About a Boy (2014–2015): Season 2, Episode 16 - About a Memory Hole - full transcript

I don't mind letting you
drink for free, Will,

but the margin on olives
is very thin, so...

Oh, well, I'm making
a point here, Liz.

Each one of these
olives represent a time

that we've hung out
together here at work.

- Aw.
- Mm-Hmm.

So this is our
one, two, three...

Fourth date!

No, no, no. Not a date.

No, a date is when you go out
with someone to someplace

other than their place of work.



What we've had are visits.

Now, on our first visit, you
told me all about your son.

And on our second visit,

you told me about how
you lost your virginity

and that abomination that
you call a pinkie toe.

In all seriousness,

I love actually
hanging out with you,

but we need to go on a date date

- what's going on?
- I know, I know, I know, but...

Will, I am a single
mom working two jobs,

and I have to tell you, I
have been burned before

by guys with baggage and
messy, emotional attachments.

There was a guy who was
divorcing his wife

and then a guy who
lived with his mom



and then the guy who bought
lingerie for his sister.

- Yikes.
- Yeah, that happened.

I need a guy with no
drama, no surprises.

That is me. That's totally me.

I don't even have a sister.

Yeah, but everybody, every single
person has their something,

and I have yet to figure
out what yours is.

I'm sorry. I am
just this charming,

drama-free gentleman
you see before you.

- Really?
- Mm-Hmm.

So no something? Nothing weird?

- Better take this.
- All right.

Hello?

Don't hello me! Where are you?

Fiona is not taking this breakup with Mr.
Chris well at all!

Heartbreak be gone!
Happiness return!

Heartbreak be gone!

Happiness return!

Andy, what the hell
is going on there?

The doula session has
gone dark, Will.

That's what going on!

Well, you're the one who
wanted your umpteenth kid

delivered by a fake,
baby-helping person.

She's touching me again, Andy!

I just want to listen
to the sound of a heart

that's never been broken.

Hey. What was all that?

Oh, cable guy. Yeah,
scheduling snafu.

Yeah, I gotta run
but, uh, you were

about to agree to go
on a date with me.

I want to. I really do.

But what free time I do have,

I mostly just spend
it running errands.

We could do that.
I love errands.

You want to run errands with me?

Well, I want to do a lot
of things with you, Liz,

but we can start there.

We can start with errands.

Okay, let me think about it.

You know, we can do
some of my errands too.

You can help me pick out
a nightie for my mommy.

Here we go.

♪ Well, maybe it's
the common curse ♪

♪ maybe things get bad
before they get worse ♪

♪ I don't want to
become someone ♪

♪ who can't live up to what
I already done, don't ♪

♪ the kid is back,
is back on track ♪

♪ he's the underdog, he's
coming out on top, and ♪

Okay, here you go.

I made you some hot tea.

And I whispered happy
thoughts into its steam.

And I only judged it silently.

Oh. Sorry and thank you.

I just miss Chris so much.

Well, I...

Are you showing me affection?

Just support. Yeah.

Yeah, but caring support.

Well, talking about it makes it...
makes it weirder.

But honestly, you know, Fiona,

I know it may not
seem like it now

but there's gonna come a day
where all this pain you feel

is just gonna go away.

And that day is tomorrow!

Tomorrow is when we do
our reflection ritual.

Yeah, it's this amazing
thing that Marcus and I do

to heal when we've been through

a significant
emotional challenge.

You should do it with us, Will!

No, that seems unnecessary.

What an excellent idea!

Oh, my gosh! Yes!

You can mourn the loss of Dr.
Sam,

and we could grieve
our losses together.

Actually, I'm good. I'm good.

I've been there, mourned
that, you know.

All right, Marcus and I
will just do it alone...

Forever and ever...

I'm not gonna pretend. I'm
doing the the ritual with you.

Whatever you guys need,
I'm gonna help out, okay?

I'm gonna... I'm your guy.

Lovely, lovely. Thank you.

Group hug?

Okay. Let's bring it in here.

Make it quick.

Let met get this.

Just one more minute.

- Oh, that's enough for one...
- Oh, no, no, no, no, no!

We're just starting the
healing here, guys.

Hey-o! Whoa!
Everybody's in black.

I kind of like it, guys.
You're looking good.

Shh.

The Reflection Ritual starts
with the Morning of Mourning.

And what is that?

It is a time of quietude

from the European
monastic tradition

of the daily great silence.

Okay, well, is there any room
in the tradition for Asiago...

Fasting?

Ah, ah, ah, ah!

Uh...

Okay, all right, well, um,

how long does this whole, uh,

monistat 7 silence thing last?

Not long. Just until we
dig the Memory Hole.

The what, now?

Wow. You're really
good at digging, Will.

Just out of curiosity, what
is the Memory Hole for?

Well, when it's deep enough,

Mom will throw in all the things

that remind her of Mr. Chris.

And how do we know
when it's deep enough?

Well, the depth of
the Memory Hole

is directly proportionate

to the depth of Mom's despair.

_

Ugh.

Wow. It's like that dirt
did something to you.

The Morning of
Mourning is complete!

All right, what do
you think, Mom?

Is the Memory Hole deep enough?

Oh, yeah. That's great.

Ooh, I was gonna do this
alphabetically to...

To throw them in, but I think
there might be some merit

to a chronological disposal.

_

There's no place for texting on
the Day of Reflection, Will.

Oh, sorry. Okay, let's do this!

Let's throw all of Chris's crap
in the hole and get to it.

Maybe throw a couple
of these in there.

- I'll take this box.
- No, hey, hey! No!

You take each item and give
it its proper valediction.

Definition?

Basically, Mom gives a
eulogy of every item.

Every item?

"Two households,

"both alike in dignity

"in fair Verona

"where we lay our scene.

"From ancient grudge
breaks new mutiny."

Oh, dear...

Sorry, sorry. Go on.

- What's wrong?
- I just, uh...

Romeo and Juliet, you
know, two lovers burdened

by circumstance and time,

it just reminds me of
me and Sam, you know.

- Aw.
- Maybe I haven't

properly mourned what
happened with us.

And I just feel like... I'm a wreck.
Look at me.

Well, you do seem pretty sweaty.

I-I think I should...
I think I should burn

some of her stuff too.

It's so brave of you
to face your emotions

and purge your painful memories.

Yeah. It's so painful.

The thing is, uh, a
lot of her stuff

is in a storage unit in Oakland.

I'll go grab that now.

- In Oakland?
- Yeah, it's about an hour away,

two, three with traffic, so
it shouldn't be too long.

Oh, okay. Well,
I'll tell you what.

I'll eulogize Chris's stuff

while you're getting
Sam's stuff,

and then we'll have our
ceremonial burning together.

Really? You would wait for me?

- I would.
- I'll be right back.

Man, there's gonna be
so much healing today.

I know!

Hey. I heard it was
laundry day, so...

I got you a little gift.

Laundry detergent.

Mm-Hmm, with microbial
stain blockers.

Ooh, microbial stain
blockers are so hot.

So hot.

Ah!

You okay?

It was him or me.

Oh, sexy boots.

Oh, sabered Prosecco.

No pro-seconds for me now.

Ooh!

All right...

I'm very good at... No,
what are you doing?

Here, fold a T-shirt.

I'll refold this. You
didn't do this right.

No. I got it.

- I'll do this one.
- Stop.

- Two limes!
- And an apple.

- One apple!
- Two avocados.

- Two avocados!
- Get there.

Carrots. Is he coming?

I don't know.

Paper towels coming! Get it!

Yeah!

Dear flute.

You really have blown
your last note of love.

_

Free samples? Oh, that's great.

I could do something like that.

Okay.

Uh, you're supposed to...

No.

I had so much fun
with you today.

Me too. I think next time
we step up our game.

You know what?

I think you've earned something
a little more romantic.

- Really?
- Mm-Hmm.

Oh, too bad my next day
off isn't for two weeks

You know, we could always
try to get you fired.

Yeah, we could do that!

I'll fire you.

Ah, I wish I could stay, but...

I have to go pick up my son
from this birthday party.

I would give you $1.8 million

to spend another hour with you.

Wow.

That came out way
more prostitute-y

than I intended.

- It did.
- It did.

Okay, I'm gonna go
to the bathroom.

- I'll be right back.
- All right.

Hey, buddy. What's going on?

Why haven't you replied
to any of my texts?

Um, well, I'm in Oakland.

You try getting a good
signal in Oakland.

You're still coming back, right?

Uh, I'm coming back right now.

Uh, I'll see you
soon, buddy, okay?

On my way!

Hey! Great news!

My son called, and
he wants to stay

at the birthday party
for a few more hours,

so what do you want to do?

A few more hours? Well, I...

Well, I don't want you
to get sick of me.

Too much of a good thing, you
know what I mean? Mmm...

How about you show
me your place?

My place?

Yeah.

Uh... Um...

Uh-oh! Surprise inspection!

- No, no, no.
- What every man fears!

Are you up for that?

Or are you afraid I'm gonna
find something I don't like?

We are going to my
place, all right?

- Yeah?
- That's a perfect idea.

- I love it.
- Okay.

Let's go to my place.

- Okay.
- Wow.

What a nice place.

Let's take a look.

- Oh!
- Ooh.

Hey, why no lights?

Yeah, we're in a drought.

Why are you whispering?

Oh, um... yeah, my
neighbors have a newborn

and he's real
sensitive, you know.

Anything wakes him up, so...

Oh, is that why we parked all
the way down the street?

Totally, yeah, totally.

He's real sensitive to the...
You know, the hum

of a German motor.

- Yeah?
- Yeah.

I think, if I'm being honest,

that it's kind of a, you know,

a vibrational thing,
when I think about it,

but let's head upstairs.

Okay.

Uh, hey, Will,

I just, um... I
just have to say,

it's kind of been a long time

since I've been with a guy.

And it's definitely
been a long time

since I've felt this
way about one, so...

I just wanted you to know that.

Uh, I appreciate that. Let's go.

Careful, you may wake the baby.
Lighten your steps.

Oh, yeah.

Hey, hey, um... I'm gonna...
You go upstairs.

I just got to run back to...

You know, the baby...
The baby is...

The whole thing's happening.

Okay.

Marcus.

Where are you?

Sorry, man, I am just in
the gnarliest traffic.

Um, do you mind delaying
the ceremonial burning?

It's gonna take me
probably about an hour.

- An hour?
- Actually, you know what?

It's been a while since
I've done it, so...

Probably 45 minutes, maybe.

- What?
- What? Nothing, nothing.

I'm gonna be there as soon
as I can, bud, all right?

Right as I get
through the traffic.

So what item of Sam's
did you bring to burn?

Uh, I'm gonna keep that a
surprise for you, big boy.

Will, a light just went
on in your bedroom.

There's someone in your house!

The traffic just lightened up.
It's a miracle!

I'll be home in two minutes!

- I'm gonna call the cops.
- Don't call the cops!

Don't call the cops!
Do not call the cops!

Okay! Where were we?

Shh! You'll wake the baby!

What baby?

Oh, yeah, right!

What... yeah...

Yeah, yeah, yeah, no,
everything's perfect.

- Yeah, everything's good, yeah.
- Everything's just perfect.

There we go.

Yeah.

Ooh.

Um, um, um, um, you
know what I'm gonna do?

I am gonna go and
get us some wine.

Uh, well, I think we're
pretty past the wine part.

Now, yes, but after, you
know, when we want the wine,

I won't have to go
down naked and get it.

You know what I mean? Okay.
I'll be right back.

- Oh.
- Oh, uh...

Can I borrow this?

I'll just borrow
this real quick.

My wine cellar gets a
little bit drafty.

Well, why don't you just,
uh, take your own shirt?

Uh, 'cause... Well,
I would, you know,

but, uh, uh, I'm already
all the way over here.

Huh?

Okay, guys, I'm here.

Uh, I think we should
call the police,

because what if the
person robbing your house

comes through the
dumbwaiter, robs my house?

There's nobody in my house.

My bedroom light is on a timer.

It's an easy explanation,
totally plausible.

Anyway, I'm here for
the burning ceremony,

and I got Sam's
sweater, so let's go!

Okay, well, you're gonna
have to put Sam's sweater

in the Memory Hole.

I... you know, I had a good
cry with it in the car.

A nice little sniffle with
it, and I rubbed some tears,

and I feel, like,
real close to it,

so I think I'm gonna
hold on to it,

if that's all right,
do sort of a...

Quick like a Band-Aid,
I always say.

Good-bye, Chris.

Good-bye, memories of Chris.

Good-bye, love.

Unity Embrace!

Ah, come on, Unity Embrace.

Come on.

Release the pain!

Release the pain!

Shh. I need to release
the pain silently.

There we go. Okay, guys,
you know what I got to do?

I'm gonna go check
on that timer.

I feel like I need to reset it.

No, wait, Will. In
order for the ritual

to be complete, we all have
to stand around the fire

until it burns completely out.

Completely out?

Yeah, the embers burn out,

and our pain disappears
with the smoke!

You know what? I'm sorry.
This is ridiculous.

Hey, hey, you! No!

Get off! What is the
matter with you?

Why can't you take
this seriously?

What is so bloddy important

That you must ruin the sanctity
of the Day of Reflection?

Will.

Too bad you just threw Sam's
sweater into the fire.

Looks like that girl over
there could really use it.

Hi.

Hi.

Um, what the hell is this, Will?

Uh... Uh...

Oh, no, is this your family?

No, no, it's not my family.

Oh, my God, are you in some
sort of weird, pagan cult?

- No, no, no...
- Hey, hey, hey!

We are not a cult.

Please, uh, let me...
Liz, I can explain.

Okay, you know what? I don't
even think I need to hear it.

Thank you, Will, for once
again putting Marcus

and my emotional needs
in the backseat

to one of your vapid
sexual conquests.

- No! You are not a conquest!
- Excuse me?

- You're not a conquest.
- Okay, I don't know

what any of this is,
but it is clearly

some very messy baggage, so...

No, no, it's not. Liz, please!

- I can explain.
- Carry on!

Stop! Don't!

Will, I was really hoping
you were different,

but I guess I was wrong.

I am... I...

Liz!

Thank you.

Thank you for that, Fiona.

Are you guys arguing?
Should I be leaving?

Wait. You're the one
who abandoned me

in my time of need to
hang out with that...

Close your ears, Marcus...

- Strumpet.
- Yeap. Leaving.

She is not a one-night
stand, okay?

She's just a normal girl
looking for a normal guy

without any drama or baggage,

and that's impossible
for me to be

when I'm hanging out
with you and Marcus

burning trash in a yard. I...

Listen, I like her, Fiona.

I like her a lot, okay?

Why didn't you just tell me?

Because you were having
such a hard time

and you're suffering, and I
didn't want to be bragging

about how I was
falling for somebody.

You know, it's like throwing
salt in an open wound.

This is why I didn't
say anything.

These aren't tears
of sadness for me.

They're tears of
happiness for you.

I mean, if love can grow

in the putrid soil of your
tiny fractured heart,

then, you know, maybe
there's hope for me.

This is so...

You know, you should go and tell
Liz how you feel right now.

Well, what about the memory
hole and all that stuff?

Oh, Marcus and I will mourn,

and I've chucked enough
lighter fluid on it.

It'll be burning well
after you get back.

- Go on.
- Okay.

Liz, hey. Can we
go talk somewhere?

I'm working.

Can I have a beer, then?

Listen, it turns out, you know,

I do have a "something,"
and I'm really sorry

I didn't tell you
about it sooner...

That's ten dollars.

Really? No more freebies. Okay.

Look, I'm gonna get this out.

I am so sorry I didn't tell
you about Fiona and Marcus.

They're not something that's
easy to talk about or explain

or even understand,

but they are definitely
my "something."

Their my neighbors.

They're my weird, vegan,
ridiculously codependent neighbors.

Actually, you know, if I'm being
completely honest with you,

they are a little
bit more than that.

My relationship with
them is not something

that I would've ever asked for,

but they've become
this kind of strange,

unexpected part of my life,

and, frankly, they're
important to me.

But the woman, the weird mom...

That relationship is
strictly platonic,

like, violently platonic.

And the little dude
is good for me,

and for a kid whose dad is,
like, a million miles away,

I am, like, really
good for him too.

So, yes, I have a "something."

But so does everybody, right?

Yeah.

I mean, not that I'm
in any place to judge,

but this gentleman to my right

probably has some
issues with alcohol.

Look, Liz...

I am so sorry I didn't
tell you sooner,

but I like you, like,
really like you.

And I would love it if you'd
give me another chance.

Come on. Give it to him.

I can do weird neighbors.

That's definitely
gonna be tested.

Are we sure this guy's okay?

Is he with anybody?

The fire, it's almost out.

This must be what it
feels like to sit Shiva.

I cannot believe it burned
through the entire night,

through the driving
rain, the howling wind.

We definitely should've gone
in during the lightning storm.

That was ridiculous.

This might be the most
stubborn batch of memories

we've ever burned.

It's out.

It's out!

Ah! Ow! What are you doing?

Reveille!

The Day of Reflection is over!

Oh, thank God!

Let the Week of Sorrow begin!

- What? What?
- I'll start sewing the robes.

No, no! No!