Wonder Woman (1975–1979): Season 3, Episode 22 - The Man Who Could Not Die - full transcript

It's already twenty after eight.

I'm supposed to report to work
in 40 minutes.

Where's work?

- Downtown LA. Be careful.
- It's rush hour, lady.

'It'll take you half hour long
just to get to the freeway.'

Great. Is that the last of it
except the piano?

Good, 'cause
I'm really in a hurry.

Come on.

It's tough all over, guys.

Oh, where did he come from?

No idea. Must have escaped
from a zoo or something.



'I can't believe it.'

I bet he's worth some money.

Here, monkey, monkey.

Come on, fellow.

Come to Uncle Max.

Hey, what're you doing?

Don't chase him.
You're just making him run.

Come on, come on, come on!
Hey, monkey! Hey, monkey!

Come here. Come back here.
Come back here. Come back.

'Come here.
Come here, boy. Hey!'

- Here, monkey.
- Come on. Come on.

- Come back here. Oh!
- Come here.

'Look out!'

'Oh, no!'



Oh!

Why did you guys
have to chase him?

How come he isn't lying there
in a hundred little pieces?

It's a very good question.

Uh, I think he just said,
"Welcome to LA," lady.

♪ Wonder Woman ♪

♪ Wonder Woman ♪

♪ Wonder Woman ♪

♪ Wonder Woman ♪

♪ Wonder Woman ♪♪

You're Prince?

Diana Prince.
You must be Dale Hawthorn.

So, you're the agent
Washington summoned?

Yeah, listen, I'm sorry I'm late

but between tryin' to move
into my new house

and trying to..

Is something wrong?

Last week, the guys in the lab
put sandpaper

in my salami sandwiches.

You wanna do me a favor?

Go downstairs to the lab,
tell them the joke's over

send up the real Agent Prince.

You know something?

I'd really like to find out
what you do for a livin'

'but I don't have the time.'

Mr. Hawthorn.

Uh, y-you must be the real
Agent Prince, huh?

Mr. Hawthorn.

My name is Diana Prince

and I have been transferred
to your field office.

This may come
as a surprise to you

but not all government agents
wear polyester.

Carol!

My name is Dr. Akers

and I'm looking for someone
by the name of Prince.

Prince.
Right there with the monkey.

- Ah, a chimpanzee.
- It's Diana Prince.

Come in, doctor.

I take it,
this is your monkey?

Well, a chimpanzee.

Oh, Tobias!

Look at you!

According to his tag

he's registered to you
for research.

Yeah, I was involved
in a joint project

but my partner and I split up

and Tobias went with him.

But, uh,
somebody must have forgot

to lock the door, hey, Toby?
Toby..

What kind of research
were you involved in, doctor?

Ah, why do you ask that?

Well, Tobias
is a little peculiar.

He doesn't seem to need food
or water.

Never gets tired.

And I wanna show you
something else.

'He's not only impervious
to pain'

but to any
and all physical injury.

He's invulnerable, doctor.

And I think
that we ought to hear

about your research.

Yeah.

This way.

'I worked for Joseph Reichman
on government-funded research'

into the aging process.

Now, they said
that he was brilliant.

Well, I soon found out
that he was insane.

He was, uh, obsessed with
control and domination.

What he was really after

was to create this army
of invulnerable men

'with which to take over
this country'

and someday the world.

- What?
- Yeah. For certain.

You see, Reichman and I
are molecular biologists

but we have
different approaches.

Now, Reichman's specialty
is radiation

which I know very little.

And mine has to do
with injections

of a chemical mixture
known only to me.

Now collectively..

...we were headed
for a fantastic breakthrough.

'Until a month ago
when I saw the real Reichman'

'and what he was after.'

And then I broke off with him.

But..

Stupid.

I left behind
in the laboratory..

...three syringes.

Three!

Now, maybe he's tried to make
a chimpanzee invulnerable.

But d-do you think that
he would really--

Yeah, that would be his
next step with the syringes.

Finding and using
a human guinea pig.

Come on, will you, Candle?

You make the rest of the faculty
look anemic.

Look at this,
you're not even sweating.

And as for your pulse rate

it's just over 50.

'You've been exercising
for half an hour.'

'And that, even for
an ex-football player'

'is not normal.'

Come on, Candle.
Tell me, what's your secret?

Well, I volunteered

for some research
a couple of weeks ago.

I can always use
the extra money.

Ah, the guy's into gerontology,
you know, study of aging.

And you're getting injections?

Yeah, and radiation.

Ah, you know,
they're experimenting

with the oxidation process
or something like that.

- I don't know.
- Who?

Dr. Reichman.

Look, it's government-funded
research

and the guy came out of the Army
Medical Corps, for Pete's sake.

'I wanna be there
when you see him again.'

'I'd like to know exactly
what he's doin' to you.'

You wanna know somethin' else?

I haven't eaten or drunk
anything for two days.

Haven't slept, either.

Now you call me before you go.
You hear?

- You're just jealous.
- It's not normal.

Don't touch him!
You, call an ambulance!

Prepare for head injuries
and a possible broken neck!

- I'm alright.
- Bryce, stay where you are.

Don't move.

Alright. I'm fine.
Really, I'm fine.

- Bryce!
- I said, I'm okay.

- You're Agent Prince?
- Diana Prince.

For about the 15th time today.
And who are you?

T. Burton Phipps III.

And if this is the way

the Feds are lookin'
in Washington

then better call
my travel agent, but quick.

Is there something I can do
for you, T. Burton Phipps?

The Third. Ah, T. for short.

Going home for the evening?

Well, no.
I've got some work to do.

Had dinner yet?

No, I actually haven't had time.

Ah, yes, the magic words.

What'll it be?

Ta-da!

'What'll it be?'

Well, uh...how about an apple?

Jonathan or Golden Delicious?

Oh, either one is fine.

Okay, um..

Golden Delicious. 50 cents.

Fifty cents for an apple?

At the store it costs
a third of that.

If you had time.

Me, I've got nothing but time.

And a horrendous overhead cost

and it somehow comes out
to 50 cents.

Somehow.

Fifty cents. There you go.

Thank you.

No, no, no.

Mr. Phipps.

Mr. Phipps, how many times
have I told you

to confine
your capitalistic adventures

to the corridors
and not in my office?

Exactly 31.

- Thirty-one?
- Hmm.

Then for the 32nd time,
get out of here.

A pleasure
transacting with you, D.P.

Oh, thank you, Mr. T.

Ah, as for you..

Wait. Oh, oh, oh.
Don't rush. Don't rush.

I'm gonna kill him.
Someday I'm gonna kill that kid.

Well, if he's the third

I'm glad I'm spared
the first and second.

- We got problems.
- What's that?

Reichman's disappeared.
I notified the police.

That means national security
is involved

and that means we're involved.

Well, I'm supposed to meet Akers
at the lab

where he and Reichman conducted
their research together

in about 45 minutes.

Ah, excuse me, I'm looking
for a Dr. Reichman.

Ah, so am I, young man.

We go together?

I've been trying to call him
all day.

Yeah?

Well, he's gone.

Well, he'll be back, won't he?

That all depends
on what he's left behind.

What is it you must..

...talk to him about?

You're on fire!

Don't worry about me,
just get him out of here.

- Are you alright?
- Yeah.

I'm gonna put you
under 24-hour guard.

Reichman wants you
out of the way.

Maybe, but it is my guess
that he blew the lab apart

to destroy any record of his
contribution to the process.

But, from what Wonder Woman
told Diana

he's already created
his first invulnerable human.

Yeah.

Yes, but he still needs
Dr. Akers

to recreate
his chemical mixture.

Now, this was salvaged
from that lab.

Looks to me like a list of names

maybe subjects
for Reichman's experiments?

It's possible,
but I've never seen this before.

Well, one of these names
could be the man

Wonder Woman saw.

Could be.

Let me ask you a question.

If you were Reichman, where
would you solicit volunteers?

The university.

That's a good point.

I'm going to call over
to admissions right now

and tell 'em you're comin'.

- Thank you.
- Diana...do me a favor, huh?

I know you don't like
to be told what to do.

But in this case, I'd really
like you to be careful.

'Well, well.
So, this is Agent Prince.'

Real cover girl, isn't she?

She's supposed to be the cream
of the IADC's crop.

What a pity.

Within 24 hours, she will have
died an untimely death.

- Right, Mr. Dupris?
- Yes, sir.

Better than any timepiece
invented, this one is.

I'd feel a lot better
if he didn't come lookin'

for people when he gets hungry.

You're in no danger
as long as he knows you.

It is strangers who could
and have become free meals.

You are correct in maintaining
a healthy respect for him.

Power must always be respected.

You are as afraid of him
as the world will soon be

of Joseph Reichman.

Akers' notes.
I must have Akers' notes.

Without that formula for
the substance that he invented

it will take years before
I can duplicate my success

with Candle and the chimpanzee.

And a lot longer
before I can achieve my goal.

I have Akers' address
right here.

But word is that there are
two bodyguards on him.

'Are the people on this list
freshmen or grad students'

or faculty members or what?

I don't know.

Frankly, I'm not even sure
if the people on that list

are even connected
with the university.

But you expect to go through
our admissions files

and match one of these names
with a face in your head?

I expect to try.

Wow. You've got the needle,
we've got the haystack.

'What's worse, not all of our
applicants submit photographs.'

So even if these people
are students here

I can't guarantee
you'll be able to match a face.

I don't believe it.

The face is right there.

Why, that's Bryce Candle.

Used to be star
of the football team.

Now he's a professor here.

What does he teach?

Computer science, of all things.

Well, if you don't mind

I'd like his home address
and telephone number.

So would every woman
on this campus.

Bryce, how are you?

I've got a million questions
for you, doctor.

But I wanna know just one thing.

When will it wear off?

Why? Have my treatments
disagreed with you?

I don't eat. I don't sleep.
I don't feel pain.

I don't even get hurt
when a room blows up on my face.

I don't like it!

You want to suffer hunger?
You want to suffer pain?

You want to die?

Yeah, I do.

That's part of being alive

part of being human.

All I am now
is some kind of freak.

I didn't asked for this, doctor.

I want whatever you did to me
to end.

What I have done is rearranged
your molecular structure

halting those
biological processes

which result in the destruction
of cells and tissues

in ordinary people.

When will it wear off?

It cannot wear off.

The treatment
can only be reversed.

And I'm afraid, Bryce,
that there are certain things

you must do for me
before I reverse the treatment.

I'll go to the police.

You will not do anything,
save exactly what I tell you.

I won't be some kind of slave!

Oh, yes, indeed, you shall.

Or the treatment
will be permanent.

What do you want me to do?

Bryce, I have certain enemies.

One is an ex-colleague,
from whom

I am going to have you retrieve
extremely critical data.

The others are with the IADC.

If you ever make contact
with anyone there

you will never see me again.

Hi.

You leave your extra key
in exactly the same place

as one of my friends
used to leave theirs.

I apologize for using it
to get in

but it's really important
that I talk to you.

'My name is Diana Prince,
and I'm with the IADC.'

'Hey, wait! Hold it.'

Alright, professor

how about a little lesson
on Dr. Joseph Reichman?

Where is he
and what is he up to?

You have to answer me.

You have no choice.

Afraid not, Wonder Woman.

I guess there are advantages
to my condition, after all.

Seeing this is useless--

I would rather you keep it on

as you have this annoying
tendency to running off

'when people try
to talk to you.'

I'm not gonna run away.

You have my word on that.

The word of a fellow invincible.

Will you tell me the truth?

Yes.

Did you plant that bomb
in Reichman's lab?

No.

Do you know if he's created
any other people like you?

No, I'm sure he hasn't.

According to the man
who used to work with him

Dr. Reichman's ultimate goal
is to create an entire army

of invincibles just like you.

Look, Wonder Woman, I don't care
what Reichman is going to do.

All I care about
is what he did to me.

As far as I'm concerned,
I'm in this thing alone

and that's the way
I'm playing it.

Well, I'm sorry about that,
but if you change your mind

I believe Diana Prince left her
address up in your apartment.

She really wants to help you,
Bryce, and so do I.

I can handle the bodyguard,
Reichman.

'I expect you to.'

Okay, okay.
What time should I be there?

'They plan to transfer Dr. Akers
to a safe house'

'promptly at 10:00 a.m.'

And where do we meet afterwards?

'The hotel elevator will do.'

'Just make sure
you get everything, Bryce.'

'No matter what it takes
to do so.'

Look, just make sure you keep
your end of the deal, okay?

Uh, Mr. Hawthorn's office.

Is-is he there, please?
This is Diana Prince.

- Hey, Di, what you say?
- Who is this?

T. Burton Phipps III.
Golden Delicious, remember?

Yeah. Where's Carol?

She stepped out
to borrow some bread.

I think she wants to score
a Danish

but she doesn't quite have
enough money.

Yeah, I'll bet. Is Dale there?

Do you think I'd be here
if the Big D were here?

Man, if he knew I was here
talkin' on an IADC telephone..

...he'd probably kick my rear
clear into next Tuesday.

'Carol, any word on that
technician from D.C. yet?'

Um, unless I put you on hold

this week's gonna go by
awful fast.

Bye, Di.

No, don't, don't!
I'm at a phone booth.

Having to tell you something
33 times

does not make you a fast
learner, does it, Mr. Phipps?

Look, my business
consists of bringing

the supply to the demand.

Out.

You're hampering the growth
of free enterprise

without which
you would not even be here.

- Out.
- No.

I-I'm seriously
thinkin' of filing

a restraint of trade complaint
against you.

You do that.

You have a call on line three.

- Hello?
- 'Mr. Hawthorn? This is Diana.'

Listen, I'm gonna be
a little late this morning.

The people that are putting my
phone in are coming any minute.

'Yeah, listen to this.'

The lab boys
just finished analyzing

some of those particles
found in that chimp's fur.

They think the animal's
being held in a wooded area

before it escaped
and made its way into the city.

Possibly, uh,
Malibu or Topanga Canyon.

Oh, so you think
that's where Reichman is?

It's a good possibility.

- 'Please signal when through.'
- Thank you, operator.

Thank you, Mr. Hawthorn.

Thank you, T. Burton Phipps,
wherever you are.

I have to relieve you
of that briefcase, Dr. Akers.

Just hold it right there.

Give me the briefcase, doctor.

You fool.

Don't you know that
that madman has damned you?

Oh, God!
You scared me to death.

I didn't see any truck outside.

Listen, I want one phone in here

and then one
in the bedroom, okay?

I'm really in a hurry.

I'm not here to put in a phone,
Diana.

But, uh, if you're
expecting company

'that does change my plans.'

Who are you?

Friend of an enemy.

Let's go outside.

'Well, Bryce,
you obviously had no problems.'

'When?'

I have a certain amount
of research to do

before I can effect
a reversal treatment.

When, Reichman?

I have to review these notes,
set up a new lab

and do preliminary tests
on lower life forms.

In other words,
you'll be in touch?

Yes. I would say
that about sums it up.

Listen, Reichman

I'm gonna be just two steps
behind you

until you reverse
what you did to me.

Well, I should certainly
hope so.

I expect you to be right there

seeing that nothing happens
to me, because if it does..

Well..

Well, I guess this means
Reichman knows

we've got a fix on where he is.

My sources say differently.

Well, your sources
must've gotten up

pretty late this morning.

I just found out myself,
your boss, Mr. Reichman

is holed up at a place
in Malibu Canyon.

Close, but no cigar.

'The Rindge House on Harvard
in Topanga Canyon.'

You see how cleverly I got you
to tell me that?

The only person
you'll be repeating it to

is St. Peter.

'Should've stayed
in Washington, Diana.'

Life out here
is just one gigantic fast lane.

But then, some of
the most important lessons

we learn are the last.

Diana?

Turnabout's fair play.

Diana!

Diana, are you here?

Come on, wake up.
Come on, wake up, Diana.

Wake up, Diana. Come on.

Remind me to get the name
of your interior decorator

before I leave.

Why, you try having
just three days to move

from Washington, D.C.
to Los Angeles.

Besides, I'm kind of getting
to like it this way.

You must've loved
the Alaskan earthquake.

I feel like
the Alaskan earthquake.

Who did this to you?

Reichman. One of his goons.

- Oh, no.
- What?

I think I've done something
really stupid, Diana.

What?

I stole Akers' notes
and delivered them to Reichman.

I didn't want to believe
he was the maniac

Wonder Woman was tryin'
to tell me he was.

Well, now he has the notes
to your chemical process.

It's only a matter of time
before he creates hundreds

just like you.

He's probably long gone, too.

'Well, maybe not.'

He would at least wait around
until he got a report

from the man
who was supposed to kill me.

So he might have a head start
but not much of one.

You know where Reichman is?

Uh, yes, Topanga Canyon.

- Do you know where that is?
- Yes.

Let's go. Whoa!

You don't have Diana Prince
to kick around anymore.

What method did you use
to take her out?

Southern California style,
a victim of air pollution.

Well, Mr. Dupris,
it will not be long now

before the whole world learns

what became perfectly clear
to me in the Medical Corps

that man is the ultimate weapon.

My superiors were too busy
perfecting ways

to destroy mankind to listen
to me, but now they'll listen

because what good will guns
and missiles and warheads do

against an army of men
who cannot die?

This has got to be it.

- What're you doing?
- Looking for the wings.

- I wasn't driving that fast.
- Oh, yes, you were.

This place looks
like a fortress.

Listen, you start toward
the house.

I'm gonna see
if I can round up some help.

Out here?

Dupris, quick!

There's someone on the grounds.
James, alert the guards.

Bring the car around.
Keep the engine running.

Wonder Woman!

Diana really did get help.

Reichman has gotta be
somewhere inside.

And I'll just bet you
that he can help.

Cover me.

Alright. Where's Reichman?

I want you to stay
exactly where you are.

No. No!

Hey, listen,
I think we better split up.

I'm gonna go around back
and, uh, you take the high road.

- Leg up?
- Okay.

Two steps behind, Reichman.
I warned you.

Attack. Get him.

'Something's wrong.
He-he's not even scratched.'

'It's the formula.
He's invulnerable.'

Stay.

Now, I want you
to wait down there

and we'll talk about it later.

People will die all around you

friends, lovers, children.

And when this world ends

you'll go on and on, alone.

With all that data
in the briefcase

I'm sure someone
can figure out a cure.

Sounds about right to me.

No. It shall be my secret.

And someday, I will return

with hundreds of men like you,
with or without this!

Bryce! Bryce!

That smoke is poison!

We gotta get out of here!
Come on!

Bryce! Bryce! You alright?

All of his notes were destroyed.

I went to the track
yesterday to run.

Yes.

- I ran six four-minute miles.
- Whoa!

The only reason I stopped
'cause people were staring.

Well, I hope no one was there
from the Olympic Committee.

I can run forever, swim forever,
stay awake forever.

Everything there is to do,
I can do forever.

Do you know what the worst time
of all is?

It's the night.

Late, like,
like 3:00 in the morning.

Looking out over the city
with all the lights out..

...the freeways empty.

Nobody around, just me, alone

and knowing it's going to be
like that for a long, long time.

No, Bryce. It is not going to be
like that for a long, long time

because there're two things
that you're gonna do.

First of all, you're gonna stop
feeling sorry for yourself.

And then,
you're going to find Reichman

and make him reverse
what he did to you.

I'm gonna find Reichman?

He could be anywhere
in the world.

And I'm gonna find
Reichman by myself?

You're not exactly
all by yourself, are you?

Hadn't you noticed?

Yeah, I've noticed.

You're not exactly
chopped liver, are you?

And neither is Wonder Woman.

You know, Bryce

in a lot of ways Wonder Woman
is more alone than you are.

Between us, I think that
we'll be able to track down

Reichman sooner or later.

Meanwhile,
you can't exactly go back

to teaching college, can you?

Do you have any plans?

I don't know.
I don't know what I'm gonna do.

Well, you can always
join the circus

and, uh, bill yourself
as the Man of Steel.

Oh, great. I'd look great
in tights and a cape, huh?

Well, you wouldn't look so bad.

Listen, I have an idea.

How would you like to work
at the IADC?

Would that mean
working with you?

Yes.

I'd hate it.

I just talked to the police.
They're writing off Reichman.

He vanished without a trace.

Oh, great,
and without his notes!

If he's still determined
to create an army

of invulnerable men

at least he'll have to start
from scratch.

Yep. And Candle vanished also.

Maybe he's just keeping a
low profile someplace, you know.

If you were invulnerable, would
you want the world to know?

Look, I, uh, I know Wonder Woman
had a lot to do with this case.

I'm not one who likes to say
thank you very much, but..

...thank you
and welcome aboard.

Thank you, Mr. Hawthorn.

Ah. Whoa, wh-what is this monkey
doing here?

Well, with Reichman
still on the loose

Dr. Akers didn't really
feel comfortable

with keeping Tobias
around himself, so..

- Uh, you're his new mommy?
- No.

I found him a new papa.

Oh, no, not me.

I wouldn't do it to you,
Mr. Hawthorn.

- 'Diana?'
- Come in.

This is the new computer
technician

that you had requested
from Washington.

Also, Toby's new father.

As it turns out, he and I have
worked together before. Right?

Dale Hawthorn, Bret Cassidy.

- Hi.
- 'Nice to meet you.'

Diana showed me
your credentials yesterday.

- They're quite impressive.
- Thank you, sir.

I'll tell you what,
for your first assignment

get this monkey out of here.

- Okay. Okay.
- Go to your papa.

Okay.

Oh, uh, Diana,
can I borrow 75 cents?

Well, sure. What for?

I need to buy a paper.

Seventy-five cents
for a newspaper?

Doesn't he ever go to school?

♪ Wonder Woman ♪

♪ Wonder Woman ♪

♪ Wonder Woman ♪♪