Wayside (2005–2008): Season 1, Episode 27 - Dana Checks Out - full transcript
* So cool and crazy and wild
and upside-down *
* I'm bored
and that's not fun *
* I want to get away
* But I'm too tired to run
* I'm gonna find a place
where there are no rules *
* And the world is wild
* I have the tools
to make things happen *
* And the reaction
will explode *
* The lights go up
* The world flips
upside down *
* I brought the party
to town *
* My deal to make
My chance to take *
* So take a ride
* Fly by the Wayside
* And fly by the Wayside
* The lights go up
* The world flips
upside down *
* I brought the party
to town *
* My deal to make
My chance to take *
* So take a ride
* So take a ride
* Fly by the Wayside,
Wayside! *
* Fly by the Wayside,
Wayside! *
* Wayside!
A, B, C, D...
F!
(CLOCK TICKS,
SCHOOL BELL RINGS)
TODD:
HEY, DANA.
EVERYTHING ALL RIGHT?
YEAH,
JUST A LITTLE TIRED.
EVERY DAY
I GET HERE AT DAWN
TO ORGANIZE THE CLASS,
LIST ALL THE RULES,
PUT THE BOXES
INSIDE THE BOXES...
HEY, DANA,
HAVE YOU SEEN MY BOX?
YEAH,
IT'S INSIDE THE BOX.
OH GOODY!
(LOUD CRASH
AND OBJECTS CLATTER)
THANKS!
JENNY!
HAVE YOU ACTUALLY TRAVELLED
TO ALL THOSE PLACES
ON YOUR BIKE?
YEP.
I'VE BEEN EVERYWHERE,
MAN.
I'VE BEEN TO EVERY FLOOR
OF WAYSIDE,
EXCEPT THE 19TH.
BUT THEY SAY
THE 19TH FLOOR
DOESN'T EVEN EXIST!
UH HUH.
THE ONLY ONE I'VE MISSED.
OOH! I WISH I HAD
YOUR SENSE OF ADVENTURE
AND FREEDOM.
I'M LIKE A BOX
INSIDE A BOX,
INSIDE A BOX!
I SPEND ALL DAY
ORGANIZING STUFF.
NOT LIKE YOU!
YOU'RE SO WELL-ROUNDED!
YOUR HELMET'S ROUND,
YOUR WHEELS ARE ROUND,
YOU GO A-ROUND THE WORLD!
I'VE NEVER EVEN SEEN
ALL OF WAYSIDE!
TIME TO BUST OUT
OF BOXVILLE?
WANNA BORROW MY RIDE?
REALLY?
I CAN TAKE YOUR BIKE?
BEST KIND OF FREEDOM
IS THE KIND
YOU SHARE.
RIDE LIKE THE WIND,
SISTA D.
ENOUGH WITH THE BOX!
I'M OUTTA HERE!
(TIRES SQUEAL
AND ENGINE RUMBLES)
UH-UH-UH,
DANA.
YOU NEED A HALL PASS
FOR ALL 30 FLOORS
TO RIDE LIKE THE WIND
AND TASTE THE SWEET FROTH
OF FREEDOM!
OKAY, CAN I GET A 30-FLOOR
HALL PASS?
SURE!
LAST TIME I CHECKED,
THEY WERE SOMEWHERE
INSIDE THOSE BOXES!
MYRON:
WEEEE!
UH OH.
TAKE MINE, SISTA D.
NOW GO!
AND DON'T LOOK BACK!
DANA:
WOW!
(TIRES SQUEAL,
REVS ENGINE)
(BIKE BELL DINGS
AND WHEELS SQUEAK)
WOW!
WHO KNEW IT WOULD BE
SO MUCH FUN
TO SEE THE WHOLE WORLD,
OR AT LEAST EVERY FLOOR
OF WAYSIDE.
OKAY, CLASS,
EVERYONE TAKE OUT A PENCIL-
MAURECIA:
MRS. JEWLS?
WHERE ARE OUR PENCILS?
WELL, UH, IN,
IN THE PENCIL THINGY.
OH, I DON'T KNOW.
DANA USUALLY HANDS THEM OUT.
STEPHEN:
DANA'S NOT HERE!
WHAT'LL WE DO?!
NOT TO WORRY.
AS YOUR SOMETIME-CLASS
PRESIDENT,
I CAN HANDLE THIS.
(WATER SPLASHES,
FISH FLAPS)
HERE.
THAT'S NOT A PENCIL,
IT'S A FISH!
(COIN CHIMES
AS IT'S FLICKED)
MISS MUSH:
OH! LOOK AT YOU!
WHERE YOU GO?
I'M OFF ON A WAYSIDE
ROAD TRIP!
INCLUDING THE 19TH FLOOR!
MISS MUSH:
HO HO!
19TH FLOOR, HUH?
I GOT JUST THE THING
FOR YOU!
HEY SAMMY!
A CHUNK OF SKUNK,
TWO CENTER LINE BOVINES!
GAG IT N' BAG IT!
HERE YOU GO,
A LITTLE SURPRISE,
TO TIDE YOU OVER!
HAS ANYONE SEEN
MY ASSIGNMENT?
NOT ME.
WHERE'S MY FLUFFY?!
I CAN'T READ
MY FISH'S HANDWRITING!
HMPH!
WAIT! COME BACK!
YOU NEED TO HELP ME
WITH MY MATHEMATICS!
OKAY, CLASS, TIME TO HAND IN
YOUR ASSIGNMENT TO DANA.
OH! UH, I MEAN TO,
TO UH...
DON'T WORRY,
I'VE GOT IT,
MRS. JEWLS!
THERE.
ANYTHING ELSE?
WHAT DO YOU WANT?
WH
(BIKE BELL DINGS
AND TIRE SQUEALS)
MAYBE IT'S TIME
WE FIND DANA.
NONSENSE.
I'VE GOT IT COMPLETELY
UNDER CONTROL.
JOE:
WHERE'S DANA?
MY HEAD IS STUCK!
I CAN'T SEE!
REALLY?
MAYBE WE JUST NEED
MORE LIGHT IN HERE!
CAREFUL, MYRON!
DANA'S THE ONLY ONE
WHO EVER TOUCHES
THOSE DRAPES!
PSHAW!
WHAT COULD GO WRONG?
(SECURITY ALARM
BUZZES LOUDLY)
(WIND GUSTS,
KIDS TEETH CHATTER)
DON'T WORRY.
I'LL JUST CLOSE
THE WINDOW.
(RAIN POURS
AND THUNDER RUMBLES)
IT'S OKAY.
A LITTLE RAIN
NEVER HURT ANYONE.
WOO!
NOW I KNOW WE'RE SAFE.
LIGHTNING NEVER STRIKES
THE SAME PLACE TWICE.
AHH, SEE?
RAIN'S ENDING.
LIGHTNING TOO.
EVERYTHING'LL BE JUST FINE.
AT LEAST THE WORST
IS OVER.
UH, MAYBE WE SHOULD
FIND DANA.
SHE'S NOT UNDER HERE!
AHHH...
I NEEDED THIS BREAK.
I'VE NEVER FELT SO FREE!
IT'S LIKE...
I'M ALMOST OUT
OF THAT BOX,
AND I CAN FINALLY
BREATHE AGAIN.
MYRON:
HELLO, DANA.
WHAT A COINCIDENCE!
WE WERE JUST TALKING
ABOUT YOU IN CLASS!
REALLY
WHAT WERE YOU SAYING?
TODD:
HELP!
HEEELP!
PLEASE, PLEASE
COME BACK
TO CLASS, DANA,
BEFORE THINGS
GET COMPLETELY
OUT OF CONTROL!
I'M LIKE A BOX
INSIDE A BOX,
INSIDE A BOX!
NO WAY!
THAT'S THE OLD
STUCK-IN-A-BOX DANA!
SEE? I TOLD YOU.
I'M NOT DONE
SEEING THE WORLD,
OR AT LEAST ALL 30 FLOORS
OF WAYSIDE.
I STILL HAVE
THE 19TH TO GO.
WOOO!
WELL, THAT'S THAT!
I'M JUST GOING
TO GO UPSTAIRS
AND FINISH ORGANIZING
MRS. JEWLS' CLASS.
ORGANIZE THE CLASS?!
WE GOTTA GET
DANA BACK.
AND I KNOW JUST THE SISTER
TO DO IT.
STEPHEN:
MY MATH!
MY MATHEMATICS!
NOW FOR THE LAST FLOOR -
THE NEVER-SEEN 19!
OKAY, OKAY.
I CAN DO THIS!
I'VE GOTTA FINISH
MY JOURNEY
AND BUST OUT OF MY BOX
FOR GOOD!
JENNY:
HOLD ON THERE, SISTA D.
THERE'S A GOOD REASON
I'VE NEVER SEEN
THE 19TH FLOOR, YOU KNOW.
LEGEND SAYS
THAT'S WHERE THE DOOR
TO MISS ZARVES' CLASS
WAS SUPPOSED TO GO.
MISS ZARVES?
UH HUH.
A FEW YEARS BACK,
THIS KID, NICK,
WANTED TO FIND OUT
WHAT'S UP THERE.
JENNY:
HE WAS A BIT
OF A DAREDEVIL TOO.
AIMED HIMSELF RIGHT
AT THAT DOOR AREA.
SO DID HE FIND
THE 19TH FLOOR?
NO,
OF COURSE NOT.
HE JUST BROKE
HIS ARM.
OH...
BUT THE WEIRD THING IS...
MISS ZARVES
SIGNED HIS CAST!
CREEPY!
LOOK, SISTER DEE!
WHOA!
MISS ZARVES!
WOO HOO!
WE DID IT!
JENNY AND DANA:
OH YEAH! 19TH FLOOR!
AND BACK AGAIN!
HIGH FIVE, SISTER!
RIGHT ON!
BOTH:
WHEW!
DANA?
YEAH, SISTA J?
CAN I HAVE MY BIKE
BACK NOW?
OH YEAH.
TODD:
DANA:
HEY GUYS!
I'VE JUST SEEN
ALL OF WAYSIDE!
THE WAYSIDE TOUR
IS COMPLETE!
TODD:
NOT QUITE, DANA.
THERE'S STILL
ONE MORE STOP
YOU GOTTA MAKE.
RIGHT, MYRON?
DANA, COULD YOU PLEASE
COME UP TO THE 30TH FLOOR
AND FIX THE HORRIBLE MESS
THAT IS ALL MY FAULT?
NO PROBLEMO,
BROTHER M.
SOUNDS LIKE A CRAZY
ADVENTURE!
STEPHEN:
WEEE! MATH!
THANK YOU, MR. BIRDIE!
MRS. JEWLS:
DANA, WE ARE SO GLAD
TO HAVE YOU BACK.
CLASS:
YAY!
WOO-HOO-HOO!
OKAY, BACK TO OUR LESSON.
WHAT'S 4,615,320
TIMES 6,493,121,
DIVIDED BY 4,036,
MINUS 923,000
PLUS 5,300?
MYRON:
MORE FASTER THAN
A SPEEDING BULLET,
MORE POWERFUL THAN
A HERD OF COWS.
ABLE TO LEAP
30-STOREY SCHOOLS
IN A SINGLE BOUND.
IT'S, IT'S, IT'S...
MR. KIDSWATTER!
POSSESSING
REMARKABLE INTELLECT
AND DISGUISED AS HUMBLE
PRINCIPAL OF WAYSIDE,
MR. KIDSWATTER FIGHTS
A NEVER-ENDING BATTLE
FOR EDUCATION
AND ETIQUETTE.
HE HAS A BIG DESK...
AND A MICROPHONE, TOO.
AND WHEN HE TALKS
EVERYONE LISTENS.
ATTENTION, STUDENTS!
ATTENTION!
ATTENTION, ATTENTION...
THIS IS YOUR PRINCIPAL
SPEAKING.
BLAH, BLAH-BLAH, BLAH,
BLAH, BLAH, BLAH-BLAH-BLAH,
BLAH, BLAH, BLAH!
BLAH, BLAH, BLAH,
BLAH-BLAH!
BLAH, BLAH-BLAH,
BLAH, BLAH,
BLAH-BLAH!
BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH.
THANK YOU.
MYRON:
HE IS SO POWERFUL
AND IMPORTANT.
I WANT TO BE POWERFUL
AND IMPORTANT TOO!
JUST LIKE HIM!
THAT'S WHY
HE'S MY HERO.
WHOOSH!
WHOOSH!
WHOOSH!
WHOOSH!
WHOOSH!
THANK YOU FOR THAT
INCREDIBLE REPORT
ON YOUR PERSONAL HERO,
MYRON.
BUT I'M NOT DONE!
I HAVE A SCRAPBOOK
FULL OF MR. K.
PHOTOS, MEMENTOS,
AND EVEN BOOTLEG RECORDINGS
OF HIS PA ANNOUNCEMENTS.
I REMIXED THEM.
ATTENTION-TENTION!
(WORDS ARE MIXED INTO
A BEAT
HIT ME.
(HIP-HOP AND BEAT-BOXING
CONTINUES)
RAISE THE ROOF, Y'ALL!
LET ME HEAR YOU
IN THE BACK ROW!
KIDSWATTER:
MORGAN?
MORGAN!
DID YOU HEAR THAT?
MORGAN!
MY HERO NEEDS ME!
STUPID GOOZACK!
OOF!
OH, HEY THERE, MILO!
IT'S MYRON.
KIDSWATTER:
WHO?
HOW DO I LOOK TODAY?
THERE'S ONLY ONE WORD
FOR THAT.
OW! FOXY!
YOU DA MAN,
MR. K!
KIDSWATTER:
THANKS, MIRROR.
IT'S MYRON.
KIDSWATTER:
NOT YOU, MARVIN.
I'M TALKING
TO THE MIRROR.
OH.
THANKS, MARCIA.
NOW TO GET DOWN
TO BUSINESS.
IT'S MYRON.
BUT YOU KNOW THAT,
MR. KIDSWATTER.
LOOKS LIKE YOU NEED
A NEW SCRAPBOOK.
ACTUALLY,
I NEED A NEW LOCKER.
I'M RUNNING OUT OF ROOM
TO STORE ALL MY MR. K
FAN MEMORABILIA!
I KNOW KIDSWATTER'S
YOUR HERO, MYRON,
BUT SOMETIMES...
DON'T YOU THINK
HE COULD APPRECIATE YOU
A LITTLE MORE?
TODD!
HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT?!
WELL, BECAUSE OF THE FACT
THAT HE DOESN'T EVEN
KNOW YOUR NAME.
HE DOESN'T?
MOJO!
MORTY!
MOLLY!
MORGAN!
MOOCH!
MELVIN!
MARIO!
MICKEY!
MOJO!
MINKY-MONKY-MO!
OH, THOSE ARE JUST
HIS PET NAMES FOR ME.
DANA:
ACCORDING TO MY RECORDS,
I'VE ALSO HEARD HIM
CALL YOU MUSTARD,
MOB, MUFFLER,
MARSHMALLOW...
AT LEAST HE GETS
THE "M" RIGHT.
MAURECIA:
MYRON,
HE HAS NO IDEA
WHO YOU ARE.
IF YOU DON'T BELIEVE ME,
LET'S ASK HIM.
(SNORING,
CLANKING ON DOOR)
MR. KIDSWATTER?
WE GOT A QUESTION.
AH! JUST WORKING!
LET ME GET THAT,
MR. KIDSWATTER.
THANKS A LOT, MUNCHY.
IT'S MYRON.
WHO?
MR. KIDSWATTER,
WE'RE TRYING
TO PROVE A POINT.
CAN YOU JUST TELL US
WHAT MYRON'S NAME IS?
SURE! IT'S... MMM...
THINK HARD.
HE'S YOUR BIGGEST FAN!
MMM...
HMM...
MMM...
C'MON, MR. K,
YOU KNOW THIS!
MMM...
MYRON!
MMM...
MM.
MMM...
OKAY, THAT'S ENOUGH.
HE GOT THE "M" RIGHT
AND THAT'S GOOD ENOUGH
FOR ME!
KIDSWATTER:
WAIT!
I KNOW!
IT'S MMM... LAWRENCE!
L-L-L-L-L...
LAWRENCE?
NOOOOOOOOO!
WHAT'S WITH THAT
MARTY KID?
I'VE BEEN
SUCH A FOOL.
SUCH A... A...
A LAWRENCE.
TODD:
MYRON,
WE DIDN'T MEAN
TO UPSET YOU.
WE JUST DIDN'T WANT
MR. KIDSWATTER
TO TAKE ADVANTAGE
OF YOU ANYMORE.
YEAH!
MAYBE YOU SHOULD JUST
GIVE UP ON KIDSWATTER
AND FIND A NEW HERO.
LIKE MY FAVORITE
SUPERSTAR,
ANNIE WHEELZ!
SHE'S THE ONLY KID
TO EVER COMPLETE
A QUADRUPLE, INSIDE-OUT,
REVERSE MOBIUS-TWIST!
ANNOUNCER:
THERE SHE GOES.
HER FINAL ATTEMPT.
ANNIE WHEELER
HAS NAILED IT AGAIN!
EVERY TIME I TRY...
WOO HOO!
OH, ANNIE.
I AM NOT WORTHY.
NAH!
I THINK I NEED SOMEONE
A LITTLE MORE EXCITING.
DANA:
WELL...
IF EXCITEMENT'S
YOUR GAME,
TRY MY HERO:
MELVILLE LOUIS KUSSOTH DEWEY,
FOUNDER OF THE DEWEY
DECIMAL SYSTEM,
THE SINGLE MOST
EFFECTIVE FORM
OF ORGANIZATION
IN THE WORLD!
(SOUND OF AIR FLOWING
THROUGH A HOLLOW TUBE)
DANA,
I THINK YOUR DEWEY
DID HIM IN.
BUT WAIT 'TIL
HE SEES MY HERO.
LIEUTENANT LOGIC!
HE THINKS
EVERYTHING THROUGH
TO IT'S MOST LOGICAL
CONCLUSION.
AND THEN,
HE SAVES THE DAY!
UM, IF THAT'S THE PRACTICAL
THING TO DO,
OF COURSE.
WHY ISN'T HE
IN COLOUR?
BECAUSE HE ONLY SEES
IN BLACK AND WHITE.
LIEUTENANT LOGIC:
YOU CAN RUN,
BUT YOU CAN'T HIDE
FROM THE LOGIC HAMMER!
THAT DOESN'T
MAKE ANY SENSE!
WHO CARES ABOUT LOGIC
ANYWAY?!
I'M OFF TO FIND
A NEW HERO!
MYRON:
OKAY, SHOW ME WHAT YA GOT.
'SCUSE ME?
MYRON:
I SAID, "SHOW ME WHAT YA GOT!"
SOUNDS A BIT CONFUSED.
CAN YOU TRY IT AGAIN,
THIS TIME,
MORE... HEROIC!
UM... OKAY.
BUT WHY?
MYRON:
DIDN'T YOU READ
THE SIGN-UP SHEET
WHEN YOU WALKED
INTO THE AUDITION?
I'M LOOKING
FOR A NEW HERO.
SOMEONE POWERFUL,
IMPORTANT,
AND INSPIRING.
I JUST CAME HERE
TO CHANGE A LIGHTBULB.
MYRON:
NEXT!!
HERE YOU GO, BABOOTSKI.
NICE BIG HERO SANDWICH.
OOH!
THAT'S NOT
THE KIND OF HERO
I WAS THINKING OF,
BUT WHY NOT?
MMM! SAY, THIS IS GOOD.
WHAT'S IN IT ANYWAY?
IT MOSTLY WET SAND,
WITH A LITTLE BIT
OF MAYONNAISE.
MYRON:
MAYONNAISE?!
YUCK!
NEXT!
HMM...
PUT HER DOWN
FOR A CALLBACK.
WE'LL BE IN TOUCH!
HEY, FOX-
MY COMPLEXION!
HMM...
STRANGE.
WHERE'S MY COFFEE?
MAYBE I'LL HAVE A DOUGHNUT.
SOMETHING IS DEFINITELY
MISSING AROUND HERE.
BUT WHAT?
MYRON:
NEXT!
NEXT!
WOOOO!
MYRON:
NEXT!
MYRON:
NEXT!
NEXT!
UGH!
A HERO SHOULD INSPIRE ME,
AND SOMEHOW MAKE MY LIFE
BETTER EVERY DAY.
I'LL NEVER FIND ANYONE HERE
LIKE THAT.
KIDSWATTER:
HELP!
HAS ANYONE SEEN MY HERO?
MR. KIDSWATTER?!
YOU'RE LOOKING FOR WHO?
MY PERSONAL HERO.
I CAN'T FIND HIM ANYWHERE!
WHAT AN AMAZING FELLA!
SOMEHOW MADE MY LIFE
EVEN BETTER EVERY DAY,
AND MADE GREAT DOUGHNUTS.
WOW!
WHAT'S THE NAME
OF THIS MOST INCREDIBLE
HERO PERSON?
I BELIEVE IT'S LAWRENCE.
KNOW HIM?
NO. CAN'T SAY I DO,
BUT HE SOUNDS LIKE
HERO MATERIAL TO ME.
WHATEVER.
I'LL JUST HAVE TO KEEP
LOOKING FOR HIM.
HERO?
HERO!
WHERE ARE YOU?
DANA, WE NEED TO FIND
THIS LAWRENCE KID.
I CAN MAKE HIM
MY HERO TOO!
MYRON, DON'T YOU GET IT?
DANA, TODD AND MAURECIA:
YOU'RE LAWRENCE!
REMEMBER MR. KIDSWATTER
CALLED YOU THAT
WHEN HE TRIED TO THINK
OF YOUR NAME?
HMM....
LAWRENCE!
YOU MEAN, I'M ACTUALLY
MR. K'S HERO?
AND MY OWN HERO TOO?
AND YOUR OWN
BIGGEST FAN!
KIDSWATTER:
HERO! WHERE ARE YOU?
HOLD ON, MR. KIDSWATTER!
I'LL HELP!
WHERE'S THE GOOZACK!
OH, THERE YOU ARE,
LAWRENCE.
SO GLAD YOU COULD HELP.
THAT'S WHAT
A GREAT HERO DOES.
ESPECIALLY IF THAT HERO
IS ALSO HIS OWN BIGGEST FAN!
WHATEVER!
C'MON LESTER,
LET'S GET SOME DOUGHNUTS.
IT'S LAWRENCE!
KIDSWATTER:
IF YOU SAY SO, LORRAINE.
and upside-down *
* I'm bored
and that's not fun *
* I want to get away
* But I'm too tired to run
* I'm gonna find a place
where there are no rules *
* And the world is wild
* I have the tools
to make things happen *
* And the reaction
will explode *
* The lights go up
* The world flips
upside down *
* I brought the party
to town *
* My deal to make
My chance to take *
* So take a ride
* Fly by the Wayside
* And fly by the Wayside
* The lights go up
* The world flips
upside down *
* I brought the party
to town *
* My deal to make
My chance to take *
* So take a ride
* So take a ride
* Fly by the Wayside,
Wayside! *
* Fly by the Wayside,
Wayside! *
* Wayside!
A, B, C, D...
F!
(CLOCK TICKS,
SCHOOL BELL RINGS)
TODD:
HEY, DANA.
EVERYTHING ALL RIGHT?
YEAH,
JUST A LITTLE TIRED.
EVERY DAY
I GET HERE AT DAWN
TO ORGANIZE THE CLASS,
LIST ALL THE RULES,
PUT THE BOXES
INSIDE THE BOXES...
HEY, DANA,
HAVE YOU SEEN MY BOX?
YEAH,
IT'S INSIDE THE BOX.
OH GOODY!
(LOUD CRASH
AND OBJECTS CLATTER)
THANKS!
JENNY!
HAVE YOU ACTUALLY TRAVELLED
TO ALL THOSE PLACES
ON YOUR BIKE?
YEP.
I'VE BEEN EVERYWHERE,
MAN.
I'VE BEEN TO EVERY FLOOR
OF WAYSIDE,
EXCEPT THE 19TH.
BUT THEY SAY
THE 19TH FLOOR
DOESN'T EVEN EXIST!
UH HUH.
THE ONLY ONE I'VE MISSED.
OOH! I WISH I HAD
YOUR SENSE OF ADVENTURE
AND FREEDOM.
I'M LIKE A BOX
INSIDE A BOX,
INSIDE A BOX!
I SPEND ALL DAY
ORGANIZING STUFF.
NOT LIKE YOU!
YOU'RE SO WELL-ROUNDED!
YOUR HELMET'S ROUND,
YOUR WHEELS ARE ROUND,
YOU GO A-ROUND THE WORLD!
I'VE NEVER EVEN SEEN
ALL OF WAYSIDE!
TIME TO BUST OUT
OF BOXVILLE?
WANNA BORROW MY RIDE?
REALLY?
I CAN TAKE YOUR BIKE?
BEST KIND OF FREEDOM
IS THE KIND
YOU SHARE.
RIDE LIKE THE WIND,
SISTA D.
ENOUGH WITH THE BOX!
I'M OUTTA HERE!
(TIRES SQUEAL
AND ENGINE RUMBLES)
UH-UH-UH,
DANA.
YOU NEED A HALL PASS
FOR ALL 30 FLOORS
TO RIDE LIKE THE WIND
AND TASTE THE SWEET FROTH
OF FREEDOM!
OKAY, CAN I GET A 30-FLOOR
HALL PASS?
SURE!
LAST TIME I CHECKED,
THEY WERE SOMEWHERE
INSIDE THOSE BOXES!
MYRON:
WEEEE!
UH OH.
TAKE MINE, SISTA D.
NOW GO!
AND DON'T LOOK BACK!
DANA:
WOW!
(TIRES SQUEAL,
REVS ENGINE)
(BIKE BELL DINGS
AND WHEELS SQUEAK)
WOW!
WHO KNEW IT WOULD BE
SO MUCH FUN
TO SEE THE WHOLE WORLD,
OR AT LEAST EVERY FLOOR
OF WAYSIDE.
OKAY, CLASS,
EVERYONE TAKE OUT A PENCIL-
MAURECIA:
MRS. JEWLS?
WHERE ARE OUR PENCILS?
WELL, UH, IN,
IN THE PENCIL THINGY.
OH, I DON'T KNOW.
DANA USUALLY HANDS THEM OUT.
STEPHEN:
DANA'S NOT HERE!
WHAT'LL WE DO?!
NOT TO WORRY.
AS YOUR SOMETIME-CLASS
PRESIDENT,
I CAN HANDLE THIS.
(WATER SPLASHES,
FISH FLAPS)
HERE.
THAT'S NOT A PENCIL,
IT'S A FISH!
(COIN CHIMES
AS IT'S FLICKED)
MISS MUSH:
OH! LOOK AT YOU!
WHERE YOU GO?
I'M OFF ON A WAYSIDE
ROAD TRIP!
INCLUDING THE 19TH FLOOR!
MISS MUSH:
HO HO!
19TH FLOOR, HUH?
I GOT JUST THE THING
FOR YOU!
HEY SAMMY!
A CHUNK OF SKUNK,
TWO CENTER LINE BOVINES!
GAG IT N' BAG IT!
HERE YOU GO,
A LITTLE SURPRISE,
TO TIDE YOU OVER!
HAS ANYONE SEEN
MY ASSIGNMENT?
NOT ME.
WHERE'S MY FLUFFY?!
I CAN'T READ
MY FISH'S HANDWRITING!
HMPH!
WAIT! COME BACK!
YOU NEED TO HELP ME
WITH MY MATHEMATICS!
OKAY, CLASS, TIME TO HAND IN
YOUR ASSIGNMENT TO DANA.
OH! UH, I MEAN TO,
TO UH...
DON'T WORRY,
I'VE GOT IT,
MRS. JEWLS!
THERE.
ANYTHING ELSE?
WHAT DO YOU WANT?
WH
(BIKE BELL DINGS
AND TIRE SQUEALS)
MAYBE IT'S TIME
WE FIND DANA.
NONSENSE.
I'VE GOT IT COMPLETELY
UNDER CONTROL.
JOE:
WHERE'S DANA?
MY HEAD IS STUCK!
I CAN'T SEE!
REALLY?
MAYBE WE JUST NEED
MORE LIGHT IN HERE!
CAREFUL, MYRON!
DANA'S THE ONLY ONE
WHO EVER TOUCHES
THOSE DRAPES!
PSHAW!
WHAT COULD GO WRONG?
(SECURITY ALARM
BUZZES LOUDLY)
(WIND GUSTS,
KIDS TEETH CHATTER)
DON'T WORRY.
I'LL JUST CLOSE
THE WINDOW.
(RAIN POURS
AND THUNDER RUMBLES)
IT'S OKAY.
A LITTLE RAIN
NEVER HURT ANYONE.
WOO!
NOW I KNOW WE'RE SAFE.
LIGHTNING NEVER STRIKES
THE SAME PLACE TWICE.
AHH, SEE?
RAIN'S ENDING.
LIGHTNING TOO.
EVERYTHING'LL BE JUST FINE.
AT LEAST THE WORST
IS OVER.
UH, MAYBE WE SHOULD
FIND DANA.
SHE'S NOT UNDER HERE!
AHHH...
I NEEDED THIS BREAK.
I'VE NEVER FELT SO FREE!
IT'S LIKE...
I'M ALMOST OUT
OF THAT BOX,
AND I CAN FINALLY
BREATHE AGAIN.
MYRON:
HELLO, DANA.
WHAT A COINCIDENCE!
WE WERE JUST TALKING
ABOUT YOU IN CLASS!
REALLY
WHAT WERE YOU SAYING?
TODD:
HELP!
HEEELP!
PLEASE, PLEASE
COME BACK
TO CLASS, DANA,
BEFORE THINGS
GET COMPLETELY
OUT OF CONTROL!
I'M LIKE A BOX
INSIDE A BOX,
INSIDE A BOX!
NO WAY!
THAT'S THE OLD
STUCK-IN-A-BOX DANA!
SEE? I TOLD YOU.
I'M NOT DONE
SEEING THE WORLD,
OR AT LEAST ALL 30 FLOORS
OF WAYSIDE.
I STILL HAVE
THE 19TH TO GO.
WOOO!
WELL, THAT'S THAT!
I'M JUST GOING
TO GO UPSTAIRS
AND FINISH ORGANIZING
MRS. JEWLS' CLASS.
ORGANIZE THE CLASS?!
WE GOTTA GET
DANA BACK.
AND I KNOW JUST THE SISTER
TO DO IT.
STEPHEN:
MY MATH!
MY MATHEMATICS!
NOW FOR THE LAST FLOOR -
THE NEVER-SEEN 19!
OKAY, OKAY.
I CAN DO THIS!
I'VE GOTTA FINISH
MY JOURNEY
AND BUST OUT OF MY BOX
FOR GOOD!
JENNY:
HOLD ON THERE, SISTA D.
THERE'S A GOOD REASON
I'VE NEVER SEEN
THE 19TH FLOOR, YOU KNOW.
LEGEND SAYS
THAT'S WHERE THE DOOR
TO MISS ZARVES' CLASS
WAS SUPPOSED TO GO.
MISS ZARVES?
UH HUH.
A FEW YEARS BACK,
THIS KID, NICK,
WANTED TO FIND OUT
WHAT'S UP THERE.
JENNY:
HE WAS A BIT
OF A DAREDEVIL TOO.
AIMED HIMSELF RIGHT
AT THAT DOOR AREA.
SO DID HE FIND
THE 19TH FLOOR?
NO,
OF COURSE NOT.
HE JUST BROKE
HIS ARM.
OH...
BUT THE WEIRD THING IS...
MISS ZARVES
SIGNED HIS CAST!
CREEPY!
LOOK, SISTER DEE!
WHOA!
MISS ZARVES!
WOO HOO!
WE DID IT!
JENNY AND DANA:
OH YEAH! 19TH FLOOR!
AND BACK AGAIN!
HIGH FIVE, SISTER!
RIGHT ON!
BOTH:
WHEW!
DANA?
YEAH, SISTA J?
CAN I HAVE MY BIKE
BACK NOW?
OH YEAH.
TODD:
DANA:
HEY GUYS!
I'VE JUST SEEN
ALL OF WAYSIDE!
THE WAYSIDE TOUR
IS COMPLETE!
TODD:
NOT QUITE, DANA.
THERE'S STILL
ONE MORE STOP
YOU GOTTA MAKE.
RIGHT, MYRON?
DANA, COULD YOU PLEASE
COME UP TO THE 30TH FLOOR
AND FIX THE HORRIBLE MESS
THAT IS ALL MY FAULT?
NO PROBLEMO,
BROTHER M.
SOUNDS LIKE A CRAZY
ADVENTURE!
STEPHEN:
WEEE! MATH!
THANK YOU, MR. BIRDIE!
MRS. JEWLS:
DANA, WE ARE SO GLAD
TO HAVE YOU BACK.
CLASS:
YAY!
WOO-HOO-HOO!
OKAY, BACK TO OUR LESSON.
WHAT'S 4,615,320
TIMES 6,493,121,
DIVIDED BY 4,036,
MINUS 923,000
PLUS 5,300?
MYRON:
MORE FASTER THAN
A SPEEDING BULLET,
MORE POWERFUL THAN
A HERD OF COWS.
ABLE TO LEAP
30-STOREY SCHOOLS
IN A SINGLE BOUND.
IT'S, IT'S, IT'S...
MR. KIDSWATTER!
POSSESSING
REMARKABLE INTELLECT
AND DISGUISED AS HUMBLE
PRINCIPAL OF WAYSIDE,
MR. KIDSWATTER FIGHTS
A NEVER-ENDING BATTLE
FOR EDUCATION
AND ETIQUETTE.
HE HAS A BIG DESK...
AND A MICROPHONE, TOO.
AND WHEN HE TALKS
EVERYONE LISTENS.
ATTENTION, STUDENTS!
ATTENTION!
ATTENTION, ATTENTION...
THIS IS YOUR PRINCIPAL
SPEAKING.
BLAH, BLAH-BLAH, BLAH,
BLAH, BLAH, BLAH-BLAH-BLAH,
BLAH, BLAH, BLAH!
BLAH, BLAH, BLAH,
BLAH-BLAH!
BLAH, BLAH-BLAH,
BLAH, BLAH,
BLAH-BLAH!
BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH.
THANK YOU.
MYRON:
HE IS SO POWERFUL
AND IMPORTANT.
I WANT TO BE POWERFUL
AND IMPORTANT TOO!
JUST LIKE HIM!
THAT'S WHY
HE'S MY HERO.
WHOOSH!
WHOOSH!
WHOOSH!
WHOOSH!
WHOOSH!
THANK YOU FOR THAT
INCREDIBLE REPORT
ON YOUR PERSONAL HERO,
MYRON.
BUT I'M NOT DONE!
I HAVE A SCRAPBOOK
FULL OF MR. K.
PHOTOS, MEMENTOS,
AND EVEN BOOTLEG RECORDINGS
OF HIS PA ANNOUNCEMENTS.
I REMIXED THEM.
ATTENTION-TENTION!
(WORDS ARE MIXED INTO
A BEAT
HIT ME.
(HIP-HOP AND BEAT-BOXING
CONTINUES)
RAISE THE ROOF, Y'ALL!
LET ME HEAR YOU
IN THE BACK ROW!
KIDSWATTER:
MORGAN?
MORGAN!
DID YOU HEAR THAT?
MORGAN!
MY HERO NEEDS ME!
STUPID GOOZACK!
OOF!
OH, HEY THERE, MILO!
IT'S MYRON.
KIDSWATTER:
WHO?
HOW DO I LOOK TODAY?
THERE'S ONLY ONE WORD
FOR THAT.
OW! FOXY!
YOU DA MAN,
MR. K!
KIDSWATTER:
THANKS, MIRROR.
IT'S MYRON.
KIDSWATTER:
NOT YOU, MARVIN.
I'M TALKING
TO THE MIRROR.
OH.
THANKS, MARCIA.
NOW TO GET DOWN
TO BUSINESS.
IT'S MYRON.
BUT YOU KNOW THAT,
MR. KIDSWATTER.
LOOKS LIKE YOU NEED
A NEW SCRAPBOOK.
ACTUALLY,
I NEED A NEW LOCKER.
I'M RUNNING OUT OF ROOM
TO STORE ALL MY MR. K
FAN MEMORABILIA!
I KNOW KIDSWATTER'S
YOUR HERO, MYRON,
BUT SOMETIMES...
DON'T YOU THINK
HE COULD APPRECIATE YOU
A LITTLE MORE?
TODD!
HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT?!
WELL, BECAUSE OF THE FACT
THAT HE DOESN'T EVEN
KNOW YOUR NAME.
HE DOESN'T?
MOJO!
MORTY!
MOLLY!
MORGAN!
MOOCH!
MELVIN!
MARIO!
MICKEY!
MOJO!
MINKY-MONKY-MO!
OH, THOSE ARE JUST
HIS PET NAMES FOR ME.
DANA:
ACCORDING TO MY RECORDS,
I'VE ALSO HEARD HIM
CALL YOU MUSTARD,
MOB, MUFFLER,
MARSHMALLOW...
AT LEAST HE GETS
THE "M" RIGHT.
MAURECIA:
MYRON,
HE HAS NO IDEA
WHO YOU ARE.
IF YOU DON'T BELIEVE ME,
LET'S ASK HIM.
(SNORING,
CLANKING ON DOOR)
MR. KIDSWATTER?
WE GOT A QUESTION.
AH! JUST WORKING!
LET ME GET THAT,
MR. KIDSWATTER.
THANKS A LOT, MUNCHY.
IT'S MYRON.
WHO?
MR. KIDSWATTER,
WE'RE TRYING
TO PROVE A POINT.
CAN YOU JUST TELL US
WHAT MYRON'S NAME IS?
SURE! IT'S... MMM...
THINK HARD.
HE'S YOUR BIGGEST FAN!
MMM...
HMM...
MMM...
C'MON, MR. K,
YOU KNOW THIS!
MMM...
MYRON!
MMM...
MM.
MMM...
OKAY, THAT'S ENOUGH.
HE GOT THE "M" RIGHT
AND THAT'S GOOD ENOUGH
FOR ME!
KIDSWATTER:
WAIT!
I KNOW!
IT'S MMM... LAWRENCE!
L-L-L-L-L...
LAWRENCE?
NOOOOOOOOO!
WHAT'S WITH THAT
MARTY KID?
I'VE BEEN
SUCH A FOOL.
SUCH A... A...
A LAWRENCE.
TODD:
MYRON,
WE DIDN'T MEAN
TO UPSET YOU.
WE JUST DIDN'T WANT
MR. KIDSWATTER
TO TAKE ADVANTAGE
OF YOU ANYMORE.
YEAH!
MAYBE YOU SHOULD JUST
GIVE UP ON KIDSWATTER
AND FIND A NEW HERO.
LIKE MY FAVORITE
SUPERSTAR,
ANNIE WHEELZ!
SHE'S THE ONLY KID
TO EVER COMPLETE
A QUADRUPLE, INSIDE-OUT,
REVERSE MOBIUS-TWIST!
ANNOUNCER:
THERE SHE GOES.
HER FINAL ATTEMPT.
ANNIE WHEELER
HAS NAILED IT AGAIN!
EVERY TIME I TRY...
WOO HOO!
OH, ANNIE.
I AM NOT WORTHY.
NAH!
I THINK I NEED SOMEONE
A LITTLE MORE EXCITING.
DANA:
WELL...
IF EXCITEMENT'S
YOUR GAME,
TRY MY HERO:
MELVILLE LOUIS KUSSOTH DEWEY,
FOUNDER OF THE DEWEY
DECIMAL SYSTEM,
THE SINGLE MOST
EFFECTIVE FORM
OF ORGANIZATION
IN THE WORLD!
(SOUND OF AIR FLOWING
THROUGH A HOLLOW TUBE)
DANA,
I THINK YOUR DEWEY
DID HIM IN.
BUT WAIT 'TIL
HE SEES MY HERO.
LIEUTENANT LOGIC!
HE THINKS
EVERYTHING THROUGH
TO IT'S MOST LOGICAL
CONCLUSION.
AND THEN,
HE SAVES THE DAY!
UM, IF THAT'S THE PRACTICAL
THING TO DO,
OF COURSE.
WHY ISN'T HE
IN COLOUR?
BECAUSE HE ONLY SEES
IN BLACK AND WHITE.
LIEUTENANT LOGIC:
YOU CAN RUN,
BUT YOU CAN'T HIDE
FROM THE LOGIC HAMMER!
THAT DOESN'T
MAKE ANY SENSE!
WHO CARES ABOUT LOGIC
ANYWAY?!
I'M OFF TO FIND
A NEW HERO!
MYRON:
OKAY, SHOW ME WHAT YA GOT.
'SCUSE ME?
MYRON:
I SAID, "SHOW ME WHAT YA GOT!"
SOUNDS A BIT CONFUSED.
CAN YOU TRY IT AGAIN,
THIS TIME,
MORE... HEROIC!
UM... OKAY.
BUT WHY?
MYRON:
DIDN'T YOU READ
THE SIGN-UP SHEET
WHEN YOU WALKED
INTO THE AUDITION?
I'M LOOKING
FOR A NEW HERO.
SOMEONE POWERFUL,
IMPORTANT,
AND INSPIRING.
I JUST CAME HERE
TO CHANGE A LIGHTBULB.
MYRON:
NEXT!!
HERE YOU GO, BABOOTSKI.
NICE BIG HERO SANDWICH.
OOH!
THAT'S NOT
THE KIND OF HERO
I WAS THINKING OF,
BUT WHY NOT?
MMM! SAY, THIS IS GOOD.
WHAT'S IN IT ANYWAY?
IT MOSTLY WET SAND,
WITH A LITTLE BIT
OF MAYONNAISE.
MYRON:
MAYONNAISE?!
YUCK!
NEXT!
HMM...
PUT HER DOWN
FOR A CALLBACK.
WE'LL BE IN TOUCH!
HEY, FOX-
MY COMPLEXION!
HMM...
STRANGE.
WHERE'S MY COFFEE?
MAYBE I'LL HAVE A DOUGHNUT.
SOMETHING IS DEFINITELY
MISSING AROUND HERE.
BUT WHAT?
MYRON:
NEXT!
NEXT!
WOOOO!
MYRON:
NEXT!
MYRON:
NEXT!
NEXT!
UGH!
A HERO SHOULD INSPIRE ME,
AND SOMEHOW MAKE MY LIFE
BETTER EVERY DAY.
I'LL NEVER FIND ANYONE HERE
LIKE THAT.
KIDSWATTER:
HELP!
HAS ANYONE SEEN MY HERO?
MR. KIDSWATTER?!
YOU'RE LOOKING FOR WHO?
MY PERSONAL HERO.
I CAN'T FIND HIM ANYWHERE!
WHAT AN AMAZING FELLA!
SOMEHOW MADE MY LIFE
EVEN BETTER EVERY DAY,
AND MADE GREAT DOUGHNUTS.
WOW!
WHAT'S THE NAME
OF THIS MOST INCREDIBLE
HERO PERSON?
I BELIEVE IT'S LAWRENCE.
KNOW HIM?
NO. CAN'T SAY I DO,
BUT HE SOUNDS LIKE
HERO MATERIAL TO ME.
WHATEVER.
I'LL JUST HAVE TO KEEP
LOOKING FOR HIM.
HERO?
HERO!
WHERE ARE YOU?
DANA, WE NEED TO FIND
THIS LAWRENCE KID.
I CAN MAKE HIM
MY HERO TOO!
MYRON, DON'T YOU GET IT?
DANA, TODD AND MAURECIA:
YOU'RE LAWRENCE!
REMEMBER MR. KIDSWATTER
CALLED YOU THAT
WHEN HE TRIED TO THINK
OF YOUR NAME?
HMM....
LAWRENCE!
YOU MEAN, I'M ACTUALLY
MR. K'S HERO?
AND MY OWN HERO TOO?
AND YOUR OWN
BIGGEST FAN!
KIDSWATTER:
HERO! WHERE ARE YOU?
HOLD ON, MR. KIDSWATTER!
I'LL HELP!
WHERE'S THE GOOZACK!
OH, THERE YOU ARE,
LAWRENCE.
SO GLAD YOU COULD HELP.
THAT'S WHAT
A GREAT HERO DOES.
ESPECIALLY IF THAT HERO
IS ALSO HIS OWN BIGGEST FAN!
WHATEVER!
C'MON LESTER,
LET'S GET SOME DOUGHNUTS.
IT'S LAWRENCE!
KIDSWATTER:
IF YOU SAY SO, LORRAINE.