my song at the

beach club, so I'm gonna
sing it right now.

I wrote it for you.

- It's about our friendship.
- Really?

I wouldn't sing it right now.

- Why not?
- The volcano's about to erupt.

Woo!

Woo!

Dez! I thought you said there was
no hot lava in the volcano?!

It's not lava, it's salsa!

And it's not hot, it's medium.

Mmm.

I'm really proud to introduce
my best friend Ally Dawson...

Singing a song she
wrote about me.

Her B.F.F.

Trish De La Rosa.

Okay, go, Ally.

♪ Who do I call just to say "wassup?"
If the day got me down again?

♪ And who do I bug on
the five-minute break,

because I know that
you'll give me 10?

♪ And who do I call because I love that
song, and I know you'll sing along with me?

♪ When I need to make my day.

♪ Who do I call when I
need to hear "hello"?

♪ Let me go on.

♪ Though you've heard
it all before.

♪ Who do I call
to make me smile?

♪ Who do I call
to make me smile?

♪ I'll wait a while.

♪ Oh!

♪ And redial...

♪ Who do I call when I
need to hear "hello"?

♪ Let me go on.

♪ Though you've heard
it all before.

♪ Who do I call
to make me smile?

♪ Who do I call
to make me smile?

♪ I'll wait a while.

♪ Oh!

♪ And redial...

What's this?

Great Gasparilla's ghost!

Man! The booty was under
our nose this whole time.

Aw.

You said "booty" again.