iZombie (2015–…): Season 3, Episode 8 - Eat a Knievel - full transcript

Previously on izombie...

Justin asked
my permission to court you.

I know one foolproof test
to tell if they're zombies.

Check their heart rate.

Me and my fellow travelers.

We are well-armed,
and we're taking the war
to them.

What's your business here?

Blood pressure cuff.

You ran over that fella!

-Go, go!
-I'm going!

Faster!



Yes!

As of today, all your clients
belong to us.

Your dad wanted me
to deliver a message.

Ow!

The latest
poll numbers in Seattle's
mayoral race show

district attorney
Floyd baracus trailing
by 10 points...

What... what happened to you?

Two requests.

Say yes to both or
i blow your brains out.

First, you're gonna show me
where your new brain suppliers
are headquartered.

I can do that.

What else?

Our zombie truther friend,
Harley Johns, posted that
footage on YouTube last night.

How many views?



Almost 1,000.

There's no way we could've
avoided this little
anti-zombie recruitment video?

We had the drop on them.

-But then they ran over
Justin, and...
-And you let them get away.

It's my fault.

I shouldn't have let
myself get run over.

They protected
baracus from harm.

That was their assignment.

The enemy gained intel.

They've released
documented proof of the
existence of zombies.

It's only proof
if people believe it.

So far, the comments
seem to suggest they don't.

It certainly looks like
these guys are responsible
for the tuttle-Reid murders.

Harley Johns and his
three brothers are still
our prime suspects,

but we don't have enough
solid evidence yet.

Plus, a few hundred people
posted on their
anti-zombie message board.

Any of them could have
killed Wally's family.

I propose we handle
this in-house.

Down, boy.

Bright side, our mayoral
candidate is still among
the nearly living.

And I've got a good feeling
about clive and Liv.

That they're gonna catch
the bad guy or bad guys,

and we will all be able to
sleep soundly.

That's it. Meeting adjourned.

You, stay put.

Major lilywhite!

Talk about a big-league debut!

Pinned down in qumar.

Your lieutenant dead.

And you clear a rooftop
of enemy snipers?

Your rookie card is gonna be
a collector's item!

And all those heroics while
taking multiple stab wounds
to the stomach.

You know what that shows me?

That there's no such thing
as abs of steel?

Look at you.
Joking around.

No PTSD.

What it shows me
is you're the same major
who went to qumar.

You are, aren't you?

The same major?

Actually, I came back
more committed than ever.

I love it!

I want to shake
your hand, soldier.

I hope this isn't
too personal, but...

Is that a human pulse
I'm feeling

or are you just happy
to see me?

What? I don't...

Vivian, your chopper is ready.

Thank you.

The problem is, when you do
so well in qumar

and you fail back home,
people notice.

I was out there during
the debriefing wondering

how did our new star soldier
let that zombie-murdering
hick escape.

Everything was happening
so fast.

Not too fast for a zombie.

How is it that
you are no longer one?

Major...

Tell me.

You can't
kill me, I can't die.

You can't
kill me, I can't die.

Unless you
shoot me in the eye.

Unless you
shoot me in the eye.

Sound off.
One, two.

Sound off.
Three, four.

So, did she promote you?

Do we get to start calling
you major major?

She knows I'm human.

She's taking me off
active duty.

Maybe I can talk to her.

It'll have to wait.

She and fortesan are heading
out to zombie island.

She wants to talk to ravi
about how I was cured
when she gets back.

Ravi isn't going to...

Oh, my god.

The federal aviation
administration has declared

that the crash was caused
by mechanical failure...

Mechanical failure, my ass.

This is another attack
on zombies.

We don't know that yet.

Clive, Harley and his people
are targeting zombies.

These murders
are all connected.

Don't you think
it seems a bit advanced
for Harley Johns

and his band
of zombie truthers?

If they know that
Fillmore-graves is
a zombie organization,

they're not bragging about it.

No mentions of the crash
on the message boards.

Any idea who's going to be
in charge of the world's only
zombie military force now?

Uh, the scuttlebutt is
Vivian's brother-in-law,

chase graves, is flying
back from tripoli to
take the reins.

Well, let's try to have
some answers
for him when he gets here.

According to their message
board, our zombie truthers

are gathering this Saturday
at Harley's gun range.

All the diehards
will be there.

If we want answers,
that's a good place to start.

Harley's met me and Liv.

He knows we're investigating
zombie murders.

And I doubt
they'd be too cuddly

with the guy who sprung
zombies out of
Max rager's basement.

Harley hasn't met me.

If I spray tan and throw
on a wig, Harley would
never recognize me.

I could go with ravi.

If they decide
you're infiltrators,
not true believers,

they won't play nice.

You sure you're up for this?

Yep.

Um, clearly.

Very.

Have no fear, America.

Your boy Finn vincible
is back.

And I have a special treat
for you suckers.

I'm going deep here, yo.

You've seen me
tweeze and lemon juice
my happy trail.

Drive a nail through
the webbing between my toes.

But this right here,

is about the kind of pain
that never goes away.

First love, baby.

Yo. Taryn!

Uh... what's going on here?

Where's Taryn at?

She lives here, right?

Finn? What the hell
are you doing here?

You know these guys?

Taryn, Halloween night, 2004.

You wanted to go
on the haunted hayride.

But I got drunk and yacked
easy Mac all over you.

Then you pretty much
dumped me.

Biggest mistake of my life.

But, tonight, I'm here
to win you back.

Excuse me?

Finn, this is my husband.

For the time being.

Check it!

I promised you
a haunted hayride.

So, tonight,
I'm gonna deliver.

You gonna make like
hay and bail?

Never!

In high school, Taryn said,
if I kept acting like a fool
I'd get nowhere in life.

Well, baby, my 22 sponsors
beg to mother flippin' differ.

Thanks, Rudy!

Don't try this at home!

Stop rolling! Shut it off!

Clive:
Watch your back, please.
Thank you.

Clear the path, please.
Thank you.

What's with the audience?

Distraught fans
of Finn "vincible."

He and his stunt-slash-prank
crew are stars of the hit web
series stunted growth.

When I need a laugh,

I go
on their YouTube page

and watch them puke
in a stranger's soup

or smack each other with fish.

It's hilarious.

To each his own, I guess.

Twenty-three
million subscribers
can't be wrong.

So, this guy jumps through
a flaming hoop dressed
like a scarecrow

and burns to death?

I didn't get called here
to present a Darwin award.

How's this murder?

A uni found this stuffed in
a trash bin up the street.

Observe.

The theory is that someone
pulled a switcheroo.

Hey! Excuse me!

Rudy pooh! Oh, my god!

Where'd you get that?
I need to see it.

-Sorry, police evidence.
-Please, can you just
show me the liner?

Oh, my god.

That's the suit I made.

It's lined
with vermiculite, see?

That's the material
stunt men use.

I sewed it in myself.

That's the suit Finn
was supposed to wear.

How many suits did you make?

Just the one.

Finn would've been fine
wearing that.

You see the gleam on it?

That means it was treated
with flame retardant spray.

You sprayed it yourself?

Well, no.

The guys are like skydivers
who pack their own chutes.

Finn would've been
the one to spray it.

"The guys"?
Aren't you part of the show?

No... technically, he's crew,

but he appears
in loads of episodes.

Any idea who could have
made that other suit?

You're asking me
who would've wanted Finn dead?

You've seen the show.
Finn pissed off
a lot of people,

But everyone who worked
on the show loved him.

He was a genius.

We're still talking about
the guy who jumped through
a fire ring in a hay suit?

A guy who pulled himself
up from nothing and
built an empire.

He was...

-Can I just have a minute?
-Of course.

Where there are empires,
there are people
fighting over money.

Let's bring Finn's co-stars
in for a chat.

So, who's hungry
for some barbecue?

No. We've got it.

Don't...
Don't trouble yourself.

Check it out!

We got regulars.

We're the kinda place where...

yeah.

Actually, I don't know
their names.

I think it's like
private corporal something,
i guess.

Those men are military?

Uh, they're...
Private military.

Fillmore-graves.

Fillmore-graves?

The fortune 500 pmc with ties
to multinational affairs has
zombies in its ranks?

Word is they're all zombies.

You don't say.

Are you having a vision?

Oh, I've got a vision,
all right.

I've seen the future.

And the future is brains.

Did you eat Steve Jobs' brain?

'Cause you are straight up
power trippin' right now.

"The future is brains"?
We're the only zombie bar
in the universe,

and we're only doing so-so.

There is a reason why
some men achieve greatness,

and some, like you,
are destined to serve
those great men.

Get me a club soda
with lime, please.

The stunted growth
guys are here.

They pickpocketed
officer Jones' taser gun,

and one of them shot
the other in the face.

Was he all...

No.

Lame.

I put them in
interrogation for a time out.

They're trashed.

Came straight
from Finn's wake.

That's my stapler.

Dude.

I got this.

Hey, hey, hey!

Come on.

It's all good, rooster.
Just breathe through it.

She's got
a steady hand, man.
Fear not.

What the hell
are you doing?

Hang on a sec,
I'm just stapling
this guy's tongue.

This is a police
interrogation room.

All right, we'll just
bang out these questions

and then staple
rooster's tongue after.

Yeah.

I told you I got this.

Sorry for your loss.

I see you guys
are taking it hard.

Laugh the pain away.
That's what Finn
always said, huh?

He was balls
to the wall, man.

-To Finn.
-You can't drink in here.

-Boo.
-Lame, man.

I need you guys to focus up.

Is there anybody you know

who might have had it out
for your pal Finn?

I don't know, man.
We piss off a lot of folks.

-Like who?
-Everyone.

Yeah.

Pretty much.

Hey, yo. What about Kong?

Nah. Kong's cool.

-Who's Kong?
-He's our camera dude.
But ad's tripping.

Kong loved Finn.

Yeah, but what about, like,
that one time?

We signed a non-disclosure
agreement, ass clown.

Sorry, man.

They were like real specific.

Baracus:
The time for talk is over.

Seattle needs a mayor
who will make things happen.

I'm Floyd baracus,
and I approve this message.

Cut! That's a wrap.

Mr. Kong? Clive babineaux,
Seattle pd.

Yeah.

We're investigating the murder
of your employer,
Finn "vincible."

We have reason to believe
the stunt that killed him
was rigged.

Yeah. And Finn's buddies
told us all about your
beef with Finn.

Yeah?

What'd they tell you?

Like super gnarly stuff.

That's what I thought.

They didn't tell you anything
for the same reason
I'm not gonna.

I signed an nda.

Sorry I can't help you.

What the hell was that?

The plan was to subtly imply

the stunted growth guys
were already talking.

That wasn't subtle?

We're done with
the trim outside.

Careful there.

Almost added another
stain to those overalls.

I think you might have.

Check it out.

We got a grand opening gift
basket from the Seattle
chamber of commerce.

That is one big-ass prune.

That's a fig, dumbass.

Make yourself useful.
Fix me a white Russian.

You'll see
growth projections on page 13

of your prospectus.

What the hell?

I didn't get an invitation
to this sausage party
in my office.

Leave whatever
that is and go.

I mean, you can use my office
if you need it,

but it would've
been nice if you asked.

Shoo. The men
are talking now.

Our needs have evolved.

So, too, will the needs
of countless more.

With your investment capital,

we'll be able to acquire
more hospitals, increasing
our inventory for wider,

even global distribution.

Man:
How much investment capital
are you talking about?

Glad you asked.

Clive, you have to see this.

Rudy just got kicked in the
nuggets so hard, he hurled.

This is what you
call research?

No. Wait, is that
what we're doing?

Surprised it took this long
for Finn to get murdered.

Boohoo, Rudy pooh!

What the hell is
wrong with you?

You've gotta have everything?

Are you filming this?

You're sick, dude.

You're a sick man!

Did you see something?

I think I caught the tail-end
of one of Finn's pranks
on Rudy.

Aw. Lucky.

This wasn't funny.

Rudy was in tears.

Whatever Finn did to him
must've been pretty awful.

When Rudy realized
Finn was filming him,
he lost it.

So, there should be footage
we can search for?
What else did you see?

Why you gotta ask
so many questions, man?

It's an interrogation.

That's kind of the point.

- We pranked Rudy
a bajillion times.

And you're asking us
to remember one specific time.

It was in a hotel room.

Rudy was sobbing and screaming
at Finn, asking him why he has
to have everything.

How do you know about that?

We weren't able to find any
footage of the prank online.

We were hoping
you could fill us in.

What did Finn do to Rudy?

Put super lice
in his underwear?

Beehive in his car?

Filled his Boston cream
donut with...

Liv, how about
we let them tell us?

We don't know.
We weren't there.

And Finn deleted that footage.
Said it wasn't funny.

Too raw.

Can we go now?

We gotta film our tribute
for Finn.

You wanna honor your friend?

Then help us find his killer.

Wish we could help you out.

Lame.

We have to go back to Rudy
and ask him what happened
between him and Finn.

Next time you let me bring
a cattle prod.

We'll get answers.

Hey.

I only have a second to talk.

I lied to the guys and said
i had to yak up last night's
purple drink.

-So, talk.
-That prank on Rudy that
you asked about?

We never used the footage.

But our editor sent us
a link to the cut.

Thing you gotta know
going in,

Rudy's never had
much luck with the girls.

Torrent downloaded from RARBG

Oh, my god!

-What the hell!
-Rudy!

No, no, no.
This can't be happening.

-Rudy, baby, don't freak out!
-Yes!

Boohoo, Rudy pooh!

What the hell
is wrong with you?

You've gotta have everything?

-Are you filming this?
-Whoa.

You're sick, dude.
You're a sick man!

There's a hidden camera?
I don't believe you!

You can have
anyone, man. Why her?

You knew how much
I love her.

Dude. Chill.
It's just a prank.

I didn't take her all the way
to bone town.

Psych!

We did the nasty,
straight up...

Dude,
I'm messing with you.

Stasha was totally in on it.

You should see your face.

Really?

Yeah, really.

So, did Finn sleep
with Rudy's girlfriend or not?

Don't know, dude.

Rudy, man...

Rudy, when we last spoke,
you told me you and Finn
were buds.

I hope he treated you
better behind the camera
than he did in front of it.

Oh, I get it.

Punch me in the nuts.

Um... no.

It's not weird.
I'm just making a point.

Punch me in the nuts.

Awesome.

You see. It's a show.

I'm wearing a cup.

I'm always wearing a cup.

This coffee's for you, Rudy.

You know, those k-cups,
they got these new flavors.

This one's caramel
vanilla cream.

Why don't you take
a seat, Rudy?

Caramel vanilla cream.

Man, that smells good.

We wanted to ask you about
a video that featured
your girlfriend.

You were all crying,
blubbering like
a little bitch.

Was that just
part of the show?

Duh.

It was just a prank.
He didn't really do her.

Stasha was in on it.

For, like, 30 seconds,
i thought it was real.

Quite an actor,
your girlfriend.

Wife.

Married five months now.

She still gives me hell
for falling for it.

Your coffee's getting cold.

Gotta admit.
Not really a coffee person.

-You're not gonna drink that?
-Go to town.

Mmm. That's good stuff.

One last thing, Rudy.

We were hoping you could shed
some light on an incident
Kong hoshi had with Finn.

If you say the letters "n",
"d" or "a",

I am so gonna
bag-tag your ass.

I didn't sign any nda.

I wasn't there,
but I heard about it.

Kong's son, Lee, tried to
skateboard off his rooftop
into the pool and missed.

Wound up crippled for life.

Does that have anything
to do with Finn?

Finn was Lee's hero.

And Finn might have provided
Lee with some pro tips for
how to pull off said stunt.

Rumor is, the show had to
cough up beaucoup settlement
money to Kong's family.

We need to have
another chat with Kong.

Thanks for coming by, Rudy.

I'll be down in the morgue.

Liv...

-Mmm-hmm.
-Why can't I let go
of this coffee mug?

Super stickum, bitch!

Aw! Too bad, clive-y sad!

Too bad, clive-y sad!

This is amazing.

Then my work here is done.

Ah, but that's
where you're wrong.

I landed us an invite to the
zombie truthers meeting

tomorrow night.

-Shut up!
-Ow.

I posted a ton on the zombie
truthers message boards

under the username
indiancowboy.

Stuff like, "you might be
working with a zombie

"and not even know it."

A zombie crashing a zombie
haters club meeting.

It's like the coolest
dare imaginable.

We could even do accents.

You be American and
I'll be brit!

Mind the gap, you dumb squib!

I cocked up
that giddy kipper.
Now I'm all collywobbles.

And I only speak one language
and I wear white socks!

Usa! Usa!

I think we need to practice.

I wish I could,
but I've got big plans.

What up!

Holla.

-Ooh. Something smells good.
-Follow me.

So, check it.

I've been
on zombie dates before
where the gentleman zombie

and I weren't rocking
the same brain.

I was a pathological liar,
he was a hypochondriac.

He was gay, I was a nympho.

So, how about we hop
on the same brain train?

Mmm... this spoon-feeding
thing makes me think
you ate my mom's brain.

That'd make for an
uncomfortable night.

Come on.

I dare you to eat it.

All right.

All right.

So what do we have in store?

Buckle up, my friend.

We're gonna take
this night to the next level.

Where do we get our hands
on some super Max?

Super...

Are you ready for this?

Oh, yeah!

My mom never let me
play with these.

Too dangerous.

We're going to get some
serious hang-time,
now that we're super maxed.

So ready?

These babies are
going into orbit!

Okay. One,

two, three!

Prepare for re-entry!

You're a fun date.

Oh, look, a falling star!

Whoo.

Whoo! That was insane!

Human pincushion!

Bull's eye!
Let me get that for you.

Ow! Kelly clarkson!

Huh?

Yo. I got your suit
and the flame retardant
from Rudy.

That's not
the flame retardant.

Rudy says it's a new brand.

Says it's better.
I don't know.

Yeah, that's right.

That's just
how I do it.

Tupac's most definitely
a zombie.

Dude gets capped, but he's
still releasing songs.

You know who I'd bet
is a zombie?

Christina ricci.

She gives off
a real zombie vibe.

Donald!
Fix me another old fashioned.

Try not to muddle
the muddling this time.

Crush, then stir.

Don't jam it in
like it's prom night.

Jawohl.

don e. Boy.

I can hear you
mouth breathing.

Really doing it for me.

How the hell are you getting
reception from six feet under?

Sleep with one eye open,
my friend.

I know where you and my dear
old dad have set up shop,

and I'm coming for you both.

If there's anything left
on your bucket list,
I suggest...

-Where's my cherry?
Do I have to...
-Blaine just called.

He ain't dead.

I took care of him, boss.

One in the gut, like you said,
then one in the mouth.

No way he survived.

Then I just heard
from his ghost.

The three of you, find him!
Bring me his head this time!

Clive babineaux. Seattle pd.

-Is Rudy around?
-Oh, I'm afraid he's not home.

I'm stasha's aunt, essi.

Stasha's napping
at the moment.

We're investigating the death
of Finn "vincible."

We were hoping to take a look
in Rudy's workshop,
where the props get made.

Well, I don't see
any harm with that.

There's a key under the mat.

Thank you, ma'am.

Clive!
Check this sucker out!

I'll give you 300 bucks
if you let me zap you with it.

No.

Boring.

This is what you were like!

Here's what we came for.

It says
it's a flame retardant.

Damn.

Think Rudy changed the label?

One way to find out.

Wait! Wait!
What are you doing?

Don't do that! Don't...

Looks like it retards flames.

Uh, so much for that lead.

What do you think
you're doing?

You've got no right
to be here.

Aunt essi said it was cool.

It's fine.
We were just leaving.

- It's all right.
It's all right.

Look! There's your mama.

Stasha, he started
crying again.

Mind if I ask how old he is.

As a matter of fact, I do.

He's just four days old!

Isn't he precious?

I'm guessing he favors
his father?

You told us you
married stasha.

You failed to mention
you were starting a family.

We met your son.

Good looking kid.

I guess congratulations
are in order.

-Thanks.
-You haven't been
home in a while.

Last your wife saw you,

you stormed out
of the delivery room

just moments
after his arrival.

Finn's death,
it's really messed me up.

I don't want to take
that energy home.

That video of you catching
Finn in bed with your girl...

You know when that was?

I don't know. A while back.

Thirty-nine weeks.

A hair over nine months.

Stasha lied to you.

She did sleep with Finn.

And you found out
in the delivery room,
didn't you?

That's his son, not yours.

It was the final indignity,
wasn't it?

So, you made another
hay suit, this one untreated.

You wanted him to catch fire.

You wanted to
watch him suffer.

Boohoo, Rudy pooh.

Finn was evil.

I did the world a favor.

Someone posted the video
of his death online?

The most-watched
stunted growth video ever.

I beat him at his
own game, didn't I?

-Rudy bachman, you have
the right...
-It's Rudy pooh.

I'm legally changing it.

Rudy bachman,
you have the right
to remain silent.

Anything you say

can and will be used
against you
in the court of law.

You.

Unpack that crate before
the brains thaw out.

On it.

Angus:
Call up the usual suspects.
I want someone guarding...

Keep the doors locked
and your guns loaded

no one steps a foot in or out
unless I give the word.

Anyone asks
why we're not open,

tell 'em we got
a pest problem.

Someone order cement?

Wait!

Hey, dad.

Wanna go have a catch?

Ah!

I have to say,

I'm proud of you.

I didn't think
you had it in you.
This took initiative.

Oh, in that case,
all is forgiven.

Look at you now.

I managed to turn
a spoiled little brat
into a man.

A man with ambition.

Really?

You're going with the
boy named sue
defense, huh?

I got a business venture
you're gonna find interesting.

Let's focus
on the future, huh?

Mcdonough and son.

Unlimited growth.

Unlimited wealth.

Let's step into my office.

Nah, you step into my tub.

Come on.

I got work to do.

The old mcdonough
family estate.

So many childhood memories.

After you would beat me,
or humiliate me,

or psychologically torture
mom, I'd visit this well.

I'd toss a penny inside
and wish you'd drop dead.

Old man says what?

Oh, poor you!

You were miserable
because I beat you.

I beat you because
you were miserable.

I offered you a shot

at making millions
of dollars...

Hundreds of millions...

Together, father and son,

but poor baby
has hurt feelings.

You're weak.

You're no businessman.

You were a waste
of my sperm.

I gotta say...

That kind of stings.

There's about $1.40
in pennies down there, dad.

Maybe you can bribe
your way out.

-Surprise.
-Not really.

What with the two dead
zombies out there,

I'd be a lot more surprised
if your pops
was sitting in that chair.

Don't worry.

He's alive and...Well.

Like I care.

So...

How you wanna do this?
Cowboy style?

Reach for your pistols.
See who's the
quick draw McGraw?

Shoot you, don e.?

I need you.

Hell, I got two brick
and mortar businesses to run.

You read this?

Above my pay grade.

My dad saw the future...

Ah, the future is brains.

He told me that much.

Did he share with you
how much money he
thought we could make

if we only aimed bigger?

Much bigger?

I say you should
manage the bar here.

This is your place.
What you say goes.

-I'll handle
the brain business...
-Stop talking.

You had me at money.

Discovery day is coming.

Or haven't you heard?

What's it going to take
to wake you zombies up?

There are six dead already.
Six of our own.

You've gotten soft.

And lazy.

We're supposed to be
protecting the zombies

who came out of the
basement of Max rager.

Why aren't we?

Carey gold gave us
the night off for the wake.

From now on, if you need
more toner for the copier,

or you want to get your kid
in a new elective, you see
Carey gold.

Anything relating to the
defense of our species,

you see me and only me.
Understood?

Sir! Yes, sir.

I went through
fortesan's inventory,

and I noticed he was
missing six cans of super Max.

I'm wondering if someone
thought it would be fun

to steal it for the party.

Uh...

That was me, sir.

I took them.

I didn't think anybody...

Don't do it again.

We've got lots to do
tomorrow, boys and girls.

Be on time.

Would you hurry up in there?

Chill!
It has to look perfect.

I know what you're thinking.

"Where'd Liv go?"

What about me?

Try to sweat less.

I'm entering a gun range
full of zombie-hating,

possibly zombie-murdering
conspiracy theorists.

And I'm accompanying
an undercover zombie.

Excuse me if I perspire.

It's an awesome stunt,
isn't it?

We should be filming it.

Husband?

We got this.

Uh... Liv?

120 over 80.

Go on in.

We've gotta get out of here.

No way. We have to find out
what they're planning.

They'll mark you
as a you know what
in a heartbeat.

One very slow heartbeat.

What if I get my
adrenaline going?

I can pass this test,
no sweat.

Liv, you cannot risk this.

Crap. Harley saw me.

Do I know you from somewhere?

I get that a lot.

Don't I get that a lot?

She gets that a lot.

There's this girl on one
of those shows on TV

and everyone says
i look like her.

-What's it called?
-Oh, yes.

It's got a dumb name.
What is it?

I could've swore we met.

Next.

In any case,

uh, we just got a text message
from our babysitter

saying she's puking
her guts out,

so one of us has to
go home and look after

little aanjaneya and jaahanvi.

Who's up?

I'll go home
and see to the kids.

But I want to know everything.

Zombies are real.

There's one everywhere I go.

Love you, honey.