A Different World (1987–1993): Season 2, Episode 15 - For She's Only a Bird in a Gilded Cage - full transcript

Whitley's mother is determined to find a boyfriend for her daughter.

£ I know my parents loved me £

£ stand behind me
come what may £

£ I know now that I'm ready £

£ for I finally heard them say £

£ it's a different world £

£ than where you come from £

£ yes, it is now, yeah £

£ here's our chance to make it £

£ and if we focus on our goal £

£ you can dish it,
we can take it £

£ hey, just remember
that you've been told £



£ it's a different world £

£ it's a different world £

£ it's a different world £

£ than where you come from £

£ ooh £

£ than where you come from £

plastic

plastic

paper

metal.

Paper!

Freddie, I realize
that you are recycling

but do you have to wage
the fight against garbage

in this room?



Plastic!

I have never.

Aim that blowtorch
at your own face

you graceless hippo!

Jaleesa

I want all blow dryers
banned from the bathroom.

It's liked being whipped around
by a sirocco in there.

Do you know what hot air

does to your skin?

I know every time
you open your mouth

my face cracks.

Is there anything
you want to throw in here?

Yes, but it's not
big enough to hold her.

Nah.

Must your bed

always look like the sales table
at the salvation army?

Having a rough morning?

Look at this pimple.

It's sitting there
like mount krakatoa

about to erupt on my head!

Your mom is coming today, right?

Yes, Dr. Joyce brothers

but I'm not nervous about that

so save your
psycho-babble breath.

Okay.

When mother sees this eruption,
she'll say

"the only man you'll attract
is a dermatologist."

She'll be too busy
with the board of trustees

to be worried about one pimple.

My mom doesn't give a flying fig

about the hillman
board of trustees.

She's coming here to see
why I'm still an old maid.

Aren't you too young
to be an old maid?

Must I explain
everything to you?

Ever since
cousin candy's wedding

my mother has been on me
like a buzz saw.

"Always a bridesmaid,
never a bride."

She's probably just teasing you.

She paid candy
to throw the bouquet at me.

I would have caught it, too

if marietta Dixon hadn't
stuck her elbow in my eye.

You are not in college
just to catch a man.

I'm not?

Whitley!

I can't help it.

I go along just fine

and then I get around her

and I'm a nine-year-old
in corrective shoes again...

Watching as she mesmerizes
every man on the dance floor.

You are a beautiful girl.

You're on the Dean's list,
head of the arts society.

You're absolutely right.

I've got
to pull myself together.

That's the spirit.

If I can camouflage this bump

maybe somebody will propose
to me before mama gets here.

Ah!

Excellent timing, gentlemen.

Oh, thank you.

Thank you kindly.

Told you to take up
weight lifting.

Mush on, mutley.

Hello there.

Hello, ma'am.

Ron Johnson, at your service.

I'm Marion Gilbert,
whitley's mother.

Holy moly!

Excuse him, ma'am.

Dwayne Wayne.

I could get whitley for you.

Thank you, but
she's expecting me.

I'm sure she'll be right down.

Lettie!

Marion.

Oh, darling

you look wonderful.

And I know what it is.

It's being with
these young people.

In August

instead of going to the spa

I'll camp out here with you.

I'll pitch the tent.

Mama.

Oh, darling, look at you!

You look so adorable.

Mmm, kiss, kiss, kiss.

Oh...

Oh, lettie, thank you for
taking care of my baby.

She does fine
taking care of herself.

In that area, she really does
take after her mother.

Help!

I'm sorry.

I'm recycling.

Did I get soda on you?

No, darling, just on my shoes

but that's all right

because crocodiles
are aquatic animals.

Everything has to be waterproof
around our little Freddie.

I wish we could stay and chat

but we have so much to do
before my meeting.

Marion:
Oh, she's
adorable.

You needn't waste your time

on "tin can Sally."

Mother, please.
I am your daughter.

Kim

this is my mother.

Mother, Kim Reese.

Hi.

Finally.

When whitley said
she was rooming

with the recipient of
the Phyllis wheatley scholarship

I couldn't have
been more pleased.

I always brag about you.

Yes, because to earn
that scholarship

you have to be more than needy.

What mother means...

Kitty knows what I mean.

Certainly.

Oh, ladies, ladies...

This bedspread is positively
at war with those curtains.

Mother, this is Kim's bedspread.

Oh.

Well then, how could
you have known, Carol.

Excuse me, it's Kim.

Isn't that a lovely name?

Thank you.

I have a class.

Nice meeting you.

It was my pleasure.

Whitley, where is she from?

Columbus, Ohio.

Oh, it shows.

Kim's very nice.

Did I say she wasn't?

Darling... ahem... divorce update.

Mother, let's not talk about
daddy and Monica.

I have turned that page.

His love handles
are her problems now.

Now, tell me all about you

and tell me about school.

I'm doing very well.

I've improved so much
in my composition...

Introduction to
public relations?

I thought it would be...

You know all about
public relations.

You've watched me
at dinner parties.

I wanted to use it
for my job this summer.

Your job?

What job?

I've talked to people
at art galleries...

Oh, sweetheart.

Remember how disappointed
you were last summer

when that magazine
turned you down?

Why put yourself
through that again?

There's a chance
that I might get the job.

Of course you might get the job

but we'll be doing
the mediterranean coast

and Hilton head

and everyone is expecting you,
whitley.

I hate to disappoint
everyone, but I...

Phone.

Hello?

Kent?

It's Kent souje!

"Stinky"?

Well, it's great
to hear yours, too.

Really?! I'm so
happy for you.

That sounds lovely.

Three o'clock.

Oh, and mama says hi.

See you then.

Kent souje!

Isn't that a nice surprise?

What is he up to these days?

He just graduated from
Duke medical school

and he's doing his residency
at Howard hospital.

How long has it been
since he's seen you?

Seven years?

Oh, he will just die.

Remember, let him
do all the talking.

Men really do love
a good listener.

Wear something alluring,
but not too much cleavage...

Because "bust before dusk

means your virtue
he cannot trust."

That is my baby.

Before he sees you

we must do something
about that pimple.

It is sitting
in the middle of your face

like mount fuji.

There goes whitley.

I wonder where moms is.

Moms don't look like
no mother I ever seen.

Imagine scraping your knee

and having that woman
kiss your boo-boo.

Oh, Kent, really.

Was I that awful?

My little brothers
called you "the bruiser."

I do remember
hitting one of them... once.

Once?

You gave them all black eyes.

Then you forced them
to marry you.

You wouldn't have
had to force me.

You had a crush on me?

No, I was scared
you'd knock me out.

So what are you studying?
Who are you seeing?

I'd rather hear about you.

Not until you tell me
something about yourself.

I'm majoring in art history.

I'm minoring in French.

Tell me about you.

What are your plans
when you graduate?

What every woman dreams of...

A nice home, the right fella

the pitter-patter
of little feet.

Dogs?

Children, silly.

I always thought
you'd be a banker

an entrepreneur

a prizefighter.

Well, at a time

when a woman is trying to wear
the suspenders in the family

it's my duty to champion
the virtues of the homemaker.

I'm glad to see women
entering the work force.

I could be a working homemaker.

Who would have thought
that that little girl

in braces and corrective shoes

would turn into what I see.

Oh, stinky...

I'm glad your mother warned me
that you were a knockout.

My mother?

When did you talk to her?

She got my number
at your cousin's wedding.

Did she?

She thought it would
be nice for us

to have a reunion.

I think it was a great idea.

Well, there's no end
to my mother's great ideas.

I don't want to hear
about recycling, bicycling

or no other kind of cycling!

Mr. Gaines,
don't you care

about the world you're
leaving to your children?

No!

We're depleting our woodlands.

The Amazon jungle is going fast.

Who knows what will be next?

The redwood forests.

The everglades.

No, no, they not
touching my everglades!

That's where velma and I
will spend our golden years

and they better have fish
when I get down there, too.

There you are.

I've been looking
all over for you two.

Kent, let me
look at you, darling.

Did we ever think
that skinny bookworm

would turn into
such an attractive man?

I'm learning to expect
the unexpected.

Will you come tonight
to my cocktail party

for my board of trustees?

Don't even think
about saying no.

What time should I be there?

Let's say 6:30.

Okay.

I couldn't have asked
for a more perfect evening

if I had planned it myself.

Oh, bye-bye.

One daughter, hefty dowry

no experience necessary,
no reasonable offers refused.

Whitley, you're eating
the paper.

She's not the first mother
to play matchmaker.

I fixed my son up with his wife.

Well, his first wife

why doesn't she
just rent a billboard?

But they were happy
for several months.

That's your second layer.

Good.

I want pimples

little mount fujis
all over my face.

Before you excavate
the third layer of chocolates

why not just tell
your mother how you feel?

I'll just say

"mother, I'm old enough
to make my own decisions."

And she'll say,
"of course, darling.

Now get in there
and pick a veil."

Maybe it's time you told her
you're not ready to get married.

I can't.

You tell her.

Uh-uh.

Oops, sorry.

I'm on my way out.

Tell her.

I'll just have
one of these turtles

before they become extinct.

Kim, it's been too long
since we've been out together.

We've never gone out.

Uh-huh, Thanksgiving.

I don't remember
when I've had so much fun

or so much stuffing.

What do you want?

Would you please come with me
to my mother's cocktail party?

I don't think so.

Why not?

She likes you.

Your mom can't remember my name.

She's like that with everybody.

She called me Willy
till I was ten.

You're on your own, Willy.

Let me put this to you
as delicately as possible.

You owe me.

Mr. Hobson,
by touring Asia

the hillman choir will enhance
the prestige of the school.

Where's that girl
with the shrimp?

Avery Hobson,
you are not locking horns

with a rival corporate lawyer.

This young lady
has begged you long enough

and I am not about to grovel.

Not in this dress.

Shrimp?

How much you need?

Just 2,600...

No, Avery and I like
big, fat round numbers.

Make it an even 5,000.

Don't forget to put happy faces
in all those zeros.

See you later.

How are
my favorite guests doing?

I had no idea that whitley's
roommate was in pre-med.

Oh, yes, we're all
very, very proud of little kiki.

Isn't it Kim?

Thank you.

Oh, Kim, another cheese puff?

Remember, a moment on the lips,
a lifetime on the hips.

You have seen that celery tray
over there, haven't you?

She prefers the hors d'oeuvres
over here.

Do you play tennis, Kim?

Not really.

Kent, you must come to watch
whitley in the doubles in June.

I wear a little skirt
and when I bend over

heaven and earth
will be filled with my glory.

Marion, I'm afraid
I need reinforcements.

Is Dr. Mclurkin still
clutching his checkbook?

I'm afraid so.

Excuse me.

I've been drafted.

Posture, dear.

We are not quasimodo.

Marion, you could charm
the eagle off a dollar.

Oh, Bradford, I am so thankful
that you are on this board.

I was afraid I'd be stuck
with a group of fat, old fogies.

Thank you, but i'm
not exactly on the board.

Oh?

I'm the faculty liaison
to the board.

So you teach?

Yes.

How fulfilling.

Dr. Mclurkin.

Whitley, look what your mother
got for the gospel choir.

That woman is incredible.

I thought I could at least
count on you to be negative.

Excuse me.

Dear, dear, while
you are wandering around

etching frown lines
into your face

Kent is being whisked away

by that roller derby queen.

Mother, I don't feel very well.

Pull yourself together.

I told you...

Would you grab your skates?

My stomach hurts!

That's right, darling.

Go back to the dorm
and lie down.

Mother will come over
in a moment.

Play blue moon or something.

Avery Hobson.

I'm going
to show you all the way...

Hey, whitley.

Where's moms?

That woman wins first place

in the Ron Johnson
miss mother universe pageant.

You like her?

You can have her.

Now what's her problem?

If she had my mother

she'd have something
to complain about.

I like your mom.

She's too tiny to smack you.

What the woman lacks in size
she makes up for in cunning.

Once I forged her signature
on my report card.

When I got home, she said

"Ronald, darling,
I'm in the den."

I walked in.

She jumped out of the corner
and tackled me on the couch.

I can't go anywhere
with my mama.

"This is my boy.

"He's so smart.

"He's been on the honor roll
since kindergarten

"and he got an 800
on his math s.A.T.S.

Count something
for them, chipmunk."

Your mother calls you chipmunk?

Do we have a problem with that?

No.

Joanie wanted
to name me moonbeam.

Joanie?
Joanie?

You call your mother joanie?

Since I was a kid.

She's like my friend.

She never tells me what to do.

Maybe I'd be more together

if she told me
a couple of things.

Mother, I am not
your little marionette.

You can't just
boss me around like this.

I'm an adult.

Whitley.

Mother.

What was that display
at my party?

Avery Hobson must think
I raised you in a pool hall.

I wasn't feeling well.

Why are you so determined
to make me unhappy?

You unhappy?

What about me?

In three years at this school

you haven't found
one man of Kent's caliber.

How dare you just toss him aside
like a pair of old go-go boots.

Kent didn't come here
on his own.

You asked him to come.

Behind my back.

So this is why we're having
this little tantrum.

I set you up with an attractive,
eligible, future doctor

and shame on me.

You made me look like
some desperate

ugly-duckling Princess

from a dime-store novel.

I had to cozy up to that
graceless cow, Louise souje

to pry Kent's number
from her hoof.

I didn't expect a parade.

A thank you

would have sufficed.

I didn't ask you to.

You were too busy
with that public relations book

to see that the opportunities

were slipping
through your fingers.

You may not be worried
about your future, but I am.

That's exactly
what I'm trying to tell you.

You're always telling...

There we go with the you always.

Mother, please!

May I finish?

My whole life has been
sit up straight, fix your hair

smile, don't smile too much,
get that ring before spring.

When do I get to do
what I want to do?

What do you want to do?

I don't actually know.

You don't know.

I'm afraid that's just not
good enough for my daughter.

Now for the good news.

I have managed
to smooth things over with Kent.

You two are playing tennis
in the morning.

So get your beauty sleep.

So I can end up like you?

No husband, no friends

and a daughter who can't
stand to be around you.

I didn't mean that.

Whitley.

I didn't realize that I had made
your life so awful.

It's not awful, mama.

I didn't say that.

I want the best for you.

Don't you see that?

Yes, but you hold on so tight
I can't even breath.

It's funny, whitley

but I always thought
I was a good mother.

You are, mama.

Of course I am.

Because just look
at you, my baby.

Can we have lunch
tomorrow, mama?

Darling, I am lunching
with Avery Hobson tomorrow.

He's a little taken with me.

Oh, of course.

I don't suppose
you'd want to get up early

and have breakfast or anything?

I would love
to have breakfast with you.

Baby, I neglected to tell you

that I did give your number
to a few other young men.

You don't have to go
on a date with them

but perhaps you and Karen

could just take them out
for some coffee.

Mother, her name is Kim.

Kim.

Well, it shouldn't be.

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