7th Heaven (1996–2007): Season 10, Episode 10 - Apple Pie - full transcript

While Eric sneakily prowls for pie, Ruthie tells off Jack, who indignantly rebukes Martin's insinuations as just that, even gets his and Eric's apologies. While Simon can finally just rest, Rose stresses he shouldn't find out her dad's fourth marriage is breaking up, like her ma's third, which is why he sells his house, which she hopes to get for Simon and her. Kevin says Martin needs a good bating, if not paternal then from him, but both basically good boys are actually rather relieved after rolling in the grass letting off steams by fists.

Hey, stranger.

How was
your Thanksgiving?

Oh, hi.

My Thanksgiving
was interesting.

So you thought I was
having Martin's baby?

Did I?

I believe you did.

Yeah, sorry about that.

Looks like that rumor was
only half right.

I owe you an apology
for the half wrong part

and a thank-you

for the Campbell's Labels
for Education project.


let's go out--
a nice dinner somewhere,

tomorrow night,
just the two of us.

We'll talk.


I don't know.

It's just dinner.

And what don't you know?

I still don't know why
Martin tried to keep me

from going
out with you.

I mean, he must have
had some reason,

so even though I can
go out with you,

I think I'd like to find
out what that is first.


I don't know what
Martin's problem is with me,

but since he's about
to become a teenage father,

don't you think it should be
taken into consideration

that he may not be the most
responsible person in the world?

He might not be a reliable
source of information.

What... are you in love
with the guy?

No, I'm not.

We're just friends.

Okay, if he's really
your friend,

I'm sure he at least thinks
he has a legitimate reason

for keeping you from going out
with me, so find out what it is.

Go, find out,
let me know what I've done.

I can't wait to hear.

Must be nice to just
lie around all day.

Semester ended at Thanksgiving,

so now I'm on break
until January.

At least I would be,

if I didn't have to go back
to work tomorrow.

You could have picked me up
at school

so I didn't have
to take the bus.

Yeah, I would have, but
I didn't want to have to get up.

It's not going to hurt you
to take the bus.

I used to take the bus.

I wanted to talk to you.

Did Dad tell you
what Martin told him about Jack?

Yeah, uh, he said
that Jack had this weird thing

about only dating girls
who had never been with a guy,

and then...

he seduces them and then
he never speaks to 'em again.


I thought you knew.

I thought you were
just asking if I knew,

so we could talk
about Jack.

You didn't know?


Hey, look at you,

keeping a plate out
for your dear old dad.

Thanks, I'm starving.

I know why you don't want
me to go out with Jack.

Simon told me.

I asked Martin
to tell you.

Martin didn't tell me;
he told you.

Why didn't
you tell me?

I was hoping to
stay out of it

and just let you decide not
to date Jack all on your own,

you know, if the opportunity
presented itself.

It presented itself.

Jack asked me out,

and after I talked to Simon,
I talked to Jack,

and I don't think Martin knows
what he's talking about.

I'm lost.

Y-You talked to
Martin about Jack?

You didn't talk to
Martin about Jack?

No, I didn't think so,
'cause you haven't talked

to Martin since
Thanksgiving, have you?

I'm not going to go through
this again with you two,

especially during
the holidays.

Talk to Martin, and after
you talk to Martin,

talk to me before you
talk to Jack again.

All right, I will, I promise.

You just can't
let go of the idea

of going out with
Jack, can you?

No, I can't.

Hey, would you be willing
to talk to Jack?

He wants me to call him to
tell him when he can come over--

when, as in what time tonight.

He wants to talk to you.


We want to go out
tomorrow night.

Fine, tell him to come on over.

Thanks, Dad.

Was there any dessert?

Rose, it's my last night here.

I have to get up in the morning
and drive back to school.

I have to go to work tomorrow

and I really, really want
to see you tonight.

I know, but the Realtor
is showing

my parents' house tonight,
and I don't want to be here,

so I told Sandy
we could do something.

On my last night here?

I couldn't just kick her out
for the night.

All right, I get it.

I'm just sorry your parents
are selling that house.

I like that house.

I know, but they've hardly been
out here the past year--

past two years, even.

They just hung onto it
as an investment.

Nice investment.


You know, if you want
to get married now,

it's possible
I could make a case

for them selling it to us
at a good price.

Rose, we are years, years away

from being able to afford
a house like that, if ever.

So when do your parents get
into town?

Oh, didn't I tell you?

They're not coming.

They want to go skiing in
Canada-- Lake Louise, I think.

It's beautiful there.

So you're not going to spend
Christmas with your parents?

Well, they want me to fly up
and go skiing with them,

but I told them
I want to be with you,

and you're working,
so you can't travel.

Well, that's true,

but I was really looking forward
to meeting them.

And they were looking forward
to meeting you, too.

Maybe they'll fly down
after the holidays.

I've got to run.

I'll call you later, okay?

All right.

I'll be here on the couch,
unless, when you and Sandy

get home,
you want me to come over.

Simon, don't be so needy.

It's not an attractive quality
in a man.

I'll talk to you later.

I am so happy to see you.

Ah, it's been way
too long, Rose.

Way too long.


Sorry about telling
Ruthie about Jack.

I-I thought
she knew.

He's coming over.

Yep. Wants to talk to me.


I don't know.

Guess he wants
to convince me

that he's just a good old
red-blooded American boy.

He's too old,
he's too experienced.

He's not the right
guy for Ruthie.

Couldn't you have mentioned
that to your sister

when you were telling her
everything else?

I said I was sorry.

You have any idea what happened
to dessert tonight?

Your mom didn't make dessert?

Apple pie.

Lucy came over
and took what was left of it.

Apple pie?

There's no apple pie
left for me?

I don't think so.

You mind if I borrow
your cell phone?


Want me to...?


Kinkirk residence.

Oh, hi, uh, this is Eric.

Oh, hi, Reverend Camden.

It's Sandy.

Sandy, how are you?

I'm fine.

Hold on a sec, I'll get Lucy.

No, that's okay.

I wasn't really looking
for Lucy or Kevin.

He wants the pie.

I was looking for the rest
of the apple pie.

Still a piece left.

Want Lucy to bring it to you?

Well, that'd be great,
thanks; I appreciate it.

Would you mind taking it to him?

No, I'd be happy to.

Sandy is at Lucy
and Kevin's?

Yeah, she's going
to get Lucy to bring over

the last piece
of apple pie.

You know, I have to
be at work early,

so I think I'm gonna take off
and just drive back tonight.

I'm gonna go get the
rest of my stuff.

And leave your couch?

You wouldn't just be saying
that you're driving

back to school tonight
when you're really thinking

that maybe you'll go over
to Rose's,

then leave from there
in the morning?

No. 'Course not.

I was just going to take
this to Reverend Camden.

I didn't think
about running into you.

I guess I should have.

I was just going to find Ruthie.

She called me.

Well, maybe you could give
Reverend Camden this.

Oh... sure... no problem.

Good night, Martin.

Good night.


Look, if I don't see you again
before the holidays,

I hope you have
a really nice Christmas.

Yeah, okay.

Oh, hi.

What are you doing here?

You called me.

I thought you'd call me back.

Well, you haven't called me
since Thanksgiving,

so I thought I should
just come over.

Oh, okay.

Do you want me to go back home
and call you?

No, that's okay.

So, what's going on?

Nothing much;
I just wanted to talk.

Well, I'm not really
that great at talking.

All right, fine.

Maybe we can start with why you
haven't called me in a week

and why you suddenly decided
to call me tonight.

All right.

I haven't called you in a while

because I'm angry with you
for misleading me

into thinking that we were going
to be more than friends.

So you called me over
to... tell me off.

I didn't tell you to come over.

Right-- you were hoping to
tell me off over the phone.

Why tonight?

Because my dad asked me
to talk to you.

One, I didn't lead you on.

And two, you still
have a crush on me

even though I told
you about Sandy,

and I think that's what you're
really angry about-- Sandy.

Okay, I apologize
for how I reacted

and for screaming at you when
I found out about Sandy, but...

Thank you.
I accept your apology.

But I'm over it,

and I only had a crush on you
because you led me on.

No, I didn't.

Yes, you did.

You knew how I felt about you.

You did, didn't you?

Just say you knew.

You don't have to apologize.

Why do you want me
to say I knew?

Because it's the truth.

And then I won't feel like
the total idiot I felt like

before I realized you knew.

I knew.

You said you wanted me to
say I knew, so I said it.

Yeah, I know, but now
that you've said it,

it just didn't feel as good
as I thought it would.

So, why don't you just go.

And by the way, I told Jack
what you were saying about him,

and he says none of it
is true.


No... W-Wait a minute.

If you weren't expecting
me to come over,

who were you expecting?

You know, thanks
for coming over.

My dad is in the living room,

so why don't you just
drop off the pie,

and let yourself out
the front door.


♪ ♪

I don't understand how you
came to that conclusion.

Meredith told me you tried
something with her.

We went out for almost
three months.

So that gives you the right to
make an unwanted move on her?

I didn't know it was unwanted
until I made it,

and then she said no,
and I took no for an answer.

But you've just been dying
to get back at me

because of Meredith,
haven't you?


So you just came up
with this big lie?

No, I didn't just come up
with a big lie.

Before Meredith there was Becky,
and before that, Debbie,

and before that, Mara.

What about Becky
and Debbie and Mara?

You were with all of them
till you got what you wanted,

then you dumped them.
Isn't that true?

Not exactly, no.


I just don't want Ruthie
to be another name

on your list of conquests.

She's my friend.

She's not always the
best friend to have,

but she's my friend and I care
about what happens to her.

What makes you think I have
a list of conquests?

What makes you think I'm not
just another name on Debbie

or Becky or Mara's
list of conquests?

You know, they weren't exactly
innocent when I met them.

And Debbie dumped me,
for your information.

Not that any of this
is any of your business.

Debbie dumped you?


And I like Debbie.



I just thought
you were going from

one nice girl
to another,

to another,
to another.

I am.

I am looking
for a nice girl.

I'm looking for a girl
who has some interest in life

other than...
sex, to be blunt.


Look, all right,
okay, well...

maybe... I was wrong.

Not maybe.

You were wrong.

All right, I made a mistake.

I'm sorry and
I guess I should

just let the two
of you talk, so...

good night.

Good night.

Good night.

The pie is
sitting right on the counter.

Just walk in, take it and bring
it to me in the living room.

I'll meet you
in the living room.

What counter?

The counter in the middle
of the kitchen.

You mean the table?

No, the counter.

It's right there,
you'll see it.

Just get the pie;
bring it to me.

You need a fork?

No, don't stop for a fork,
just get the pie.


I didn't realize
you were behind me.

Why can't you get the pie
from the kitchen yourself?

'Cause Ruthie is
in the kitchen with Jack.

Aren't you supposed
to talk to Jack?

I will, but, you know,
I need the pie first

for... strength,

for strength and energy.

Okay, once you have
your strength and energy,

I'd like you to have
a conversation

with Simon about Rose.

I want to get everything out
in the open before Christmas.

Should we get the pie?

No, boys, your dad
can get the pie.

Good night, Dad.

Good night and
good luck.


Okay, I don't know
where you are,

but I know you're
not with Sandy.

Which is fine, okay, just--

just call me.


No, no, no problem;
I just forgot my book.

You sure you have
to leave tonight?

I'm sure.

Good night.

Oh, wait, are you gonna
say good-bye to Ruthie?


I was just thinking if you were
gonna go through the kitchen...

No, I'm not gonna get your
apple pie for you, okay?

You can eat it
when you talk to Jack.

I'm gonna talk to Jack.

I just want to be sure Ruthie
has plenty of time with him.

It's a very interesting
discussion they're having.

Was that Rose on the phone?

No, it wasn't.

I was leaving her a message.

Odd that she's not
around tonight.

You know, since this is
your last night here.

She had some things to do.

Some things that
she would lie about?

No, what makes you think
I think she's lying?

Don't you think she's lying?


It's Christmas time, you know.

It's a time of year
when people lie

and they sneak around and
they-they plan surprises.

Oh sure, sure.

It's just the time of year.

Did Rose tell you that
she's with Sandy?

Why don't you just call Sandy?


Oh, because you don't
want Sandy to know

that you think Rose is lying.

He could have said,

"You have a nice
Christmas, too,"

I don't know, something.


No, really, he couldn't have
or he would have.

He wasn't making
a conscious choice

not to say something nice.

He was just reacting

to you suddenly being there
right in front of him.

She was just as
surprised as he was,

and she said something
nice to him.

I know, but Sandy has
been working very hard

on being more aware of
who she is and what she's doing.

She's been making
better choices for herself,

better choices about everything.

Martin's not there yet.

I don't think
he's going to get there

unless someone knocks
some sense into him.

And if that's not going to be
his dad, I want to do it.

No, you don't.

I want to do it.

I just want to punch him.

No, no, you don't.

Neither one of you want
to do anything to harm anyone.

I'm afraid I do.

Yeah, me, too.

I really just want
to deck that guy.

You need a time-out.

Go take a walk.

Get some fresh air.

And forget about Martin.

I can't help it, Luce.

I'm so angry.

I'm so angry
and I'm angry because...

I want Martin to rescue me.

I do.

I do.

I don't care if I
can it alone,

I don't want to.

I want Martin.

And I want him to marry me

and take care of me and...

and our baby.




Yeah, it's me.

Listen, do you have any idea
where Rose is tonight?

Not really, no.

Well, wasn't she supposed to
hang out with you tonight?

No, we talked about it,

but then Lucy and Kevin
invited me over,

so I came over here.



You okay?

Yeah, I'm fine.

It's just that...

I just wanted to tell her that
I'm leaving for school tonight

instead of tomorrow

So call her.

I did call her.

She didn't pick up.

I'll just leave her
a message.

Good night.

You're going to leave
Rose another message?

I'll be going now.

Good night.

Well, don't go
looking for her.

It'll look like
you don't trust her.

I mean,
you already called Sandy.

Having a bad night?

Yeah, I am.

I know.
Sandy's over at our house.

You couldn't even say
"Merry Christmas,"

"Happy Holidays,"
"How are you?"

Something decent to the woman
who's having your baby?

She's been crying
for the past hour.

What were you thinking?

I wasn't thinking.

She just came out of nowhere
and started talking to me,

kind of like you just did.

It's the holiday season.

People are supposed
to be nice to each other.

Your dad's home from Iraq.

It's the first Christmas
you've had with him in years,

you're surrounded by people
who care about you--

you got a lot to be happy about.

On the other hand,
I don't get to be happy

about any of those things

because my life is
basically over at 18.

So... Merry Christmas to me.

Your life isn't over, you moron.

Oh, I see, your wife, who is
supposed to be my friend,

is really not my friend,
she's Sandy's friend.

And so now all of you think
that I'm the moron

that got us
into this situation

instead of that Sandy
is the moron

that got us
into this situation,

which is probably
the real reason she's crying.

I've been thinking about
punching you for months now.

If you do, I'm gonna
punch you back.

Hey, Jack.

Thanks for coming over
to talk to me.

I think that shows
a lot of integrity.

Thank you.

I pretty much overheard
your conversation with Martin,

and... on behalf of me,
and my wife and Simon,

I want to offer you an apology

for maybe being a little too
quick to believe something

that I wanted to believe,

I don't know.


I wanted a reason to keep you
from going out with Ruthie,

but I guess I don't have one.

Other than the one
I had originally, which is,

I think 18 is too old for 16.

But I also think
that my daughter

has excellent judgment,
and I trust her.

And, evidently, I have no reason
not to trust you

if you're telling the truth,

and I admit it sounds
like you are,

so I'm just going
to grab the pie and...

and let you two
make your big plans.

Thanks, Reverend Camden.

Oh, it's just... holiday stuff.

I can't believe
I did that.

I hit you first.

Only because I didn't
have the guts

to hit you first.

Ah. You were just
being polite

and letting me
go first.

By the way, wasn't that
an illegal choke hold?


I can't believe
I did that, either.

My dad's going
to kill me.

No, your dad's probably
going to kill me.

No, Lucy's going
to kill you.

We're going to have to
come up with some excuse.

It's the holidays.


Real good.

Well, I better go home.

Yeah. Me, too.

Good luck with your dad.

Good luck
with Lucy.



look, you may have noticed
that I'm a little frustrated

with the way you've
been treating Sandy.

Just try being a little
nicer, will you?

I can't.

Yeah, you can.

I try, but I can't.

I-I'm really angry with her.

I don't...
I don't want to have a baby.

I don't want to be a father.

Yet, you and Sandy
are going to have a baby,

and you are going
to be a father.

That's not what I want.

You can't always have
what you want.

All you can have is...
what you have.

Just punch me again.

I-I can't take a lecture.

Good night.

I'm glad we talked
everything through.

Me, too.

I wish we'd all
talked sooner, but...

Anyway, good night.


Good night.

I'll see you at school tomorrow.


I'll see you.

Good night, Reverend Camden.


Hey, Ruthie, could I talk to you
for a minute?

Spying on me?

Believe me, no one cares
at this point.

I don't care what that guy did
or what he didn't do.

He looks like a giant
next to you.

You'd look ridiculous
if you dated him.

You know,
I wish I had any respect

for your opinion
on relationships.

Where is Rose?

All by herself

without you
on your last night here?

Now, that's ridiculous.

I mean, that you believe it.

Well, it's getting late.

I better get to bed.

Uh, wait, wait.

My turn.

I happened to notice, uh,
there was no kiss.

Not even a quick one.

Jack just came over to talk,

and it's not like we
were on a date,

and it's not like
I would have kissed him

even if we had been on a date,

especially with the two
of you watching.

All right. If you say so.

Good night.

You didn't change your mind

about dating Jack, did you?

After all that work?
Are you kidding?

No, I didn't.

Good night.

Answer it. You're driving
the poor guy crazy.

I don't want to talk to him
right now.

Rose, really, there's nothing
more to talk about.

This happens to people
all the time.

They fall in love,
they fall out of love.

No, it doesn't happen
all the time,

and I do not want Simon to know.

I'll tell him after he
and I get married...

if he ever needs to know.

I guess Kevin went
on a really long walk.

He's such a good guy.


I want Martin to be Kevin.

No, wait, what I really want...

is, I want to be you.

I want to be safe
and secure and happy.

I want to be a person
that never did drugs,

never smoked pot, never had sex
until I was married.

You may want that,
but to get that,

you'd have to change
what already is,

and I don't think
that's possible.

Look, Sandy,

the people who overcome
the biggest obstacles in life

turn out to be
the most generous, loving,

kind people on Earth

because they know
that everyone has faults

and everyone makes mistakes.

They know, and they accept that
about other people

because they know and accept
that about themselves.

And this is the perfect
time of year

to remember
that no one is perfect.

Not me, not you,

not Martin.

Not even Kevin.



Merry Christmas early.

That's not funny.


Not funny.

But thanks
just the same.

Sandy, it was so good
to see you.

Good night.
Good night.

You really think
hitting anyone

is ever a solution to a problem?

No, but... as they say,
'tis the season.

Rose, you knew this
was going to happen.

You knew this
was coming.

You knew we were going
to sell the house.

You knew I was going
to get divorced.

No, I didn't know.

Not for absolute certain.

Yes, you did.

You knew.

You just didn't
want to believe it.

I still don't want
to believe it.

Dad, it's your
fourth marriage.

You despise Rachel.

I despise all your wives
other than my mother,

but I love this house.

I was thinking.

Maybe Simon and I
could have this house.




He hasn't even paid
for that ring.

And, after knowing
how many marriages

your mother and I
have been through,

I don't know why you're rushing
into a marriage yourself,

especially to a guy neither
your mother nor I have met.

Like either of you could choose
the right husband for me.

You'd like him.

Then, why don't you
introduce him to me?

Because I don't want him to know
that you and mom aren't married.

I don't want him to know
that this is your fourth divorce

and mom's third marriage
is shaky.

Oh, is it?

Yes, it is.

Look, why do you have
to get married?

Why don't you just live
with the guy?

I tried.

That's another reason
the Camdens don't like me.

You know, other than the ring.

I thought, when they found out
that I moved

into Simon's apartment, that
they'd make us get married.

But no, they made me move back
to my apartment.

I don't want to just live with
Simon anyway-- I never did.

I want to marry him,
and I want to marry him

before he finds out
about you and Mom.

Sure you don't want
to spend Christmas with me?

I can still get you
on the flight tonight.


I'm going to spend Christmas
with Simon and the Camdens.


good luck with
that, honey.

I hope your first marriage
is as much fun as mine was.

Hmm. Giving up?


Not going to eat the pie?

Not yet, no.

She's never done anything
like this before.


Oh, she's always let you know

where she is
every single minute?


She always knows where I am.

What's wrong with that?

I trust her.

And she trusts me,
and we trust each other.

I just want to know
where she is.

Eat your pie.

Yes, eat your pie.

Why... why didn't you eat it?

Yeah, why haven't you
eaten your pie?

I was waiting
for my wife.

You asked Luce to save this
for me, didn't you?

I did.

You know, Simon...


Every year during the holidays,
people start focusing

on what they want
rather than what they have.

I mean, this is a...
it's a time of year

for sharing
what you have,

not just getting
what you want.

Did... did you
happen to notice

how absolutely crazy I got
just wanting a piece of pie?

I mean, people who just
want something so badly

that they'll do anything
to get it

can't really be trusted.

What does that little lecture
have to do with me?

I don't want anything.

I just want to know
where Rose is tonight.

And I'm sure she'll tell me.

I think what your dad is trying
to point out is that...

Rose wants you.

She really,

really wants you.

Rose has me.

That she does, but sometimes

when we want something
really badly, once we get it,

it doesn't necessarily
satisfy us for that long.

Are you saying that after trying
to get me to marry her,

that once I actually
do marry her,

Rose might actually not want me?

I'd say that's a possibility,

just based on my 30 years
of family counseling

and years in the ministry.

For me, it's pure intuition,

and there's just something
going on, Simon,

that you don't know about,

and I'm not just talking
about tonight.


Simon, it's me.

Good night, Simon.

We love you.

I forgot
and left my cell phone off.

I'm sorry.
I just got your messages.

That's okay.

It's just that...
Sandy had dinner

with Kevin and Lucy,
and I thought...

Would you believe I never
got out of the house tonight?

Just as I was leaving,
my dad dropped by.

From Canada?

No, silly.

He was on his way
to meet my mom,

and he landed in Los Angeles, so
he drove out and surprised me.

He just left.

And you didn't want to call me?

It's just that
I had so little time with him,

and I really wanted
to have him all to myself.

He'll be back. They both will.

And next time, you'll meet them.

It really wouldn't
have been fair to my mom

for Dad to meet you
and not her, anyway.

You know,
we should all be together,

the four of us,
when you meet them.

All right, it's just that...

Your dad just stopped by?

You didn't know he was coming?

Simon, if we're going
to be married

for the rest of our lives,
we have to trust each other.

I know, but...

You trust me, don't you?

It's not that. It's just...

I love you, Simon.

I love you more
than anyone or anything

I've ever loved in my life.

And I want us to be married soon
and forever.

Rose, are you okay?

I'd be better if I knew

that you loved me as much
as I love you.

I love you, Rose.

I love you so much
that you can tell me

why you didn't really want me
to meet your dad.

I love you, too.

Okay, I'll talk to you
when I get to the car, okay?


You were on the phone
all night?

Our phone?

Yeah, yes, I was.

My battery died.

But you'll be happy to know
that I found out

where Rose was last night
and what she was doing.

And everything's fine.

Actually, everything is better
than I thought it was.

What does that mean?

It means

that Rose's dad isn't married
to Rose's mom.

Rose's dad has been married
four times,

and he's going through a divorce
right now,

which is why
he's selling the house.

And Rose's mom has been married
three times,

and her third marriage
isn't going so well, either.

And you feel so much better

Because now I understand

why Rose is in such a hurry
to get married,

and why she wants our marriage
to work out,

and why she was hiding
her parents from me.

I can trust her.

I can really trust her,

and she can trust me
to love her no matter what.

I came to apologize?

Come on in.

I'm really sorry I got
into that fight with Kevin.

Have you had any breakfast?

Uh, no, but I can
get something on
the way to school.

Come on, I'll make you

Bacon and eggs? Pancakes?

You would make me pancakes?

Sure, I would, even if you think

that I am only Sandy's friend
and I'm not your friend.

Sorry about that, too.

What else are you feeling sorry
about this morning?

I don't know.

Come on, you're sorry
you weren't nicer to Sandy.

I know you, Martin.

You may not want a baby,

but you would never
intentionally hurt anyone.

I guess.

I want you to call Sandy
and apologize to her.

Just tell her you hope
she has a Merry Christmas, too.

You know, I don't... I don't
have to have the pancakes.

Sure you do.

If you need privacy,
you can use the other room.

And you don't think

the long list of divorces
will eventually bother Simon?


In fact, I think he's
going to come around

to getting married sooner.

I don't know how you do it.

How do you always get
what you want,

and I get nothing I want?

It's Martin.


Hey, uh, it's me, Martin.

Look, I-I just want to say
I'm sorry about last night,

and I hope
you have a Merry Christmas, too.


I appreciate that.

I didn't mean
to hurt your feelings.

I just... I just don't want
to have a baby.

I understand.

Okay, well, uh, see ya.

After waiting all these months
for him to call,

he finally called.


And I think

for the first time,
I realize that...

I had casual sex with an
18-year-old high school student

who just... isn't really
what I want after all.

And I have to say
that knowing that,

I suddenly feel quite...



Looking for me?

No, I was just...

avoiding a teacher
that I didn't want to run into.

I see.

So, about tonight...

Yeah, about tonight...

We should probably...


I'm too old for you.
...you're too old for me.

I'm so glad you feel that way.

I was hoping you'd back out.

I think it was the conversation
with Martin that did it.

I felt embarrassed

to be talking about all
that stuff in front of you.

Even though it was all true,

I just didn't want you
to know everything

there was to know about me.

I'm not exactly

proud of sleeping around,

but, well, I'm not exactly
ashamed of it, either.

I mean, I'm a guy.

An older guy
with a lot of experience.

No judgment, really.

It's just that you're...

Too old.

I really appreciate
your being honest,

and talking to Martin,
and talking to my dad.

So, if the offer's
still good to be friends,

I'll take you up on it.

The offer's still good.

And thanks, Ruthie.

Thanks for not
going out with me

just to prove
your dad was wrong.

I don't think
we would have had a good time,

and this conversation
would have just been

even more awkward
than it is now.

The awkward conversation
would be with my dad.

I hate it when he's right.

I'll see you around.

Yeah, see you around, Jack.

If you're looking for Simon,
he went back to school already.

Had to work.

I knew you'd be in here,
waiting for me when I got home.

What made you think that?

Because you couldn't wait
to hear me say

that you were right
and I was wrong.


About Jack.


He's too old for me.

Too old, too experienced.

I'm not going out with him.

Yes, I am.

I am... happy.

You know, I was really hoping
you wouldn't gloat.

You always do that, you know?
You gloat.

I do.

I absolutely do.

And your mom pouts.

And Sam and David don't
always do what I tell them.

And Simon is just blind
when it comes to Rose.

And Lucy still cries
at the drop at a hat.

And Kevin is

And Martin is very stubborn.

And you...

You're at that

eye-rolling stage
that I... detest.

And not one of you
is gonna change

between now and Christmas.

And yet, I'm going to enjoy
my holidays with all of you

because I realize that now.

No expectations,
no disappointments.

I don't want anything
from any of you,

other than for us all

to be together
during the holidays,

and share our time
and our energy

with our own weird
and wonderful family.

I love you, Ruthie.