Austin & Ally (2011–2016): Season 3, Episode 5 - Mix-Ups & Mistletoes - full transcript

When Trish gets a prototype from the toy company of the Austin moon Doll, everything goes wrong when the doll does unexpected things.

Subs created by: David Coleman.

Guess what I have?

Mistletoe?

Don't make us kiss.
It's embarrassing.

Mistletoe? I meant I
have sweaty armpits.

I'm working way too hard.

Break time.

Trish! How'd your meeting
at the toy company go?

Amazing. I have the prototype for this
holiday season's hottest new toy.

The Austin Moon doll.

This is cool.



And check this out.

♪ I'm gonna make...

♪ Make, make you
do a double take.

Bam!

Awesome.

Will they be ready by Christmas? I want
to give them out at the kids club party.

Yeah, these dolls are at the
top of every kid's wish list.

Little Matthew wants
an Austin doll.

Little Hanna wants
an Austin doll.

Little Dez wants a...

Little Dez?

I don't know how
that got in there.

It's supposed to go
directly to Santa.

Don't worry, Austin.



The toy company said they'll have a big
shipment ready just in time for Christmas.

Great. For a lot of these kids it's the
only gift they're gonna get this year.

Yeah. And since I'm
hosting the party,

I want to make this their
best Christmas ever.

We're gonna write a new Christmas song for
the kids and perform it as a surprise.

Great idea.

And there's gonna be
press at the party too.

So it'll be a great opportunity to
make yourself look good, Austin.

I don't care about that.

I just feel so lucky, I want to give
back to people who aren't as lucky.

Perfect. That's exactly the kind of
junk you have to say to the press.

I don't know how I'm gonna have enough time
to write a new song and plan this party.

Well, since the party's at the
beach club, let me plan it.

I'll make sure this is the best
Christmas those kids have ever had.

Wow, I've never seen you so
excited about work before, Trish.

Hey, it's for the most
worthy cause there is.

Making a child's Christmas
wish come true.

Nope. Making me look good so
I can get a big promotion.

But that child's wish thing too.

That's the Christmas spirit.

♪ When the crowd wants more,
I bring on the thunder.

♪ 'Cause you've got my back,
and I'm not going under.

♪ You're my point,
you're my guard.

♪ You're the perfect chord.

♪ And I see our names
together on every billboard.

♪ We're headed for the
top, we've got it on lock.

♪ We'll make 'em say "hey!"

♪ And we'll keep rockin'.

♪ Oh, there's no way I
could make it without ya.

♪ Do it without ya,
be here without ya.

♪ It's no fun when
you're doing it solo.

♪ With you it's like, "whoa".
Yeah, and I know.

♪ I own this dream.

♪ 'Cause I got you with me.

♪ There's no way I could
make it without ya.

♪ Do it without ya,
be here without ya.

Oh, Trish!

I'm so excited we're having the kids
club Christmas party at Shredders.

I can't thank you enough.

How about just thanking me with that party
planner promotion and we'll call it even.

Silly goose.

I can't promote you until you
pull off a disaster-free party.

We don't need another flying
pig incident like at the luau.

That was pretty funny.

I mean, that won't
ever happen again.

Ah.

Don't you just love Christmas?

♪ Deck the halls,
with jingle bells.

♪ Fa la la la.

♪ And a partridge
in a pear tree...

Yeah, that's not a song.

♪ Joy to the silent night.

♪ O, Christmas Tree!

I'm here for the Santa job.
When do we start?

I can't just give you the job. You
have to audition like everybody else.

I'm only hiring the best Santa.

Oh, I'm the best Santa because I
have this inflatable Santa suit.

Observe.

The "I ate way too many
cookies and milk" Saint Nick.

The "jolly belly like a bowl full of
jelly" chubster we know as Santa Claus.

Ho ho ho.

Impressive.

But you still have to audition
with those other Santas.

I'm surprised so many of them came out
for a job that doesn't pay anything.

It's for charity.
What did you expect?

I don't care about the money.

I'm just here to bring joy to kids
and wear a really cool fat suit.

But mostly the fat suit.

Well, since you're the only guy
left, I guess you can be Santa.

Yes!

Not so fast, Red.

Chuck. What are you doing here?

What does it look like?

I'm here to bring good tidings and
cheer to the children of Miami.

No one's as jolly as me.

I'm so jolly, when I was born, the Doctor
slapped me and I laughed in his face.

Well, I'm so jolly, people in England
don't say "have a jolly good time".

They say "have a
Chuck good time".

Guys. There's only one
way to settle this.

We're gonna have
a Santa contest.

♪ Ho ho ho...

♪ Ho ho ho...

That was terrible.

Ho ho ho.

Ho ho ho ho ho.

That was good.

Okay. I want to see who does the best
job hanging up Christmas lights.

What does that have to
do with being Santa?

It doesn't have anything to do
with me getting a promotion.

Why would you say that?

Oh, I love hanging lights.

This shouldn't be too hard.

I think I made it worse.

You have to carry these sacks
of toys across the beach

and put them in that dumpster.

Okay.

On your mark, get set...

Go!

Hey, look!

Huh?

Yes.

Ooh. Another tie.

- Are you kidding?
- No way!

Why did we throw
away those toys?

Those weren't toys.
That was trash.

You guys just saved me
like four hours of work.

Well, that's the last
of the decorations.

Hey, look.

We're under the mistletoe again.

What do you know?

- They're here!
- Austin dolls, coming through.

- They're here.
- Just in time for the party.

This isn't right.

They all have long,
flowing Princess hair.

Long, flowing, gorgeous
Princess hair.

The toy company also makes
Princess Priscilla dolls.

There must have been a
mix-up at the factory.

I can't give these freak
show dolls to the kids.

It'll ruin their Christmas.

I have to write
Santa a new letter.

I am not replacing my Teddy
Bear with one of these mutants.

What did the toy company say?

They're gonna fix the dolls
and send out a new shipment.

But because it's Christmas Eve, it's not
gonna get here till after the holidays.

- What are we gonna do?
- Relax, buddy.

You don't want to give out these
dolls because they have long hair.

I think the solution's
pretty obvious.

We'll give them these instead.

I can't give them an arts and
crafts project for Christmas.

The kids will think it's lame.

I know how to fix this, Austin.

All we have to do is
cut the dolls' hair.

Looks pretty good, huh?

I think mine's better.

Let's see yours, Ally.

I couldn't bear cutting
my doll's hair.

It's just so gorgeous.

Ah.

This is how we have to cut all the
dolls' hair, and we need to do it fast.

- The Christmas party's tomorrow.
- I know exactly what to do.

Trish, you're going to see why
I'll make the best Santa.

This Santa workshop was
a great idea, Dez.

I'm almost out of gel.

Oh, don't worry. Hey, look. One of
Santa's helpers is here with more.

For the last time, kid. I
don't work at the North Pole.

I'm just a delivery guy.

Hey. You're not just
a delivery guy.

You're a guy who
delivers dreams.

Whatever, kid.

Woo. We did it.

Those needy kids are gonna
get their Christmas wish.

And that's more important to
me than getting my promotion.

Oh, who am I kidding? I'm just
doing this for the money.

Hey, guys. I just
realized something.

That it's way too long past Labor
Day to be wearing that white top?

No.

It's Christmas morning.

Oh yeah. Merry Christmas, guys.

Merry Christmas.

Okay, enough of this sentimental garbage.
We've got presents to wrap.

It's too bad Santa
isn't here to help us.

Oh, but he is.

Say hello to Santa.

Ho ho ho ho ho ho.

Ho ho ho ho...

Not so fast, Red.

How does he always show up the exact
time Dez is about to win something?

It's one of my many talents.

I can also burp the alphabet,
tie my shoes with one hand...

And I do a pretty mean impression of my
third grade English teacher Mr. Nagel.

Hi, I'm Mr. Nagel.

Uh, how do we know if
that's a good impression?

We don't know that guy.

Trust me, it's spot on.

Before I decide who's gonna be
Santa, I have one more contest.

Which one of you can wrap
presents the fastest?

Oh, that would be me.

I'm so fast, the next time
Chuck says "Not so fast, Red".

He's gonna say
"not so Dez, Red".

Well, I'm so fast, pitchers
don't throw fastballs...

They throw Chuck balls.

I'm so fast there's now three
measurements of speed.

The speed of sound, the speed
of light, and the speed of Dez.

- I'm so fast...
- Quit yapping and start wrapping.

Yes, Ma'am.

Pfft! Amateur.

Oh, it's on.

Whoa!

Finished!

- I won.
- No, I won.

Nobody's won yet.

Let's see which Santa can carry the
most gifts down to the beach club.

We're not falling for that.

You just want us to do your work
so you can get a promotion.

Yeah.

- Hey, Red. Your shoe's untied.
- Oh, thanks.

I'm gonna win!

No, you're not.

We'd better get down
to the beach club.

I want to personally hand out
all the gifts to the kids.

I'll meet you down there.

- What are you doing?
- Uh...

Not buying you a last
minute Christmas present.

That's for sure.

Hey, look. We forgot
a couple of dolls.

I still can't figure out why
they came with baby bottles.

Mommy, change me.

The Austin doll just peed on me.

Why did it do that?

Oh no. The toy company also
makes "Mommy, Change Me" dolls.

- They must have mixed that up, too!
- That explains the bottle.

We have to get to the party before
Austin gives these to the kids.

Maybe they're not all messed up.

Mommy, change me.

Okay. They're all messed up.

Here you go, sweetie. I
hope it's what you wanted.

I got it straight
from Santa Claus.

That's me.

An Austin Moon doll? Thank
you so much, Austin.

This is the best Christmas ever.

Aw.

That's why I love Christmas.

I have to say I doubted Trish, but she
actually pulled off a disaster-free party.

Yeah, she did.

Hey, kids!

Those dolls don't just look cool. For
a real surprise, press the button.

- Mommy, change me.
- Austin, no!

That's not what they're
supposed to do.

This isn't a real Austin doll.

You ruined Christmas.

I can't believe I
ruined Christmas.

It's not your fault, Austin.
You didn't know.

Trish, do something.

The party's a disaster.

Look, kids. It's Santa.

Ho ho ho.

He's not the real Santa.

Well how about this one?

Ho ho ho.

He isn't either.

I'm Santa, little girl.

How else would I know that you
wanted an Austin doll for Christmas?

Every kid in Miami wanted one.

She's good.

Neither one of you is Santa.

I'm Santa.

No, I'm Santa.

No, I'm Santa.

No, I'm Santa.

No, I'm Santa.

No, I'm Santa!

- No, I'm Santa!
- I'm Santa.

- No, I'm Santa.
- I'm Santa.

No, I'm Santa.

First I ruin Christmas, now
they're ruining the party.

On the bright side, no one's paying
attention to the dolls anymore.

So...

About that promotion?

I give promotions
to party planners.

Not party wreckers!

Wait wait. I can save this.

Kids, go eat Christmas cookies.

Austin and Ally, get ready. Dez
and Chuck, clean this place up.

- Why do we have to clean this place up?
- Do you want to see new year's?

Yes, Ma'am.

And now to make your Christmas wishes come
true, give it up for Austin and Ally.

♪ What's your favorite
time of year?

♪ Can you tell me?

♪ The one that never
gets here fast enough.

♪ Is it fall or spring?

♪ A summer thing?

♪ Winter is my
favorite time because.

♪ A billion lights are blinking.

♪ Jingle bells are ringing.

♪ Everybody's singing
"I love Christmas".

♪ Santa's almost flying.

♪ Lots of ribbon tying.

♪ Presents multiplying.

♪ I love Christmas!

♪ Oh-oh-whoa-oh-oh-oh.

♪ Oh-oh-whoa-oh-oh-oh.

♪ Oh-oh-whoa-oh-oh-oh.

♪ I love Christmas!

♪ You'd better watch out for
that mistletoe, they're hanging.

♪ Or you might have to
pucker up and kiss someone.

♪ Friends you know, are
gonna pray for snow.

♪ A winter wonderland's
a lot more fun.

♪ A lot more fun.

♪ I love Christmas!

♪ I love Christmas!

♪ A billion lights are blinking.

♪ Jingle bells are ringing.

♪ Everybody's singing.

♪ "I love Christmas".

♪ Santa's almost flying.

♪ Lots of ribbon tying.

♪ Presents multiplying.

♪ I love Christmas!

♪ Oh-oh-whoa-oh-oh-oh.

♪ Oh-oh-whoa-oh-oh-oh.

♪ Oh-oh-whoa-oh-oh-oh.

♪ I love Christmas!

I take it back, Austin. You
didn't ruin Christmas.

This is the best Christmas ever.

For me too.

I told you Christmas
wasn't about presents.

I'm glad you think so. Because
I didn't get you anything.

What?

I'm kidding.

So... I decided you're
getting that promotion.

Congratulations, Trish.

You're Shredders'
new party planner.

Really? Thank you. So
when do I get my raise?

Oh, this promotion doesn't
come with more money.

Just a bigger title
and longer hours.

Merry Christmas, party planner.

See you tomorrow at 6:00 A.M.

Let that be a
lesson to you, kid.

Hard work is waste of time.

You make a pretty
good Santa, Dez.

Thanks, Chuck. You too.

We'll call this one a tie
as long as you admit

that I'm better than you
at everything else.

Deal. Wait, what?

- Merry Christmas, Red.
- I got something for you, too.

I love it.

I love it too.

I don't know why we're
always so competitive.

We should stop doing that.

But you have to admit
I'm nicer than you.

Actually, I'm a lot
nicer than you.

- No, I'm nicer than you.
- I'm definitely nicer.

Thanks, Austin. I love it.

Merry Christmas, Ally.

Hey, look. We're under
the mistletoe again.

Well, rules are rules.

- I'm nicer.
- No, I'm nicer.

Look out!

You're right, Red.

You are nicer.

Ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho!

I've got a delivery
here for Austin Moon.

That's me.

Hey, it's the Austin Moon doll.

♪ I'm gonna make...

♪ Make, make you
do a double take.

Bam!

- They're all fixed.
- But, that's weird.

The toy company said they wouldn't
be ready till after Christmas.

Hey, that guy looks a
lot like Santa Claus.

You don't think...

That Larry really works for Santa?
I knew it!

For the last time kid I don't work at the
North Pole, I'm just a delivery guy.

Aw!

Let's get the sleigh and got out of
here Santa, we almost blew our cover.