The Wild Wild West (1965–1969): Season 3, Episode 23 - The Night of the Simian Terror - full transcript

Jim and Arte uncover a secret revenge plot involving inhuman medical experiments.

Get away from that gate.

I got a shotgun
on you. Get away!

There's no need
to be hostile, huh?

Just here to see
Senator Buckley.

Come back in the morning.

Those gates don't
open after sundown.

We're government agents
here on official business.

Now open up this gate.

What's the name?

James West and Artemus Gordon.

Well, nobody said
anything about...

I'll have to see
some identification.

Just who are you?

I'm Senator Buckley's foreman.

Fletcher, anything wrong?

They claim to be
government agents.

They want to see your father.

Show them in.

The senator doesn't
allow guns in the house.

Leave them here, please.

If you gentlemen

would make yourselves
comfortable in the study,

I'll tell father you're here.

Thank you.

She must have meant he
doesn't allow anyone else's guns

in the house.

Now, it looks like
they're getting ready

to make a last stand.

Yeah. Against whom, I wonder.

Mr. West, Mr. Gordon.

Surely President
Grant didn't send you

all the way to
Kansas just to see me.

Oh, no, sir. He was
concerned about your welfare.

It's been such a long time

since the president's
heard from you.

He's anxious to expedite

your return to
Washington, senator.

I won't be able to
go for at least a week.

Why is he badgering me?

Because you happen to
have a national-defense bill

tied up in your committee, sir.

Oh, yes.

Well, gentlemen, you may
tell the president that I...

Senator, you tell the president.

Look, sir, if you're

in some kind of difficulty,
we'd be glad to help.

No difficulties.

None whatever.

Fletcher, who did this to you?

It... It...


I-it was...

What's going on here?

And who are you?

My name is James West.

Well, then you're one of
the Secret Service people.

That's right.

What did that to him?

I don't know.

Better get some
blankets for this man.

Go get some blankets,
something to carry him on.

Then, sir, you didn't see it.

No, I just saw a
shadow over there.

I wish I'd been here.

This is my brother
Benjamin, Mr. West.

I wouldn't have been afraid
to take on whatever it was.

You may get that
opportunity, sir.

I'm Aaron Buckley.
This is my brother Caleb.

Sorry we couldn't have met
under happier circumstances.

If we don't get a
doctor for this man,

he may not need one.

Yeah, you're quite right.
Caleb, you better go...

While you're getting the doctor,

I'm gonna look for that shadow.

I'd rather you didn't.

Well, it could be
dangerous, Mr. West.

Uh, I'll have some of
the men take a look later.

Mr. Buckley, that's my job.

Caleb, you'd better
go for Dr. Liebig.

You shouldn't have let West go.

Suppose he finds
what's out there.

I tried to stop him.

You should have
given me a sign, Aaron.

I could have stopped
him soon enough.

Would you? How?

There are ways.

All right, round up some
of the men and go after him.

I won't need any help.
Take them, anyway.

You don't know what you
might run into out there.

Is he badly hurt?

He's crushed.

Funny, he wasn't
beaten, he didn't fall.

He's just literally crushed.

What could do a
thing like that, senator?

I have no idea.

How could I know what it was?

What was he guarding
you from, senator?

Jim and I noticed it
the minute we got here:

armed sentries with
dogs, guns everywhere,

the entire place barricaded.

What is it? What's
goin' on here, senator?

Fletcher, can you hear me?

Can you hear me?

What is it? What
happened out there?

What'd you find?



Mr. Gordon,

could you understand him?

He said he was attacked by...

Attacked by what?

A strange enormous beast

of some kind.

That's ridiculous.

Mr. West.

Mr. West, you're
wanted back at the house.

Well, did something else happen?

Not that I've heard.

Well, then there's no hurry.

Oh, yes, there is.

You see, Mr. West,

we're all afraid something
might happen to you

alone out here in the dark.

Now that you're all here,
I'm sure I'll be all right.

Well, that just all depends.

On what?

On whether you do like I say

and tippytoe back to the house.

You sure you got
your orders straight?

Now look here, Mr. West.

What did Aaron tell you
to do if I didn't wanna go

back to the house?
He didn't say.

I guess he thought
we could persuade you.

Bring him.

Where is he? Where did he go?


Don't try to get up.

You may be seriously injured.

It's James West.
Are you a doctor?

That's right.

There's someone that needs you

at the Buckley
manor worse than I do.

Ja, so I understand.

You can ride back
with us, Mr. West.

Thank you.

Was he ever conscious?


Just long enough to
say he'd been attacked

by some strange enormous beast.

Unlike any beast I've
ever seen in Kansas.

Well, then it had
to be a man, Jim.

No. Whatever it
was, it wasn't a man.

It wasn't human.

Not man or beast?
What does that leave?

Artie, I don't know.

All I know is Fletcher hit it.

I followed it up to
the hills and the ruins

and lost the tracks.

Oh. We can pick that
up tomorrow morning.

Not if the Buckley family
has anything to do about it.

Listen, I don't get that.

What do you think
they have to hide?

I have no id...

What happened to this man?

Oh, uh, he thought he was

attacked by some enormous beast.

So does Mr. West.

Oh, that is delirium.

More than a possibility.

Anyway, doctor, we'd like to
ask this man some questions

as soon as you
think it's advisable.

You may ask any
questions you like,

but there will be no answers.

He is dead.

His injuries were massive.

Nothing could have saved him.

Uh, from the color of the eyes,

I'd say that he had a
ruptured spleen, doctor.

Oh, doctor, I'm sorry. I didn't
introduce you to my associate.

This is Artemus Gordon.
This is Sigmund Von Liebig.

Your servant, sir.


Don't I know that name?

I can see no reason
why you should.


Sigmund Von Liebig?

What about him?

I-I know that name
from somewhere.

I just can't think of where.

Well, Artie, when you remember,
why don't you let me know, hm?

Let's go see the senator.


Dr. Liebig just told me.

Poor Fletcher.

Where's your father?

In the study with Dr. Lieb...

Oh. Oh, but I'm
a terrible hostess.

Here you've had
a long cold trip,

and I haven't... No,
thanks, Miss Buckley.

We'd like to see your father.

Let me show you to your rooms.

No, thank you. A hot meal?

Miss Buckley, it
sounds like you're trying

to keep us from him.

Those were my orders.

He and the boys
are in family caucus.

Let me show you to your rooms.

Yes, gentlemen?

Oh, we'd like to
talk to your father.

That's out of the question.

I'm sorry, Mr. West.

My father's not a young man.

Fletcher's death was
a great shock to him.

He is to talk to no
one till morning.

Oh, will he be any
better in the morning?

We'll have to wait and see.

And now if you'll excuse us.

We're gonna have to find
out what's goin' on in there.

You know that.

Mm-hm. We're gonna
have to do it another way.

We're all yours
now, Miss Buckley.

Oh, thank you.

Um, look, how come
you aren't in there?

Aren't you family?

I'm adopted,

and a ward hasn't
much status in this family.

Oh, the boys are
rather clannish, huh?

No more than you'd
expect of triplets.


I didn't think they resembled
one another that much.

Must have been very
useful to the senator

for political reasons,
though, huh?

Where's that lead?

Why do you ask?

Well, you see, I...
I walk in my sleep.

He knows that very well.

I wouldn't wanna get
into the wrong room.

That is the wrong room.

It was the boys' nursery.

No one goes in there.

No one.

Well, of course, Miss Buckley.

Thank you very
much for telling us.


Naomi. "My sweetness."

That's what "Naomi" means
in Hebrew. You know that?

Really? GORDON: Mm-hm.

What does Artemus mean?

It means, uh, "He
who wastes little time."

This is your room, gentlemen.

Whenever you're
ready, come downstairs,

and I'll have a
hot meal for you.

Oh, I don't think I should, no.

Every time I eat late,
I walk in my sleep.

Why don't you go ahead, Jim?

Uh, shall we, Miss Buckley?

Well, have you seen enough?

If you didn't believe it before,

what happened here tonight

ought to convince all of you.

I just can't believe...

We were all together,
all together tonight.

And but for the grace of
Fletcher being out there,

we'd have all been wiped
out to the last Buckley.

The last known one, anyhow.

Father, we can't
just sit here and wait.

I just can't believe...

We'll all be slaughtered.
You don't want that, do you?


No, Aaron, of course I don't.

Then give us your permission

to stop it.

I'm so weary. I...

I have to think.

Give me a little time.

Time is running out, Father,

for all of us.

What do you want to do?

It's kill...

or be killed.

There has to be another way.

What do you
suggest? Negotiations?

Sweet reason? A peace treaty?

Look, you can't reason
with... With that thing.

There's gonna be a bloodbath.
Now what are you gonna do?

Why do you ask me?

You've already
made up your mind.

All you want now is
for me to sanction it.

Well, that I refuse to do.

I'm going to bed now.

I think the old man
has lost his grip.

It's up to us now.

You mean it's up to me.

You keep assuring us

you're not afraid of... it.

I'm afraid of nothing.

Then kill it.

Once it's done,

the Buckley
secret is safe again.

I wonder. There'll
be an investigation.

No one will talk. There
must be records somewhere.

None that I know
of. In the church.

Of course.

The history of
the Buckley family

for the past 200 years

is in the church records.

Then we'll destroy them.


All right. In the morning.

Not in the morning.
Tonight, Benjamin.

You'll go to the
church right now.

Please, I'd like to take
this up to Mr. Gordon.

I'm sure he's famished. If
Mr. Gordon were hungry,

he'd come down and
get something to eat.

Thank you.


You didn't get that
walking in your sleep.

No, no. I... I just woke up.

There was something
I had to tell you.

Artie, what is it?

I can't remember.

It was something...

Wait a minute,
somebody went out.

The senator. No, no, no.

Uh, somebody...


Benjamin went out.

I must have been hit
even harder than I thought.


That's what it was.

They sent him for some records.


Who did they send?

They sent Benjamin.



I-I can't seem to
remember. I don't know.




No. No, Dimas. No!

Um, A-Artie,

I think that's
enough to think on.

Now, uh, where did he go?

I don't know. Must be somewhere
where they keep the records.


What's that?

Church bells.

Why would they be ringing
the church bells at midnight?


That's where they sent him, Jim,

is to the church.



West, you can't go out there!

Have the men get the
rest of the shotguns.

I must protest

this desecration.

Who are you?

I'm Reverend Hastings.

I was awakened by somebody
ringing my church bell.

Good heavens. What
happened to that man? Who is it?

It's Benjamin Buckley,
and he was crushed to death

just like the Buckley caretaker.

God have mercy on us.

Did you see it?

See what?

Over there, by the
edge of the woods.

It looked like a...

Well, reverend,
what did you see?

Well, now, that's impossible.

It must have been the lightning,

or perhaps my
mind is playing tricks.

Reverend, what was it?

Well, it looked like a...

Now, please don't scoff,

but it looked like a giant ape.

It's always cold in this house.


Everything quiet for a change?

Well, the senator's sleeping.
I can't vouch for the others.

You know, Artie,
we can't leave here

until we square this thing away.

Well, of course not,

since Senator Buckley
wouldn't be any good to anyone

in Washington, anyway,
not in this condition.

You get anything out of him?

No, he wouldn't tell me a thing.

He obviously wants to
take the Buckley secret

to the grave with him,
and he probably might.


about this big,
giant ape of yours...

Artie, I wasn't the
only one to see the ape.

Reverend Hastings
saw it too, you know.

Well, I was just doing a
little bit of research, that's all.

You remember my telling
you that the name "Liebig"

had a familiar ring to it?

Stain's International

Right. Listen to this.

"Von Liebig, Sigmund
Gerhard Maria.

"Born 1809,
Schweinfurt, Germany.

"Educated at the
University of Heidelberg.

"Lectured for three years
at the University of Zurich.

Now, get this:

"Well-known naturalist,

and the author of

"On the Nature of the
Ape and His Environment

and The Journal of Ape Culture."

Is that all, Artie?

Is that all? What
more do you need?

I mean, the man's
an authority on apes.

He's probably conducted
experiments with them.

He might even have
one around right now.

Artie, I had a hunch

there was an ape
around here somewhere.

Good logic.

The question is, what's it
got to do with the Buckleys?

I'm going over to
talk to this man.

Hey, Artie,

he won't talk to you.

Of course he won't talk to me,

but he might talk to
another anthropologist.

Like Dr. Marvin Gentry.

"Dr. Marvin Gentry,

Museum, St. Louis."

Quite right.


Yeah, yeah, I know your museum,

but I have never heard of you.

Oh, but we've
heard of you, doctor.

Oh, yes, indeed.

Y-your fame is widespread

all up and down the
length and breadth

of St. Louis.

As a matter of fact,
the library has...

Has two copies of your book.

Ja. Which book?

On the Nature of Ape and
His Environment, of course.

Masterly thesis,
sir. Just masterly.

Nonsense. It is nothing but
the maunderings of youth.

Oh, no. No, not at all.

It is full of errors, a
discredited series.

I prefer to drop the subject.

You can't mean you've abandoned
your experiments with the apes?

Certainly. I-I am now

simply a country doctor.

Oh, no.

It's not only a great blow
to the world of anthropology,

but it completely
knocks over my theory.

You see, I was certain...

I am sorry, Dr. Gentry,
but I no longer have any...

I no longer have any
interest in the subject.

I am sorry. I do not wish
to be uncivil, Dr. Gentry,

but I have a very busy morning.

Naturally, I'd be
delighted to stay

and help you with your work.

Ja? Well, I have to attend
a funeral this morning.

If that is to your taste,
by all means, come along.

Oh, good heavens, no.

Uh, not even f-f-for science.

No. No, uh, thank you, doctor.

Good day to you, doctor.

Why don't you go in there
and sit down and rest?

You'll be all right.

I'll go with you, Naomi.

"Felis magna dentata.

One million B.C."

You can get a stiff neck
staring around like that.

Oh, hello.

I'm frightfully sorry.

I didn't know there
was anybody home.

G-Gentry is the name.
Dr. Marvin Gentry,

St. Louis Anthropological...

Uh, Dr. Liebig has

quite a remarkable little
museum here, doesn't he?

I've been writing it up
for our, uh, germinal...

Journal. Heh-heh.

Uh, I'd very much
like to mention you, uh,

but how do you spell your name?

The doctor allows nobody here.

Yes, I... I know, I
know. So he told me.

I thought it was
most, uh, kind of him

to have given me
the run of the place.

Well... Ahem.

I've had my run,

so why don't I just
run along here?

That's a...

That's a very interesting head,

uh, you have there on
that skeleton, you know.

You, uh, turn the
head, and it, uh...

Well, you probably know
about that, don't you? Heh-heh.

What's that, another gadget?

What happens
when you twist that?

I see. It comes out of the wall.

Uh, look, old boy,
can't we, uh, please

just talk this over man to men?

Uh, keep away from me.

Can't we talk this
over, please? Just...

You come one step closer,

and I'll misspell your name.

Though I walked
through the valley

of the shadow of death,

I fear no evil for
thou art with me.

Thy rod and thy
staff, they comfort me.

Earth to earth, ashes to ashes,

dust to dust...

Liebig's been
here for 20 minutes.

Yeah, I know, I've
been conducting

a sort of an interview
with his assistant.

As a result, I can
tell you categorically,

there may be no apes in
Kansas, but there sure is a person

who looks an awful lot like one.


Liebig's assistant.

I tell you, Jim, that's
the biggest meanest hulk

since the woolly mammoth.

Where'd you meet this monster?

He came up out of the
cellar through a trick door

in Liebig's office.


my friend's gone away.

Naomi? She was with
you. Where'd she go?

She went away with a big monkey.

A...? With a what?

They went into the woods.

I wanted to come to,

but I couldn't keep up.

Now... Now, just a minute, dear.

Don't you really mean
a very large man?

No. He was a monkey
with long fur and big teeth.

He picked Naomi up
and gave her a ride.

Uh, Artie, does that sound
like Liebig's assistant to you?

No, it doesn't. It
sounds like a giant ape.

There must be
some trail to follow.

Keep an eye on the senator, huh?


Men! Men, we don't
know what's out there,

but we do know it's deadly.

It's killed two people
already, and nobody...

Nobody here's safe

as long as that beast is
roaming this countryside!

Kill it! Shoot it on sight!

Come on! I want to kill it!

All right! Let's go!

That's a lynch mob out there.

All they'll do is stumble
around in the dark

shooting up livestock.

You've got to
stop them, senator.

What can I do?

Tell me who's trying
to kill the Buckleys.

It's too late. Nothing
can be done now.

Nothing can be done by that mob,

but Jim and I
might stop this thing.

West? Yes.

For all we know, he's dead too.

Why did you come?

It was my plan that the
Buckleys would try and save her.

Naomi, you were bait

to lure the Buckleys here. Why?

So I could kill them all.

Now I'll have to go to them.

Tonight, the job
will be finished.

W-why do you wanna kill the...?

The whole Buckley family?

You'll have time to
figure that out for yourself.

I don't think you
can get out of here,

but if you do, he'll kill you.

He does anything I tell him.

You've got to stop him!

You've got to stop him!

Senator, who was Dimas Buckley?

Where did you hear that name?

It touched a nerve, didn't it?

Aaron sent Benjamin
to the church last night

in order to destroy
some records,

but I think he overlooked yours
right here in the family Bible.

Is this your secret, senator?

"Born to Martha Elizabeth
and Seth Buckley,

"January 20th, 1845,

"Sons Benjamin,

Aaron, Caleb...

and Dimas."

Not triplets.


I half expected
as much last night

when I was in that nursery.

I saw three cribs,
three bureaus,

three sets of everything,

and the faded-out line of
a fourth on the wallpaper.

It belonged to Dimas, didn't it?


Where is he?

He died.


It's all there in the records.

If you go to the cemetery,
you'll find the grave.

Who signed his
death certificate?

I did,

Mr. Gordon.

Dr. Liebig.

Yes, I was expecting
you to show up,

perhaps with your ape.

Ah, but I told you.

That there are no
apes in Kansas?

Yes, I know you did.

Unfortunately, one has
been seen in broad daylight.

Now, as an authority on apes...

How would you explain that,


Mmm. Yeah.

I am beginning to see.

Very well, Mr. Gentry

or Mr. Whatever-Your-Name-Is.

You are right.

Say nothing more, Liebig.

It is too late for evasiveness.

Ja, there is an ape.

I raised it from a little baby,

and I trained it to
prove my thesis,

that given the same
environment as man,

an ape can attain

the same degree of
human development.

Not a very successful
experiment, was it?


No, I must admit that

I can no longer control Johann.

It's no use.

Stay calm and we'll get out.

I just about got
this lock picked.

Even if you do
get out, he'll kill us!

When I walk across this cage,

you open up the cage door.

Cover me for a minute
so the ape can't see me.

Stay there.

All right, cross over.

You gave Liebig one of your sons

for an experiment?

Not for that reason.

You see, Dimas was different.

Within several
months of his birth,

you could tell that he...

Well, he was different
from his brothers.

I... I thought maybe
Liebig could help him.

And a son like that would
be a liability to a politician,

wouldn't it, senator?

That had no bearing
on the decision.

Didn't it?

Then why a fake
death certificate?

Why a tombstone
over an empty grave?

Now you know the Buckley secret.

All right, the important
thing is does Dimas?

Yes, he discovered who he was,
and he demanded his birthright.

How could I acknowledge him now?

Don't you see?

He's set out to take it all:

the name, the lands,

the fortune.

All he has to do is wipe
out the last of the Buckleys,

and he's got Johann
to blame for it.

No, I can't! I can't!

Get up!


I didn't hear you
come back. I...

Jim, we heard
something up there.

It's not the ape.

He's on the loose,
and he's outside, Artie.

Take those people in
the study and guard them.

Right, while you check that.




Men, over here!

It's over here!

My son.


my son.

What did I do to him?

What did I do?