Wynonna Earp (2016–…): Season 4, Episode 6 - Episode #4.6 - full transcript
(WYNONNA): Previously
on "Wynonna Earp"...
I will do anything to get her back.
I did something terrible
when you were in the Garden.
- (NEDLEY): Some kind of hex?
- To the end of the Earps.
The Clantons were dickheads.
They murdered people,
- stole their land.
- We're in a war, Holliday.
It's just a town. Them
women would have us
- both fight to the death.
- Peacemaker, come!
I want the woman in the painting.
- (BOTH): Rosita?!
- We need to focus on a cure.
Where we drown you in salted holy water.
I love you.
Hey, I know how this looks,
but I'm asking you to trust us.
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
Oh!
Okay, that's cold.
How you doing?
Like I'm about 35 shades of grey.
Is this much kink
necessary to break a spell?
Technically it's an exorcism. So... yep.
Also, who was it that cursed you again?
The... (GAGGING)
Jeremy, you know I can't
say it without barfing frogs!
Sorry. Just, final test...
before you temporarily drown.
Super temporarily.
Once the hourglass runs
out, we bring you back,
spell's broken, and we all go out
for veggie burgers and flies... fries.
Fries. Here.
Oh, she's froggin' gorgeous.
Well, I picked the cutest,
deadest one in the bucket.
Let's hop to it.
Grab that hex and ribbit right out!
If you guys are gonna to keep this up,
would you drown me instead?
We wouldn't be doing this
if we weren't sure it would work.
Yeah. And if we didn't
have any other options.
Okay. So we're gonna
monitor your vitals.
Leave everything to magic,
nothing to chance.
(BEEPING)
- You ready?
- Well, I'd rather not
keep barfing frogs and
trying to kill my friends.
So, yeah.
Okay. Once you're under,
your consciousness should
transfer to the frog.
Two will become one.
My favorite Spice Girls song.
It's gotta be a good sign!
One with the frog.
Okay...
(BEEPING)
- Hey.
- Hey.
No matter what happens,
don't let me come up
until it's done. Okay?
Okay.
And guys... Thank you.
Okay.
(BREATHING DEEPLY)
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
(CHANTING INCANTATION)
(CHANTING CONTINUES)
(BEEPING)
Okay, okay.
Her heart rate's
slowing down. Okay, good.
Good.
(GASPING)
Oh no. Her survival
instincts are kicking in!
Sorry, Nicole, either I kill you now,
or you kill me later!
Keep incantating!
(CHANTING CONTINUES)
(INTENSE MUSIC)
(CONTINUOUS BEEP)
Okay. It's done.
(CHANTING)
Jeremy! What the hell are you doing?
Oh no.
Okay, I know how this looks,
but I'm asking you to trust us.
(OMINOUS MUSIC)
Waverly! Don't interfere!
I'm gonna interfere
with your friggin' face!
What the hell did you do?
Is she dead?
Technically...
- (FROG CROAKS)
- Yes! It worked!
- It worked!
- What? What worked?
Can't you see? She's in the frog!
You put my girlfriend into a frog?
And you're welcome.
(HAWK SCREECHING)
Dead? Not quite.
(CHUCKLING)
Testing our bonds, are you?
Well, it ain't that easy, Missy.
What I gave, I can take.
Yes. That will do.
(CHUCKLING)
An eye for an eye, a
breath for a breath,
seek and destroy, and
be joined in death.
_
(WHISTLING)
(GROWLING)
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
Waverly Earp.
Onward, my boy.
♪ 'Cause I gave you all I got to give ♪
♪ I know that ain't no way to live ♪
♪ So I told that devil ♪
♪ To take you back ♪
♪ I told that devil ♪
♪ To take you back ♪
- It was her idea!
- What was?!
Handcuffing you to
the bed, the exorcism.
She knew you'd try and stop her.
- (NEDLEY CHANTING)
- Look. According to the Maglu,
if we can't destroy the spell-caster,
then we must cleanse the
one who's been cursed.
What, by drowning her?!
Temporarily.
Waves, as long as she stays
in the frog, she's okay.
She's not a strong swimmer.
Once the timer runs out,
the hex will be broken,
and we'll slowly revive her
without risking brain damage.
(FROG CROAKING)
If you want to help,
just watch the frog.
(CHANTING CONTINUES)
Okay...
Hi, sweetie-pie, it's me.
Are you really in there?
(FROG CROAKING, WAVERLY GASPS)
(CROAKING)
Rosita?! Of all the Revenants
who could have survived,
it's busty, brainy,
baby-stealing Ro-fucking-sita?
- So this is it.
- This is what?
Seventy-six down, one to go.
You're gonna kill me
last, like you said.
- Done.
- There will be no killing.
As much as I also crave
the satisfaction...
We need you alive.
It's your lucky day.
- Come on.
- I can't, dummies!
Look, a year ago, maybe
more, there was this rumble,
some kind of earthquake.
Yeah. It was a doozy, we were all shook.
You remember Creepy Phil?
The Revenant with all the boils?
For reasons that are
unimportant right now,
he rounded up a posse to hunt me down.
Did you steal his baby too?
I slept with his wife.
How nefarious.
I for one would love to hear more.
(CHUCKLING)
(CLEARING THROAT)
So, I ran to the only place
that I thought I'd be safe.
This outcropping?
Revenants said stepping
on it made you feel
like you were turning inside out.
But I've always had
a high pain tolerance.
Doc, you know that.
Anyway, I ran here,
with Phil and his posse
right on my tail, and
the rumbling got louder,
and then all of the Revenants...
poofed, one by one.
Leaving you with boil-faced Phil
on inside-out-Island.
Yeah. Except something changed.
We couldn't feel the pain anymore.
And then Phil got handsy, so...
I kicked the bastard in the throat,
he fell off the rock, and poof,
disappeared with the rest of them.
Yeah, he did! Forget Phil.
Look, it doesn't take a genius,
although I actually am one,
to figure out if he
poofed, then so would I.
Look, it's been great catching up,
but I can't leave this island.
Now what?
Tie her up and hope she
doesn't spontaneously combust?
I don't need to know what
you two got up to in the sack.
- Look.
- Ammolite.
Revenant Kryptonite.
This rock formation hurt Revenants
before the curse was broken.
So now, it must protect them.
If there's more, we can get...
(MOCKINGLY): ... Rosita off the island.
- The tribe has spoken.
- Tribe?
Just find more rainbow rocks
before I change my mind
and break her silky smooth neck.
(TENSE MUSIC)
Pick up, pick up, pick up!
(VOICEMAIL): Hi, this is Waverly!
Leave a message, and I'll ring-a-ding
- you right back!
- Oh shit... Ahh!
Look what I got here.
The little Earp lover.
Poking her nose where it don't belong.
- Who sent you?
- Get bent.
- Was it Holliday?
- It was nobody! Let me go!
Sorry, Miss, no can do.
You brought this on yourself.
What are you going to do?
I need to make a call! Stop it!
Okay, her temperature is stable.
Her heartbeat's been stopped
for almost five minutes.
Waverly? How much more time?
I don't know, forever?
- Next time, I'll get quicksand.
- (NEDLEY CHANTING)
Wait! Okay! It's done. It's done!
What, is the spell broken? Is she free?
We won't know until she wakes up.
- You can that stop now.
- Oh. Thank Christ.
And start the reversal incantation.
- Reversal?
- Yeah, we have to get her
out of the frog, and back into her body.
Can I at least get a... Oh. Thank you.
Please guys, hurry!
(NEDLEY CHANTING)
What are you waiting for!?
She's definitely gonna punch me.
- Jeremy!
- No! Don't use those on her!
- Why not?
- Of course,
- because of the water!
- You can't paddle a flat-liner,
- Dr. Dingus!
- Well okay, then what do I do?
(OMINOUS MUSIC)
What was that?
I don't know. The wind?
(FROG CROAKING)
Waverly?
I've been marked.
(SCREAMING)
(SCREAMING)
Billy! You're a Reaper now?
- What do you want?
- I don't know.
- To bring back Nicole's vitals!
- Not you! The Reaper!
(REAPER SCREECHING)
What the hell are you doing?
Can't you see it? Oh,
the fudging Clantons!
I've been marked! (SCREAMING)
Oh, guys?
- It... She got out.
- No, please!
No, no, no, no! Nicole?!
Nicole! Whatever happens,
stay in that frog!
Please!
(SCREECHING, SCREAMING)
Okay! Oh, hey, hi, Nicole!
Oh, you're so cute. Okay.
No, no.
(REAPER SCREECHING)
Okay, I got you, Nicole.
Oh! Argh! Nicole! Come back here!
Please, please! No!
(CROAKING)
(WAVERLY): No!
(INTENSE MUSIC)
(PANTING)
Holy shit!
Did you stop it?
Maybe?
No, baby. I did.
That's it?
There isn't much.
Ammolite is a rarity.
How are we gonna get her
all the way back to the sanctuary?
Back stone moves to front. Repeat.
Alright.
Rosita? Follow the path.
The ammolite will keep you safe.
Yeah. From searing agony, or you?
The rumbling you heard was Bulshar
ending the curse, alright?
There's no Earp vs.
Revenant thing anymore.
We're good. We don't need to fight.
It was your baby too.
I suppose you did what
you did to survive.
And I forgive you.
Totes. Water under
the bridge. (CHUCKLING)
Yeah, mega convincing.
I can smell the grudge on you
like stale beer and Bubba Kush.
That's actually the smell of
my house almost burning down.
Pinky swear you won't hurt me.
- How old are you?
- Pinky swear!
Oh, my God.
We hereby pinky swear
that we'll not harm a hair on your head.
Or anywhere else on my body.
The devil's in the details!
Alright, whatever.
Come on.
Okay.
(EXHALING)
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
(GASPING)
Oh, my God. I did it!
(LAUGHING)
And I don't feel anything.
Oh, thank you!
Oh! Whoa!
God, I forgot how good you smell.
Thanks.
Wait, careful!
Can't have you poofing out on us.
Okay.
(BELLS CHIMING)
What is that?
The Celtic Sisters knot
has appeared once more.
It's a shortcut. You coming?
To be among a plethora of women scorned?
Doubt I'd be welcome, long as
I got Richard and The Twins.
Alright. On three we step through.
Wait, what, women scorned?
And three!
(PHONE RINGING)
Sheriff Clayborn?
To what do I owe the pleasure?
Okay, so we have to figure
out which frog she's in.
Can we talk about this outfit?
This would be so much
easier if frogs had hair.
Come on, baby, just give me a sign!
- I'm trying.
- A few more minutes,
and she's gonna have
permanent brain damage.
Much more, and it'll be too late.
Okay, well...
- Should I kiss them?
- Worth a shot.
Uh, no! No, it is not!
I am not in the frog!
Okay, come here, little princess.
Just keep your tongue to yourself, okay?
(FROG CROAKING)
(SMOOCHING)
Okay. Did it.
- Yeah.
- Think she liked it?
Yeah, definitely.
Ah. So gross.
Alright, Sister Granny
Panties! Here she be.
A woman scorned.
My, you've done well, Wynonna Earp.
Well, you want worthy,
you come to the best.
She's all yours.
- Hand over Peacemaker.
- What the hell?!
You're trading me?
It's better than killing you.
Forgiveness?
Well now look who's carrying a grudge.
My gun?
What are they gonna do with me?
I didn't ask.
I just need to save my friend.
There was a time I thought
you and I were friends.
Rosita, it's just survival.
Why does it always involve
women betraying women?
Just as I had hoped.
There is something between you.
Something delicious.
The derision. The disdain.
It would be a shame to waste it.
Lady, if shame's what you're after,
I've got three seasons of
Flavor of Love on DVD, okay?
I don't give a rat's ass about Rosita,
I just want my gun.
And you shall have it.
And a step closer to
salvation. If you live.
- What?
- What?
- (BELL RINGING)
- Battle to the death!
(TENSE MUSIC)
Okay, alright. Listen.
Sure we've had our ishes,
but there's no way we're gonna...
(ALL SHOUTING)
♪ Here, kitty, kitty,
kitty, where'd you go ♪
Ahh!
What happened to women betraying women?
I saw an opening, I jumped on it!
I'll say, you're like
a sexy spider monkey!
- You lied!
- I promised not to hurt you.
So help me God! I'm
trying to keep my word!
Enough talk! Give in to
what you desire. Fight!
- (NUNS SHOUTING)
- You know what? Fuck it!
If I have to go through you
to get Peacemaker, I will.
I've fended off death for 140 years.
I'm great at not dying.
Then remove those tacky-ass hoops.
Oh yeah?
Bring it.
(CHEERING)
(GRUNTING)
Bitch, I have a lifetime
of settling arguments
with my fists and level three
BBD hand-to-hand combat.
And I got a big ole boot.
Son of a bitch!
(FROG CROAKING)
- Well?
- Nope.
- I'm not feelin' it.
- That was the last one.
I can't believe she's not
trying to give us a sign.
There's never a damn pottery
wheel when you need one!
Ugh! I am! I just don't
know the rules of Ghost!
Um...
Okay, what if...
(GASPS)
(BUZZING)
(GASPS)
Okay.
Oh, man. Now what is with this light?
Oh, God, I'm gonna have a seizure.
That's a pattern. That could be a code.
You're right! Morse code!
Yes! Baby, you never
cease to surprise me.
Okay. Uh... N.
N... O... T. Not.
I...
N...
F... R...
O... G.
No, no, that's a B. Not in frob?
- Ugh! Close enough!
- Close enough!
Okay, geez! She's not in the frog.
But she is still here, right? Somewhere.
Astral-projection.
People say it can occur near death.
Happened to me, my third heart attack.
Found my remote on top of the fridge.
Okay. Nicole, we can
hear you! What do we do?
(BUZZING)
B... A...
S... E...
- M... E...
- Basement. Basement.
Yeah. She wants us to go down there.
W-With the Reaper?
But that's insane! Nicole,
is that what you're saying?
D... U... H.
Well, that's her, alright.
Okay.
So you're gonna chat with
Nicole, through a creeper?
Reaper.
Someone in this room
made it their bitch,
and then tossed it down the stairs,
and I think that someone
was a ginger goddess.
Besides, anyone got a better idea?
Okay. I'll have to lower her
body temp to buy some time.
Like a frog hibernating in winter.
Slowing down bodily functions
to prevent cell deterioration.
- Great.
- But, if we lose the body,
I don't know what happens to the spirit.
- Ready?
- Yep.
Good luck.
- Come on.
- I have no fucking clue
what's happening here,
but when in doubt...
(SNARLING)
Nice Reaper.
(GROWLING)
Billy, what did they do to you?
(DEEP VOICE): Gave me the
might of a thousand ancestors.
Nicole?
Are you... Are you in the Reaper?
(NICOLE): Tell her why I did it.
Tell her why I made
the deal with the witch!
Yes, tell me.
(DEEP VOICE): You will now die!
I've got him dead-to-rights!
- Maybe.
- No! Don't shoot!
It's Nicole now!
I thought she was a goddamn frog!
She is a frog, and dead!
And also a Reaper. Stay
with the plot, Nedley!
Nicole, you are gonna
tell me everything.
Because if I you don't, the
love of my life might die,
and I'll get very angry,
and I don't even know
what might happen if I get very angry.
- Got it?
- (SNARLING)
(CHEERING)
To the death! Or you'll never
see your little toy again!
You know what? If you
had your own little toy,
maybe you wouldn't be so uptight!
Can you believe this shit?
(GRUNTING)
(CHEERING, SHOUTING)
You're all out of tricks, Earp.
- Not quite.
- Ahh!
Oh!
- Thank you, Dolls.
- (LAUGHING)
Why are you playing the old hag's game?
I am a survivor.
Last words that'll look super
ironic on your tombstone.
The more you choke, the harder I get.
Okay, boner.
Finish her!
- Demon nun.
- Of course.
- Ugh...
- Listen.
- Yeah?
- We don't find my gun,
- we're both dead.
- Okay.
Is that a Hemsworth in biking shorts?
A Xena reboot!
That's nice!
After them!
(DEEP VOICE): She's
ours. We have her soul.
She made a covenant. A life for a life.
W-Why would she...
Why would you make a deal
with the friggin' Clantons?
I didn't know it was them, okay?
I waited 18 months. I was desperate.
I should have believed
that you'd find a way home.
I'm sorry.
You will eat your own.
And I'm about to make
you eat baseball bat!
So how do we break the covenant?
Impossible!
The Swamp Witch has bound her.
The covenant only ends
when both actors die.
One down, one to go.
I will fix this, Nicole.
No. Baby, stop.
We are many.
I'll take my chances, thanks.
(GRUNTING)
(PANTING)
(DOOR CLOSING)
How many?
(GROWLING)
Do not let that thing out.
Gonna need Annabelle.
What? Where are you going?
To have a little chat
with the Swamp Witch.
This ain't no talking stick.
I'm coming with you.
Randy, there's a Reaper in the basement,
and my girlfriend is being
shocked like French beans.
Margo-Jean's son is the Sheriff.
There are still laws.
Well, if Mam Clanton
put the spell on her,
it might be the only way.
(SOFT MUSIC)
Nicole?
You saved my life.
Now it's my turn.
Okay, so as soon as Wynonna gets back
- with Peacemaker we...
- We don't have time!
Your plan didn't work!
Nicole wouldn't want it this way.
If I don't end Mam Clanton,
there might not be a
Nicole to want anything.
Keep her alive. For as long as you can.
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
(SHIVERING)
You'll be safe in here.
Yeah, sure. Which one of
these pointy-shooty things
are you gonna kill me with?
Depends.
You gotten enough off
your ample, perfect chest?
Guess we can call a truce.
Good.
'Cause I am sick and goddamn tired
of being told who to kill.
It's bad enough I have the
Clantons halfway up my hoop,
I don't need beef with you too.
- Clantons?
- (NUNS SHOUTING)
(DOORS RATTLING)
Grab something.
And keep an eye out
for a big-ass Buntline.
She is lying.
Gen Z knows more than she
says, we cannot let her live!
Just stay out of it, Cleo.
- Holt, we...
- Mr. Holliday! Come on in.
Well, go figure. Someone
does care about you.
You owe me five bucks.
Take it out of whatever
it's gonna cost me
to bail you out.
I'm not interested in your money.
Well then, what do you propose?
- Ooh! Dance-off. Let's do this.
- You can have this back.
Now go out there and
stare at it for a while.
I wanted to talk to you, man to man.
I've been thinking about what you said.
The blood we shed damns us all.
I'm tired, Holliday.
I'm tired of this fight.
Having a beef with enemies,
people that I barely even know,
because my ancestors
lost an unfair shootout.
No disrespect,
but your ancestors
were drunken assholes.
- As were your friends, and...
- I was their Asshole King.
But people can change.
I believe that.
I got a job now. Where
I can do some real good.
And... there's a woman
who works at the diner.
And I would love nothing
more than to be able
to invite her out to dinner at Shorty's.
And not have to worry about an Earp
shooting me in the back.
So...
We set enmity aside
for the sake of those
that bear our name, present and future?
Not the past?
I am damn near 170 years old, Sheriff.
The past is but a burden.
What's done is done.
And as for Rachel?
Well, she made Billy happy.
He was a...
He is a good kid.
He's never been poisoned
by the Clanton hate.
I believe it was the
Bard that wrote about
two love-struck kids
subverting a family vendetta.
Let us hope it's not too late
to give their story a happier ending.
I will bring our
proposition to Margo-Jean,
if you bring it to the Earps.
Thank you, Doc Holliday.
(CHUCKLING) That still sounds weird.
Well, let this be the beginning
of a new chronicle...
Our own.
(SIGHS)
No magic gun? Sword?
Hmm. No. No ammo either.
Overcompensating battle axe it is.
(CHOIR SINGING)
The falsetto fuck is that noise?
It's a requiem.
A mass for the dead.
Of whom I'm glad you're not one?
Oh, grammar.
You surviving makes me feel decent.
I don't play well with the other gals,
but we could've hung out.
Well, up until you...
Look, if the Earp Curse
is done, Wynonna,
then why do you still need Peacemaker?
Because my work isn't done.
(THUDDING ON DOOR)
(NUN): Open the door!
And neither is yours!
(CHOIR CONTINUES SINGING)
With your holier-than-thou attitude,
deciding who gets to
wield your rusty ass!
You think I'm not worthy?
Judgy tool!
You're the one hiding
like a little bitch!
(SHOUTING, LAUGHING)
Wynonna! They're coming!
The curse may be over,
but you know what?
Our enemies won't stop coming
just because we want them to!
And I know you want what I want!
(THUDDING ON DOOR)
To keep kicking evil ass.
Enough bullshit!
(CHOIR CONTINUES SINGING)
I do what needs to be
done because I'm a hero!
You know what, yeah,
sometimes... that makes me a killer.
If you won't fight,
you're both going to die!
(RESONATING)
(CHOIR CONTINUES)
Holy fuck.
Come to Mamma.
Hey, sexy.
(INTENSE CHOIR MUSIC)
(SIGHS)
Missed you too.
I am Medea.
Granddaughter of Helios.
Trifle with a woman
scorned at your own peril.
Man-made weapons?
(LAUGHING)
(DEEP VOICE): We keep
them here so you fools
won't harm yourself.
You wanna tell her?
Nah.
(GUN CLICKING)
Make your peace.
Fool.
(GUNSHOT)
That felt good.
Wynonna...
Maybe we should have
thought this one through.
You have freed us.
We are at your service.
Okay.
The Clantons are the dimwits
of the Earp legend, right?
Do you really think
Sheriff Creepy-Uncle-Vibe
is going to get Crazy Witch
to just forgive and forget?
These matters are best left to adults,
not youngins that've
recently been heartbroken
by a certain young swain.
(RACHEL SCOFFS): Swain?
Doc, I think they killed Billy!
Killed him? Their own kin?
I went to go find him, but
all I saw was his psycho mom
dripping blood on rocks, and
talking shit about Waverly.
- Where is she?
- She ain't answering my calls.
Now where are we going?
You are going home.
I am going to play consigliere.
Is there a single Old
around here that can answer
a simple question?
You have broken Medea's hold over us!
We are eternally thankful!
- Glad to be of help.
- Will you lead us?
Will you show us how to become cleansed?
(LAUGHING) Hells no.
Sister fact: nobody here is
more tainted than this guy.
Okay? Max taint all over this.
And I'm fine with that.
You guys, you're liberated. Go.
Taint yourselves. Taint.
We can't go.
Not without the pain.
Joanne? Is that you?
And Alma?
You know these wenches?
Yeah. Some of them.
From a long time ago.
Victims of Wyatt Earp.
Huh. America's most beloved executioner.
(SIGHS) He was such a dick.
- How did he... ?
- Collateral damage.
Wrong place, wrong time. Cursed once,
but protected here, it seems.
I'll get you out.
All of you.
Okay, there's gotta be
a way to set you free.
Dude, we all don't have
to be like you to be free.
This place is an upgrade on a rock.
Plus...
They seem nice.
Oh...
Yes, they do.
Alright, well if it makes
you happy, you do you.
(CHUCKLING) And you, and you, and you.
- Thanks for saving my ass.
- Well, be a shame not to.
(CHUCKLING)
Oh, wait.
I need to tell you something.
Do you know why I tried to steal Alice?
(CLEARING THROAT) Insurance against
being Peacemakered to hell?
And I...
had a buyer for your baby.
Margo-Jean Clanton.
Just...
- I thought you should know.
- I gotta go.
- Uh...
- (BELLS RINGING)
We don't have to hug.
(NEDLEY CHANTING)
- What's the tea?
- Uh...
Oh, good. A rock with a C on it.
- Who's been marked?
- Waverly.
She's on her way to
Magpie Ranch right now.
With a shotgun.
Then so are we.
Space, the funnest frontier?
(SIGHS)
God, what a dump.
OCD kicking in. Fight it, Waves.
You're not my Amazon delivery.
(GUN CLICKING)
You frogged my girlfriend.
I'll give you one chance to fix it
before I give you a buckshot face lift.
Sweetie, I can't fix it.
That's not how a vendetta works.
We're Capulets and Montagues.
Hatfields and McCoys.
Earps and Clantons.
You should thank me.
How do you think you
knew what door to take
out of the Garden? Gumption?
(LAUGHING) Oh, that
girl begged me, so...
I showed John Henry the way.
A blood feud can create a powerful bond,
even in between spiritual planes.
(LAUGHING) Oh, but she was feeble.
"Oh, please!
Help bring my angel
back, I'll do anything!"
- What did she do?
- She made a deal.
Doc comes back, with you in tow,
and Ms. Haught delivers him to me.
Doc? What the hell do you want with him?
He took everything from us.
At the O.K. Corral.
But I will ruin him,
his name, his reputation.
I will make him destroy
everything he loves.
You basic bitch!
Who gives a flippin' fudge
about the O.K. Corral anymore?!
If you don't release Nicole, she'll die!
You're young. You'll find someone else.
I'd rather die.
Then you'll be together.
(WAVERLY SCREAMING)
My ancestors will devour her.
I have powers you cannot comprehend!
Same, same, bitch.
(SIZZLING)
(GASPING, SCREAMING)
What did I do?
(GASPING)
(COUGHING)
- Holy crap.
- Nicole?
Blink once if you can hear me.
Why blink when I can talk?
Oh!
King of the Incantations!
It was the Swamp Witch.
- Jeremy, I'm so sorry.
- No, no, no, no.
At least you're not barfing
up a pond full of frogs!
You go, girl!
Okay, we need to warm her up slowly
to prevent cardiac arrest.
Get some blankets.
I am so glad that you didn't croak.
Yeah, but I frogged up... bad.
Hey. It's just what happens
when we're not all together.
Now...
Come here. Oh!
Oh!
(VEHICLE APPROACHING)
(BRAKES SQUEALING)
Wynonna.
Waves?
What happened, baby girl?
I think I goofed real bad.
Oh, I just heard from
Jeremy. Whatever you did,
it saved Nicole from frog-barf-o-rama!
She's okay? Oh, my God, it worked.
- More good news.
- Peacemaker?! How? What?
Long story.
We have had ourselves a day.
Hey!
Don't you fucking move!
You murdered my mother?!
Why? Why?!
I don't... I don't know. I'm sorry.
We had one chance to end this, Earp.
One goddamn chance.
And now there's nothing you can do
to right the wrongs of the O.K. Corral.
Oh, my God, get over it!
Your sicko witch mom had it coming.
You make your peace, Earp.
(GUNSHOT)
Lower your weapons!
Stand down!
Go ahead and off this
son of a bitch, Doc.
It's too late, Holliday.
It's too late.
It is never too late...
to bury a grudge.
Doc.
I'm the Clanton heir now.
Ex-squeeze me? That's
kind of an exclusive title.
- I got no choice.
- The one thing...
I have learned from Wynonna,
is there is always...
another way to confront a problem.
Whatever you may be up against,
we can work this out
for the good of our kin.
Together.
Like we agreed.
(BOTH): You agreed?
Billy's gone.
Mam turned him.
He didn't deserve it.
A lot of innocents have
fallen victim to this feud.
(CRYING)
And your family has
borne more than its share
of the burden.
(SOFT MUSIC)
Let us get a drink.
(GUNSHOT, GRUNTS)
(SOFT MUSIC)
Thanks for distracting him.
How is she?
Not so hot, but...
Alive and gargling buckets of mouthwash.
What you did, Wynonna...
It was so wrong.
- I believed in Holt.
- So did I.
He was right, they never
would've stopped coming for us.
There ain't a lick of honor
in shooting a man in the back.
(SIGHS)
My whole life...
demons, townspeople, enemies,
have tormented me and my family, okay?
I have had to kill again and again,
just to live another day, Doc.
Do you think I give a shit about honor?
You have had to do those things
because of Wyatt Earp.
Yeah. You were his best friend!
- I was.
- I think you're just pissed
'cause he told the truth
about you in that video.
You think that was the truth about me?
Maybe.
Do you want me just to say it, Henry?
I like you because you're not perfect.
You're all busted up inside, like me.
I do not want to be, anymore.
- Must be nice to have a choice.
- You have a choice, Wynonna!
Did you ever wonder why the Clantons
never turned Revenant?
It's because, yes, I had to
clean up Wyatt Earp's mess
when he shot and he ran.
At the O.K. Corral?
I killed them.
Doc. I never run.
And I never will.
(SOFT MUSIC)
I guess you and that
gun deserve each other.
It was the Clantons who wanted Alice.
- Are you coming in?
- Yeah.
I'm not much in the mood, darlin'.
Please. I'd like you both to be here.
(EERIE MUSIC)
To our first and
hopefully last exorcism!
Yes!
(DOOR CLOSING)
Oh, God. Hey!
I told you! Never leave the frog.
Okay, I will add it to my
ever-growing list of apologies.
Fun new rule: from now on,
nobody brings themselves
to the brink of death
to fix a silly mistake.
- Oh, I'll drink to that.
- Uh, no you won't.
Okay...
- No.
- (RACHEL SCOFFS)
- Nikki-Nikki-Nine-Door?
- Oh, God, no.
I am recovering from severe hypothermia.
Yes, doctor's orders.
Okay, I'll take one for you.
Are you two okay?
We're the same.
Ugh! Hey, Nic-averly!
Are you two young, sexy smoke shows
- getting married, or what?
- Dude.
- Jeremy!
- Ugh, what?!
What have you been doing all this time?
Okay, I mean, I get
it, I get it, you know,
in the Garden for 18 months,
defeating a shape shifter,
protecting the homestead,
a lot of lonely trapping, um...
Yeah, never mind, I'll shut up now.
(NEDLEY LAUGHING)
- Actually, I did...
- Well actually, I did have...
(BOTH): ... planned.
You did?
Me too.
♪ My heart, it was so numb ♪
♪ But now I can feel ♪
♪ It feels like I'm falling ♪
♪ And I don't know where ♪
♪ But I'm spinning with you, love ♪
♪ So I don't even care ♪
Waverly Earp...
Please.
Let me.
♪ Stalling ♪
♪ Falling ♪
♪ Calling ♪
♪ All in ♪
Nicole Haught.
Will you marry me?
Yes.
Yes. (LAUGHING)
Yes, I'll marry you.
Ah! Yes!
Yes! (LAUGHING)
Girls!
- Finally.
- Yay.
(JEREMY): We win!
I'm in the wedding party. I hope.
I don't wanna presume. Ahh!
(JEREMY LAUGHING)
I love you.
I love you too.
on "Wynonna Earp"...
I will do anything to get her back.
I did something terrible
when you were in the Garden.
- (NEDLEY): Some kind of hex?
- To the end of the Earps.
The Clantons were dickheads.
They murdered people,
- stole their land.
- We're in a war, Holliday.
It's just a town. Them
women would have us
- both fight to the death.
- Peacemaker, come!
I want the woman in the painting.
- (BOTH): Rosita?!
- We need to focus on a cure.
Where we drown you in salted holy water.
I love you.
Hey, I know how this looks,
but I'm asking you to trust us.
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
Oh!
Okay, that's cold.
How you doing?
Like I'm about 35 shades of grey.
Is this much kink
necessary to break a spell?
Technically it's an exorcism. So... yep.
Also, who was it that cursed you again?
The... (GAGGING)
Jeremy, you know I can't
say it without barfing frogs!
Sorry. Just, final test...
before you temporarily drown.
Super temporarily.
Once the hourglass runs
out, we bring you back,
spell's broken, and we all go out
for veggie burgers and flies... fries.
Fries. Here.
Oh, she's froggin' gorgeous.
Well, I picked the cutest,
deadest one in the bucket.
Let's hop to it.
Grab that hex and ribbit right out!
If you guys are gonna to keep this up,
would you drown me instead?
We wouldn't be doing this
if we weren't sure it would work.
Yeah. And if we didn't
have any other options.
Okay. So we're gonna
monitor your vitals.
Leave everything to magic,
nothing to chance.
(BEEPING)
- You ready?
- Well, I'd rather not
keep barfing frogs and
trying to kill my friends.
So, yeah.
Okay. Once you're under,
your consciousness should
transfer to the frog.
Two will become one.
My favorite Spice Girls song.
It's gotta be a good sign!
One with the frog.
Okay...
(BEEPING)
- Hey.
- Hey.
No matter what happens,
don't let me come up
until it's done. Okay?
Okay.
And guys... Thank you.
Okay.
(BREATHING DEEPLY)
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
(CHANTING INCANTATION)
(CHANTING CONTINUES)
(BEEPING)
Okay, okay.
Her heart rate's
slowing down. Okay, good.
Good.
(GASPING)
Oh no. Her survival
instincts are kicking in!
Sorry, Nicole, either I kill you now,
or you kill me later!
Keep incantating!
(CHANTING CONTINUES)
(INTENSE MUSIC)
(CONTINUOUS BEEP)
Okay. It's done.
(CHANTING)
Jeremy! What the hell are you doing?
Oh no.
Okay, I know how this looks,
but I'm asking you to trust us.
(OMINOUS MUSIC)
Waverly! Don't interfere!
I'm gonna interfere
with your friggin' face!
What the hell did you do?
Is she dead?
Technically...
- (FROG CROAKS)
- Yes! It worked!
- It worked!
- What? What worked?
Can't you see? She's in the frog!
You put my girlfriend into a frog?
And you're welcome.
(HAWK SCREECHING)
Dead? Not quite.
(CHUCKLING)
Testing our bonds, are you?
Well, it ain't that easy, Missy.
What I gave, I can take.
Yes. That will do.
(CHUCKLING)
An eye for an eye, a
breath for a breath,
seek and destroy, and
be joined in death.
_
(WHISTLING)
(GROWLING)
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
Waverly Earp.
Onward, my boy.
♪ 'Cause I gave you all I got to give ♪
♪ I know that ain't no way to live ♪
♪ So I told that devil ♪
♪ To take you back ♪
♪ I told that devil ♪
♪ To take you back ♪
- It was her idea!
- What was?!
Handcuffing you to
the bed, the exorcism.
She knew you'd try and stop her.
- (NEDLEY CHANTING)
- Look. According to the Maglu,
if we can't destroy the spell-caster,
then we must cleanse the
one who's been cursed.
What, by drowning her?!
Temporarily.
Waves, as long as she stays
in the frog, she's okay.
She's not a strong swimmer.
Once the timer runs out,
the hex will be broken,
and we'll slowly revive her
without risking brain damage.
(FROG CROAKING)
If you want to help,
just watch the frog.
(CHANTING CONTINUES)
Okay...
Hi, sweetie-pie, it's me.
Are you really in there?
(FROG CROAKING, WAVERLY GASPS)
(CROAKING)
Rosita?! Of all the Revenants
who could have survived,
it's busty, brainy,
baby-stealing Ro-fucking-sita?
- So this is it.
- This is what?
Seventy-six down, one to go.
You're gonna kill me
last, like you said.
- Done.
- There will be no killing.
As much as I also crave
the satisfaction...
We need you alive.
It's your lucky day.
- Come on.
- I can't, dummies!
Look, a year ago, maybe
more, there was this rumble,
some kind of earthquake.
Yeah. It was a doozy, we were all shook.
You remember Creepy Phil?
The Revenant with all the boils?
For reasons that are
unimportant right now,
he rounded up a posse to hunt me down.
Did you steal his baby too?
I slept with his wife.
How nefarious.
I for one would love to hear more.
(CHUCKLING)
(CLEARING THROAT)
So, I ran to the only place
that I thought I'd be safe.
This outcropping?
Revenants said stepping
on it made you feel
like you were turning inside out.
But I've always had
a high pain tolerance.
Doc, you know that.
Anyway, I ran here,
with Phil and his posse
right on my tail, and
the rumbling got louder,
and then all of the Revenants...
poofed, one by one.
Leaving you with boil-faced Phil
on inside-out-Island.
Yeah. Except something changed.
We couldn't feel the pain anymore.
And then Phil got handsy, so...
I kicked the bastard in the throat,
he fell off the rock, and poof,
disappeared with the rest of them.
Yeah, he did! Forget Phil.
Look, it doesn't take a genius,
although I actually am one,
to figure out if he
poofed, then so would I.
Look, it's been great catching up,
but I can't leave this island.
Now what?
Tie her up and hope she
doesn't spontaneously combust?
I don't need to know what
you two got up to in the sack.
- Look.
- Ammolite.
Revenant Kryptonite.
This rock formation hurt Revenants
before the curse was broken.
So now, it must protect them.
If there's more, we can get...
(MOCKINGLY): ... Rosita off the island.
- The tribe has spoken.
- Tribe?
Just find more rainbow rocks
before I change my mind
and break her silky smooth neck.
(TENSE MUSIC)
Pick up, pick up, pick up!
(VOICEMAIL): Hi, this is Waverly!
Leave a message, and I'll ring-a-ding
- you right back!
- Oh shit... Ahh!
Look what I got here.
The little Earp lover.
Poking her nose where it don't belong.
- Who sent you?
- Get bent.
- Was it Holliday?
- It was nobody! Let me go!
Sorry, Miss, no can do.
You brought this on yourself.
What are you going to do?
I need to make a call! Stop it!
Okay, her temperature is stable.
Her heartbeat's been stopped
for almost five minutes.
Waverly? How much more time?
I don't know, forever?
- Next time, I'll get quicksand.
- (NEDLEY CHANTING)
Wait! Okay! It's done. It's done!
What, is the spell broken? Is she free?
We won't know until she wakes up.
- You can that stop now.
- Oh. Thank Christ.
And start the reversal incantation.
- Reversal?
- Yeah, we have to get her
out of the frog, and back into her body.
Can I at least get a... Oh. Thank you.
Please guys, hurry!
(NEDLEY CHANTING)
What are you waiting for!?
She's definitely gonna punch me.
- Jeremy!
- No! Don't use those on her!
- Why not?
- Of course,
- because of the water!
- You can't paddle a flat-liner,
- Dr. Dingus!
- Well okay, then what do I do?
(OMINOUS MUSIC)
What was that?
I don't know. The wind?
(FROG CROAKING)
Waverly?
I've been marked.
(SCREAMING)
(SCREAMING)
Billy! You're a Reaper now?
- What do you want?
- I don't know.
- To bring back Nicole's vitals!
- Not you! The Reaper!
(REAPER SCREECHING)
What the hell are you doing?
Can't you see it? Oh,
the fudging Clantons!
I've been marked! (SCREAMING)
Oh, guys?
- It... She got out.
- No, please!
No, no, no, no! Nicole?!
Nicole! Whatever happens,
stay in that frog!
Please!
(SCREECHING, SCREAMING)
Okay! Oh, hey, hi, Nicole!
Oh, you're so cute. Okay.
No, no.
(REAPER SCREECHING)
Okay, I got you, Nicole.
Oh! Argh! Nicole! Come back here!
Please, please! No!
(CROAKING)
(WAVERLY): No!
(INTENSE MUSIC)
(PANTING)
Holy shit!
Did you stop it?
Maybe?
No, baby. I did.
That's it?
There isn't much.
Ammolite is a rarity.
How are we gonna get her
all the way back to the sanctuary?
Back stone moves to front. Repeat.
Alright.
Rosita? Follow the path.
The ammolite will keep you safe.
Yeah. From searing agony, or you?
The rumbling you heard was Bulshar
ending the curse, alright?
There's no Earp vs.
Revenant thing anymore.
We're good. We don't need to fight.
It was your baby too.
I suppose you did what
you did to survive.
And I forgive you.
Totes. Water under
the bridge. (CHUCKLING)
Yeah, mega convincing.
I can smell the grudge on you
like stale beer and Bubba Kush.
That's actually the smell of
my house almost burning down.
Pinky swear you won't hurt me.
- How old are you?
- Pinky swear!
Oh, my God.
We hereby pinky swear
that we'll not harm a hair on your head.
Or anywhere else on my body.
The devil's in the details!
Alright, whatever.
Come on.
Okay.
(EXHALING)
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
(GASPING)
Oh, my God. I did it!
(LAUGHING)
And I don't feel anything.
Oh, thank you!
Oh! Whoa!
God, I forgot how good you smell.
Thanks.
Wait, careful!
Can't have you poofing out on us.
Okay.
(BELLS CHIMING)
What is that?
The Celtic Sisters knot
has appeared once more.
It's a shortcut. You coming?
To be among a plethora of women scorned?
Doubt I'd be welcome, long as
I got Richard and The Twins.
Alright. On three we step through.
Wait, what, women scorned?
And three!
(PHONE RINGING)
Sheriff Clayborn?
To what do I owe the pleasure?
Okay, so we have to figure
out which frog she's in.
Can we talk about this outfit?
This would be so much
easier if frogs had hair.
Come on, baby, just give me a sign!
- I'm trying.
- A few more minutes,
and she's gonna have
permanent brain damage.
Much more, and it'll be too late.
Okay, well...
- Should I kiss them?
- Worth a shot.
Uh, no! No, it is not!
I am not in the frog!
Okay, come here, little princess.
Just keep your tongue to yourself, okay?
(FROG CROAKING)
(SMOOCHING)
Okay. Did it.
- Yeah.
- Think she liked it?
Yeah, definitely.
Ah. So gross.
Alright, Sister Granny
Panties! Here she be.
A woman scorned.
My, you've done well, Wynonna Earp.
Well, you want worthy,
you come to the best.
She's all yours.
- Hand over Peacemaker.
- What the hell?!
You're trading me?
It's better than killing you.
Forgiveness?
Well now look who's carrying a grudge.
My gun?
What are they gonna do with me?
I didn't ask.
I just need to save my friend.
There was a time I thought
you and I were friends.
Rosita, it's just survival.
Why does it always involve
women betraying women?
Just as I had hoped.
There is something between you.
Something delicious.
The derision. The disdain.
It would be a shame to waste it.
Lady, if shame's what you're after,
I've got three seasons of
Flavor of Love on DVD, okay?
I don't give a rat's ass about Rosita,
I just want my gun.
And you shall have it.
And a step closer to
salvation. If you live.
- What?
- What?
- (BELL RINGING)
- Battle to the death!
(TENSE MUSIC)
Okay, alright. Listen.
Sure we've had our ishes,
but there's no way we're gonna...
(ALL SHOUTING)
♪ Here, kitty, kitty,
kitty, where'd you go ♪
Ahh!
What happened to women betraying women?
I saw an opening, I jumped on it!
I'll say, you're like
a sexy spider monkey!
- You lied!
- I promised not to hurt you.
So help me God! I'm
trying to keep my word!
Enough talk! Give in to
what you desire. Fight!
- (NUNS SHOUTING)
- You know what? Fuck it!
If I have to go through you
to get Peacemaker, I will.
I've fended off death for 140 years.
I'm great at not dying.
Then remove those tacky-ass hoops.
Oh yeah?
Bring it.
(CHEERING)
(GRUNTING)
Bitch, I have a lifetime
of settling arguments
with my fists and level three
BBD hand-to-hand combat.
And I got a big ole boot.
Son of a bitch!
(FROG CROAKING)
- Well?
- Nope.
- I'm not feelin' it.
- That was the last one.
I can't believe she's not
trying to give us a sign.
There's never a damn pottery
wheel when you need one!
Ugh! I am! I just don't
know the rules of Ghost!
Um...
Okay, what if...
(GASPS)
(BUZZING)
(GASPS)
Okay.
Oh, man. Now what is with this light?
Oh, God, I'm gonna have a seizure.
That's a pattern. That could be a code.
You're right! Morse code!
Yes! Baby, you never
cease to surprise me.
Okay. Uh... N.
N... O... T. Not.
I...
N...
F... R...
O... G.
No, no, that's a B. Not in frob?
- Ugh! Close enough!
- Close enough!
Okay, geez! She's not in the frog.
But she is still here, right? Somewhere.
Astral-projection.
People say it can occur near death.
Happened to me, my third heart attack.
Found my remote on top of the fridge.
Okay. Nicole, we can
hear you! What do we do?
(BUZZING)
B... A...
S... E...
- M... E...
- Basement. Basement.
Yeah. She wants us to go down there.
W-With the Reaper?
But that's insane! Nicole,
is that what you're saying?
D... U... H.
Well, that's her, alright.
Okay.
So you're gonna chat with
Nicole, through a creeper?
Reaper.
Someone in this room
made it their bitch,
and then tossed it down the stairs,
and I think that someone
was a ginger goddess.
Besides, anyone got a better idea?
Okay. I'll have to lower her
body temp to buy some time.
Like a frog hibernating in winter.
Slowing down bodily functions
to prevent cell deterioration.
- Great.
- But, if we lose the body,
I don't know what happens to the spirit.
- Ready?
- Yep.
Good luck.
- Come on.
- I have no fucking clue
what's happening here,
but when in doubt...
(SNARLING)
Nice Reaper.
(GROWLING)
Billy, what did they do to you?
(DEEP VOICE): Gave me the
might of a thousand ancestors.
Nicole?
Are you... Are you in the Reaper?
(NICOLE): Tell her why I did it.
Tell her why I made
the deal with the witch!
Yes, tell me.
(DEEP VOICE): You will now die!
I've got him dead-to-rights!
- Maybe.
- No! Don't shoot!
It's Nicole now!
I thought she was a goddamn frog!
She is a frog, and dead!
And also a Reaper. Stay
with the plot, Nedley!
Nicole, you are gonna
tell me everything.
Because if I you don't, the
love of my life might die,
and I'll get very angry,
and I don't even know
what might happen if I get very angry.
- Got it?
- (SNARLING)
(CHEERING)
To the death! Or you'll never
see your little toy again!
You know what? If you
had your own little toy,
maybe you wouldn't be so uptight!
Can you believe this shit?
(GRUNTING)
(CHEERING, SHOUTING)
You're all out of tricks, Earp.
- Not quite.
- Ahh!
Oh!
- Thank you, Dolls.
- (LAUGHING)
Why are you playing the old hag's game?
I am a survivor.
Last words that'll look super
ironic on your tombstone.
The more you choke, the harder I get.
Okay, boner.
Finish her!
- Demon nun.
- Of course.
- Ugh...
- Listen.
- Yeah?
- We don't find my gun,
- we're both dead.
- Okay.
Is that a Hemsworth in biking shorts?
A Xena reboot!
That's nice!
After them!
(DEEP VOICE): She's
ours. We have her soul.
She made a covenant. A life for a life.
W-Why would she...
Why would you make a deal
with the friggin' Clantons?
I didn't know it was them, okay?
I waited 18 months. I was desperate.
I should have believed
that you'd find a way home.
I'm sorry.
You will eat your own.
And I'm about to make
you eat baseball bat!
So how do we break the covenant?
Impossible!
The Swamp Witch has bound her.
The covenant only ends
when both actors die.
One down, one to go.
I will fix this, Nicole.
No. Baby, stop.
We are many.
I'll take my chances, thanks.
(GRUNTING)
(PANTING)
(DOOR CLOSING)
How many?
(GROWLING)
Do not let that thing out.
Gonna need Annabelle.
What? Where are you going?
To have a little chat
with the Swamp Witch.
This ain't no talking stick.
I'm coming with you.
Randy, there's a Reaper in the basement,
and my girlfriend is being
shocked like French beans.
Margo-Jean's son is the Sheriff.
There are still laws.
Well, if Mam Clanton
put the spell on her,
it might be the only way.
(SOFT MUSIC)
Nicole?
You saved my life.
Now it's my turn.
Okay, so as soon as Wynonna gets back
- with Peacemaker we...
- We don't have time!
Your plan didn't work!
Nicole wouldn't want it this way.
If I don't end Mam Clanton,
there might not be a
Nicole to want anything.
Keep her alive. For as long as you can.
(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)
(SHIVERING)
You'll be safe in here.
Yeah, sure. Which one of
these pointy-shooty things
are you gonna kill me with?
Depends.
You gotten enough off
your ample, perfect chest?
Guess we can call a truce.
Good.
'Cause I am sick and goddamn tired
of being told who to kill.
It's bad enough I have the
Clantons halfway up my hoop,
I don't need beef with you too.
- Clantons?
- (NUNS SHOUTING)
(DOORS RATTLING)
Grab something.
And keep an eye out
for a big-ass Buntline.
She is lying.
Gen Z knows more than she
says, we cannot let her live!
Just stay out of it, Cleo.
- Holt, we...
- Mr. Holliday! Come on in.
Well, go figure. Someone
does care about you.
You owe me five bucks.
Take it out of whatever
it's gonna cost me
to bail you out.
I'm not interested in your money.
Well then, what do you propose?
- Ooh! Dance-off. Let's do this.
- You can have this back.
Now go out there and
stare at it for a while.
I wanted to talk to you, man to man.
I've been thinking about what you said.
The blood we shed damns us all.
I'm tired, Holliday.
I'm tired of this fight.
Having a beef with enemies,
people that I barely even know,
because my ancestors
lost an unfair shootout.
No disrespect,
but your ancestors
were drunken assholes.
- As were your friends, and...
- I was their Asshole King.
But people can change.
I believe that.
I got a job now. Where
I can do some real good.
And... there's a woman
who works at the diner.
And I would love nothing
more than to be able
to invite her out to dinner at Shorty's.
And not have to worry about an Earp
shooting me in the back.
So...
We set enmity aside
for the sake of those
that bear our name, present and future?
Not the past?
I am damn near 170 years old, Sheriff.
The past is but a burden.
What's done is done.
And as for Rachel?
Well, she made Billy happy.
He was a...
He is a good kid.
He's never been poisoned
by the Clanton hate.
I believe it was the
Bard that wrote about
two love-struck kids
subverting a family vendetta.
Let us hope it's not too late
to give their story a happier ending.
I will bring our
proposition to Margo-Jean,
if you bring it to the Earps.
Thank you, Doc Holliday.
(CHUCKLING) That still sounds weird.
Well, let this be the beginning
of a new chronicle...
Our own.
(SIGHS)
No magic gun? Sword?
Hmm. No. No ammo either.
Overcompensating battle axe it is.
(CHOIR SINGING)
The falsetto fuck is that noise?
It's a requiem.
A mass for the dead.
Of whom I'm glad you're not one?
Oh, grammar.
You surviving makes me feel decent.
I don't play well with the other gals,
but we could've hung out.
Well, up until you...
Look, if the Earp Curse
is done, Wynonna,
then why do you still need Peacemaker?
Because my work isn't done.
(THUDDING ON DOOR)
(NUN): Open the door!
And neither is yours!
(CHOIR CONTINUES SINGING)
With your holier-than-thou attitude,
deciding who gets to
wield your rusty ass!
You think I'm not worthy?
Judgy tool!
You're the one hiding
like a little bitch!
(SHOUTING, LAUGHING)
Wynonna! They're coming!
The curse may be over,
but you know what?
Our enemies won't stop coming
just because we want them to!
And I know you want what I want!
(THUDDING ON DOOR)
To keep kicking evil ass.
Enough bullshit!
(CHOIR CONTINUES SINGING)
I do what needs to be
done because I'm a hero!
You know what, yeah,
sometimes... that makes me a killer.
If you won't fight,
you're both going to die!
(RESONATING)
(CHOIR CONTINUES)
Holy fuck.
Come to Mamma.
Hey, sexy.
(INTENSE CHOIR MUSIC)
(SIGHS)
Missed you too.
I am Medea.
Granddaughter of Helios.
Trifle with a woman
scorned at your own peril.
Man-made weapons?
(LAUGHING)
(DEEP VOICE): We keep
them here so you fools
won't harm yourself.
You wanna tell her?
Nah.
(GUN CLICKING)
Make your peace.
Fool.
(GUNSHOT)
That felt good.
Wynonna...
Maybe we should have
thought this one through.
You have freed us.
We are at your service.
Okay.
The Clantons are the dimwits
of the Earp legend, right?
Do you really think
Sheriff Creepy-Uncle-Vibe
is going to get Crazy Witch
to just forgive and forget?
These matters are best left to adults,
not youngins that've
recently been heartbroken
by a certain young swain.
(RACHEL SCOFFS): Swain?
Doc, I think they killed Billy!
Killed him? Their own kin?
I went to go find him, but
all I saw was his psycho mom
dripping blood on rocks, and
talking shit about Waverly.
- Where is she?
- She ain't answering my calls.
Now where are we going?
You are going home.
I am going to play consigliere.
Is there a single Old
around here that can answer
a simple question?
You have broken Medea's hold over us!
We are eternally thankful!
- Glad to be of help.
- Will you lead us?
Will you show us how to become cleansed?
(LAUGHING) Hells no.
Sister fact: nobody here is
more tainted than this guy.
Okay? Max taint all over this.
And I'm fine with that.
You guys, you're liberated. Go.
Taint yourselves. Taint.
We can't go.
Not without the pain.
Joanne? Is that you?
And Alma?
You know these wenches?
Yeah. Some of them.
From a long time ago.
Victims of Wyatt Earp.
Huh. America's most beloved executioner.
(SIGHS) He was such a dick.
- How did he... ?
- Collateral damage.
Wrong place, wrong time. Cursed once,
but protected here, it seems.
I'll get you out.
All of you.
Okay, there's gotta be
a way to set you free.
Dude, we all don't have
to be like you to be free.
This place is an upgrade on a rock.
Plus...
They seem nice.
Oh...
Yes, they do.
Alright, well if it makes
you happy, you do you.
(CHUCKLING) And you, and you, and you.
- Thanks for saving my ass.
- Well, be a shame not to.
(CHUCKLING)
Oh, wait.
I need to tell you something.
Do you know why I tried to steal Alice?
(CLEARING THROAT) Insurance against
being Peacemakered to hell?
And I...
had a buyer for your baby.
Margo-Jean Clanton.
Just...
- I thought you should know.
- I gotta go.
- Uh...
- (BELLS RINGING)
We don't have to hug.
(NEDLEY CHANTING)
- What's the tea?
- Uh...
Oh, good. A rock with a C on it.
- Who's been marked?
- Waverly.
She's on her way to
Magpie Ranch right now.
With a shotgun.
Then so are we.
Space, the funnest frontier?
(SIGHS)
God, what a dump.
OCD kicking in. Fight it, Waves.
You're not my Amazon delivery.
(GUN CLICKING)
You frogged my girlfriend.
I'll give you one chance to fix it
before I give you a buckshot face lift.
Sweetie, I can't fix it.
That's not how a vendetta works.
We're Capulets and Montagues.
Hatfields and McCoys.
Earps and Clantons.
You should thank me.
How do you think you
knew what door to take
out of the Garden? Gumption?
(LAUGHING) Oh, that
girl begged me, so...
I showed John Henry the way.
A blood feud can create a powerful bond,
even in between spiritual planes.
(LAUGHING) Oh, but she was feeble.
"Oh, please!
Help bring my angel
back, I'll do anything!"
- What did she do?
- She made a deal.
Doc comes back, with you in tow,
and Ms. Haught delivers him to me.
Doc? What the hell do you want with him?
He took everything from us.
At the O.K. Corral.
But I will ruin him,
his name, his reputation.
I will make him destroy
everything he loves.
You basic bitch!
Who gives a flippin' fudge
about the O.K. Corral anymore?!
If you don't release Nicole, she'll die!
You're young. You'll find someone else.
I'd rather die.
Then you'll be together.
(WAVERLY SCREAMING)
My ancestors will devour her.
I have powers you cannot comprehend!
Same, same, bitch.
(SIZZLING)
(GASPING, SCREAMING)
What did I do?
(GASPING)
(COUGHING)
- Holy crap.
- Nicole?
Blink once if you can hear me.
Why blink when I can talk?
Oh!
King of the Incantations!
It was the Swamp Witch.
- Jeremy, I'm so sorry.
- No, no, no, no.
At least you're not barfing
up a pond full of frogs!
You go, girl!
Okay, we need to warm her up slowly
to prevent cardiac arrest.
Get some blankets.
I am so glad that you didn't croak.
Yeah, but I frogged up... bad.
Hey. It's just what happens
when we're not all together.
Now...
Come here. Oh!
Oh!
(VEHICLE APPROACHING)
(BRAKES SQUEALING)
Wynonna.
Waves?
What happened, baby girl?
I think I goofed real bad.
Oh, I just heard from
Jeremy. Whatever you did,
it saved Nicole from frog-barf-o-rama!
She's okay? Oh, my God, it worked.
- More good news.
- Peacemaker?! How? What?
Long story.
We have had ourselves a day.
Hey!
Don't you fucking move!
You murdered my mother?!
Why? Why?!
I don't... I don't know. I'm sorry.
We had one chance to end this, Earp.
One goddamn chance.
And now there's nothing you can do
to right the wrongs of the O.K. Corral.
Oh, my God, get over it!
Your sicko witch mom had it coming.
You make your peace, Earp.
(GUNSHOT)
Lower your weapons!
Stand down!
Go ahead and off this
son of a bitch, Doc.
It's too late, Holliday.
It's too late.
It is never too late...
to bury a grudge.
Doc.
I'm the Clanton heir now.
Ex-squeeze me? That's
kind of an exclusive title.
- I got no choice.
- The one thing...
I have learned from Wynonna,
is there is always...
another way to confront a problem.
Whatever you may be up against,
we can work this out
for the good of our kin.
Together.
Like we agreed.
(BOTH): You agreed?
Billy's gone.
Mam turned him.
He didn't deserve it.
A lot of innocents have
fallen victim to this feud.
(CRYING)
And your family has
borne more than its share
of the burden.
(SOFT MUSIC)
Let us get a drink.
(GUNSHOT, GRUNTS)
(SOFT MUSIC)
Thanks for distracting him.
How is she?
Not so hot, but...
Alive and gargling buckets of mouthwash.
What you did, Wynonna...
It was so wrong.
- I believed in Holt.
- So did I.
He was right, they never
would've stopped coming for us.
There ain't a lick of honor
in shooting a man in the back.
(SIGHS)
My whole life...
demons, townspeople, enemies,
have tormented me and my family, okay?
I have had to kill again and again,
just to live another day, Doc.
Do you think I give a shit about honor?
You have had to do those things
because of Wyatt Earp.
Yeah. You were his best friend!
- I was.
- I think you're just pissed
'cause he told the truth
about you in that video.
You think that was the truth about me?
Maybe.
Do you want me just to say it, Henry?
I like you because you're not perfect.
You're all busted up inside, like me.
I do not want to be, anymore.
- Must be nice to have a choice.
- You have a choice, Wynonna!
Did you ever wonder why the Clantons
never turned Revenant?
It's because, yes, I had to
clean up Wyatt Earp's mess
when he shot and he ran.
At the O.K. Corral?
I killed them.
Doc. I never run.
And I never will.
(SOFT MUSIC)
I guess you and that
gun deserve each other.
It was the Clantons who wanted Alice.
- Are you coming in?
- Yeah.
I'm not much in the mood, darlin'.
Please. I'd like you both to be here.
(EERIE MUSIC)
To our first and
hopefully last exorcism!
Yes!
(DOOR CLOSING)
Oh, God. Hey!
I told you! Never leave the frog.
Okay, I will add it to my
ever-growing list of apologies.
Fun new rule: from now on,
nobody brings themselves
to the brink of death
to fix a silly mistake.
- Oh, I'll drink to that.
- Uh, no you won't.
Okay...
- No.
- (RACHEL SCOFFS)
- Nikki-Nikki-Nine-Door?
- Oh, God, no.
I am recovering from severe hypothermia.
Yes, doctor's orders.
Okay, I'll take one for you.
Are you two okay?
We're the same.
Ugh! Hey, Nic-averly!
Are you two young, sexy smoke shows
- getting married, or what?
- Dude.
- Jeremy!
- Ugh, what?!
What have you been doing all this time?
Okay, I mean, I get
it, I get it, you know,
in the Garden for 18 months,
defeating a shape shifter,
protecting the homestead,
a lot of lonely trapping, um...
Yeah, never mind, I'll shut up now.
(NEDLEY LAUGHING)
- Actually, I did...
- Well actually, I did have...
(BOTH): ... planned.
You did?
Me too.
♪ My heart, it was so numb ♪
♪ But now I can feel ♪
♪ It feels like I'm falling ♪
♪ And I don't know where ♪
♪ But I'm spinning with you, love ♪
♪ So I don't even care ♪
Waverly Earp...
Please.
Let me.
♪ Stalling ♪
♪ Falling ♪
♪ Calling ♪
♪ All in ♪
Nicole Haught.
Will you marry me?
Yes.
Yes. (LAUGHING)
Yes, I'll marry you.
Ah! Yes!
Yes! (LAUGHING)
Girls!
- Finally.
- Yay.
(JEREMY): We win!
I'm in the wedding party. I hope.
I don't wanna presume. Ahh!
(JEREMY LAUGHING)
I love you.
I love you too.