Young Sheldon (2017–…): Season 5, Episode 20 - Uncle Sheldon and a Hormonal Firecracker - full transcript

Previously on
Young Sheldon...

I'm pregnant.

I heard them talking
about a baby.

Oh, my.
You know what that means.

Mom's pregnant.
Exactly.

Everybody loves a wedding.

I'm having a baby. I don't need
to marry another one.

Mary, they already made
one giant mistake.

They don't have to make another.

So marrying me was a mistake.

You're honestly happy
with how your life turned out?

You have no regrets?

What do you want me to say?

I want you to admit
that this marriage

hasn't exactly been
a bed of roses.

Wake up. No marriage
is a bed of roses.

Well, then I guess we nailed it.
I guess we did.

Can you take Missy
to school today?

Why? It's on your way.

I have to drop the church
bulletin off at the printer.

Nobody reads those things.

I know we're not getting along
right now,

but when we walk
into that kitchen,

Missy and Sheldon
do not need to see us fighting.

Fine.

So, you'll take her?

Whatever you say, dear.

Mom and Dad are still
really upset.

With good reason.
She's awfully old

to be having a baby.

Is it really dangerous?

Not with modern science,
but back in pioneer times,

we'd be burying her
down by the crick.

I'm just saying
they're cranky enough,

so don't be a pain in the ass.

I'm always on my best behavior.

You're the hormonal firecracker
around here.

Sheldon.

And thar she blows.

Moby Dick.

It's a book.

Where the hell's
my travel mug?

I think Georgie took it, dear.

That son of a gun.

Missy, your father's
gonna take you to school today.

Thanks, Daddy. I hope
it's not too much trouble.

No trouble at all,
my little angel.

Why'd you say they're cranky?

They're fine.

♪ Nobody else
is stronger than I am ♪

♪ Yesterday I moved a mountain

♪ I bet I could be your hero

♪ I am a mighty little man

♪ I am a mighty little man.♪

Okay, you can do this.

Just tell him.

Everything okay?

Oh! What? Yes.
What are you doing there?

I came for the stapler
but stayed for the show.

Oh. Well, I was just going in

to talk to Pastor Jeff.
Hmm.

Then go.

I'm going.
Do it.

I'm doing it.

See?

Very convincing.

Come in.

What's up?

I was hoping to get
your take on something.

Of course.

Um...

This isn't really about me,

but I recently met a young woman

who got pregnant, um...

out of wedlock.

I see.

Is the young man in the picture?

He is.

Well, as long as
they tie the knot

before the bambino pops out,
the big guy looks the other way.

Right, right.

But the woman isn't
so keen on...

knots or tying them.

Then I'm afraid
she and that poor baby

are in for a difficult time.

I know. Um...

What about the parents
of the young couple?

Well, they certainly
didn't raise these kids

with the right values.

I only get them one day a week.

The rest of it's on Mom and Dad.

Right. Right.

Um...

Oh. But, um...

what if the boy's parents

did want to do the right thing?

I don't see
how it's their fault.

Well, didn't the boy
still have premarital sex

which led to pregnancy?

Yes.

You have to ask,

where were his parents?

Mm-hmm.

These are all good questions.

Okay, let's take a look
at the board now, Judy, Lisa,

and see what subjects
we're dealing with

in this match of Tic-Tac-Dough.

Famous Blondes,

Trivia Dare, Explorers...

...Colors, Geology,
Top Ten, Movies...

I'll be right back, Wink.

What?
We know what's going on at home.

And we need to talk.

I'm in the middle
of something important.

So are we.

Um, may I please come in?

...thousand eight hundred...

What's up?

Why won't Mom and Dad
tell us what's going on?

Well, there might be
several reasons for that,

but right off the top
of my head, I'd say

none of your damn business.

Mom's having a baby,
and that's none of our business?

Is that
what you think's going on?

Isn't it?
No.

Then what's going on?

None of your damn business.

We need to talk.

Kind of busy.

This is important.

I was talking
to Pastor Jeff

about our...
little situation.

Why would you tell him?
He doesn't know it's Georgie.

But people are gonna
find out eventually,

and they're gonna
judge all of us.

Who cares what people think?

I care. We live in this town.

I work at the church.

Hello?

Heads up.
The twins were just here,

and they were asking
a bunch of questions.

You didn't tell them, did you?

No, but they know
there's a baby in the mix.

Actually,
they thought you were having it.

Oh, Lord.

Yeah. Anyway, they're gonna be
there any minute.

Have fun.

What now?

We're home.

And we want answers.

That.

In here.

We want to know
what's going on.

And we know it has something
to do with a baby.

And we know it's not yours.
So whose is it?

This is a private matter,

and it does not concern you.

It's Georgie.

You don't know that.
It all makes sense.

You were talking with him
in the garage the other night.

And word on the street is
he's sexually active.

Ew.

So, who's preggers?

Yes, who?
All right.

Family meeting now.

I'll leave you to it.
George!

Fudge.

Okay, yes, your...

Your brother's
gonna have a baby.

With whom?
Her name is Mandy.

Ooh, she's the one
that's older than him.

How much older?

That's not important.

That means a lot.
Thank you.

Do I really need

to be here for this?
Yes.

Double fudge.

Are they getting married?

We don't know, but probably.
Mary.

It would be better for them

and better for the baby.

And better for you so
your church friends

don't get bent
out of shape.

We'll talk
about this later.

Ooh, a subcommittee
just formed. Exciting.

The important thing is,
is that you both

need to keep this quiet.

This is family business.

I have to keep a secret?
I'm not good at those.

It's not a secret.
No one's gonna ask you about it.

It's just a thing
you don't need to bring up.

But what if I do?

What if you don't?

But now it's all
I can think about.

What if my mouth loses control?

You're good
at keeping promises, right?

Very.
Great.

Then promise
you won't tell anybody.

That's an interesting
work-around. However...

You're not telling anyone.
Fine.

I'm gonna be an aunt.

That's so weird.

Not as weird as
Uncle Sheldon.

Yeah, well,
we're gonna be grandparents.

And Meemaw's gonna be
a great-grandmother.

That sounds so old.

Please tell her that.

Good night, Wade.

It ain't good.
I lost all my money.

Well, good for me.

Yeah, yeah.

Hey, Mandy. It's me again.

Just wanted to see
how you were doing.

If there's anything
you need, I'm around.

Please call me back.

She ducking your calls?

Seems like it.

Well, you understand why she
might not want to talk to you.

Yes, I know.

I'm trying to make up for it.

This might be
one of those things

you just can't make up for.

Ain't fair.

You better do
some growing up fast,

'cause "fair" left the building

the second
you yanked your pants down.

Thanks for making me feel worse.

Anytime.

What is the angular momentum
of the neutron and the proton

inside deuterium?

No one? Really?

Sheldon?

Yes?

What is the angular momentum
of the neutron and the proton

inside deuterium?

Oh, um, "L" equals zero.

Close. You're missing
the four percent admixture

of "L" equals two.

Sorry. I'm a little distracted.

It happens. Anyway...

Normally,
I would have gotten that right.

I have no doubt. Anyway...

There are just some things
going on at home,

and I'm not allowed to talk
about it.

And we don't want
to hear about it.

I can tell you no one's sick
in case you're concerned.

Anyone concerned?

Show of hands.

No? Moving on.

That's why
I got the answer wrong.

Son, it's just a mistake.

Everyone makes them.

Like my brother Georgie did
when he got that girl pregnant.

Don't say it.
Don't say it. Don't say it.

What?

I need to use the restroom.

This is college. Just go.

You, red shirt. Lock the door.

Knock, knock.

Oh, hi.

Just thought I'd show you

how to do it on the first try.

You all right?

Um... Yeah.

Just, you know, life.
Mm.

I've heard that can be rough.

Mm.

Well,
if you ever want to talk or...

grab a smoke,

I'm around.

I'm good, thanks.

Although, um...

A cigarette doesn't sound bad.

I was hoping
someone would help me

get to the end of this pack.

Then we're quitting.
Absolutely.

It's a disgusting habit.
Filthy.

You are never gonna
believe what I just heard.

Try me.

Roy and the boosters

were wining and dining
that coach from Carthage.

I don't even care anymore.
He can have my job.

Well, if you don't care,
why can't I have it?

Fine, take it.

Are you okay?

Oh, jim-dandy.

Is this one of those times
where you say

you don't want to talk about it,

and then you make me go
to the bar,

and then you talk about it?

No.

All right.

I'm gonna tell you something.

Lay it on me.

This is serious.

You can't tell anyone.

Okay.

Georgie got a girl pregnant.

Wow.

Oh.

Congratulations?

On having a dope for a son?
Thanks.

Forgive me if I'm mistaken,

but weren't you a similar kind
of dope with Mary?

It's different.

Georgie's, like,
11 years younger than this girl.

That is different.

We're gonna need
a couple shots over here.

Sorry again
for being distracted earlier.

And I'm so sorry
you got locked out.

I don't know how that happened.

My brother got a girl pregnant.

My mom wanted me to promise

I wouldn't tell,
but I never did,

so technically,
I'm not breaking my word.

I don't care.

Thank you. But it's a secret,

so please don't tell anyone.

Don't you have somewhere to go?
No.

Can I tell you something
in confidence?

Of course.

Um,

my son...

...got a girl pregnant.

Whoa.

Safe to assume this
was a surprise?

Oh, yeah.

And safe to assume
it's not Sheldon?

Also yes.

Now my mom
wants them to get married,

but it doesn't sound
like the girl's willing.

Why are you still talking to me?
You and I just click.

So, how are you doing
with all this?

Oh.

Disappointed.

Angry, upset, scared.

So all the emotions. Got it.

And I'm worried

that if he doesn't marry
this girl,

the congregation's
gonna turn on me.

They might.

But that's putting
man before God.

What do you mean?
Well, you're caring more

about what people think
than what God thinks.

I'm not caring more.

I just don't have to bump
into God at the grocery store.

I don't think he does
his own shopping.

Well, at this point,
it doesn't matter,

because she doesn't want
to get married.

Well, I can talk to her
if you want.
Mm.

I'm pretty good
with young people.

She's 29.

Also pretty good
with people my own age.

Let's say grace.

Bless us, Lord, for the food
we are about to receive,

and bless the hands
that prepared it. Amen.

Amen.

I told Dr. Linkletter
about Georgie.

Why'd y'all tell Sheldon?

They didn't. I figured it out.

Great. Now everyone knows.

Not everyone.

Just us and Dr. Linkletter.

So, that's it?

Nobody else said anything?
Mm.

Good. 'Cause her parents

still don't know,
and if this gets out,

she's gonna be more pissed
than ever.

Everything's gonna be fine.

Let's just eat.

I kind of told Heather M.
at school.

I told her to keep it a secret.

Did you keep it a secret?

No.

Unbelievable.

Actually,
I told someone at church today.

And I might have told Wayne.

I can't believe y'all.

I know. You'd expect it from me,
but from them, it's a shocker.

I ain't hungry.

So, if you haven't told
your parents yet,

you might want to,

'cause my family blabbed,
and it's out there.

I know. I know you're angry.

I'm angry, too.

Please don't hang up.

Come in.

Hey.
Hey.

Just wanted to say
I'm really sorry.

Forget it.

You have so much to
deal with right now,

and I made it worse.

People are gonna find out
eventually.

Do you think
you're gonna get married?

It ain't looking good.

Do you even want to?

Well, I do like her.

And I'm trying to do
the right thing.

Whatever that is.

Can't believe you're
gonna be a dad.

Join the club.

Is it weird?

M-More terrifying than weird.

Yeah?

I don't know what I'm doing.

What if I mess this kid up?

You won't.

You sure?
I'm a high school dropout

living out
in his parents' garage.

Mandy's right
to not want me around.

No, she's not.

She'd be lucky to have you.

So will the baby.

Don't make me cry more.

Sorry.

That's the last nice thing

I'll ever say to you.

Hey, what did Wayne say
when you told him?

He loves babies, so he was all,

"It's a blessing."
Blah, blah, blah.

Well, he's not wrong.

Why am I friends with him?
You should be.

How'd Pastor Jeff take it?

I didn't tell him.
I told Pastor Rob.

Of course.

What's that mean?
Nothing.

What?

Just seems like you talk
to Pastor Rob a lot.

Well, we work together.

You talk to Wayne.

Sure.
And what did Pastor Rob say?

Actually, it was helpful.

He pointed out

that I was putting people
before God

and that I shouldn't worry about
what the congregation thinks.

So, exactly what I said.

All you said was, "Who cares?"

Next time, I'll stick God
in there so you pay attention.

Hey.

Where were you?

Talking to Georgie.
He okay?

We laughed, we cried.
It was nice.

♪ Which will you go for?

♪ Which will you love?

Hey, Joan. It's Mary.

Just wanted to make sure

that you knew
Bible study was today?

Oh, no.

I'm sorry to hear that.

♪ Which will you answer?

Susan. Mary Cooper.

Just making sure
everything's okay

since you're not at Bible study.

Oh.

♪ Which will you take for...

Of course. No problem.

I understand.

♪ One and all?

♪ And tell me now

♪ Which will you love
the best? ♪

Hey. It's Mary.

Do you have time to talk?

For you, always.

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