As If (2021–…): Season 1, Episode 12 - Atin Bulunusu - full transcript

Where the hell did this come from?

-It's an animal.
-Animal.

-What the hell is that thing?
-I don't know, but it's huge.

Is it an ox?

-Maybe.
-But it's very slim.

-Does it have rabies?
-Rabies?

-That one has no horns.
-Yes.

-Its tail looks like hair.
-Yes.

-That is not an ox.
-No, it's not.

Brother, it could be a...

-Wolf!
-Really?



I don't know.

If such a wolf came to the plateau,
we are doomed.

What is that thing?

-Wolves don't make such a sound.
-It's not a wolf.

-Where are you going?
-Come on.

-I will hunt it.
-Hold on. What are you doing?

Don't. Let's get closer to it.

-Don't do it.
-Come with me. Don't worry.

-It ran away because of you.
-It's so fast.

It ran away because of you!

-Because of me?
-Yes.

Are you okay?

I feel dizzy.

I'm...



-Are you a little better?
-Yes.

-Will you carry me on the way back?
-Will do.

-I feel bad. I'm sorry.
-No problem.

I promised to take you back.

-I'm so sorry.
-No problem. Come on then.

-Let's go back.
-May god bless you, Barlıbay.

-Peace be with you.
-Thanks.

-Peace be with you.
-Hop on.

Lean a little more.

Hold on.

You couldn't hop on. Hold on tight.

-Are you comfortable?
-Yes, go on.

You couldn't do it.
Tear it down and do it again.

Nice and slow.

You! Collect branches!

-Get off then.
-Thanks.

-No problem.
-What's up, Boyga?

-Fine.
-I'm glad to see you.

How's it going? What's up, Barlıbay?

Fine, Khan! How are you?

-Same as ever.
-Something crazy is going on.

-Something crazy going on, Boyga.
-Really?

-Don't ask, don't tell. It's crazy.
-Is it personal, or public?

-What do you mean?
-Does it concern you, me,

both of us, or everyone?

-It concerns everyone.
-Yes, everyone.

-Everyone?
-Everyone.

Okay, good.
Then let's talk about this at council.

The council will meet at sunset.

You've turned everything into a game.
Let me tell you now.

No, this is a matter of state.

It would be better
if we talk to everyone, okay?

-Okay then.
-At sunset!

-At sunset.
-At sunset.

-At sunset.
-At sunset.

-He's putting on airs.
-You should eat this in its own fat.

-I would eat it!
-Me too!

Khan Boyga!

You all have to stand up
when he says Khan Boyga, you know that.

It's okay this time,
but watch out for next time, please.

What the hell is this?

A bird.

I'm not talking about that,
I'm talking about Boyga.

Is it because he said council?

Yes, and he looks down on people
in general.

What can we do? He became the Khan.

What are you talking about?
How did he become the Khan?

He just declared himself Khan.

He said I am the Khan,
and you start saying Khan Boyga.

So? Crowded communities
need to have a leader.

He needs to organize us,
divide the labor.

Do we need a division of labor?
We just collect branches, and stones.

How are we crowded?
There are ten of us.

-What about hunting, or fire?
-Don't you know what to do?

-Do you need a leader?
-The work we do is always changing.

Someone has to divide labor.

-Maybe we'll multiply in the future.
-You wish.

-Without a leader there will be chaos.
-What chaos?

We have 15 people here. If we fuck like
bunnies, we'll multiply in 1000 years.

We had our own nomadic group,
but we were kicked out of it.

There was a Khan there,
but it was nomad group with 1000 tents.

-Why did they expel us?
-Why?

Ask Boyga, and he'll tell you.

-Why should I ask the Khan?
You tell me.

-Don't call him Khan!

He said, I am the Khan, and you said,
you are the Khan, right away.

You can't see that kind of thing
anywhere in the world.

-You can see it everywhere!
-fuck off!

Should I count them all?
Every nomad group has a Khan.

Every nomad group has a Khan,
but we're not a nomad group!

Saying I am the Khan,
won't make you a Khan.

In the nomad groups, being Khan
is passed from father to son.

Don't go against it, this is
God's order. You have to accept it.

Whenever you are in trouble,
you immediately mention God.

Why'd God choose a leader for five men?

We have five people today,
but one day we will be 1000.

Maybe we'll go somewhere else. There
is rich soil beyond the mountains.

Be careful. You are a stargazer.

-There is nothing beyond the mountains.
-How do you know?

Go and see. There is nothing there,
I won't come.

-How do you know? Did you go?
-There is a river here at least.

-You do this just to annoy me.
-"You are the Khan!"

"Yes, I'm the Khan!"

-Are you jealous, huh?
-fuck off!

"Give me half of the meat,
give me half of the milk."

We collect stones, we collect branches.
We don't anything else to do.

Shouldn't someone represent us
symbolically?

Look at yourself! Do you think
you are someone to be represented?

Who would represent you and why?

I'm saying for all of us,
not just you.

The ten people here
don't need representation.

We need to eat,
we need to light a fire.

We live a simple life.

But he is just a show off.

-You should've said "I'm Khan" then.
-Yes, I could have.

-Then I'd be the Khan. That's absurd.
-But you didn't.

Why would I say it?

I'm not the Khan,
why would I say "I am the Khan?"

-But someone said it!
-Oh, boy!

We're not on the same page.

I'm nine years old.
I have one or two years left to live.

-Am I going to deal with this?
-You don't know that.

God knows that.
Maybe you'd live another nine years.

My ass!

Why won't you live?
Don't you know Master Kündengi.

-He is 20 years old.
-He just lies down.

He lies down for 20 years.
You would live if you lie down.

That's true.

You have no social consciousness.

Because we are not a society.
There are only ten people here.

What consciousness?

You must have a vision.

I'll go down by the river,
do you want something?

I want a stone.

It would be good.

If you're ready,
I'm starting the assembly, Khan.

Khan Boyga!

-Who the hell is this?
-Kutalmış.

Yes, I know, but we have to talk about
this Khan thing.

You have decided very quickly.

Please! We are very transparent.
We can talk whenever you want.

My people, Yılmaz and Barlıbay said,

they wanted to talk about something

that concerns us all today,
and I give my permission.

-Yes, Yılmaz?
-I rode Barlıbay today,

and we went to hunt by the river.

We passed the stones.
It was so cold.

-He's right.
-My nose got frozen.

Yes, he's right.

You know the three hills, right?

We planned an ambush there.

-Yes, we did.
-I had a bow.

-I had an axe.
-He's right.

We were waiting for a rabbit.

Yes, he's right, for a rabbit.

-We were waiting.
-And we just saw it.

-We were looking to hunt.
-It was an animal.

-It was just standing there.
-An animal.

-Animal?
-Animal.

-What kind of animal?
-It was incredible.

-It was huge.
-Huge!

It had two pointed ears.

Pointed.
Its tail was like women's hair.

Yes, you're right.

-It was muscled.
-Its nostrils were huge.

Its nose was both large and long.

It had a very strange voice.

We cannot imitate it.

-He's right.
-Come on. It's just absurd.

But then what did we do?

-We got closer.
-We wanted to look at it.

I wanted to shoot it.

-We have to tell it chronologically.
-Yes, I am.

-You just went to the last part.
-I said, "I want to shoot it."

-No, I said...
-You said, "Let's take a closer look."

-Hold on. What did I say to you?
-What?

-"Drop it. Let's take a closer look."
-Yes, you did.

After the animal saw you?

We don't know if it saw us.

No, I don't think it had seen us.

Maybe it did.
We got closer, I took the branch.

I threw it, it made a strange voice,
and ran away. It ran very fast.

We told it like shit because of you.
You didn't let me tell chronologically.

-Come on, you tell us.
-Really, why couldn't you tell?

-We did tell.
-You can't do this properly.

He can't do it.

-You just went to the last part.
-You need to practice.

I told it in chronological order,
but you didn't accept it.

-No, you got confused.
-Isn't it right?

I said we were getting close
to the animal.

-Okay.
-But you said,

"Its hair was like women's hair."

No, I said,
"Its tail was like women's hair."

Okay, anyway.

-Also, it had hair.
-No, not like this.

It was like women's hair, too.

-Yes.
-Barlıbay, make a good presentation.

-Draw it.
-Okay, hold on.

What kind of description is this?
We didn't understand anything.

There were some black rocks.

It is not easy to describe something
that has not been seen before, Khan.

-When did you see this animal?
-At noon.

-The sun was right overhead.
-Overhead, or was it descending?

It was right overhead.

-Did it rise from the bottom?
-Yes, from the bottom.

How else would it rise?

What did you do? You drew an extra leg.

No, it was like this.

-But it had four legs. I counted them.
-I counted them, too.

But you drew five legs.
Did you count while it was running?

How do I know?

If you're drawing wrongly,
then draw ten legs.

Isn't it more or less like that?

But you are giving them the wrong idea!

Get out of here!
It's more or less like that.

Yes, it was bigger than that.

-And it has a scream.
-Right.

-What the hell is this?
-It's more or less like that.

-But it was bigger than that.
-Yes, more or less.

-It was bigger and more muscular.
-Yes, it was huge.

-It was huge.
-Could it be a wolf?

-No!
-No, it wasn't a wolf.

-Are you sure?
-It was definitely not a wolf.

-We know wolves.
-Its voice

was like a woman's scream,
but much louder.

-The voice of wolves is not like that.
-No, it's not.

Okay then. My people,
keep your eyes open.

If anyone sees this creature,
let Kutalmış know immediately.

He will let me know, is that clear?

It may have passed through here,
we don't know.

Okay? Yılmaz, take this.

-Here.
-What is this?

-It's a reward.
-Why a reward?

Because you've provided a service
for our nomad group.

-What about me?
-Take it.

-No, it's yours. Let's split it.
-Take it.

-Together...
-Take it, please!

-Didn't you like it?
-No, but...

-It's not about that.
-Reward!

Why do we tell Kutalmış?

Why don't we just tell you?

I mean, it's just easier.

For example, you will see me,
and tell me...

But I will forget.
You tell him, he will tell me.

I'm hungry. Do we have any fruit?

-Do we?
-Do you have any fruit?

Fruit? I don't think so.

-Kutalmış, do we have any?
-We collected red fruit yesterday.

Shall I send Mengü to collect it?

I collected them yesterday,
and gave it all to Khan.

-I gave it to you.
-When?

-Yesterday.
-Did you give them to him?

-Yes.
-Where are they now?

-We buried them, right?
-Right.

We've buried them.

-What?
-Where did you bury them?

-Why?
-Why did you bury them?

Sometimes the weather conditions
can be unfavorable.

So, we've buried them for winter.

-Okay, but...
-When will we eat them?

-In the winter.
-Why?

-You wouldn't understand.
-We are in the winter now.

-There will be harsher winter.
-This is harsh.

When we are about to die of starvation,
Kutalmış will get out the fruit.

-When the blizzard comes.
-When it will be harsher winter.

-We're saving them for a rainy day.
-We could eat them.

We think about these things.
We will need them in difficult days.

Would it be bad if we had some fruit
for the guests

when the council is convened?

-We could keep it as a treat.
-As a treat.

-We could keep it like that.
-Okay, we'll think about it.

Don't get me wrong,
I say this as a criticism.

While I collect it,
I eat two or three of them.

That is the collector's right.

-Right.
-No, that's not right!

-Everyone eats some while collecting.
-That's not right.

-What do you mean?
-That's not right, Mengü!

-But the collector should eat some.
-Let it be like this this time.

-But don't do it again!
-Do you want all of them?

Yes.

This is a thousand-year law.
The collector should eat some.

The collector eats some.
Do we have any meat?

-Do we have meat?
-No.

-There is no meat.
-I didn't eat any meat.

What do you mean?
You ate four birds yesterday.

-Bird is meat?
-Yes.

-Yes.
-It's meat.

-I ate meat.
-Anyway, do we have any?

I told Mengü yesterday that
he had to hunt. Did you hunt?

-I brought you what I hunted, Khan.
-Then we don't have any.

Girls, don't touch the branches.

They made my hands feel strange.

-Yılmaz!
-What's up, Burçin?

-I'm fine, come here!
-Okay, I'm coming.

-Tolunay, Almuna.
-Hi, nice to meet you.

I know you by sight, but we didn't
have the opportunity to meet.

-What have you been up to?
-Same as ever.

We hunt, collect branches,

collect stones. I mean, same old story.

Let me ask you something,
we're collecting blackberries tomorrow.

-Alright.
-Would you carry me there?

Tomorrow?

-To the forest by the lake?
-Yes.

Alright. I will carry you tomorrow.

How will you get back?

I thought you'd carry me
on the way back, if you don't mind.

It depends how long you'd stay there.
We are so busy right now.

-Every second is important.
-I mean, it won't take long.

So I'd carry you, and I'd wait there,
and we'd come back together,

or I'd come back, and do my job,

and get back at a time we've agreed?
What would we do?

If you are busy, you can come back
at a time we've agreed.

Okay then.

If I can arrange it,
I can get my job done there too.

No problem. You're going to carry
each other out, right?

-Yes.
-Okay.

It's okay for tomorrow, but don't
set off as an odd number from now on.

If there were four of you,
everyone could carry each other.

No problem for me though.

A few days ago your birthday
was celebrated in the trees, right?

You turned 3 years old. Happy birthday.
I didn't get the chance on the day.

3... By the way, you don't look like 3.
I'd say 2 at most.

-There will be rain tonight.
-Do you think so?

Maybe it will rain tomorrow.
I don't know.

Brother!

Brother!

Yılmaz, get up!

-What the hell is going on?
-They saw it again.

This time they saw a flock.

-What did they see?
-That animal of yours.

They saw it by the lake.
There was a flock of them.

What animal of mine?

Khan is calling. Get up.

-Who the hell is Khan?
-Khan Boyga.

-Who saw them, again?
-Our guys saw them, get up!

They ran, I thought they were leaving.

I wanted to go after them,
and take a look.

They turned back, and started running.

-Do they run?
-Such a run!

I can't describe it!

As they go, they raise such dirt

that you'd think
Tatu's demons have come.

They were like the wind.

-They were swift as an arrow.
-What we saw was running, too.

-They were so fast!
-What are you yelling for?

-What the hell is going on?
-My people!

Alright, I'll handle it! Gather around!

We'll find this animal. Get ready!

Yılmaz, İlteriş, Mengü...

Kutalmış, Barlıbay, Ögeday, Sunrise...

Are you going to say everybody's name
one by one?

Let's all go together, what's the point
of saying so many names?

Alright! Kutalmış,
inform Sungur, Akçuray,

-and Tengiray, okay?
-Okay.

Please don't interfere with everything!
Let's go!

-Run!
-Hurry up!

Hurry up!

If there are really 10 or 15 of them,
it would be enough for us all winter.

-We won't have to hunt anything else.
-Are we really going to hunt them?

We don't know if their meat is edible.

Could we use them in a different way
instead of hunting?

I swear, I was going to say the same.

What do you mean by
in a different way? Like the oxes?

Are you saying we should make them
guard animals?

It is also ridiculous that
we make the ox a guard animal.

I've said it over and over,
but you never listen to me.

What should we do with the oxes?
Do you have a suggestion?

I've said we need to ride on them.

We carry each other,
our spines get injured!

We got on them, "Come on, walk!"
we said, but nothing happened.

We have to ride them many times,
we didn't try that much.

We've only got on them just once,
that's not enough.

Are you crazy?
We will kill, and eat them. That's all.

You shout a lot.
Keep quiet, or they will hear us.

Do you know what I'm thinking?

-Milk!
-What milk?

If this animal has a female version,
it'll be able to produce some milk.

-"If it has a female version?"
-It was just a figure of speech.

I know one animal that doesn't have
a female version, and that is you.

So funny!

It's okay to kill and eat the animal,
but when I say milk...

What will you do,
will you milk the animal?

It's an idea! What will yo do?

-Will you ride on the animal?
-That is also an idea.

Wait! Wait,
and let's think about this.

My people, stop!

-We'll think!
-Let's think about it.

Would you get on the back
of such a big animal?

Let's say the animal
wouldn't throw you off.

How would you handle the animal?
How would you lead it where you wanted?

Would we always just go
where the animal wants?

Let's say the animal would stop,
drink water,

eat some food,
and stop for three hours.

Would we stand there for three hours?
That's ridiculous.

-He's right. That's ridiculous.
-Why are you telling me this?

-Did I say something?
-Didn't you say let's ride on them?

Didn't you say,
"You must have a vision?"

-That's not a vision.
-That's a vision!

We kill,
and eat all the animals we catch.

-Let's do something else.
-I want to say something.

-Shoot.
-We go out to hunt them,

but what do these animals feed on?

If they eat meat, they can attack us.

We go out with our bows,
nothing will happen.

Fuck off, you coward!

Guys, you know why his name is Sunrise?

It's the same old shit.
Go on, tell them.

We all earn our names.

For example, they threw me
into the river, but I didn't drown.

For example, Boyga killed a leopard.

But it was a baby leopard, he couldn't
have killed it, if it was big.

Watch your mouth! I'm the Khan!

Okay, we're friends,
but I'm a statesman.

How many times have I said it?
Get that into your head!

Anyway.
He couldn't do a single heroic thing.

He was seven years old,
but still didn't have a name.

Finally, the elders gave him
a generic name.

They named him Sunrise.
They even got stuck between

Grass or Sunrise.
If only they named him Grass!

My father gave me this name!

My father gave me this name.

Because I was born at sunrise.

My people, hide!

-Let's run away!
-Don't run away!

My people, follow my orders!

What's that noise?
Is it an earthquake?

That noise must be coming from
behind the clouds!

-Or from underground!
-Is this the noise, Barlıbay?

-Is this the noise, Yılmaz?
-No, this is so much louder!

-This is louder!
-How much louder?

This is so much louder!

-This is so so much louder!
-The first one was softer than this.

Is this louder?

This is much worse than
what we heard, Khan Boyga!

He means, this is so much louder.

But you can't describe it.

-Is this a flock, Barlıbay?
-It might be, Yılmaz!

What else it can be? It's a flock!

What is this?

-We don't know.
-What do we do with it?

We've caught it, and brought it.

-Do you know what this is?
-What?

-This is the soul of our ancestors.
-It might be.

What might be? My grandfather
didn't shit like that in his life.

What ancestors? This is an animal!

-What about sexual...
-Shut up! Don't talk nonsense!

Why are you yelling at him?

What's got into you?
You object to everything!

If you continue like this,
I'll have to punish you!

-Punish?
-Yes.

-Me?
-Yes.

-You'll punish me?
-Yes.

-Come on, punish me.
-What the hell are you doing, Yılmaz?

Let our great Khan punish me.
Come on, bury me up to my waist!

-When it comes to that point.
-Please.

-Don't push me!
-Come on!

He is our Khan!

Why don't you
show some respect for him?

Don't you talk! I'll kick your ass
in the middle of this village!

I went to war with his father
when I was four years old!

We were fighting while you were
playing games! Don't you talk!

When I went to war with your father,
you were crying, you fool!

If we are going to have a Khan,
it should be me, but I don't want it.

But when it comes to principle,
I should be the Khan!

You can't be Khan, even if you want to.

The first one who says "I'm the Khan!"
is the Khan.

-What kind of rule is that?
-Let me tell you something,

we need to deal with this animal first,
then we'll talk.

Actually, I also have some questions.

Ask your questions to our Khan!

We expect some service from you, Khan!
Do your thing!

Didn't you see this animal first?
Didn't you say let's go and see?

Did I get this animal out of my ass?

Is that how it happened? No!
Why are you doing this?

Okay then. Let's release the animal!

-It makes us feel unhappy.
-Is that so?

Let's release the animal,
huh, Barlıbay?

-Is that so?
-We're fighting because of it.

You're stupid.
What's the animal got to do with it?

Am I stupid?
I'm doing this for our society's sake!

What kind of vision is this? Shall
we release such a magnificent creature?

Whenever we find something,
we form a circle, then we release it.

We form a circle, and we release it.
Is that what we are?

-Come on, do your Khan thing!
-Okay, I've got your point.

-What's my point?
-Take this.

-No! Don't!
-Take it, you are the Khan!

Let's give it up for our new Khan!

Would you say Khan Yılmaz out loud?

-Khan Yılmaz!
-Let's give it up for him!

-That's not my point.
-Khan Yılmaz!

That's not my point.
Put it on your head, and fuck off!

My point is, we've been lying here
in shit for a thousand seasons!

I can't take it anymore!
I'm sick of it!

Do you know why they expelled us

from our nomad group, our home?

We came here of our own accord.

Shut up! Do you know why they
expelled us, Barlıbay?

-Why?

Boyga got caught
while drawing his own flag!

-I was drawing a picture!
-fuck off!

I was drawing a picture! Don't lie!

-You don't fool anybody!
-Don't lie!

Our Khan caught you
while you were drawing your own flag.

Did I ask for you?

Your desire for power has ruined us!

I wanted just one thing
in this world!

And it was everything!

Do you know why they
expelled us, Barlıbay?

Boyga and everyone
who know him got expelled!

Why did you come with me then?
Did I ask for you?

We couldn't help it! We got expelled!

If we could,
we would have stayed.

-Do I have to apologize?
-He comes and makes a frog!

But when the day comes,
it would be a fog!

-But when...
-What are you doing? Fuck off!

Who the hell are you?
Who the hell is this?

Didn't you get beaten three years ago
for looking at women's asses?

Did you become a shaman
when you grew your beard?

I hate this guy!
Who the hell is this guy?

-You're too much!
-What are you talking about?

That's custom!

-Fuck this custom!
-You can't object to our customs!

-fuck off!
-We need a sage in our village!

If he is the sage of the village,
then fuck the village!

He is the sage of the village!
We chose him!

He sees things differently!
We chose him!

That does it! Do you want me to
beat you up in front of everyone?

-Really? Come on then!
-Come on, huh?

-Come on then!
-Come on, huh?

You finally made me do this!

I leave you with your chains!

-But when the day comes...
-Fuck off!

Fuck off!