Wellington Paranormal (2018–…): Season 1, Episode 1 - Demon Girl - full transcript

Minogue and O'Leary bring in what they think is another projectile-vomiting drunk teenager. But Sergeant Maaka realises she's a demon who's been visiting Wellington every 66 years. He invites Minogue and O'Leary to join his new Paranormal Unit and when the girl escapes from the station, our intrepid duo get their first assignment chasing the body-hopping demon across the suburbs, culminating in the gates of hell itself being opened in Wellington's bucket fountain.

We'll actually go
and look over here.

There's a young girl over here.

She might have been left behind by
her friends, be feeling a bit lost.

She might need some
sort of assistance.

Should go and see if she's OK.

Hello, love.

Hi, there.

She's very quiet. Um...

Oh. Are you all right?

I guess that's a no.

I mean, yeah, this is very unusual.

I mean, that's a lot to come
out of quite a small person.

I think she's clearly quite unwell.

I mean, we wanna know what's
happened to her tonight,

and what's made her vomit like this.

Let it out. Get it...

Over that way is better.
Get it all out.

I'm gonna request for assistance.

Minogue, requesting assistance
over here.

'Copy, O'Leary,
what's your location?'

I'm right behind you.

'Travelling.'

Yeah, we've gotta get this
girl to her caregivers.

She's Look, she's really unwell.

What's your name, love?

Bazual of the Unholy Realm.

We've got B. I've got B-A...
Bazual...

of the Unholy Realm.
OK.

As members of the New Zealand
Police Force,

it's our job to offer support
to those in need,

uh, and that takes the support
and the respect of the community.

Absolutely. It really does.

Is that the Unholy Realm
in Haitaitai?

Officer down.
I've got an officer down.

Officer back up!

See, look, he's back up.
That was a bit uncalled for.

Comms, we're bringing in a juvenile
female for drunk and disorderly,

and, uh, charging her with
throwing a police officer. Over.

Do you know how to turn
the air-con off at the back?

The air-con is off.
Really?

Big night, Saturday night.

A lot of people out drinking,

but you guys are out there doing
some exemplary police work.

Sevali and Jones
apprehended a vandal

caught in the act of
defacing public property.

The man was drawing a
large penis on a wall.

They managed to confiscate the pen,

and change the drawing into that
of a man with a big nose.

Actually, looking at it now,
it, uh...

it's not really gender-specific,
is it?

They showed initiative,
so, uh, well done.

Uh, what else?

Five of the seven pairs of trousers

that went missing from Blackfield
Menswear on Lambton Quay

were retrieved.
Well done, Stevenson and Parker.

Ah, hold on.

Parker.

Those aren't uniform pants,
are they?

Oh, um, there must have
been a mix-up, sir.

Is that right?
Is that right, Parker?

Those are Blackfield Menswear pants,
Parker.

They're not standard police issue,
are they?

And where is Stevenson today,
Parker?

At home on TradeMe.
Why?

Selling pants.

Right, might have to have
a little discussion about this

later in my office, yeah?

I'll do a report.
Good.

Let's get back out there, guys,
and remember to be safe, OK?

Dismissed.

Uh, Minogue, O'Leary.

I want to talk to you
guys about your report.

Now, what I'm about to
show you is top secret.

Don't look.

I have security access.
A special pin number.

Five.
Hey, don't Shh.

Hey, Sarge, you should probably have
some more digits in your pin.

What, like pin numbers?

Well, like, anyone has a
one-in-10 chance of guessing that.

Oh, yeah, of course.
There's more numbers involved.

Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep.

What is it?

What you're about to see behind
this door is classified.

Welcome to the
Wellington Police Paranormal Unit.

You are the only two officers to
have set foot in this division.

Because of its classified nature?

No, I've invited other officers in
here. No one wanted to come in here.

This is where I file
anything unusual

Anything, uh, out of the ordinary
that defies worldly explanation.

Do you believe in ghosts?
Not really.

My brother drew that when he was 10.
He saw it in our bathroom.

I believe this is a UFO.

Um, I believe that's a hubcap.

Interested in what
you think, Minogue.

Yeah, I believe it's a hubcap.

Yeah, well, I don't care
what you guys think.

This is the file that
pertains to your case.

This is a report from 1951.

'The felon spewed gallons
of sulphuric vomit,

smelling like eggs or Rotorua.'

This is from 1885.

'The lady spoke with a voice
bystanders described

as that of a coarse gentleman.

'She expelled fervent and copious
bile. It's odour that of sulphur.

Well, that's exactly
what happened tonight.

Now, the name the assailant
gave in each case

was Bazual of the Unholy Realm.

Are you joking with us?
I don't I don't joke at work.

Outside of work, I have a...

observational, absurdist
sense of humour

sometimes even a little bit risque.
Sorry about that.

Look, I don't give a shit.

Are you trying to say that
these cases are linked?

In each of the previous cases,

the person claiming to be Bazual

performed a human sacrifice
at dawn.

I'm just thinking
maybe we'd be better off

doing something
similar to the pants,

looking for the pants.

We could be out there on the streets,
you know, during the daytime.

I'm actually rostered on.

It's my turn to get attacked
by the police dog.

Get down to that interrogation room,

and check out this Bazual character
right now.

Yep, OK.

I'm gonna stay here,
and, uh, change the pin number.

Yes, sir.
Dismissed.

Yeah, so, we've just been reassigned
to the Wellington Paranormal Unit.

Um, it's highly classified unit.
Mm.

Um, so, yeah.

It's top secret.
No one else knows about it.

Sevali and Jones,
they haven't been briefed on it yet.

I mean, to put it in layman's terms,

we're kind of like
Mulder and Scully.

She's like Scully because she's
analytical, she's got the brains.

And, uh, I'm a man with brown hair.

Yeah, so, I'm not sure if
paranormal phenomena exists.

It's pronounced phre-mo-mema.
It's phenomena.

Well, it's phre-mo-mema.

It's phenomena the N.
Phenomena.

Another way that we're like Mulder
and Scully is that we've got,

sort of, an underlying
sexual tension going on.

She doesn't look well.

The dead shall
rise from hell.

Do you need a lozenge, or something?

Maybe we could call a.

Do you want us to call your parents
or a guardian, perhaps?

There will be buckets of
blood and a fountain of fire.

'She's scaring me,
O'Leary.

'Can you do your bad cop?'
'Mm. Oh yeah.'

Stop that. It's a bit scary.

Yeah.

Hello. My name is Sgt Maaka.

I'd like to have a few words
with you, if I may.

Can I call my parents?

Uh, she's just got a normal voice.

Youse I thought you said she had
some sort of demonic man's voice.

Yeah, well, she did before.

Can I go home now?

She just sounds like
a normal teenage girl.

This is not a case for
the Paranormal Unit at all.

I had a whole speech planned and
everything. What am I gonna do now?

Um, look,
I'm very sorry about this.

I tell you what we'll contact yo
parents. They'll come and get you.

Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa!

Let's go!

It's unholy.

Should we jump after her?

That was pretty insane. I mean, have
you seen the likes of that before?

Have I seen that before?
No.

Have I seen a teenage girl
leap through a window,

have light going all over her face
and her blowing back in the wind.

No. No, I haven't.

And I tell you what it is.

It's pretty obvious to me. She
Drugs.

Oh, I thought robot.

'B-4, this is Comms. Over.'
Go ahead.

'Domestic dispute at 9 Greys Ave.
Need you to respond. Over.'

Yeah, that's a negative, Comms.

We're on a special mission. Over.

'Yeah, the caller has requested

Minogue and O'Leary specifically.
Over.'

On our way. Over.

Do we get to turn our
lights on for that?

Yeah, definitely.

I might go a bit faster,
if that's all right.

Well, we need to. We've gotta
get there. Comms just said. Right-o.

So, we're on the way to
a domestic incident.

Hopefully it's just an argument,

something that can be resolved
quickly,

cos we've got, obviously,
other things to do.

Potentially bigger fish to fry.

Good evening.
Hi.

Hi. Officers O'Leary and Minogue.

Is there any trouble?
I've locked him in the garage.

OK, we should probably come in and
have a look around... Yeah, come in.

...if that's OK.
He's just watching the rugby,

and he starts yelling and carrying
on like he's possessed.

It's just the worse midlife
crisis you've ever seen.

Minogue.
'Oh, matching shirts.

'That's awesome. We could do that.'

We do that every day.

It's not that.
Look, it's the same girl.

She looks a million times better
in the photo, eh, than in person.

Don't say that in front of the mum.
At one time, he was very normal.

What is normal?
Well, this isn't.

Oh gosh! OK, that's
more than a midlife crisis.

Gary, can you get down off
the roof? The cops are here.

He's breaking the law of gravity,
O'Leary.

How did you get up there, sir?

Minogue and O'Leary,
we meet again.

I don't think so, mate.

Do you know him, O'Leary?
Do you play softball?

I am Bazual.

Bull. His name's Gary.

I am Bazual
of the Unholy Realm.

Look, just try and
calm yourself, mate.

You should probably come
down from there, mate.

He got really angry when
our daughter came home late,

and she was in a really bad mood.

I mean, I don't know. Could have
been too much screen-time.

Do you want some help?

Oh, no, look, your neck
is gonna get really sore,

and I'm not massaging it tonight.

Have you seen that before?
God, no.

You need to stop that, and you really
need to listen to your wife, Gary.

You're 47!
47?

Are you all right?
Are you feeling a bit better?

What am I doing on the fridge?

Yeah, so, the gentleman calmed down.

So, we've just let him off with
a warning.

Mm. Turns out he was
a different Bazual.

Our original person of
interest was his daughter.

Turns out that she seems to
have calmed down now, as well.

So bit of a win-win.

I mean, so we can go now,
knowing that everyone here is safe.

Well, so the father and daughter
both called themselves.

Bazual of the Unholy Realm.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, he's named after her.

And then they both
had super strength.

Weird. And talked about fountains
of fire. I think it runs in the family.

Speaking of running in the family...

We're going 50.

She's gone into those bushes.

Pursuing on foot.
She's slowing down, O'Leary.

In pursuit. I'll follow her.
Head her off! Head her off!

Ma'am!

Running from the police
is an offence. Stop!

I'm gonna have to scale the fence.

That's all right.
Let's get this up here.

Just... Oh.

Just Once you get your feet in...

Ma'am! Ma'am!

You shouldn't be running
in a playground, ma'am!

I've got some questions Oh!

Ma'am, you shouldn't be running in
a playground in those Ugg boots.

'So, I've been in pursuit of
a highly acrobatic housewife.'

Ma'am?

'Just come through the children's
playground, through the back here,

and she's absolutely vanished.
No idea where she could've gone.

I'm in two minds about whether I
really wanna find her, to be honest.

Hello?

Minogue?

Who said that?

Oh, gidday, boy.

Hello.

Hello, Minogue.

Your mother sucks in hell,
Minogue.

You're a bad dog.

The mouth will open.

The dead will walk the earth.
Stop talking, you freaky little dog.

I am Bazual! I do as I please!

There will be buckets of
blood.

A fountain of fire!

Did you guys see that?

That dog was talking, right?

Well, obviously, you do get
hurdles in policing,

and these sorts of fences
certainly are one of them.

You know, it's a real challenge.

I think, certainly, since they've
changed the way they make these fences,

it's been a lot harder
to get over them cleanly.

It's not something that
normally happens to me.

To be honest, if anything,

Minogue, perhaps, is a little bit
more prone to this kind of thing.

But, like I said,
I was just giving it my best shot

and it didn't quite work out
on the day.

Yeah.

Minogue, I'm just requesting
assistance here.

Caught on a fence again, O'Leary?

Uh, yep.

On my way.

I think I need a hug.

So, a dog spoke to you?

Yes, and it was very rude.

Are you sure it wasn't like one
of those internet dogs that sounds

like its talking when
it's actually just barking.

Like a 'Oh, harrow!'
No.

Harrow. How rar roo rooray?

I'm not an idiot.

Maybe somebody was behind the dog
while it was chewing quietly.

No. It was saying that my mother
does sexual stuff in hell.

These guys recorded all of it.

Um, do you mind if we
get that footage?

What, of his mum?
No, of the dog.

He said his name was Bazual.

I've been doing some extensive
research on this Bazual.

I googled it.

Turns out Bazual means
'He who brings hell on Earth.'

Bazual itself is not that great,
but I mean, with that definition

it's not gonna top any
baby names lists, is it?

I'm surprised
it's so popular already.

It's not that the girl or the father
or the dog have the same name.

It's the same entity.

OK, it transfers from body to body,
using them as vessels.

So, the two of you picked
up the young woman here,

and then brought her
to the station which is here.

She escaped and ran
to this address here.

It transferred to the father
and then to the wife,

who ran to here.

Changed course to here,

and then turned around and then
came back to this point here,

where Minogue had
the conversation with the dog.

So it's like one those stars
you used to draw in primary school.

Oh, yeah.
Remember those?

All those other lines confused it.
Well, you mean the map lines? Mm. Mm.

Sorry, Sarge. Yep.

What it is is a pentagram.
It's a symbol of the devil.

It's centred right
here at Cuba Mall.

In the mid '60s,

a group of Satanists based
in the Wellington CBD

erected a shrine to hell itself.

That dog kept on saying, 'Buckets
of blood. A fountain of fire.'

We're not talking about the dog
right now. We're talking about this.

One of Wellington's
most iconic monuments.

That's the Cuba St Bucket Fountain.

These 13 buckets represent
the 13 chambers of hell.

The fountain itself
is a hell mouth

a gateway to and from
the underworld.

'The mouth shall open,
where dead shall walk the earth.'

Metallica?

Nah, no, it's that dog.

That dog was saying it.
Could that be relevant?

Bazual intends to make
a human sacrifice.

If he succeeds, the dead will claw
their way up from hell

through this bucket fountain

and walk the streets
of the Wellington CBD.

Sarge, I think the bucket
just tipped blood.

It's begun.

What's happening, guys?

We're tryna stop the dead from
walking through Cuba St, Parker.

Parker, your pants!

O'Leary reckons there's gonna be
blood coming out of the fountain.

Hey, look, it's gonna tip...

now.

Now.

Now.
No.

Now.
No.

Now.
No.

Now.
Dammit.

Now. Now. Nope.

No, that's horrible.
It is blood.

It's a sign of the apocalypse.
That's blood.

Minogue, is that the dog you saw?

Minogue.

It's got the same voice.

Right, let's get it.
No, he called for me.

Dog's talking.
You're a bad dog!

Dog's talking!

You're a naughty little
dirty-mouth dog.

You stay!

Stay!

I got it, guys.

It's all good, guys.

Tell us what you want, demon.
Tell us right now!

Answer him. The dead
shall walk the earth.

It transferred to that guy!
Requesting assistance.

Clearance to Taser? No,
no, I'll tase him. I'll tase him.

No, we must perform an exorcism.

Do you? Do you know how to do that.

An exorcism.

So, what you all need
is a crucifix...

Yep, check... a
Holy Bible... Got it.

...and some duct tape.
Duct tape.

- Oh, guys.
- Pretty urgent now, I think.

You are going to hell, Minogue!
Aw...

'Tell them the power of
Christ compels you.' OK.

The power of Christ compels you!

What next, Sarge?

I-I don't know. It's buffering.
Sorry, guys. I'm on prepay.

It sounds like someone burning.
It's burning.

Call the fire service!

You are the sacrifice
to the Dark Lord!

Why me?

Well, maybe, I mean, they always
sacrifice virgins, mate.

So, are you a virgin?
No!

Sorry, I don't know his sexual
I don't know your sexual history.

I've actually never seen
any of his girlfriends.

He might actually be a virgin.

O'Leary.

'Make sure you
say this three times.'

OK, say it two more times.

The power of Christ compels you.

That's two.
With more authority.

The power of Christ compels you!

It's working. It's worked. Police!

We're gonna get you!
Wait, wait, wait, wait.

No, no, no, no. Get off him.
Get off him.

That is not Bazual.
We banished him to hell, remember?

Oh, that's right.

Yeah, so, we're not entirely sure
what happened out here tonight

whether it was some
sort of mass hysteria

It could have been, you know, some
illegal drugs in the water supply. Mm-hm.

Or it was paranormal phreno-mema.
Maybe.

Certainly, if you suspect
that your friend or colleague

or anyone that you know

has been taken over by
a demon from hell,

that's the kind of thing you really
wanna, you know, call in quickly.

Any time there's gates to hell..

Never a good sign.
Give us a call.

What this incident highlighted

is the need for a special unit
of the New Zealand Police Force

that deals with the cases
which have no worldly explanation.

I was wondering where
you got to, Parker.

You're in luck, mate. In about
six minutes, I'm off the clock,

and I have a legendary
joke for you all.

Well, I haven't actually
told it yet.

Captions SBS Australia 2018